German Kindergarten was NOT What We Expected! 🇩🇪 Our Experience + Vorschule & Culture Shocks

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 มิ.ย. 2024
  • Here is part two of our German Kindergarten Culture Shocks series! If you haven't seen part one yet, watch that first, or this video might not make much sense :) - • German Kindergarten Cu... .
    In this video, we will share your comments about kindergarten, talk about Vorschule, and share our daughter's experience so far in a German kindergarten as an American girl. When we moved to Germany, we put a lot of thought and effort into helping our three boys integrate into Grundschule. We honestly thought starting Ella in Kindergarten would be easy...but we were wrong! See how it was for her and how we all grew and learned through the experience.
    📖 See the blog post that goes with this video here - mymerrymessygermanlife.com/ge...
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    //ABOUT US//
    We are a family of six, with four kids and a cat 😹, who moved from the USA to Germany in February of 2021 to pursue our dreams of adventure, travel, learning another language, and integrating into German life. We hope you enjoy our videos about our journey to integrate - the highs and the lows of being foreigners on the adventure of a lifetime.
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    //CHAPTERS//
    0:00 - Go on an autumn hike with us right out of our backyard!
    2:02 - A little about our crazy family
    2:48 - Vorschule - all about the last year of German Kindergarten
    4:29 - Kindergarten is not free all over Germany
    5:03 - Why we didn't even send our eldest boys to preschool in America
    7:40 - Some of our favorite comments from Germans about Kindergarten
    16:29 - Our personal experience with Ella in German Kindergarten as an American

ความคิดเห็น • 723

  • @gilliantracy7991
    @gilliantracy7991 2 ปีที่แล้ว +266

    This is such an important video on so many levels. 60 year old American here sitting here crying as I suddenly realized the reason I can't remember any of my childhood is because I never had one. I was raised by kind people in New York City but they were the "sit down and be quiet" type of parents. My kindergarten teacher was a tough old lady drill sergeant. I had to be an adult fast and it's cost me in my adult life. I'm cheering the importance of play in kindergarten in Germany! Another thing that I cheer is your allowing Ella to learn German at her pace and to embrace communication with others even if she can't speak the language. My Dad had a German friend that he could not communicate with verbally but they communicated with hand signals etc successfully. I learned early that you can communicate with anyone if you make the effort! Everyone in the US should see this video! Thank you so much!

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      I loved your comment so much. Anything that helps us to heal and understand more is a very valuable thing! And yes, it’s so very important that we get to have a childhood. ❤️❤️

    • @b.kr.3501
      @b.kr.3501 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      I'm so sorry to hear that, Gillian! 😘

    • @xarexes7070
      @xarexes7070 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Uhh, i'm 48 year old German (tomorrow ;)
      In the past, it was not going this way and we had to follow the rules too.

    • @helgemoller5158
      @helgemoller5158 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Sorry to read this Gillian. I´ m a 54 year old German. Grown up on the Countryside. Never had to sit down strictly and listening, as long as i remember. But if the weather was good a lot of walks with the whole class into the nature. @Xarexes which rules ?

    • @teardrop-in-a-fishbowl
      @teardrop-in-a-fishbowl 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@helgemoller5158 I'm 57 and the mixture between playing, going outside to explore nature and sitting down to listen to the teacher was maybe 80% to 20%. I loved my Kindergarten and the teacher. Fun fact, I'm the youngest if four, I was bored in school for one year (first one) bc I could already read, wright and do math. Sometimes I was bored later on too, but that's another story. lol 😆

  • @HintOfSilver
    @HintOfSilver 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I'm 27 years old now and I still know all the words to "Wie schön, dass du geboren bist" by heart. I loved celebrating birthdays in Kindergarten!

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Awe that’s wonderful! I can see how Germans would have sweet kindergarten memories as it’s such a precious time.

  • @helfgott1
    @helfgott1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +88

    Dear Friends
    i am a grumpy 61 years german and i do remember to sing the birthday song. Now for those of u who might be interested in the lyrics:
    How wonderful that you were born by:
    Rolf Zuckowski
    It can rain today
    Storm or snow
    Because you shine yourself
    Like the sunshine
    Today is your birthday
    That's why we celebrate
    All of your friends
    Be happy with you
    All of your friends
    Be happy with you
    How wonderful that you were born
    We would otherwise have missed you very much
    How nice that we are together
    We congratulate you, birthday child
    How wonderful that you were born
    We would otherwise have missed you very much
    How nice that we are together
    We congratulate you, birthday child
    Our good wishes
    Have their reason
    Please stay a long time
    Happy and healthy
    So happy to see you
    Is what we like
    There are already tears
    Enough in this world
    There are already tears
    Enough in this world
    How wonderful that you were born
    We would otherwise have missed you very much
    How nice that we are together
    We congratulate you, birthday child
    How wonderful that you were born
    We would otherwise have missed you very much
    How nice that we are together
    We congratulate you, birthday child
    Monday Tuesday Wednesday
    It doesn't matter
    Your birthday only comes once a year
    So let's celebrate
    That the rind cracks
    Today there is dancing
    Singed and laughed
    Today there is dancing
    Singed and laughed
    How wonderful that you were born
    We would otherwise have missed you very much
    How nice that we are together
    We congratulate you, birthday child 😊

    • @helfgott1
      @helfgott1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Here is an example of the german lyrics: th-cam.com/video/XaKPbXXbtWY/w-d-xo.html

    • @lissalack1490
      @lissalack1490 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      thank you for showing us the lyrics!

    • @susannabonke8552
      @susannabonke8552 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Helfgott das war herzerwärmend.. sowas sagt man in Deutsch eher weniger, Amerikaner sagen das dauernd. Und es ist durchaus kein Kitsch.

    • @31337flamer
      @31337flamer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Rolf Zuckowski beste .. Ich schaff das schon, Ich schaff das ganz alleine!

    • @susannabonke8552
      @susannabonke8552 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@31337flamer tolles Lied

  • @ruhrvalley78tk30
    @ruhrvalley78tk30 2 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    Actually I‘m quite curious to see how your kids will react to all the christmas habits in Germany. Especially the Christmas Markets.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      We're so excited to go to the Christmas markets with the kids!

  • @cacklebarnacle15
    @cacklebarnacle15 2 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    The thing about mixed age groups is not only that the younger ones learn from the older ones. The older children learn how to structure knowledge when they teach something to the younger ones. They themself get to learn how to learn, wich will help them once they are in school, since they already have experience in managing their own knowledge.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yeah good point!

    • @DieAlteistwiederda
      @DieAlteistwiederda 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's great for those kids that don't have siblings at home Especially not younger siblings in my opinion. I'm the youngest and my nephew was born when I was 9 almost 10 years old but even before that I had plenty of opportunities to interact with younger kids in both Kindergarten and elementary school through Hort and all of those after-school activities that were mixed by age too.

  • @butcheromance
    @butcheromance 2 ปีที่แล้ว +190

    I like that you mentioned that your son, who was academically ahead, maybe still would have benefitted from play-focussed kindergarten - because #relatable. I was held back from going to school when I was almost six (when you're in a certain age range, guardians can choose whether to send you at almost six or almost seven) because my kindergarten teachers said "Academically [they] could easily do it, but we think [they]'d benefit from having some more time to build self-confidence."
    Years later, it turned out I'm not necessarily shy or insecure; I'm just autistic. But having extra time to grow into myself and freely interact with other children without pressure to perform in school was probably a good thing. Now I'm 26, doing a PhD and teaching at university - I don't think learning to spell a year earlier would have improved my academic development all that drastically :D There's no need to rush.

    • @MrLotrecht
      @MrLotrecht 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thank you for these real words!

    • @Timinator0815
      @Timinator0815 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      My story was somewhat similar and I am happy my kindergarten teachers let me play for another year in Vorschule 😊 I did my Abitur as the best student of the year and just finished my Bachelor's in Computer Science with a pretty decent grade. Now doing my Master's and aiming for a scientific career :)

    • @TheRealChaosQueen
      @TheRealChaosQueen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Statistically, those with almost 6 will lack behind those with almost 7. A lot happens in that year...

