"I can't breathe, it's a disease, It's a weakness. I'm staring at this bottle of pills like I need it" Dude... Anyone who has dealt with depression... That line hits hard.
Thank you, Merkules, for honoring the memory of Chester Bennington. I'm 14 days away from 2 years clean and sober and I deal with anxiety, bipolar disorder, depression and PTSD every day. If anyone reading this is dealing with the same issues and needs to talk to somebody about it, please don't hesitate to ask for help.
Keep up the good work Homie. Just remember the battles you went through n all the various types of pain. Keep that as a reminder you DON'T wanna have to go to war again.
This man is definitely singing all the shit I been through and going through now. He knows how bad depression is, so I'm very thankful for Merkules music. It hits home
I totally agree. Every word. I loved That original by Linkin Park. Chester was great and so are you Merkules. Love both of y'all and this is THE SHIT.....❤️
It says y'all left your comments around a year ago so upon reading them both just now, & just recently stepping down off the metaphorical ledge onto safe ground, after spending much of the past year closer than ever to deleting my subscription to L🧬FE, I figured it wouldn't hurt to briefly write this to both of you with the Sincere Hopes & Prayers that This Reply of mine reaches BOTH of YOU, A.S.A.P. (It's now 0245 hours, a.k.a. 2:45 A.M., Central daylight savings time, Sweet Home ALABAMA, Friday, February 09, 2024 Hope y'all are okay and safe and more importantly, in a better head space than before....
From a Linkin Park fan and someone who has suffered from depression and anxiety... Thank You It's people like you that help people like us because no one else gets us because they have no idea what it's like to fight with themselves
Billy I'm stiff suffering no one understands any tips on how to keep going even to explain to the ones closest all I see is the rain no one can see or feel my pain I'm not myself anymore like the lyrics on this tune
Being diagnosed with bipolar, panic/anxiety disorder ocd and ADHD this song basically tells the story of anyone's life who deals with mental illness and addiction, Merk I give mad respect for this shit this song is killer
Avery Clements ain't this very true i struggle with bipolar depression anxiety manic mania add adhd racing thoughts perania i fight demons every dam day i have tried suicide August 26th i am doing a suicide walk i do it every year i do it for me and my best friend and i am doing it for chester as well. mental health mental illness is no joke chester i will see you soon👼👼😭😭😢😢
Still get goosebumps every time I hear this remix. He nailed it. Thank you merkules for releasing all this relatable music. It helps so many of us cope.
People saying he needs to be signed .... we wouldn't hear this raw talent if he was signed... he would be forced to pump out mainstream chart music insted of these amazing lyrical masterpieces ... People just need to share merks music on every platform possible so everyone can bare witness to this song writing genius 🔥🔥
Facts!!!! I agree with u fam!! That's how fucked up the industry is, that's why we all hate it. But this guy just needs to keep doin' what he's doin' and maintain the integrity he's got dope lines. RIP Chester B, he'll be so proud.
TDOTZFINEST420 but the pain dont stop, it just gets passed around to the people who care about you and love you. Chris's death hurt but chester's fucked with me. Iv listen to this man tell his story since i was in middle school... im Truly sorry everyone
So I found this song after I had popped some pills and drank till I was numb after my wife left with the kids. I had planned on pulling the trigger but this song literally brought me back. I owe my life to the line "I'm staring at this bottle of pills like I need this" . Thank you merk
I suffered from addiction (in recovery now) and still suffer from depression... I know you're comment was 7 months ago, but I hope you're doing well bro. It's hard dealing with these things, but just know you're not alone. Their are many of us and you don't have to face it alone! Keep your head up
It's been 7 months, but they've been the best 7 months of my life. I can't believe I was contemplating the unthinkable. I'm not saying it was easy, but I'm so happy I'm still here. To you, and anyone else, that are battling your demons; keep going. Keep fighting. Its worth it, it's worth every agonizing moment.
I can relate to this song wayyy too much. God bless anyone who's battling depression, anxiety, ptsd, or all of the above. I have been having trouble putting the bottle down, and Merk has helped me keep my sanity. I've been drinking less everyday and soon will be free of alcohol. God bless you all
Now "In the end" your body is "Numb" but you have "No more sorrow". "Breaking the Habit" was difficult for you but you were always "One step closer". Your voice will be always "Crawling" on me "From the Inside" till the day I "Bleed it Out" and "Faint"
Ongg I used to struggle of what your going what helped me was mental health by TylerHatesLife that song helped me get better g stay strong 💯💯💯 keep your head up
Thank you for this, it's beautiful. I've suffered from depression and social anxiety since I was a kid, LP and Korn got me through a lot, I cried when I heard of Chester's suicide. I've felt that suicidal feeling before, it's an awful spot to be in, and I ache at the fact that Chester's voice and music helped so many of us kids take a breather from our depression and our bad spots in life and try to cope/heal, yet no one could do that for him. I wish we the fans could have done for him what he did for so many of us.....
So Young Moon trust me we did everything we could i think Chester had no other way. i hope that your ok i wish you all the best in life dont let ya self down.
no offence but you cant sit around expecting people to feel sorry for you or even feeling sorry for yourself for tht matter you just gotta take what ever life throws at you good or bad no matter how much negative stuff goes on in your life something positive always comes out of it in the end
John Alexander your the kinda person i wish could feel what other people feel. Honestly what would you do if your own blood came to you and say hey im lost in my thoughts i cant control my own mind i just want it all to end. And you respond with it's ok champ just look for the positive. Look for the fucking positive when you feel that the world is sucking you dry and there is no one in the world that can safe you from the prison that is your mind. What if he went off and blew his head off because could never find the positive. How would you than view life Mr. Alexander most likely bury your self in some sort of hate filled depression do to the fact that your blood could never find the "POSITIVE" so they ended them self. Im sure you have your issues and ways to cope with them open your fucking mind before you open your mouth.
When I was younger, I would listen to Chester sing and think, “He understands.” I looked at the lyrics to his songs and it felt like I wrote them. I haven’t felt that way listening to anything else for a long time, but after hearing your remix, I suddenly felt like I did when I was child... I mean this so sincerely- bless you, sir.
The Stapler why dose hell wait for him? Because a song touched him? I believe in our Lord and savior but I'm sure he's not going to send us to hell cuz we like merkules! Take your bullshit else where! My Lord is loving forgiving and caring! If u ask me he cried cuz God touched him while listening to this!
Started hearing merkules before he was called merkules then stopped listening or seeing his stuff for awhile then seen a rapper called merkules doing remixes then realised it was the same fella I heard doing carbars
Merk. I'm a metalhead and this was texted to me. I just wanna say that I'm deeply touched that you put the suicide prevention hotline on the screen for the last 30 seconds. We've lost too many! It means a lot that you did a tribute to Chester Bennington. I was basically raised on Linkin park and Kraft Dinner. Thank you. R.I.P Chester Bennington, you will be missed!
Thank you Mercules, this just got sent to me. It's like you can see inside my head. To everyone who struggles, keep fighting! Life IS worth it! ❤ RIP Chester ❤
This song saved me and got me thru some dark times... Felt alone.. Hears this song.. Gave me hope knowing that I'm not alone that its not just me... That someone else can relate...
How is this guy not signed??? I don’t get it, he’s not just trying to rhyme he’s speaking gut wrenching reality!!! Cmon who agrees with me here, please??
Some of these dudes have figured outhow to win without getting signed , and then they able to stay true to themselves... It's no coincidence that some of the best in the game right now don't have no label being puppet master. I hope they never sign, fuck a 360 deal, fuck being censored...
