Be careful whom you call a friend. If you don't want something to be known don't tell it. Confiding in people is a dangerous proposition. I have been shocked at the things (lies) people have told behind my back. People are not your friends. If you want a friend, get a dog or a cat. Then, you'll have a TRUE friend. Lots of people parading around pretending to be your friend and smile to your face while stabbing you in the back at the same time. Just because someone smiles at you doesn't' mean they're your friend
In summary ; avoid 1. The change-resistant friend (they hate self improvement) 2. The complacent friend (they never take you seriously. 3. The reckless (dramatic and troublesome - resistant to advice) 4. The jealous friend. 5. The criticiser (they naturally abhore dreams) 6. The "if I can't do it, you can't do it." ( their greatest joy is to see you fail) 7. The negative minded friend. 8. The boundary breacher. 9. The malicious (they are always fault-finding ) 10. The guilt tripper ( they manipulate you to think you don't do enough)
I’m a man. but I can’t help being your fan. You are definitely helping men by helping women. Hopefully homes will get back together with these very insightful and wise teachings. Thank you.
Some family members can be the most toxic .. they alway look at you with a smirk or a frown like there's something wrong with you.. you always feel so sick in your stomach when you're around them... and you always feel happy or content with yourself. It's like you always need to prove to them that you are good enough... but you never ever feel adequate around them.
A really genuine good friend is like a rare diamond. The human race is so wounded and unhealed. We have become so terrible at love I always ask God to put His spirit of love inside of me. Be a being of love. EXUDE LOVE
I can tell you as a woman getting to her 30's that the friend circle is soooo important in how you end up in your future. Ofc spending time with family and friends in your work can also impact you. Just chose to speak with people that are good for you and are how you want to be.
Get rid of low-key haters. I got rid of two so-called friends that were low-key haters. Very happy to be rid of their toxic behavior. Snide comments, etc. They claim they don't know why ? Really ! They KNOW
Great list! Super important and it weeds alot of unsavory results out of your life. Better to be friendless for awhile and get closer to The Most High than to desperately cling to the distractions..the enemy put in your life to keep you away from Abba's purpose for your life...
You are the sum of who you hang out with. You also start exhibiting their characteristics. I thought that the removal of these friends from my life was a loss. No, it was me realizing who I am. Thank you for the videos on the leveling up journey. 🧡
For all the points that you just mentioned and some more, I don’t have friends. I only deal with my family and with some of them I have to be like walking on egg shells. There are is always dramas with family so I think that’s enough. I used to give myself entirely to friends, honestly, entirely, not anymore. I’ve learn so much, well….I’m 73 now, so I have had enough experience. Thank you again for your work and for making these super helping videos. We all need them ❤
If you want to level up and be classy, stay away from trashy women! If you don’t want to be a pick me, stay away from those types! I’m really struggling w this. You really are who you’re friends are.
Lady of Elegance are real. I have experience alot around me sometimes negative energy from other. I have a friend very mouthy and gobby do go mile of insults. I have learn not to speak too much of my plans in front of her. 😮👀🙏🏿ENGLAND 🏴
I used to have many friends who I thought could be trusted I almost ended up with money and financial problem just for helping others now I'm very precaution and try to be careful who to be friends with!
Hey Vivian. I really like your videos. Accept love from Cameroon. I listened to this video at the angle of " could I be one or more types of a friend that my "so called friend" might think to avoid someday?" I'm a selective person when it gets to putting some people in my "circle of friends" and that keeps me moving stress-free in life. It's heart warming to know you're not as named above to those you love and call friends.❤
Thank you Vivian. Yes, I agree with your list. I had a so called friend and I had to get advice from the police to deal with some of the antics, she was very sneaky! That done, my life improved no end. I later found out that another mutual friend was having a bad time with her too. A regular church goer, no one would suspect her. I still keep the crime reference reports as a reminder to be more discerning.
OMG. That sounds like our neighbor. We had to threaten her with the police and lawyer's office. She is also very sneaky / phony. We're very glad to be rid of her. She terrorized us constantly.
@@tina8796 Glad that life has improved for you. Nobody really understands how bad it can get, they think you're crazy. My trust in people has changed, a lesson learned for sure.
Dear Elegance. You are right about everything.I grew up thinking I had to please everyone and accept people as they were.Thank God ,I was somehow aware of bad paths one can take and that stopped me from being with the wrong people.
