"why are you so quiet?" I don't know? maybe because i don't know you and doesn't know what to talk about? what do you expect me to say? human body is made of 70% water?
Top10 Nation Of course it’s easy to say hi. But maintaining a conversation with a stranger is difficult and stressful for some of us. Plus it serves no real purpose, and yet it’s socially expected. Social anxiety is a crippling condition to have, but mocking people only makes it worse.
My boyfriends mother didn't like me at first and was very judgemental of me (she now is close with me and loves me), all because I was quiet and didn't talk much and she thought it was rude and made her feel unwelcome. I just have a hard time talking to new people and need to know them before I'm comfortable before making small talk.
@Laura 7777 yes. same is true for me. also, i don't have a typical introverted demeanor/ manner of speaking etc. so the misunderstandings are always there, which is not only annoying but also sad, as they not only put labels like awkward, but also arrogant on you. Aargh.
“No don’t ask her, she doesn’t speak.” That’s because you don’t give me a chance. You talk over me every time I say anything so, why should I bother wasting my breath on someone who doesn’t care to listen?
"why are you so quiet? are you mad?" No I'm not. I'm actually in a fine condition just minding my own business until you asked and assumed things about me and now I'm mad. Thanks for ruining my vibe.
I used to think the same way, but recently I learned how important small talk is. Small talk builds a relationship. You get to know people and that is what leads to deep and honest conversations
No dude, you're being pretentious and you probably think you're more unique and deep than you really are (common among immature introverts). You cannot delve into meaningful topics if you've just met someone. Small talk is a great way to feel someone out and to decide if this person is worth investing time and energy into. Unless you just go around taking about the secrets of the universe with everyone you meet? But then if you did that you really wouldn't be introverts would you.
People feel a necessity to fill silence. They struggle with being comfortable with being uncomfortable. Though silence is sometimes much more powerful than words.
The last sentence is cringe. Silence isn’t more powerful than words if you just met someone. The only time that’s true is if you’re comforting someone. Otherwise you are just a brick wall that people are taking to
@@marie-nm9jo oh my god, someone finally said it! THANKS! i hate it when people say that or "silence is gold" -- yes, it might be if you're having a moment with someone, watching the stars. obvi. but introverts sometimes just sit in a room w/ you, staring at you and you're like "shit, what do you want me to do, juggle? why did you wanna hang if you're not keeping up the conversation i keep starting??"
I’m an introvert. I spend a lot of time alone. When I’m around people, I don’t speak much but will when I have to. One of the things that gets to me is when I do decide to go out or hang out with people and someone notices I’m not speaking much, and they make a comment. Then all eyes are me and it makes me feel awkward.
Your mom wasn't saying anything while being cornered by alcohol aggression. I'm glad she found happyness and freedom after someone pulled her out of that corner. Hopefully she is recovered because sometimes the abused become the abusers. Wish her the best ♥
That’s actually bad for introverts because that is what other people expect, if you don’t speak it means you think bad things about the situation or people that is why they are suspicious of quiet people. The truth is that sometimes I am just too overwhelmed, tired or I just don’t feel like speaking up and definitely it DOESN’T mean I am thinking bad things then.
yeah the friend i trusted most was always toxic to me and manipulated me into thinking that i was the bad person and they were the good person, i always felt like i talked way too much so im insecure about talking because of my old "friend" who told me that i was an alien and that i don't deserve to be human
i had a professor in college who straight up asked me out of nowhere if i was an introvert. i was taken back that i didn't say anything. yes, i am an introvert but the way she did it was like an attack on who i was.
"why are you so quiet" "well you are not a great talker" Me:"I may not be a great talker but that's because I am a great thinker, unlike others who talk a lot yet think very little." And that's how I reply when asked the irritating question.
I used to feel lonely when I was younger, then somehow I learned to transform my loneliness into solitude. Now I'm addicted to it, I'm happier and more creative when I'm alone. Many people think introvertedness is a curse but It can be an absolute bliss depending on your state of mind. Great video BTW.
Sooo much this! I am a 47yo ISFJ and I have only in the last 4 years or so really found the true bliss in being alone. My whole life I have always kinda felt I was missing out on something that extroverts inherently got to enjoy, only now do I realize they will never know the tranquility found in being at complete peace within yourself. ♡
I find I get energy from "good" social interaction (like when it goes the way I wanted it to or is meaningful in some way) but if it goes wrong I want to crawl in a hole and die.
