Being in my older age and having experienced a lot, compared to most, it's hard for me to find something I disagree with Tim on. He lets me see how many wrong things I did along with the many right things I did. I'm still working on self-control and patience. I'm MUCH better at it but it does take effort, yet it has to be done.
Dear Tim, Teaching people to recognise when it isn't necessary to physically engage will save more lives than a dozen 'how to punch' tutorials. Please keep up the good work.
@Darth Skeletroll 2.1 I appreciate that there may come a time when the use of deadly force is not optional. However, unless I am in a profession where I may have to 'persuade' people to change their behaviour such as a police officer or doorman, usually, the best option is to avoid unnecessary conflicts.
My first civilian "combatives" instructor started his teaching off with things like, "Hold your peace. Do your level-best to avoid a fight. Don't start shyt. If that means haulin'@$$ by walking or running, do it..."
As soon as I saw the title I knew what the answer was gonna be, 'don't engage in one'. It's crazy to me how many so-called self-defense instructors give people ways to go out and potentially lose their lives or their freedom. Thanks for saving us from having to learn from a mistake you can't come back from, win or lose. TFT is one of a kind.
Tim thanks for keeping it real I became a father later in life. And I've been reviewing your channel for quite a while. And at the end of the day we all just want to go home to our families and our Community... Now I'm not looking to become a war fighter overnight but I just want to be A good sheepdog Thank you and God bless
Quite refreshing, a man capable of much in this area of combat/ fighting yet consistently teaches and encourages discretion and walking away. Leave your ego at home.
Thank you, Tim. I was in an argument in a public toilet once. The dude who offered to clock me did so while I was holding my 7 year old son's hand. I was a 4th dan at the time. No one tells you at training that when you may need to defend yourself, you'll be holding a 7 year old's hand. Looking back on it, I have to agree with you that saying something disrespectful to the guy myself, which I had done because I saw him as a threat to my child (he offered my boy some money as a reward for supporting the right football team) was the trigger for the guy to come at me. Sometimes internally bragging about your own training tempts you into cocky behaviour - when doing and saying nothing at all is actually the power move.
I admire the way you covered this Mr.Larkin, Well said! I was at a bar River city brewing Company here in Jacksonville, Fl and had a bouncer try to goad me into a fight. It was closing time and I was trying to finish my beer and this bouncer singled me out and tried humiliating me and shoved me from behind being as nasty as possible, but even in my drunken state I realized in the moment that there was nothing for me to win and self control got the better of me and I left. I didn’t care for bar scenes, even when I was single. I had enough common sense to ignore him as best I could and left. I wanted to punch the guy out because he was an obnoxious jerk and had no business working security. I was confident in myself and in my moment of temptation I did the right thing, even though it wasn’t easy. Some people get caught up in their pride and want to punish people for bad behavior, but you’re right in the final analysis it’s just not worth it. Had the guy persisted it may have been different, but I would have been the villain and I knew it.
Once Again - For a Man or Woman with young children at home - Nothing Good ever comes out of being in a Bar Drinking Alcohol. This being said by a Retired Chicago Police Officer who’s been at 100’s of Homicide Scenes.
People are to degenerate and diluted to admit the reality of that. They lie to themselves about it. Not all but most people in those environments are of poor character and have immoral-unethical intent. Or are there to have access to a type of person. It baffles me I know they have to recognize the trouble. Young people get a pass for so long but when your a grown woman or man that spends most of your time in a bar you are going to ruin anything good in your life. If your in a relationship, have kids or a great career you will jeopardize all of them at some point. It's not if something bad happens its when. They dumb down there animal instincts for awareness and play ignorant to honor or morals. I'm not saying I've never been there but it's like grow the fuck up.
Yes! I was with a group of colleagues doing an all-day implant placement workshop at the Dade County morgue, working on cadavers. There were a few with a special toe tag that were off limits until the Bascom-Palmer tech came to harvest their corneas. One of those was from Guatemala and had just been brought in that Sunday. The director told us he'd been involved in a bar fight in Overtown the night before and got shot twice in the chest. Any questions?
This hit home completely!! I've been in a lot of fights, many I didn't start but most were avoidable. After many years of training I realized the fight you walk away from is the fight you win... But I will say, I can never tire of hearing this message in your video because even at my age, people will test you. They will push your limits but it's up to you to decide the reasonable outcome by using common sense.
@@orangewarm1 that's where the discretion thing comes into play. It means to know to pick and choose your battles. Knowing when to keep your mouth shut. I'd say if you're attacked then obviously you're doing something wrong.
tim, been a follower for years (not brownosing) your absolute distillation of life or death encounters into stacking lifes odds in your favor is a winner! anti-social violence vs. a-social violence and your 24/7 tactical awareness never "rolls the dice". the world is a better place with you in it, thx.
You speak from experience and research Tim and its good advice. I'm also that mild mannered man, with some basic self defences training once a week. I often feel like calling out such idiots described in this clip. But often instinct and intuition deters me. One good self defence maxiim i heard from a, similar coach and would like to share with your viewers is :' Make sure you know what your aim is, whether its self protection or ego protection, the former is an imperative, the latter an option' i. e, we can accept insults, provocations, boorish behavior and avoid confrontation, but where we see that an assault upon us is imminent and avoidance or capitulation isn't an option, we must Fight, preemptively with full force in order to maintain self protection whatever the cost will be afterwards.
Very sage advice. Don't play. You really have no idea who you may be dealing with in these situations. You "lose", you're potentially going to the hospital or the morgue. You "win", you're most likely going to jail or prison. Or it's going to cost you a lot of money. If the physical plane has not been crossed, and the situation won't matter in 1hr, 1 day, a week, whatever... walk away. A bruised ego heals better than a fractured skull.