I'm 14 months clean of that devil in a bag ," Methamphetamine ". Stay strong and find someone you can totally trust and who can relate to to talk and hang out with who is clean n sober. Screw everything and everyone else who talking smack. If they can't relate they opinions and words r irrelevant. God bless you
LYRICS: I find it hard for me to follow my dreams 'cause I get caught up in the drama 'till it's harder to breathe I'm starin' right at my reflection and it's not even me I got these voices in my head and I can't silence their screams Just hauntin' my dreams I wonder if it's only myself But as I take a look around I see nobody else Can't talk about it to my homies 'cause my homies won't help They'll act like they give a fuck but they don't know how it felt So I just keep actin' like it's all okay, this bottled pain has got me feelin' hollow again Everyday I wake up and it's just makin' me stressed I take a deep breath, it's not me, maybe it's them I don't wanna crack a smile, so I'm crackin' a bottle Look past for the sorrow, I know won't be happy tomorrow That's fine, all that really matter to me is right now So if you're lookin' for me I'm at home with the lights out I'm still findin' ways for me to deal with the pain It makes me wonder if they care if they don't see me again Nobody wants to hear about so I keep it contained It takes a lot of late nights for me to see through the rain Because I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore Back in school I was one of the cool kids Now I'm the quiet type and I'm ready to lose it I'm sick of hopin' for better, man, it's only excuses When did it start happenin'? I never would choose this We all human and we all feel emotion but mine are stronger than others and so it's harder to cope with, it's causin' commotion This weed got me coughing and choking, I'm on this boat all alone and I ain't got shit to row with I'm lost in the moment, I'm trynna find a way to explain it I'm waiting so patient, these hangovers makin' me crazy I'm havin' dreams of me doin' things that I'd never do Am I in Hell cause this ain't Heaven can't I find out the truth? There's a part of my brain that I wish I could remove If you were me you'd probably lie to you too I over think then over drink when I ain't got shit to do I'm sprawled out across the coach and I'm not gonna move Because I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore Anymore Everyday there's new pain inflicted, and when I'm drunk I'm convinced one day you'll get it But you don't, so in the morning I deal with the disappointment Another day, another search for enjoyment It's annoying but I made this bed for me to sleep in I see everybody else on the shore when I'm in the deep end I can't breathe, it's a disease, it's a weakness I'm starin' at this bottle full of pills like "I need this" I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore Anymore...
A few mouths ago I was depressed and just getting sober from coke, molly n booze n starting on medication for my mental health. I was lost in my life and was very close to suicide. I was sick of the constant struggle i was dealing with for years n im only 19 i lost almost everything i love with out the help of my family and ur music i would have never made it thanks
From an addict in recovery thankyou. You can beat the beast my friend,if I can do it,anyone can do it brother. I couldn't imagine going through a day without using something. I would sit and think how the hell am I ever gonna get through a day without altering my feelings. Just lost my little sister to an overdose too. Lost 8 close friends to heroin. Where I live it is an epidemic. I'm in Greenfield Massachusetts. My life is so depressing but I concisely make an effort to try and be happy ,but as you know it's a daily struggle. Sometimes I just want to give up but at the same time I'm scared of death. I miss my little sis. If you EVER need an ear merk I'm here brother, I hope all goes well for you and you find some peace of mind. 🙏🙏🤝🤝💯👍♥️
Bruh, addict in recovery is a stupid ass word. You either quit using or your still using. Recovery? Thats just a word that means your still addicted but trying to quit. You will relapse if you think your recovering. Iv stopped, but i dont post about it.
@@iamthezombiemasterFuckdaPolice my man you have no clue obviously. People go through recovery for years upon years. 8 years clean from shooting cocaine and heroin. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about how I almost lost my life to the struggle. So yeah we recover everyday from the demons that try to hold us down. Millions don't see this day and that's on everything I know and love!
I gotta say man, I'm no rap expert or a super fan I'm just a 50 yr metal head, and this mix hit me hard, to say i relate wouldn't be enough, it's beyond relate to it and edging on identify to it, so much so when you spoke of dreaming of doing things you would never do I almost got sick it tore into me that deep, after 10 years filled with nightmares even my psychologist couldn't grasp or put a name to other then to call it complicated nightmare disorder I felt like you knew something they don't and I couldn't ever manage to explain or properly convey to anybody and never believed anybody else ever could because it had to just be me ... I caught this song brothrler at a time that this thing in my life was becoming to big for me to carry... and then suddenly I wasn't carrying It, after 10 years it was still there and still is but it doesn't tax me and ride on my back like it did, it doesn't weigh on me it just follows me.... and that really sucks, but I can do it, I haven't got a choice but to do it but I need you to hear this, its because of you that it's survivable right now and your remix that I listen to again to lighten everything I'm bearing the weight of when I get tired, it's a remix of a song that you gave such reality to that I didn't fall that day, because of it wasn't that day I don't believe I would have made the rest of the week.... you'll probably never see or read this, but I'm pretty sure your so g had a big part to do with saving me, it's not the first time I've been there and probably not the last .. but at that time in my fight and on that occasion you made a fan of man that only planned to be an obituary. I share with others like me now, hoping to do the same for just one other person, someone that just needs not to be the only fucking one to be dealing with whatever it is there alone in, inherent always been a good person but I can atleast look at myself in the mirror and know who it is I'm looking at again and Know from the reflection that I can see and I can believe myself that I'm trying to be a good guy .. thank you for that, I've found alot of help in music these past few years thank to it all....CHEERS !
I find it hard for me to follow my dreams 'cause I get caught up in the drama 'till it's harder to breathe I'm starin' right at my reflection and it's not even me I got these voices in my head and I can't silence their screams It's hauntin' my dreams I wonder if it's only myself But as I take a look around I see nobody else Can't talk about it to my homies 'cause my homies won't help They act like they give a fuck but they don't know how it felt So I just keep actin' like it's all okay, this bottled up pain got me feelin' hallow again Everyday I wake up and it's just makin' me stressed I take a deep breath, it's not me, maybe it's them I don't wanna crack a smile, so I'm crackin' a bottle A past full of sorrow, I know won't be happy tomorrow That's fine, all that really matter to me is right now So if you're lookin' for me I'm at home with the lights out I'm still findin' ways for me to deal with the pain It makes me wonder do they care if they won't see me again Nobody wants to hear about it so I keep it contained It takes a lot of late nights for me to see through the rain Because.. [Hook] I'm not myself, I'm not myself I'm not myself, anymore.. I'm not myself, I'm not myself I'm not myself, anymore.. Verse 2] Back in school I was one of the cool kids but now I'm the quiet type and I'm ready to lose it I'm sick of hopin' for better, man, it's only excuses Wanna to start happening it I never would choose this We all human and we all feel emotion but mine are stronger than others and so it's harder to cope with, it's causin' commotion This weed got me coughing and choking, I'm on this boat all alone and I ain't got shit to row with I'm lost in the moment, I'm trynna find a way to explain I'm waiting so patient, these hangovers makin' me crazy I'm havin' dreams of me doin' things that I'd never do Am I in Hell cause this ain't Heaven can't I find out the truth? This is part of my brain that I wish I could remove If you were me you'd probably lie to you too I over think then over drink when I ain't got shit to do I'm sprawled out across the coach and I'm not gonna move Because.. [Hook 2] I'm not myself, I'm not myself I'm not myself, anymore.. I'm not myself, I'm not myself I'm not myself, anymore.. Anymore... [Verse 3] Everyday there's new pain inflicted, and when I'm drunk I'm convinced one day you'll get it But you don't, so in the morning I deal with a disappointment Another day, another search for enjoyment and it's annoying But I made this bed for me to sleep and I see everybody else on the shore when I'm in the deep end I can't breathe, it's a disease, it's a weakness I'm starin' at this bottle full of pills like I need it. Hook 3] I'm not myself, I'm not myself I'm not myself, anymore.. I'm not myself, I'm not myself I'm not myself, anymore.. Anymore... Anymore... Anymore... Anymore... Anymore... Anymore... Anymore...