When I was a kid, I always used to get asked why I was so quiet, and I was made to feel like it was a really bad thing. However, when I got older and felt a little more comfortable talking and speaking up more, people would literally tell me to 'shut up'.
Growing up I use to think I was the only introvert that existed. I was always, the quiet one while everyone else was totally the opposite. So glad to know there are so many other people that are introverts. I use to feel bad about being an introvert and wish I could be that extrovert. I've realized over the years that I am perfectly fine how I am!
Woow. A lot of people around me are introvert. I am extrovert. Sometimes I want more extrovert, really a lot of people introduce themselves as introvert and they are. I need people who are open and so on
I actually think introverts are extremely intelligent also due to the amount of processing they continuously do in their mind. Understanding the physics of life.
Not to be rude but shy is different from introversion, 2 whole different things. Also the last line of u don't know who you are seems like social anxiety to me.
Kylo Ren That was me a couple years ago. You find who you are with experience. Others learn faster than others... I thought I’d be shy forever and I had little self identity. Of course I was young then. I’m only 21 now and I’m still learning. Good luck. It gets better with time and self reflection.
Meeee tooo! For some reason people don’t understand others that just like to mind their business. They think I’m stuck up cause I don’t like to small talk.
I once met a girl who didn't understand why I don't talk much. I tried explaining to her that I'm an Introvert and she got VERY rude. Asked for my full name for whatever reason and thought I was lying.
dianameless That girl is a word that I don’t want to use in this peaceful and understanding comment section 😂. Isn’t it crazy how certain people are volatile when they don’t understand other people who have qualities that differ from their own? Really, what I think it was is that girl got hostile because she took your not wanting to talk much personally. As if your silence was a reflection of her. Most likely she has an insecurity (which she probably unconsciously feels makes her unworthy to talk to) within her that she probably felt was validated by you being withdrawn it that moment.
I'm an introvert, to the point where talking itself is draining for me. My best friend is an extrovert and although I love her to pieces, I secretly wish she wouldn't ring me everyday and then when I pick up ask if I'm okay because I sound down... I probably sound 'down' because I've been enjoying my own silence for a while and don't match her energy. That being said, we get on really well and although yes, I get the introvert hangover after spending more than an hour with her, I also get a lot out of our time together too.
My second day of college and it’s just too much small talks and social stuff, I want to make friends but I get drained out so easily and cannot carry on a normal convo :((
Juliet A. Loft G. Im probably not going to make friends either but we should just focus on our study’s and not make having friends our priority, eventually I am sure the time will come when you meet someone amazing xx
Oh, girl same. But I’n not going to college now, middle school, I know I am really young I am 12. I follow my friend and her group around and I am kind of friends with them but now I think they hate me. There is also a person from my old school in there, he didn’t really hate me, he was funny and I liked him but now he hates me. I have no idea what happened and why they are acting like that, maybe it’s something I did. They keep asking me if I’m sad and why I’m quiet and it’s really annoying. I made -2 friends but I have a chance to make +3, my old friend has anither group of friends, I follow her around because I have no idea what to do and I hate doing that. I am cringe too sometimes when I make jokes, sometimes I realise it and I think why did I say that? Sometimes I don’t and I hate I can’t realise it. So I might not be really fun to talk with, I am scared to start conversations, but not scared to talk when the conversation already started, is that weird? When I meet new people I have no idea what to talk about, only when we are closer I am very loud sometimes, and I talk when I want to, I am a bit shy. With new friends and new people I am really boring, so they often don’t become real friends.
I don't know why im watching this w/ teary eyes. I always thought there's something wrong w/ me. I hope someone understands my personality type more than myself. :(
Lana's tone vibrates with your heart. She told your unconscious what it knows about you and being patient. So to say Lana opened a window for your unconscious. amasing isn't it.
I honestly thought that i have a problem, because when i get tired after a 3 hour hangout w my friends,i get physically n mentally tired that caused me to become easilly irritable or just 'not in mood' . turns out, im an introvert? holy
Me too. Like I love my friends but sht like this happens to me. I don't wanna get misjudged but I think we really cannot do anything about that. It sucks so bad
I'm an Introvert. Extroverts are always trying to change me and i have changed but always go back to being my true self. An introvert. Thank you for all your videos. You are brave. Peace Love & Prosperity to You.