One thing I've noticed is that people who have not been exposed to what REAL violence looks like, it's effects, are quickest to engage in stuff they know little about. People who have been exposed to real violence, especially dishing it out, know that it's nothing to be toyed around with. Most legit tough guys (who are not true sociopaths) try to avoid it.
A LOT of money. As a CQC instructor said to me once, "Do you have half a million dollars, or more, to defend yourself in court at a criminal trial? Do you know that if the other guy dies at any point in the next ten years, and a coroner determines the cause was complications from your laying the smack down on him, you're going to be charged? It's not worth it, folks. Walk away."
I've studied Tim Larkin's material for 15 years! One of the big takeaways for me- which became even clearer when carrying a legally concealed firearm- is that the best way to win was not to play. Just walk away in every instance than you can, only fight if there's no other option.
So, as in a gun fight. The best way to win is to not be in one. Walk away. Even if people give you s**t, it's better to be alive than to have your name in the morning press as a memory.
I grew up in a rough neighborhood in Brooklyn, NY. during the '50s and '60s. I saw two different killings in bars. One by gun and one by baseball bat to the back to the head. I was present during over a dozen bar fights in my youth and I won every single one. I walked out the door. The one time that I couldn't I was lucky enough to overpower my assailant and pin him to the ground for over an hour until he had no fight left. I wouldn't want to count on that again.
Tim, much respect for this. Walk away. I've been in 3 bar fights in my youth. All pointless and avoidable. Que sticks broken, billiard balls thrown, broken bottles stabbing, stools used as clubs. Minor injuries, some blood, bruises, and broken knuckles but no major trauma or death thank God. But all Stooopid! All pointless and avoidable. I've been a bartender for 15+ years. And I've seen some nasty bloody fights break out in my bars. Many I had to break up myself and drag the fools outside. All for dumb shit. None were worth dying over. Walk away., and live. Thank you Tim
Enter the Dragon had a scene where Bruce Lee wins a fight, because he did not fight. He just pretended he would, tricked a jerk into a boat, and then sent him adrift. Bruce wins!!!
This is such an important video. A saying I love goes: If you want peace of mind learn to mind your own business. I hope you get through to people. Thanks for putting out videos with meaning and value.
Absolutely right! The only time violence is the answer is when it is the only answer. I learned a long time ago that you can talk, walk, or run, and be just fine with yourself, and with those around you. Almost 75 years of life, and not afraid to leave a situation that can go horribly wrong. Thanks, Tim!!!!! Best advice. It saves lives.
Having watched many of your videos I knew the answer would be as indicated...but still, admiring your work, wanted to see your presentation. And added bonus, I remember "War Games" and actually bought the DVD years ago. The message is worthy of multiple repetitions.
I have only just started Tim's lessons and have learned a lot so far. His comment about "rolling the dice " is just that. One has no idea how it will go.
TFT in a nutshell. Walking away is the best defense, but if you have absolutely no other choice and you and yours are in a weapon is the only answer situation, train your mind and body to end a deadly encounter quickly in your favor. It is the only real winning scenario.
I call this mind your business tactic. I am a senior who grew up in a dangerous place. Minding my business was the first lesson I learned. 71 years later, it still applies.
GREAT ADVICE. It is refreshing to see such good, practical instruction. I've been teaching practical self defense in the American Combato system for 27 years and what Tim is talking about is so important - don't argue with people. I enjoy your you tube channel
The only violence that solved anything is non-violence. To hurt another person lessens you as a human being. In a physical confrontation, I'm not looking to solve anything. I just looking to survive and protect myself and my loved ones.
Here's how I win bar fights: go to liquor store, buy whatever I've got a taste for, take it home and drink it there. My undefeated streak goes back so far I can't remember. Early 1990s, easily.
Hi Tim, I did my time in the Infantry for the New Zealand army (look up Maori warriors) Couldn't really take a backward step in that environment. Had lots of bar fights (Good fun, by the way) I was in my forties, and a bit over weight and out of shape. Got challenged in a bar fight by a younger, fitter bloke and just said to him "I'm a bit out of shape, I will have to finish this quickly" He disappeared pretty quickly. The moral of the story is... The best fight you will ever win is the one where the other guy just walks away.
Respect sir, my dad got in a fight here in ireland back in the day, he gave the guy a right hook which put the attacker in a coma for three weeks, I've been in alot of fights myself over the years and ended up in Cork prison, I agree with Tim completely, it's best not to respond to 99 percent of provocation as its mostly the egos of men who grow up programmed that you must fight to be a man, the further along the martial path you travel the more you realise the real lesson of self defence if you've gained wisdom is defence from self 🍀🇮🇪👊
I appreciate this so much. My teacher made us read Lee's Tao of Jeet Kun Do, and drilled into us to run from a fight if we could. I've taught my children the same. The only guaranteed win is the fight you dont engage in.
Absolutely brilliant point made here, Tim. Glad I came across your channel. It can only take a nano second to change your life and the life of someone else. Yeah, someone can do something stupid and piss you off, but if it really isn’t going to hurt anyone, just put your feelings aside and don’t be too proud that you need to confront someone over something so pointless. Life or death is a different story.
Tim, Thanks for your videos. Your common sense advice needs to be heard by so many. Thank you for putting it out there. One request: if you ever reference another video that you want people to see, can you include it in the description below your video? Apart from that, I think you do a great job. Thanks for your voice of reason.
