CULTURAL SHOCK or returning to Russia after the US / Why Russians don't smile?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ก.ย. 2024
- A year ago I went to the United States due to the exchange program. It was a cultural shock for me because people there were very smiling and polite, while I was used to more reserved behavior in Russia. After 8 wonderful months in America I returned to my homecountry and then I had the reverse cultural shock. My compatriots seemed to me extremely sad, dull and rude. In this video I'm reflecting on my American experince and I am trying to understand the differences between Russian and Western cultures. Why Russians don't smile? Are they really so rude to strangers? I'll try to answer these questions in this video.
#Russia #USA #smile
About myself My name is Natasha, I live in the Far East of Russia in the city of Khabarovsk, but originally I'm from a small town Spassk-Dalny. Currently I'm studying Linguistics in a university in Khabarovsk. I like languages and learning about different cultures. On this channel I'm making videos about life in Russia, our traditions and my traveling in Russian cities. Subscribe to my channel, and let's explore Russia together!
My Instagram: / natsadv
Support me on Patreon: / natashasadventures
As an American, I don't feel the smile to strangers is fake. It's just a way of being polite and friendly to others. We are raised that way.
Were.
The mask is killing it. And those that promote it. All of them.
Same. Asking "how are you?" is not just a greeting to everyone. Some of us actually do care and want to know that you are well. To me, small talk is not something I feel obligated to do. If I like someone, I show them that I am pleased to see them by stopping what I am doing and acknowledging their presence. The conversation is not the point. Its the attention and gift of time that matters.
Being raised in the American South, I was raised to be at least sort of open and friendly until the other person gives me a reason not to be so.
@@whereswaldo5740 But wearing the mask will let us and those we love live to smile again. Refusing just prolongs the necessity.
And, believe it or not, people can still interact while wearing masks. Our lips aren't the only signal that matters.
@@whereswaldo5740 the smiling culture in the US is due to the economy relying on the service industry. Yes most manufacturing jobs are outsourced. So what's left for Americans to do are service based jobs, which requires smiling as part of their occupation requirement. You can see retail sales person smiling at you and talk shit behind your back as soon as you leave. That means the smile was not authentic, but a tactic to make you buy their product.
When people would ask my Grandpa how he was doing, he said “Fine, unless you want to know the details”! I thought that was a great answer.
I steal this answer, thanks!
@@valentinaruseva8727 Grandpa would be pleased!
im 56 and i do that all the time, but i dont ask if they want the details i just give them. but mostly to make the person regret asking. only to people i dont know
I often tell people how I'm doing even if they don't ask
That's so funny! I had a patient once that would always say, "If I were any better, I'd have to be twins"
You were in Minnesota, if you were living in Mississippi or Louisiana people will tell a complete stranger their entire life story. That would have been a real culture shock
Agreed. In my experience, that also applies to most of Texas, Kentucky, Tennessee, West Virginia, Virginia (except near DC), North Carolina (except Raleigh and Charlotte), South Carolina, Georgia (except Atlanta), Alabama and Florida (except Orlando, Tampa and Miami).
MARVA too Damn cold in Minnesota to talk for that long. 🥶
Dude come to India, people here would tell you all about their existence.
Don't cha know!!!
So true
As an American I had similar experiences. My job transferred me to Hong Kong and I already had a functional level of the Cantonese language. On one of my first few days I was in a bank facing the entrance door. A guy abruptly entered the door and I looked up to see. My eyes locked with the guy's eyes. I gave him a polite smile and returned to filling out forms. I was aware that people around me were looking at me suspiciously. One person asked the guy if he knew me and why did I smile at him. He said he didn't know me and maybe I was some kind of pervert. Nobody realized that I understood what was said but I thought "Can't these people recognize a civilized polite smile". Later I realized that people of Hong Kong just don't smile at strangers. They can't. It is just too crowded to smile at everybody who crosses your path.
Later I transferred to the Philippines where every one smiles at everyone, everything all the time - more than the Americans. Anyone who doesn't go around smiling all the time is considered a deeply emotional troubled person.
You can even study the kind of smile , , I'm a pilipina, , smile is our tagline as resilient happy people, ,. We don't plant grudge
A smile also means “I see you” it’s an acknowledgment. You are not invisible.
So true! One more covid problem is that people can't see your smile through the mask.
A real smile occurs naturally. You don't have to think about doing it. It just happens.
@@joeh858 Not true I very rarely smile even when I want to unless I force it everyone is different. I smile a lot as an American, I see it as a cool part of our culture even if people don't always mean it, if you give them a genuine smile and compliment you will see them actually smile, a fake smile is only a small step away from a real one.
@@jakemon4550 uhhu
As a russian, I find this comment interesting:) If you ever go to Russia, please know that even if I don't smile, I probably still see you, just don't want to bother you by -in a way - intruding into your personal space.
I'm English and had an American friend. It took me some time to understand that "what's up?" just means "hello" and I didn't need to tell him what was up.
Well England has 'you alright?' as an equivalent.
German has Wie Gehts and hopefully I'm not wrong.
Can’t understand why it would take you some time to understand “what’s up” 🤷🏻♂️What’s up with that?
@@ericbrandon8699 I am an 88-year old American. "What's up?" is still unfamiliar to me! I rarely hear it because I am not among young people in a casual way, like passing an acquaintance on the street. When I was in college in the early 50's(!!), I had to get used to passing a lot of former high-school mates. The standard greeting would be, "Hi! How are you?" As with "What's up", you would surely not start telling anyone how you were. You could just repeat, "Hi, how are YOU?" The answer would be nothing; greetings were over as you walked on, or, sometimes, like now, just "Fine."
I am still, after years of hearing the response, "Good." or "I'm good" feeling a little repulsed by it (That's too strong. Can't think of a better word right now.) "Good" refers to your behavior. You are a good person. Of course I do not show my dislike of that answer; I just respond, for myself if asked, "I'm fine, and you?" or "Fine, thanks" It's enough. My favorite response, is "Great!" no matter how I feel. And that does make me truly feel better. (Aside: I'm asking myself why I am writing an essay when no one will read it anyway, or should they do so, I will never find the response. Oh, well. I enjoyed sharing ...or not ...my thoughts. It took my mind off into just this moment, nothing more.)
I'm American, 32, and still not used to this😂
I'm a British/Indian Londoner who has lived in the USA, (close to NYC), for 20 years now. I absolutely love the fact that American's are so friendly. At first, I was shocked that you could be walking down the street and a passer by will say 'hi'!! I have become just like them and I believe it has enriched my life immeasurably. I never pass by someone without saying hello or asking how they are. In fact many people that pass my house and see me gardening, have become good friends. This is a magnificent characteristic of the American people and I think they genuinely want to know how you are. It does not feel fake to me at all:)
@Dale Hemme You give away your agenda when you mention George Soros, a Jewish man who has nothing to do with the political agenda of US broadcasters.
Nevertheless, I think your comment has merit because I sometimes find myself surprised to see how well people seem to get along after all the discussions of racism. This is a complex topic. The behavior that characterizes it can be hard to see. A woman used to come to our house to help us take care of my 99-year-old mother for a few hours a day. She related that when she brought her children along -- as we encouraged her to do -- no taxi would take them from the train station to our house. We liked this woman very much, and we had fun with her children when they came along. But the taxi drivers, to mention just one example, would not carry them as passengers!
@Dale Hemme agreed, it’s not reality. Of course discrimination exists but in real life it’s quite rare and often comes from police (which is not representative of the population). As a non white person who’s traveled through the south multiple times (and all over the US) they’re much nicer and hospitable than people are here in CA.
You must be living among European Amers- certainly NOT among Asians. I've tried that, & nothing!
@Dale Hemme wait so your saying america has never had a racism problem?
It’s a London thing, or any big city.
I love smiling at people because it is like giving a gift, like silently saying that you appreciate that person’s presence. Love the video! Thanks a ton Natasha
Yes. Please don’t think the smiles are fake.
As long as you don't expect or demand the same from others, there is no problem with that.
@@torquebiker9959 Agreed
Hello Natasha,
My wife and I visited Russia back in the time when President Putin first became your leader. We flew into Moscow on Swiss Air. Stepping off of the plane and walking into the Moscow airport there was a huge difference. We had read about the differences in our cultures, so my wife and I knew what to expect from the people that we would meet in Russia. It seems like everybody knew that my wife and I were American. I figured it was the countenance on our face. We are Texans through and through. Walk around with a goofy grin on our face, always trying to make eye contact with the people that we pass on the street. The people in Russia didn't seem to be sad to me, but more solemn. We stayed with a Russian family in Moscow and they were actually quite friendly. Although when they guided us around Moscow, acting like our tour guides, they took on the more solemn role that we were used to seeing in Russia. But in their apartment we laughed and laughed.
To me it is just cultural differences. Not that big a deal from someone from Texas. None of this stopped us from adopting our 14-year-old daughter from Russia. She was 13 when we met her and she seemed to smile all the time here in Texas. She came to visit us here in Texas with a group from her orphanage. All of those children seemed bright-eyed and happy. My daughter is now 31 years old, married and happy, smiling like a goofy Texan.
I figure if you cannot smile on the outside you can at least smile on the inside. Even on your video, I can see that happy glint (twinkle) in your eye beaming outward from your eyes.
I am now an old man. You spoke of my country with a smile, I am very proud that you spoke of an american smile with a smile on your face.
By the way, my daughter's name is Natasha.