    • @user-om5tv5fd9s
      @user-om5tv5fd9s 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Similar thing for me. I was put into a „pre school class“ for a slow transition from kindergarten to elementary school and was supposed to stay there for a year. But they insisted on shifting me to first grade because academically speaking I was more than ready. Unfortunately, socially speaking I was not developed enough so I was totally socially inept throughout with most „friends“ I had being kids in classes below me. So it would have probably been better for me to develop my social skills more before moving over to school.

    • @wora1111
      @wora1111 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That is exactly what we told our daughter. And what the Betreuer in Kindergarten told her. And the Kinderarzt we went to. And her future teacher. She talked each of us into the ground til we gave up. We only got back at her when she wanted to go abroad alone for a social year after G8 and noticed that she wasn't 18 years old yet. And yes, she tackled that problem as well and went.

  • @LuckyGirlsTown
    @LuckyGirlsTown 2 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    I worked at a German kindergarten for a year. There definitely are deviating behaviors among the children (I think that’s an intrinsic human trait) but we never made those the center of attention to their parents. We mentioned problematic behaviors only if they were regularly disrupting the group or as a means to suggest outside support for the child or family (i.e. OT, speech therapy, Einzelintegration [basically an individual coming into Kindergarten for a few hours a week to support one child]).

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yeah, there ya go. Much different mindset when we are trying to solve the root of the behavior, instead of trying to punish the behavior.

  • @peterpain6625
    @peterpain6625 2 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I am sure "sit still and be quiet" is one of the worst things you can do to a childs development.

  • @ramona146
    @ramona146 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    You mentioned behavioural problems in american kindergardens. I'm a kindergarten teacher in Lower-Saxony. We noticed too that there is more tension in the group and kids get angry easier when they are indoors for a longer time or they have to sit still and concentrate for a longer time. That's the reason why we go out a lot of time no matter how the weather is. To build an exchange so that the children have the opportunity to run around and go climbing so that they get more emotional balanced and power out themselfes. When the kids come to kindergarten after the weekend we can always see at their actions and behaviour if they had been outside some time at the weekend or just being at home.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yes!! This is so smart. Kids aren’t outside enough at all in American preschools.

  • @a.riddlemethis795
    @a.riddlemethis795 2 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    My silblings were 4 and 5 when we came to Germany. Few weeks after they entered Kindergarten, I caught them speaking in German with eachother while playing. It was 32 years ago and their Kindergarten was even not very good, but they absorbed the language like a dry sponge :)

  • @SiqueScarface
    @SiqueScarface 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    German Kindergarden is heavily based on Friedrich Froebel's ideas about the development of a child. Even the word "Kindergarten" was coined by Friedrich Froebel, and so was the idea that childhood is fundamentally different from adulthood. Thus children should not be treated as little adults. He also observed that children learn by play, and so he invented educational toys like the wooden bricks.
    Albeit I am living in Austria, I still want to add my experiences, as Vorschule also exists in Austria. At the place I am living, the elementary school and the kindergarden share the building. At the time my daughter turned five years old, the principal of the elementary school attempted an experiment with a "pre-class", a class mixed of children who were old enough to go to school, but still behaved very kindergarden-like, and children in kindergarden-age, who might be able to follow school already. After half a year, for each child, either in that pre-class or in first elementary class, there would be a decision, if the child would stay where it is for the remainder of the school year or switch either from pre-class to normal class, or from normal class to pre-class and then join a normal class in the next school year. My daughter was part of that experiment, but for some reason directly entered a normal class at age five (but turning six a few weeks later anyway), and apparently managed to follow school well enough not to switch to pre-class after half a year.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      So cool! I love learning the historical origins of our cultures and way of life. Thanks for sharing this!

  • @oceanstaiga5928
    @oceanstaiga5928 2 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    About the emotional stability and behavioural problems: I saw that when I lived in South Korea. I always wondered why there are extremely high depression rates amongst students. Well a big part is living in a highly competitive society where when you fail your studies it’s really hard. But more so, academics are the most important thing to the majority of parents and so they start academics real early too, teaching English even in pre-school age. There is a lot of bullying in Korean schools and I am convinced it is caused partially by skipping the emotional and social development at a young age just to pressure more academics. It’s really crucial to teach that a lot when you think about it.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Ooo very good points about how it's done in Korea. I hate competition in schools - each of us has different gifts and for many, academics isn't one of them.

  • @pigoff123
    @pigoff123 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    My brother hated kindergarten. He used to lie across the radiator and cry that he wanted to go home. He finally made one friend an it got better.

  • @susangutperl4937
    @susangutperl4937 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    As far as I see it most Kindergartens do some type of „Vorschule“ program during the last year of the kids. But in the last decades the more strict and structured “school like” approach from the past has been dropped for a more discovery oriented one. Kindergarten teachers try to instill basic life skills and schools also ask for not getting too far ahead with numbers and letters with the kids, at least not if they’re not interested it.

  • @imaginareality
    @imaginareality 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I remember watching a short news story about a preschool or daycare center in the US that had video cameras in every room and the parents could log in at any time and watch what was happening. I was so shocked by that! As somebody who has worked in childcare, this sounds like a super stressful workplace if you are being watched every second. Also, some of the preschool practitioners talked about how they use this to manage challenging behaviours, basically telling the kid "You mom/dad can see what you are doing. Just wait until they come to get you in the afternoon, you will be in so much trouble". Which I think is not appropriate at all.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Oh wow, yeah, that’s awful! Threatening a kid like that. The problem is the teachers are using old fashioned punishing techniques, instead of redirecting the child and addressing the root of their unwanted behavior. Many parents in the USA still spank their children, which we totally disagree with.

    • @TheRealChaosQueen
      @TheRealChaosQueen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Learn by fear... Doesn't really work.
      Because the effects wear off once the reason for fear is gone.
      Those people will learn to do forbidden things secretly, and will break the rules once they feel like no one has the power to punish them.
      If they do things right, they sometimes do this only to avoid fear or seek praise, not because it just is the right thing.

    • @petercollingwood522
      @petercollingwood522 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Given the nature of US society I have a hard time understanding why anybody would choose to work in a position where they are responsible for kids at all.

  • @miadifferent7306
    @miadifferent7306 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    The birthday song is by Rolf Zuckowski (in case you didn‘t know). He is a children‘s song writer from Hamburg. I grew up with Songs in the 80s and 90s. I‘d say his songs are quite wholesome, fun to sing along to and still apply today. There are even songs about Traffic trafic education that I still remember today. 😁

    • @carinab.1923
      @carinab.1923 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      We also learned all the months of the year with him. And I can't get the melody out of my head now "Heute kann es regnen, stürmen oder schnein, denn Du strahlst ja selber wie der Sonnenschein" :D

    • @Kloetenhenne
      @Kloetenhenne 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      My sister is 32 and there won't be ONE holiday season baking session with her without his children's christmas songs 😂

    • @CHarlotte-ro4yi
      @CHarlotte-ro4yi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Kloetenhenne I came here for exactly this comment 😅 just yesterday I told my mom I feel ready to listen to “Dezemberträume” again for this season (I am 25 btw 😅)

    • @Kloetenhenne
      @Kloetenhenne 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@CHarlotte-ro4yi I am 25, too 😂 our baking favorite is "Winterkinder" 😂

    • @swanpride
      @swanpride 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      They are also a stable for Traffic education and for Christmas time. Really, knowing his songs is an important part in most German childhoods.

  • @rebeccat9389
    @rebeccat9389 หลายเดือนก่อน

    TBH, I appreciated updates when kids were young not because I was trying to watch them. I was trying to watch the teachers and give them the sense that we were paying attention.