If men or women talk way to much and I cannot get but three words in and they keep talking, I have tension and feel like I'm undervalued. Then I get tired and withdrawn inside.
Absolute pet peeve of mine! I am, by no means, an introvert, but I get so drained by someone who incessantly talks AT me and doesn’t let me speak without interrupting. How have these people never noticed how rude they are?!
And it's so embarrassing too!! Especially when you're in a group conversation and you make the effort to engage yourself into the conversation but some people just interrupt you and talk over you to say their thing. So rude. I usually give up and stop talking because it's way too exhausting to socialize like that.
Small talk is the worst. I use it to break the ice, but it’s irritating when it’s the only form of communication people use. Worse still are the people who use small talk to project their negativity and bitterness out into the world in superficial ways.
OMG. Thanks so much for the video. I was crying to my mum the other day telling her how much I'm scared of people thinking I am stupid and clueless for being so quiet at a social gathering. She said I just have to speak up more instead of just listening, which is not easy at all! Now I truly feel OK with myself now. I am proud to be an introvert!
N O O R I’m extrovert, I try to spend time with people but they think I’m weird. Because of that I’m lonely though I’m extrovert. I was so sad I thought I will sick depression, but in time I’m dealing with that, and being alone is not that bad. Don’t be sad :)
@@ellsb282 I think being an extrovert means that you can contact with anybody easily than introvert person could do, yes you can deal with that, and don't care if they feel that you're weird, take more time with yourself and take care of it, I wish for you all the best
I'm 50 & I approve as well! Think of all the introverts 30 yrs ago who did not have any social media to connect w/other introverts. I always felt very strange because of hearing all these same comments said to me my whole life. Now I am happy & comfortable.
My older sister always tells me to go out and hang out with people and I really don’t want to she always judges me and calls me a loner just for not wanting to hangout with random people
Excellent video. I've been an introvert my whole life but people confuse it for being shy all the time and seem baffled when they see me on stage speaking or leading a meeting in a boardroom of people. You are correct to distinguish between the two conflated terms. Some people do take it personally when introverts decline invitations when it really has nothing to do with them or the event... we just prefer our Me-time that much. I used to feel guilty about this for a long time and wonder why I feel unsociable sometimes.... but learned it's not a bad thing. Some people NEED to be out there all the time and prefer the hustle and bustle of people and events all the time to get the joyful bliss introverts get by being alone. To each their own.... but no one ever insults extroverts for their lifestyle. This is the reason why celebrities and actors can be in the lime light but still prefer to be alone when not working... they are not shy but introverts. Thanks for sharing this.
Thank you for this. All my life I’ve been asked “why are you so quiet” or “have you always been this quiet?” and I’ve never known how to answer and often was made to feel like there was something wrong with me because of it. Truth is I really do just like to spend time by myself even in a room full of people. I’ve never related to a video more 🙌💞
They kind of bullied me too, I don’t really think it’s bullying, I think when you really get bullied is worse so I don’t think I got bullied. They always gave me the blame with some things. I hated gym especially, because I didn’t have any friends to pass me the ball. They always asked me why I didn’t do anything with gym and are mad at me for doing nothing. Of course it’s my fault too, but they should think for a bit too. They always kept asking me why I was quiet and got mad at me for little things, when I start a conversation I am really good at making them mad. I’m scared to start conversation because it often ends with an fight, I don’t mind fighting with fists but I do with words, it never gets better and... I’m really bad with words too. I get a bit fast mad too, but when I get mad I’m holding it in more often and better now. First I was really good at controllong my anger, after that I just let myself get mad because I was tired.
Again an ARMY member I can relate to the gym situation. I’m not as athletic as everyone and have difficult hand eye coordination. I’ve always been bad at P.E and I have asthma. Nobody would want to pair up with me, and the teachers would always snicker at me. I would have to group with random people, and it kinda felt like they sympathised me, and I hated that glare and the way they tried to give me simple tasks and belittle me. Talking to me like a child. I knew they would mutter hateful words and that didn’t help. And I had a few people who got mad at me when I tried to start up a convo. And I wondered why they did that, they would try and drown me out or shut me up, or give me hateful stares, directly roll their eyes. Try and take people away from me. It would be hard to try and not cry sometimes.
J G, those girls are most likely headed for hard times unless they grow up in time. be proud of who you are and what type of person you are. the bully is the weaker one, you definitely are not. introverts rule doll.