I still have great memories of your country and always will. Times may be tough, but I will always have those happy memories of Russia. I saw no difference in our peoples, just different cultures. There is plenty of room for differences.
Keep a twinkle in your heart.
Man, I loved reading this - thanks for sharing.
Just if you have a chance read about charles chaplin quotes about smile and the effects on others and our own health and mood ☺️
So nice to read this🙂
As a South African I have to say I got pretty depressed living in Poland for 3 years having to look at all the grinning faces.
People always ask me, "Dusty, why are you always smiling all the time?"
And I reply, "That way, when I get old, all the wrinkles will be in the right places!" 🙂😊😄😁
Russia sounds like an introvert's paradise.
Looool. Russia, I'm cooooooooooming....
Haha! I'm an American with a lifelong Russian expression on my face. I actually had to learn to smile at strangers, because if you are working with the public that's what you have to do! I was always embarrassed by my mother, who was an extreme version of the smiley American. 😀😄🤪
@@diane9247 Yeah, I always think I'm smiling and then I look at the photos and I'm not...
Introversion is not the same as being anti-social.
@@Spetet Very true. People do not get it but it is true.
The smile isn't fake. It's a gesture of goodwill.
It's fake in that it doesn't mean the same thing as a "normal" smile. Not in that it's not meant well or anything
Everything becomes worthless if it's done inflationary
@Elated Thumbs - Yes, I think "superficial" may have served her better in her description of what she meant. While the smile in this case is likely a sincere expression of friendliness, the sentiment is probably not deeply held. It is in this case largely a courtesy. A smile can cover a lot of ground expressing friendliness, tenderness, affection, amusement, silliness or even enmity. She does well with English as a second language, but probably needs more experience with it to appreciate some of the nuances. My purpose in commenting was to explain to some perhaps less experienced with English what the true nature of the gesture is.
@@uhinger - Courtesy is not worthless.
in terms of "fake", the real question is does the smile lead to feelings of happiness or does the smile reflect feelings of happiness? Americans are optimists, we hope for the smiles to lead to mutual feelings of happiness. In that sense, it is genuine. However, we do fake it sometimes. Especially when we've not yet had our morning coffee. amirite?
Hi Natasha, I really enjoyed your video. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I am a Native American Indian born and raised in California, just north of San Diego. I am one of those Americans that smiles and talks with everyone I encounter. I never realized how odd that was to people from Russia. My mother used to say "smiling is a contiguous happy moment you share with other people." Keep smiling Natasha 🤗
Very true about the smile. I had the reverse culture shock when I returned home to the states after being in the Soviet Union in '84. One thing though that I'll never forget is the Russian tradition of hospitality. The Russians may not smile on the street but on the inside, as a guest, you are treated so well, spoiled even. It is a wonderful thing. Russians have a very warm and welcoming side.
may i ask where you visited? 💗 i’d love to visit russia myself
true. especially simple folks on russia s countryside
@@brittany6430 I spent 4 months in St. Pertersburg in 1984, February - May. It was a study abroad program and we traveled to Kiev, Tblisi in Georgia, and Moscow. A life changing experience. It was, of course, the Soviet Union then. Things have changed so much since then. I"d love to go back and visit.
@TcZ I gotta update my profile pic, It's about 10 years old.
I agree with this
I was at an intersection one warm day with my windows rolled down. I let out a good sneeze, and a Brothuh two cars over belted out a robust, "Bless you!" I had no choice but to be blessed. Made my day.
I worked in a call center and the person next to me sneezed loudly... the person I was talking to said "Well bless someone" so I turned to my co-worker and said -"my caller says bless you"" -Both of them laughed and I know my coworker smiled the rest of the day! She'd chuckle and mutter something about being blessed by a caller. And I smile now when I think about it!
The honesty in these videos is priceless
That's a fact. We need more people in the World like Natasha
but its still her own prespective...
Very true and her attitude is excellent 👍
✌👏👏👏👏👏bravo
I’m Canadian, we are generally happy and even too polite by most other countries’ standards. We can literally spend minutes holding the door open for others, or apologizing for the most minor things. Go to a grocery store with us, and if walk in front of someone to get through an aisle, “sorry”. If you get in front of the shopping cart by accident, “sorry”. Also see, “it’s all good”, “no worries”, “have a good one”, “cheers”, and tons of talk about the weather 🤣❤️
Canadians are famous for being endlessly polite and apologizing for things beyond their control! "Sorry that it's so cloudy today. Eh!" Welcome to Canada.
Omg, [Letchworth state park New York.] Canadians....So good looking....SaR'è : )
My grandmother was from Eastern Europe & I recall her saying "Americans smile too much."
When my parents visited Eastern Europe they noticed no one smiled. This was 1970. They thought their lives must be miserable.
When I was in Denmark winter before last I had a Dane tell me that I smiled too much. I asked her "Compared to what?" ...as I smiled at her.
I was showing a Hungarian friend pictures of my son’s wedding and there was one of me, my husband and daughters surrounding the bridal couple. My friend asked me why we were all smiling!
@@jeffdelaney8934
That was back in 1970s, how about now ? I think they still don't want to smile.
I would love to smile to people even with the mask on
This 👉😷 but actually this 👉 😊
Thats so funny. 🤣
You were fortunate. They don't call the American Mid-West "The Heartland" for nothing. People actually are friendly and happy to help you, and for the most part, their smiles are genuine.
Your media aren't honest they lie through their shiny porcelain ed teeth ha ha
@@anthonymitchell8893 it's not the media, son. This is from actual personal experience. And as for our teeth, we have to pay cash for our dental work. What is your excuse?
I moved to Texas from Los Angeles. Very pleasant surprise to have strangers smile AND wave hello as you drive by. I will add though that in The Great California Central Valley (mostly rural) and surrounding foothill towns are loaded with very friendly people. In general the people who live in large cities are guarded and as you get closer to rural areas the people will be much friendlier. At least that's my experience.
Is that before or after they show you their gun?
@@julierauthshaw8556 oh sent you salty ha ha you also have to pay for every medical procedure under the sun I'm glad I live in a civilised country
About 15 years ago I was doing consulting work for a highly specialized company near Washington. One of the clerical staff was a young Russian woman (her Russian husband had a job with a biotech company). Olga was very efficient, very dedicated. As almost all the work the company did was for foreign countries the staff spoke many different languages, and Olga was hired because of her native Russian. The receptionist was a Latina who was very gregarious and outgoing. Another clerical staff was a young Japanese woman studying at a local university. Anyway, one day Olga asked the owner of the company why, when the receptionist was away, she was never asked to take that position. He said, "Olga, you're a great worker and a really nice person. But any clients that come in will think this is the worst place in Washington to work because you always look like your mother just died."
Thanks for the story. I worked at a place that the front office lady was so friendly people actually liked calling us because they got to speak to her. Just hearing her voice put a smile on your face. You could tell she was smiling THROUGH the phone!
@@ssjwes - Too true. One of the first things you learn when working in radio is that people actually see you smile when you talk.
So you have to smile to sell, the product or yourself, to make your life easier. We are so accustomed to It, but our smiles are most of the time fake, a psycological program.
@@willisteccanella7567 - Its very hard to fake a genuine smile. People are not stupid - they can see right through fakery. Sometimes when you’re tired you have to fake a little, but if someone smiles back that fakery quickly switches to become real.
LOL
I’m from Canada and I smile at everyone I pass and it makes me feel good knowing that I might be making someone feel good even if only for a minute. A friendly face is always nice to see!! Smile sweetheart smile! Be kind to one anouther and help each other!
Yeah, I'm Australian. I like to frown as people walk by, not because I'm sad or angry but to remind people that they have bills to pay and that their responsibility as adults have to be maintained or they could lose their jobs and families at any moment.
Same!! Us Canadians tend to be almost overly polite, but I’m proud of that!
Don't forget to smile at dogs, cats and babies.
I'm from North Carolina and I currently live in a van after having to have open heart surgery thus losing my job - There's no help in America whatsoever for hard working people who go down to things outside of their control.
I'm working on moving to Canada, it is a long and difficult process but I know that this place is going downhill quicker than people realize and that it's only a matter of time before more and more people are trying to get out of here. I spent two weeks in Alberta and I could not believe how much more friendly people are there than in North Carolina. People in the south are /not friendly/. They are bitter and usually physically/mentally unwell. I am trying to get far away from them.
I can not wait to join the civilized world, where citizens of free countries are considered to be worth helping when they need it most. I refuse to be cold and tactless, like so many of my countrymen.
a friendly face can conceal and evil heart and a blank face can protect a good heart
I know a girl here in Florida who's Russian and apparently adopted America's smiling culture. She said because of how smiley she's gotten, every time she goes back to Russia to visit family, people now think she's a tourist!
😂😂🤣
Lol
That's funny.
😂😂😂❤️
Lol 😂
Interesting how much I can relate as a Chinese that’s lived in the US for 10 years. Ever time I visit China I experience the same reverse culture shock. Chinese people don’t smile at strangers either and I think for some of the same reasons you mentioned why Russians don’t do it. But if you smile at them you’d usually get a smile back, at least that’s my American husband’s experience. I remember one time I had to take a photo for my Chinese ID, and I was smiling at first while taking the photo, just like I would in America. But the Chinese government employee who was taking the photo scolded me to not smile, LOL. I was so shocked why I wasn’t allowed to smile… Here in the US I can smile as much as I want when taking photos and no one stopped me… As for the American people and friendliness, I absolutely love it here! I really love that people are so kind, polite, sweet, happy, and genuinely wanting to help. I love my new country!
