Quit Your Job If You're Unhappy? | TDK #71
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ก.ย. 2024
- The great resignation, ikigai and what it means to be happy.
01:04 - Singapore's World Happiness Ranking
04:15 - 5 Things that Affects Happiness
05:05 - Peg Happiness To Work
07:21 - Perseverance
10:28 - Concept of Ikigai
15:00 - Reward Systems
18:30 - Source of Happiness
22:32 - Pat's Job Switch Experiences
30:08 - Is Happiness the End Goal?
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Cast:
• Johnathan Chua / johnathanchua
• Daniel Lim / danlim11
• Jonathan Paul / jonathanpaul.sxw
• Denise Oh / ohthedenise
Behind the Cam:
• Nashrul Merza
• Julian Chin
• Hisyam Osman
• Daren Khek
• Charlene Goh
Edited by:
Crelyn Chai
I did it, I quit my job! 🥳
Me too !! 😍 after 30years !!
The daily ketchup is something I look forward to watching after a long day of work. Pls keep the good content. I love very single episode . The first thing I look for in my notification icons is the daily ketchup
I can proudly declare that I fit into the type of people who have low expectations and just pursue a simple life. Don't need luxury stuff. Don't need car. Don't take superficial videos and photos for tiktok and Facebook. Haven't even been up marina bay sand yet. Haha.
But you know what. I'm happy and contented.
Just to leave a saying "simplicity is the ultimate sophistication". There's no one model to how one should live a life. I live a simple meaningful life with my family to experience my happiness. And it's all that matters.
This episode taught me one thing - no one gives a shit about how far I am from my goals… except me.
Noticed Pat looking so lovingly at Johnathan Chua. Her happy index must be a high 9.
As a foreign worker in Singapore, I'm much much happier here. Sure, I miss my friends and loved ones, but I'm very grateful for the opportunities and infrastructure this island has provided me.
Glad to hear that, enjoy your stay here :)
Oh which country are you from? Maybe is grass is always greener syndrome?
@@LVPictures he's already here and experiencing it. This statement not valid 😂
@@LVPictures grass is greener on his feet
"Wanting positive experience is a negative experience; accepting negative experience is a positive experience. It's what the philosopher Alan Watts used to refer to as "the backwards law" - the idea that the more you pursue feeling better all the time, the less satisfied you become, as pursing something only reinforces the fact that you lack it in the first place.” - The subtle art of not giving a fuck. Good book.
In the book there is also a true story about Dave Mustaine from the band megadeath who can't help but still consider himself a failure even though his band is one of the GOAT just because he was always comparing to metallica cos he was kicked out of Metallica back when it Metallica released their first album. You can't control other people's performance, if you keep comparing with others you can do well but there will always be others doing better, then you will never be happy. You can only control your own actions so just comparee with yourself can le, are you doing better then yourself in the past, yes then ok liao mah.
Can vouch that TSAONGAF is a well-recommended read. 🙌
This episode was almost 45 mins. But it felt too short! Really quality content. I’m 30 but earning in the 90th percentile of my age group. The more you earn, really makes switching industry a lot harder with a lot of sacrifices.
Thank you for covering this topic. I am 46 and started off doing work that I enjoyed. I then had to increase my pay because of a growing family, and then after many nudges by my then manager I took a more senior role. I didn't like it, but have been doing similar roles across 4 MNC companies each time getting significant pay rises. I didn't like the more senior role as compared to my initial role when starting out (similar with Pat). I now get all the perks, salary above my peers but I drag my feet to work. Recently my boss floated the idea of retrenchment and I asked him for more info about it. Now that my boys are 15 and 20, I find I still can't do something I want because it will mean a change in disposable income - so I continue in this industry and role. Some may think I am ungrateful but i am in a similar role with Pat. Pay is not the only factor in attaining happiness. Yes pay is enough, but what I do everyday is quite meaningless. I help the rich become richer. Rather I want to move into the hospitals because helping people is what is meaningful to me. But the pay will be a massive drop, with no hope of climbing to current levels thereafter. So I am hesitant and most likely will continue in this industry and role until I retire or until i get retrenched. The only hope of moving to the hospitals is when my salary drops such that the opportunity cost of working in the hospitals is much less. This is life for me. You young people who are living at home, use the time to do something you want to do, before money becomes the driver for your job.