Raymond Flores I have three people who agree with my comment while you have none. Also I’m not going to be friends with someone who called me a creep and wants to kidnap me. You just exposed yourself clown 🤡
Oh definitely an introverted gal. I'd say I'm shy as well, because I don't like participating as much since when I was little I was shamed for it or for being wrong and I don't enjoy being put on the spot it's so stressful for me.
I've been told that "you are shy" in front of many classmates. I was just enjoying conversation without speaking so much. What made me feel shy was that sentence, "you are shy."
It took me forever to accept myself as an introvert because society kept telling me that it was wrong. I have accepted my introversion and even like to educate people on introverts, but my goal now is to be an introvert who CAN still be a light to other people and function well in social situations.
i know plenty of introverted people, one of my best friends is introverted is a fun person to dive deep into conversation with. I, myself am a extrovert.
Thank-you so i'm not crazy, aloof and stuck up. i'm actually just at peace with myself. and i looove it. thank God i'm not the ONLY one and crazy thing is introverts are farrr less judgement of others and more understanding and open-minded to others. Very weird and a little unfair - but true!
Noman Rasheed People of poverty are raised next to chemical plants profound city pollution poor diet, don’t have the financial means to pay for quality skin care products or professionals. Also, these people are often working outside and getting skin damage. Also, lucky genetics
I'm so happy I came across your channel. I've been feeling very insecure about being an introvert (or ambivert with introvert functions) lately, because I've started studying in a different city and I've been meeting lots and lots of new people (so much small talk) and it's draining my energy and there are so few people I felt a real connection with. And I hate it when I feel like people think I'm boring because I don't always have a lot to say. But I'm trying to accept myself more as I am and I think your videos can be really helpful. Thank you so much for doing this ❤
Introvert here and I often feel bullied by a mostly extraverted society...there is a stigma, and a tyranny often, at least in my experience of people pushing me to be different as if my introverted nature was something wrong...it has been a life saver to find out through books mostly that there are many other souls who are built the same way and that is OK :-)
I'm really quiet at work because whenever I make a comment about anything or talk about anything I like etc, most people at work starting asking question after question after question. Not to have a conversation or to get to know me, but because they just want to irritate me and get a rise out of me. Those questions always seem to take the form of very subtle put downs or ways to somehow make you feel like you wish you had never opened your mouth. And the people asking them always do so with a little smirk. Tried reporting it as bullying but was told they are just being friendly...no, I know what friendly is like...these people are just being d*cks. Either that or my opinions are not politically correct/acceptable in the current climate and I get berated for having my own thoughts and not being brainwashed. Easier to just ignore everyone and stay silent. That's why I'm quiet. But then your boss marks you down in your annual review for not being an 'engaging and participating' team member in the office. People suck.
You work in the wrong crowd. Situations like that usually there is an Alpha Leader regardless of what their job title and usually inside they are WEAK. Which is why they have the tough outer shell. So take out the alpha leader (VERBALLY) or switch jobs but don't work anywhere unless you are respected.
Very well stated, Lana! I'm an introvert and have spent much of my life explaining there's nothing wrong. As I have gotten older, I have become more comfortable with who I am.
Your point #5 about how introverts are often overlooked is so true. This is the story of my life, but I've learned how to get others to see my work/value/contribution in a way that works for me. Thanks for this video Lana!
I showed one of your videos to one of my friends yesterday and she actually had tears in her eyes. She had been having such a rough time over the past few months and your video really helped her to connect with the sense of peace she wants to regain in her life. Thank you Lana!
#I don't know why everyone look me like I'm weird....because I m introvert..???? I hate when people ask me-Why are you so quiet??? It's realy rude...!!!
Jesus loves you all ❤️ John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he sent his one and only son that whoever shall believe in him shall not perish but have eternal life” Jesus loves you and he stands at the door of your life and knocks. Will you invite him in ? He loves you so much! the first step is simply talking to him and believing in him
Thank you so much. I can relate to every single word in this video. I always wondered what to say to someone who asks me 'why are u so quiet?, 'Why r u so alone?', 'What is ur problem?' now i know the answer I am an introvert and am perfectly fine.
I’m 12 and I’m SOOOO quiet. But the question I hate the most is “why are you so quiet?” Idk... maybe I don’t have anything to talk about, and also I have anxiety so when someone asks me that and I say “idk what to talk about”... they say to me “just talk about anything”. Well because I have anxiety I have the thought of when I bring up a random topic that someone is gonna judge me. It’s an horrible feeling.