Im from Texas and I didn't smile in my drivers license photo and every time I get carded, they always ask "were you mad that day?" lol
Glad to have you here. Health and happiness to you and your family.
Pues para un latinoamericano, los estadounidenses y europeos no sonríen tanto, son fríos y no son para nada fraternos... Todo es cultural
If you smile in your ID photo, do you also smile every time you pass the subway photo identification check? It's better for your ID to be your normal expression.
@@Banmuyuan Not a bad thing to have a smile be your normal expression is it?
You're a sweetheart, and sweethearts lighten up the world everywhere.
Down boy
Yo what are u 50 Jesus
@@HeyhitmeBAM 😂
@@iliaperez7290 So what if he is. That’s a genuine complement and truthful statement. Grow up, lol.
Soy boy
Many people (including me) actually do care about the wellbeing of total strangers. I talk to strangers all the time. I have no idea how they will react and although sometimes it isn’t pleasant, most times it is at least interesting. I care, really. No fake! Cheers from western Canada.
PS I love politeness.
It's very important for me to leave person I interact with in a happier state then before. Especially people such as cashiers and customer service staff who work hard all day dealing problems most of the time. I approach with a smile so they can relax for a bit every now and then. And it is genuine because I truly think my problem is not worth their frustration. From mid Canada.
Good manners are the grease on the wheels of civilization.
Bless you brother. Its wonderful to know that there are people who feel like you. 💙💙💙 Rich in Seattle.
My wife and I were in a small Russian village and took a photo of some goats in a yard. The owner came out and started yelling at us until he realized that he had known my wife when she was a young girl there. At that point he invited us in for tea. Cold to strangers, warm to friends.
Very Slavic, in Poland there is a proverb that says: ""A Guest In The House Is God In The House" or in Polish: "Gość W Dom Bóg W Dom",
Actually one finger, two-finger, or three fingers, means different things one finger means" how you doing?" Two means " How the family?" Three fingers means " tell them I said howdy!"( course the last one is reserved for people you actually know)
@@jessesmith8388 never lived in a country in communist control have you? He did(the old man) strangers can be dangerous they could be Secret police (KGB in this case) so being cold and distant becomes a survival trait
" you leave my girlfriend alone "
Not the American way ,we are friendly to everyone.
I'm from NYC and was dating a Russian woman in the late 90s who was in the USA as an art teacher. She and I met at a party and we were quickly attracted to each other and we started dating immediately. We were on the way to the park one day and we bumped into this couple visiting from Colorado. They both smiled at us and started a conversation asking for some advice as to restaurants in the area where they can have a quick snack before heading to the theatre. The encounter lasted about 15 min with me giving some suggestions of where they can go for a quick bite and some small talk about other things they can do in the city. My Russian girlfriend was mostly listening and smiled here and there throughout, but after we parted ways with this couple from Colorado, she turned to me and asked me if I've met them before. I said no and she looked at me like I was crazy hehehe.
I'm britis
I’m also American, and that’s one of the things I love about Mexico. Many people there are llike that. I have had many wonderful and interesting conversations with complete strangers all over their beautiful country.
She was attracted to your fat . wallet maybe ?
that's why she left you
That reminds me of a Polish woman I used to live with in the UK. She used to complain that her English colleagues were "obsessed" with what she did at the weekends. It was a total culture clash. Monday mornings most British workers will ask you what you did at the weekend as small talk.
Young lady. As a 50yr old American man. I've throughly enjoyed seeing your country & your impression of mine. Well done videos!
Stranger alert
@@xvzf115 welcome to the internet.
Where did you Go?
Pissed off you old pervert ~Stewie
@@williammorgan9622 me?
As others have mentioned, we smile at other people whether we know them or not to show that we are friendly and not hostile towards them. It is the same here in The UK. It’s also good to smile at a stranger as they may be having a bad day and your smile may cheer them up.
I'm Irish and we too are very sociable and talk with strangers easily. I went to Warsaw with a Polish friend and he felt he had to warn me not to smile at people, or be friendly to strangers. It's a big change to Ireland.
We have a joke that in Ireland every road has an old man who waves to everyone who passes, whether he knows them or not.
In America we call that old waving man, the country. Everyone in the country side will wave to you, especially if they're old. 👋😊
Ireland sounds wonderful. I hope to visit there one day.
Considering how many Americans are of Irish descent, I'm not surprised by this at all.
I live full time in a suburban area relatively close to a major city, but have another place that is very rural, very far away from big cities and there we pass each other on the country roads and wave, even if are perfect strangers. Is that way where I grew up too, so I really like this back country area because its still that way
I’m from the south in USA and I remember when I was a little girl and my grandpa waved at another man driving down the road. I said, who was that, Papa? And he said “I don’t know”. And that’s how I learned the country wave 😂😂😂
As an Irish American, we are still the same way. lol.
But I will say we share the superficial topics, the deepest secrets of our souls stay locked up deeply and you don’t get to see that unless you earn it.
My experience of Russian and other Eastern Europe people is that they don’t chat and make small talk but if you are lucky enough to earn their friendship you can have no more affectionate or loyal friends.
I am Russian and I like the fact that all countries have different mentalities and people behave differently, which makes the world diverse and interesting. I've lived in Japan, for example, and they don't smile either. Only the service staff smiles there
Согласен)
Smiling is a cultural thing, after all. But this nice girl is telling it affects her personally, emotionally, and that is very interesting, (to me at least)
I think all countries outside of North America and some other western countries are like that.
@@rust44 cuz they don’t have weed🤪🍀
@@rust44 In Western Europe it is very common to smile to everyone.
Love this girl, wise beyond her years. God bless you, young lady.
seconded
Yah, that's just what I thought too, very mature and intelligent, hope she goes on to great things!
She has a Patreon and PayPal link in the comments. Let her know how much you appreciate her.
@@michaeltaylor5451 Thanks! Good to know.
Yeah, unlike some people we can find, she's gained some perspective because she doesn't live in a bubble. An exchange program is a really great way to see the world through a different lens.
Lol how true! When I moved to the US from Russia in the ‘80s, my face literally hurt for a while from having to smile all the time, especially at school. My facial muscles had to readjust. You’re right about the perception of sincerity as well. It took a long time to shift perspectives.
I’ve always heard that it takes more muscles to frown than to smile. I grew up in Mississippi and my dad smiled everywhere he went. It wasn’t fake at all, he genuinely loved people. I’m glad I inherited his attitude and I raised my sons the same way.
must be awesome to have a dad like this, or at least having one at all)
@@nepashas
I was blessed. He was also a dad to my friends who didn’t have a dad.
Wanna see one difference between the US and the the U.K.? Ask each where a frown is seen. Americans will usually say it’s the mouth. Brits say it’s the eyebrows. Technically the Brits are correct.
ughhh I wish I had a US smile.. I'm from Ukraine and I have a very mean looking face and smiling or moving eyebrows too much makes my head hurt so I have to massage my face.. Not when I'm happy tho, then I can smile all I want
I have a coworker like that, he's a deacon at a church and is just genuinely a nice guy. I'm an agnostic but if there were more "Brother Jeremy's" out there, I'd likely have stayed longer when I went.
I just have to say your English is almost perfect. What a lovely girl. So thoughtful, beautiful and sweet. 🌸 America gained so much for having you in our country. Wishing you and yours well.
That's for sure
What a nice comment
I agree. You seem to be a vary natural, friendly person and I'm glad your time in the U.S. helped to unlock your warm smile. You give something to us in the States, too -- more understanding about what life is like in Russia, something we know very little about. Thank you for that!
Bonjour, beautiful!
North Americans say that Brazilians smile and hug people too much, why? Veja is very common in Brazil a couple is hugging and kissing next to other people waiting for the bus or subway; you can watch people in cars at traffic lights kissing in the car, I've done this myself several times in the car; I wonder if the Brazilian people are bad characters and naughty about kissing in public... I'll take a break, understand!{ I had a co-worker who came from Morocco, Marrakech - Africa; at a company celebration party an employee hugged his wife and kissed her on the head... He was her colleague but his reaction was super aggressive with his wife, the boy apologized but had done nothing wrong for him to be so aggressive: It was just a hug and kiss on the head representing friendship and respect for her! He the Moroccan was only 1 year and a half in Brazil}. The religiosity of Brazilians, the economy, life and their social heritage gives the people a different face from other countries in America. Carnival and all Brazilian parties are different in terms of seasoning and values, for example: There are Brazilian songs that are prohibited in the USA, but it is allowed to buy guns in the USA; in Brazil it's a crime and gives you 15 years in prison if you're caught with guns (Numbers of children killed in Brazilian schools - ZERO! In the USA there are three attacks a year! Carnival has beautiful women with exposed asses and breasts, sexual freedom, homosexual marriage, Angels and Demons... But there is a beautiful expression that says: Living in Europe is beautiful and sublime but life sucks!Living in Brazil sucks but life is beautiful and wonderful!
