If you're struggling to make a big decision, WATCH THIS.
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 ก.ค. 2024
- I believe that you should always use your heart and soul as the basis of your decisions because that’s how you align what you’re doing with your values.
Use your brain to look at the fine print and to weigh the options but when it comes to the actual “feel” of the decision, you always want to turn inward and check it against the feeling in your gut.
Wondering how to do that? Watch this video to find out ❤️
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I made the decisions, have started the process, and now am feeling the fear. still going ahead though. A New Beginning.
How are you now - a year out?
Yes update us !!! ❤
Great Clip, As someone with chronic anxiety, I often get decision paralysis, and in particular - any decisions that involve people pleasing or have an emotional component. When every option feels terrible, and it seems like a much, much bigger deal than it really is or that it does to anyone else it's debilitating and NOT making decisions like that causes a lot of problems. I'm looking for better tools for managing these situations ad this is helpful.
Your comment changed the perspective I have of myself, I have always felt that way but had no words to call it out - thank you!
Check out Naval Ravikant and Tim Ferris. They have some good quick help on exactly this. Usually if you are truly unsure about a decision the answer is no and you are probably scared to not please the person involved and it will be best for you to flex that no muscle.
I spent an entire week absolutely shredding my brain thinking about the decision I had to make and you have the nerve to swoop in here and give me, not the answer, but a way to decide, in only 2 minutes??? Wow. Thank you so so much. I know what to do now! :)
How did it work out
I absolutely love this. "Live in what's true for you, not what's safe in the moment"
Forget the 20minute Ted Talks on decision making. THIS is it! thank you
Ugh, this spoke to me..
For the past year and a half a family member has been asking me and my other family members to move out. I found a place and was super excited as this will be my first time out on my own - I was hoping they'd be happy for me but made they situation all about them when in reality they chose the outcome. I love this person with all my heart and have often sacrificed my happiness for theirs and it's still not enough. While this change may alter our relationship I think this will be the best for my well being and growth. Thank you for this!
I've gone through so much physical, verbal abuse my whole life which led to hatred of my own existence. But after 2 years of not deciding, I have put up the courage to pursue what I wanna do with my life. The decision is about my expansion and my life.
U can tell what decision u made
What does it mean by expansion?
It is like Mell reads my mind. Whenever i am struggling with something and she pops out with a solution! Thanka Mel!
I knoww
I’m in the middle of one myself. A job that is unfulfilling and being stressed every day. Being stressed to start my work day. Good pay but it is with me every day and waking hour.
I decided a few months ago to retire early from my job. Good pay etc, but “my life “ is more important. It will be financially tight for a couple of years but I’m so excited for whatever is ahead. I know it’s the best decision for me !
Have a backup plan
@@stylestory1000 Sometimes its not possible. I have already put out feelers with previous coworkers and may be able to go back to a previous position which was less pay but much less stressful. Meanwhile I brush up my design skills again and try to learn more on UX design and see if that is a career path. I am thankful to have a job where my housing is secured so only need to worry for money for expenses but my wife works so we will be tight but not in financial trouble. Who knows, maybe this is the turning point I need to make a different career path.
@@brandondelgado7731 that is the plan. Wish you the very best.
Have had a few of those moments. I usually get clarity when I remove money from the equation.
Thank you for this.. I seldom seek advice but am going through a really hard time in a relationship with children involved. I’ve been putting everyone else’s needs before my happiness for long time and I know I need a change. I’ve been making the mistake of looking outward and it’s made me focus on everyone else’s judgment rather that following my heart. My brain has convinced me the world is watching but it’s really not.. nobody cares. That false fear & self deception is enough to make the strongest person lock up in anxiety. So yes, thank you for your guidance. I refuse to look back in 30 years with regrets and sadness. It’s time to live!
I can't thank you enough Mel. I have been through some hard times and have come to point zero again. I am so confused to make any decision right now. Feel very helpless. This video is a great guidance for me.♡
Thanks,Mel.I really needed to hear this. Ive been contemplating a career change forever.It’s in my heart.I simply need to push forward with it.
