So, in America a rich person can just hire the national guard to do his bidding? Nice, perhaps next you can rent out the military to a country that pays enough ; it sure is pure capitalism
@@the-trustees I wouldn't go that far. Not all humanity is bad, just those people who are greedy and lack compassion. There are still good people in this world, they just don't get noticed as often.
So Kristy Gnome is essentially sending privately funded mercenaries to another state? Isn't there a law that regulates these things or is America as hopeless as it looks?
Isn't it just so nice to hear an American President use words and talk about just things really . . . .like, anything really and NOT have it devolve into sounding like a 6 six year old who clearly didn't do their reading assignment.
We have the most bigly lightninging space reader in the history of the world. Yes this was an exclusive invention of my space force so it's totally my idea. Thank God for me for helping to monitor the problem that I helped to create and couldn't care less about in the first place. I know it sounds too smart for Trump but I'm doing my best so give me a break. 😂
@@pdag4685 You do know that Donald is only 3 years behind him and is far less healthy right? The health factor more than evens them up if not gives Joe a major edge on Trump. Come on man use some common sense.
@@DeathBYDesign666 and in 3 years they'll be supporting Trump after saying 78 is too old for president. They most be brain dead to have so little foresight 😄
People the buy fireworks for celebrations where they will also be drinking confuse me. At what point did planning to get drunk and use explosives seem like a good idea? Cause both took planning
I live in Indiana where they are legal. Two of my sons put on a display in a neighborhood competition and have done this for nearly eight-years. They take all precautions such as having fire extinguishers, water, and brooms to clean up the falling paper. So if your neighbors don't have these in place, blame them, not the law.
@3-7-77 perhaps it's quite different. Here in CT we basically just have sparklers or fountain fireworks. Nothing goes up more then like 10ft max. Except sponsored town events. So all of us who do get our hands on them typically have an over abundance of caution or have done so generations. I can see where reckless drugs in more city like areas could be an issue.
Lol that was one of the funniest jokes he had tonight…This was a really good episode…he was on point with all of his jokes…he is regaining his momentum now that he is back in the studio😁 I enjoyed him on the pandemic set but I didn’t realize how much I missed him performing in front of a studio audience…he really gets energized from the audience..and is quick to interact with them off script which is impressive 😁. It is just refreshing to see his energy along with his clean “cut” and sharp suit on…feels like a sense of “normalcy” is returning 😁 Good Vibes 😎
Countless, more than likely. He looks so coldly evil in his picture, like the political version of "Mr. Potter" from "It's a Wonderful Life" or a real-life "Mr. Burns."
@@tomasvdb really we need to lay out all the laws of the land and the constitution and reorganize them from the ground up. The emphasis being to use clear language, to update wording, to highlight conflicts for debate and revision, and improve the process for approving bills and checks after set time to determine if the bill is working as intended, if not then revise or remove it.
He confessed. And he was released because of **the way he was convicted** , not because any court or jury found him innocent. He is out on a technicality. Oh, and.......... HE CONFESSED
*It's so good to see you back in front of a live audience!!!* One good thing about the time spent broadcasting from your home and office: we got to know Evie, and she's adorable!!! We've all fallen in love with her!!!
Since when have any politicians stopped campaigning and on our dime. All campaigning should be illegal except for the 2 months before the election. They need to spend their time working for us, not their donors.
I hear that they spend a lot of time talking to donors about their next donation while in office. That is except AoC, Ohan, and prestley and bernie ( small dollar constituency donations).
Unfortunately that's not what they believe, and since they make the rules they are therefore exempt from them. Just look at how they react to having to walk through metal detectors that were installed for security, the same ones they had installed in schools for security.
It should also be illegal for them to avoid answering a question or try to throw mud at an opponent. If in a debate or interview they get asked, “what do you think of” or “what is you plan for”, and they don’t actually say, “this is what I think of this,” “this is our goal and we’d like to accomplish it this way,” “this is our goal and well we’re still working on details I would like to see this and this happen with it,” or even just “I do not feel like I have enough information for an opinion/we do not know how we would like to address that issue yet,” then they should be kicked out of the race. If there are any attack ads, or in a debate they try to go, “unlike my opponent” then they’re kicked out. If you cannot stand on platform then you do not have anything to stand on. If you refuse to answer questions when interviewing for the job then why should anyone trust you to do the job?
I can hear Donnie now.Trump Organization,never heard of it, don't know anything about it.I hear it's great but really,I don't know it.Maybe ask one of my sons.
Ohh the Trump _organisation_ ? So what? - this is America. No one will go to prison. There will be pissy fines they'll pay out of some slush fund they siphoned off idiot supporters, and they'll all walk away scott-free.
@@fl00d69 I dunno, we'll see how it goes. I mean if trump wants to fleece more supporters for cash, I guess that that's much less cash the supporters will have.