  • @anitapenkert389
    @anitapenkert389 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    When my eldest daughter was in kindergarten (14 years ago) the kids that celebrated birthday brought some muffins, cake etc. from home.
    When my other children entered kindergarten, they changed this to grouping the "birthdays" of the month and the kids decided (as a group) which out of a list of 4 treats they would like to have to eat, e.g. "Pizzabrot", Zitronenkuchen, Nudelsalat. Then the birthday kids went to the supermarket the day before and bought all the ingredients. The next day they would cook / bake the dish in the kindergarten kitchen. The change was probably due to lack of personnel (always the same problem around here) and hygiene ordinances that no homemade food should enter the kindergarten, but I am not sure.
    But they would still all sing "Wie schön, dass du geboren bist" (love that song, always brought tears to my eyes!).
    My kids loved kindergarten years and still speak about them with nostalgia. The freedom of choices was great for them, so they could choose to go outdoors, use the "Puppenecke", the "Bauecke", retreat to the calm and space-y "Glitzerecke", sit down with a book in the "Kuschelecke" (a cosy place with lots of pillows), listen to stories when the "Erzähloma" came (some local elderly ladies) and they always looked forward to the special action days when Police or Fire Brigade members would show up or when all toys were stowed aways for "Spielzeufreie Zeit" - translates as "no-toy weeks" when normal rules would be lifted and they could camp and play on or under the table, play with boxes, do woodworking etc.
    They certainly had a good time although there is always room for improvement.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Oh wow, I just love how they would buy the ingredients and make the food to celebrate the birthdays! What a good practical life lesson! It’s learning math, social skills, and so much more.

  • @mucxlx
    @mucxlx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Just let her watch Cartoons in German or "Die Sendung mit der Maus" to learn the language. Thats something a lot of Families watch together on Sundays. You can also watch it from the Mediathek of the channel. Im not sure when it airs since i dont watch TV. But i watched it too when i was young and a lot of german kids watch it.

    • @Spikebhaal
      @Spikebhaal 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Damn "Sendung mit der Maus" is still being made? I watched those almost every sunday same with "Löwenzahn" best shows for Kids to learn new things.

    • @M--001
      @M--001 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Spikebhaal No nonsense explanations of cool topics. Die Sendung mit der Maus was the best. I'd take a well done understandable explanation of how casting steel works over anthropomorphised talking hasbro merchandise any day.

  • @betinamyrick5842
    @betinamyrick5842 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I am a Erzieherin in Berlin and I run a Tagespflege with my kolleague. We have 10 children between 1 and 5 years old.
    Preschool for me are the years prior to school, not just the last year of Kita.
    Play opens the world to the children and is their job. If you watch them you see when the children open their window to learn about letters, numbers or whatever.
    That is our time to provide information to them, not beforehand. Social emotional development is the most important. Self-reliance, resilience is crucial development to a child.
    It is also important to learn to make their own choices and to live with the consequences. They must know to stand up for themselves and they must be able to say no and stop to others and not rely on the grown-ups opinions. For instance if I want to change a diaper on our two year Olds, I will ask for permission and if they say no I'll have to come back later. Of course it happens and they pee thru but this way they learn to tell me when it is the right time. We will not force them into doing things but we will make the consequences clear...
    Okay you don't want to eat, this is your hunger you will have to deal with. Or no rain pants, your pants will get wet and we are not going back for wet pants....
    Of course it is done when the child is ready to understand what consequences are. We work our way up to making own decisions. Trust your children in their abilities.
    As Steiner once said
    In Ehrfurcht empfangen, in Liebe erziehen und in Freiheit entlassen.
    Have a good weekend.

  • @avalon4612
    @avalon4612 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Your videos are always so fun to watch! I surely can imagine how scary it must have been for Ella going to the Kindergarten with not knowing if she could handle it.
    I‘m from NRW and we had to pay for the Kindergarten and yes, the amount depends on your income. In Düsseldorf for example which is just half an hour from where we live, you don‘t have to pay for the Kindergarten at all. So it really does depend in which city you are.
    I have two kids and my younger doughter who is now 11 years old, used to hate going to the Kindergarten. I remember one day I brought her to her class, I told her to put her Hausschuhe on and she was so angry, crying and didn’t want to stay. And all of a sudden she took her shoe and threw it after the Kindergarten teacher. I was so embarrassed and told the Kindergarten teacher that I‘m sorry for the bad behavior of my daughter. Than she asked me for a talk in the office. And I was surprised what she told me. Instead of being mad at me or my daughter she told me that my daughter is a very emotional person and she doesn’t know how to handle all these different feelings. I should be patient with her and be calm in situation like this. I didn’t expect the teacher saying that and was very glad that she seems to exactly know „her“ kids in her class and is able to assess my child.
    You all have a nice Sunday!
    Greets from Moers

  • @melanieclouston5533
    @melanieclouston5533 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Kids adapt so fast to new environments. We moved to Austria when our son was 4 (my husband and my stepson are from Scotland and I am from austria).
    Our son didnt speak any german when we first moved but within 3 months he was more or less fluent. It still took some time for him to figure out the artikels der, die and das and some other basic grammer but day to day talking and all he needed for kindergarden was fine after 3 months.
    He is now 8 and he is speaking the same local dialect as all the other kids.
    Also living in the countryside was new for him as we moved from Edinburgh. I didnt expect it to make such a big difference as I grew up here and I didnt know it any different. But it had such a big impact on his developement and he got so much more independent as he has much more freedom now.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wow, fluent in three months! That wasn’t the case with Ella. She’s not fluent yet, but we are getting there.

    • @melanieclouston5533
      @melanieclouston5533 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@MyMerryMessyGermanLife we were very surprised too. However we had the bug advantage that most of my family speaks no or little english, so he was confronted with the language most of the day.
      I am sure you all will get there soon and latest in school it will be second nature for Ella 😀

  • @imaginareality
    @imaginareality 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    We have behavior problems in our German Kitas as well. I worked in an inclusive Kita that catered mostly to families from a low socio-economic background and to children who learned German as an additional language and we had a few children who really challenged us. But maybe the difference is how we deal with it? Because of how play-based and open everything is, you can find individual solutions for each child and redirect them to another activity. For example, we would encourage children to go play outside if they were too loud and wild in the classroom. We also had quiet areas where the children could go to and relax if they needed some time off from all the noise and chaos. Throughout the week/year we offered many different activities and projects but almost all of them were voluntary, so if a child wasn't interested in something or struggled to sit still, they could simply choose to do something else.
    Edit: Vorschule was like you said: the kids got pulled out once or twice a week for about an hour. This was in Schleswig-Holstein.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Yes!! I didn’t really say that in the video so I’m glad you wrote that the difference is how the behavioral problems are handled. Instead of redirecting the children or have them go get out their energy outside, or cuddle with them when they’re sad, they get punished. They have behavioral charts in classrooms and every kid knows who the “bad” kids are. I disagree with their disciplinary policies SO much. It’s almost always the children that come from chaotic, unstable and abusive home that are the ones who misbehave. When they are the children that need the most love and support.

    • @imaginareality
      @imaginareality 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@MyMerryMessyGermanLife I agree completely. Punishment is often the last thing these kids need! (Clear boundaries, transparent rules and consequences are important but it needs to be done in a caring, empathetic and age appropriate way).

    • @momostarkloff7284
      @momostarkloff7284 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      first here in saxony preschool is handled the same. sometimes they group kids from more groups together, instead of just having 3 of one group. they usually have a special teacher coming for the learning. ours went to „numbers land“ and „letter country“ and the first approach is usually very actively. they draw on grounds and hop on their letters.
      also instead of calling it punishment i would call it consequences here. it’s comes with the childs self awareness and self worth. with the social learning there always is trouble and problems, and sometimes redirecting is not solving it. however good kita erzieher will have consequences as last resort, not punishment. like if you cannot share a outside toy like a bike or such and create accidents all the time, they might be banned from it for a bit. however most tries to have the kids find solutions for their problems first. i think most german parents will help their kids voicing their issues to the kid, like „if you are mean to me, i really don‘t want to play with you anymore“ - „if you do not share your toy after a time, i‘ll find something different to play and not with you.“ and with the age groups the same is lived by the olders and younger can just copy. also the olders usually help with the conflicts and provide good solutions. basically kita should be the kid having a ton of siblings for the day. they learn they need to voice what they want but also listened, to others. so yeah big emphasis with social skills.
      and yes eingewöhnung plays a big part in the kid feeling fine in the group before it‘s left alone. it‘s even a law here. a kid is not allowed to be left from first day. the time is not set, it‘s a very different for each kid and parent, but by law you get at least a 4 week period, most kitas make it longer if necessary. because of a change in kita leitung, pregbancies and of course corona on top our little ones had 6 different teachers in her group the last 1,5years. that is very rare and most kids are struggling. so they try very hard now finding a much more constant way.