Americans say that Brazilian women are beautiful and prostitutes... I'm in a stage of life that if you told me that 2+2=10, that's fine! It's not my problem, it's your problem! If they are prejudiced, envious, cowardly and ignorant it is their problem and not mine, it will only be my problem if I agree! For example: My aunt and my mother's sister is a prostitute; she had been sick for a week and my mother went to help her sister not to miss the trade point. My mother is not a prostitute, my mother is the surrogate! Whore is my aunt... People have to survive. The truth has the face of those who observe them! Joseph spent a year and three months building the tomb of King Herod, Joseph father of Jesus Christ was 40 years older than Mary mother of Christ. Let's look at the facts - More than a year without making love to the wife! Mary is right, the man who does not take care of what he has leaves for others to eat, a point for Mary Mother of Jesus Christ. Every person is free to believe in anything, even flying saucers, why not! Life is short, the best thing in life is to live! That all Brazilians already know very well... The rest of the world makes war and we go to the beach to surf and love, amen! God is inside you and not outside! When humanity awakens to this reality, all wars, prejudices and religions will be just cancerous rubbish for people's control. God cannot fight himself since you have God in your heart! Evil is the absence of God in your heart! Kisses and hugs.
Exactly!!
Smiling in the US to strangers is friendly, but also reflects back to you that we see you as having value, shows respect and love to strangers.
No, the US is the land of fake everything, including smiles. I'm not saying they're all self obsessed narcissists...but most of them are.
I have to agree, In the US a smile is the first encounter where you can say whether or not a friendship can happen. Out of all my neighbors, the only one I do not have a decent relationship with is the one that did not say hi back or smile when I extended an invitation of dialog.
A smile takes effort. I have a homeless friend who was given probably over $100 in the days around last Christmas (2020) by maybe 10 or more strangers. Americans who are generous are often so because they understand/believe that Nature has given us everything we need for life and happiness, and want to return the favor by helping out their neighbors which Nature has also created. However, some are not aware of this and may smile for other reasons. Another video of yours shows gardens and lawns put in by the owners of the apartment buildings and public areas. That takes effort, too, like a smile, but people aren't necessarily suspicious: "Why did you put in this garden?" They take it for what it is, grateful for its beauty. The murals you painted brightened my day, here on the other side of the planet. It is silly for me to think that Nature won't repay you for the effort you put into them. But that many people, as you pointed out, will not be frowning, etc., unless they have a very, very good reason, so my hopes are with the Russian people to have long, happy lives filled with family, friends around the world, and success in their chosen professions.
Exactly right. American from California here. Don't believe the naysayers. It's the norm here to smile as a way of being kind and to wish well to our fellow human beings who are, as the Bible says, created in the image of God.
@@cyberbird451 you are correct.. here in America many people NEED this attention from everyone they encounter, otherwise they'll criticize, marginalize, & bad-mouth them. yes, narcissistic.. and they think they're the "nice" ones lol
I think the Americans find a reason to laugh, they tell jokes alot too.
I'm Polish and I remember how much people smiled in the streets when mask mandate was off for four months last year. I can't wait to smile at people when the masks aren't mandatory again
Yes, it's been horrible! They've stolen our smiles and our hugs!
I smile at people with my mask on and they recognise it :D
It depends on if it reaches the eyes.
If I smiled at you I don't think you would like it all you would see is a set of gums ha ha
You can draw a smilie on your mask. Problem solved.
Polish people don't smile too. Maybe young generation. 😞
On Mother’s Day 2020 I visited my mother who was in the hospital. I was walking to my car to leave, feeling sort of half depressed because of…I don’t know…where I was, visiting an ailing mother and just generally exhausted after a busy day.
In the parking lot, a woman was holding the hand of a little girl of about four years old as they walked towards the entrance.
As they approached, the little girl looked at me and I smiled and her face lit up with a huge smile back and she waved.
I’m not even sure if the woman she was walking with noticed any of this but it made my day and completely alleviated any negativity I was feeling just seconds before
A simple smile, at the right moment can do amazing things. Mom’s ok now and I’ll never forget that little girl. A gift from heaven on that day, she was.
I am impressed by Natasha's willingness to look beyond stereotypes and by her genuine effort to try to see people as they are, and that she looks for the reasons that may be behind people's behaviors. I like her honest self-assessment of how she views the world around her.
i find it refreshing . in my country you very often hear people's opinions are nothing more than parroted opinions of tv stations/ newspapers...no actual thought at all. not only sad but dangerous too.
As an Englishman (so half way between American and Russian...), I think the smile factor is as you suggested: in the American midwest, people are nicer because they are less stressed than in New York city. This is probably true in most countries - I live away from the larger cities and away from the south-east of England (where life is extremely expensive), so life in my area is less stressful and people are more friendly. In London, it is very different. Worrying about the cost of living can dominate your mood.
As for possible fakeness, maybe it is fairer to say that people are automatically 'nice' - in the same way as we think of Russians as automatically 'grim' - it is just a programmed state of mind. When you smile at another person, you don't feel bad and maybe they feel good, so there is nothing to lose.
Even so, some people are naturally less outgoing - like me - so perhaps when I smile I mean it more genuinely than the average person. This might be related to British weather (!!) which is 99% grey. When I visit a sunny country, I am happier.
When you leave Russia again, I suggest you visit as many other countries as possible. The world is not just Russia and the USA (and China).
Yup we are mid scale !
Not really. Its not really beacuse of stress.
You usually know people in those small communities and eventually it feels as if everyone's basically a friend lol.
In cities like NYC, you see a metric shit ton of people normally, so you dont feel as much "community" as you normally would.
Now I want to go to USA only to see people smiling and greeting each other all the time. The very thought makes me happy. Where I live, people don't smile or look at strangers. The friendly attitude just uplifts your mind and outlook to life. Like she said. I can totally relate to this. Have a lovely day everyone 😁.
I hope you get to come. America is amazing in so many ways!!!
😀😃😄from Florida
It's not like that everywhere in America but most people are courteous (nice) to each other.
We are hear and ready for you with smiles and a socially distanced friendly head nod :) :) (which has now replaced our constant hugging)
Yes, I agree it is uplifting and fun to be friendly! I do it when I do and don't when I don't
3:40 I'm a foreigner living in the US. Actually, when Americans ask you what's up or how it's going, you can actually answer and start a conversation with them if you wish. Of course, you are not expected to get into the details of life but it's OK to talk a little bit about what you are up to and that could be the start of a friendship :)
Yes, you pretty much can but most Americans will be uncomfortable with a stranger answering "how are you" in a negative way. Friends can share their troubles, but strangers are generally expected only to share mostly positive feelings. But absolutely, if you want to strike up a conversation with someone in the states it's totally allowed.
@@celebrim1 Definitely, only positive vibes to share with strangers
@@celebrim1 , where i live in south florida if you say ''how are you?' to some strangers you too often get ''man i'm broke, could you spare some change?''
I was just chatting with an old man at the mail kiosk today and thought about this video. We didn't know each other from Adam but chatted about the summer cicadas and their noises and how bad winter was this year. He's from Kansas originally and and actually knew which truck I drove based on my plates. I really think Americans do this as a protection thing. We're neighbors and to me, this basically means he knows I'm supposed to be here and he's observant about who comes and goes. A lot of the info we exchanged was unspoken/nonverbal I think.
@@АноНим-я3д We don't want one "predetermined answer." Asking "what's up" is not actually always a question. It's a multi-use greeting that started to gain popularity with young people to express how cool they were in the 1990's and it likely started being used originally in hip hop culture. Nowadays, asking "what's up" could mean many different things in America, like the op pointed out. It's like saying hello, how are you or how is life, or what's going on, or good to see you, I acknowledge you, etc.
How you respond depends on who is asking you the question:
-If a friend asks you "what's up" then that means "how is life" or "how are you doing" or "good to see you."
-If someone who you do not know well asks you "what's up" then that could just mean "nice to see you" which is a sign of respect. You would respond with "hey, what's up" and that might be the end of the conversation, unless some decides to open up more.
Nowadays, usually only people under 40 years old will say "what's up" and it has become a standard greeting. Older people will just say hello, how are you, etc. "What's up" is also often pronounced "sup" or "wassup." People in America started using "sup" a lot more in the early 1990's, especially after a famous commercial on tv made the phrase very popular amongst kids. th-cam.com/video/JJmqCKtJnxM/w-d-xo.html
Dear, I spent 5 years in the US for my undergrad. That was 30 years ago. I went back to Turkey, my home country after I graduated. I found a job at some place there. Many used to ask me "why I was smiling too much". They take it as you don't appear to be a serious person. The other reason is overall unhappiness. If you remain among them too long, they reflect their unhappiness at you like a giant mirror. They start punishing you for smiling. I could only stand it there for ten years. I returned to the US in 2004. In fact, even in the first two years of returning to my home country in 1994, I would go back to the US if I had a chance. Here (in the US), the smile may or may not be genuine, but they smile at your face. It still feels good. I still prefer them to frowning people.
Don't ever let negative people on the internet change you. Most people appreciate friendliness and respect. Your standard is a better way.
"Unhappiness?" Could it be the restrictive religion &/or the Big Guy?
@@allatgoddess8961 Oh that was far before the "Big guy". Thanks to him anyway, the whole country will hate religion 🤣😂 The overall unhappiness I described was a decade before him, during the previous corrupt administrations that brought him. It is now "overall unhappiness times 10".
@@mrjones4249 so well said! I smile at you.
Thank you for your very open and interesting answer. I am biased because I'm American. But I like to think that we are happier here than most countries. Although I like to take into context that America was never in a really bad land war where hundreds, thousands, and millions died. My heart goes out to Russians who lost so many people. I don't know too much about Turkey and war but I suspect that there were wars during the Ottomon Empire. We in America don't deserve it but we are simply blessed to be in a country that hasn't had a big war. If we did, maybe then we would smile less.