Once again, you astound me with your straight down the middle common sense. I remember I was in a bar and a huge fight with about 10 guys kicked off outside. I was with two women and everyone was saying let's go, let's go and I just explained was safer here. It eventually blew over ad we left. Alcohol and adrenalin makes people do crazy things. Even today I was in a traffic argument, and you know what I did? I calmed down (yes I was being aggressive) and apologised, and we swapped numbers and I phoned later to apologise for my behaviour. A problem with fighting is that although at times you can have a good outcome, any disablement or death of you or you viewed 'enemy' is a failure and almost always pointless. I was in military and the guys that were messed up in the head after combat.. it wasn't during combat. Many men get excited about combat.. it was reflecting on what they'd done to another human being afterwards. We're all able to fight and kill someone, all of us, but most of us can live to have deep regrets about such actions.
Great video. It is so easy to forget, to get upset by what happens around you, even when it doesn't directly involve you. It takes so much more intelligence and strength to walk away from the situation.
When I was a kid I took pleasure in destroying bullies... After getting suspended for scrapping for the seventh time in one year, my Dad told me this ... I get it. While you didn't start these fights you engaged and ended them... What you don't realize, is this: One day one of these idiots is going to hit their head when they go down and you will end up in prison for their death. This hit me right between the eyes, your choices can come with heavy consequences! Truths, thanks Tim!!
dont quite get it why i almos always end up watching tim larkn videos when im having a major hangover but it just feels most intelligent thing to do at the moment
I find this to be a fantastic channel with excellent reality-based information about violence. Thank you for your time and effort involved in making these videos. It's highly appreciated. Also, many thumbs up for referencing the War Games quote. Such timeless wisdom is invaluable.
Truth. It’s what I taught a student when I was teaching walking stick self-protection classes a couple of years ago: WALK AWAY. Truth be told, bars are not great places to socialize to begin with.
I can still remember our hand to hand fighting instructor, when our final class was done he gave us this advice. Never pick a fight in a bar. If you can’t talk your way out of it, pick up a bar stool/ chair, hit the other guy with it and then run like hell. This was USMC boot camp in 1967.
TIM, GREAT VIDEO !!! I LOVE THAT YOU TEACH AVOIDANCE EXCEPT WHEN YOU HAVE NO OTHER CHOICES !!! IT'S SURE SAVED ME A TON OF POTENTIAL GREIF OVER THE YEARS. AS THE GREAT FIREARMS INSTRUCTOR, JOHN FARNAM LIKES TO SAY, " DON'T GO TO STUPID PLACES, HANG OUT WITH STUPID PEOPLE OR DO STUPID THINGS" ! COL. JEFF COOPER USED TO WARN HIS STUDENTS TO AVOID BARS/ NIGHTCLUBS AT ALL COSTS !!! SINCE I USED TO WORK IN THEM AS A MUSICIAN, ON AND OFF FOR 40 YEARS, I CAN ATTEST TO HIS WISDOM !!! SAW EVENTS LIKE THIS QUITE FREQUENTLY !!! YOU ARE A GREAT ASSET TO THOSE OF US WHO WANT TO SURVIVE !!! THANK YOU, SIR !!!!
I appreciate your your words. I can see that you speak after alot of thought and soul searching. I've had similar conversations with various younger relatives. Is a end result that can destroy your life really worth a trip down ego road. My background USMC assaultman, back in the day. I still maintain my weapon skills and I'm no victim waiting to happen...but stupid games earn stupid prizes.. Keep up the good work SF
I needed to hear this and I also read about this very thing in the Bible about having self control and controlling your anger. I've got bad neighbors, bad co-workers and yes, I wish they would go away but that ain't gonna happen, not anytime soon anyway and that's for sure. It's hard to do and we are confronted every day by people who literally have no class like the assailant in this video. Leave it to fate, leave it to God to sort things out, that's His portion, not ours. Vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord (Romans 12:19) and how true that is. Be still and be quiet, rest assured, God knows what your enemies are doing and when the time is right, He will destroy them. Our job is to pick up our cross and don't let go. Before getting angry and allowing our passions to over rule our good sense, we're gonna wish we had simply chosen to get busy with shouldering our cross instead of sitting in a prison cell rotting our life away or laying on the ground dead.
I read a book all the time called tao te ching and there's a part in the book that reads for every force there's a couterforce and violence even maybe well intentioned meaning in self defense always rebounds upon oneself. Meaning even though you may have survived or won the issue can still effect you mentally .
Excellent video Tim, an inconvenient truth for big egos walking around. I would add that one could still be proactive in this situation by finding a safe place, calling the police/security and be a witness. Also warn others to stay away from the situation, a lot can be done safely and legally.
Romans 12:8..."In as much as it depends on you, live peaceably with all men." Tim actually is using a Biblical principle. King Solomon also taught us that there "...is a time to fight (war, kill)." Always a last resort. I have benefited greatly from your vids and just bought your book today. Thanks.
Hi Tim, > 2 months ago. I was in an incident, that I will call a road-age incident. In hind sight I can see both sides were contributory to the climax of the situation. We were in a stand-off as my car was boxed in by the other person's car. I could see even sitting in our cars, the other driver was much larger than me. I decided unwisely, out of pride and stupid ego to step out. The end result was not going to be good (mostly for me). Something then happened as I opened my door to come out. My small satchel bag which I was holding fell out as I was trying to hurry out of my seat. I was angry for this interruption, I bent down to pick up my bag and in my hurry I picked up the wrong end spilling contents on to the road. I was now really angry as I had to pick up the spilt contents. All this time the other driver was in his car, which had boxed in my car. He could no longer see me as I was stooped over to pick up my strewn shit. By the time I had picked up all my stuff ( at most 10s) and stood up. He had driven off. He most probably thought I had snucked out or was hiding. He didn't want to wait and had driven away. I thought about this incident for a long time after getting home. I believe the unusual intervention had saved me from an altercation. At that time, I did not think and merely acted on ego, I know I had a good outcome NOT because of good decision but sheer arse-luck. So everytime I hear a story similar to the one you have used as a case study. I just count my lucky stars. I also now try actively to EDUCATE myself on how to defuse or avoid any unnecessary incident. Thank you for your invaluable lesson. I'm practising it everyday
I feel that if people understood that the best way to use violence is only under extreme circumstances, than people would be nice to each other in the world would be a better place. But unfortunately the worlds not that way. More people need to understand and learn this vital information.