Thanks for this video. For someone who is changing career to a totally different sector and industry. This video provides a lot of perspectives. I spent 4 years in the govt sector. Now deciding to join an agency firm. The paycut is real and I basically have to start from the most junior position all over again. Glad to hear the stories shared by you guys :)
Doing what you like and being paid for it, is a double edged sword. To be frank, I've experienced this first hand. Like what was mentioned about your job being the thing you love is really a dangerous thing. I think it's best not to let your bosses or managers know because 9 times out of 10, they will exploit your passion of your work and start piling the work to you. Then when u say its too much they will just say "it's what you like to do what".. Honestly, working with people you can be friends with, doing what you like, having a challenge and a place to grow is probably the best roll of the dice.
Doing what u like and it pays really well is whole different story. Doing what u don't like and pays really well is another whole different story. Then lastly doing what u like but pays okok or not very much also another story.
Pat, I feel you at around 23:18… I wish I had the guts to go out and join different companies, doing jobs that I may or may not have experience in. If the company accepts you without the experience, just join and take it as a learning journey. Our lives are a long one and we can’t foresee what is ahead of us, it may lead to something bigger than you could ever imagine. Your combined experience, like Jack of all trades, may materialise in a way you never thought of. With the support you have from family and friends, just go ahead and soak it those experiences that will come your way. You may be touching someone else life in the process that makes you truly happy.
"Happiness is a choice, not a result" you can be happy whenever and where ever you are in your life.
I can relate mostly to what Pat says and also the quarter-life crisis is real and sometimes people can't afford to quit their jobs mainly due to different family issues perhaps. hope that there will be a part 2 of this topic. feel like it can be more in-depth or guides
hey Pat, I sincerely wish you find the happiness you deserve!
Just wanna say TDK has helped me think a lot about things in my life and motivated me to take action, while also being something very entertaining to listen to. This is good shit! Would love to hear y’all talk more about jobs etc
@18:53… I like what John said… I practice that bringing joy and happiness to others in various form, unknowing to them, makes me happy. However, I GIVE to those who deserves my attention and never wanting anything in return. I am unhappy when someone takes advantage of my generosity for granted especially when it is someone really close to me.
I am truly grateful for all the various topics you guys bring up especially when it’s sensitive or not popular. I look forward to all your episodes and this weeks, made me replay again to better understand the points that each member delivered. Kudos to you guys!
Appreciate what you have. Like John said, having a choice is a privilege. Knowing and appreciating what one is having, will definitely increase the happiness level.
Denise is an amazing host - keep it up!
When JP started on about being not happy at the end bit.
What Michelle Jones Watson said came to me :
“If You Expect Disappointment, Then You Can Never Really Get Disappointed”
"Everyone does what they hate for money and use the money to do what they love." - Jimmy O Yang's father
The word is contentment, not happiness. It is not about settling, it is about be satisfied and grateful for what you already have in life. A major problem with social media is that people start comparing themselves to others. And often the people they are comparing themselves to are influential, rich, powerful etc. However, this is just a very tiny percentage of people and not an accurate depiction of society. And even if we only compares themselves to our peers on social media, more likely that not these peers are only posting about the happy things in their lives, and not the sad things, so then it is a misinterpretation of what we think our peers are going through in life, and we start experiencing emotions like jealousy or disappointment. People in the past did not have such comparisons, the only people they could compare to were their colleagues and their physical friends. And if everyone around them were getting paid the same and doing the same things, it would be much easier to be contented, at least career or financial-wise. It would also be much easier to separate their work from their happiness because the only thing that distinguishes them from their colleagues is what they do after work, like their hobbies and relationships, and not what they can achieve at work, which I assume was not much back then....
In another timeline, Singaporeans find and love their identity.
They no longer talk about being materialistic all the time.
Their elderly no longer commits suicide because they have a community to support them.
They have festivals everywhere without their neighbors complaining.
People meet each other all the time, genuinely and sincerely; instead of superficially on an app, and fall in love.
They no longer berate themselves for being uncreative and cold, and blame the education system.
They have communities everywhere, a community for painting, a community for gardening, a community for coding. People take the initiative to find places where they belong.
Rather than complaining, Singaporeans start to see the potential in their countrymen and encourage them to be better.
