Spoken) Mary Patrick: Mary Clarence, what's your favorite part of being a nun? Deloris: Well, I Um.. Mary Patrick: Come on! There's so much to choose from! (Sung) The joy of waking up at four A.M, right on the dot The thrill of meditating all day long in just one knot Mary Lazarus: Or how 'bout reading scripture 'Til your eyes begin to glaze Mary Patrick: Or basking in the magic of your favorite Latin phrase Mary Lazarus: The peace when you surrender all your pride Mary Patrick: Your name Mary Lazarus: Your gender Mary Patrick: Consuming holy wafers by the ton It's bracing Mary Lazarus: It's a tonic! Mary Patrick: It's a moral high colonic Mary Patrick/Mary Lazarus: Praise the Lord! It's goof to be a nun Mary Martin-of-Tours/Nun 9: It's grim and un relenting, But for those who love repenting Deloris: Praise the Lord! Nuns: It's good to be a nun Nun 8: [no no no you forgot the best part] Mary Lazarus: [Yeah?] Nun 8: [Yeah] There nothing like the rush Of doing chores for Christ our Lord Nun 7: Renouncing all possessions Is of course it's own reward Nun 6: And how about confessing For an hour? Nun 8: Two! Nun 7: No, three! Nun 10: Or teaching little children How to keep their palms hair-free? Nun 2: I love the sweet sensation Of extreme self flagellation Nun 3: And genuflecting always pretty fun Nuns: And we didn't even mention All the sexual abstention Deloris: Praise the what? Nuns: It's good to be a nun. Mary Lazarus: And hey, that's just for starters Nuns: All the lucky girls are martyrs Hallelu! It's good to be a nun Nun 1: Sacrifice Nun 5: Humility Nun 9: Obedience Nun 1/Nun 5/Nun 9: Hooray! Nun 1: Poverty Nun 5: Seclusion Nun 9: That's the best Nun 1: Oh, yes Nun 5: Indeed Nun 1/Nun 5/Nun 9: Amen Nun 4: And should Heaven will it, even misery okay Mary Lazarus: Only when you're miserable Can you feel truly blessed Mary Patrick: [So, the spotlight's back you, Sister. Your turn.] Deloris: [Right, okay. My favorite part of being a nun.] The whole no men with guns thing-- I mean no men, that's great That's tough to beat We eat Thank God I'm gonna lose some weight Costume disguise habit Gotta say, Woohoh And two big thumbs up For keeping out of public view You girls seem pretty sweet As for the rent it can't be beat And hey, not being dead That's always number one Plus no one's gonna guess I've gone commando 'neath this dress Christ, you're right All: It's good to be a nun Mary Patrick: Ha-ha-ha-ha Nuns: The strictness Mary Lazarus/Mary Patrick/Nuns: The compunction Nuns: The extremeness of the unction Mary Lazarus/Mary Patrick/Nuns: No, the praying Nuns: No, the kneeling
interconvent mixes tv diary how about that please say theres a jacuzzi where you sisters sit and chat wet bath table deck cigarette machines or even just a room with some old people magazines a couch a comfy chair a private bathroom central air i dont need them all just make them all all i have to say is damn i guess id better pray
Spoken)
Mary Patrick: Mary Clarence, what's your favorite part of being a nun?
Deloris: Well, I Um..
Mary Patrick: Come on! There's so much to choose from!
(Sung)
The joy of waking up at four A.M, right on the dot
The thrill of meditating all day long in just one knot
Mary Lazarus: Or how 'bout reading scripture
'Til your eyes begin to glaze
Mary Patrick: Or basking in the magic
of your favorite Latin phrase
Mary Lazarus: The peace when you surrender all your pride
Mary Patrick: Your name
Mary Lazarus: Your gender
Mary Patrick: Consuming holy wafers by the ton
It's bracing
Mary Lazarus: It's a tonic!
Mary Patrick: It's a moral high colonic
Mary Patrick/Mary Lazarus: Praise the Lord!
It's goof to be a nun
Mary Martin-of-Tours/Nun 9: It's grim and un relenting,
But for those who love repenting
Deloris: Praise the Lord!
Nuns: It's good to be a nun
Nun 8: [no no no you forgot the best part]
Mary Lazarus: [Yeah?]
Nun 8: [Yeah]
There nothing like the rush
Of doing chores for Christ our Lord
Nun 7: Renouncing all possessions
Is of course it's own reward
Nun 6: And how about confessing
For an hour?
Nun 8: Two!
Nun 7: No, three!
Nun 10: Or teaching little children
How to keep their palms hair-free?
Nun 2: I love the sweet sensation
Of extreme self flagellation
Nun 3: And genuflecting always pretty fun
Nuns: And we didn't even mention
All the sexual abstention
Deloris: Praise the what?
Nuns: It's good to be a nun.
Mary Lazarus: And hey, that's just for starters
Nuns: All the lucky girls are martyrs
Hallelu! It's good to be a nun
Nun 1: Sacrifice
Nun 5: Humility
Nun 9: Obedience
Nun 1/Nun 5/Nun 9: Hooray!
Nun 1: Poverty
Nun 5: Seclusion
Nun 9: That's the best
Nun 1: Oh, yes
Nun 5: Indeed
Nun 1/Nun 5/Nun 9: Amen
Nun 4: And should Heaven will it, even misery okay
Mary Lazarus: Only when you're miserable
Can you feel truly blessed
Mary Patrick: [So, the spotlight's back you, Sister. Your turn.]
Deloris: [Right, okay. My favorite part of being a nun.]
The whole no men with guns thing--
I mean no men, that's great
That's tough to beat
We eat
Thank God I'm gonna lose some weight
Costume disguise habit
Gotta say, Woohoh
And two big thumbs up
For keeping out of public view
You girls seem pretty sweet
As for the rent it can't be beat
And hey, not being dead
That's always number one
Plus no one's gonna guess
I've gone commando 'neath this dress
Christ, you're right
All: It's good to be a nun
Mary Patrick: Ha-ha-ha-ha
Nuns: The strictness
Mary Lazarus/Mary Patrick/Nuns: The compunction
Nuns: The extremeness of the unction
Mary Lazarus/Mary Patrick/Nuns: No, the praying
Nuns: No, the kneeling
interconvent mixes
tv diary how about that
please say theres a jacuzzi where you sisters sit and chat
wet bath
table deck
cigarette machines
or even just a room with some old people magazines
a couch
a comfy chair
a private bathroom
central air
i dont need them all just make them all
all i have to say is damn i guess id better pray