I dated a German exchange student in highschool and she mentioned much the same thing. Americans smile a lot and are polite/friendly. She kind of felt that there was a lot of cultural insincerity, not in a bad way but that many people she associated with created a kind of superficial friendship. Like when she was leaving a girl she knew approached her and said she was going to miss her and really liked her, she told me that the two of them had never had a connection or talked at any length or depth about anything, just basic conversation and that it was confusing to her that the girl would feel that way or at least say those things because they weren't really friends. I told her that it not necessarily insincerity, or that at least that's the wrong the word for it, I don't know what the right word would be, but that she probably did like you, and appreciated your presence but never really got to know you. She would think she was being impolite if you left and she didn't somehow express that she appreciated you in some manner, even if you never became close. Overly/unnecessarily expressive maybe, but not totally insincere. Americans, we pick up people and drop them fairly easily. Some stick of course, but American culture in general is very fluid in that way. Kind of makes sense, since many Americans are descendants of people who left everything/everyone behind to make their fortune or start anew (or be in a religious cult- and that makes sense too) That's why individualism is a big part of the culture.
Frowns! A German girl came to our young adult church group for a couple months. She not only never smiled, but had a terrible frown. I couldn't understand it because she was incredibly beautiful. Later I went to Germany and EVERYBODY there frowns like they are extremely upset. It was shocking. I later had a German girlfriend, who would smile a lot around me. I asked her about it and she said she learned to smile in her world travels. In the USA and India people smile a lot. When she got back to Germany she was saddened by the frowns.
@@tomgreene7942 I actually found Germans more friendly. In Germany you shouldn't expect to connect through a smile automatically except in a social setting (parties etc) when people are really very friendly. You have to make a polite, positive, respectful comment first. (say in an elevator). Service staff tend not to smile because its seen as wrong to make a service worker smile for doing their job. The "Have a nice day" comment after picking up your fast food order in say the US is seen as fake and forced on the employee. This has changed a lot due to travel.
It’s not even that (to the OP) - you simply can’t sustain thousands of friendships. It’s just not doable, the same way you couldn’t cook 100 meals in a day or something like that.
I'm from Germany and I spent half a year in the US. I *totally* agree with OP. I could never really express it that well but it's exactly what I've been thinking.
Americans aren't really "fake". They might say "it was pretty good" when they really think it was shit, but they're not trying to deceive anyone. It just seems impolite and uncomfortable to them to be that direct about something negative. But then they DO let you know what they really think if they think it's important. They'll just be indirect about it because that's what's polite.
Or when people date and one person isn't that into it, they'll often say like "yeah it was great let's do it some other time" but never follow through on plans. Until the other person "gets" that they don't want to hang out. Because they're too uncomfortable expressing that negativity directly. That's a dark side of this agreeableness. But it's still not being "fake". "Fakeness" is just not the right word for it.
People do flake on others a lot more easily in the US though, that's true. You make and lose connection much easier in the US. Which is exciting but also sort of exhausting especially if you're introverted.
Also no stranger ever smiled at me in the US. I talked with my American friend about Germany and she was like "don't people smile at you on the sidewalk in Germany". She said it always made her day better. She thought it was weird people didn't do it in Germany. But noone did it to me in the US either. Like ever. So I just thought it was because she's a pretty girl?
Why do you think noone ever smiled at me in public in the US?
Smiling at strangers in western cultures is mostly a way to show that you have friendly and not hostile intentions towards them.
Perfect example with the car door. He wanted to show you that he's not going to be angry or threatening towards you just because of the situation. So its like a signal that you can relax.
Following this logic, Russians not smiling is hostile behaviour? 😂 I think it’s just oppressive past. I’m Russian Canadian, 24 years in USSR/Russia, 19 in Canada. Canadians smile even more than Americans, btw 🙂
@@mikenoneofyourbusiness7122 No then the state of that person is very unclear. That's why you smile in some countries... to make it clear.
@@mikenoneofyourbusiness7122 i guess this sense of hostility is something that is still carried from the times of soviet regime. Living in a country that used to be a part of ussr (even though i was already born after regaining independence) it's still very clear how a mark has been left, especially on the older generations. They do not tend to trust, so hostility becomes sort of a natural state i guess.
I'm from Germany and smiling a lot/at strangers is seen as fake here, too. You don't have to smile at someone to show them you're not hostile. Just don't be hostile in mannerisms and tone. Fake smiles are not needed.
@@DM-nw5lu No there's nothing fake about showing you dont have any hostile intentions in a tense situation. Most people apprecieate that. As you can also see according to the video above. But I know a few people lack that natural skill and might misinterpret it as fake.
My wife is from Russia and she had the same culture shock. She thought it was weird for complete strangers to somettmes say hello to one another on the streets. I have also been to Russia myself and people in general keep to themselves. But when engaged in conversation, you can't get them to shut up! 😀
Lived in Odesa, Ukraine for three years. It took a while for them to realize that I was the "American" and always smiling because I'm generally a happy person. Before long, when they would see me they would smile also. Just spreading the happiness when I could.
when you what? you cut off at that end, damnit man are you okay!
@@deepakx7 "...when I could spread happiness." I'm fine. I was with the US Peace Corps and we were evacuated because of COVID in March 2020. As soon as it lifts (and Ukraine vaccinates) I will be going back.
@@stischer47 Ukraine is at war with Russia, which I am sure you herd of when you were there so people there are different then in Russia. Hope you learn more about the country you visit in the future.
@@lyudmilaaksan2232 The reason I chose to live in Ukraine was because I HAD studied the history of Ukraine (from before the Kyivan Rus ) and wanted to see for myself what it and its people were like. After over three years, I learned a lot which only increased my knowledge of the people and the land. I never thought Ukrainians were Russian, as you seem to think. I hope you will learn to ask rather than make assumptions (as shown by your last sentence). Luckily, most of the Ukrainians I've met (except maybe the dinosaurs) were not so quick to judge.
@@stischer47 I am glad you know so much about Ukraine:). I did not mean to offend you. Lots of people that live there just live day to day not caring about their own history or any other country's.
I love this. Thank you for making this.
I did a little social experiment one time at an office i worked at...
I had to walk past alot of others to get to my desk. The mood in the office was not good, no one smiled. I decided to say "good morning" every morning to each person as i passed their desk, for a week. It was awkward at first because no one was expecting it but the mood became happier after a few days. It was very cool to see how infectious a little kindness was. I even became happier myself because i made others smile.
After the first week i stopped saying anything's each morning. One person stopped me and said " wheres my good morning" ? I stopped, smiled and said "good morning" and we both instantly were happier. So I continued the " good mornings" because it made me happier to make people smile.
I learned this ... one person can make a very large impact on other peoples day with one simple act. I have not gone back to my introverted self. That was 10 years ago.
Well done!
Hi Natasha. Your English is amazing. Pronunciation excellent. I came to New Zealand from Canada back in the 69s on a world adventure and stayed. New Zealanders are very friendly and have the ability to small talk so pick up conversations easily. I try and be extra polite with people serving me and have a bit of fun with them too. Makes both our days. Also most people thank bus drivers when leaving the bus even at the back. I hope you can come and visit New Zealand one day. The people are nice and the scenery spectacular.
How refreshingly honest this young person is. How curious and brave. Good on you.
when i moved to the South in the US, it was so delightful that everybody passing by you in a car would wave, and you'd wave back. Sometimes it's just lifting a finger off the steering wheel as you pass each other. It's a good thing, just to make a small acknowlegement that "you exist, I see you."
Yes, when I lived in rural Texas, you always lifted your index finger from the steering wheel as a greeting. If someone didn't lift a finger back, you knew that they were either 1) a stranger or 2) mad at you for some reason.
I love living in the South!! People are so genuinely kind and friendly.
Farmer Finger!☝️😀
I live in a liberal northern town, we used to smile, now so many people are masked and with earbuds in and will not acknowledge someone else at all except to cross the street to pass on the other side.
A really I'm British and when I tried to be friendly I was robbed 3 times in 4 months once at gunpoint once with a knife and once on threat of getting beat up I don't think I'm going back to your wonderful country it couldn't happen in London there are cameras everywhere
As an American this made me smile 😬 I’m from Tennessee. I’m very southern, we smile & small talk a lot here. I’m glad you enjoyed your time here! Hopefully one day you can come back & visit some other states!
LOL Southerners do not believe a small chat. You all are a bunch of chatty cathys
Im from Tennessee too
Bonjour, beautiful!
North Americans say that Brazilians smile and hug people too much, why? Veja is very common in Brazil a couple is hugging and kissing next to other people waiting for the bus or subway; you can watch people in cars at traffic lights kissing in the car, I've done this myself several times in the car; I wonder if the Brazilian people are bad characters and naughty about kissing in public... I'll take a break, understand!{ I had a co-worker who came from Morocco, Marrakech - Africa; at a company celebration party an employee hugged his wife and kissed her on the head... He was her colleague but his reaction was super aggressive with his wife, the boy apologized but had done nothing wrong for him to be so aggressive: It was just a hug and kiss on the head representing friendship and respect for her! He the Moroccan was only 1 year and a half in Brazil}. The religiosity of Brazilians, the economy, life and their social heritage gives the people a different face from other countries in America. Carnival and all Brazilian parties are different in terms of seasoning and values, for example: There are Brazilian songs that are prohibited in the USA, but it is allowed to buy guns in the USA; in Brazil it's a crime and gives you 15 years in prison if you're caught with guns (Numbers of children killed in Brazilian schools - ZERO! In the USA there are three attacks a year! Carnival has beautiful women with exposed asses and breasts, sexual freedom, homosexual marriage, Angels and Demons... But there is a beautiful expression that says: Living in Europe is beautiful and sublime but life sucks!Living in Brazil sucks but life is beautiful and wonderful!