My main red flags in choosing friends are: 1. Obvious toxic traits: jealous, gossiper, lack of integrity (liar, user, transactional, manipulator, criminal). They may start as a witty joker of the group gossiping about common acquaintances or celebrities or circumstances but soon they betray their jealousy, lack of integrity and only thrive for drama or to use others and then turn against you the moment you say no to them. 2. Naggers, complainers, criticizers, eternal victims. These people are incapable of doing things on their own, they'd rather blame everyone for the world being unfair, and will look for any excuse not to level up. They will also play 'experts' on how things should be done, never applying the same principles themselves. Worse, they will turn into toxic people from list no 1 as soon as YOU start succeeding inspite of the excuses they made for their failures. 3. Mentally immature people, sometimes because of one or multiple personality or brain disorders. These people need to see a therapist to heal before they form any relationship. Some of them need medication to control their disorders. Sad as it is, stay away from them the moment they betray any of the traits associated with mental disorder or even admit they have one or multiple.
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.
I ve recently made the difficult decision to ask myself the hardest questions about my friendships. I discovered that a childhood friend who sometimes reaches out to me was a source of negativity, vulgarity and even abuse. When I told this friend just a little bit about how I felt she immediately justified herself, blamed me and twisted my words. I hope I will have the courage to cut her off completly. Thank you Viviene for your content! ❤
THANKS, I'VE RECENTLY HAD AN AWAKENING WHERE IT RELATES TO TRUE AND REAL FRIENDSHIP, I WILL NOW AUDIT TO CHOOSE WISELY. WHERE I AM IN MY JOURNEY AT THIS PRESENT MOMENT, I CHOOSE PEACE OVER DRAMA.
When a friend wants to change I always say: you are a good person but you know who you are and you know what is best in your journey so I will support you through it
❤❤❤ I've recently stumbled upon your chanel, and I'm just LOVING it. Beautifully presented, such interesting, honest and eloquent topics... they are difficult to resist. I've recently retired and began a 2 year long African Adventure Trip throughout my continent of Africa... well this "LEVELING UP" journey has clearly reflected which friends belong to which category. I quickly sifted out the jealous ones. Thank you for a beautiful chanel. ❤❤❤
Hello, thank you for this video. This is really good advice. I am sorry for the back-stabbing that happened to you, I mean it; it happened to me too. Sabine.
Over the years, I’ve had to end “friendships” with a few people who were passive aggressive. I once heard a pastor say, “If you don’t know who you are, there are people who will try to tell you.”
I have never had a good friend. I don’t know why. But I am older now but I love your videos and will follow your information. ( I feel like I am a kind person )
I lost two good friends on my growth journey. It's the best decision I have made . When the time comes I'll be open to making friends who are not intimidated by my growth . ❤❤❤
This video arrives in a moment of my life of deep changes and leveling up goals humanly and professionaly. I'm getting rid of a lot of people who used to call themselves "my friends". Some of them using the Bible too!
I wish I had found you out ten years back. I would never have gone through a lot of wicked friends you mentioned . I have very few friends and I feel light , unlike back then when I entertained people I called friends who had I'll intentions.
Some friends would discourage you to check the disadvantaged and make you feel bad when you reach out...yet they later still your ideas to prove that they are better than you.
Wow that’s very sad that’s why I never let your friend meet your lover or husband. I’ve learnt from that it’s very important that was the jealous tactic. Sorry to hear that what’s meant to be will be😮…
Wise word's thank you.Just one question what can I do when friends give empty promises, saying yes they are coming then don't. Your advice would be appreciated,.
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Be careful whom you call a friend. If you don't want something to be known don't tell it. Confiding in people is a dangerous proposition. I have been shocked at the things (lies) people have told behind my back. People are not your friends. If you want a friend, get a dog or a cat. Then, you'll have a TRUE friend. Lots of people parading around pretending to be your friend and smile to your face while stabbing you in the back at the same time. Just because someone smiles at you doesn't' mean they're your friend
Sad but true.
💯
Agree
So Bam Nailed it !
When People Show You Who They Are Believe Them: Maya Angelou
True story
"Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”" (1 Corinthians 15:33 NIV)
Amen.
No truer words were ever spoken
Absolutely 🤍
Yes!