Me too, though it's more soothing to watch videos of baby kittens being rescued. Or Jay Leno's Headlines. Or Jim Gaffigan's standup routines. Still, I love Stephen and wouldn't want to miss his comments about Repubs missing a spine.
Why is everyone conservative so obsessed with going to the border? I live in south texas. I've been to the border. Aint nothing to see there. Do they imagine a war zone? Like the demilitarized zone in Korea? I dont get it.
It’s the ptsd of the Vietnam war having a porous border that helped cause America to lose that war. Seriously, bunch of people can’t get over a war 50 years ago so we create a culture war issue by making the border a boogeyman
You have to remember that trump supporters think trump was and is the savior of all mankind. They believe he fixed everything. They think climate change is when the season changes. They truly believe everything he says. I bet if you told a group of Trump supporters the sky is purple they'd look up and see purple not blue.
People send your paper straws to Texas. If we stockpile enough, us Texans can burn them in our fireplaces when we are freezing again this winter-spring
@@gamepapa1211 - No, many of us did not want Ted Cruz. Beto O'Rourke almost beat that louse. It's hard enough living in Texas. Must we be reminded so often about the evil that lurks here? Yet there is hope. We'll have some good candidates in 2022 and 2024. Maybe Beto will run for governor or senator again.
@@lindaleelaw5277 cotton is the same as most on the right-wing, playing soldiers, but when gets real, they're either at the back or running for dear life!
Cotton was in the army wasn't he? That was the lamest pushups I have ever seen from someone with military training. The other guy can be excused on account of being a fossil.
He is so great where ever he does his show !! They say 'Laughter is the Best Medicine' & Stephen has brought a lot o of people great happiness through this lockdown & before .. I love his show 💙 Cheers from Australia 🇦🇺💜🇺🇸
Donald Rumsfeld just died, so there's at least some good news. Granted, he died rich in his home instead of poor in prison, which kind of proves the lacking of the US justice system, but still. Let's be optimistic.
But the scariest clowns are the 75 million that voted for Trump in 2020. We don't have this circus without them. The GOP plays to that crowd. They even play to the far left loonies who think that getting vaccinated is a government plot of mind control.
The Entire Republican Party are Traitors to our Country! Trump directed an attack against our Entire legislative body with the intent of Terror, Kidnapping, and Murder of our Vice President, Pence; and the Speaker of the House! This was not a protest or riot this was an intentional over throw of our Government, so Trump could stay in power! Republicans supporting this Traitor are Traitors as Well! ARREST THE TRAITOR TRUMP, ASAP!
Make sure y'all go out and vote in each of your local, state, and presidential elections like you're voting #45 out of office again. Remind your family and friends to vote as well. Y'all, don't reply to the Russian Trump Bots. It only fuels them to keep posting.
🇨🇦Biden's statements on lightning detection is old news for meteorologists. The north American lightning detection network has been operational since the 1990's. I was partially responsible for setting up the Canadian portion. Even got an award for it. He's right that it has been used a lot to fight lightning sparked forest fires for years. It's about time the general public knows about it! Go Joe
The senators were trying to do pushups on stage... I think they need to have Michelle Obama show them how to do a proper pushup. The boys looked pretty sloppy and unfit with the example they displayed... bad form and a pretty poor attempt at a pushup gentlemen. Luv the show mr. Steven. Stay safe y'all
I bet the first of the fallen GOP hopefuls is going to be Andrew Giuliani, who received a pretty solid 0% support in this week's New York Republican straw poll, scoring exactly zero votes. Don't be too sad for him, though: it may sound like a devastatingly humiliating defeat, but by Giuliani family standards, it was just another Wednesday...
I had a totally *different* view of what a "pipehitter" was supposed to do and be. For example, I thought Mike Lindell would be more of a "pipehitter" than Mike Pompeo.
Mike Pompeo is really opening up a can of worms with that one huh? 2/3 will be videos of people smoking weed from a bowl, 1/4 will be porn, & the last 1/12th will actually be people dumb enough to support Mike Pompeo. I still feel bad for whatever poor soul has to moderate that site, though.
@@JustChuck1982 This is the closest I’ve ever come to feeling sorry for Mike Pompeo. You’re right that the poor site moderator is the one who will get the brunt of it, though.
@@Hollins23 you sure about that? Because I'm pretty sure using a slang for, let me consult my note here, "A person with an outwardly dominant, masculine, or aggressive personality, but who also enthusiastically takes on the submissive or "bottom" role in the bedroom" is most definitely NOT a presidential hopeful should be publicising.
Dishonesty, cheating, doing as little as possible, while trying to present the image, the appearance, of doing something is such a normal everyday way of life for Repugnacan'ts that he is actually cheating on doing halfway down push-ups in a public push-up contest within 87 year old man. So pathetic it's perfectly fitting.
@J. A.deflect much what does that have to with statement at top of thread. Can't you atleast defend him in his cheating? Ofcourse not because you saw the cheating yourself but now want to deflect which is normal republican 101.