Every single point you said described exactly how I feel👀👏🏿 Thank you. It's nice to know that I am not the only one that feels like this. And I am proud to be introverted. I am proud to be me, because I know this is not a disadvantage but a benefit to put in perspective.
I needed to hear this. I honestly always felt out of place cuz I’m quiet I don’t have much to say, but this has changed my outlook. I am proud to be an introvert.
When someone says to you “Why are you quiet” I’m not convinced about the reply, “I enjoy the silence. I think it’s beautiful”. It means you’re justifying yourself. As a guy, I’d also get ripped on for it. Saying “Am I allowed to be?” might be more effective because it flips the justifying onto their social policing. A follow up response like “Do you usually try to police these social events?” may also work, if said tongue in cheek. But this might be difficult to say if you’re in fact shy!
I'm an introvert and kind of "weird" guy, I only had one girlfriend in my life. I feel most people don't understand me and are kind of "afraid" of me even though I'm kind to everyone.
Hi there, I am glad I found your channel. Your a very bright person, and your very beautiful. I have social issues as well, it has sort of affected me. Making me sad, and feeling like I can't do things because I'm also got learning issues, but I feel like I will get there, and so will you, and everyone in the comments. Believe in yourself, we are all good people.
I admire your personality alot, Im also an introvert and I like how you said you ponder about the universe in your quiet time, self company is the best company 🙂
I need so much alone time. Even introverts don't get my introversion. I'm that introverted. And I love it. Accepting it gave me peace. Fighting it will make you anxious and uncomfortable.
"I'm busy pondering the universe in my head" - a rare and attractive quality, that's exactly what I want my next girlfriend to say but also want to really discuss those contents
Love it. This is very much me. Draining to be around people, so much energy. And yet, sometimes people love me, I can be very charismatic in person. (Other times I am very anxious and that becomes off-putting) I do not understand the distinction between shyness snd introversion. Thanks for the book tip, I will look into it.
Yeah with certain people I'm so loud and play full but when I go out and arround people I hate to talk and just want to put my head phones in and be in my own mind.
I’m not shy, I just don’t want to talk all the time for no reason.
Spirit Same. I talk when I want to, and don't when I don't want to.
I’ve never related so much to a comment before
you are my idol sis
You took the words right out of my mouth I never knew what to say when people would ask why don’t you talk? Thanks Spirit
facts
I cringe when the first words someone says to me is "why are you so quiet?" 🙄
It's always followed by "Say something"
It means why doesn't you pay attention...
Just say "why are you so loud?"
quite person always good , humble & they don't argue with other person, so that's why i like quite people, and i m also a quiet too😘
Especially when you're black and people expect you to be loud and talkative.
"why are you so quiet?"
I don't know? maybe because i don't know you and doesn't know what to talk about? what do you expect me to say? human body is made of 70% water?
True
mood
*THE MITOCHONDRION IS THE POWERHOUSE OF THE CELL*
TheXplosifBrosif Mitochondria is plural. Singular is mitochondrion
@@AA-pv6mi fixed it!👍
I hate small talk.
I’d pay extra for a silent hair cut.
Will Alexander oh god how much I relate to this 😂
That's me completely! 😀
This is one of the many reasons I let my hair grow out lmfao
Will Alexander i get silent haircut all the time
Mainly because they are more interested in talking to the person next to me. Good for me
Top10 Nation Of course it’s easy to say hi. But maintaining a conversation with a stranger is difficult and stressful for some of us. Plus it serves no real purpose, and yet it’s socially expected. Social anxiety is a crippling condition to have, but mocking people only makes it worse.
I am really comfortable with quietness and literally no one in my life understands.
same
Sameee
Mark Hall
Lmao bruv. You just spoke some facts there.
i feel like im being annoying and that im being a nuisance around others if i talk too much
So true
TH-cam knows I'm an introvert and recommended me this video. 🤔
*_The algorithm knows_*
Yup 👏🏾
Same here
Same
Same
im shy and sometimes it gets mistaken for being rude which sucks
My boyfriends mother didn't like me at first and was very judgemental of me (she now is close with me and loves me), all because I was quiet and didn't talk much and she thought it was rude and made her feel unwelcome.