Born and raised in anti-social violence, worked as a bar bouncer for years, worked Las Vegas casinos for years... I can tell you the stupidity out there is off the charts. I've written stacks of hotel security and police reports a mile high--most of it could have been avoided! Tim said it, you just never know how it's going to turn out. So don't get into it, not in a bar, not in a grocery store, not out on a road rage, not at the craps table--not anywhere. Just get out! In my occupations (though I finally got smart and don't do these jobs anymore), I was by far and away better at talking people out of situations than anything else, but there's always that one or two jerks who are going to go off no matter what anyone says or does. Don't be one of them and don't be around them. Most of them don't end up a tragedy like the one Tim just described, but plenty of broken noses; lumps on the head; slip and falls; deep cuts from women's long, sharp, false fingernails; assault & battery charges; weekends in jail; knife cuts; stabbings; slashed tires; keyed cars; ruined expensive clothing; a criminal record; big fines; lawsuits--and the list goes on and on and on. It's not worth it. Just get the hell out of there. And grab a friend who's had one to many and get him out of there if you can. Surround him and sweep him away--and get out! You never know where it is going to end up.
I have to quote another TH-cam commenter from another video but it stuck with me, it was on a video about road rage. The statement goes, "If the person wasn't in your life 5 minutes earlier, why make them part of your life 5 minutes later on." It should go more like, "If a person wasn't part of your life 5 minutes earlier, why let them change your life and those of your loved ones forever."
Tim: I've taken 2 of your online classes and intend to make it to Vegas for your in person class. Can't tell you how much I've learned about violence from you. I honestly, prefer to walk away from violence. However, you have given me the knowledge of how to defend my loved ones if necessary. Dean
Only been involved in an 'almost barfight' once. I came in a bar with 2 friends and saw a guy being attacked, bleeding and leaving. A group of +/- 16 guys were the reason. We stood against a wall after that. One of the guys, a little annoying one came to annoy/challenge the first of us. Went away, came back and did the same to no2. Went away and I then turned around the situation, before he would come to me. I walked to them and said 'Is this funny?' to the little one. He tapped me on the back of my head and I looked at him. That was apparently enough for a bigger guy standing next to me to tell the little one to stop. I had no option to do nothing and had to turn the situation around. It worked. Could've ended bad, I know, but me not being impressed by them did the trick. Even the bouncer sat at the bar not doing anything, which was a wise decision, because he wasn't attacked and outnumbered. Terrible story about the coach. That's when you have a choice to not engage and in that situation I would've let it go. Sad he couldn't.☹️
Times have changed folks and more and more people out there are playing for keeps!!!! Use your smarts don't engage in a confrontation with idiots even if you win the fight you may loose the battle!!
![[LIVE] : ONE ลุมพินี 84 วันนี้!! คู่เอก "ก้องศึก vs เมืองไทย"](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3kuzsAIDf1c/mqdefault.jpg)
I've learned this so far from Tim. You win by walking away. Violence is only the answer when you have absolutely no other choice. Thanks Tim. 👍
Being in my older age and having experienced a lot, compared to most, it's hard for me to find something I disagree with Tim on. He lets me see how many wrong things I did along with the many right things I did. I'm still working on self-control and patience. I'm MUCH better at it but it does take effort, yet it has to be done.
"The only winning move is not to play." A motto that I apply to many things in life for the better!
Dear Tim,
Teaching people to recognise when it isn't necessary to physically engage will save more lives than a dozen 'how to punch' tutorials. Please keep up the good work.
@Darth Skeletroll 2.1 I appreciate that there may come a time when the use of deadly force is not optional. However, unless I am in a profession where I may have to 'persuade' people to change their behaviour such as a police officer or doorman, usually, the best option is to avoid unnecessary conflicts.
My first civilian "combatives" instructor started his teaching off with things like, "Hold your peace. Do your level-best to avoid a fight. Don't start shyt. If that means haulin'@$$ by walking or running, do it..."
@@tonyjones1560 Sound advice.
As soon as I saw the title I knew what the answer was gonna be, 'don't engage in one'. It's crazy to me how many so-called self-defense instructors give people ways to go out and potentially lose their lives or their freedom. Thanks for saving us from having to learn from a mistake you can't come back from, win or lose. TFT is one of a kind.
My krav maga instructor introduced me to Tim Larkin's work.
@@melanieortiz712 Wise guy
Ego was the underlying issue. Alcohol just intensified it. Control is a must.
Tim thanks for keeping it real
I became a father later in life.
And I've been reviewing your channel
for quite a while.
And at the end of the day we all just want to go home to our families and our Community...
Now I'm not looking to become a war fighter overnight but I just want to be
A good sheepdog
Thank you and God bless
Quite refreshing, a man capable of much in this area of combat/ fighting yet consistently teaches and encourages discretion and walking away. Leave your ego at home.
Thank you, Tim. I was in an argument in a public toilet once. The dude who offered to clock me did so while I was holding my 7 year old son's hand. I was a 4th dan at the time. No one tells you at training that when you may need to defend yourself, you'll be holding a 7 year old's hand. Looking back on it, I have to agree with you that saying something disrespectful to the guy myself, which I had done because I saw him as a threat to my child (he offered my boy some money as a reward for supporting the right football team) was the trigger for the guy to come at me. Sometimes internally bragging about your own training tempts you into cocky behaviour - when doing and saying nothing at all is actually the power move.