"Per hunc… castissimum ante regiam iniuriam sanguinem iuro, vosque, di, testes facio me D. Trumpinium Superbum cum scelerata coniuge et omni liberorum stirpe ferro igni quacumque dehinc vi possim exsecuturum, nec illos nec alium quemquam regnare Americae passurum." Oath of Brutus (Revised)
@@victorarredondo304 Like he "won" in 2020? You lot out there, be careful. Covid can cause extreme brain damage, the most severe case we know of is causing a man to think he won the presidency despite losing by 7,000,000 votes.
While I like Stephan Colbert, he's no more than a political pundit. Celebrity presidents are not cool. They are demagogues who don't understand enough about government and law to do a good job. Trump should have taught us as much.
Oh you forgot the tropical blizzard. You did about 10 years back when you joke of Newport News. I was living there and couldn't bite we got that shout in July. XD
Exactly! If this was a democrat governor the republicans would screaming about private armies. Can you imagine if Bezos or some other billionaire the republicans pretend not to like if they're getting donations had done this? They'd be having collective aneurysm's.
@@tyroneanderson5619 Dude, the only substantive legislation that orange coward passed was a Billionaire's tax cut. Otherwise it was just a Twitter presidency: shrill, conceited and divorced from reality.
Oh my god, that Pompeo quote that somehow mentioned pipehitter, Grindr, and banging in one sentence to explain that pipehitter isn't a sexual thing is possibly the best political quote ever.
For those not in on the joke: Pipehitter. n. informal A person with an outwardly dominant, masculine, or aggressive personality, but who also enthusiastically takes on the submissive or "bottom" role in the bedroom. "I'm tough, Mike! I never give an inch! I'm partial to taking a few though..." "Ah, you're a real pipehitter."
@@gamepapa1211 Lol fair enough. I just think it's funny imagining how anyone would see that as a term of endearment formal or otherwise. But hey language is it's own art form.
"It's hard to keep your back straight when you don't have a spine."
Damnit Steven, I was taking a drink!
Stephen just did a John Oliver and might end up breaking Pompeo's site. Cant wait to see what people would be sending.
It’s a month later. Did it happen?
“It’s hard to keep your back straight when you haven’t go a spine.” Wooo!
SOB earned a like for that one.
So, in America a rich person can just hire the national guard to do his bidding? Nice, perhaps next you can rent out the military to a country that pays enough ; it sure is pure capitalism
What do you think happened in Iraq
Yeah, America rent out their military all the time.
Its a slippery slope from that to a true plutocracy... Humans don't deserve to continue to exist. Sigh.
@@the-trustees I wouldn't go that far. Not all humanity is bad, just those people who are greedy and lack compassion. There are still good people in this world, they just don't get noticed as often.
USa already kind of does that. Directly, indirectly, weapons sales, tech sale....now its just starting on the homeland
So Kristy Gnome is essentially sending privately funded mercenaries to another state? Isn't there a law that regulates these things or is America as hopeless as it looks?
They elected tRump, yeah it's that bad!
As a non-American I’m a bit confused and concerned.
No, it's as hopeless as it looks
May be that other state could raise their own privately-funded "national guards" to repel the invasion because that is exactly what it is.
@@MTMF.london The other state is Texas. Gov Abbott achieved orgasm at the thought.
So anyone can make a “donation” to a governor and control their national guard? 🤔🤯
A scary thought isn’t it 😳
No, just billionaires.
We should start a GoFundMe to raise money to pay the New York National Guard to raid Mar-a-Lago.
Since it's apparently legal to do that sort of thing.
Wellll....
Not technically, but...
how to put this...
Everyone has their price.
Welcome to our Capitalist Libertarian Republic shithole
Love you Stephen, thank you for bringing me and my friends Joy and laughter everyday!
@@k.j.305 ?
Love Evie too.
"It's hard to keep your back straight when you don't have a spine."
One of the best roasts from colbert, DAMN
* Colbert's writers
Savage
@@Hollins23 yeah, i mean the show
... I was laughing so hard I had to hold my belly.... D'OH !
@@Hollins23 It was delivered by Colbert, not his writers.
"a sexy understanding" sounds very Zapp Branagan.
Isn't it just so nice to hear an American President use words and talk about just things really . . . .like, anything really and NOT have it devolve into sounding like a 6 six year old who clearly didn't do their reading assignment.
We have the most bigly lightninging space reader in the history of the world. Yes this was an exclusive invention of my space force so it's totally my idea. Thank God for me for helping to monitor the problem that I helped to create and couldn't care less about in the first place.
I know it sounds too smart for Trump but I'm doing my best so give me a break. 😂
That joke is several years old, but thanks for messing it up anyway.
Sadly, a good portion of Americans want to go back to the orange one who talks mostly about himself.