Amen... Always look for God-fearing women!❤
In summary ; avoid
1. The change-resistant friend (they hate self improvement)
2. The complacent friend (they never take you seriously.
3. The reckless (dramatic and troublesome - resistant to advice)
4. The jealous friend.
5. The criticiser (they naturally abhore dreams)
6. The "if I can't do it, you can't do it." ( their greatest joy is to see you fail)
7. The negative minded friend.
8. The boundary breacher.
9. The malicious (they are always fault-finding )
10. The guilt tripper ( they manipulate you to think you don't do enough)
Very helpful, thanks. Was in a hurry 😅
Also, be careful with who fake praise you, but deep down, they mean nothing with smilely face.
@@Momo-lv4kntrue
Thanks!
So Helpful Thanks 🌸
The jealous "friend" is NOT your friend. They're a low-key hater
Exactly 💯
“Hater” is low class, tacky slang…..
I’m a man. but I can’t help being your fan. You are definitely helping men by helping women. Hopefully homes will get back together with these very insightful and wise teachings. Thank you.
Isn't she sublime?
Thank you for being here; we need healthy men too. Not enough people doing the work in such weird times.
This list applies to ALL relationships for me! Friends, family, romantic, work, acquaintances...
YES!!!!!
Yes 🙌
‼ People who are gossiping to you are gossiping ABOUT YOU. And you can take that to the bank ‼
Agree
True
Agree 👍
Amen!!!!
My Dad always said, 'Better alone than in bad company."
Some family members can be the most toxic .. they alway look at you with a smirk or a frown like there's something wrong with you.. you always feel so sick in your stomach when you're around them... and you always feel happy or content with yourself. It's like you always need to prove to them that you are good enough... but you never ever feel adequate around them.
A really genuine good friend is like a rare diamond. The human race is so wounded and unhealed. We have become so terrible at love I always ask God to put His spirit of love inside of me. Be a being of love. EXUDE LOVE
So true. The human race is beyond wounded. We are suffering from spiritual gangrene.
Well said.
I can tell you as a woman getting to her 30's that the friend circle is soooo important in how you end up in your future. Ofc spending time with family and friends in your work can also impact you. Just chose to speak with people that are good for you and are how you want to be.
Get rid of low-key haters. I got rid of two so-called friends that were low-key haters. Very happy to be rid of their toxic behavior. Snide comments, etc. They claim they don't know why ? Really ! They KNOW
Great list! Super important and it weeds alot of unsavory results out of your life. Better to be friendless for awhile and get closer to The Most High than to desperately cling to the distractions..the enemy put in your life to keep you away from Abba's purpose for your life...
You are the sum of who you hang out with. You also start exhibiting their characteristics. I thought that the removal of these friends from my life was a loss. No, it was me realizing who I am. Thank you for the videos on the leveling up journey. 🧡
For all the points that you just mentioned and some more, I don’t have friends. I only deal with my family and with some of them I have to be like walking on egg shells. There are is always dramas with family so I think that’s enough. I used to give myself entirely to friends, honestly, entirely, not anymore. I’ve learn so much, well….I’m 73 now, so I have had enough experience. Thank you again for your work and for making these super helping videos. We all need them ❤
Unfortunately, there are too many people like this around, you have to take care of yourself. Excellent video, thank you for sharing ❤
@@ElegantLily5rh2
I use the term "friends" loosely. They are not many out there....
wouldn’t using it loosely imply that you call any and everybody friend?
Very Tru
As always another insightful and encouraging video! This type of video is also an important reminder to myself to not be that type of person as well.
If you want to level up and be classy, stay away from trashy women! If you don’t want to be a pick me, stay away from those types! I’m really struggling w this. You really are who you’re friends are.
Hey Vivian I love your content, can you please consider doing a video on toxic parents that manipulates and how to detach from them?
Define your limits, find your own home, be respectful at all time. 😉
First view 😅. Can you please a make a video on the most common etiquette mistakes people do? Thank you.
Lady of Elegance are real. I have experience alot around me sometimes negative energy from other. I have a friend very mouthy and gobby do go mile of insults. I have learn not to speak too much of my plans in front of her. 😮👀🙏🏿ENGLAND 🏴
Thank you for this video! Much needed and you are awesome!
I would not call someone who is jealous of me a friend. Jealousy is a muderous spirit.