  • @geneviere199
    @geneviere199 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My son is half American - he is not a kid anymore, he is 30 - but I am a single mom for all of his life. I atleast when he was a child and teenager had a very good contact with his father and family who we visited each year for some weeks in my holidays (it helps when you have 6 weeks holidays each year). I tried to get him to be able to speak or understand both languages from the beginning - English was always a part of our life as I learned him a lot of words, read him easy English stories, we sometimes banned German during dinner or when driving in the car, I learned him songs and rhymes and heard just English music and often English radio - and of course visited the USA (North Carolina) - but until he was about 7 or 8 he just understood English very well but did not speak. That suddenly started but when it did he pretty soon was very fluent with it and had a Southern accent. You did not recognize that he was a German. I had some books and games in both languages - like e.g. some of the Little Critter series. Maybe the boys would enjoy to read her easy books in German - but you might look into some series of German audio books - Here is a list of German audiobooks
    Benjamin Blümchen
    Bibi & Tina
    Bibi Blocksberg
    Bob der Baumeister
    Bobo Siebenschläfer
    Conni
    Der kleine Drache Kokosnuss
    Maybe you could thing about a Toniesbox - in my eyes it is expensive but it might be easier to handle for kids. You can switch the language to English and I think they have started to export their idea to England/the US now, too, and have downloads in English. tonies.com
    And yes, kids are different. Some love to go to Kindergarten from the first moment - others do not. I did not really have the choice as I was starting to work again very early - at the beginning I partly worked at my old workplace in the morning (he was at a daymom then) - in the afternoon I worked at my parents company until he was 3. I changed workplace when he was 3 and was working fulltime in Frankfurt (a one-hour-trip each way every day) - he got into Kindergarten where he spent the mornings and was at my Mom's house on the two afternoons she had off and at my day mom the other days. My son loved it everywhere - but he never wanted to leave the place he was at - in the morning our home, at lunchtime the Kindergarten and in the late afternoons my Mom or Daymom - and it needed always a lot of persuasion to get him from one place to the other.

  • @twinmama42
    @twinmama42 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I did not go to Kindergarten as a child in the 60ies as I was very lively, unruly, and more of a tomboy than the girl I was supposed to be. So the nuns in the (one and only) Kindergarten in our German suburb denied me admittance after just one day of trial, which was a burden on my mom. But I had a very good Italian friend living next door. He was one year younger than me and we stayed a lot at his place or on the quiet residential streets nearby. I picked up some Italian and though I never had a formal education in the language, I get along quite fine when I'm in Italy (e.g. when we made our "exam trip" to Rome in grade 12, I figured out how to obtain cheaper bus tickets by just reading the information about it at the bus stops (only in Italian).
    When I was 5 and a half, we moved into the house of my mother's cousin, who took me under her wings. We played board games and she read books to me. My favourite was an edition of Grimm's Fairy Tales from the 1930ies with lots of gorgeous drawings, all printed in the Gothic Fracture scripture. When I started school half a year later, I could read Gothic Fracture but not Latin script, lol. In the end, I turned out quite well.
    One of my sons is an Asperger and after his diagnosis (which he only got when he was 12 years old, despite already having problems in Kindergarten and regularly visiting a pediatric psychiatric facility since he was 7) he once a week visited a special group for autistic children age 6-18. In the beginning, the older children (and children who got their diagnosis earlier) helped him, later on, he helped the younger children, which helped him to develop self-esteem. The concept of mixed age groups has many advantages, even in a school environment. There is a "Laborschule" (in Bielefeld as far as I remember) where they have mixed age classes with good success.

  • @celimalu
    @celimalu 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I'm loving your videos, thank you! I've been living in Bayern for 6 years now (coming from Argentina), 4 kids about the same age as yours, and I am having the same impressions you have, I am "shocked" by the same things -especially by the fact that they are SO independent being so young!!
    With regards to your question, our Kindergarten is exactly the same as what you describe (play play play, and they take the "Vorschulkinder" for a couple of hours a week as you explain). And it´s free for Vorschulkinder; younger ones pay but no much, according to salaries.
    Parents are invited to "Frühstuck" once a month (only 3 are allowed each time) where they do the same things the kids do on a regular day. Pia (my 4 yo) sometimes comes home and tells that "xx was really loud today and was making some "Schmann", but never that this XX was punished in any way. Yes they play in the garden every single day, no matter the weather. And I love the way they end up eating "healthy"; they kind of suggest you give them fruits and vegetables, and Vollkornbrot (when I was a kid, everything was about cookies for our "Brotzeit")
    But what I absolutely love the most about my days here is that I've definitely learned to enjoy and love (and live) nature! A M A Z I N G!!
    Keep enjoying life over here and thanks again for your videos -which I send to my friends back home so that they can get a glimpse of my life here! xx

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Oh that’s right! We completely forgot the part about them eating healthy. Huge difference to the experience we had in the US!

  • @ramona146
    @ramona146 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So cute Ella speaking german

  • @Lisa7905
    @Lisa7905 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I was an Au Pair in America the last 12 months. In february my hostfamily took jobs they got offered and also moved their whole family to Germany (not far from where I grew up actually) inkluding their kids (3 and 5 y. old). None of them spoke German really and I found it very interesting when they told me, that the 5 year old had a hard time at first, because she set a similar pressure on herself as Ella, while the 3 year old coped with the situation pretty quickly. He, as a kid much closer to the age of learning how to speak just knew, that he can communicate with other kids without really talking. The older one had to relearn that first.

  • @gastonkawitzke3272
    @gastonkawitzke3272 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    In former times Kids were sent directly from Kindergarten to 1st. Class. Kids that were supposed to have problems in the first class were sent to the Vorschule. But most Kids learn writing and maths in first clans.

  • @RalfSteffens
    @RalfSteffens ปีที่แล้ว

    When my stepdaughter was in elementary school (six years old), we put up an Advent wreath with real candles in the kitchen. I had an adult conversation with her: "When you leave the kitchen, always blow out the candles. Fire is dangerous. A single candle can set the whole apartment on fire."
    When I came home from work some days later, she was very excited: "Mom and her friend left the kitchen and left the candles on. I blew them out immediately."
    I was so proud of the girl.

  • @seorsamaclately4294
    @seorsamaclately4294 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I remember, when my mother was in a care home, once a month the kids from the Kindergarten directly opposite from the home, would come in with self baked cakes or cookies.

  • @Melisendre
    @Melisendre 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    My daughter loved Vorschule. She loved to be seperated from the smaller children in a small group and doing special stuff. My son didn't like Vorschule. He wasn't interested in drawing lines and creativity. He wanted to play or learn academic skills like maths, reading and writing, but they didn't. So he learned maths from his elder sister when she did her homework. For my children in the '90 Vorschule was only once a week for an hour. It depends on the Kindergarten and only on the region or state.
    The best of german Kindergarten and Vorschule is that there is no pressure. The only pressure comes from parents which are frightened their children don't learn enough in Kindergarten to manage elemantary school.

  • @nordwestbeiwest1899
    @nordwestbeiwest1899 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I usually answer in English but this time I do it in German. Ihr macht das hervorragend mit eueren Kindern und wenn ich ehrlich bin , bin ich sehr beeindruckt wie ruhig ihr manchmal bleibt , Respekt .Macht weiter so ich schaue gerne euch über die Schulter wie ihr das so bewältigt in einen fremden Land für euch .

    • @kevinmcfall5285
      @kevinmcfall5285 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      It hasnt always been easy but it is a great experience! We are starting to feel more at home now.

  • @OliverUlpts
    @OliverUlpts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I was in Kindergarden right after the unification of Germany. It was hard as a kid. A lot of punishments. This hopefully changed a lot nowadays in east Germany. Now that I am becoming a father I want the best experiences for my kid.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I’m sorry you had that experience abs I do hope it’ll be better for your child.

    • @ilovepotatoesforever9818
      @ilovepotatoesforever9818 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think you could attribute this to regional differences. Bavaria and Baden-Wurtenburg are different from each other for sure but very different from other regions due to history and culture.