It would be great if they collaborated, they both sub each other, wonder if they ever talked privately. Anyways hope both make it and help to bring rap back! I can't stand this new mumble, nigga, nigga, mumble crap from all these so called artist these days.
Merkules. Thank you for being real. You inspired me to write something. I'm no rapper, but it's something I needed to write and share. I've been dealing with depression for quite some time, I've been in chronic physical pain for a long time and at times it has sucked me under. I've had many thoughts of taking my life....So I can relate to what you say in your lyrics. You're not alone in this and know that things will get better. keep your head up and the bottle down my friend. Have faith. Lots of love. Thank you. Verse 1) I lay awake in my bed it feels harder to think, my minds playing tricks on me I'm starting to think. I'm on the brink of disasta I gotta move fasta somethings gotta give. Now I know what a drug addict feels like when he relapses collapse's, falls to the ground, needle in his arm as he tosses around. They say the calm before the storm, but all I feel is the storm. Hurricane carter I feel trapped and alone. I keep thinkin these thoughts that I don't wanna think. Gaspin for air and my chest cavin in, I'm only 29 but it feels like I'm dying within. No good morning only night terrors my good mornings turned to nightmares. I grit my teeth and lay awake in bed with this white stare. (Hook) I don't feel the way I use to use to, I wish things could go back the way they use to, use to. I just want to feel me feel me, is that to much to ask.... FEEL ME? Verse 2) They say make the days count, but I'm just countin the days another search for enjoyment as time passes away. When you get a glimpse of it you want it to stay, some happiness, joy, bliss, but only the reminder of pain. This shits gettin uncomfortable day after day. No rest, I can't even close my eyes, because every time I do I feel like apart of me dies, crys, sighs, it feels like I'm slowly dying inside. Always a new pain, something to worry about, I try to speak these words and tears pour out of my mouth. I can't figure it out!! They say feel what you feel don't keep anything down, somthin your repressin stressin about, but all this confusion is causin depression. WHY CAN"T YOU FIGURE IT OUT!!? Until you get the lesson it's not goin to stop, but how do you find the bottom if you can't find the start! (Hook) Verse 3) Pain grippin me I'm back at it again, like an addict, manic split personality man. What the fuck is wrong with me 5 fukin years delain with this shit, I've tried to quit. Many times I've tried to talk to my friends, but know one can really see the pain that I'm in. Guilt, burden, I've touched on them all, but thank god gods with me, so I don't have to cry it alone, die on my own. Moan.... Grone... 3 in the morning I keep tossin and turnin, I need someone to come take away this depression and worry. Pain is a funny thing, it doesn't leave you alone, but nothing funny about it, it stays right behind you and follows you home, you can't get away, darkness is all that you see.... So in the end I cover my face with these white faded sheets..... (Hook) End.
JD C Brilliant Barz the struggle is real many feel the pain I loved reading these lyrics as much as I love listening to the big man himself long live Merkules
My depression feels like I don't even exist, nobody listens, I'm one of the see-through people. Going outside is hard, getting up to go to work is hard, eating and brushing my teeth is hard, not reaching for the bottle every night is hard.
I think this is such an awesome tribute.So sad about Chester.💔 Ignore the asshole comments. My friend met you this weekend and she was so thrilled... keep doing what you do!
This totally blew me away and also destroyed my soul knowing Chester didn't see any other way out. RIP Chester, there will never be anyone else like you
Sam fovargue the greatest thing about music is the emotion and interpretation. People think it sucks, but as i sit in my car bottle in one hand gun 8n the other kicked to the curb by a crazy heartless butch, drunk high and feeling out of options, i geel this is on fucking par. Anybody who doesnt feel the same, who the fuck cares. Everyone arguing about unimportant bullshit. Good music is good music, regardless of genre. If you dont feel it, listen to domesthi g you do do feel. If there is nothing, then i feel bad for you becausevafter 30 years of hell, it would seem you feel less than me, which i feel almost impossuble. Fuck you, fuck them, fuckit fuck me fuck your mom, butmost importantly, always remember, fuck itsall, but life goes on.
Every single lyric hits hard for depression sufferers, pretty much rounds off depression as a whole... big eye opener for others who don't quite understand, but this song litterally puts it into words... much love 🙏
Wow.... That was one of the toughest remixes I've ever and I mean ever, heard. Holy shit you did the damned thing merkules. Much love and respect and props. Rest in peace chester. May your soul find peace and happiness. That spoke deeply to me. Also rest in peace david seating. Whom that reminded me of so much. Love you brother and miss you.
Bro for real. I've got no clue how I stumbled upon this. I've been looking for years to find something like this. My guitar and your voice could definitely do something epic! Nice tribute. The pain of his loss is felt brother!
"On this boat all alone and I ain't got shit to row with" Man you are one hell of a great artist. My favorite part of the song by far because you snuck it in there with so much subtlety.
this remix is so fucking good, relatable and pure. Merkules is a true blessing for those who are struggling with things which make them depressed or suicidal. Music like this helps me against drowning in my darkest moments. So thank you, Merk. And for anyone reading this feeling like me, keep your head up. Even though I dont know you, I dont want to lose you. Better days will show up is what we need to believe although I dont feel like that rn.
Much respect brother. I lost my mom earlier this year after her long battle with cancer. I had depression before but nothing that was unmanageable (or so I thought) I was just a care free living 22 year old and I would deal with my problems later. After quitting my job, making money by other means from home, taking care of my mom, and watching my mom suffer for so long I feel I am lost and stuck in a place of mind that seems impossible to get out of. Also losing friends to manic attacks, O.D, and suicide in the same time frame. This cover and your anxiety rap especially hit home with me as I'm sure many other individuals. You have a gift. I like rap but have strayed away from what everyone's talking about in their music, because of what I just watched in your Panda remix. I've been searching for new music, stumbled upon easy mac, which I saw you pop up and have been bumping posting, and sharing your songs. Just trying to send the same message back to you that your music sent to me...you aren't alone. You lay your life out on the table, just showing the same back to you. Keep it up brother, much love, subscribed and can't wait to hear the future songs.
Johnny Water keep strong bro . I lost my mom to leukemia when I was 16 then my dad ditched me for another girl and moved to Ohio . Slept in the streets , park benches , drinking bottles of vodka , smokin a shit ton of meth . I still drink a little bit , but been clean off meth for 4 years , I got a job making about 25-30 grand a year enough to support myself in California , barely scraping by but hey it’s something . Just keep your head up . We’re all in this together
Johnny Water I actually attempted suicide and was grateful when I woke up in he hospital . I swallowed a handful of acetaminophen . My friend showed up at my apartment , he had a key for it and he saw me on the ground and called 911 . I’m grateful I’m still alive
This song helped me through the worst time of my life. It still rings true to this day thank you for putting this together as fast and properly as you did it means the world to me and I share it with everyone. Putting the suicide hotline number on the end means the most to me and you have probably saved lives. I kicked fetty to this song thank you.!!
How did i just find this? Chester was and still is one my my Heroes and i was so depressed when he passed. You killed this beat man, i think Chester would have been so happy to hear this.