The heart always. Silence the mind & our soul will speak to us. It’s knows before we do. Great video!! 😍
Mel, you are giving me a sign in this video. I am already in a dilemma on making a big decision that could possibly change my career. Thank you.
I so needed this video today. I just quit a job that was toxic and it made me realize that I don’t want to spend the rest of my working years putting up with bullshit for a paycheck. I’m trying to decide whether I should sell my house (which has significant equity) and downsize my life so I can work less and enjoy life more. I know it’s what my heart and soul wants, but my head keeps bringing up doubt about whether it’s a smart decision.
What decision did you end up making? I hope it all worked out, I agree about not working in jobs we hate, it's important to find a balance so we can support ourselves whilst feeling at peace with our work.
@@katec9893 I found a new job that I like. My co-workers are great! I’m staying in my house for now because it’s just not the right time to sell.
@@Mindyhartwick That's great about your new job, congrats and thanks for the update, it's always interesting to hear what people decided to do in the end.
The future is a fantasy.
The past is memory.
The present is now.
Mel! Thank you! I’m in the middle of that decision making moment and I was already trying to rationalize why NOT to do something I know in my Heart and Soul I MUST do. I love your way of comparing whether this will grow or shrink me and even though it might be uncomfortable in this moment I already know the rewards will last a lifetime. Thank you❤️
Rebekah Cox, you look stunning
Made my day ! Thank you :)
@@rebekah518 you are welcome my dear.I am Lioyd from the States.You?
Wow you are like a ray of hope, thank you for the clarity, love what you do ❤️ love and light to you and your family as well😇🙏
I was actually in a confusion for my current decision.. not only now but everytime I feel the same . But now I’ve got a clear idea 💡. Thanks for your words 👍😊
I absolutely love you Mel. You're such a beautiful and intelligent person.
Thanks a million, for uploading this video at the right time. This is a God sent message at this time of depression for me, strengthening me more for my decesion taken in life. God bless you !!
Ok I'm blown away. Most important 2 minutes I've ever heard in my life!
This video feels like a life saver for me 🙏🏻❤Everything that was said in this video was exactly what I needed to hear and I couldn’t be more thankful for it
Absolutely love this one.. i recently realize that theres literally ENDLESS choices to make everyday, and the best answer is the highest one.
Cheers.
Fair well said!!! I am on that journey or expansion and it’s terrifying 😟 but the possibilities are endless! All I keep telling myself... I have to try!!!
Follow your heart but take your brain with you 🙂 Thanks Mel!
I feel that I am hitting rock bottom today coz I made a major life decision yesterday. I woke up doubting my decision and planning to retract it. I feel so low like the world ended, but this video, you, are a saviour. Thank you for people like you. I feel better about my decision now.
My heart in both places and expanding in both , just different parts of expanding !!
Thank you so much for this short video!🙏🏻 I’ve making my decision now according to my feeling. Even it is terrifying.
It will open possibility!🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️❤️❤️
Thank you one more time.
Thanks Mel Love Ya Hang in there we are Brave Sisters
I don’t know how but this video showed up at just the right time. I’ve been on furlough since May 4 and have appreciated this time “off” because it’s the sabbatical I’ve been wanting for a long while. It’s allowed me the time to spend with mom and has relaxed the deeply entrenched attachment to my job that I’ve had for nearly 30 years. I love my job, but within the last two years, I’ve changed and it no longer reflects my views, plus our “new-ish” boss is taking us in a direction that I don’t agree with. An email exchange with a colleague today reminded me about my frustration at work, then I saw this video. Everything in my heart says to leave, but financial concerns are holding me back. I hope I can find the strength and confidence to make the cut. Thank you for this timely video! 🙏
Hi Sarah, if it's any help, I was in a very similar situation a year and a half ago. I loved my job and had a tight knit group of girls I worked with. However, I was so stressed that I finally made the decision to quit. It has been terrifying, especially financially. But I have seen the miracles (some small, some large) that keep happening for me and my family everyday. Just take it one step at a time, and remember the things you want are not always the things you need.
@@amandasoberano548 Hi Amanda, I truly appreciate your words and sharing your experience. Didn't mention it in my initial comment, but this break has allowed time for me to separate myself from my work and workplace such that I can objectively (instead of emotionally) think about things. I do believe the Universe hears people, and when we make the decision that's right for us, things fall in to place. But it's still scary to break the tie. Thank you for your support. Stay well.
