i always think that bare minimum is different from one person to another like you set your own bare minimum. bcs some ppl might think that peeling orange for the partner is not bare minimum like you can still get touched by the action but some might say that it is a bare minimum. we cant invalidate the feeling of being touched by smallest thing. like ppl say, small things matter.
Testing your partner through a TikTok trend and then coming to a conclusion about your relationship when they don't do what they're 'supposed to' makes YOU the one who's lacking. So if my girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife who's nice, kind, loyal, and respectful towards me doesn't 'critically think' when I ask for something simple or drop a hint, they're automatically a 'red-flag' and 'not the one for me' just because Anna, someone who doesn't know me, my partner, or about my relationship, from TikTok said so?
Azura's stance is conflicting. Saying this and that is bare minimum. "if its a simple thing and it cost you nothing, but your partner wants it. It should be quite easy for you to do it or you should want to do it no?" Afterwards saying that we shouldn't have expectation of our partner. You can see Germaine and Hazelle on the same page on the orange part and appreciating the critical thinking of your partner for the glass of water, but Azura said "No, thats bare minimum. Have they been so disappointing that when they think critically, we think its incredible." So if your friend take a glass of water for you and your partner does the same, means your partner is not special. Of course i know you say thank you and appreciate your partner's action, but "thank you" is so easy for you to say. Probably, everyone have different level of minimum. I'm on the same page with Germaine and Hazelle on this. NOTE: i'm not here to spread hate. I hope there is no misunderstanding. I'm just here joining this podcast discussion :)
My ex and I were in a relationship for 2 years. Towards the end of our relationship, he started doing the “below minimum” too. (we were doing ldr) For example: not saying goodnight before bed, saying that I should’ve known that he had slept instead of waiting for his replies, replying my messages with a 😂 emoji when I told him about my day, and many more… like hazy said: there wasn’t any reason to break up, but should I stay?
Couldnt finish this video. I think the vibe is just bad. Just shows this gen is fried. It is actually quite the opposite, you celebrate bare minimums too! You make your partner feel appreciated. Once you start thinking "i shouldnt reward bare minimum" you start to be entitled. This is so low level. I just cant continue listening. You gals should level up and get some therapy. Even in any relationships you praise to get more of a good behavior. You tell your kid "i am so proud of you for .... (something simple)" and the kid will wanna do more to stay in your good books so to speak. And it is in line with the whole "be grateful" vibe to be positive. Being positive is not about having things you want happen to you. You cannot control things. But you control how you respond to things. Being grateful helps with your outlook in life and you emit positive vibes and you attract more wonderful ppl. By having an entitled spirit, you ARE the KAREN.
the orange peel theory i understood is asking your partner to get you an orange - if it comes peeled, he did extra but if it comes unpeeled then it's the bare minimum! :)
Agree that bare minimum differs for different people and it is not about big or small gestures. It is about whether the action has any ‘cost’ to your partner. Bare minimum gestures can be very sweet, but they are done because it is ‘convenient’ or ‘easy’ for your partner. Eg if your partner picks you up from work because his office is nearby to yours, but doesn’t do so if he happens to be at a work event which is further away and closer to his home. It is definitely sweet to take time and effort to send you home but your partner doesn’t go out of his way for you. Then this could be a bare minimum gesture for this person. Eg if your partner doesn’t like seafood but always accompanies you to seafood restaurants cos u like it. Though it is just a meal but I think your partner considers your interest above his and hence this is not a bare minimum gesture for this person. Just some examples but actually I think as long as your partner does something that is aligned with your love language you would find it sweet even if it is their bare minimum. So the question is does it matter if your partner only does his personal bare minimum for you if he makes you happy anyway? So about the cup of coffee while taking a zoom call, I think it is sweet and I appreciate him for it but it is still a bare minimum gesture for my partner if it dosent inconvenient him in any way and easy for him to make that coffee. Unless, he dosent drink coffee but keeps coffee at home and brew coffee for me, then that is definitely above and beyond in my opinion 😊
If u r in a "bare minimum" relationship (its subjective isnt it?) but the Love is still there? Then do u still leave or be content to stay on? After all when couples grow old together, bare minimum probably becomes normal day to day living for most old couples. What do u think?
3:39 “Love that loves you when it’s inconvenient and not only when its convenient.”
i always think that bare minimum is different from one person to another like you set your own bare minimum. bcs some ppl might think that peeling orange for the partner is not bare minimum like you can still get touched by the action but some might say that it is a bare minimum. we cant invalidate the feeling of being touched by smallest thing. like ppl say, small things matter.