When I first found your music I didn't understand it but 9 year in & I'm starting to understand the lyrics more because I've came to realise that my mental health illnesses aren't leaving my mind or body soon & at first that was the hardest pill for me to swallow it cut deep so deep I ended binge drinking to cope with my illness but when I'm in my bedroom doing what I love doing which is helping others deal with their demons through making music about depression suicide & this fucking mental health disorder your a proper inspiration to me & the music I make & it gives me goosebumps coz everything you rap about is literally what most of the world feels or going through keep up the good work
Amazing, man! I've suffered from anxiety myself too, and it is such a weird state of mind to be in. You know something is wrong, you know what you think is stupid and shouldn't be that way, but still you can't control it. Stay strong man, you'll get through it!
This song literally saved my life. 4/25/18, I had a loaded gun in my hand ready to kill myself because i lost everything. I heard this remix on facebook and your lyrics hit me so hard i couldnt even bring the gun to my head. But as of 3/20/19, I now have a great job, great friends that actually have my back, and im actually happy with my life. I cant thank you enough merk for writing this remix. You can know now that you did save at least one life with your music.
And THIS is my favorite remix you have done. I would do anything to hear you do this live. What an amazing job honering this song and Chester, he would love this man. You should be proud, deeply. 🙏
Chester would definitely be honored that you, Merkules, would do what your good at to one of the greatest tracks from back in the day! With this track comes alot of memories, good, bad & definitely the younger days, which is priceless! Thank you.. R. I. P CHESTER ✌
This day broke my heart what was left of it Chester stopped my wrists from bleeding thank you for this u saved my life remember waking up to this song and realizing what happened half way threw ure song I might have lookin myself if it wasnt 4 you thank you ....
*That was an amazing mix and hit hard.* The loss of Chester is one that hits harder than any other artist for me personally. It still doesn't feel real... His last tracks hit so much deeper now.
"I can't breathe, it's a disease, It's a weakness. I'm staring at this bottle of pills like I need it" Dude... Anyone who has dealt with depression... That line hits hard.
Yup... Star at them all the time. 9 IB will be the last headache ever.
Just for todat
Only for today
Yeah for real This song and anxiety hit really close to home
So fucking true
Merkules is more than a rapper, he is a next level lyricist. He doesn't just spit what will fit, he has something to say and says it.
Truedat
First song I've found by him, definitely will be looking out more
Dude havana by him says it all. He is insane!
@@colinreid7259
9l90
ho lol
m
0l
lm
Milll
L mom oil
@@diannacail7714 ok ha
Thank you, Merkules, for honoring the memory of Chester Bennington. I'm 14 days away from 2 years clean and sober and I deal with anxiety, bipolar disorder, depression and PTSD every day. If anyone reading this is dealing with the same issues and needs to talk to somebody about it, please don't hesitate to ask for help.
Don't let those insecurities or things diagnose hinder your growth or potential ***
@@sWiGgLeR5792 , thanks.
The power is within us All. Look inside to the light the shines for everyone to see
8 months later, hope you are still doing well. Stay strong, brother.
Keep up the good work Homie. Just remember the battles you went through n all the various types of pain. Keep that as a reminder you DON'T wanna have to go to war again.
This man is definitely singing all the shit I been through and going through now. He knows how bad depression is, so I'm very thankful for Merkules music. It hits home
I totally agree. Every word. I loved That original by Linkin Park. Chester was great and so are you Merkules. Love both of y'all and this is THE SHIT.....❤️
It says y'all left your comments around a year ago so upon reading them both just now, & just recently stepping down off the metaphorical ledge onto safe ground, after spending much of the past year closer than ever to deleting my subscription to L🧬FE, I figured it wouldn't hurt to briefly write this to both of you with the Sincere Hopes & Prayers that
This Reply of mine reaches BOTH of YOU, A.S.A.P. (It's now 0245 hours, a.k.a. 2:45 A.M., Central daylight savings time, Sweet Home ALABAMA, Friday, February 09, 2024
Hope y'all are okay and safe and more importantly, in a better head space than before....
From a Linkin Park fan and someone who has suffered from depression and anxiety... Thank You
It's people like you that help people like us because no one else gets us because they have no idea what it's like to fight with themselves
Billy same bro I can relate 100%
Billy Amen ain't this true
Find something that drives you! Use it as a weapon!
Billy I'm stiff suffering no one understands any tips on how to keep going even to explain to the ones closest all I see is the rain no one can see or feel my pain I'm not myself anymore like the lyrics on this tune
So ture
Depression feels like you're not living, you're just existing
This hit me hard. I know exactly how that feels.
If more understood this there'd be less stigma. This hit hard man, everything alright?
Exactly!
100%
Feel that in my soul man
Being diagnosed with bipolar, panic/anxiety disorder ocd and ADHD this song basically tells the story of anyone's life who deals with mental illness and addiction, Merk I give mad respect for this shit this song is killer
Avery Clements ain't this very true i struggle with bipolar depression anxiety manic mania add adhd racing thoughts perania i fight demons every dam day i have tried suicide August 26th i am doing a suicide walk i do it every year i do it for me and my best friend and i am doing it for chester as well. mental health mental illness is no joke chester i will see you soon👼👼😭😭😢😢
Avery Clements sounds like you need to hit a blunt brother
Are we twins?... feeling the devil today....
Avery Clements Smoke WEEEED!!! MEDITATE! You can change it... Lay off pills
No doubt Rob. Helps for sure. Btw, I have all of the above. So fuck yeah I get it.
Still get goosebumps every time I hear this remix. He nailed it. Thank you merkules for releasing all this relatable music. It helps so many of us cope.
💯
People saying he needs to be signed .... we wouldn't hear this raw talent if he was signed... he would be forced to pump out mainstream chart music insted of these amazing lyrical masterpieces ... People just need to share merks music on every platform possible so everyone can bare witness to this song writing genius 🔥🔥
FormalB
Real talk sun,str8 up and down like 6 o'clock.
Whud these catz noggin thinkn smh
True true he is one of the best I've heard in a long time
FormalB true but if a good label signed him like strange music he could be true to his music and have a larger platform
Facts!!!! I agree with u fam!! That's how fucked up the industry is, that's why we all hate it. But this guy just needs to keep doin' what he's doin' and maintain the integrity he's got dope lines. RIP Chester B, he'll be so proud.
FormalB u aint lying signed artist are forced to water down there real shit💯💯💯💯
No one wants to die, they just want the pain to stop. #RIPCHESTER
TDOTZFINEST420 Very true
TDOTZFINEST420 but the pain dont stop, it just gets passed around to the people who care about you and love you. Chris's death hurt but chester's fucked with me. Iv listen to this man tell his story since i was in middle school... im Truly sorry everyone
+Dick Head sorry bro it was to easy
Word man!
Life is painful but suffering is a choice
So I found this song after I had popped some pills and drank till I was numb after my wife left with the kids. I had planned on pulling the trigger but this song literally brought me back. I owe my life to the line "I'm staring at this bottle of pills like I need this" . Thank you merk
I suffered from addiction (in recovery now) and still suffer from depression... I know you're comment was 7 months ago, but I hope you're doing well bro. It's hard dealing with these things, but just know you're not alone. Their are many of us and you don't have to face it alone! Keep your head up
It's been 7 months, but they've been the best 7 months of my life. I can't believe I was contemplating the unthinkable. I'm not saying it was easy, but I'm so happy I'm still here. To you, and anyone else, that are battling your demons; keep going. Keep fighting. Its worth it, it's worth every agonizing moment.
I'm proud of you for making the right choice.
I know the feeling
Good shit brother we have ALL been in that position. God bless
I can relate to this song wayyy too much. God bless anyone who's battling depression, anxiety, ptsd, or all of the above. I have been having trouble putting the bottle down, and Merk has helped me keep my sanity. I've been drinking less everyday and soon will be free of alcohol. God bless you all
It's been a long time since I listen to this beat.. brings back memories. Where's my 80's-90's babies?