Good topic. Good job! True friends are priceless and rare. If you have one good friend you are blessed.
Vivi you are indeed an elegance ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤we shall eliminate such kind of friends around us ❤
Oh Vivian, you just described some of my family members, including my mom! 😮
Micah 7:5-6
These are all spot on!! Sadly, a lot I recognize in people who are supposed to be my spiritual family. 😏 Bad association 🎯
@@Heythere2810 Absolutely
Viv ❤very well said. At my 50 years I said good bye to growth without forgetting my family members and I am at peace ✌️ ❤
I used to have many friends who I thought could be trusted I almost ended up with money and financial problem just for helping others now I'm very precaution and try to be careful who to be friends with!
Great to be back here again.
Thank you for sharing such great information.
Hey Vivian. I really like your videos. Accept love from Cameroon.
I listened to this video at the angle of " could I be one or more types of a friend that my "so called friend" might think to avoid someday?" I'm a selective person when it gets to putting some people in my "circle of friends" and that keeps me moving stress-free in life. It's heart warming to know you're not as named above to those you love and call friends.❤
Hello to Cameroon!
@@jessicasteele2761 thanks a lot🙌.
Thank you Vivian. Yes, I agree with your list. I had a so called friend and I had to get advice from the police to deal with some of the antics, she was very sneaky! That done, my life improved no end. I later found out that another mutual friend was having a bad time with her too. A regular church goer, no one would suspect her. I still keep the crime reference reports as a reminder to be more discerning.
OMG. That sounds like our neighbor. We had to threaten her with the police and lawyer's office. She is also very sneaky / phony. We're very glad to be rid of her. She terrorized us constantly.
@@tina8796 Glad that life has improved for you. Nobody really understands how bad it can get, they think you're crazy. My trust in people has changed, a lesson learned for sure.
i love your videos and i appreciate your service of teaching us ❤
Dear Elegance.
You are right about everything.I grew up thinking I had to please everyone and accept people as they were.Thank God ,I was somehow aware of bad paths one can take and that stopped me from being with the wrong people.
My main red flags in choosing friends are:
1. Obvious toxic traits: jealous, gossiper, lack of integrity (liar, user, transactional, manipulator, criminal). They may start as a witty joker of the group gossiping about common acquaintances or celebrities or circumstances but soon they betray their jealousy, lack of integrity and only thrive for drama or to use others and then turn against you the moment you say no to them.
2. Naggers, complainers, criticizers, eternal victims. These people are incapable of doing things on their own, they'd rather blame everyone for the world being unfair, and will look for any excuse not to level up. They will also play 'experts' on how things should be done, never applying the same principles themselves. Worse, they will turn into toxic people from list no 1 as soon as YOU start succeeding inspite of the excuses they made for their failures.
3. Mentally immature people, sometimes because of one or multiple personality or brain disorders. These people need to see a therapist to heal before they form any relationship. Some of them need medication to control their disorders. Sad as it is, stay away from them the moment they betray any of the traits associated with mental disorder or even admit they have one or multiple.
Thank you very much, Vivian, for sharing. Indeed, your lesson is very uplifting and educative.
That’s why I rarely have friends. That’s something that’s hard to find today.
I love that "No one really fails, unless the make the decision/choice of not trying again". Right on point
You are really elegant yourself my dear. Thank you for what you are doing.
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counsellor, and how do i reach her?
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive.
Thank you Vee❤😊
I ve recently made the difficult decision to ask myself the hardest questions about my friendships. I discovered that a childhood friend who sometimes reaches out to me was a source of negativity, vulgarity and even abuse. When I told this friend just a little bit about how I felt she immediately justified herself, blamed me and twisted my words. I hope I will have the courage to cut her off completly.
Thank you Viviene for your content! ❤
Your skin is glowing, so beautiful! Thanks for your video
THANKS, I'VE RECENTLY HAD AN AWAKENING WHERE IT RELATES TO TRUE AND REAL FRIENDSHIP, I WILL NOW AUDIT TO CHOOSE WISELY. WHERE I AM IN MY JOURNEY AT THIS PRESENT MOMENT, I CHOOSE PEACE OVER DRAMA.
I have zero friends and I prefer it that way. Most people are toxic and fake.
Beautiful lovely elegant lady of wisdom
Excellent video! Came right in time when I just had a row with a “criticizer”!