Streets are no longer filthy because they want their community clean, yet streets are allowed to be dirty during activities and festivals, because they acknowledge that the happiness of the people are more important.
I want to live in that Singapore.
Pat I am also dealing with my fears and fixation on uncertainty, to me, a therapist really helped. And the people I surround myself with, find comfort in the people around me and that will be okay :)
I feel like Jon's and John's discussion on life is interesting. I think time and money play a huge role in what life has to offer for each person. What Jon said about people should aim higher to experience more things, but that takes money. It's just like how rich people would never experience a poor person's life and vice versa. Rich people would also never experience how the poor people would achieve happiness on the simplest things. For instance, just being able to get a stable job or buy "expensive" food once in a while when they receive a bonus from work to celebrate with their families. The "poor" people will most likely never be able to live in a house like a castle, socialise with people of status (millionaires and billionaires), or experience the finer things in life. However, this may not be what they want, they are just happy to live under a roof or have food on their table, and this is also what rich people would never have to worry about; hence their source of happiness comes from elsewhere.
Overall, once you're born, your social status and wealth determine where, how and when your "happiness" will come and also in what form.
Mind blowing insight!
I like how John mentioned about how some people will feel reluctant to leave their current jobs despite knowing that changing jobs will lead to higher salary progression. It's becoming exceedingly common and expected to change jobs in order to get a higher pay especially with the fact that the cost of living is increasing. But job hopping might not be such an easy thing to do for some.
I struggle with it. I really enjoy working at my current place. My colleagues and boss are great, no office politics, great work life balance (I work in the creative industry so yall know that work life balance is hard to come by). But at the same time I feel the need to change jobs as I want to earn more in order to keep up with rising cost and buying a house etc.
I relate so much with the situation Pat is in :')
I disagree with JP's belief, like how he perceives one life to be happier than another. How can you assume that those who are content with life has lower happiness value that those who pursue opportunities and "fully experience life"? Happiness is subjective and I don't think it can be compared like this.
Furthermore, regarding the idea of fully experiencing life, say if you were to do it according to JP's idea of chasing opportunities and all, wouldn't it then deprive you of experiencing other aspects of life, as there is always an opportunity cost? For example, comparing a person who works hard and earns lots of money, but has no time for family and children, versus a person who lives a humble life just working a normal 9-5 and caring for his family. Is there really a way to "fully experience life"?
I think happiness is something personal, and there isn't something like my happiness is better than yours.
Thankful for this discussion. I'm glad for the varied points of views from the 4 hosts, although I agree with some and disagree with some, I like that it questions why I think in a certain way.
Although i am malaysian, i watch every single episode of the daily ketchup podcast, quality conversations, educational points made. keep it up!
The most amazing part is that the educational content is not boring at all! It's so entertaining to watch! Love TDK from 🇲🇾 too
I think everyone in life generally will meet that crisis that you will doubt yourself and miss the old happy-go-lucky person you were used to be.
I was just like Pat that I found myself unhappy that I am not as happy as I was back then. Stuck in that mindset really just not gonna help.
And other than keep learning stuff, we should also keep UN-learning stuff like unlearning the pursuit of happiness and stuff. It is very important that we reframe our mindset and perspectives so that happiness won't be the SOLE goal of your life. and money goal too
Good video! I think many whom has entered workforce for years, tend to forget/forgo real happiness. Many of them tag it under work which is not necessary healthy. I recognized that there needs to be a shift as I did try office work, but feels that it is not what I pursue. Thus I am now looking for something that I fit in and also fits me
Thank you for making this video and also sincerely sharing your personal experiences. The viewers can tell when it is real and sincere. I like how humorous you guys are but at the same time display intellect and maturity. Pat should be made a full time part of this show. And lastly it is really very refreshing for once to have a talk show that does not resort to using sex to sell. Bravo guys. Keep it up.
aye
i relate to Pat's pursuit of happiness crippling her so much. Teared a couple times too because Jon advices just like my partner but I still find it hard to digest and believe what he says, because of my fear of uncertainty. Watched this episode once but decided to rewatch it again right after and start a notebook on things i've learnt from podcasts etc. because I really want to retain what I've learnt from this podcast episode especially. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for creating the daily ketchup podcast.