@@pdag4685 You do know that Donald is only 3 years behind him and is far less healthy right? The health factor more than evens them up if not gives Joe a major edge on Trump. Come on man use some common sense.
@@DeathBYDesign666 and in 3 years they'll be supporting Trump after saying 78 is too old for president. They most be brain dead to have so little foresight 😄
As someone who got my backyard set on fire by neighbors playing with fireworks last year, I approve the fireworks ban.
People the buy fireworks for celebrations where they will also be drinking confuse me. At what point did planning to get drunk and use explosives seem like a good idea? Cause both took planning
What a shame banning them typically makes ppl want to more. Government telling people HOW to celebrate independence doesn't sit well for most.
I live in Indiana where they are legal. Two of my sons put on a display in a neighborhood competition and have done this for nearly eight-years. They take all precautions such as having fire extinguishers, water, and brooms to clean up the falling paper.
So if your neighbors don't have these in place, blame them, not the law.
Had a kid shoot Roman candles on my roof last year. I'm in too.
@3-7-77 perhaps it's quite different. Here in CT we basically just have sparklers or fountain fireworks. Nothing goes up more then like 10ft max. Except sponsored town events. So all of us who do get our hands on them typically have an over abundance of caution or have done so generations.
I can see where reckless drugs in more city like areas could be an issue.
That’s Not How or what the National Guard is for. I see legal action coming for that one.
Let's hope so. These quasi governmental officials don't have a clue about governmental rights and responsibilities.
Hello how you doing today?
"It's hard to keep your back straight when you don't have a spine"
Yep, I'm stealing that😁
@@michaelschweigart3517 Hard to steal a spine when you don't have one, amirite?
@@matthewbriggs9137 hahahaha 😆😂.... Wait, what? 😶
😂😂😂
Lol that was one of the funniest jokes he had tonight…This was a really good episode…he was on point with all of his jokes…he is regaining his momentum now that he is back in the studio😁 I enjoyed him on the pandemic set but I didn’t realize how much I missed him performing in front of a studio audience…he really gets energized from the audience..and is quick to interact with them off script which is impressive 😁. It is just refreshing to see his energy along with his clean “cut” and sharp suit on…feels like a sense of “normalcy” is returning 😁 Good Vibes 😎
Wow is Stephen happy! Great comeback to live shows. He’s punchin it. (Not pipe hitting) Audience psyched!
How many souls of immigrant children did Grassley have to absorb before he got on stage, though?
Probably all of them. That's why it's so quiet around the cages at the detention centers around this time of the year.
Countless, more than likely. He looks so coldly evil in his picture, like the political version of "Mr. Potter" from "It's a Wonderful Life" or a real-life "Mr. Burns."
Released doesn't mean innocent. Our system has a long way to go.
45 is still free...
@@oscarwarren469 ...for now.
in prison also doesn’t mean guilty… that needs fixing too
@@tomasvdb really we need to lay out all the laws of the land and the constitution and reorganize them from the ground up. The emphasis being to use clear language, to update wording, to highlight conflicts for debate and revision, and improve the process for approving bills and checks after set time to determine if the bill is working as intended, if not then revise or remove it.
He confessed.
And he was released because of **the way he was convicted** , not because any court or jury found him innocent.
He is out on a technicality.
Oh, and.......... HE CONFESSED
OMG. I hope there's a follow-up on Pompeo's Twitter feed.
*It's so good to see you back in front of a live audience!!!* One good thing about the time spent broadcasting from your home and office: we got to know Evie, and she's adorable!!! We've all fallen in love with her!!!
Nah
@@Whoopwhoopwhoop 😂
You're better than a mental health therapist. As always, thank you for the laughs!
"A sexy misunderstanding..."
"They're a grinder, they kept banging away!"
It's almost as if the earth is warming.
its a hoax from the fridge making industry, to sell more freezer to the americans...
Weird that the ocean is literally on fire too!
@@suzannegiannini85 I still remember when lake Erie caught fire.
@@CaptWesStarwind I hadn't heard of that, l'll look it up.
@@suzannegiannini85 It actually happened about 13 times before major steps were taken to reduce pollution.
Since when have any politicians stopped campaigning and on our dime. All campaigning should be illegal except for the 2 months before the election. They need to spend their time working for us, not their donors.
I hear that they spend a lot of time talking to donors about their next donation while in office. That is except AoC, Ohan, and prestley and bernie ( small dollar constituency donations).
Unfortunately that's not what they believe, and since they make the rules they are therefore exempt from them. Just look at how they react to having to walk through metal detectors that were installed for security, the same ones they had installed in schools for security.
In 1996 Bob Dole resigned from the Senate so he could campaign full-time.
It should also be illegal for them to avoid answering a question or try to throw mud at an opponent.
If in a debate or interview they get asked, “what do you think of” or “what is you plan for”, and they don’t actually say, “this is what I think of this,” “this is our goal and we’d like to accomplish it this way,” “this is our goal and well we’re still working on details I would like to see this and this happen with it,” or even just “I do not feel like I have enough information for an opinion/we do not know how we would like to address that issue yet,” then they should be kicked out of the race.