  • @susannabonke8552
    @susannabonke8552 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    You can be so proud of Ella how she managed the start. Sweetie. At 5 year old I passed holiday in Denmark.. when going to a playground the small ones go without words, by showing...

  • @moonhunter9993
    @moonhunter9993 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    when I was a kid in Germany, vorschule was in the afternoons. during the day all kids still played together..

  • @ilovepotatoesforever9818
    @ilovepotatoesforever9818 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your explanations of child development and how kindergarten is in your Kreis in Bayern is just like Waldorf kindergarten culture.

  • @inesdrube7356
    @inesdrube7356 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I love your videos and sharp observations about our school system (Kita included(. I am a German mom of two living in Saxony and your Kita experience is exactly the same as mine here in Leipzig. Keep posting, it helps me appreciate our system so much more to hear you guys reflecting on it.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      There are so many good things about the way it’s done here in Germany!

  • @zwergnase1989
    @zwergnase1989 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    A lot of parents are not aware that Kindergarten teachers in NRW (possibly in all of Germany) are supposed to create a file for each child in their care that describes the child's development (progress reports, pictures of the child, drawings and crafts by the child, etc). Parents have the right to receive this file at the end of the child's time in Kindergarten.
    I am a primary school headmistress and previously worked at a school with many foreign students. We often asked the parents to share this Kindergarten-file with us because (if the Kindergarten actually did a good job of it) it would give us a comprehensive impression of the child even if the parents did not have very advanced German skills.
    Generally, sharing this kind of information when starting school is essential so that each child can begin this new chapter in their life with the best possible conditions. Many parents hide "bad" things about their children because "the Kindergarten teacher is prejudiced and doesn't know my child like I do". Even if that is true, primary school teachers will notice if your child is capable of doing something even though their file says they can't.
    I have worked with a lot of teachers that were frustrated and overworked but every single teacher I've met wanted "their" children to succeed. We take pride in their small and big accomplishments. We delight in their lightbulb moments. If I teach a child the same thing 10 different ways and it still doesn't understand it, my first thought is how I can improve my teaching. Whether I have done enough. Of course not all teachers are the same and there might be some genuinely horrible ones out there but they certainly aren't the norm.

    • @heinv.frohnau505
      @heinv.frohnau505 22 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Das sollten mal die Menschen lesen, die behaupten, Lehrer würden zu wenig für ihr Geld tun . Es ist eben nicht nur die "Arbeit am Kind" sondern eben auch die Dokumentation die dazugehört. Die sieht nur kaum jemand...
      ---------------------
      People who claim that teachers don't do enough for their money should read this. It's not just the "work on the child" but also the documentation that goes with it. Hardly anyone sees them...

  • @azMD108
    @azMD108 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    For me it would be really interesting to see how kevin is doing at his new job in germany. Like how is it to work in germany and is it any different as in the us? Is their any language barrier? Maybe for your next videos.

  • @neophytealpha
    @neophytealpha 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I miss the hikes and bicycle rides I used to go on in Germany. Through towns, backroads, and woods.

  • @HowIamDriving
    @HowIamDriving 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    When I grow up (Germany, 90's) Kindergarten was just a day care. And there was no Vorschule. It wasn't necessary - it was the job of the regular school.

  • @imaginareality
    @imaginareality 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    Glad to hear that Ella is settling in! It can be really overwhelming. I think sometimes people underestimate how stressful it is for young children because we seem to not take young children all that serious in general. When I was a kid, I only moved to Germany from Switzerland and even though I could understand most of what was being said, I didn't speak a single word for weeks. (That's actually a common thing, it's referred to as a "silent period" in second language acquisition).

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      That’s a very good point - how we don’t take children seriously and understand that they can be quite scared and have complicated emotions as well.

    • @user-sm3xq5ob5d
      @user-sm3xq5ob5d 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@MyMerryMessyGermanLife I think part of that is that we as grown-ups know how to face problems and the kids don't. So to step in their shoes and see how somethng looks like a mountain to them while we regard it as molehill. But I guess as parents you know that very well.

    • @silmuffin86
      @silmuffin86 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      yes, just because children learn faster than adults do, it doesn't mean it's easy for them!

    • @annikaParnda
      @annikaParnda 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MyMerryMessyGermanLife Maybe it´s also that we as adults have already learnt how to handle our emotions, what they mean or how we can "undo" them. As a kid it must be so scary having maybe feelings or emotions youve never felt before but no coping mechanism to make you feel better.....

  • @ErklaerMirDieWelt
    @ErklaerMirDieWelt 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I grew up in Hesse and my last year of Kindergarten was similar to what you described. We learned the difference between left and right, how to use scissors and glue, how to tie our shoe laces - stuff you need to know for school.

  • @iuliarupa5538
    @iuliarupa5538 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Our daughter was born in Austria, but we only speak romanian at home. SO when she started kindergarten it was a very similar situation... she cried every morning for the first many months, but she was happy when we picked her up, saying she had a very nice day. But starting with the second year, she is excited to go to kindergarten, she does sooo well with the language, and her bestie is also a foreign girl. They communicate with one another in a mixture of both mother tongues + German + few English words here and there... so sweet.
    I thought I would never hear her say that she misses kindergarten, but those days finally came 😀

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Awe yes, you understand how it was for us very well, then! We had exactly that same experience. So glad that your daughter is happy now!

  • @jerrihadding2534
    @jerrihadding2534 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    I deeply appreciate your profound respect for your children as children and intelligent human beings. My kindergarten experience caused me to refuse to learn to read or write, largely because of my total distrust of my teacher who humiliated the one Latina in our class (the rest of us were the “right” color - white) in front of our entire class and quite specifically in a racist way. Naturally I didn’t understand racism at the time, but I did know that the teacher was being completely unfair. And when I say “refuse”, it was a quite conscious decision on my part. I rejected utterly any support she attempted to offer me and this support was primarily focused on learning to read and write. I spent two more years with bad teachers, one of whom who told me that I was not to answer questions in class because I spoke “baby talk” - whatever that was! My education was finally rescued when my third grade teacher turned out to be a genius in human relationships. She was compassionate, kind and very observant, plus she offered us “hands on” learning experiences. Also, I was taken under the wings of the girl who became my lifelong friend. She refused to accept that I could not read, introduced me to the public library and the “Blue and Green Fairytale” books and that was that. By fourth grade I was reading a book a day. Don’t worry, I still got plenty of physical activity in the forms of swimming (I purely LOVE to be in water) and games like “Red Rover, Red Rover let .... come over” or freeze tag.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Oh how very sad - I’m sorry you had that experience. This just goes to show how teachers play a profound role in our confidence and personal development.

    • @susannabonke8552
      @susannabonke8552 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you so much for your openness. I personally think it's what we need Most. Lots and lots of fellows go through hardship. But by being quiet the suffering is passed from one generation to another, as in my Case. By opening Up the issue loses its threat and literally the defining power over our lifes. Glad you found a good teacher in the end.

    • @jerrihadding2534
      @jerrihadding2534 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Why bless you Susanna! I totally agree with you. Sharing truth is an enormous part of any healing process.

  • @brabel0401
    @brabel0401 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    It’s interesting to see how similar kindergartens in Germany and Austria are. I live in the south of Austria and both my kids were born here. In Austria many primary schools also have a “Vorschule”, which is a sort of transitional year between Kindergarten and 1st grade. My daughter started school in 1st grade but had a lot of trouble adapting to the new school routine. After a few weeks and talks with school teachers, it was decided that she would go to Vorschule instead. It was the best decision we made - even though she was 6,5 she just wasn’t ready for 1st grade and this additional year made a world of difference. My son started school this year and he’s also attending “Vorschule”.

  • @aureliamillner592
    @aureliamillner592 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I lost my first two teeth in Kindergarten because the "Kuschel-ecke" (A part of the room with matrasses on the ground, blankets and Stuffed animals to just relax or nap during 'free time') was right next to a metal Heater. A boy grabbed me and purpousfully knocked my head against it like five times before the teacher even came looking. He got a stern talk, his mother was called and he had to apologize. thats it. My mother came too, asked me if I was fine, I truthfully said yes, so she left again xD
    No one ever got into real trouble in Kindergarten here, you get corrected and they explained to him, why it's wrong. Punishment is at no use if the kid doesn't understand why its bad.

