I’m 58 and I still like answers quicker. My time is valuable and I like to be answered sooner than later. A week to respond shows me that the person doesn’t have time for a friendship with me.
I really enjoyed this! I'm older and work from home, so it is difficult to meet new friends. Great tips on putting ourselves out there in the community. ♥️
Hello Shelly! I just found you tonight because I am turning 53 this month and wanted to learn how to get rid of my extra weight. I will be trying these moves, thank you. I got to this reel and love this conversation. I truly feel that “looking” isn’t the answer. I truly believe that we can manifest by imagining who or what kind of person we would like to meet and become good friends with and it would inspire us to be that person or a friend to that person or someone who spends time in that environment that that person we want as a friend would spend time in. This is law of attraction that brings us what we are looking for but we shouldn’t be looking for it. We should be feeling it and feeling gratitude for feeling that goal. Your answer of not “looking” was a great answer. We attract what we want!
Your video couldn't have come at a better time! In the last 6 months, my closest friends have moved away to be nearer to their grand-kids & my husband got a new job 7 hours away from where we've been living for the last 28 years. We're moving in 3 weeks & I've been dreading it... going from a small town to a big city and making new friends. Thanks SO much for all the great tips & helping to ease my fears. Count me in for the monthly get-together too. Sounds Awesome! You Rock!!💖
I really needed this. I watched to the end and will re watch it to make sure I really get it. I had a best friend that I grew up with and did everything with she was 5 years older than me but our friendship started when l was born. My mother adopted me as a single parent in the 50’s yes I am 65, anyway our next door neighbor became my babysitter and this is where my best friend lived, her mother babysat me until I was old enough to be at home after school by myself, but even then I would drop my school books at home maybe watch a show on tv or maybe not and go to my best friends house even if she was not there and watch tv and spend time with her mom whom I love so much. Well my best friend passed away in 2010 from cancer and my world just turned upside down forever. In the past 5 years or so I’ve really wanted/needed someone I could share my ups and downs with, someone to just be there with me through these very tough times and very good times. I know there’s will never be anyone like my best friend again and there will never be anyone that will mean what she means to me but I really really long for that person that will be my friend with no judgement and who loves to be silly but can be serious when needed. The friends I’ve made in the past 5 years are gone for one reason or another and when I heard you say those words “friends are in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime, that really helped me make sense of the loss of those friends I’ve made but are now gone. Thank you for theses wonderful words of wisdom. ❤
❤ Bless you Doris! Stay encouraged and know each of us has a purpose… may you see the beauty in the next chapter of your journey. Moving forward while treasuring the memories of your friends. ❤
This is one to refer to over and over. Packed with such important and realistic tips. So much great nuggets of wisdom. Heather, thank you so much. Wonderful presentation, Shellea❤
Great talk and good advice. I never realized that I have lots of micro friends which is perfect for me at 57. I have always talked to strangers. There are so many interesting people out there. Although, I would never ask anyone when was the last time you were happy? That could be like opening Pandora's box. What if they said, "2004"? Yikes....🤔 I am in! Keep us posted on how and when, yay!
I find in social situations that I am better one on one, in large groups I tend to fade into the background and disappear. I try to join in the conversations but no one engages with me so I feel as if I am not interesting enough and give up. I am 61 and work from home so putting myself out there scares me a lot. I love your attitude Shelly and when I work out to your videos I feel so much better, so thank you for all that you do!!💗
I agree with you so much. I tried to do ladies book club in my apartment community, even bought each person the book to read ...no one was interested. Then tried dog ice cream party since many have pet dogs...ignored again.
@@janespitfire9884deatnsister, please pray to find a True Bible believing born again Christian church and you will find the love and friendship with JESUS and be loved on by HIS people🙏🏼
Oh I can relate to your experience !! I am interested in friends who can help me grow and to learn more about me. Also that they feel the same way. I have always been a loner , not many friends in my life time. People who have come into my life I helped them in some way. Right now I have no contact with anyone. I stay at home and then go out and do normal errands. But when I am in a certain grocery store, the people their love talking with me, since I inspire them and just have fun conversations.. I am looking forward to meaningful friendships and their a thousands plus of starseeds I have not even met yet.. ❤ 🙏
Loved listening and watching this! I am a card maker and so I’ve given cards to random people in shopping parking lots! This one woman just said to me what a beautiful day it is as we were getting into our cars and that opened the door for me to offer her a package of my cards! She was so surprised and happy! I keep them in my vehicle! P.S. I am on the shy side too) 😅😊
I took the time to relax and watch the whole conversation very helpful tips I actually met new people going out by myself to a park or a bar i wouldn't call them friends but just the fact to be able to meet different people would make my day better, and thumbs up schellea for trying your best to help us women 😊
Thank you so much for this interview. It really gave me inspiration to follow some of your tips. I never heard of speed friending before but it sounds like a fun idea. As my family is getting smaller and smaller (Due to age and sadly passings), it definitely helps having and making new friends. I am of course the other side of the planet based in the UK but I certainly enjoy all your great videos and tips. I also enjoy your exercise videos, you always makes it fun. You are a true friend to so many I see that more than 500 women has liked your video, so well done! xxx
These are wonderful ideas that I needed! I've had major life changes - retirement and moving back home to care for my elderly mother. I'm grateful that I can do it but my whole social network fell apart. These ideas may help me be more intentional about making connections with people. I would be interested in the online idea you mentioned at the end. I'm not able to be out and about very much so online would be great.
Thanks for taking the time to share this with me Wendy! You can start by joining the Fabulous50s Community Group here... facebook.com/groups/290247628386380/ 🤗💕
Schellea, to follow in the spirit of your video and offer a potential positive way forward for those who have had a negative reaction and want to isolate themselves further, I wanted to share that since watching your video, and after seeing the Blue Zone doc recently and thinking yet again about how I want to connect with the community, I've applied to be a volunteer with AgeUK. Specifically, to be a friendly ear on the phone for the elderly who are lonely and need someone to talk to. I live in a different country from my family and best friend and oldest friends, and while I do have very good friends here (that I'd like to see more often), and I've made some nice connections at my tennis club, I felt that I needed to do something meaningful. Thank you for talking about how important connections and having purpose in life is for longevity - which benefits all involved and gets paid forward. ❤
Thanks beautiful ladies. Very inspiring! One word of caution is to only talk to cashiers very briefly or wait until they are not busy. People in the Walmart line will kill you if you hold them up 😂. This video is a sign to me to pick myself up, dust myself off and try again!🤗🤗
I usually let people know that I do not respond right away to messages, everyone who I communicate with via e-mails, text messages know this , I make it a point to let them know ahead of time and most are OK with this
I know my hobbies and interests and attend things related to them. I know what kind of friend I want to be (and would want). I've known this for decades, but it's not up to me; it's up to others to take the offering and even when they do, they rarely follow up.