If there are any attack ads, or in a debate they try to go, “unlike my opponent” then they’re kicked out.
If you cannot stand on platform then you do not have anything to stand on. If you refuse to answer questions when interviewing for the job then why should anyone trust you to do the job?
There are European countries that practice that!
The real fun begins tomorrow with the criminal charges against Trump Org.
I can hear Donnie now.Trump Organization,never heard of it, don't know anything about it.I hear it's great but really,I don't know it.Maybe ask one of my sons.
Got my popcorns ready. Place your bets on who Baby Cheezus is going to throw under the bus!
yea dude! funning so hard
The Weasel's gonna sing
"man who is late although is beer gut is early" was a very under appreciated joke haha
"...he must really have to limber up on leg day." Now THAT made me laugh a whole bunch! : D
I Love Stephen Cobert! He tells me what I need to know and what I should research on politicians.
Plus of course he's Hilarious!!!!!
So this was taped before the news about Trump's organization getting charged.
Ohh the Trump _organisation_ ? So what? - this is America. No one will go to prison. There will be pissy fines they'll pay out of some slush fund they siphoned off idiot supporters, and they'll all walk away scott-free.
@@fl00d69 Or a later Republican Administration finds a loophole ala Bill Cosby and sends the convicted traitors free!
@Michael Robinson ohh hes human? i thought he fell off the short buss to a chocolate factory
@@fl00d69 I dunno, we'll see how it goes. I mean if trump wants to fleece more supporters for cash, I guess that that's much less cash the supporters will have.
@@TacoSniper666 😂😂😂
Good old 1:30AM Late Show posts keeping me company before bed.
Me too, though it's more soothing to watch videos of baby kittens being rescued. Or Jay Leno's Headlines. Or Jim Gaffigan's standup routines. Still, I love Stephen and wouldn't want to miss his comments about Repubs missing a spine.
OMG- pipe hitter and Pompeo had me literally rolling on the floor laughing 😂
I'm sooo with you, this is Hilarious 😂
the "send a video to pompeo" was a John Oliver move, well played thou Stephen
Why is everyone conservative so obsessed with going to the border? I live in south texas. I've been to the border. Aint nothing to see there. Do they imagine a war zone? Like the demilitarized zone in Korea? I dont get it.
Maybe they want to expand on the imperial manifest destiny march and conquer the whole Western Hemisphere!
It’s the ptsd of the Vietnam war having a porous border that helped cause America to lose that war. Seriously, bunch of people can’t get over a war 50 years ago so we create a culture war issue by making the border a boogeyman
conservatives are crisis actors. it's anti-biden propaganda and a distraction from their 1/6 treason
It's a cheap political statement that has no meaning in fact.
You have to remember that trump supporters think trump was and is the savior of all mankind. They believe he fixed everything. They think climate change is when the season changes. They truly believe everything he says. I bet if you told a group of Trump supporters the sky is purple they'd look up and see purple not blue.
People send your paper straws to Texas. If we stockpile enough, us Texans can burn them in our fireplaces when we are freezing again this winter-spring
Did Cruz escaped to Cancun again? We told you Texans to fill up his water bowl twice a day! You wanted him, so he's your responsibility!
Nope. Y’all Texans have libraries full of fuel. You’re literally on your own. Your grid can’t accept help from anyone. Vote blue.
As long as Abbott is governor we will definitely freeze next February.
@@gamepapa1211 - No, many of us did not want Ted Cruz. Beto O'Rourke almost beat that louse. It's hard enough living in Texas. Must we be reminded so often about the evil that lurks here? Yet there is hope. We'll have some good candidates in 2022 and 2024. Maybe Beto will run for governor or senator again.
@@shirleyrombough8173 good luck pushing Abbot into the rio grande, and your senators like Cruz to Mexico and whoever the other piece of crap is
"It's hard to keep your back straight when you don't have a spine" Stephen Colbert. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Best description of Cotton I've heard 😂
GOP gave t-RumP their spines and balls!
Explains trumps posture
Cotton claimed he served...nope did a montgs training.
@@lindaleelaw5277 cotton is the same as most on the right-wing, playing soldiers, but when gets real, they're either at the back or running for dear life!
Pipehitters: Mike Pompeo's version of the proud boys.
"Getting strangled by a rainbow" sounds like a Doctor Who freak of the week.
Sounds like how Mitch McConnell would describe Pride Month behind closed doors.
Points for the Doctor Who reference 😁
they fucked up angels. rainbows are obviously on slate.
I laughed so hard my belly hurts. One of the funniest monologues in a while!
My cat is now scared of me, busting out laughing randomly (on head phone).
His "private foundation"? Is that a non-profit or a charity? Hope so, cuz that will make it illegal.