I just have a hard time talking to new people and need to know them before I'm comfortable before making small talk.
isabellaedits; omg!!! Saaaame ! Finally someone gets it 😩😭😭
Hi
@Laura 7777 hi
@Laura 7777 yes. same is true for me. also, i don't have a typical introverted demeanor/ manner of speaking etc. so the misunderstandings are always there, which is not only annoying but also sad, as they not only put labels like awkward, but also arrogant on you. Aargh.
I’m an introvert with social anxiety, but I hate when people label me as “shy”
Doesn't social anxiety make you shy?
NN // that’s different but okay
@@Lunastellacos How?
NN // look it up
@@Lunastellacos So I'm right then, got it.
“No don’t ask her, she doesn’t speak.” That’s because you don’t give me a chance. You talk over me every time I say anything so, why should I bother wasting my breath on someone who doesn’t care to listen?
samee
Talk to the trees. They always listen and never judge. :)
True, hate my sister
"why are you so quiet? are you mad?"
No I'm not. I'm actually in a fine condition just minding my own business until you asked and assumed things about me and now I'm mad. Thanks for ruining my vibe.
Now, extroverts become introverts too due to social distancing. So sad.
@@seriouslydude8078 I don't think that's how that works. I'm pretty sure without social media they would suffer.
So damn true
Small talk prevents honest conversation. I hate it. I’d have silence over small talk any-day
I used to think the same way, but recently I learned how important small talk is. Small talk builds a relationship. You get to know people and that is what leads to deep and honest conversations
No dude, you're being pretentious and you probably think you're more unique and deep than you really are (common among immature introverts). You cannot delve into meaningful topics if you've just met someone. Small talk is a great way to feel someone out and to decide if this person is worth investing time and energy into. Unless you just go around taking about the secrets of the universe with everyone you meet? But then if you did that you really wouldn't be introverts would you.
Small talk can lead to honest, deep conversations down the road.
This mentality confuses me so much.... like do you just walk up to people and start talking about the heat death of the universe? I'm
Small talk is actually good. I usually don’t initiate it but it gives u a rough picture of who someone else is.
"My shell is a beautiful place and that's where I'd rather be" :)
❤️
Ditto!😀 I draw strength and comfort from my shell. It's a beautiful thing.
Deeper feels 💗 🌟 🙏
ndjm00-If I had fifty cents for every time a fuckwit teacher lectured me about being in/retreating into my “shell”, I’d retire.
❤️
People feel a necessity to fill silence. They struggle with being comfortable with being uncomfortable. Though silence is sometimes much more powerful than words.
The last sentence is cringe. Silence isn’t more powerful than words if you just met someone. The only time that’s true is if you’re comforting someone. Otherwise you are just a brick wall that people are taking to
@@marie-nm9jo oh my god, someone finally said it! THANKS! i hate it when people say that or "silence is gold" -- yes, it might be if you're having a moment with someone, watching the stars. obvi. but introverts sometimes just sit in a room w/ you, staring at you and you're like "shit, what do you want me to do, juggle? why did you wanna hang if you're not keeping up the conversation i keep starting??"
@@marie-nm9jo ofc silence is powerful when you are with someone you like 🙄
@@marie-nm9jo he/she didnt say it was when you meet someone for the first time. Duh
THANK YOU I LOVE SILENCE
This basically explained my whole existance.
You are not alone!!
Existence*
I love u 😍❤❤
I’m an introvert. I spend a lot of time alone. When I’m around people, I don’t speak much but will when I have to.
One of the things that gets to me is when I do decide to go out or hang out with people and someone notices I’m not speaking much, and they make a comment. Then all eyes are me and it makes me feel awkward.
Well credit to you because I not gonna be in a group unless it’s with 1 or two people that I relate to
Kimberley gorman same here😅😅😅😅😅
gosh same and i hate when it happens
I have so many deep thoughts that I would like to share with the world....but I'm a very quiet person.....so I don't.
ManufacturedReality same
So I am but I speak a lot ^^^^ :))
I can relate
You'd be wise to voice them to some people. Perhaps these thoughts aren't that deep and you're just suffering from pluralistic ignorance.
@@TheTheode Perhaps you are right.
I am introvert and I really enjoy when people talk i like to listen more
Riri Graini same
Me too, listening is easy and we can absorb information...
Same with me
me too!!!! i absolutely love listening to people
Being a quiet this what I am passionate about 💚❤️💜
I'm an introvert. I love being introvert. It gives me peace.