REAl REAction right here
REAl REAction 80s baby in the house. been kicking since 84.
REAl REAction right here man
REAl REAction since 89
YOU ARE NOT MY DADDY
Now "In the end" your body is "Numb" but you have "No more sorrow".
"Breaking the Habit" was difficult for you but you were always "One step
closer". Your voice will be always "Crawling" on me "From the Inside"
till the day I "Bleed it Out" and "Faint"
“Nobody wants to hear so I keep it contained” that hits close to home
John Haze that's a lie cause he made this song crying about how his ovaries hurt
@@cetantheweedman3313 fuckin grade a prick!
Cetan TheWeedMan clown
I love what merc did one of my family tried to kill himself when chester did. Awesome on the hotline number thanks Cole
If u can’t handle the pain then is better to forget
I struggle everyday with depression and suicidal thoughts. Merkules and a few others with songs like this help me to make it one more day.
Ongg I used to struggle of what your going what helped me was mental health by TylerHatesLife that song helped me get better g stay strong 💯💯💯 keep your head up
How's it brother? Seeing your comment just now. Hadnt been on this video in a while. Going thru withdrawals again. Trying to beat this fkn crap
This is so good. Anyone else just finding this?
Yes mate, glad I did tho
yes, popped up on my home page.
Nah, started listening right after it dropped
Hahahahaha wow man! I can't believe your just finding this!! This song is the best!!!!!
Yes!
Thank you for this, it's beautiful. I've suffered from depression and social anxiety since I was a kid, LP and Korn got me through a lot, I cried when I heard of Chester's suicide. I've felt that suicidal feeling before, it's an awful spot to be in, and I ache at the fact that Chester's voice and music helped so many of us kids take a breather from our depression and our bad spots in life and try to cope/heal, yet no one could do that for him. I wish we the fans could have done for him what he did for so many of us.....
So Young Moon trust me we did everything we could i think Chester had no other way. i hope that your ok i wish you all the best in life dont let ya self down.
no offence but you cant sit around expecting people to feel sorry for you or even feeling sorry for yourself for tht matter you just gotta take what ever life throws at you good or bad no matter how much negative stuff goes on in your life something positive always comes out of it in the end
John Alexander so ignorant
John Alexander your the kinda person i wish could feel what other people feel. Honestly what would you do if your own blood came to you and say hey im lost in my thoughts i cant control my own mind i just want it all to end. And you respond with it's ok champ just look for the positive. Look for the fucking positive when you feel that the world is sucking you dry and there is no one in the world that can safe you from the prison that is your mind. What if he went off and blew his head off because could never find the positive. How would you than view life Mr. Alexander most likely bury your self in some sort of hate filled depression do to the fact that your blood could never find the "POSITIVE" so they ended them self. Im sure you have your issues and ways to cope with them open your fucking mind before you open your mouth.
he didnt commit suicide, he was murdered, dont believe all of what the media lets you think is true
I know I'm late but,
MERK, Chester would be proud
Shucks, Chester sends out love every time someone feels this dime.
x a million likes
Yes he would. This song is great. I love both of y'all
What an amazing rendition. What a way to pay respect to the late-great Chester Bennington.
When I was younger, I would listen to Chester sing and think, “He understands.” I looked at the lyrics to his songs and it felt like I wrote them. I haven’t felt that way listening to anything else for a long time, but after hearing your remix, I suddenly felt like I did when I was child... I mean this so sincerely- bless you, sir.
That made me cry, I actually could relate to that. Dude, this is one of the best tributes I've heard so far! 😭😢😭😢
Krizz N9ne don't cry homie. hang in the technician
Krizz N9ne don't cry hell awaits you..... Repent my dude....
Could've been better.
Krizz N9ne ditto homie! Stay strong brother things can only get better from here!
The Stapler why dose hell wait for him? Because a song touched him? I believe in our Lord and savior but I'm sure he's not going to send us to hell cuz we like merkules! Take your bullshit else where! My Lord is loving forgiving and caring! If u ask me he cried cuz God touched him while listening to this!
amazing tribute
respect for this
he'll truly be missed by so many, but his voice, lyrics & music will live on, forever.
R.I.P Chester
This...hit home harder than I thought it would.
From one legend for another
Darion Hackman straight up
Darion Hackman
*
Just started listening to merkules today and I'm hooked
MIKE BARKETT did you listen to the acctual song if not then listen it’s good
Same
Started hearing merkules before he was called merkules then stopped listening or seeing his stuff for awhile then seen a rapper called merkules doing remixes then realised it was the same fella I heard doing carbars
Start listening today along with AK can't deny real lyricism
Right on thx
Merk. I'm a metalhead and this was texted to me. I just wanna say that I'm deeply touched that you put the suicide prevention hotline on the screen for the last 30 seconds. We've lost too many! It means a lot that you did a tribute to Chester Bennington. I was basically raised on Linkin park and Kraft Dinner. Thank you. R.I.P Chester Bennington, you will be missed!
Kyle Thurmeier Kraft Dinner and Linkin Park, the ones that really raised us
Thank you Mercules, this just got sent to me. It's like you can see inside my head. To everyone who struggles, keep fighting! Life IS worth it! ❤ RIP Chester ❤
"I don't want to crack a smile, I want to crack a bottle"
Holy shit.
man you butchered the hell out of that line but yea it was a cold line for sure
Dont ever change man. Stay real.
stEvo lution
*Cheers*
love your picture
Anxiety, depression,and ADHD this song hits home, listen to this once a week Keep it up Merkules.... real artist!
This song saved me and got me thru some dark times... Felt alone.. Hears this song.. Gave me hope knowing that I'm not alone that its not just me... That someone else can relate...
Cheers bud
How is this guy not signed??? I don’t get it, he’s not just trying to rhyme he’s speaking gut wrenching reality!!! Cmon who agrees with me here, please??
That's exactly why he hasn't been signed, he won't sell as well as 'hoes and gold' style rapping...
Triple positive Merk just doesnt want to sign at all. He could have awhile ago.
Some of these dudes have figured outhow to win without getting signed , and then they able to stay true to themselves... It's no coincidence that some of the best in the game right now don't have no label being puppet master. I hope they never sign, fuck a 360 deal, fuck being censored...
I live in the same city. They have a label locally. Take care of their own around here. Keeps the vultures away.
He actually released something under Death Row Records for Snoop
Merk you are so fucking unreal. So much respect for you. RIP Chester Linkin Park was my childhood sound.
I'm 14 months clean of that devil in a bag ," Methamphetamine ". Stay strong and find someone you can totally trust and who can relate to to talk and hang out with who is clean n sober. Screw everything and everyone else who talking smack. If they can't relate they opinions and words r irrelevant. God bless you
in a few days ill be clean 4 years bro I'm fuckn wit you daily
if it doesn't kill you it makes you more bad ass don't bitch out
DOUG BROWN Congratulations brother. I’m one clean off of meth.... in my mind meth is the worst drug on earth
I’m 26 years clean, and I’m 26..
16 months Clean n sober but Who is counting Right??? I am but really I should have been doing this ALL along right. Be proud but not prideful.