They have nothing on him. It's just a show
Mike P. On "Grinder"? He don't see nothing wrong with a little "bump and grind"!
Mike Po would meat uh meet Mike Pe on Grindr.
So _that's_ what an ADA is... Actual Devil's Advocate.
Loved the phone number.
Cotton was in the army wasn't he? That was the lamest pushups I have ever seen from someone with military training. The other guy can be excused on account of being a fossil.
She's counting and I'm like ... zero....zero..zero 🤣
@@jf6962 I was actually taking points _off_ for bad form.
Those wouldn’t even count as push ups in a grade school gym class. Yes… zero. Zero. Zero 😆
Had me in tears of laughter. Hit that pipe, Mike!
Stephen, we can’t use water balloons to blow off our fingers we’re in a drought!
We could use Gatorade. It‘s got electrolytes!
for real, the water isn't a joke...
wow 2 2 min ads mid sentence ,
youtube truly sucks . they are worse than cable
Yep.
@@shahw2469 Adblock my friend. You can whitelist creators you want to support with ads, but I'm sure that CBS doesn't need the revenue.
Did anyone notice that President Biden didn't suggest raking forests to prevent forest fires?
IK,R? Biden’s not a craaazeh mofo, like the last one.
He didn't talk about exploding trees, either
A well-adjusted human being for a President!? My GOD! What a novel concept!
And that he pronounced several multi-syllabic words without slurring his speech.
I'm guessing Biden also didn't go on some rabid rant against windmills either.
Zing! "It's hard to keep your back straight when you don't have a spine" best burn I've heard in a while
Colbert is a darned comic genius, as good as ever.
Marjorie Taylor Greene should just have her Jewish Space Laser Guardians stay on watch for any wildfires.
lol
But don't you know it's the lazers that are causing them!?
She can send them to the TX-Mex border and save Gov Abbott tons of money on his border wall.
Republicans are gona blame the satellite Binden talked about here.
She's got the TIME 😆
Is it just me or did Stephen just get his groove back from being alone for so long? This was great.
I believe Stephen is much better with a real audience. I found it hard to listen to him talking to an empty room.
He is so great where ever he does his show !! They say 'Laughter is the Best Medicine' & Stephen has brought a lot o of people great happiness through this lockdown & before .. I love his show 💙 Cheers from Australia 🇦🇺💜🇺🇸
Bill Cosby goes free but not Britney Spears. To say that the justice system in the US is crap would be a massive understatement.
Justice ILikeBeer Kavanaugh and Amy Coney-Island Hotdog werent your clues?
@@id10t98 This was the Pennsylvania supreme court not SCOTUS.
Donald Rumsfeld just died, so there's at least some good news.
Granted, he died rich in his home instead of poor in prison, which kind of proves the lacking of the US justice system, but still.
Let's be optimistic.
It's the justice system of states, not the justice system of the country. Take 45 seconds to look up this information next time
"...it's hard to keep your back straight when you haven't got a spine!" You nailed it.... again
I so love having Stephen back at the theater!
There Is New Hope For The Senate
Demings In Florida.
Fetterman In Penn.
We Need More.
Love Fetterman! :)
@@wanderer0617 I do think Fetterman has a good chance at a upset win
Tim Ryan for Ohio
@RingsDaGamer6 Do you ALONE represent the entire State?
Let’s face it, grab the popcorn and cotton candy. This GOP is a circus filled with scary clowns.
Like Mike Pompeo and Tom Cotton.
Pretty sure even Pennywise would be insulted to think they're clowns like him.
But the scariest clowns are the 75 million that voted for Trump in 2020. We don't have this circus without them. The GOP plays to that crowd. They even play to the far left loonies who think that getting vaccinated is a government plot of mind control.
Sadly, it ends with one of them becoming a candidate.
The Entire Republican Party are Traitors to our Country!
Trump directed an attack against our Entire legislative body with the intent of Terror, Kidnapping, and Murder of our Vice President, Pence; and the Speaker of the House!
This was not a protest or riot this was an intentional over throw of our Government, so Trump could stay in power!
Republicans supporting this Traitor are Traitors as Well!
ARREST THE TRAITOR TRUMP, ASAP!
Wow. All the things that we were warned about 20 years ago are coming true. Who would've thought?
It’s almost like science (scientific examination of the physical phenomena occurring around us) doesn’t care if we believe in it or not...
Thanks Stephen Colbert Et Al. 🙂
So nice having him back in the studio with a live audience.
If it is the National Guard, can't the President deem it illegal?
He can federalize the troops like JFK and other presidents did during the civil rights.
I believe the President has the final say.
I hope so, cause if the army could be bought, then we are totally fucked.
Make sure y'all go out and vote in each of your local, state, and presidential elections like you're voting #45 out of office again.
Remind your family and friends to vote as well.
Y'all, don't reply to the Russian Trump Bots. It only fuels them to keep posting.