Americans say that Brazilian women are beautiful and prostitutes... I'm in a stage of life that if you told me that 2+2=10, that's fine! It's not my problem, it's your problem! If they are prejudiced, envious, cowardly and ignorant it is their problem and not mine, it will only be my problem if I agree! For example: My aunt and my mother's sister is a prostitute; she had been sick for a week and my mother went to help her sister not to miss the trade point. My mother is not a prostitute, my mother is the surrogate! Whore is my aunt... People have to survive. The truth has the face of those who observe them! Joseph spent a year and three months building the tomb of King Herod, Joseph father of Jesus Christ was 40 years older than Mary mother of Christ. Let's look at the facts - More than a year without making love to the wife! Mary is right, the man who does not take care of what he has leaves for others to eat, a point for Mary Mother of Jesus Christ. Every person is free to believe in anything, even flying saucers, why not! Life is short, the best thing in life is to live! That all Brazilians already know very well... The rest of the world makes war and we go to the beach to surf and love, amen! God is inside you and not outside! When humanity awakens to this reality, all wars, prejudices and religions will be just cancerous rubbish for people's control. God cannot fight himself since you have God in your heart! Evil is the absence of God in your heart! Kisses and hugs.
😂❤👍
I moved up north to Ohio from Arkansas. I went to training for my company and there were 2 guys from Arkansas there. We hung out the whole week and were like friends 😂 felt like being home again
Hello, this vlog about cultural differences, reminds me of a time when I had just arrived to Paris from London where I was living at the time (by Eurostar). I asked a French employee in French "Excuse me Sir what is the best way to get from A to B?". He gave me a very good piece of advice as he probably did to everyone who had just arrived from London. He said :in France, you always should say Bonjour before asking someone anything, you cannot start the question by simply saying excuse me" It was very good advice and soon realised that this is how it is done in France and I of course adopted this way of interacting. I always do it when I am in France.
"He said :in France, you always should say Bonjour before asking someone anything, you cannot start the question by simply saying excuse me" It was very good advice and soon realised that this is how it is done in France"
This is a very good advice. For France, surely. And I had the very same experience in Poland this year. People are much more polite and more formal than we are in Germany. The many fellow German tourists sort of invading rather than nicely entering a restaurant or hotel really made me feel extremely embarrassed. I tried to be a little more thoughtful, which sometimes ended up being talked to in Russian by elderly people, telling me not having to be ashamed to be Russian - despite of the current situation ...
@@herminenasse4607 oh woaooo, it was funny what the old people said , yet it shows that they were really open minded and they definitely liked you no matter what nationality ....
Yes, I noticed this in France too. In NYC you can walk in any shop and say nothing to the shopkeeper, but in France, everyone seemed to say Bonjour right when they walked in the store, so I started that, too! It’s a cute tradition.
As an American, I'm always told I don't smile enough or I'm constantly asked, "what's wrong?" Or "are you ok?" It drives me crazy!
Maybe I should move to Russia, so people stop asking me stupid questions. Russians also seem more realistic about life in general.
I was in a bad mood and some lady told me I “looked like I lost my best friend” very loudly. Or worse, old men telling me to smile. It’s nice for people to care but also sometimes it can cross over into invasive.
Come to live in Finland, we don't smile either. As the happiest country on Earth, we believe the happiness will escape our bodies if we express it so we don't! Just kidding, every country has it's positives and negatives :)
@@eaaeeeea Don't tease me, I would love to live in Finland, Sweden, or Norway.
@@eaaeeeea I have heard Finnish don’t smile but love to Tango. I’ve never seen someone smiling while dancing the Tango.
This was a really awesome and honest explanation of Russian and American culture. What boggles my mind is how our politicians want to make us out to be enemies, but the American _people_ and the Russian _people_ ....we are not enemies, and in fact seem to get along quite well. These days I don't pay attention to the media nor to politicians, who are only interested in getting rich at our expense.
At any rate, I really enjoyed this and have subscribed 😊
This is funny. I’m from Virginia and it’s pretty routine to talk to complete strangers... talk their ear off, learn their name, get phone numbers, and even giving hugs...especially if the person is having a bad day. This is across the board, not dependent on race, ethnicity, etc... I guess we are weird. 😂💋🇺🇸
Stay weird.......the world needs that kind of weirdness!
Virginia is overrun with federal government employees, I am quite certain any time a government employee smiles it is because they are about the screw somebody.
Amen sista from the East coast. 🤗❣
wow so do believe u are nice..how odd...i rather be russian..if i dont care about others..i wouldnot pretend to.care
@@ForestSakan But, why wouldn't you care about others?!
My Dad would always wave and smile when driving by a person in the street. I’d ask him who the person was and he’d say “I don’t know”. As a young person this would crack me up. Now I do it in my town. This is in the Midwest.
Down here in the South, too.
@A Rodriguez I do it everyday in my neighborhood. Almost everyone waves and many smile back.
Same!! I live in Kentucky now and the people here will start conversations with you and be very friendly like there are no strangers. It's actually really nice because they're genuinely kind.
@A Rodriguez you don't belong here in the midwest if you're thinking like that.
Yes, everyday here too! The midwest.
Some time ago, I went on a date with an exchange student from Russia and her lack of smiling really threw me off. At first I thought I was boring her... then I saw it was just her personality.
I read that forcing a smile can actually cause a person to feel happy.
A classmate of mine used to take "Laughing Yoga", where the class was encouraged to laugh together. He said it actually did make him happier :P
That's actually true because the muscles used when you smile release some endorphins or something like that. Great, huh?
faking emotions is bad.
no, fake smiling wont make you happy
@@katherinetutschek4757 keyword is together
When we hear others laughing it has a positive effect. When you smile at yourself in the MIRROR it even has such an effect but much smaller, but thats because your reflexive brain in a way perceives your reflection as another human smiling at you
@@lil_weasel219 Actually there is a saying "fake it until you make it." I was a totally bashful introvert and used that saying and it worked. I can now easily enter any social environment and feel comfortable. Smiling invites people in where frowning puts up a block to the world. I'm not suddenly transformed into an extrovert by any means, but I've learned to actually like people.
My fiancee is Russian and it's taken her a little bit to be more "cheery" per se but not because she isn't like this. She is amazingly warm, polite, and quite cheery. It's just the way she was raised and her environment. What I've learned during my time with her is that Russians are incredibly warm and hospitable people once you form part of their circle of friends.
Yeah its just a matter of foreigners feeling foreign in other countries i guess. Im german and my grandma lived in a small village in Slovenia, the first time i remember visiting her the whole village felt rather hostile, nobody likes germans in the slav countries due to historical complications. However when they learned that we where related to that nice old lady that was my grandma it was like the whole village was part of the family and everybody was very friendly ;)
I have a few questions:
(1) How did you two get together?
(2) Is she a spy?
(3) Does it seem like she is trying to subvert our democratic process?
@@I_Have_The_Most_Japanese_Music
Let me guess a few things:
1. You believe the election was “a fraud”.
2. You refuse to wear a mask and get vaccinated.
3. The candidate you voted for is also known as “Co-conspirator number 1”.
4. You still live with your parents, drink either Pabst Blue Ribbon or Natty Daddy and one more just for fun!
5. (If you have a car) one of the following bumper stickers is attached “Blue Lives Matter”, “We The People”, “Salt Life” or “If you don’t like the way I drive, DIAL 1-800-EAT-SHIT”.
@@thebirdwhoflew312 It's a high quality implementation but somehow you got the direction 180 degrees off.
@@thebirdwhoflew312 👍
A famous American Dolly Parton says " If you see someone without a smile, give them yours"😊
Yeah i love Dolly.❤
It's a good saying. 😁
Every man smiles when he see Dolly Parton.
@@protectorh9167 😂😂😂
@@protectorh9167 Not true. :D
Come on girl , smile , you have a pretty face. With a smile on your face ,you will be even more so. Promise me you will smile more ok.? Thank you.
Smiling and small talk are alot of work for the introverts among us. Great video, thanks for posting.
This was so interesting to me. I live in Midwest USA and am completely used to seeing smiles & smiling out in public. I don’t think of it as fake, it’s more like ”we’re all in this together “. I think smiling can actually help us feel better. One time I was eating lunch alone in a restaurant and feeling sad because my husband had died a few weeks earlier. I decided to “catch smiles” of other diners at other tables. In doing so I was cheered up a bit. I’m subbing to see what else you’re up to.
@Chosen Remix , it isn’t “acting”. It is choosing to BE!
@Kathy Cagg >>>
(1) I agree with you.
(2) Sorry you lost your hubby.
I live in another happy area of the United States now with lots of nature (moving to Europe though). Lots of genuine friendliness and happiness, but we also are generally busy and tend to only make plans on weekends with friend groups. Other countries have been more social for me. But i love the friendliness stereotype
I don’t think Russians are expected to be happy. Suffering is a part of Russian history.