When I was learning martial arts, I was taught that the first move is a _backwards_ step.
Sideways is better.
@@RB-ye4ri
But that keeps you within range!
Sideways is better, if the action starts.......
Mark this is a humble thing to say: Good for you man. Got to learn the lesson before sharing with others. THANK YOU!
I admire the way you covered this Mr.Larkin, Well said! I was at a bar River city brewing Company here in Jacksonville, Fl and had a bouncer try to goad me into a fight. It was closing time and I was trying to finish my beer and this bouncer singled me out and tried humiliating me and shoved me from behind being as nasty as possible, but even in my drunken state I realized in the moment that there was nothing for me to win and self control got the better of me and I left. I didn’t care for bar scenes, even when I was single. I had enough common sense to ignore him as best I could and left. I wanted to punch the guy out because he was an obnoxious jerk and had no business working security. I was confident in myself and in my moment of temptation I did the right thing, even though it wasn’t easy.
Some people get caught up in their pride and want to punish people for bad behavior, but you’re right in the final analysis it’s just not worth it. Had the guy persisted it may have been different, but I would have been the villain and I knew it.
Once Again - For a Man or Woman with young children at home - Nothing Good ever comes out of being in a Bar Drinking Alcohol. This being said by a Retired Chicago Police Officer who’s been at 100’s of Homicide Scenes.
People are to degenerate and diluted to admit the reality of that. They lie to themselves about it. Not all but most people in those environments are of poor character and have immoral-unethical intent. Or are there to have access to a type of person. It baffles me I know they have to recognize the trouble. Young people get a pass for so long but when your a grown woman or man that spends most of your time in a bar you are going to ruin anything good in your life. If your in a relationship, have kids or a great career you will jeopardize all of them at some point. It's not if something bad happens its when. They dumb down there animal instincts for awareness and play ignorant to honor or morals. I'm not saying I've never been there but it's like grow the fuck up.
Yes! I was with a group of colleagues doing an all-day implant placement workshop at the Dade County morgue, working on cadavers. There were a few with a special toe tag that were off limits until the Bascom-Palmer tech came to harvest their corneas. One of those was from Guatemala and had just been brought in that Sunday. The director told us he'd been involved in a bar fight in Overtown the night before and got shot twice in the chest. Any questions?
"Mind you own business", if I heard my mother say this once I heard 1000 times. This is the best policy in a fight.
I’m really focusing on that being nice to people strategy.
I hope being calm in ones self is the focus
Good way to get fucked up!!!?
Me to - just until I have to stop to be nice 🔥
This hit home completely!! I've been in a lot of fights, many I didn't start but most were avoidable. After many years of training I realized the fight you walk away from is the fight you win... But I will say, I can never tire of hearing this message in your video because even at my age, people will test you. They will push your limits but it's up to you to decide the reasonable outcome by using common sense.
The word to the wise is best expressed in an old anecdote "Discretion is the better part of valor."
What use is discretion if someone attacks you?
@@orangewarm1 that's where the discretion thing comes into play. It means to know to pick and choose your battles. Knowing when to keep your mouth shut. I'd say if you're attacked then obviously you're doing something wrong.
Thank you
Thank you for this crystal clear message. At 60, I do take care of myself physically. Walk away is the answer.
@@QuantumPyrite_88.9 You got it right .
tim, been a follower for years (not brownosing) your absolute distillation of life or death encounters into stacking lifes odds in your favor is a winner!
anti-social violence vs. a-social violence and your 24/7 tactical awareness never "rolls the dice". the world is a better place with you in it, thx.
You speak from experience and research Tim and its good advice.
I'm also that mild mannered man, with some basic self defences training once a week. I often feel like calling out such idiots described in this clip. But often instinct and intuition deters me. One good self defence maxiim i heard from a, similar coach and would like to share with your viewers is :' Make sure you know what your aim is, whether its self protection or ego protection, the former is an imperative, the latter an option'
i. e, we can accept insults, provocations, boorish behavior and avoid confrontation, but where we see that an assault upon us is imminent and avoidance or capitulation isn't an option, we must
Fight, preemptively with full force in order to maintain self protection whatever the cost will be afterwards.
" Never interrupt a fool when he or she is seeking confirmation " .
"You want a fight? Step outside, If I'm not there in 5 minutes, start without me."
🤣🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Very sage advice. Don't play. You really have no idea who you may be dealing with in these situations. You "lose", you're potentially going to the hospital or the morgue. You "win", you're most likely going to jail or prison. Or it's going to cost you a lot of money. If the physical plane has not been crossed, and the situation won't matter in 1hr, 1 day, a week, whatever... walk away. A bruised ego heals better than a fractured skull.
One thing I've noticed is that people who have not been exposed to what REAL violence looks like, it's effects, are quickest to engage in stuff they know little about. People who have been exposed to real violence, especially dishing it out, know that it's nothing to be toyed around with. Most legit tough guys (who are not true sociopaths) try to avoid it.
A LOT of money. As a CQC instructor said to me once, "Do you have half a million dollars, or more, to defend yourself in court at a criminal trial? Do you know that if the other guy dies at any point in the next ten years, and a coroner determines the cause was complications from your laying the smack down on him, you're going to be charged? It's not worth it, folks. Walk away."
@@enockenock4183 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
I've studied Tim Larkin's material for 15 years! One of the big takeaways for me- which became even clearer when carrying a legally concealed firearm- is that the best way to win was not to play. Just walk away in every instance than you can, only fight if there's no other option.
This is what I said after the first 3-4 minutes. DAMN good advice. Just walk away if you possibly can.
I feel old. I remember the movie War Games where that quote came from.
So, as in a gun fight. The best way to win is to not be in one. Walk away. Even if people give you s**t, it's better to be alive than to have your name in the morning press as a memory.