Well I got to 6:37 of this very infuriating video. My gosh who needs all that stress and wasted time. Only to find out, "Oops not that one".😂 I think my time is better spent on the things I do . When people "did" come to my place as they left I say. " I am who I am. Bubbly, caring and honest. If you don't like it, there's the door ". They haven't been back. YAY😅. OH one lot did wNt us to" Swing". No thanks 😅. Hard enough keeping up with one, let alone two or more😅.
Mmm all sounds good in theory, I'm at a stage where I want good long term friends not micro/acquaintances, friends to shop, lunch, holiday etc with and friends that live close by. I spend 98% of my time on my own and it certainly wears on your mental state. I think having friends gives you purpose and grows your mind and energy and creates interest in your life. I also think alot of what she was saying can depend on the community you live in. 🤷♀️🩷
I don't like to desperately force or contrive any situation. Whatever is meant to enter your path will find you and mirror back to you whatever you possess within you. Work on yourself and do fun things you enjoy. Then if you meet someone your vibration will be high and you will attract that which you have within your being. If you worry and force things then the results won't be as great.
I have to disagree with this. 2 of the best friends I have had now for over 25 years are because I was so desperate for intimate friendships that I went out of the blue I asked if they would like to go out for coffee sometime. That I was really desperate to make some friends. To this day it was one of the best decisions I ever made.
I became a widow in my early 40s and have found it difficult to reconnect with friends. This was fabulous and I really enjoyed the tips to push myself. I would love to watch more sessions. I love the challenge idea because I'm an introvert and find it difficult yo approach anyone.
What a wonderful interview! I am fortunate to have a volunteer job at our local library where I can meet new people of all ages and backgrounds, and we have repeat visitors who have become my library friends and whom I don’t see outside of work. It’s nice to hear their stories and get book recommendations from them. It makes the job more interesting and enjoyable! Thank you Schellea and Heather!
An absolute pleasure! Thank you for sharing about your library friends! I am beside my(shelf) :P in joy to hear they are giving you all the great book recommendations! - Heather
I disagree! So called friendships often cause so much drama in your life. I’ve reached a certain age in my life where I’ve reevaluated my life getting rid of the toxic things in my life and one reason why I choose not to have friends. Extroverts wouldn’t be able to do this because it’s the energy they get from people (energy vampires) that keep them going.
At a bridal shower for my best friend's daughter, I learned that many of my friend's other friends also consider her to be their "best friend". We all need to find great friends like her: kind, there for you, mature / non-dramatic, and interesting to talk with.
hi ladies having returned home after many years, I found friends moved also. One day I pulled up my 65 yo nerve and walked across the street to meet the lady who lived there. Gave her my number. NOTHING. I have handed out so many products with my number on it and no return. Losing my interest. The covid thing also is a barrier if unvaxed meet up does not want you
I’ve started doing this much more over the last several years and it is wonderful how good it makes not only you, but the other person feel! I love to help make someone’s day better with a small compliment or something positive that you are thinking about them! Just a few nice words can make a big difference! I can be somewhat extrovert at times depending on who I’m around, but for the most part I’m introverted socially.
I love this video on making new friends--I liked the discussion about giving a complement. Also remember if you are given a compliment--Graciously accept it!! We might not feel comfortable getting a compliment, but don't disrespect the giver by dismissing the compliment--just say, "Thanks"
I thought I had a recent female friend because I'm 66 but seems like things that I would say she would disagree on but I never did that to her so maybe she just doesn't like me but I thought maybe that I was a friend to her because I had tried to be at least I thought I was but she's not speaking to me I was thinking that I had met a nice lady friend because she always talking like she was on the level but maybe she wasn't after all. Thankyou for sharing this video. ❤
I really enjoyed this, thank you!! I'm looking forward to your idea called "Fabulous Friends". This was such a great video filled with lots of tips, for anyone!!
I love this video and I love the idea of Fabulous Friends. You talk about the things that people don't talk about and the things we need to talk about. We so often think we are the only ones who feel this way, only to find through these conversations that what we feel is felt by many. I am the same age as you Schellea, no where near the same fitness, but you inspire me every day to do better ❤
Take a class. I’ve made lots of friends in my water aerobics class and a pottery class. Volunteer. Offer to teach something. Take your dog for a walk in the park. Take your grandchildren to the park and take extra toys to share. Go to the park just to walk. Ask for advice. Start a conversation. Set an intention to enjoy your day.
It's easier to do all of those things if you don't lack confidence or suffer from low self-esteem. It's much more difficult for those of us who do to take those first steps.
@@catherinewilkes1755 the good news is that self esteem can be learned. Confidence can be grown by taking small steps. If you lack the courage, maybe talking with a therapist, or picking up a self-help book that speaks to you might be useful.
I’m doing something new, volunteering at our community’s film festival. Volunteering doesn’t have to only be about helping those who are down, it can also be about community and fun. My volunteer job will require me to talk with people, help them find their seats and cinema locations. This is a wonderful educational discussion. Thank you!
Completely agree with you! Volunteering is such an incredible way to be a part of the community and really really enjoy yourself! I remember once volunteering at a PAINT festival and it was marvelous. - Heather
Similar interests doesn't mean those people who do the same with me will be the kind of friends i would like to have, i will call them my acquaintances only not FRIENDS because to me when I call someone a "friend" that person also passed my secret evaluation of my so called FRIENDS. I like this phrase about having a Friend for A reason, a Season, a Lifetime Friend. Very interesting topic.