Also from the Midwest. You are correct. We smile without thinking too much about it. If anything, just to say "hey, we're both people going through life." Lived in China many years, and was confused-and a bit saddened-by the coldness people had with strangers.
Natasha, I loved your honesty and completely empathise with you. I lived in Southern California for 9 years after living in Berlin for many years and was blown away by the culture of smiling when I first arrived there. I'm from Scotland and remember a German friend asking me why I had smiled at a passing stranger when I didn't know them. So I probably did smile a bit before living in America but really learned how to make it a habit after living there for a while. The energy and positivity that Americans have and show is something we all need to learn and maintain once we return home. Thank you for your courage and openness.
It is clear that it is a good position to bring more positivity to the world, but I'm more for sincerity, because I'm Russian. My conditions are as follows. Sincere joy, friend, loved one, neighbor, joke, pun, tickle, memory of funny, but there must be a reason.
@@fgjjdgb3949 A reason? I smile because I am alive, and I appreciate the beauty that God has given the world.
@@returnofthemac2951 See, this thought came to your mind, you felt this pleasant feeling and there was a reason to smile and you smiled. Any reason is important, it's like fuel for a smile, without a reason it's just a cramp or a fake. If you smile just from the sight of a person, it's generally wonderful.
@@fgjjdgb3949 It's an acknowledgement that the person is not invisible, and that their mere presence means something in this world, even to a stranger.
@@returnofthemac2951 This is a very important quality, it can say a lot about a person.
In the American military my drill sergeant said, "false motivation, is better than no motivation." Keep smiling and work and life will be more enjoyable. Embrace the suck.
Hooah!
nice one, thats true, imagine life you want to live, and act like you have one
@@johnmalkovich6397 Yeah, imagine you want life with NO masks , vaccines or lockdowns, act like you have it and see Corona cultists descend on you ....
@@tvrtkoceric5681 you are talking about denying reality. We are in the middle of a global pandemic that is the reality and humanity has to do its best to diminish its impact. What the other people are talking about it not denying reality but more in line with to make the best out of a situation regardless how dire the circumstances currently might be because it will get better eventually
Mine told me to pull my head out of my 4th point of contact....
When an American smiles at you, it's a gesture of friendliness.
You have a magic power: the comments here are overwhelmingly positive! Considering what TH-cam 'culture' generally is, that is a remarkable achievement!
it really just depends on the demographic of the video
wow simp
what??
I find her much less materialistic than the average Russian woman. She sees beauty in many ordinary things.
I'm an American and I smile a lot. I tend to be chatty but recognize when chattiness is not appropriate. Never underestimate how powerful a smile is. It can brighten a day just a little bit more. I remember one time I was very angry at something and wound up and then I passed a mother and her toddler and the child waved to me and smiled and I smiled and waved back. It disarmed me instantly and I was relaxed and grounded again and realized how silly I was. I sometimes feel sorry for those who cannot smile. Sometimes, I equate smiling in certain situations as a sign of grace, etc. But the one thing I take from every smile I receive is...warmth.
I experienced this when I visited Russia. They said "I looked American, I looked ahead not at my feet and was confident and happy." You explained it perfectly. I understand now. I thought it was beautiful and would go back.
Russians walk like looking for coins on the ground
I don't think the smile is fake in most people. As a speech language therapist, I would probably refer to it as a social smile. It's part of the culture, and some areas may smile more than others. If I go to NYC (Manhattan, NY city), I don't usually make eye contact or smile, but in the suburbs out in Suffolk County of Long Island, I am more likely to make brief eye contact with a slight smile.
I am an old man born in the USA who has an older female friend from Belarus who has lived in the US for 26 years. She still does not smile at strangers. She does not understand when I say hello to a stranger. She gets upset with me when I do. I hope I can show her this video to give her your insights. Удачи.
I never smile so I would probably fit in well in Russia. Americans obsession with smiling and all of that always seems fake to me.
@@darylmccormick Social niceties are ultimately a matter of evaluating whether or not someone is a threat; unless someone is a complete psychopath, any ill intentions are likely to become apparent as a result of even a very brief social interaction. Smiling at someone doesn't mean you've fallen in love with them, it merely means that you do not object to their presence and do not intend to cause them harm. This is why the more remote the setting, the more exaggerated and extended the social interactions will be: the more isolated you are, the more important it is to collect accurate intelligence on those you encounter.
@@costakeith9048 To unaccustomed people smiling at them is threatening.
Some things when ingrained deeply are hard to change. What used to be called set in their ways. But some can readily adapt. Maybe this would do good. But in America there's several different behaviors. But no matter what, we're still human.
Well, plane tickets are Still sold to Belarus 😁
Smiling and small talk for some Americans acts as a tension breaker. Since we don't know each other, we are telegraphing to each other that we are not a threat. Typically we expect the other person to smile back to put us at ease.
and what if someone doesn't want to talk and smile? is he suspicious, dangerous or what? really interesting
@@МикаФлавин yes!... lol. I think it is not abnormal to have a negative view or thoughts about someone if you smile and wave to them, and they just stare at you. I consider it very rude, and will pretty much avoid that person from then on if they don’t at least show something back. At the very least I take it as a hint that they are either angry, or have no interest in me. Typing this out makes me feel very judgmental.😂
Exactly.
@@МикаФлавин if you don't want to talk ,you don't talk.
Nobody will blame you or get annoyed, if you don't want to talk!
But sometime a guy can be very polite and smiling like Ted Bundy.
I have lived all over the USA and in Scotland. There are fake smiles and sincere smiles. It's a condition of the heart in the individual. If your heart is full of love for people, your smile will never be fake. It isn't only because of politeness. So those of you who smile when you don't want to...don't. Why lie to people and yourself? But if you love your fellow man....Smile away and don't apologize.
I'm Australian and we do smile a lot too. My family and I went to Germany and the people at the airport scared us. We all went in different lines for the passport check and all of us commented how serious and stern the people working there were, not friendly at all. We want to go to Russia but actually don't feel it's safe enough to do it because we've been told it's worse than Germany. The German people were nice, just humorless in most cases.
Every day on my way home from work I would always pass, "The walking man". At least that's what I called him. He always wore sun glasses and walked up the hill with his walking stick. He would smile and waved whenever I'd pass. Then one day I saw him walking in the town center on the sidewalk. That's when I realized he was blind. He never saw me smile or wave back. He only heard the cars coming and smiled and waved to everyone. I haven't seen him in several months. I hope he's ok.
Such a lovely story!
Where I live in Yorkshire, England we not only smile at strangers in the street, we say hello as well!
Y'all reet? Yorkshire is the place where waiting for a bus and having a conversation are the same thing.
The same thing happens in Bolivia, especially if the girl is pretty
@@fredneecher1746 "Y'all reet"?? That's more Tyneside than Yorkshire.
That you do! :)
I often think that to give someone a smile costs me nothing, but is always something of value to all who share it.
Ok, but I as a Slavic person (I'm from Poland) I think that smiling to everyone on the street when you don't know them it's a little bit weird. 😁🤷♀️
Very heartwarming video! Thank you for expressing yourself with authenticity
I live in a suburb of Minneapolis, it makes me happy that our culture had a lifelong impact on you.
@Chosen Remix I don't know the circles you run around it but that's not my experience. 💩 post
@Chosen Remix 💩
@Chosen Remix Ha ha ha. When I was in Europe I was ready to come home to America where we could hang out with friends at the BarBQ, drink beer, burp and fart and not be shamed. LOL
I am also from Minneapolis and suburbs, (born in Duluth) and am 1/2 Finnish. I get accused of not smiling enough by the wife. I tell her that's the way Finnish people are! I'm just wired that way!
@@tomgreene7942, @Chosen Remix In America every conversation seems to end talking about shit and farting.
Russians seem to be serious. But when I said "Hello, Comrades!" in Russian to a visiting delegation, everyone laughed and began to talk with me, whether my Russian is good or not.
for those who don't know, the translation is "Privet suka!"
@@gumikebbap now don't go teaching swear words like that ;)
@@Littlebeth5657 I strictly follow the textbooks. No worry.
An amazing example of a young adult “finding herself” in the world. Such an active and searching mind, finding insight and answers.
It's apparent that she has a lot to learn about what true caring is about. I don't think Minnesota was the best place to truly understand the concept of caring since it's south Canada. She needs to come to the southeast and connect with native southerners for a comparison.
@@johncarter1137 I don't think that's true at all. I live in Michigan and my parents in Toronto and we have some very caring people, thank you very much.
Young adult "Creating herself".
Life is not about finding yourself, it's about creating yourself.
@@veg7nlif376 Same thing. Finding out from the inside how to adapt to the outside, and grow..
That is a beautiful thing to say. And supportive!
You're a Compassionate woman. 💚
I hate Smalltalk, I like when people just walked by nod and a smile that’s, perfect.
If you don't like Smalltalk, then you should try C# or Javascript
@@xtrailz Ba Dom Boom!