LYRICS:
I find it hard for me to follow my dreams 'cause I get caught up in the drama 'till it's harder to breathe
I'm starin' right at my reflection and it's not even me
I got these voices in my head and I can't silence their screams
Just hauntin' my dreams I wonder if it's only myself
But as I take a look around I see nobody else
Can't talk about it to my homies 'cause my homies won't help
They'll act like they give a fuck but they don't know how it felt
So I just keep actin' like it's all okay, this bottled pain has got me feelin' hollow again
Everyday I wake up and it's just makin' me stressed
I take a deep breath, it's not me, maybe it's them
I don't wanna crack a smile, so I'm crackin' a bottle
Look past for the sorrow, I know won't be happy tomorrow
That's fine, all that really matter to me is right now
So if you're lookin' for me I'm at home with the lights out
I'm still findin' ways for me to deal with the pain
It makes me wonder if they care if they don't see me again
Nobody wants to hear about so I keep it contained
It takes a lot of late nights for me to see through the rain
Because
I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore
I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore
Back in school I was one of the cool kids
Now I'm the quiet type and I'm ready to lose it
I'm sick of hopin' for better, man, it's only excuses
When did it start happenin'? I never would choose this
We all human and we all feel emotion but mine are stronger than others and so it's harder to cope with, it's causin' commotion
This weed got me coughing and choking, I'm on this boat all alone and I ain't got shit to row with
I'm lost in the moment, I'm trynna find a way to explain it
I'm waiting so patient, these hangovers makin' me crazy
I'm havin' dreams of me doin' things that I'd never do
Am I in Hell cause this ain't Heaven can't I find out the truth?
There's a part of my brain that I wish I could remove
If you were me you'd probably lie to you too
I over think then over drink when I ain't got shit to do
I'm sprawled out across the coach and I'm not gonna move
Because
I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore
I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore
Anymore
Everyday there's new pain inflicted, and when I'm drunk I'm convinced one day you'll get it
But you don't, so in the morning I deal with the disappointment
Another day, another search for enjoyment
It's annoying but I made this bed for me to sleep in
I see everybody else on the shore when I'm in the deep end
I can't breathe, it's a disease, it's a weakness
I'm starin' at this bottle full of pills like "I need this"
I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore
I'm not myself, I'm not myself, I'm not myself, anymore
Anymore...
Sick
Yes
Tysfm for a listing of lyrics. You're awesome, needs more likes!
I think it's " a patch for the sorrow" as in patch it up
A few mouths ago I was depressed and just getting sober from coke, molly n booze n starting on medication for my mental health. I was lost in my life and was very close to suicide. I was sick of the constant struggle i was dealing with for years n im only 19 i lost almost everything i love with out the help of my family and ur music i would have never made it thanks
Damein Hume. never give up. your worth it
That fuckin hook is goosebump worthy
dude merk. that is what i needed. thank you. ur not alone. . we need to make a stompdown tour in the states happen. sdk ninja
James Forrest I fuckn agree with that
Made a lyric for this respectful tribute, please check it out!
this got to be the illest remix of this song ever! Merk you da man dawg! 2024.
BRILLIANT
CHESTER WOULD BE PROUD
Big respect from UK 👊
Linkin Park should meet up with you to play this live, in memory
yes!
Ryan DeuceDeuce yes
I agree, they really should do that!
That would be dope! Come on guys spread this shit!!!
Definitely should!!!
I wish this was available on Spotify. This remix hits deep.
This song makes me cry every time hits home...
I saw this for the first time right after he recorded it. I don't know how many times I've listened to it, it chokes me up every time.
First time listening in tears. Every part of it was too real but I still don't know what to do about it
From an addict in recovery thankyou. You can beat the beast my friend,if I can do it,anyone can do it brother. I couldn't imagine going through a day without using something. I would sit and think how the hell am I ever gonna get through a day without altering my feelings. Just lost my little sister to an overdose too. Lost 8 close friends to heroin. Where I live it is an epidemic. I'm in Greenfield Massachusetts. My life is so depressing but I concisely make an effort to try and be happy ,but as you know it's a daily struggle. Sometimes I just want to give up but at the same time I'm scared of death. I miss my little sis. If you EVER need an ear merk I'm here brother, I hope all goes well for you and you find some peace of mind. 🙏🙏🤝🤝💯👍♥️
Stay strong. Hope you're still doing well.
We are all brothers
Hope you still going strong bro.....
Bruh, addict in recovery is a stupid ass word. You either quit using or your still using. Recovery? Thats just a word that means your still addicted but trying to quit. You will relapse if you think your recovering. Iv stopped, but i dont post about it.
@@iamthezombiemasterFuckdaPolice my man you have no clue obviously. People go through recovery for years upon years. 8 years clean from shooting cocaine and heroin. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about how I almost lost my life to the struggle. So yeah we recover everyday from the demons that try to hold us down. Millions don't see this day and that's on everything I know and love!
This shit is 🔥🔥🔥
R.I.P Chester
it's good buddy
This is just a bad rap
+Lepi Najlepsi no it's not mate is good
It's shit yet you liked the video? Makes sense.
Kristina Joyal WTF is your problem? Josh didn't even do anything.
R.I.P Chester, this year marks 5 years since you have been gone
😭
@@dknt5117 💔🤘
Lyin’
Ik it’s cringe to quote something but like fr tho “I don’t wanna crack a smile I just wanna crack a bottle” actually hit me.
Actually its "I don't wanna crack a smile SO IM cracking a bottle"
phalosipher rap FL oh..? Lmfao it’s close enough
@@Christanbetz lol yeah
@@prodigy-topic8790 I.B.F. should change is profile be he's made too..
@@nutzo4sure30 haha
Rest In Peace Chester my dude thanks for some amazing years. Thank you merk for this fire and relatable tribute
Hearing about Chester really hurt. This is beautiful.
I gotta say man, I'm no rap expert or a super fan I'm just a 50 yr metal head, and this mix hit me hard, to say i relate wouldn't be enough, it's beyond relate to it and edging on identify to it, so much so when you spoke of dreaming of doing things you would never do I almost got sick it tore into me that deep, after 10 years filled with nightmares even my psychologist couldn't grasp or put a name to other then to call it complicated nightmare disorder I felt like you knew something they don't and I couldn't ever manage to explain or properly convey to anybody and never believed anybody else ever could because it had to just be me ... I caught this song brothrler at a time that this thing in my life was becoming to big for me to carry... and then suddenly I wasn't carrying It, after 10 years it was still there and still is but it doesn't tax me and ride on my back like it did, it doesn't weigh on me it just follows me.... and that really sucks, but I can do it, I haven't got a choice but to do it but I need you to hear this, its because of you that it's survivable right now and your remix that I listen to again to lighten everything I'm bearing the weight of when I get tired, it's a remix of a song that you gave such reality to that I didn't fall that day, because of it wasn't that day I don't believe I would have made the rest of the week.... you'll probably never see or read this, but I'm pretty sure your so g had a big part to do with saving me, it's not the first time I've been there and probably not the last .. but at that time in my fight and on that occasion you made a fan of man that only planned to be an obituary.
I share with others like me now, hoping to do the same for just one other person, someone that just needs not to be the only fucking one to be dealing with whatever it is there alone in, inherent always been a good person but I can atleast look at myself in the mirror and know who it is I'm looking at again and Know from the reflection that I can see and I can believe myself that I'm trying to be a good guy .. thank you for that, I've found alot of help in music these past few years thank to it all....CHEERS !
I find it hard for me to follow my dreams 'cause I get caught up in the drama 'till it's harder to breathe
I'm starin' right at my reflection and it's not even me
I got these voices in my head and I can't silence their screams
It's hauntin' my dreams I wonder if it's only myself
But as I take a look around I see nobody else
Can't talk about it to my homies 'cause my homies won't help
They act like they give a fuck but they don't know how it felt
So I just keep actin' like it's all okay, this bottled up pain got me feelin' hallow again
Everyday I wake up and it's just makin' me stressed
I take a deep breath, it's not me, maybe it's them
I don't wanna crack a smile, so I'm crackin' a bottle
A past full of sorrow, I know won't be happy tomorrow
That's fine, all that really matter to me is right now
So if you're lookin' for me I'm at home with the lights out
I'm still findin' ways for me to deal with the pain
It makes me wonder do they care if they won't see me again
Nobody wants to hear about it so I keep it contained
It takes a lot of late nights for me to see through the rain
Because..