So much peace !!! i love it.
Thank you Jam, very cool!
Jam Gail A Filipina introvert?
taoist40 yes
Preach sistah
my mom told me if i couldn’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all, people always wonder why i’m so quiet with them??
❤❤
Your mom wasn't saying anything while being cornered by alcohol aggression. I'm glad she found happyness and freedom after someone pulled her out of that corner. Hopefully she is recovered because sometimes the abused become the abusers. Wish her the best ♥
That’s actually bad for introverts because that is what other people expect, if you don’t speak it means you think bad things about the situation or people that is why they are suspicious of quiet people. The truth is that sometimes I am just too overwhelmed, tired or I just don’t feel like speaking up and definitely it DOESN’T mean I am thinking bad things then.
i’m honestly not a quiet person but i’ve given up on ppl bc they’re FAAAAAKE
Not a good feeling huh!!
I'm not fake Nicki........i really do want to marry you 😁😁
@@shaunprice200 shut up
yeah the friend i trusted most was always toxic to me and manipulated me into thinking that i was the bad person and they were the good person, i always felt like i talked way too much so im insecure about talking because of my old "friend" who told me that i was an alien and that i don't deserve to be human
@@name-eo1lv 🤐
“I’m fine, why are you so talkative?” 😎
😂 that’s awesome😂
Raymond Flores hey I like the sound of that, can I?
Um, because she is making a video and is not shy.
Chickedee Dee i guess she/he’s a quoting her
Idk why she said don't say thatm I'll definitely say this some day! :DD
💛😊
a part of my soul dies everytime someone mentions the weather first thing in the morning
Lol
I know! I wish people would stop commenting on the sun and just hiss at it like a damn adult.
Every single day of my life my roommate says, "Wow. It's a beautiful day." We live in LA. It's always beautiful, drives me nuts
That's what I always do when I don't know what else to talk about 😂
Nvr gets old 😂😂
Gonna send this to teachers when they say “you should talk more”
amber omg yes
I had this at school too. It is very insensitive especially coming from a teacher.
i had a professor in college who straight up asked me out of nowhere if i was an introvert. i was taken back that i didn't say anything. yes, i am an introvert but the way she did it was like an attack on who i was.
I'm a hardcore introvert but school is not a place where I stay quiet I need them grades it's the students I avoid
Yesssss
"why are you so quiet"
"well you are not a great talker"
Me:"I may not be a great talker but that's because I am a great thinker, unlike others who talk a lot yet think very little."
And that's how I reply when asked the irritating question.
That's wat I think to myself..but never say it aloud to them...
People who are extraverted talk a lot but say little. People who are introverted talk little but say a lot!
Why can't you be both
I always wanted to be a quiet person.
I'm not quite I just like listening more than talking..🙄
so this basically means that u are quiet
Be quick to listen and slow to speak
I love your shaking ponytail.
Thanks
I thought it was her cat tail 🤣😂
Ok.
Ohh lol I noticed it only after reading this comment 😁
Looks like a feathers, so pretty
I used to feel lonely when I was younger, then somehow I learned to transform my loneliness into solitude. Now I'm addicted to it, I'm happier and more creative when I'm alone. Many people think introvertedness is a curse but It can be an absolute bliss depending on your state of mind. Great video BTW.
I can definitely relate to this. Thank you!
Sooo much this! I am a 47yo ISFJ and I have only in the last 4 years or so really found the true bliss in being alone. My whole life I have always kinda felt I was missing out on something that extroverts inherently got to enjoy, only now do I realize they will never know the tranquility found in being at complete peace within yourself. ♡
"Loneliness is dangerous. It’s addicting. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don’t wanna deal with people."
Exactly. Same feeling.
@@infpmadness I'm an ISFJ too😊😊 with an 82% of introversion
ambivert here … I don't mind socializing but it does drain me and I need alone time to recoup :)
Same lol
Me too!
Me 2
I find I get energy from "good" social interaction (like when it goes the way I wanted it to or is meaningful in some way) but if it goes wrong I want to crawl in a hole and die.
Me too school is so exhausting for me because of it I always have a head ache by the end of the day
When I was a kid, I always used to get asked why I was so quiet, and I was made to feel like it was a really bad thing. However, when I got older and felt a little more comfortable talking and speaking up more, people would literally tell me to 'shut up'.
"Why are you so quiet? Are you ok?"
"Yeah, I'm just tired."