    • @DieAlteistwiederda
      @DieAlteistwiederda 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      A boy cut off a chunk of my hair in Kindergarten. Same thing happened and he wasn't allowed to use scissors without a Kindergärtnerin around for a while afterwards because he had tried to cut people and not just their hair a few times before he succeeded to do it on mine but that was about it. My mom gave me a haircut and both of us kids survived. He was later in the same elementary school class as me too.

    • @hannajung7512
      @hannajung7512 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Also: punishment is actually not allowed, as it is an act of violence and the right to a violence free upbringing is a constitutional right in Germany since 2004

  • @annaluhrs1818
    @annaluhrs1818 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Our daughter is 19 months and in Kindergarten since about two months. When we pick her up, the teachers sometimes tell us if anything special happened that we need to know, eg that she didn’t like lunch and might be hungry, and sometimes just a glimpse of what she did during the day. We can also ask if we have specific questions. In our Kreis Düren childcare is free for all kids except for families with especially high income. We only pay for food that they get there.

  • @furzkram
    @furzkram 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    You're doing such a good job with your videos.
    I was just like "What? That was ALL?" when reaching the end, when I realized it was already 30 minutes.
    I could still have watched another half an hour without noticing the time passing by.
    I often think "man, please get to the point" in others' videos, and start skipping forward - that NEVER happens to me with YOUR videos, I just realize. In yours there's so many points - and I still can't get enough.
    Anyway, it's always a pleasure to see - or hear about - the progress your kids are making.
    But I also love to notice the progress YOU, the parents, are making. You might not be aware of it that much, but to me it seems you happend to find exactly the spot where you're fitting like a hand in a glove - by location, by culture, by just anything. I seriously think you've nailed it.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Oh I'm so glad our VERY long ramblings aren't boring you! Thank you so much for your kind comment and for your support of our videos. Yeah we really have found the perfect town, neighbourhood and country for us for now. We are very blessed.

  • @annikaParnda
    @annikaParnda 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I just finished "workin´ moms" on Netflix and I don´t know if that was exaggerated but at one point the 3 year old son gets suspended for cutting someones hair off or biting or something. And watching that I just send a small prayer to the kindergarten god that this wasn´t actually how things were being handled in the US :´D

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That’s not far off, actually! 😰😰

    • @jessicaely2521
      @jessicaely2521 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Academic preschools yes it is. The play based preschools no it's not. There are different kinds of preschools throughout the US. For example my nephews preschool was a combination of structure based and play based. His preschool said "you are doing this right now." Play with blocks, play with dolls, play outside, sing, etc. It wasnt allowing kids chose an activity based on their interest. Not all kids are cut out for allowing them to chose their activity. My nephew needed direction and so did I. If we didnt have direction we would have just sat there.

  • @Winona493
    @Winona493 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You became a real video artist!!! Whenever I see your footage, I want to become a member of your lovely and awesome family!!! Cherish what you own, but you already do, no complaining. 😂

  • @Ati-MarcusS
    @Ati-MarcusS 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Happy to see you all enjoy our country

  • @malvernufntigp394
    @malvernufntigp394 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for the insight ❤

  • @MhLiMz
    @MhLiMz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Excellent video about German Kindergarten, and nice to hear about the differences to American Kindergartens / preschools. I'm kind of hoping you are going to do some kind of analysis between American elementary school and German Grundschule.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yes! That’ll be for next week. Glad you enjoyed this one! 😍

  • @jurgenporn1867
    @jurgenporn1867 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Simply amazing, well done everybody.

  • @maschne9962
    @maschne9962 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I worked as an Au Pair in England and I was so surprised that my 4-year old already lernt how to write and read. However, the school day was really long. I picked my hostchild up at 4 and he always fell asleep in the car. Then he had a short break and after that it was homework time. It was torture... I hated to pressure him so much because he was tired and just wanted to play but I had to make him do his exercises. After dinner he had TV time but the actual playing time was cut so short. I didn't like this education system. I also came across those studies you talked about. The German system is far from perfect but at least children can have lots of playtime

    • @juliebrooke6099
      @juliebrooke6099 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I agree with you the school day is longer (usually about 9 until 3) but most mothers work so the children would have longer days outside the home anyway. At the age of 4 and 5 they will be playing most of the day with a free choice of what to do but with short group sessions ( no longer than 15 or 20 minutes) to introduce letter sounds and maths skills. I have never heard of homework for that age of children, other than reading a short book or a few flash cards with their parent if they want to. Most English reception classes have access to outdoor areas too so children can choose to play outside, whatever the weather. I think in the past English schools would have been more formal but that is not the case now.

    • @maschne9962
      @maschne9962 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@juliebrooke6099 oh okay thanks for telling me. So it wasn't official homework then but 'homework' his parents wanted him to do...and since I was the Au Pair I had to do it with him every evening. He had to read, practice the alphabet and had to do some calculations and practice writing. Really glad to hear that they have playtime in school!

  • @PursueWhatMatters
    @PursueWhatMatters 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Love your videos! Such great information and it is fun seeing your family live and explore Germany.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hi!! Thank you so much! We enjoy your videos, too. They are very well done!

  • @teacherella1338
    @teacherella1338 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    In Germany there is a plethora of concepts of child learning. Most institutions (Krippe, Kindergarten, Hort) center on pedagogic concepts that enable the children to learn through play and experience of their environment. Academic learning concepts usually come into play in the year before the kids enter school. I am very glad that at least in this instance, childcare is modern and based on scientific facts (unlike learning in the school system).

  • @jessicaausborn
    @jessicaausborn 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I always enjoy the ambience scenes at the beginning of your videos. You have such a great eye!

  • @mastex5575
    @mastex5575 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks for your video it made me smile all the way.

  • @emelienivala2328
    @emelienivala2328 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Thank you for your analysis! Childhood education definitely is a very complex matter, with so many pros and cons to different systems. I just quickly wanted to add my personal experience from a similar, playbased education system here in Sweden. Over here, kids are in prescool until the year they turn 6, there is then one year "vorschule" (förskoleklass) and then first grade starts at age 7. Our system is also built on the idea of children's need to play, and I completely agree, because for most children that does seem best. But there is a downside. Because we are so heavily focused on the fact that children are supposed to play, there is very little recognition of some children's need for more advanced intellectual stimulation. I was very passionate about learning and playing intellectually from a very young age, and longed to start school from the age of 2. My parents tried to ask for more stimulation, but were told that I "needed to be a kid and play freely". What we're forgetting if that is our only narrative is: why do children play? Well, children play games that stimulate their growth and understanding of the world! All that academic stuff WAS my way of playing, it was the way forward in my cognitive development. I wasn't interested in the same games as the other children because that wasn't stimulating for me anymore. Unfortunately, I didn't get to "start learning letters" until the förskoleklass, by which time I had already been reading independently for over 2 years (as you can understand it would take many years before I got to come to school and learn something new instead of doing endless repetitions of things I already knew. A situation few of us adults would ever accept to be placed in!) This has had a longlasting negative effect on my life.
    While I am in no way opposed to a play based system (I would have been very bored in the situation that your son described from his american, academic preschool too!), the most important thing is that we always keep our minds open enough to see the children that don't fit in the same box as most others, and never let one sole practice be the answer.

    • @grandmak.
      @grandmak. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      very interesting and so important to be aware of !

  • @nickatbasel
    @nickatbasel ปีที่แล้ว

    Brit living in Switzerland since 2001 here - stumbled across your videos recently. We're slightly different in that our son was born in Switzerland so he's been in the Swiss system from the beginning. Nevertheless, as foreigners it has been an adventure for us learning about the Swiss education system - which has many parallels with your experiences in Germany. The children are expected to get to school or kindergarten by themselves - no parents dropping them off in cars. Massive emphasis on doing "risky" things - for example children taking turns to prepare the "Znüni" (morning snack) using sharp knives to chop vegetables. Fortnightly walks into the forest with the teachers where the children take their pocket knives, trim sticks, light a fire and cook a sausage.
    Hats off to you and the children for embracing German life, not taking the easy way out with international school.

