I am one of the most goal-oriented people you will ever meet. I have goals for everything. Yet, I love this message, because at the end of the day, what I realize is that I'm actually very good at creating systems (which are really just small steps) that move me toward the things/behaviors/etc. that I want. I never feel like a failure if I've made progress toward an end goal, such as finishing a book by a certain date or losing a certain amount of weight. I'm also constantly in the process of reassessing my goals. For example, if I'm not doing the things I've said I'm going to do (say, exercise 30 minutes a day or whatever), then I have to ask myself if I really want the benefits of exercise and where that falls in my overall priority. Maybe the timing's not right because I've got other things going on that are more important to me. So I need to be willing to flex and shift what and how much I expect of myself. Or create a better system. So thanks for this . . . food for thought.
Wow - your message needs to reach others Amber! So happy to hear of your success on this. Now need to teach the rest of us. :) Thanks so much for sharing!
This makes good sense to me. I always thought that a lot of the gurus of life coaching were often pitching their products rather than actually helping people. This confirms that stance. Thanks Matt. Great explanation as always.
I think it may be like most products: helps some people (whether 1% or 50%) and you hear the success stories, but then it doesn't "work" for you. Rule #1 of psychology: People are different. So my hope is for people not to get frustrated that these goal-oriented solutions don't work and think something wrong with them. There are MANY ways to get motivated, just need to find the way that works for you and "systems" is a wider approach. Thanks for the kudos and comment David!
What’s interesting to me is that, when it comes to to thinking (cognition) there are many differences. But biologically, such as a dual brain setup (head brain - gut brain) we are identical. The challenge is to educate people to see that there’s a huge advantage to having a brain (in the gut) that is not designed to think things but is great at feeling things. That’s when an internalized motivating force can be applied and striving is easier.
Love Scott Adams and his perspective on systems. Works a lot better for me than goals. I'm currently reading Finish by Jon Acuff and it has a lot of great advice to get you from the start to the finish line. Check it out.
Isnt this just semantics? How is drinking a cup of coffee alone every day not a goal? Not saying youre missing it. But i read the entire book and still cant day theres a clear difference. It seems to me like a "system" is simply a daily practical application towards achieving a goal. So in other words, i agree that theres bad goal application and good. Bad being "ill starbe myself and eat food i hate" to lose 20 lbs vs "ill eat good healthy food and exercise". Both are actions towards goals. One good and one bad
I am one of the most goal-oriented people you will ever meet. I have goals for everything. Yet, I love this message, because at the end of the day, what I realize is that I'm actually very good at creating systems (which are really just small steps) that move me toward the things/behaviors/etc. that I want. I never feel like a failure if I've made progress toward an end goal, such as finishing a book by a certain date or losing a certain amount of weight. I'm also constantly in the process of reassessing my goals. For example, if I'm not doing the things I've said I'm going to do (say, exercise 30 minutes a day or whatever), then I have to ask myself if I really want the benefits of exercise and where that falls in my overall priority. Maybe the timing's not right because I've got other things going on that are more important to me. So I need to be willing to flex and shift what and how much I expect of myself. Or create a better system. So thanks for this . . . food for thought.
Wow - your message needs to reach others Amber! So happy to hear of your success on this. Now need to teach the rest of us. :) Thanks so much for sharing!
This makes good sense to me. I always thought that a lot of the gurus of life coaching were often pitching their products rather than actually helping people. This confirms that stance. Thanks Matt. Great explanation as always.
I think it may be like most products: helps some people (whether 1% or 50%) and you hear the success stories, but then it doesn't "work" for you. Rule #1 of psychology: People are different. So my hope is for people not to get frustrated that these goal-oriented solutions don't work and think something wrong with them. There are MANY ways to get motivated, just need to find the way that works for you and "systems" is a wider approach. Thanks for the kudos and comment David!
What’s interesting to me is that, when it comes to to thinking (cognition) there are many differences. But biologically, such as a dual brain setup (head brain - gut brain) we are identical. The challenge is to educate people to see that there’s a huge advantage to having a brain (in the gut) that is not designed to think things but is great at feeling things. That’s when an internalized motivating force can be applied and striving is easier.
Useful thoughts
Love Scott Adams and his perspective on systems. Works a lot better for me than goals. I'm currently reading Finish by Jon Acuff and it has a lot of great advice to get you from the start to the finish line. Check it out.
Thanks for the comment and the recommendation - I've heard folks mention Acuff many times but haven't yet checked out his books. But will!
Isnt this just semantics? How is drinking a cup of coffee alone every day not a goal?
Not saying youre missing it. But i read the entire book and still cant day theres a clear difference. It seems to me like a "system" is simply a daily practical application towards achieving a goal.
So in other words, i agree that theres bad goal application and good. Bad being "ill starbe myself and eat food i hate" to lose 20 lbs vs "ill eat good healthy food and exercise". Both are actions towards goals. One good and one bad