@@sarahy5540hey sarah did u quit the job,,plss replyyyy
definitely came at the RIGHT TIME!!! thank you for putting it in those words "expansion"
WE DON'T KNOW WHAT TOMORROW WILL BRING. SO DON'T STAY ANGRY FOR TOO LONG LEARN TO FORGIVE AND LOVE WITH ALL OF YOUR HEART.DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE PEOPLE WHO DONT LIKE YOU. ENJOY THE ONES WHO LOVE YOU. 💕❤🌻
Wow, this is THE BEST decision-making process ever! Took me a minute to decide. Very grateful! Thank you!
Good decesion making and when it's going to affect your long term health and happiness your heart is the way to go. If you are not happy what you are doing it will not benefit you in the long haul. This is helpful Mel!
OMG Mel, thanks for giving me permission to move forward instead of being stalled with indecision!!
Debra J,hope you are in a good relationship cause you are too beautiful!
Mel...I just made a decision yesterday. It was difficult to understand but now I feel much better. (I made it!..)..and so I can be my Better Version... Thank you soo much!...🙌💐
the first few seconds in the vid..and i already got my answer, not that i didn't know it..but there are always self doubts..but i am certain, thank you
I so needed this. Thanks, Mel. I will not silence me or my creativity despite the anxiety and fear trying to keep me small and safe. Courage to everyone here.❤
Agree 100% thinking safe/small not good for growth, so true. Love it❤
I feel like crying! I have been struggling to make a super big decision! Your point is excellent! Does this decision expand you?
What does she mean by “expand you”?
@@the_boss2194make progress in your life,,,
Hey missrelaxed u can tell which decision your are stucked for,,
Perfect timing for this empowering message, thank you Mel 🧡🙏
Brilliant! It's like training your brain to read what your heart wants!
先輩、ありがとうございます! This is genuinely just what I needed. I can’t express my gratitude enough.
As I face leaving my spouse and moving away, thank you - I needed this.
A brandnew approach to decision-making! A new dimension! Instead of listing pros and cons, putting the best question: does it expand/improve me? I stumbled upon your video the very best time, just while hesitating. And you give the perfect answer! Thanks a lot for your great work!
IIdiko T. Molnar,your pretty smile can make the news
How can it possibly be so precisely perfect for my problem? Thank you so much
You have posted this topic before mel. Still good topic to ask and I have used this to make a decision to leave the military and it was the absolute best decision I ever made. Thank you mel for posting
More impactful insight in 2 minutes than some can manage from an hour
Just saying 🙏
Thank you ❤🙏
I’ve been thinking about a huge decision the past few days and my mind was spiraling with possibilities and a huge list of pros and cons. But this single short video helped me clarify what decision was right for me immediately. This is such beautiful and amazing advice. Even if the “safe” way may seem more logical, if it ‘shrinks’ you then it’s not worth it. I may have to write down some notes on this and hang it up so I remember ❤ thank you so much!
But what she mean by all of that? That it “shrinks” me or “silences” me? Give me some examples please?
@@the_boss2194 hmm I guess like when you’re in a big room of people and you feel alone, or when you feel like something is holding you back from your potential. That feeling of smallness and lack of control. Something that makes you feel not so great about yourself, and maybe kinda lonely. For me, the decision that would have “shrunk me” would be living with my parents. Because I know that being there would make me feel like my autonomy as an adult would be taken away and I would be “shrunk down” to feel like a child again. My potential for growth for be hindered, so even though that’s a safe choice, it’s not one that I want.
Thank you soo much Mel. I need this badly😭😭😭
This helped so much I’m trying to make a decision on what school I’m gonna go two and have been losing my sanity over the decision. But now I know what to do and feel happy about my decision and excited for my future ❤❤❤
How this notification showed up on my screen at the rightest time! Love you so much Mel
Thank you. This is exactly the video I needed to share with a friend
Thank you! You helped me to know for sure that I made the right decision. 🌸
Girl! Now you got me watching your videos, I love it !