Vote Republican. Remove every racist unamerican democrats & save America. ❤
@@victorarredondo304 You should have told black voters that Democrats are the “racist” party. 87% of them voted for Biden
@@gregbors8364 we did. Yet they didn't get it. But hey according to sleepy joe, if u don't vote for him they're not black.
copy and paste!!!
@@gregbors8364 'If you don't vote for Biden then you aint black...'
🇨🇦Biden's statements on lightning detection is old news for meteorologists. The north American lightning detection network has been operational since the 1990's. I was partially responsible for setting up the Canadian portion. Even got an award for it. He's right that it has been used a lot to fight lightning sparked forest fires for years. It's about time the general public knows about it!
Go Joe
Your comments just made me check it out. Thanks for that! :)
I did not know that ...
Go Fred!
@@Greentrees60 👌
That's cool that you got an award for your work! Congrats!
The senators were trying to do pushups on stage... I think they need to have Michelle Obama show them how to do a proper pushup. The boys looked pretty sloppy and unfit with the example they displayed... bad form and a pretty poor attempt at a pushup gentlemen.
Luv the show mr. Steven. Stay safe y'all
So good to have you back in front of a live audience again!
The GQP primary: the Qannon Shaman .vs. the podium theif .vs. the man who put his feet up on Nancy Pelosi's desk
don‘t forget the couple that threatened peaceful protesters with loaded guns for the terrible crime of walking past their house while black
@@mekullag
And those that pooped inside the Capitol and smeared the walls with it.
...high standards those GQP'ers.
It's starting to look more like a freakshow than a proper primaries.
Sigh... I don't know if we can all be any more sick of this whole group, but we're about to spend three years finding out. 😬
@@mekullag that’s mark McCloskey ,he’s actually running for senate if you can fathom that.
Bill Cosby being released on a technicality is disgusting.
But he'll still die in disgrace, so that's at least something.
I love this show. Bet wishes from India.
Great energy! Loved this one.
"We'll be growin' oranges in Alaska!"
-Dale Gribble
Your bio: 🤘😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤘 #Subscribed
We could use some fresh fruit.
Please do the "Hunger for Power" games segment when the primaries arrive :)
I bet the first of the fallen GOP hopefuls is going to be Andrew Giuliani, who received a pretty solid 0% support in this week's New York Republican straw poll, scoring exactly zero votes. Don't be too sad for him, though: it may sound like a devastatingly humiliating defeat, but by Giuliani family standards, it was just another Wednesday...
I had a totally *different* view of what a "pipehitter" was supposed to do and be. For example, I thought Mike Lindell would be more of a "pipehitter" than Mike Pompeo.
Mike Pompeo is really opening up a can of worms with that one huh? 2/3 will be videos of people smoking weed from a bowl, 1/4 will be porn, & the last 1/12th will actually be people dumb enough to support Mike Pompeo. I still feel bad for whatever poor soul has to moderate that site, though.
@@JustChuck1982 This is the closest I’ve ever come to feeling sorry for Mike Pompeo. You’re right that the poor site moderator is the one who will get the brunt of it, though.
@@JustChuck1982 As the ancient adages state: "Any publicity is good publicity." and "There's no such thing as bad publicity."
@@Hollins23 you sure about that? Because I'm pretty sure using a slang for, let me consult my note here, "A person with an outwardly dominant, masculine, or aggressive personality, but who also enthusiastically takes on the submissive or "bottom" role in the bedroom" is most definitely NOT a presidential hopeful should be publicising.
The only way Lindell is hitting any pipes is if they're loaded with meth.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 loved tonight's show!!! Miss hearing Evie's laugh though...
I come back to this video all the time. Pipe hitters 😂
"It's hard to keep your back straight when you don't have a spine"
I think Hell felt that burn
Dishonesty, cheating, doing as little as possible, while trying to present the image, the appearance, of doing something is such a normal everyday way of life for Repugnacan'ts that he is actually cheating on doing halfway down push-ups in a public push-up contest within 87 year old man. So pathetic it's perfectly fitting.
It's almost as if its a requirement to join.
@J. A. Good one.
You can fake your intentions, but you can't fake pushups
@J. A.deflect much what does that have to with statement at top of thread.
Can't you atleast defend him in his cheating?
Ofcourse not because you saw the cheating yourself but now want to deflect which is normal republican 101.
How was he cheating at doing half way push-ups? I can see you calling those half push-ups or cheating, but not both.
Man, Stephen turned into John Oliver as soon as "Pipehitter" videos were brought up.
Barring the cuss words of course 😁
And the last guy offered up "Rake the Forests"🙄
Well yeah. Who wants to see all those dirty leaves or even touch the dirt? Gross. They're adding sidewalks to nature trails here.
@@Not-Sorry2011 ..please don't say you are for real.
@@idalarsen2540 keep off the grass, heathen. You'll walk where the government tells you to walk.