  • @oemi2801
    @oemi2801 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Enjoy Kindergarten as Long as it lasts. My daughter is Now 13 and in 8th grade. ONCE they are at the Gymnasium, Fun is over.

  • @Bumi-90
    @Bumi-90 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    In my Kindergarten, Vorschule was kind of optional. I was interested in writing so i was shown how to write my name, etc. but I never learned math in vorschule, because i wasn't interested. So I could have learned about math writing nature, or take part in sport aktivitys, but every "Event" I could also just go outside and play if I wasn't interested at the moment. But this was for my whole time in kindergarten.
    Tldr: My Kindergarten provided the possibilaty to learn a lot, but every kid was free to just go and play if they like.

  • @H8MACHINE1
    @H8MACHINE1 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    15:13 hahaha^^ I´ve exactly the same Doorbellsound and when it rings in your Video my Dog starting to bark :D

  • @sushi777300
    @sushi777300 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I've learned so much from your channel 😊

  • @JRSofty
    @JRSofty 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Another lovely video. It's so interesting to see how other parents deal with the change in life. I think that even to a point some Germans when they are parents for the first time have to re-learn what Kindergarten was like, as it probably has changed since they were little. There are times when I miss when our children were at that age, and there are more times when I'm so happy that ours are out of that age. So enjoy it while you can :D

  • @LeyCarnifex
    @LeyCarnifex 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Your description of Ella turning around on her little scooter to shout at you about how she doesn't need your help and she can do things on her own reminds me of how my parents always say that one of my first words was "alleine" (colloquial form of "allein" = alone) bc I wanted to be able to do things on my own, without help xD

  • @gemmaluescher-verseckas1243
    @gemmaluescher-verseckas1243 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Forgot to add that I live in Switzerland - we also have the forest prekindergarten

  • @maschne9962
    @maschne9962 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You are such a lovely family. I'm glad that you are adapting so well! I watched some videos yesterday in which you talked a lot about Schnitzel being your childrens favourite food and I had suddenly such a craving for it :D had it today for the first time in a really long time and I loved it so much. So thanks for the reminder :D

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yummmm...Schnitzel! Thanks so much for watching and for your kind comment!

  • @thesewsewapprentice
    @thesewsewapprentice 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My mother, brother and i moved to the uk when i was 12. He was 14. Our English wasn’t great. My brother was the type to just chat away in broken english not caring if he made mistakes. I was more shy and didn’t speak much for about 6 months until i was fluent enough to not make mistakes.

  • @wora1111
    @wora1111 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Near peer mentoring: Now that you mentioning it I noticed that very often our daughters explained things to each other. And it went both ways: Older to younger and the other way around.

  • @enemdisk6628
    @enemdisk6628 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Love your video editing

  • @franhunne8929
    @franhunne8929 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    In cities where there are very full classes and very different social groups some problems do arise in primary schools - kids who haven't as much chance to run around freely like yours have, watch too much TV (which is not always age appropriate, some parents just do not take good care, some can't as they work) - and take their energy back to the class-room where it disturbs when you have 30 kids.

  • @Danisachan
    @Danisachan 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I'm 33 so it's been quite a while since my kindergarten time and it's propably quite outdated ^^ I also grew up in East Germany. And in East Germany after unification there really was no pre school. All kids learned their first letters and numbers in first grade together. I don't think any of us have ever written a word before that, because kindergarten was all play based. My first grade teacher was a sweet older lady and she would place the letters of the alphabet all over the classroom and let us find them if she asked for one specifically. They are such nice memories to me! And yep, no lag in our developement in learning reading and writing in first grade for the first time 😉 I absolutely loved it actually! I've been a big book worm ever since all my life!

    • @helloweener2007
      @helloweener2007 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      "I'm 33... I also grew up in the DDR."
      2021-1990= 31. So you were grown up with 2 years?
      I think you were to young, you were not in Kindergarten in the GDR but in the Krippe.
      You can't compare what happened before 1989, between 1989 and 1990 and the years after reunification.
      Preschool in the GDR was more about practising skills for handwriting and observing. Like going out and watch a construction side from the sidewalk and back drawing pictures about it. I remember that. Was 12 when the wall came down.
      Preparatiosn for school were:
      - to rhyme (can't remember)
      - solving riddles (can't remmeber)
      - painting with water colour and crayons (we did this)
      - counting with counting sticks (I remember the sticks)
      - name and compare quantities (can't remember)
      - first handwriting practise (I have done this)
      - traffic education and education for tidiness and cleanliness (we have done this)
      - painting, drawing, crafting and knead with Plasticine (did this more often in the last year)
      - practise tongue twisters (I can't remember)
      - observing something and telling what happened (yes, like the example with the construction site)
      - singing (we did this)
      virtuelles-ddrmuseum.de/seiten/ddrkindergarten.htm

    • @Danisachan
      @Danisachan 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@helloweener2007 You're right I totally confused that. I was born in the DDR but my kindergarten time and so one was in East Germany. I will correct that.

  • @MhLiMz
    @MhLiMz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I like how you sometimes played with the depth of field in your ambience shots at the beginning of the film.

  • @juliacorssen4188
    @juliacorssen4188 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    When I went to Kindergarten many years ago at the age of four, I startet to stutter. As a single child it was too much for me. My parents decided I should stay at home for another year and than I actually was READY to go.
    Giving Ella her time is the right decision, each child is unique. Still many children have working moms...
    they have no other choice. Love your videos

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes we are very lucky that we can take our time, since I can work from home and part-time. Not all mothers can do that.

  • @robopecha
    @robopecha 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    aww i love your channel! i don't even have kids, but many of my friends do and i am always interested in what environments we grow up in and how it affects us, back when i was little and nowadays. and how it differs in different cultures and what has to improve in the future. i notice that most people don't even reflect on these things, they just want their kids to be somewhere while they go to work and that is it. you guys have so many interesting thoughts and pick out interesting quotes from people, i love it. i am just agreeing on so many things. :)
    (btw i am german, in berlin, and around your age i guess)

  • @psy1883
    @psy1883 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Alles ist so wahr. 💖
    Wir feiern die Geburtstage in der Kita auch so ähnlich.
    Jedes Kind bekommt eine Krone in seiner Lieblingsfarbe. Wir schauen uns Fotos der Kinder an und sehen, wie sie sich entwickelt haben.
    In der Mitte des Kreises liegt eine Sonne mit 12 Strahlen (für jeden Monat ein Sonnenstrahl) und das Geburtstagskind geht mit einer Weltkugel entgegen des Uhrzeigersinns (so wie sich die Erde um die Sonne dreht) um die Sonne herum. Nach jeder Runde wird eine Kerze angezündet und wir schauen ein Foto an mit dem entsprechenden Alter. "Schau mal, da warst du drei Jahre alt und hast gelernt, wie man mit der Schere schneidet, wie man eine Kerze anzündet und wie man schaukelt."
    Außerdem darf das Kind sich eine Perle aussuchen und auf seine Geburtstagskette hängen. Jedes Kind hat in der Kita eine Kette mit so vielen Perlen, wie es Jahre alt ist.

  • @danielw.2442
    @danielw.2442 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    ...a gorgeous cat! 😉
    Like always, it was fun to watch and I really enjoyed the video.
    Mostly because it's quite a bit educational for me aswell. 👍
    Wish you a great sunday.

  • @stellarina1605
    @stellarina1605 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you for your interesting videos ☺️ I’m an kindergarten teacher (Erzieherin) in Germany so it’s really interesting and beneficial for me to see the differences of the American and the German system :) I also wanted to say as of your last video the kindergarten where I work is open for children of the age of 4 months until school entry. But the youngest children i ever experienced getting into kindergarten were 10 months old so nearly nobody brings them so young as just these few months.

  • @ThePixel1983
    @ThePixel1983 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love to hear these stories!

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      😍😍

    • @ThePixel1983
      @ThePixel1983 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@MyMerryMessyGermanLife It's especially good to hear about difficulties and how you and your kids overcame them. I just came back from a scout weekend (I'm in France) and we as three leaders who grew up in three different countries are currently dealing with a complex situation with our group of teenagers. It's fascinating to see how we tackle these challenges wether we're 4 or 40.