I loved this. It's just what I needed to hear. I will watch again as there are so many fab messages in there. I'd love to be part of the Fabulous Friends. Thank you Schellea ❤
Some simple acts of kindness are much appreciated and require little of you. While walking in my neighborhood I saw a woman walking across my path to her car. She was wearing a sequined dress for a party. I told her she looked nice. I said it spontaneously because she did. She was about 40 and bit chubby. Anyone who has extra pounds can appreciate that buying a dress can make you feel insecure. Her husband just missed my comment. It could have been a ”2 for”. Men like feeling that they have a pretty girl beside them. I also have opened the door for working men that have their hands full. They appreciate it. Thank you for taking this issue on. Maybe there would be less violence in the world if we all tried to be kind and friendly most of the time.
When I was in my 20's, I belonged to the Jr. Jaycees. I don't even know if they have that anymore. When you go to your first conference, they have a contest with all the first timers, to introduce yourself to as many people as you can. They sign your book. I was the winner, competitive by nature. I'm also an introvert, very happy to be alone and mostly shy. But, I do not have to be. I decide to be. I think people decide to be this way or that and not necessarily a lifetime commitment. Like being a leader or a follower. Well, most people are both. We lead when we need to, and follow when we can.
Thank you for this great talk! Loved the vibe and the message! Yes, we are social animals and need other people! And yes, I was in my pj's with my hair not done! 😂
Playing with the semantics of the true meaning of the word "friend" presents a superficial solution. Interactions with acquaintances and passerbys are a delight but these never replace a true friend.
My husband became disabled and over the years friends dropped away and we just had each other. 3 years ago he died and I have family but no friends, it’s pretty sad.
Sorry, I disagree that it is harder to make friends as an introvert. I am social with strangers as well as my friends, but after a few hours, I need to be alone and “recharge”. I do think that it is harder to find new friends as I get older. Some people have so many issues and the political climate also causes people to be disagreeable.
Ways I've found a friend a really good friend for me was I bought a horse from one Another one I have is she offered me a new bottle of laundry soap just because she had two I didn't need any but it sparked a conversation that made a beautiful friendship we actually prayed at the laundry mat together She's a wonderful person she always tells lady's how wonderful they look women that don't have maybe a spouse or a lot of friends it's really helps encourage them everyone needs encouraging
So it seems like the key is knowing what activities you want to do with this friend. I would never approach someone and asked it could sit by them. Odds are if someone did that with me i would be put off by them. I am resistant to change mostly due to fear.
I have no friends to hang out with. I'm 55 year's old I just have my husband ( he likes it that way). I do have 5 children as well. I would like to have a friend but I've noticed I feel weird and uncomfortable if I do happen to get to go somewhere with a cousin or something. I think I have social anxiety not sure. I usually am shy at first meeting someone but open up and relax after a bit of hanging out with someone. I'm nervous to step out of what my normal is. I'm the old person you spoke of. Lol. I'd like to be in an online community where women chat.
I believe it's important to have friends who make you feel happy, energetic and are fun. To talk about hobbies,family activities, share knowledge and things they've experienced in life to share with others. Not to talk about drama.
Shelly, thank you for having this video and inviting Heather. I am an entrepreneur (I have a lot of opportunities to meet new people in my job, but, still struggle with finding the "right" people that I want to be friends with. I love meeting new people , however, I am more shy and also do better one on one. But, I can be more extroverted when I want to be. I would love to connect better with other women my age. I think this is something we can all learn new tips on how to do this. I would love to be part of the monthly talks. I also just pre-ordered your course (making friends over 50). I'm very excited about the course and your possible monthly talks here.. thank you both. xo
Absolutely can not wait to unveil Fabulous Friends soon Marissa. :) I too am an entrepreneur, I understand. When there is so much opportunity to meet people, it definitely can be difficult to find the 'right' people - your people! Please do let us know what else you would like us to cover in future talks! - Heather
I do that a lot! -no less a value, it makes me feel terrific. When commenting about customer service, phrase I use most often is some combo of "Professional & courteous. Thank that representatove for me."
This was great! I wasn’t too sure about approaching someone in the mall lol - and I thought if I was the person approached, I’d probably be a bit freaked out, like someone was invading my personal space, but the idea of stating it was a challenge made it a lot easier to contemplate on both sides. And I love the idea of “micro-friendships”. I have a history of having way too many expectations from friends and suffering big disappointment. Really good tips and ideas! I usually don’t watch videos longer than 10-15 min but I stuck with this one 😂
Hi. I would like to take part in the online friendship group. How do I join? Thank you both for doing this video. You two are so friendly and caring. I am a subscriber. I watch your videos several times a week. ❤
I loved this! I have been praying for friends my age with common interests. These are step I can take. I have already, for many years, been making 5-minute friends as I call them. In store lines , on walks everywhere. They just never bloom into more. I hope you go ahead with Fabulous Friends at a time those of us in The United States can attend. Maybe we will even find out we live near some of the other ladies and can meet up.
5 minute friends is such a great name for it! We will definitely let you know when Fabulous Friends is up and running! Thank you for sharing Julie :) Heather
So many gems in this- thank you! Sometimes you need to take a deep breath, put yourself out there and say hi to the world. And it usually says hi back! 😊
Exactly. My husband and I eat well, get out and about and meet people. Interaction in a shop is more to us as sometimes that person just wants to unload something that they probably can't do with someone they are close to. I just don't have time for sitting around all the time drinking coffee, wasting time and money. Talking about stuff that is so depressing and I can't change. Cost of living, kids of today, vaping. Yuck 🤢. Just writing those words is depressing enough 😅.