@Cherry Red idk what will piss the environmentalists off more. Me walking off the path or having a sidewalk on a nature trail.
Love you! Thanks for the laughs.
Whenever i need a good laugh i just you Steve, the pictures with discriptions always get me!!!
Orange Julius Cæsar announced today that he has made up his mind about 2024. The giftiest grift continues...
And he will win. Americas favorite president
@@victorarredondo304 favorite ridiculous president to laugh at
"Per hunc… castissimum ante regiam iniuriam sanguinem iuro, vosque, di, testes facio me D. Trumpinium Superbum cum scelerata coniuge et omni liberorum stirpe ferro igni quacumque dehinc vi possim exsecuturum, nec illos nec alium quemquam regnare Americae passurum."
Oath of Brutus (Revised)
@@victorarredondo304
Like he "won" in 2020?
You lot out there, be careful. Covid can cause extreme brain damage, the most severe case we know of is causing a man to think he won the presidency despite losing by 7,000,000 votes.
@@rdavis15242007 didn't you guys cry in 2016???
Real Opinion: Every single one of ya'll agreed that Dr.Colbert for Pres made our day greater:
While I like Stephan Colbert, he's no more than a political pundit. Celebrity presidents are not cool. They are demagogues who don't understand enough about government and law to do a good job. Trump should have taught us as much.
Who does Tim Scott think will vote for him? Ever again.
Only fools
He doesnt even "read" of a teleprompter, and his always pronouncing things correctly
Oh, there are a lot of idiots in America
3/4 of SC unfortunately
@@missyroades4533😡 yeah I know.
We got to 116 here in Oregon
Colbert with the shade!! 😂😂 Dying on the floor with the spine comment…
I know an old term for prison rape was "laying pipe".
I would beat my pipe if I ever got to see the show and Stephen live
The show’s lawyer must literally sit on the stage behind the camera with the cue cards
Killing it woth the monologue and meanwhile every day
Oh you forgot the tropical blizzard. You did about 10 years back when you joke of Newport News. I was living there and couldn't bite we got that shout in July. XD
I'm still not used to seeing this man on stage in front of a crowd. Am I alone on this?
Nope, especially as a Brit who only started watching these clips during quarantine.
His Private Foundation?
Is that a Tax Free Foundation paying for his own Private Army?
Exactly! If this was a democrat governor the republicans would screaming about private armies. Can you imagine if Bezos or some other billionaire the republicans pretend not to like if they're getting donations had done this? They'd be having collective aneurysm's.
American justice system = you are innocent until you run out of money
House of Cards.
Awesome throw back at the end 👍👍👍
9:21 😆😆😆🤣🤣🤣 Ohhh the _pranks!_ You phrase it like that, you're just _beggin'_ for pranks!
Trump's whole "presidency" was him just campaigning.
For the office of Fascist Emperor
you are such an idiot, he did more than obama did, sorry man but being graceful and having a nice image isn't everything
He golfed a lot
@@tyroneanderson5619 Dude, the only substantive legislation that orange coward passed was a Billionaire's tax cut. Otherwise it was just a Twitter presidency: shrill, conceited and divorced from reality.
He also fantasized his face printed on the $100 dollar bill
Dr.Colbert: President for 2024
Jon Batiste: Definitely, Voted
Batiste for VP, head of the musical interlude taskforce.
“Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, especially when all the eggs are rotten.”
Been there, in reality, not figuratively.
I *KNEW* he would advice Cuomo to send a video to Pompeo! Thank you Stephen, you made me laugh today! From Paris with love!
Good ones tonight, Colbert.
you're on fire with the knee slappers
Oh my god, that Pompeo quote that somehow mentioned pipehitter, Grindr, and banging in one sentence to explain that pipehitter isn't a sexual thing is possibly the best political quote ever.
Totally missed the opportunity for saying "Geoffrey the giraffe all grown up, Tom Cotton."
Are we pretending that Toys R Us didn't go out of business years ago? Or are we assuming that this was a joke specifically for '80s kids?
@@davidlundquist1979 actually toys r us is looking for a small comeback and it wasn't that long ago when toys r us closed.
Lol Cuomo's such a legend. What a pipehitter.
For those not in on the joke:
Pipehitter. n. informal
A person with an outwardly dominant, masculine, or aggressive personality, but who also enthusiastically takes on the submissive or "bottom" role in the bedroom.
"I'm tough, Mike! I never give an inch! I'm partial to taking a few though..."
"Ah, you're a real pipehitter."
@@gamepapa1211 The joke is that the term is ambiguous.
@@AlexDuWaldt I know, but I like the sex term better.
@@gamepapa1211 Lol fair enough. I just think it's funny imagining how anyone would see that as a term of endearment formal or otherwise. But hey language is it's own art form.
Stephen your on firê tonight, brilliant Jokes about Mike Pompeo great show
This was the most hilarious Stephen Colbert video yet! XDXDXD