  • @joachimlutz4946
    @joachimlutz4946 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    A nice game at a childs birthday is a so called "Schnitzeljagd" (paperchase) when all the kids have to follow chalk-arrows on the street or ground (or other arrows for example on a tree or a traffic sign) to finally find the treasure. This could contain several sweets and little toys.

  • @mathildewesendonck7225
    @mathildewesendonck7225 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Oh, I feel so sorry for poor Ella, that must have been a tough experience for her in these first weeks in Kindergarten. But it’s so great to know that she is doing well. I love your channel, although I don’t have children and never had to think about these problems.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah it was tough. Keeping her at home for those first few months was the right decision for her. ❤️

  • @kathi_LG
    @kathi_LG 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    We love your videos so much … Love from Munich ❤️🥰

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you! We are actually in Munich right now for the weekend!

  • @CarokonekoSubs
    @CarokonekoSubs 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    When I was in Kindergarten they had a voluntary pre-school option, which I did try out for a few times but the caretakers realized I was getting bored and they let me go back to the other group again. My parents had already taught me how to write and read a bit so the pre school stuff was just too easy for me. I’m glad I could easily switch back to playing for another year instead of having to do boring worksheets. However, I do think teaching kids how to read, write basic stuff and doing tasks quietly is important to make first grade a bit easier.

  • @Leejaygolf-finland
    @Leejaygolf-finland 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hello dear, very beautiful video, Before covid I visited Germany every years,
    Love to be there .
    Have a nice day and stay safe.
    Lovely family

  • @vbvideo1669
    @vbvideo1669 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sehr schönes Video! :)

  • @geneviere199
    @geneviere199 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Maybe another idea to explain that Ella had her problems was seeking attention and getting time with you alone? As you told the older ones needed more attention than usual because of the new schools. And I guess before moving to Germany she probably got the most attention being the youngest and the only girl.

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah that might’ve been part of it! Our attention moved from her to her brothers as we helped them do their work at home during lockdowns. It was quite a difficult time.

  • @petertauscher1443
    @petertauscher1443 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Hi, great video as always. I would like to see a video about Kevins work experience in Germany, about the life/work balance, how it is with his collegues, etc…

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Okay sure, we could touch on that. Only thing is that he works for an international company so the culture of it really isn’t German and he speaks in English.

  • @ra_jcat6607
    @ra_jcat6607 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It's okay, my 5 yr old son still speaks mostly English in kindergarten, we don't pressure him and he absolutely loves going to kindergarten even if he doesn't understand German that much yet...hugs from 🇦🇹

  • @Terkina__
    @Terkina__ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Your wonderful channel was recommended to me and I enjoy your content. I am from a part and generation in Germany where we didn't have English. I learned it myself over the past 3 years. It really opened my world. And I think it is the same for you and your kids. I am 50 now. It's very interesting to me to see/ hear all the differences between the countries. 💓

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Oh very cool! How did you learn English? That’s amazing you’ve done it in 3 years. Thanks so much for watching!

    • @Terkina__
      @Terkina__ 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MyMerryMessyGermanLife I watch and listen a lot of vlogs or live streams here and over on Twitch. Most of the content I watch is in English nowadays. I also joined a community 3 years ago which speaks English the whole time during conventions or on VRChat, no matter where we are in the world. I like English a lot which makes it easierto learn. It is spoken so much softer than Getman and easy to learn. (In my opinion at least) ... I still make lots of mistakes tho, but I am getting better and better.

  • @flummoxedflushed
    @flummoxedflushed 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I would like a video about the kids' progression in learning German and how the boys are getting on with school. And if they are up for it, they could tell us themselves in German?

    • @MyMerryMessyGermanLife
      @MyMerryMessyGermanLife  2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yes we will be doing more videos speaking in German soon! If the kids are up for it - we only want them to be on TH-cam if they want to. Our oldest does not want to be filmed so naturally we respect that.

  • @KlausZanetti
    @KlausZanetti 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I`m sure you realized before moving to Germany, your life will not be easy in a foreign country. Especially with four kids in a different age and different requirements.
    But you are managing so many "problems" in your own way, in a good way 👍and without losing your humor (as far as we can see in your videos 😄).
    And I´m also sure, in a few years, Ella will say: "Mom, Dad, this have been problems your you ? Because i can`t remember to all these things, this must have been "peanuts" for me !
    Don`t worry about me."

  • @0luisakara0
    @0luisakara0 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    In our region of germany kindergarten is play only - the entire time. some kindergardens offer playful english-lessons but in general the children are free to play and develop their skills the way they feel like it. i loved kindergarden, it was such a warm place for me. like a second home.

  • @Al69BfR
    @Al69BfR 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    What are the games kids today are playing on birthdays in Germany vs. the US? We had for instance games like „Topfschlagen“, „Der Plumpsack geht um“, „Blinde Kuh“ and „Stille Post“. At least the latter has a counterpart in the US: „telephone game“.
    Perhaps this is a thing that could be interesting for families moving to Germany, what are the typical games for groups of kids they are playing in the US vs. Germany. 🙂 I know there are similar games for kids in those two countries like tag (Fangen) or hide and seek (Verstecken). And while watching Squid Game, there were also games for kids that were similar to German kids games like „Red light, green light“ in Korea is equivalent to the German „Ochs am Berg“. But what are the differences? The Games that are unknown to other countries? 🙂

  • @xxx_phantom_xxxw_t_a9479
    @xxx_phantom_xxxw_t_a9479 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hello from Switzerland, the beginning of your video surprises me with the topic that kindergarten sometimes costs something.
    From my point of view, that is not very wise, especially since they are not necessarily obligatory, which means that if necessary, what has been missed in the 1st class has to be made up for, which in my opinion is a step backwards. With us, they still have to attend kindergarten for 1-2 years and it is basically free of charge like public schools. That makes perfect sense, including learning the basics, such as writing names, learning numbers (probably 0-10), etc., especially since children of that age are very curious/willing to learn.

  • @mariexhh8934
    @mariexhh8934 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank your for the video! I grew up an Hamburg and Vorschule ist quite a bit different there. It is not part of Kindergarten, but Grundschule. You have a classroom in the building of the Grundschule and a teacher. You go there every day for the entire school year (for me it was from 8am to 1pm I think) like a Schulkind and get prepared for what it's like to go to school. Afterwards I got picked up by my kindergarten teacher and spend the rest of the afternoon in kindergarten until my parents picked me up. It is not mandatory to go to Vorschule, but for some kids, e.g. who have an international background and need to learn German, or kids whose birthdays are later in the year and thus seem too young to go to school yet, it is recommended. I really enjoyed Vorschule and when I entered first grade in Grundschule I already knew my way around the school and had an easy start there.

  • @melanieberlin5684
    @melanieberlin5684 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    In Berlin, there is no obligatory Vorschule. Depending on the concept of the Kita, they can offer it and some Kitas I know actually do. But typically, there is no school-like, academical Vorschule. They focus on cutting, holding sizzors the right way, following all types of lines, holding a pen the right way. Some Kitas I know work based on the "Situationsansatz" (situation based concept = pick up an interest shown by the children). So if the kids want to learn about letters and numbers, than the Erzieher would pick it up. My eldest son went to a Kita with Situationsansatz and in his last year he learned how paper is made (papyrus paper, "our" paper), they learned about how writing was invented (starting with cave painting till nowadays what you learn in school), they went to a printing factory... It was very interesting. Another project they did, was creating an alphabet for their group room (in the Kita it is always called group room since they are not in school and therefore not in a class). They heard the sounds and had to come up with words that start with that sounds. Then they drew a picture of that word. Long story short, as an Erzieher (which I am too btw) you should aim for main things. All things academic come with school.

    • @matzek.3220
      @matzek.3220 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Interesting 🤔, did they completely remove the Vorschule (unless the KiTa offers something along the lines) ?
      When I grew up in Berlin the Vorschule was a class in the Grundschule with less lessons per day than in first grade and iirc the concept was something between play based Kindergarten and regular classes of Grundschule. But that was decades ago 😅...

    • @melanieberlin5684
      @melanieberlin5684 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@matzek.3220 It is completely removed. I don't know when exactly it happened, but my oldest son is turning 13 very soon and he did not attend Vorschule, so it was done before 2014.