Same. As an American I never really thought about the fact that we do "small talk" and ask eachother how we are without actually wanting a long answer... But once I finally heard from foreigners about how strange this is, now I always overthink it and it kind of drives me crazy now, lol
Says the guy making small talk in a comment xD
@@DecrepitIllusion typing not talking xD
I think it’s important not to assume people’s smiles are automatically fake. When it’s related to commerce it often can be (retail shops, airlines, secretary’s etc..), but when it’s in the street or in the wider community, bus drivers etc its often more genuine. People commonly smile and greet, talk with strangers here in New Zealand (culture is probably a mix of British and US influence, with our own added uniqueness), and I see smiling as a way that people express good wishes or warmth towards others they don’t know. When I pass someone and smile, it’s both an unspoken communication of good wishes, and an effort perhaps to make them feel more comfortable with my presence. Thanks for the insightful video 🙂
Thanks! Yes, showing good wishes and warmness to others is what smiles meant for me in the US. I would love to visit New Zealand and Australia and to see how people differ there. You have your own uniquness, indeed.
Yeah Russia You definitely should. I’d like to think we’re a friendly bunch down here in the South Pacific! ...perhaps wait till ‘post-covid’ though 🙃😕😅
mattheginger you are absolutely spot on. I am from England and to smile at someone we do not know is simply, as you say, an expression of warmth and friendliness to others.
And I agree that the smiles are genuine gestures and not fake at all.
On the flip side, I have met and worked with Russian speakers from Russia, Latvia, Lithuania, Belarus, the Ukraine.
These people are all lovely warm and friendly too and they do smile when they get to know a person more.
I dated a Belarusian woman too and she was adorable, warm and kind.
The general point is everyone smiles sometimes, for different reasons personally and culturally. And just because someone smiles less does not necessarily mean they are ‘less warm or less friendly’
Natasha - your videos are great and your personality shines through. I also want to say how good your English is and I am personally also very impressed at your general knowledge.
Keep up the amazing work 👌😊
Exactly, it bothered me how she kept mentioning that. Like yeah, sometimes people will have a fake smile (esp in places like dentists’ offices and restaurants, as you mentioned), but often times they are being genuine. I wish she would have tried to read into the situation more with the bus driver...
@@mattheginger From an American perspective your very friendly down under, more like us here in rural America although I would guess people in places like Melbourne and Wellington in NZ are less friendly than rural folks there.
Psychology research claims the act of smiling alone, even when you do not feel like smiling, is beneficial for your mental health. There is a feedback mechanism from the facial muscles to the brain.
Actually this is pseudoscience. People who work in jobs where they are forced to always smile are more likely to suffer from depression
@@mariemaier5630 I worked as a cashier for 9 months where i was forced to have a cheery attitude, easily the worst job i ever had.
@@mariemaier5630 Of course being forced to do anything against your will is detrimental.
there is some feed back but not what they used to say back in the day “ can’t be sad if you are smiling”. Which is absolutely not true, but thoughts feelings and behaviors are intrinsic. Meaning anyone of them can affect or cause the others. Fake it till you make it is very true. Behavior can 100% influence thoughts. The smile can influence you to feel better at times. But it can’t be forced by your boss either. It’s gotta be your idea.
@@mariemaier5630 I’ve worked as a cashier and yeah, more often than not the smile is a mask and behind that mask is indifference or tedium. Then there are the customers who bring some light into your day and the smile is genuine.
I just love your authenticity, there is a shortage of that here…
In some areas, smiling at a stranger could equate to flirting, so in larger especially northern US cities where more cultures blend, you’ll see a bit less smiling.
Also I was homeless for a long time. People really do care about strangers here! I rarely went without a couple dollars to eat, even if I couldn’t afford to do laundry or other things.
When disasters happen, people who never met will come out of the woodwork to help one another.
The earth is fortunate to have you here, you have made me smile
My wife is Ukrainian and when she visits her family in Ukraine her sister scolds her for talking casually with store clerks and smiling. "You smile too much!"
Yes. Why is this bitterness such a norm there?
I hear that too
I think life was very tough in Russia under the communists. They didn't have much reason to smile.
Wow.
That's Really Sad 😔😔
Many good observations were intelligently and astutely made. This is how understanding is developed. Thanks Natasha.
I'm italian and my girlfriend is from Romania, for many years i never understood her, she rarely smile or laugh.. i was thinking there was a problem between us.. now i better understand.. here in italy people are always smiling 😊
True! Italians are very joyful. I love it
Not true, it depends where you come from. In my region we don’t smile a lot, we look always upset, so I do understand the Slavs.
@@anathemaii7911 what's your region?
Romania is broke that’s why they don’t smile
I do not agree. Ticket controllers on Italian buses and trains very rarely smile!
Studies show that smiling releases neurotransmitters in your brain that make you feel better.
Do you think it works even if you don't mean it? th-cam.com/video/w8vsuOXZBXc/w-d-xo.html
That's the reason americans smile so much! We need the boost 😂
@@SaneAsylum It most definitely does. I'm disabled, my face is half paralyzed so this is a big issue to me but nowadays I don't care what I look like I just chipper up and 'smile' when I want to and it's improved my outliook 500%. I will say, if your down in the dumps a smile is not likely to brighten up your day, it's not like that. BUT it improves your day- and can set you on a more positive path like having momentum or a bonus to a positive outlook.
i never smile but still i am happy and feel great :) cheat smile wont make u feel better ...
@@pdraggy I disagree but on a technicality. I do not think the act of smiling when you don't mean it has any positive effect, but I do think the act of boldly going out into society with a onerous positive affirmative faith in the good (that motivates that attempt at a smile) does.
It's awesome to hear her. I took American smiling for granted. Speaking for myself as an American I was taught that smiling looking people in the eye and acknowledging their presence was polite and would help me in the long run to open more doors and create more positive experiences and opportunity.
My wife and I spent a week in Moscow about 10 years ago due to my wife's job.
I also speak Russian having studied it at school so I was excited to go there.
We were totally shocked by how miserable and depressed people seemed even at that time.
We have travelled all across the world but Russia and Bulgaria are the two countries where nobody seems to have any natural warmth for other people.
It's such a weird thing and makes you just want to get away to somewhere where people are warm hearted and happy.
Thanks for this video Natasha.
"Laughter is the best medicine". "Every laugh begins with a smile".
What an amazing perceptive young woman. How fortunate she had the opportunity to visit the United States. She's clearly highly intelligent as she can see what are the good and bad parts. She explain beautifully for her personal perspective and the Russian people in general. I am eager to see more of her videos.
Could not agree more!
When I smile at people in the USA I smile genuinely. I smile because I acknowledge another human and am very happy to do it. It’s not fake.
Yes that's said well, it's an acknowledgement that another human being is in front of you and that you are genuinely happy to know how they are in a very short but sweet manner.
@Bill Blaze What is fake to you is real to us and what is cold and uninterested to us is normal for you.
Bill Blaze: you assume people have the same mentality you have.
@Bill Blaze Yes, it is a courtesy. But it usually makes me feel a little bit of goodness to hear that or to say it. Not everything needs "meaning." Consider a handshake, or even a kiss. What do they mean in words? Well, nothing in particular in words. But in feelings they can mean a lot.
@Bill Blaze Try being honest when people ask. If you are having a bad day, tell them simple, "not great". They will most likely respond with a sincere, "I'm sorry to hear that". And when they do, notice how you begin to feel better about your day because someone cares for you.
It is a myth that the question is usually fake. Generally, people hope that you are having a good day.
-Have a great day! :-)
You have such a kind heart. We love hearing your optimistic view on the world.
Someone called the Western culture "a culture of a stone" and that of the Eastern European people - "a culture of a peel". The people from the West are smiley and benevolent but they won't let you too close, meanwhile the people from Eastern Europe appear to be gloomy but once you get through it you can develop that something that we would call true deep friendship. And that's pretty damn accurate from what I experienced.
I think so too.
In Poland we're the same, I mean in Eastern way of smile. Had a huge mindfuck when ppl, just passing me by on a walkway were asking me "How you doin'?(In Northern Ireland).
I live in California - smiley people will walk right by you if you were bleeding to death - but they would smile!
New Yorkers may appear rude, but when something horrible like the 9-11 attack happens - they'll risk their own life to try and save another. I think we saw evidence of this on that terrible day. Russian folks seem genuine, but maybe not at a casual glance.
«Там живут несчастные люди дикари, на лицо ужасные добрые внутри»
@@annadreaming6595 lol Just not quite dikari, more odichavshie from a tough life 😁😊😑
I live in America, and when I say, "how are you?", I expect a true, but short answer because if they are not doing well, maybe I can help, and if not, I am happy for them.
I was thinking the same thing, and I've seen other foreign visitors not realize this
@@okchief Yea, I like it when the reply with "i'm good, just hungry" I'm more than happy to go buy some food to eat :P
ya that's pretty much the norm here, outside of large cities at least.
Yeah, everyone has days where they have something to say. I've heard bad, good as well as just so so.
You should not expect because nobody is obligated to open themselves because they're randomly asked to.
I remember when Boris Yeltsin visited the US in 1989, he visited a grocery store: "He told his fellow Russians in his entourage that if their people, who often must wait in line for most goods, saw the conditions of U.S. supermarkets, 'there would be a revolution.' ”
irrelevant and we know
And indeed, there WAS a revolution. That grocery store ended Communism in Russia.
Ельцин много чего говорил. Понимаю, вам нравятся его слова, но в России его никто не уважает. Для русских он - просто пьяница.
@@МаксимВолжский-б2е да, но при нём было больше свободы, чем сейчас.
@@harrywinslow3946 Russia was never communist. Communism is collectivism without the State. The Soviet Union was Socialist - a State-owned economy, which never works.
One of the few pleasures of all Life is slices of happiness. It pains me to think of beautiful people not smiling at least once a day.