Wise words - as always, Tim. A secret I have known for a long time. No winners.
I grew up in a rough neighborhood in Brooklyn, NY. during the '50s and '60s. I saw two different killings in bars. One by gun and one by baseball bat to the back to the head. I was present during over a dozen bar fights in my youth and I won every single one. I walked out the door. The one time that I couldn't I was lucky enough to overpower my assailant and pin him to the ground for over an hour until he had no fight left. I wouldn't want to count on that again.
10% of life is what happens to you, 90% is how you respond to it.
Thanks Tim for the videos, keep fighting the good fight.
Solid advice 4 a lifetime....let it go ... don't walk into a ambush, walk away. Thanks Tim
Tim, much respect for this. Walk away. I've been in 3 bar fights in my youth. All pointless and avoidable. Que sticks broken, billiard balls thrown, broken bottles stabbing, stools used as clubs. Minor injuries, some blood, bruises, and broken knuckles but no major trauma or death thank God. But all Stooopid! All pointless and avoidable. I've been a bartender for 15+ years. And I've seen some nasty bloody fights break out in my bars. Many I had to break up myself and drag the fools outside. All for dumb shit. None were worth dying over. Walk away., and live. Thank you Tim
Enter the Dragon had a scene where Bruce Lee wins a fight, because he did not fight. He just pretended he would, tricked a jerk into a boat, and then sent him adrift. Bruce wins!!!
This is such an important video. A saying I love goes: If you want peace of mind learn to mind your own business. I hope you get through to people. Thanks for putting out videos with meaning and value.
Before You Embark On A Journey Of Revenge or a bar fight, Dig Two Graves” - Confucius
Revenge is a dish best served in fiction.
@@garyslaughter9923 No Gary, My wife says Ice-cream is a dish best served cold. (I think she got that from the Klingons...)
Confucius liked a beer then!
@@garyslaughter9923 revenge is best served from 300 yards away with a rifle…… or not.
@@davidpalmer4184 That's because revenge is also sweet. Cold and sweet, it must be ice cream. In real life, I stand by my original statement.
Great advise Tim, I admire the guidance and values you place in your clips. God bless you and keep you safe.
Absolutely right! The only time violence is the answer is when it is the only answer. I learned a long time ago that you can talk, walk, or run, and be just fine with yourself, and with those around you. Almost 75 years of life, and not afraid to leave a situation that can go horribly wrong. Thanks, Tim!!!!! Best advice. It saves lives.
Having watched many of your videos I knew the answer would be as indicated...but still, admiring your work, wanted to see your presentation.
And added bonus, I remember "War Games" and actually bought the DVD years ago. The message is worthy of multiple repetitions.
I have only just started Tim's lessons and have learned a lot so far. His comment about "rolling the dice " is just that. One has no idea how it will go.
Love it, Tim. Good consistency on the message. Walk away from trouble if you can. Go all out only if there is no other choice.
An absolute golden life lesson. Everyone needs to hear it. Thanks Tim. 🙏🏾✌🏾
TFT in a nutshell. Walking away is the best defense, but if you have absolutely no other choice and you and yours are in a weapon is the only answer situation, train your mind and body to end a deadly encounter quickly in your favor. It is the only real winning scenario.
It seems clear that both parties under discussion in this specific video absolutely had other choices.
I call this mind your business tactic. I am a senior who grew up in a dangerous place. Minding my business was the first lesson I learned. 71 years later, it still applies.
GREAT ADVICE.
It is refreshing to see such good, practical instruction. I've been teaching practical self defense in the American Combato system for 27 years and what Tim is talking about is so important - don't argue with people. I enjoy your you tube channel
Tim, this video popped up again. Glad it did. This is a reminder that everyone should get periodically. Thanks.
He is completely right. Just simply walk away.
My martial arts instructor said when asked “can you dodge a bullet?” “Yes by not being there....”
The only violence that solved anything is non-violence. To hurt another person lessens you as a human being. In a physical confrontation, I'm not looking to solve anything. I just looking to survive and protect myself and my loved ones.
Amen! Bar fights and most fights aren’t worth the possible consequences.
Hey Tim, because I've learned from you how not to participate in anti-social aggression. It has made all the difference in the world. Thanks! Andy.🎶👍😊
Here's how I win bar fights: go to liquor store, buy whatever I've got a taste for, take it home and drink it there. My undefeated streak goes back so far I can't remember. Early 1990s, easily.
Hear! Hear! Hear what this wise and eloquent speaker has to say!
Tim, you make such good sense. You just never know the out come, and to get physical over something stupid just isn't worth it.
Best channel on TH-cam on the subject of violence. 🙏
Your channel is amazing Tim! This is one of the best self defense videos out there. Thanks for all you do! I’m so glad I discovered you.
Hi Tim, I did my time in the Infantry for the New Zealand army (look up Maori warriors) Couldn't really take a backward step in that environment. Had lots of bar fights (Good fun, by the way)
I was in my forties, and a bit over weight and out of shape. Got challenged in a bar fight by a younger, fitter bloke and just said to him "I'm a bit out of shape, I will have to finish this quickly"
He disappeared pretty quickly. The moral of the story is... The best fight you will ever win is the one where the other guy just walks away.
Respect sir, my dad got in a fight here in ireland back in the day, he gave the guy a right hook which put the attacker in a coma for three weeks, I've been in alot of fights myself over the years and ended up in Cork prison, I agree with Tim completely, it's best not to respond to 99 percent of provocation as its mostly the egos of men who grow up programmed that you must fight to be a man, the further along the martial path you travel the more you realise the real lesson of self defence if you've gained wisdom is defence from self 🍀🇮🇪👊
I appreciate this so much. My teacher made us read Lee's Tao of Jeet Kun Do, and drilled into us to run from a fight if we could. I've taught my children the same. The only guaranteed win is the fight you dont engage in.