This is something which I was looking for. Thank you for guiding us!!
This was one of the best vdos i saw on decision making.msny of us think short term and not long term..but it did help me in making a decision wjich i was very confused about if i shud do it or not....thanks Mel
You had me at "forcefields". Good stuff and exactly what I needed to hear. The path to this message is.......a fascinating one for sure.
Thank you for this. Gonna make the call now
I so needed to hear this message. Thank you
All within 2 whole (hearted) minutes. A consultation with Mel is a good look.
Thank you!! I hope you had a fantastic birthday 🎂
This advice was surprisingly helpful. Thank you!
Wise words... thank you!
I truely agree Mel.
I needed this. Thank you so much!
I've watched this twice in one hour. And I don't know about using my heart but actually the questions you propose are very logical, big risk vs staying silenced and shrunken. The risk of big time fail and difficulty is always preferable to me than shrinking and ever be silenced again. I spent 27 years of my life being agreeable and understanding and shrinkin and despite it all one day a freaking psycho played a smear campaign on me and everybody turned against me. Ever since then, after I decided not to kill myself I also decided that no one would ever silence me or corner me if people were to hate me, it would for things I did and said and not for things I didn't do or say.Thanks Mel, thanks so much!
Mel: Trust your heart and soul💛
Thank you Mel 😊
I needed this message for my career pivot!
Thank you so much i am facing a big decision, but you made it simple, i know what i want i am just scared, but you made me see clearly now ,
Thank you Mel. I love you..
ok, going to that boxing class I wasn't sure about. I cbb but it will expand me and my future. Thanks!
Thank you Mel
Watching your video for the first time, made important decision of my life
Struggling between accepting an offer for a COO role at a new company or staying put in my safe current position. Thank you for the perspective
That answered my question, thank you. I'm Scared
Thank you MEL
That was amazing advice and really what I needed to hear in such a short few minutes. Thank you so much!
Thank you so much I needed to hear that
Needed this!
Thank you
What if the decision we are making is for the betterment of someone we love but requires a sacrifice on our time or puts a restriction on us in some way? Shouldn’t you make the decision based on what your values are even if it isn’t directly beneficial to yourself?
Thank you for this Mel gave me alot of perspective
Wonderful and Helpful. Like an answered prayer for me. I will check in with this criteria to make my decision. : )
Amethyst TheScientist,Hope you are with a good man cause you are pretty!
Oh Mel cannot believe I've seen this video today, mine is a new home from a beautiful flat where I've been for over five years. The new flat is senior living because I'm over 65 and will be a lot cheaper per month to rent!! The flat I'm in now has a troublesome male elderly neighbour who is a problem to me, and non existent heating, but is in a lovely position, very quiet and lots of other things I'm happy with but due to my deteriorating eyesight and mental health problems this other flat is being shown to me on Friday this week, decision very very big for me. It's truly is my future!!!! What's your feeling please, I would appreciate it soooo much Paula in sussex
You can also always change course.
thank you. I needed this.
Man is like the universe brought me here to hear this.
Some decisions are scary especially when you have children but what she said is ultimately true.
GL family. Stay safe. Stay strong in the dark moments. God is everywhere
I love this, and really needed to hear this advice, thank you!
Mel Mel Mel! It's so so so complicated😢
Wow, thank you so much for this❤
This is good advice, but I know from experience that the heart and soul are truly two separate entities. It's possible for something to stimulate your heart in a good way, while simultaneously impeding your soul in a bad way. Rare, but possible. What you said is very insightful tho, good video.
This is how I feel when I pull up to the drive through at McDonald’s
thank you for this
Definitely Expands possibility.
Merry 🎄 Christmas & Happy New Year....
Thank you 🦋
Thanks. That is very useful!🤗
The problem is when you don't have answers to those questions either.... but you still have to make a decision now
Agree wholeheartedly but my heart based option is terrifying to me. Yikes!
Kinda same here :
Fear is the enemy!
Love and healing light to all!
Both my options are slightly terrifying !!!
Go for ot. Yall got this!🤩
Everything you wanted is on the other side of fear. You have to “push” yourself to feel the fear and do it anyway
This is amazing, thankyou