When a friend wants to change I always say: you are a good person but you know who you are and you know what is best in your journey so I will support you through it
Sooo touching… sharing your personal experience sinks this episode deeper.Thank you for what you do Viv
❤❤❤
I've recently stumbled upon your chanel, and I'm just LOVING it. Beautifully presented, such interesting, honest and eloquent topics... they are difficult to resist.
I've recently retired and began a 2 year long African Adventure Trip throughout my continent of Africa... well this "LEVELING UP" journey has clearly reflected which friends belong to which category. I quickly sifted out the jealous ones.
Thank you for a beautiful chanel.
❤❤❤
On point! Thx for the absolute truth!
Thank for sharing this useful information.
I think this advice really helps in the workplace too.
Hello, thank you for this video. This is really good advice. I am sorry for the back-stabbing that happened to you, I mean it; it happened to me too. Sabine.
Thank you very much for your inspiring and informative information. I do appreciate it. Love ❤️ and Light 💡.
Open my eyes to the toxic friends in my life, God bless you Vivian ❤
I came across this channel today. I decided to subscribe to your channel. Your words are full of wisdom.❤
Over the years, I’ve had to end “friendships” with a few people who were passive aggressive. I once heard a pastor say, “If you don’t know who you are, there are people who will try to tell you.”
Jealous friends soo toxic avoid those ppme
I have never had a good friend. I don’t know why. But I am older now but I love your videos and will follow your information. ( I feel like I am a kind person )
Useful points. Most describe narcissistic behaviour. Steer clear.
Thank you Ms Vivienne.
Good and educational presentation. God bless you richly Vivian ❤
Impressive! Thank you ❤
I lost two good friends on my growth journey. It's the best decision I have made . When the time comes I'll be open to making friends who are not intimidated by my growth . ❤❤❤
This is so true about the jealousy so true even your family can say you could never . … so smart thing to do is Do you don’t say a word
i found these points totally useful. Thaks
Great and amazing lesson
I throughly enjoy your content. Is it possible you could create a video about how an elegant lady should act?
Luckily I've never had a jealous friend! Thank you Vivienne :)
Thanks for sharing ma'am I'm reminded about whom to dislodge and whom to keep.
This is very helpful and knowledgeable! Would love to hear a video on the kinds of qualities to look for to cultivate healthy friendships
Thank you that was the best advice clear and concise and to the point
This video arrives in a moment of my life of deep changes and leveling up goals humanly and professionaly. I'm getting rid of a lot of people who used to call themselves "my friends". Some of them using the Bible too!
God bless you sis. Thank you 💜
Very useful
God bless and keep you Vivian
All About boundries and you are well defining.thank you.
I just wanted to say thank you for these videos ❤
This is great information. It is true Bad company corrupts good morals. This is biblical. Being excepted is overrated.
I love this video ❤ thanks 🙏
you are such a breath of fresh air.
Excellent!
Very helpful! Thank you so much for doing this 😊❤❤❤❤
Friends are full of " " you know what? So it best to be your best friend. Have no attachment but have fun
Thank you for delivering such quality content. ❤
nice one, i love your channel
I wish I had found you out ten years back. I would never have gone through a lot of wicked friends you mentioned .
I have very few friends and I feel light , unlike back then when I entertained people I called friends who had I'll intentions.
Love you n thank you❤🙏🏼
Very informative
I love your channel
I had a friend who have all. Of the character, it was so draining pulling up with her. I just has to walk away coz I got tired of the negativity.
You kinda described my mom! 😅
Just because we’re family I can do this. Lol
👏👏👏👏👏 still hoping to receive the book 👍🏽
You are 90 million percent correct love you to the max ❤️❤️❤️❤️💪💪💪🇧🇸🙋
Please do we have to tell others about our level journey when we are now taking baby steps
Some friends would discourage you to check the disadvantaged and make you feel bad when you reach out...yet they later still your ideas to prove that they are better than you.
Thank you for sharing❤
Your skin is glowing, what do you use?
Wow that’s very sad that’s why I never let your friend meet your lover or husband. I’ve learnt from that it’s very important that was the jealous tactic. Sorry to hear that what’s meant to be will be😮…
Wise word's thank you.Just one question what can I do when friends give empty promises, saying yes they are coming then don't. Your advice would be appreciated,.