[Hook]
I'm not myself, I'm not myself
I'm not myself, anymore..
I'm not myself, I'm not myself
I'm not myself, anymore..
Verse 2]
Back in school I was one of the cool kids but now I'm the quiet type and I'm ready to lose it
I'm sick of hopin' for better, man, it's only excuses
Wanna to start happening it I never would choose this
We all human and we all feel emotion but mine are stronger than others and so it's harder to cope with, it's causin' commotion
This weed got me coughing and choking, I'm on this boat all alone and I ain't got shit to row with
I'm lost in the moment, I'm trynna find a way to explain
I'm waiting so patient, these hangovers makin' me crazy
I'm havin' dreams of me doin' things that I'd never do
Am I in Hell cause this ain't Heaven can't I find out the truth?
This is part of my brain that I wish I could remove
If you were me you'd probably lie to you too
I over think then over drink when I ain't got shit to do
I'm sprawled out across the coach and I'm not gonna move
Because..
[Hook 2]
I'm not myself, I'm not myself
I'm not myself, anymore..
I'm not myself, I'm not myself
I'm not myself, anymore..
Anymore...
[Verse 3]
Everyday there's new pain inflicted, and when I'm drunk I'm convinced one day you'll get it
But you don't, so in the morning I deal with a disappointment
Another day, another search for enjoyment and it's annoying
But I made this bed for me to sleep and I see everybody else on the shore when I'm in the deep end
I can't breathe, it's a disease, it's a weakness
I'm starin' at this bottle full of pills like I need it.
Hook 3]
I'm not myself, I'm not myself
I'm not myself, anymore..
I'm not myself, I'm not myself
I'm not myself, anymore..
Anymore...
Anymore...
Anymore...
Anymore...
Anymore...
Anymore...
Anymore...
Dp D this should be on the top.
Made a lyric for this respectful tribute, please check it out!
great
Top comment this!
god bless u
Merkules and iamtherealak have become my favorite rappers! RIP Chester! Keep em coming Merk....
Bandat Bam id love a collab with those two
It would be great if they collaborated, they both sub each other, wonder if they ever talked privately. Anyways hope both make it and help to bring rap back! I can't stand this new mumble, nigga, nigga, mumble crap from all these so called artist these days.
Royce da 5 9 sucks i have heard him with ritz and yella wolf and he sucks ass
Merkules. Thank you for being real.
You inspired me to write something. I'm no rapper, but it's something I needed to write and share. I've been dealing with depression for quite some time, I've been in chronic physical pain for a long time and at times it has sucked me under. I've had many thoughts of taking my life....So I can relate to what you say in your lyrics. You're not alone in this and know that things will get better. keep your head up and the bottle down my friend. Have faith. Lots of love. Thank you.
Verse 1)
I lay awake in my bed it feels harder to think, my minds playing tricks on me I'm starting to think. I'm on the brink of disasta I gotta move fasta somethings gotta give. Now I know what a drug addict feels like when he relapses collapse's, falls to the ground, needle in his arm as he tosses around. They say the calm before the storm, but all I feel is the storm. Hurricane carter I feel trapped and alone. I keep thinkin these thoughts that I don't wanna think. Gaspin for air and my chest cavin in, I'm only 29 but it feels like I'm dying within. No good morning only night terrors my good mornings turned to nightmares. I grit my teeth and lay awake in bed with this white stare.
(Hook)
I don't feel the way I use to use to, I wish things could go back the way they use to, use to. I just want to feel me feel me, is that to much to ask.... FEEL ME?
Verse 2)
They say make the days count, but I'm just countin the days another search for enjoyment as time passes away. When you get a glimpse of it you want it to stay, some happiness, joy, bliss, but only the reminder of pain. This shits gettin uncomfortable day after day. No rest, I can't even close my eyes, because every time I do I feel like apart of me dies, crys, sighs, it feels like I'm slowly dying inside. Always a new pain, something to worry about, I try to speak these words and tears pour out of my mouth. I can't figure it out!! They say feel what you feel don't keep anything down, somthin your repressin stressin about, but all this confusion is causin depression. WHY CAN"T YOU FIGURE IT OUT!!? Until you get the lesson it's not goin to stop, but how do you find the bottom if you can't find the start!
(Hook)
Verse 3)
Pain grippin me I'm back at it again, like an addict, manic split personality man. What the fuck is wrong with me 5 fukin years delain with this shit, I've tried to quit. Many times I've tried to talk to my friends, but know one can really see the pain that I'm in. Guilt, burden, I've touched on them all, but thank god gods with me, so I don't have to cry it alone, die on my own. Moan.... Grone... 3 in the morning I keep tossin and turnin, I need someone to come take away this depression and worry. Pain is a funny thing, it doesn't leave you alone, but nothing funny about it, it stays right behind you and follows you home, you can't get away, darkness is all that you see.... So in the end I cover my face with these white faded sheets.....
(Hook)
End.
JD C Brilliant Barz the struggle is real many feel the pain I loved reading these lyrics as much as I love listening to the big man himself long live Merkules
i wrote a few things but i need a email
I also have Barz but not on this level email ???
JD C These are some powerful words, and very well written. Thank you for sharing!
Amazing. hang in there man. People would miss you.
My depression feels like I don't even exist, nobody listens, I'm one of the see-through people. Going outside is hard, getting up to go to work is hard, eating and brushing my teeth is hard, not reaching for the bottle every night is hard.
Chester would love this...amazing!!!
Exactly
Got that right
As a recovering addict with PTSD, this shit gave me new life. From the bottom of my heart Merk, thank you for giving us, the world, YOU.
I can relate on his music
I think this is such an awesome tribute.So sad about Chester.💔 Ignore the asshole comments. My friend met you this weekend and she was so thrilled... keep doing what you do!
As someone who's always suffered in silence mentally for the best part of twenty years, this really fucking talks to me.
this was needed thanks merk.
R.I.P CHESTER.
This totally blew me away and also destroyed my soul knowing Chester didn't see any other way out. RIP Chester, there will never be anyone else like you
fuck man...I've listened to this on repeat for the past hour.. its like you've put my thoughts into verse.. hell of a talent
Sam fovargue stg
I hear ya brother we need this guy he hits home
Sam fovargue the greatest thing about music is the emotion and interpretation. People think it sucks, but as i sit in my car bottle in one hand gun 8n the other kicked to the curb by a crazy heartless butch, drunk high and feeling out of options, i geel this is on fucking par. Anybody who doesnt feel the same, who the fuck cares. Everyone arguing about unimportant bullshit. Good music is good music, regardless of genre. If you dont feel it, listen to domesthi g you do do feel. If there is nothing, then i feel bad for you becausevafter 30 years of hell, it would seem you feel less than me, which i feel almost impossuble. Fuck you, fuck them, fuckit fuck me fuck your mom, butmost importantly, always remember, fuck itsall, but life goes on.
Every single lyric hits hard for depression sufferers, pretty much rounds off depression as a whole... big eye opener for others who don't quite understand, but this song litterally puts it into words... much love 🙏
love that remix RIP Chester
I've been searching my whole life for a song that I can relate to 100% this song came closer then any others. Intense impact.
Evan Smith check out bmike anxiety
Check out Alexa by DTG and Silent by DTG
Vinnie Paz- is happiness just a word
Wow.... That was one of the toughest remixes I've ever and I mean ever, heard. Holy shit you did the damned thing merkules. Much love and respect and props. Rest in peace chester. May your soul find peace and happiness. That spoke deeply to me. Also rest in peace david seating. Whom that reminded me of so much. Love you brother and miss you.
cant call it a remix when you're just rapping your own shit over the instrumentals of the original song.