Such a great episode! I really look up and love how John & Pat go through their rs together
I’ve really enjoyed watching this episode. From these discussions about happiness, it made me realized that life is really a journey for us.
Some spend their lives pursuing on goals thinking that it is the very thing to make them be happy. Yet, there will always be the very next thing to work towards to when we realized that what we achieved /accomplish wasn’t really what we want.
At the end of the day we are just blindly chasing on things and dreams without truly understanding the deeper meaning of why we are setting up for such a goal. In reality, we just want to be in the state of emotional freedom.
Instead of constantly thinking of things like, if I have these amount of money, I will no longer be worrying over money, yet when you earned enough, you start to worry about losing money.
Hence, like what was mentioned in the video, it is important to learned more about ourselves through those life experiences, and to accept/forgive things that has happened in the past. That way, we will no longer be bugged by those unpleasant feelings, constantly finding ways to make us feel more fulfilled or less anxious (Somewhere along the line, at least in my interpretation…lol)
Why must your definition of happiness be a yardstick for other people? Is screwing screws for 60 years lower than you who do a startup?
Everybody is entitled to their own type of happiness, just like how i start my day...
"Getting up everyday and looking forward to drink a cup of coffee has already made my day HAPPY"
and as a human being, we're forgetful at times...
Drinking coffee makes me happy overall :D
I think that many people chase after set outcomes thinking that would be the best measure of happiness/success and very often they don't realise why being in that chase doesn't actually bring you contentment/fulfilment.
I used to cry before and during every flight like Pat and i felt so miserable, blaming myself for the choices I made which landed me in that state. But once I realised if I make every decision whilst being present and actually happy with that choice when deciding on it, not focusing on how the future outcome has to indefinitely be, I became a lot more content and generally a lot happier because I choose things that make me happy in the moment.
I think the key is to live feeling content and not try and chase happiness.
Thank you for this very introspective episode.
I really like how jon is very neutral and admitting the reality.
I don’t really like the feeling of happiness, that feeling is like the calm before the storm
Happiness is a choice. Many people have the illusions that he or she can only be happy in the future, or when certain milestones are accomplished. But in reality, it is the present moment that you should be happy about. I am grateful for being alive today. It is my joy and pleasure to live another wonderful day.
Itachi quotes right there HAHHA
John and Pat have the very couple smile leh. So cute :3
JP made the most sense tbh
Wow I shocked at the amount of good constructive comments there are for this episode. Y'all doing great podcasts, keep it up!
I just discovered you guys last week. I am a Singaporean living in aussie for about 5 years. U guys make me wanna quit my job here and just go back to Singapore to drive grab! So i can have my daily laksa and my rant with my family and friends. Also.... you guys really put on amazing content and i love the banter. Well done u lot! Pride and joy of Singapore la!
I'm always learning and growing something every single episode. Thank you.
For the algo
24:22 Pat looking at John spitting facts yo awww
I highly suggest reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k by Mark Manson, and The Obstacle Is The Way by Ryan Holiday. Both books have given me a COMPLETLEY NEW/DIFFERENT perspective on life. Please read it if you haven't! :D
There is a saying that "You could have all the money in the world, but if you can't find happiness in it... certainly there's no point"
It is so nice to hear a frank and open conversation. I share the opinion that life is diverse, rich, and often unfathomable to human imagination. Hence, no matter which decision or life path you take, as long as you own it, you will be contented.
Some really good takeaways here and can identify with Patrina as someone also reevaluating his life. Thanks for the perspective!
if you are grateful of what you already have, you'll always be happy no matter how much or little you have...
Can't believe I watched through 40 mins of this. Great content!
It's important to realised that Happiness, Sadness, satisfaction or otherwise are never permanent. They all come and go. Thus any survey should be looked upon as a survey and taken with a pinch of salt....If you're really interested maybe check out the Teachings in the "Diamond Sutra" and the "Heart Sutra".
Could you share which book is Jon Paul talking about regarding the Dopamine? thank you!
Jon Paul is a wise man.
"6.23 out of 10 is very good" - sounds like how we report every other KPI 😂
Totally agree with Pat. Singaporeans complain even when the Govt assist the les fortunate.
Be content. Live within your means & you will be happy.☺️
It's not about the government. Self actualisation is beyond all the ppl around u.