This was very interesting to listen to. I listened while I was on my rebounder 🙂 I am very much an introvert ... I do have friends, but I do not call them to hang out or anything. I am on the shy side as well. I am 65, married to a wonderful guy and I have one son, a daughter-in-law and a beautiful granddaughter. We don't get to see them very much, since they live out of state. I wait for them to be invited for us to visit them. Not sure what the protocol is on that... I think I would be interested in the Fabulous Friends 🙂
Maybe reach out to your son and ask him if they would like to come visit you sometime, I find my children love to come “ home”, have home cooked foods that they loved etc… can be a quick visit, not necessarily a full week , maybe a long weekend understanding and respecting their busy lives. ❤
I am the Principal of a small private school. It's challenging to develop friendships because I'm "the boss" or I "need" to talk to parents that are my own children's age about their kids. I just want to chill but I don't enjoy large social places like bars. You gave some great ideas so thank YOU, Ladies!!! ❤
I tried do organize female book club with apartment complex residents(even bought book and gave out to 10 ladies); no response. .Next tried a dog ice cream party for owners since so hot;. Both ideas were ignored and no one showed up. I thought about a man s book club or chess club for people here at my complex but told bad idea. My daughter said join 2 or 3 churches in area.. My next idea is to read 5 books on dating matchmaking and present a book review in one of our free meeting rooms at complex then see who comes. Or when warmer weather in parking lot set up table to play chess or dance outside see who comes to join me. I always decorate my porch which neighbors like to view. Funny thing dogs in area love me and get excited to when see me. I hand out dog biscuits when on porch. I just got an idea...wash neighbor s car in parking lot apartment complex & see if they notice. thank you for tips. What can I get the maintenance guys here (4 all very nice to me.? I thought about 5 bucks, stick of gum,& 2 candy bars (diet one and chocolate one),,,men like to eat. What do you think? I have like 6 good lady friends all over the US I write every few months who are special & need them even thought do not see them. Also every year do a New Year letter to these lady friends..
This was a fabulous video. For the introverts, my trick is: before going to an event, tell yourself you are approachable and people will want to come up to you and talk. It works! Also, maintain good posture - it makes you look more confident and approachable.
For seniors (especially in the United States of America) I don't know what other countries offer, but most communities have senior centers (age 50 and older ) all sorts of activities and some even some traveling
Heather, thank you for your great tips, can you share how you set up the “Speed Friendships “ activity? Did you have preset questions?, How long was the interaction 2 mins etc? I would love to do this with women I met thru out my neighborhood who don’t know each other. I actually met them by walking about and they are different personalities but all delightful.
I’m 58 and I still like answers quicker. My time is valuable and I like to be answered sooner than later. A week to respond shows me that the person doesn’t have time for a friendship with me.
Absolutely 💯 agree. I think it is quite rude if a friend would not reply in a reasonable time frame ❤
I’m in! This sounds like fun, to meet monthly online. Thank you, Ladies!
WooHoo! You're awesome Luann! Sending you a big hug 🤗❤
I really enjoyed this! I'm older and work from home, so it is difficult to meet new friends. Great tips on putting ourselves out there in the community. ♥️
I'm so happy you enjoyed this video
@djmaddox2005. Stay fabulous! ❤️🌸
Hello Shelly! I just found you tonight because I am turning 53 this month and wanted to learn how to get rid of my extra weight. I will be trying these moves, thank you. I got to this reel and love this conversation. I truly feel that “looking” isn’t the answer. I truly believe that we can manifest by imagining who or what kind of person we would like to meet and become good friends with and it would inspire us to be that person or a friend to that person or someone who spends time in that environment that that person we want as a friend would spend time in. This is law of attraction that brings us what we are looking for but we shouldn’t be looking for it. We should be feeling it and feeling gratitude for feeling that goal. Your answer of not “looking” was a great answer. We attract what we want!
Thank you for taking the time to share your comment Jennifer. Stay fabulous ❤️🌸
Happy birthday. I also turn 53 this month
Happy Birthday Ellie!!🎂@@elliemathews6884
I love the idea of the monthly catch up. What a beautiful thing to do!
Your video couldn't have come at a better time! In the last 6 months, my closest friends have moved away to be nearer to their grand-kids & my husband got a new job 7 hours away from where we've been living for the last 28 years. We're moving in 3 weeks & I've been dreading it... going from a small town to a big city and making new friends. Thanks SO much for all the great tips & helping to ease my fears. Count me in for the monthly get-together too. Sounds Awesome! You Rock!!💖
Thank you so much for taking the time to share how much you enjoyed the tips Roxy. 🤗 Stay fabulous! ❤️🌸
I really needed this. I watched to the end and will re watch it to make sure I really get it. I had a best friend that I grew up with and did everything with she was 5 years older than me but our friendship started when l was born. My mother adopted me as a single parent in the 50’s yes I am 65, anyway our next door neighbor became my babysitter and this is where my best friend lived, her mother babysat me until I was old enough to be at home after school by myself, but even then I would drop my school books at home maybe watch a show on tv or maybe not and go to my best friends house even if she was not there and watch tv and spend time with her mom whom I love so much. Well my best friend passed away in 2010 from cancer and my world just turned upside down forever. In the past 5 years or so I’ve really wanted/needed someone I could share my ups and downs with, someone to just be there with me through these very tough times and very good times. I know there’s will never be anyone like my best friend again and there will never be anyone that will mean what she means to me but I really really long for that person that will be my friend with no judgement and who loves to be silly but can be serious when needed. The friends I’ve made in the past 5 years are gone for one reason or another and when I heard you say those words “friends are in our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime, that really helped me make sense of the loss of those friends I’ve made but are now gone. Thank you for theses wonderful words of wisdom. ❤
Doris, it was so beautiful to hear about your friendship. What an incredible experience you will keep with you forever.
@@thekindnesshubprogram thank you so much for reading my post and thank you for your kind words.
❤ Bless you Doris! Stay encouraged and know each of us has a purpose… may you see the beauty in the next chapter of your journey. Moving forward while treasuring the memories of your friends. ❤
This is one to refer to over and over. Packed with such important and realistic tips. So much great nuggets of wisdom. Heather, thank you so much. Wonderful presentation, Shellea❤
Great talk and good advice. I never realized that I have lots of micro friends which is perfect for me at 57. I have always talked to strangers. There are so many interesting people out there. Although, I would never ask anyone when was the last time you were happy? That could be like opening Pandora's box. What if they said, "2004"? Yikes....🤔
I am in! Keep us posted on how and when, yay!
Thanks for taking the time to share this with me Paula. Stay fabulous! ❤️🌸
I find in social situations that I am better one on one, in large groups I tend to fade into the background and disappear. I try to join in the conversations but no one engages with me so I feel as if I am not interesting enough and give up. I am 61 and work from home so putting myself out there scares me a lot. I love your attitude Shelly and when I work out to your videos I feel so much better, so thank you for all that you do!!💗
I agree with you so much. I tried to do ladies book club in my apartment community, even bought each person the book to read ...no one was interested. Then tried dog ice cream party since many have pet dogs...ignored again.