Yo Dave, if Merk. wants to say or call it a remix. Than it's a frickin remix okay, so shut your yap. Shit isn't yours, you goof !!
Dude this is an amazing tribute to chester. He would be so proud of this!!
Killed it Merc, RIP Chester
saglike93 irony
Vlog City I thought the same thing
Jesus. No! Chester was a huge influence on my life, nothing but respect for him
saglike93 ame
David Belchior ?? Ame?
Bro for real. I've got no clue how I stumbled upon this. I've been looking for years to find something like this. My guitar and your voice could definitely do something epic! Nice tribute. The pain of his loss is felt brother!
"On this boat all alone and I ain't got shit to row with"
Man you are one hell of a great artist. My favorite part of the song by far because you snuck it in there with so much subtlety.
this remix is so fucking good, relatable and pure. Merkules is a true blessing for those who are struggling with things which make them depressed or suicidal.
Music like this helps me against drowning in my darkest moments. So thank you, Merk. And for anyone reading this feeling like me, keep your head up. Even though I dont know you, I dont want to lose you. Better days will show up is what we need to believe although I dont feel like that rn.
Merk I'm crying. you are truly amazing, you have a gift. Keep on keepin' on buddy! ❤
Dude you absolutely destroyed this holy shit.. mad props
Much respect brother. I lost my mom earlier this year after her long battle with cancer. I had depression before but nothing that was unmanageable (or so I thought) I was just a care free living 22 year old and I would deal with my problems later. After quitting my job, making money by other means from home, taking care of my mom, and watching my mom suffer for so long I feel I am lost and stuck in a place of mind that seems impossible to get out of. Also losing friends to manic attacks, O.D, and suicide in the same time frame. This cover and your anxiety rap especially hit home with me as I'm sure many other individuals. You have a gift. I like rap but have strayed away from what everyone's talking about in their music, because of what I just watched in your Panda remix. I've been searching for new music, stumbled upon easy mac, which I saw you pop up and have been bumping posting, and sharing your songs. Just trying to send the same message back to you that your music sent to me...you aren't alone. You lay your life out on the table, just showing the same back to you. Keep it up brother, much love, subscribed and can't wait to hear the future songs.
Johnny Water keep strong bro . I lost my mom to leukemia when I was 16 then my dad ditched me for another girl and moved to Ohio . Slept in the streets , park benches , drinking bottles of vodka , smokin a shit ton of meth . I still drink a little bit , but been clean off meth for 4 years , I got a job making about 25-30 grand a year enough to support myself in California , barely scraping by but hey it’s something . Just keep your head up . We’re all in this together
Johnny Water I actually attempted suicide and was grateful when I woke up in he hospital . I swallowed a handful of acetaminophen . My friend showed up at my apartment , he had a key for it and he saw me on the ground and called 911 . I’m grateful I’m still alive
Johnny Water and sorry about to hear about you mom
Keep strong bud just keep going take everyday as it comes one step at a time, god bless you and your mother 🙏
Johnny Water god bless you its hard. Been there cant say it get easier but dont think its a weakness to share your thoughts and feelings . it helps .
This song helped me through the worst time of my life. It still rings true to this day thank you for putting this together as fast and properly as you did it means the world to me and I share it with everyone. Putting the suicide hotline number on the end means the most to me and you have probably saved lives. I kicked fetty to this song thank you.!!
Respect💯
I personally think this is one of the best songs ive ever heard. I come back to listen to it All the time
it doesnt get any more real than this
PMD
😗💨 *Cheers* 😗💨
Still rocking this in my depressed stage. Helps me everyday.
“There’s this part of my brain I wish I could remove” Resonating beyond compare
I don't wanna crack a smile
so i'm cracking a bottle
A pass for the sorrow,
I know I won't be happy tomorrow
😞
Too deep
" A past full of Sorrow " And I swear bro, Im sure now you know the real lyrics its even deeper..
amen brother, fukin amen!
when you read the lyrics same time it's being said 😊
Emotions are stronger then yours and harder to cope with
Evz evz hits nervs
How did i just find this? Chester was and still is one my my Heroes and i was so depressed when he passed. You killed this beat man, i think Chester would have been so happy to hear this.
When I first found your music I didn't understand it but 9 year in & I'm starting to understand the lyrics more because I've came to realise that my mental health illnesses aren't leaving my mind or body soon & at first that was the hardest pill for me to swallow it cut deep so deep I ended binge drinking to cope with my illness but when I'm in my bedroom doing what I love doing which is helping others deal with their demons through making music about depression suicide & this fucking mental health disorder your a proper inspiration to me & the music I make & it gives me goosebumps coz everything you rap about is literally what most of the world feels or going through keep up the good work
Amazing, man! I've suffered from anxiety myself too, and it is such a weird state of mind to be in. You know something is wrong, you know what you think is stupid and shouldn't be that way, but still you can't control it. Stay strong man, you'll get through it!
This song literally saved my life. 4/25/18, I had a loaded gun in my hand ready to kill myself because i lost everything. I heard this remix on facebook and your lyrics hit me so hard i couldnt even bring the gun to my head. But as of 3/20/19, I now have a great job, great friends that actually have my back, and im actually happy with my life. I cant thank you enough merk for writing this remix. You can know now that you did save at least one life with your music.
Hilarious
Stfu punk ass
Glad you're still here. Hope it's getting better.
well done takes alot to get out of dark places, MUSIC IS A HEALER especially when you have a guy that can put lyrics together like this guy
Youkandme Hikers You’re not me, kid, but I’m sure that’s advice you live by. No disrespect, you’re a pussy.
Better than 90% of the shit coming out today 🔥
Not as good as Joyner Lucas or NF but he is a lyrical genius
And THIS is my favorite remix you have done. I would do anything to hear you do this live. What an amazing job honering this song and Chester, he would love this man. You should be proud, deeply. 🙏
I like how you created your own version to the song rather than remixing it into some dumb ass EDM style beat to pay tribute. Love it!
Chester would definitely be honored that you, Merkules, would do what your good at to one of the greatest tracks from back in the day! With this track comes alot of memories, good, bad & definitely the younger days, which is priceless! Thank you..
R. I. P CHESTER ✌
Two years ago today my father died this popped up on my recommended today and I'm glad it did ... Thanks merk for helping me again
This remix of “In the end” was so real. I’ve been there, it took so much to get out of that darkness.
This needs to go super viral!!! This shit 🔥🔥🔥
This day broke my heart what was left of it Chester stopped my wrists from bleeding thank you for this u saved my life remember waking up to this song and realizing what happened half way threw ure song I might have lookin myself if it wasnt 4 you thank you ....
One word #Awesome
But hashtag awesome is two words
no its not.
its a symbol if you just want to go deep
Co to posloucháš Pavle ? 😂
Linkin Park moje dětství a merkules je totální samopal na slova :)
R.I.P.
*That was an amazing mix and hit hard.* The loss of Chester is one that hits harder than any other artist for me personally. It still doesn't feel real... His last tracks hit so much deeper now.
I feel you, I miss Chester everyday, I keep thinking I'm gonna hear a new song, but no......
It still breaks my ❤
@@jeannerandall9670 Same here...
Only found out this masterpiece now, damn..
Me too wow just wow
Better late than never
Dude that was sick that was the best damn freestyle I've ever heard in my life. rip Chester Bennington gone but not forgotten
This was the first song I ever heard from Merk, and I've been hooked ever since.. The man spits truth and flames