Absolutely brilliant point made here, Tim. Glad I came across your channel. It can only take a nano second to change your life and the life of someone else. Yeah, someone can do something stupid and piss you off, but if it really isn’t going to hurt anyone, just put your feelings aside and don’t be too proud that you need to confront someone over something so pointless. Life or death is a different story.
Tim,
Thanks for your videos. Your common sense advice needs to be heard by so many. Thank you for putting it out there.
One request: if you ever reference another video that you want people to see, can you include it in the description below your video? Apart from that, I think you do a great job. Thanks for your voice of reason.
I'm reading you're book and I love it. Most of it I figured long ago (and still working on it) but also am learning a lot.
Once again, you astound me with your straight down the middle common sense. I remember I was in a bar and a huge fight with about 10 guys kicked off outside. I was with two women and everyone was saying let's go, let's go and I just explained was safer here. It eventually blew over ad we left. Alcohol and adrenalin makes people do crazy things. Even today I was in a traffic argument, and you know what I did? I calmed down (yes I was being aggressive) and apologised, and we swapped numbers and I phoned later to apologise for my behaviour.
A problem with fighting is that although at times you can have a good outcome, any disablement or death of you or you viewed 'enemy' is a failure and almost always pointless. I was in military and the guys that were messed up in the head after combat.. it wasn't during combat. Many men get excited about combat.. it was reflecting on what they'd done to another human being afterwards. We're all able to fight and kill someone, all of us, but most of us can live to have deep regrets about such actions.
Situational awareness and avoiding circumstances that can place you in a lose-lose result
My Sensei in Taekwondo (that's what he called himself) told me the best way to handle an altercation is to get away when you can. Great Video!
Great video. It is so easy to forget, to get upset by what happens around you, even when it doesn't directly involve you. It takes so much more intelligence and strength to walk away from the situation.
When I was a kid I took pleasure in destroying bullies... After getting suspended for scrapping for the seventh time in one year, my Dad told me this ... I get it. While you didn't start these fights you engaged and ended them... What you don't realize, is this: One day one of these idiots is going to hit their head when they go down and you will end up in prison for their death. This hit me right between the eyes, your choices can come with heavy consequences! Truths, thanks Tim!!
This is the most important lesson one can learn. Thank you.
Larkin is helping many with his common sense approach.
You are 100% right it’s not about fighting fighting as a last resort
dont quite get it why i almos always end up watching tim larkn videos when im having a major hangover but it just feels most intelligent thing to do at the moment
I find this to be a fantastic channel with excellent reality-based information about violence. Thank you for your time and effort involved in making these videos. It's highly appreciated. Also, many thumbs up for referencing the War Games quote. Such timeless wisdom is invaluable.
Thanks Tim makes one reflect and be better at defending oneself.
Of course. Totally right answer. Thanks for teaching real life survival skills.
Truth. It’s what I taught a student when I was teaching walking stick self-protection classes a couple of years ago: WALK AWAY.
Truth be told, bars are not great places to socialize to begin with.
I can still remember our hand to hand fighting instructor, when our final class was done he gave us this advice. Never pick a fight in a bar. If you can’t talk your way out of it, pick up a bar stool/ chair, hit the other guy with it and then run like hell. This was USMC boot camp in 1967.
TIM, GREAT VIDEO !!! I LOVE THAT YOU TEACH AVOIDANCE EXCEPT WHEN YOU HAVE NO OTHER CHOICES !!! IT'S SURE SAVED ME A TON OF POTENTIAL GREIF OVER THE YEARS. AS THE GREAT FIREARMS INSTRUCTOR, JOHN FARNAM LIKES TO SAY, " DON'T GO TO STUPID PLACES, HANG OUT WITH STUPID PEOPLE OR DO STUPID THINGS" ! COL. JEFF COOPER USED TO WARN HIS STUDENTS TO AVOID BARS/ NIGHTCLUBS AT ALL COSTS !!! SINCE I USED TO WORK IN THEM AS A MUSICIAN, ON AND OFF FOR 40 YEARS, I CAN ATTEST TO HIS WISDOM !!! SAW EVENTS LIKE THIS QUITE FREQUENTLY !!! YOU ARE A GREAT ASSET TO THOSE OF US WHO WANT TO SURVIVE !!! THANK YOU, SIR !!!!
I appreciate your your words. I can see that you speak after alot of thought and soul searching. I've had similar conversations with various younger relatives. Is a end result that can destroy your life really worth a trip down ego road. My background USMC assaultman, back in the day. I still maintain my weapon skills and I'm no victim waiting to happen...but stupid games earn stupid prizes.. Keep up the good work SF
I needed to hear this and I also read about this very thing in the Bible about having self control and controlling your anger. I've got bad neighbors, bad co-workers and yes, I wish they would go away but that ain't gonna happen, not anytime soon anyway and that's for sure. It's hard to do and we are confronted every day by people who literally have no class like the assailant in this video. Leave it to fate, leave it to God to sort things out, that's His portion, not ours. Vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord (Romans 12:19) and how true that is. Be still and be quiet, rest assured, God knows what your enemies are doing and when the time is right, He will destroy them. Our job is to pick up our cross and don't let go. Before getting angry and allowing our passions to over rule our good sense, we're gonna wish we had simply chosen to get busy with shouldering our cross instead of sitting in a prison cell rotting our life away or laying on the ground dead.
Tim this is the best video so far man
The art of fighting without fighting well done man
Absolutely love this. Wish I could have referred this to some my friends that are no longer here. Thanks and keep up the great work!