@@janespitfire9884deatnsister, please pray to find a True Bible believing born again Christian church and you will find the love and friendship with JESUS and be loved on by HIS people🙏🏼
Wish we lived in the same building. I would love to engage in a book club or a dog ice cream party. How wonderful that would be!@@
i could have written this myself exactly how i feel.
Oh I can relate to your experience !! I am interested in friends who can help me grow and to learn more about me. Also that they feel the same way. I have always been a loner , not many friends in my life time. People who have come into my life I helped them in some way. Right now I have no contact with anyone. I stay at home and then go out and do normal errands. But when I am in a certain grocery store, the people their love talking with me, since I inspire them and just have fun conversations.. I am looking forward to meaningful friendships and their a thousands plus of starseeds I have not even met yet.. ❤ 🙏
Loved listening and watching this! I am a card maker and so I’ve given cards to random people in shopping parking lots! This one woman just said to me what a beautiful day it is as we were getting into our cars and that opened the door for me to offer her a package of my cards! She was so surprised and happy!
I keep them in my vehicle! P.S. I am on the shy side too) 😅😊
WooHoo! You are awesome Shell! Keep up the amazing work 💪🌸
@@fabulous50s Awe, thanks for the inspiration! You’re awesome too! Have a blessed day! 💕😊
What an amazing thing you are doing there with your cards!! it sounds like she was brilliantly surprised by your generous kind act! - Heather
I loved this. I work from home and have very little outside connections. Nos I know the people I see at the gym I chat with are my "micro" friends
WooHoo! Go you Denise! 🌸💕
I think the monthly catch up could definitely be a great idea ❤
I took the time to relax and watch the whole conversation very helpful tips I actually met new people going out by myself to a park or a bar i wouldn't call them friends but just the fact to be able to meet different people would make my day better, and thumbs up schellea for trying your best to help us women 😊
So wonderful to hear that meeting some new people made your day better! Thank you for sharing your joys with us. - Heather
Thank you so much for this interview. It really gave me inspiration to follow some of your tips. I never heard of speed friending before but it sounds like a fun idea. As my family is getting smaller and smaller (Due to age and sadly passings), it definitely helps having and making new friends. I am of course the other side of the planet based in the UK but I certainly enjoy all your great videos and tips. I also enjoy your exercise videos, you always makes it fun. You are a true friend to so many I see that more than 500 women has liked your video, so well done! xxx
Thank you so much for your beautiful comment Astrid! I am glad this gave you the inspiration you need. Sending you a big hug from Australia 🤗❤️
Thanks! I am so happy to know you!
Thank you so much Monica! You are so kind and I appreciate you. I hope your generosity comes back to you tenfold 🙏❤️ Have a beautiful day🤗
These are wonderful ideas that I needed! I've had major life changes - retirement and moving back home to care for my elderly mother. I'm grateful that I can do it but my whole social network fell apart. These ideas may help me be more intentional about making connections with people. I would be interested in the online idea you mentioned at the end. I'm not able to be out and about very much so online would be great.
Thanks for taking the time to share this with me Wendy! You can start by joining the Fabulous50s Community Group here... facebook.com/groups/290247628386380/ 🤗💕
Schellea, to follow in the spirit of your video and offer a potential positive way forward for those who have had a negative reaction and want to isolate themselves further, I wanted to share that since watching your video, and after seeing the Blue Zone doc recently and thinking yet again about how I want to connect with the community, I've applied to be a volunteer with AgeUK. Specifically, to be a friendly ear on the phone for the elderly who are lonely and need someone to talk to. I live in a different country from my family and best friend and oldest friends, and while I do have very good friends here (that I'd like to see more often), and I've made some nice connections at my tennis club, I felt that I needed to do something meaningful. Thank you for talking about how important connections and having purpose in life is for longevity - which benefits all involved and gets paid forward. ❤
Hi from the UK too 😊
@@Lifted11 Hi there! ☺️
I love your comment Denise! Keep up the amazing work and I’m so happy you’re part of our community ❤️🌸
@@fabulous50s Aw thank you so much Schellea! I have my interview with AgeUK tomorrow 😄
Yes! I am such an introvert and Love idea of meeting with a community here on line.
That is so great Stacy!! Thanks for sharing 🌸💕
Church groups and twelve step programs have been good places for me to meet nice friends. To have a friend, be a friend!
Thank you for sharing Jackie! ❤️ I hope you’re having a great day 🌸
I look very young for my age and I’ve never had any friends.. too much stress and drama.. I only keep pets close to me and keep humans far away
This is so excellent and something ive been struggling with ❤
Thanks for sharing Crystal! Sending you a big hug 🤗❤️
Thanks beautiful ladies. Very inspiring! One word of caution is to only talk to cashiers very briefly or wait until they are not busy. People in the Walmart line will kill you if you hold them up 😂. This video is a sign to me to pick myself up, dust myself off and try again!🤗🤗
Thanks for sharing Sandra! Sending you a big hug! 🤗🌸
I love this video..I so need girlfriends of all kinds…so hard to meet nice women in my area at my age..62.
You got this Teresa! Stay fabulous! ❤️🌸
Fabulous Friends sounds great! Count me in! :)
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I usually let people know that I do not respond right away to messages, everyone who I communicate with via e-mails, text messages know this , I make it a point to let them know ahead of time and most are OK with this
This is interesting 😊😊❤
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I know my hobbies and interests and attend things related to them. I know what kind of friend I want to be (and would want). I've known this for decades, but it's not up to me; it's up to others to take the offering and even when they do, they rarely follow up.
Thank you for sharing @dharma__3! ❤️ I hope you’re having a great day 🌸
This was so good. I find that I've become an introvert and I don't like it. FabulousFriends idea, awesome,!
Let me know when and where, if it happens.