Testing your partner through a TikTok trend and then coming to a conclusion about your relationship when they don't do what they're 'supposed to' makes YOU the one who's lacking.
So if my girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife who's nice, kind, loyal, and respectful towards me doesn't 'critically think' when I ask for something simple or drop a hint, they're automatically a 'red-flag' and 'not the one for me' just because Anna, someone who doesn't know me, my partner, or about my relationship, from TikTok said so?
This is definitely a mental maturity thing 😂
Azura's stance is conflicting. Saying this and that is bare minimum. "if its a simple thing and it cost you nothing, but your partner wants it. It should be quite easy for you to do it or you should want to do it no?" Afterwards saying that we shouldn't have expectation of our partner.
You can see Germaine and Hazelle on the same page on the orange part and appreciating the critical thinking of your partner for the glass of water, but Azura said "No, thats bare minimum. Have they been so disappointing that when they think critically, we think its incredible." So if your friend take a glass of water for you and your partner does the same, means your partner is not special. Of course i know you say thank you and appreciate your partner's action, but "thank you" is so easy for you to say. Probably, everyone have different level of minimum.
I'm on the same page with Germaine and Hazelle on this. NOTE: i'm not here to spread hate. I hope there is no misunderstanding. I'm just here joining this podcast discussion :)
My ex and I were in a relationship for 2 years. Towards the end of our relationship, he started doing the “below minimum” too. (we were doing ldr) For example: not saying goodnight before bed, saying that I should’ve known that he had slept instead of waiting for his replies, replying my messages with a 😂 emoji when I told him about my day, and many more… like hazy said: there wasn’t any reason to break up, but should I stay?
Couldnt finish this video.
I think the vibe is just bad.
Just shows this gen is fried.
It is actually quite the opposite, you celebrate bare minimums too!
You make your partner feel appreciated.
Once you start thinking "i shouldnt reward bare minimum" you start to be entitled.
This is so low level. I just cant continue listening.
You gals should level up and get some therapy.
Even in any relationships you praise to get more of a good behavior.
You tell your kid "i am so proud of you for .... (something simple)" and the kid will wanna do more to stay in your good books so to speak.
And it is in line with the whole "be grateful" vibe to be positive.
Being positive is not about having things you want happen to you.
You cannot control things. But you control how you respond to things.
Being grateful helps with your outlook in life and you emit positive vibes and you attract more wonderful ppl.
By having an entitled spirit, you ARE the KAREN.
the orange peel theory i understood is asking your partner to get you an orange - if it comes peeled, he did extra but if it comes unpeeled then it's the bare minimum! :)
Agree that bare minimum differs for different people and it is not about big or small gestures. It is about whether the action has any ‘cost’ to your partner. Bare minimum gestures can be very sweet, but they are done because it is ‘convenient’ or ‘easy’ for your partner. Eg if your partner picks you up from work because his office is nearby to yours, but doesn’t do so if he happens to be at a work event which is further away and closer to his home. It is definitely sweet to take time and effort to send you home but your partner doesn’t go out of his way for you. Then this could be a bare minimum gesture for this person. Eg if your partner doesn’t like seafood but always accompanies you to seafood restaurants cos u like it. Though it is just a meal but I think your partner considers your interest above his and hence this is not a bare minimum gesture for this person. Just some examples but actually I think as long as your partner does something that is aligned with your love language you would find it sweet even if it is their bare minimum. So the question is does it matter if your partner only does his personal bare minimum for you if he makes you happy anyway?
So about the cup of coffee while taking a zoom call, I think it is sweet and I appreciate him for it but it is still a bare minimum gesture for my partner if it dosent inconvenient him in any way and easy for him to make that coffee. Unless, he dosent drink coffee but keeps coffee at home and brew coffee for me, then that is definitely above and beyond in my opinion 😊
LOVE THE SET!
16:15 letting your bf have his "bro time" is considered fucking sweet?? that's where I stopped listening lol
love the new set!
Perhaps in some cases, your partner does the bare minimum because you are doing the same.
The entire conversation varies from wholesome/yes it's bare minimum to omg we need Andrew Tate here
If u r in a "bare minimum" relationship (its subjective isnt it?) but the Love is still there?
Then do u still leave or be content to stay on? After all when couples grow old together, bare minimum probably becomes normal day to day living for most old couples.
What do u think?
Way too many ads inbetween
my young 4 year old daughter looks like Germaine. SImilar facial structure, eyes nose etc hehehe
No Azura, you don't say below minimum, you say barely minimum. Haha