Nobody can help you. Only you can strive for that. Even if the world falls on sg tmr, only u have the power to control ur mindset so the gov is not impt here. The gov is just one of the pawns in the larger board game we call life as we strive towards actualisation
Happiness is to be content with ourselves, without the reassurance or love of another person.
I suppose one will feel happy when they can sleep well without attacks from gulity conscious at night... Wealth level is secondary.
There are organisations like NCSS who approves grants to social organisations, that require business/accounting/finanace/project skills. Im sure out there, you can find some meaning to your job that provides more than an income (also i currently dont work in these places but it might be something i will consider)
Algo!!!! 🤣
What does it mean tho? Algorithm?!
HI!!!!!! I love yall so much, always love the content you bring to us! ❤️
The 'Land of Smiles' label applies to tourists only, by the way ... how can the citizens of Thailand be happy when they've went through Thaksin and coups ...
This topic resonates with me. It's close to 8pm now and I'm barely halfway through my work for the day. Am I lazy? A strawberry? Or is burnout real?
Thanks for being vulnerable John
My favourite TDK podcast so far. Love it!
Thsi channel deserves more attention!
This ep really hit close to home sia
Omg this is too relatable. My situation is exactly like Pat's. Thank you guys for making this video.
throwing the ball here to see what kind of response will i get.
So if you have not bad boss, colleague, decent salary and benefit ... But doing the same things for many years and no sense of belonging.. Would your quit your job to explore new challenges etc ?
after a while you start questioning why you're doing what you're doing. Then its time to go.
Keep up the amazing work! Thank you for your hard work, dedication, passion and determination! All the best! 😀
21:30 John speaking out facts
Can't we be contented and ambitious at the same time?
Also happiness this thing very difficult to define becos everyone has different perspectives, definition and level of happiness.
If u ask me am I happy to be Singaporean my answer is yes. If u ask me am I happy to live in singapore my answer is also yes.
If u ask me am I happy in life my answer is most of the time I'm happy. Becos where got everyday happy one. Life sure got ups and downs.
enjoyed this authentic ep! jiayou to pat and thanks again tdk for an amazing ep!!! commenting for algp but also love yall 💗💗
Can you do one on pressure to get married, staying single and loneliness?
Be grateful
Can y’all do an episode about euphoria please? The shows message on drugs, abuse, etcccc
I watch this a few times.
That financial services salary just hits different.... that being said I know buldge bracket IB people making 5 figures as a fresh grad quitting a few years in cause the demands and hours arent sustainable
12:35 level of contentment
I LOVE THE THUMBSUP At 20:00
Hi Guys, why dont you do one episode where the topic is about the service industry in Singapore? Restaurant, hotels and such.
How the pandemic has affected its staff, overall operations and how bad is the attitude of customers towards waiters and waitress?
Maybe its time we talked about how people should behave and their attitude towards service staff?
Interestingly The Great Resignation wasn't brought up on this episode, strange phenomenon in our current pandemic, seems like a boundless topic.
Is there a topic about job hopping/job hopper?
Best episode so far!
thank you
8:20 John truth bomb again
cooking is like my whole life passion and as a chef not pegging my level of happiness to work is like...so impossible :(
Why is this not on Spotify?
17:45 Learnt something new! :D
generally ppl here are self-entitled, pwning each other, etc that ends up making work culture toxic which passes down gen to gen
Be it a compliment or creepy comment, but I can't take my eyes off Pat !!
Not happy doesn’t mean sad right?
13:43 if you are content/happy in your bubble, why bother doing other stuff to experience?
What JonPaul meant is happiness shouldn't be just 1 kind of fulfillment in life, if that bubble breaks, you will go into depression / sadness. Try to experience many kinds of happiness so that even if you happen to lose 1 kind, you have other forms of happiness to hold on to.
Tbh, JonPaul undoubtly make the most sense in this video whilst Jon somewhat relates to it.
wow I really hope Gary vee was here in this ep!!
Welcome to delhi ketsuuuppp...
😍
9:22 the sweet isn’t as sweet without the bitter
We cannot compare our level of happiness compared to someone who doesn't live the same lifestyle as us. Office worker vs farmer. A farmer puts a chicken on the dinner table for his family may have a higher happiness level compared to a father buying an iPhone for his child...#justsaying