Awesome ❤
Hi Gina ❤️
Have to say I do all these tips and it hasn’t guaranteed any kind of ongoing friendships. Maybe my life is destined to be microfriends 🤣
Well I got to 6:37 of this very infuriating video. My gosh who needs all that stress and wasted time. Only to find out, "Oops not that one".😂 I think my time is better spent on the things I do . When people "did" come to my place as they left I say. " I am who I am. Bubbly, caring and honest. If you don't like it, there's the door ". They haven't been back. YAY😅. OH one lot did wNt us to" Swing". No thanks 😅. Hard enough keeping up with one, let alone two or more😅.
Mmm all sounds good in theory, I'm at a stage where I want good long term friends not micro/acquaintances, friends to shop, lunch, holiday etc with and friends that live close by. I spend 98% of my time on my own and it certainly wears on your mental state. I think having friends gives you purpose and grows your mind and energy and creates interest in your life. I also think alot of what she was saying can depend on the community you live in. 🤷♀️🩷
I don't like to desperately force or contrive any situation.
Whatever is meant to enter your path will find you and mirror
back to you whatever you possess within you.
Work on yourself and do fun things you enjoy. Then if you meet someone
your vibration will be high and you will attract that which you have within
your being.
If you worry and force things then the results won't be as great.
I have to disagree with this. 2 of the best friends I have had now for over 25 years are because I was so desperate for intimate friendships that I went out of the blue I asked if they would like to go out for coffee sometime. That I was really desperate to make some friends. To this day it was one of the best decisions I ever made.
THIS 100%
I became a widow in my early 40s and have found it difficult to reconnect with friends. This was fabulous and I really enjoyed the tips to push myself. I would love to watch more sessions. I love the challenge idea because I'm an introvert and find it difficult yo approach anyone.
Hey Joanne! Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. please do let us know how you go with the challenge! - Heather
Are you watching me?😂 I’m in my pyjamas and haven’t done my hair! Great conversation and ideas, love it.
Sending you a big hug Barbara! 🤗🌸
What a wonderful interview! I am fortunate to have a volunteer job at our local library where I can meet new people of all ages and backgrounds, and we have repeat visitors who have become my library friends and whom I don’t see outside of work. It’s nice to hear their stories and get book recommendations from them. It makes the job more interesting and enjoyable! Thank you Schellea and Heather!
An absolute pleasure! Thank you for sharing about your library friends! I am beside my(shelf) :P in joy to hear they are giving you all the great book recommendations! - Heather
I disagree! So called friendships often cause so much drama in your life. I’ve reached a certain age in my life where I’ve reevaluated my life getting rid of the toxic things in my life and one reason why I choose not to have friends. Extroverts wouldn’t be able to do this because it’s the energy they get from people (energy vampires) that keep them going.
I understand, there are very draining people out there, but what if you're missing out on a GOOD person?
There are so many good people still to meet 🙌
At a bridal shower for my best friend's daughter, I learned that many of my friend's other friends also consider her to be their "best friend". We all need to find great friends like her: kind, there for you, mature / non-dramatic, and interesting to talk with.
Extroverts are not "energy vampires". We're all made differently. Bitterness isn't healthy.
@@fabulous50s 1:46 1:47
hi ladies
having returned home after many years, I found friends moved also. One day I pulled up my 65 yo nerve and walked across the street to meet the lady who lived there. Gave her my number. NOTHING. I have handed out so many products with my number on it and no return. Losing my interest.
The covid thing also is a barrier
if unvaxed meet up does not want you
I’ve started doing this much more over the last several years and it is wonderful how good it makes not only you, but the other person feel! I love to help make someone’s day better with a small compliment or something positive that you are thinking about them! Just a few nice words can make a big difference! I can be somewhat extrovert at times depending on who I’m around, but for the most part I’m introverted socially.
Absolutely amazing to hear about the small compliments and positive tings you are sharing with the world! Thank you! - Heather
I love this video on making new friends--I liked the discussion about giving a complement. Also remember if you are given a compliment--Graciously accept it!! We might not feel comfortable getting a compliment, but don't disrespect the giver by dismissing the compliment--just say, "Thanks"
YOU are amazing Diane! Thank you for sharing your wonderful comment and stay fabulous ❤️🌸
I thought I had a recent female friend because I'm 66 but seems like things that I would say she would disagree on but I never did that to her so maybe she just doesn't like me but I thought maybe that I was a friend to her because I had tried to be at least I thought I was but she's not speaking to me I was thinking that I had met a nice lady friend because she always talking like she was on the level but maybe she wasn't after all. Thankyou for sharing this video. ❤
I think you will enjoy the conversation, ReginaMay!
I really enjoyed this, thank you!! I'm looking forward to your idea called "Fabulous Friends". This was such a great video filled with lots of tips, for anyone!!
I love this!!!! Thank you!
I love 😍 this ❤❤
Let me know when you’re online ❤
I love this video and I love the idea of Fabulous Friends. You talk about the things that people don't talk about and the things we need to talk about. We so often think we are the only ones who feel this way, only to find through these conversations that what we feel is felt by many.
I am the same age as you Schellea, no where near the same fitness, but you inspire me every day to do better ❤
Thank you so much for your very thoughtful comment Annette ❤️ I am sending you a big hug! 🤗🌸
Take a class. I’ve made lots of friends in my water aerobics class and a pottery class. Volunteer. Offer to teach something. Take your dog for a walk in the park. Take your grandchildren to the park and take extra toys to share. Go to the park just to walk. Ask for advice. Start a conversation. Set an intention to enjoy your day.
I agree! So many easy ways to connect with others. ❤
It's easier to do all of those things if you don't lack confidence or suffer from low self-esteem. It's much more difficult for those of us who do to take those first steps.
@@catherinewilkes1755 the good news is that self esteem can be learned. Confidence can be grown by taking small steps. If you lack the courage, maybe talking with a therapist, or picking up a self-help book that speaks to you might be useful.
Thank you. I just finished watching the video. Your tips and different ideas are really great.
Thank you so much for your lovely comment Cheryl. Sending you a big hug! 🤗❤️
I’m doing something new, volunteering at our community’s film festival. Volunteering doesn’t have to only be about helping those who are down, it can also be about community and fun. My volunteer job will require me to talk with people, help them find their seats and cinema locations. This is a wonderful educational discussion. Thank you!