I read a book all the time called tao te ching and there's a part in the book that reads for every force there's a couterforce and violence even maybe well intentioned meaning in self defense always rebounds upon oneself. Meaning even though you may have survived or won the issue can still effect you mentally .
Excellent video Tim, an inconvenient truth for big egos walking around. I would add that one could still be proactive in this situation by finding a safe place, calling the police/security and be a witness. Also warn others to stay away from the situation, a lot can be done safely and legally.
Romans 12:8..."In as much as it depends on you, live peaceably with all men." Tim actually is using a Biblical principle. King Solomon also taught us that there "...is a time to fight (war, kill)." Always a last resort. I have benefited greatly from your vids and just bought your book today. Thanks.
Hi Tim,
>
2 months ago. I was in an incident, that I will call a road-age incident. In hind sight I can see both sides were contributory to the climax of the situation.
We were in a stand-off as my car was boxed in by the other person's car. I could see even sitting in our cars, the other driver was much larger than me.
I decided unwisely, out of pride and stupid ego to step out.
The end result was not going to be good (mostly for me).
Something then happened as I opened my door to come out. My small satchel bag which I was holding fell out as I was trying to hurry out of my seat.
I was angry for this interruption, I bent down to pick up my bag and in my hurry I picked up the wrong end spilling contents on to the road. I was now really angry as I had to pick up the spilt contents.
All this time the other driver was in his car, which had boxed in my car. He could no longer see me as I was stooped over to pick up my strewn shit.
By the time I had picked up all my stuff ( at most 10s) and stood up. He had driven off.
He most probably thought I had snucked out or was hiding. He didn't want to wait and had driven away.
I thought about this incident for a long time after getting home. I believe the unusual intervention had saved me from an altercation.
At that time, I did not think and merely acted on ego, I know I had a good outcome NOT because of good decision but sheer arse-luck.
So everytime I hear a story similar to the one you have used as a case study. I just count my lucky stars.
I also now try actively to EDUCATE myself on how to defuse or avoid any unnecessary incident.
Thank you for your invaluable lesson. I'm practising it everyday
Thank you for sharing your story. I’m glad you got a pass.
Truth. All the best Tim
Such excellent advice. I'll be teaching this to my family.
Thanks Tim. From Ireland 🇮🇪
Solid advice Tim... Great Job. Nothing Good happens after 11:00pm, and in some places "Never!" Lolol
I feel that if people understood that the best way to use violence is only under extreme circumstances, than people would be nice to each other in the world would be a better place. But unfortunately the worlds not that way. More people need to understand and learn this vital information.
Born and raised in anti-social violence, worked as a bar bouncer for years, worked Las Vegas casinos for years... I can tell you the stupidity out there is off the charts. I've written stacks of hotel security and police reports a mile high--most of it could have been avoided! Tim said it, you just never know how it's going to turn out. So don't get into it, not in a bar, not in a grocery store, not out on a road rage, not at the craps table--not anywhere. Just get out! In my occupations (though I finally got smart and don't do these jobs anymore), I was by far and away better at talking people out of situations than anything else, but there's always that one or two jerks who are going to go off no matter what anyone says or does. Don't be one of them and don't be around them. Most of them don't end up a tragedy like the one Tim just described, but plenty of broken noses; lumps on the head; slip and falls; deep cuts from women's long, sharp, false fingernails; assault & battery charges; weekends in jail; knife cuts; stabbings; slashed tires; keyed cars; ruined expensive clothing; a criminal record; big fines; lawsuits--and the list goes on and on and on. It's not worth it. Just get the hell out of there. And grab a friend who's had one to many and get him out of there if you can. Surround him and sweep him away--and get out! You never know where it is going to end up.
AGREED Tim. "Meekness"- Power under control.
This is incredible advice. Thank you.
Tim Larkin is Awesome!
Best self-defense information around. Thank you Tim.
The coach let his emotions get the better of him..
And wasn't prepared to deal with it.
Bad move.
I have to quote another TH-cam commenter from another video but it stuck with me, it was on a video about road rage. The statement goes, "If the person wasn't in your life 5 minutes earlier, why make them part of your life 5 minutes later on." It should go more like, "If a person wasn't part of your life 5 minutes earlier, why let them change your life and those of your loved ones forever."
the wisest words ever spoken.
Tim: I've taken 2 of your online classes and intend to make it to Vegas for your in person class. Can't tell you how much I've learned about violence from you. I honestly, prefer to walk away from violence. However, you have given me the knowledge of how to defend my loved ones if necessary. Dean
So true! Just not what big egos want to hear. If more people would take this advice, much trouble and heart ache would be avoided.
Another great video from a really great channel - Tim Larkin is a legend.
Best advice ever.
And 13 👎🏼? Haters, be gone.
Only been involved in an 'almost barfight' once. I came in a bar with 2 friends and saw a guy being attacked, bleeding and leaving. A group of +/- 16 guys were the reason. We stood against a wall after that. One of the guys, a little annoying one came to annoy/challenge the first of us. Went away, came back and did the same to no2. Went away and I then turned around the situation, before he would come to me. I walked to them and said 'Is this funny?' to the little one. He tapped me on the back of my head and I looked at him. That was apparently enough for a bigger guy standing next to me to tell the little one to stop. I had no option to do nothing and had to turn the situation around. It worked. Could've ended bad, I know, but me not being impressed by them did the trick. Even the bouncer sat at the bar not doing anything, which was a wise decision, because he wasn't attacked and outnumbered. Terrible story about the coach. That's when you have a choice to not engage and in that situation I would've let it go. Sad he couldn't.☹️
Times have changed folks and more and more people out there are playing for keeps!!!! Use your smarts don't engage in a confrontation with idiots even if you win the fight you may loose the battle!!
Again Mr. Larkin, your teaching is perfect!! God Bless! DB