Completely agree with you! Volunteering is such an incredible way to be a part of the community and really really enjoy yourself! I remember once volunteering at a PAINT festival and it was marvelous. - Heather
YOU are amazing Lee! Thank you for sharing your wonderful comment and stay fabulous ❤️🌸
That’s a great point. I volunteer at a food pantry for the homeless and food insecure. But I should find a way to also volunteer somewhere fun to me.
Similar interests doesn't mean those people who do the same with me will be the kind of friends i would like to have, i will call them my acquaintances only not FRIENDS because to me when I call someone a "friend" that person also passed my secret evaluation of my so called FRIENDS.
I like this phrase about having a Friend for A reason, a Season, a Lifetime Friend.
Very interesting topic.
Great interview! Am interested in the online community you mention.
You are awesome Karina! You can start by joining the Fabulous50s Community Group here... facebook.com/groups/290247628386380/ 🤗🌸
I loved this. It's just what I needed to hear. I will watch again as there are so many fab messages in there. I'd love to be part of the Fabulous Friends. Thank you Schellea ❤
Yay! Glad you liked the video Julie! Sending you a big hug 🤗❤
Big fan of Shell. Started following her during covid. She's my lockdown friend. How do I find out more about Fabulous Friends?
Some simple acts of kindness are much appreciated and require little of you. While walking in my neighborhood I saw a woman walking across my path to her car. She was wearing a sequined dress for a party. I told her she looked nice. I said it spontaneously because she did. She was about 40 and bit chubby. Anyone who has extra pounds can appreciate that buying a dress can make you feel insecure. Her husband just missed my comment. It could have been a ”2 for”. Men like feeling that they have a pretty girl beside them. I also have opened the door for working men that have their hands full. They appreciate it. Thank you for taking this issue on. Maybe there would be less violence in the world if we all tried to be kind and friendly most of the time.
Fun and uplifting video!!! I love the "challenge"!!! Speedfriending sounds brilliant, I wonder if i can find one near me.😊
Loved listening to you, it depends where I am & who I’m with, sometimes I just feel better with my 🐶 Chewy🐾Hi Buddy
When I was in my 20's, I belonged to the Jr. Jaycees. I don't even know if they have that anymore.
When you go to your first conference, they have a contest with all the first timers, to introduce yourself to as many people as you can. They sign your book. I was the winner, competitive by nature. I'm also an introvert, very happy to be alone and mostly shy. But, I do not have to be. I decide to be. I think people decide to be this way or that and not necessarily a lifetime commitment.
Like being a leader or a follower. Well, most people are both. We lead when we need to, and follow when we can.
Thank you for this great talk! Loved the vibe and the message! Yes, we are social animals and need other people! And yes, I was in my pj's with my hair not done! 😂
Thanks so much Adriana! 🙏 I am glad you enjoyed the post and I really appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment ❤️❤️❤️
Most people who have a life don't care about making new friends. I feel like a loser trying to make friends by going to some event alone.
Playing with the semantics of the true meaning of the word "friend" presents a superficial solution. Interactions with acquaintances and passerbys are a delight but these never replace a true friend.
Wonderful and both of your positivity comes true the screen 😊thx
My husband became disabled and over the years friends dropped away and we just had each other. 3 years ago he died and I have family but no friends, it’s pretty sad.
Sorry, I disagree that it is harder to make friends as an introvert. I am social with strangers as well as my friends, but after a few hours, I need to be alone and “recharge”. I do think that it is harder to find new friends as I get older. Some people have so many issues and the political climate also causes people to be disagreeable.
Ways I've found a friend a really good friend for me was I bought a horse from one
Another one I have is she offered me a new bottle of laundry soap just because she had two I didn't need any but it sparked a conversation that made a beautiful friendship we actually prayed at the laundry mat together She's a wonderful person she always tells lady's how wonderful they look women that don't have maybe a spouse or a lot of friends it's really helps encourage them everyone needs encouraging
YOU are amazing Vicki! Thank you for sharing your wonderful comment and stay fabulous ❤️🌸
So it seems like the key is knowing what activities you want to do with this friend. I would never approach someone and asked it could sit by them. Odds are if someone did that with me i would be put off by them. I am resistant to change mostly due to fear.
I love that you did something new with this video. It isn't done by everybody.
I have no friends to hang out with. I'm 55 year's old I just have my husband ( he likes it that way). I do have 5 children as well. I would like to have a friend but I've noticed I feel weird and uncomfortable if I do happen to get to go somewhere with a cousin or something. I think I have social anxiety not sure. I usually am shy at first meeting someone but open up and relax after a bit of hanging out with someone. I'm nervous to step out of what my normal is. I'm the old person you spoke of. Lol. I'd like to be in an online community where women chat.
Thanks for taking the time to share this @Betrsafthensory! Sending you a big hug 🤗❤
I believe it's important to have friends who make you feel happy, energetic and are fun. To talk about hobbies,family activities, share knowledge and things they've experienced in life to share with others. Not to talk about drama.
Absolutely agree 💯 but it is soooo hard to establish good friends. Good friends are food for the mind and soul 🩷
I would love to jump on a monthly catchup - what a great idea
absolutely that's a generationally issue - answering messages
Shelly, thank you for having this video and inviting Heather. I am an entrepreneur (I have a lot of opportunities to meet new people in my job, but, still struggle with finding the "right" people that I want to be friends with. I love meeting new people , however, I am more shy and also do better one on one. But, I can be more extroverted when I want to be. I would love to connect better with other women my age. I think this is something we can all learn new tips on how to do this. I would love to be part of the monthly talks. I also just pre-ordered your course (making friends over 50). I'm very excited about the course and your possible monthly talks here.. thank you both. xo
Absolutely can not wait to unveil Fabulous Friends soon Marissa. :) I too am an entrepreneur, I understand. When there is so much opportunity to meet people, it definitely can be difficult to find the 'right' people - your people! Please do let us know what else you would like us to cover in future talks! - Heather
love you Shelly and your guest!
acts of kindness-tell someone's boss what wonderful service was delivered by their employee
I do that a lot! -no less a value, it makes me feel terrific. When commenting about customer service, phrase I use most often is some combo of "Professional & courteous. Thank that representatove for me."
Thank you for sharing Christine! ❤️ I hope you’re having a great day 🌸
This was great! I wasn’t too sure about approaching someone in the mall lol - and I thought if I was the person approached, I’d probably be a bit freaked out, like someone was invading my personal space, but the idea of stating it was a challenge made it a lot easier to contemplate on both sides. And I love the idea of “micro-friendships”. I have a history of having way too many expectations from friends and suffering big disappointment. Really good tips and ideas! I usually don’t watch videos longer than 10-15 min but I stuck with this one 😂
Thanks so much! 🙏 I am glad you enjoyed the post Donna and I really appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment ❤️❤️❤️
I don't answer messages right away either.
If we could find a friend like YOU Schellea we'd only need ONE .. ;] I'm still searching ... You are genuine and precious !
You got this Kathy! You can start by joining the Fabulous50s Community Group here... facebook.com/groups/290247628386380/ 🤗🌸
Hi. I would like to take part in the online friendship group. How do I join? Thank you both for doing this video. You two are so friendly and caring. I am a subscriber. I watch your videos several times a week. ❤
Go you Patricia! You can start by joining the Fabulous50s Community Group 👉 facebook.com/groups/290247628386380/ Sending you a big hug 🤗❤️
I need that deep connection friend. I miss it.
I loved your suggestions. I’m going to try them because I really am lonely these days. Thank you so much 😊
Let me know how go, Dorothy. Sending you a big hug! 🤗💕
I loved this! I have been praying for friends my age with common interests. These are step I can take.
I have already, for many years, been making 5-minute friends as I call them. In store lines , on walks everywhere. They just never bloom into more. I hope you go ahead with Fabulous Friends at a time those of us in The United States can attend. Maybe we will even find out we live near some of the other ladies and can meet up.
5 minute friends is such a great name for it! We will definitely let you know when Fabulous Friends is up and running! Thank you for sharing Julie :) Heather
This is so true! Community is key as we age. Love this topic. Loved this video 😊 I’m definitely passing it on ❤
Is this hair all yours? Gorgeous
So many gems in this- thank you! Sometimes you need to take a deep breath, put yourself out there and say hi to the world. And it usually says hi back! 😊
Thank you so much for your beautiful comment Janine. I hope you are having a fabulous day ❤️🌸
Yes, im interested in FF!😊
Yay! Thanks for sharing Liz 💪❤️
I love this so much! 💗Just what I needed to hear, thank you!💗👼💗
Thanks so much Sunshine! 🙏 I am glad you enjoyed the post. Sending you a big hug 🤗❤
Wonderful thank you ❤🎉
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It’s not about how old you live to it’s about quality of life. I only want to live as long as I can do things, go out and about, look after myself.
Exactly. My husband and I eat well, get out and about and meet people. Interaction in a shop is more to us as sometimes that person just wants to unload something that they probably can't do with someone they are close to. I just don't have time for sitting around all the time drinking coffee, wasting time and money. Talking about stuff that is so depressing and I can't change. Cost of living, kids of today, vaping. Yuck 🤢. Just writing those words is depressing enough 😅.
This was very interesting to listen to. I listened while I was on my rebounder 🙂 I am very much an introvert ... I do have friends, but I do not call them to hang out or anything. I am on the shy side as well. I am 65, married to a wonderful guy and I have one son, a daughter-in-law and a beautiful granddaughter. We don't get to see them very much, since they live out of state. I wait for them to be invited for us to visit them. Not sure what the protocol is on that... I think I would be interested in the Fabulous Friends 🙂
You sound a lot like me~
Maybe reach out to your son and ask him if they would like to come visit you sometime, I find my children love to come “ home”, have home cooked foods that they loved etc… can be a quick visit, not necessarily a full week , maybe a long weekend understanding and respecting their busy lives. ❤
Thank you so much for taking the time to share this Mary🌸 Sending you a big hug 🤗❤
Lol. I'm rebounding too. 🫶🏻
Sign me up, please?
Love this video!!! Can't wait for the community part of it! Thank you, Shelly and Heather!
I really needed this at this stage of my life!
This was great therapy to listen to - thank you dear ladies. I watch and DO your exercise videos, Shelly - thank you!!
I am the Principal of a small private school. It's challenging to develop friendships because I'm "the boss" or I "need" to talk to parents that are my own children's age about their kids. I just want to chill but I don't enjoy large social places like bars.
You gave some great ideas so thank YOU, Ladies!!! ❤
I tried do organize female book club with apartment complex residents(even bought book and gave out to 10 ladies); no response. .Next tried a dog ice cream party for owners since so hot;. Both ideas were ignored and no one showed up. I thought about a man s book club or chess club for people here at my complex but told bad idea. My daughter said join 2 or 3 churches in area.. My next idea is to read 5 books on dating matchmaking and present a book review in one of our free meeting rooms at complex then see who comes. Or when warmer weather in parking lot set up table to play chess or dance outside see who comes to join me. I always decorate my porch which neighbors like to view. Funny thing dogs in area love me and get excited to when see me. I hand out dog biscuits when on porch. I just got an idea...wash neighbor s car in parking lot apartment complex & see if they notice. thank you for tips. What can I get the maintenance guys here (4 all very nice to me.? I thought about 5 bucks, stick of gum,& 2 candy bars (diet one and chocolate one),,,men like to eat. What do you think? I have like 6 good lady friends all over the US I write every few months who are special & need them even thought do not see them. Also every year do a New Year letter to these lady friends..
This was a fabulous video. For the introverts, my trick is: before going to an event, tell yourself you are approachable and people will want to come up to you and talk. It works! Also, maintain good posture - it makes you look more confident and approachable.
For seniors (especially in the United States of America) I don't know what other countries offer, but most communities have senior centers (age 50 and older ) all sorts of activities and some even some traveling
This video was wonderful. Please know, you ladies have definitely found your callings. Thank you for sharing your gifts with us.
Go leg day!
💜
Heather, thank you for your great tips, can you share how you set up the “Speed Friendships “ activity? Did you have preset questions?, How long was the interaction 2 mins etc? I would love to do this with women I met thru out my neighborhood who don’t know each other. I actually met them by walking about and they are different personalities but all delightful.
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I have to smile at why we need younger people’s advice at this stage of our lives. Should be the other way around.
Good topic and information. Thank you.
I am glad you enjoyed this video Donna. Stay fabulous! ❤️🌸