Wow, if I had a dollar for every time....
Be a gosh-darn millionaire!
“Being alone doesn’t mean being lonely “.
And "It's better to be alone, than feeling lonely in a group of people." or something like that
@@svetlana7579 Exactly
Tyler perry
Don't you hate it when people tell you to "speak up?"
Almost as much as i hate struggling to hear what someone is saying 🙃
@@icepincess yeah same
Just ask yourself what pickle riiiick would do... you wil be fine
@@ferdoeric596 No, this is Pickle Patrick
Yep in school all the time gah damn I wish I had a time machine to go back & fuck those bitches up
Growing up I use to think I was the only introvert that existed. I was always, the quiet one while everyone else was totally the opposite. So glad to know there are so many other people that are introverts. I use to feel bad about being an introvert and wish I could be that extrovert. I've realized over the years that I am perfectly fine how I am!
❤❤
Woow. A lot of people around me are introvert. I am extrovert. Sometimes I want more extrovert, really a lot of people introduce themselves as introvert and they are. I need people who are open and so on
Me too
I'm an introvert person.l love how deep introverts are.that's what satisfies me!
I actually think introverts are extremely intelligent also due to the amount of processing they continuously do in their mind. Understanding the physics of life.
"Hanging out with people is exhausting after a while." Oh yes, I get moody as well and angry holy crap. I gotta recharge😂
Carla Almonte omg same hahaha
Haha gotta recharge😅
same yaar..... it is exhausting
Me too 🙌
Imagine working in a nursing home and only getting about 5 hours a sleep on top of that. Suuuuuuccccckkkkks with your recharge
I’m introverted, shy and don’t know who I am
Not to be rude but shy is different from introversion, 2 whole different things. Also the last line of u don't know who you are seems like social anxiety to me.
You'll figure it out. Bits and pieces of yourself will start to become apparent. It just takes time.
babie ! You can be both
Kylo Ren That was me a couple years ago. You find who you are with experience. Others learn faster than others... I thought I’d be shy forever and I had little self identity. Of course I was young then. I’m only 21 now and I’m still learning. Good luck. It gets better with time and self reflection.
I have never related more to a comment
people think I'm rude or that I think I'm better than them allll the time. I just want to mind my own business and most people just don't understand
Isabella exactly
Meeee tooo! For some reason people don’t understand others that just like to mind their business. They think I’m stuck up cause I don’t like to small talk.
I once met a girl who didn't understand why I don't talk much. I tried explaining to her that I'm an Introvert and she got VERY rude. Asked for my full name for whatever reason and thought I was lying.
literally me everyday at school
dianameless
That girl is a word that I don’t want to use in this peaceful and understanding comment section 😂.
Isn’t it crazy how certain people are volatile when they don’t understand other people who have qualities that differ from their own? Really, what I think it was is that girl got hostile because she took your not wanting to talk much personally. As if your silence was a reflection of her. Most likely she has an insecurity (which she probably unconsciously feels makes her unworthy to talk to) within her that she probably felt was validated by you being withdrawn it that moment.
I'm an introvert, to the point where talking itself is draining for me. My best friend is an extrovert and although I love her to pieces, I secretly wish she wouldn't ring me everyday and then when I pick up ask if I'm okay because I sound down... I probably sound 'down' because I've been enjoying my own silence for a while and don't match her energy. That being said, we get on really well and although yes, I get the introvert hangover after spending more than an hour with her, I also get a lot out of our time together too.
I hate phone calls & small talks. Only exceptions are very very close people, which is below 5 in count.
My second day of college and it’s just too much small talks and social stuff, I want to make friends but I get drained out so easily and cannot carry on a normal convo :((
Hey I've been in college for almost a month now and I made no friends yet probably because I'm an introvert. :(
Harry Gerry yes exactly, I am the same xxx
Juliet A. Loft G. Im probably not going to make friends either but we should just focus on our study’s and not make having friends our priority, eventually I am sure the time will come when you meet someone amazing xx
same...
Oh, girl same. But I’n not going to college now, middle school, I know I am really young I am 12. I follow my friend and her group around and I am kind of friends with them but now I think they hate me. There is also a person from my old school in there, he didn’t really hate me, he was funny and I liked him but now he hates me. I have no idea what happened and why they are acting like that, maybe it’s something I did. They keep asking me if I’m sad and why I’m quiet and it’s really annoying. I made -2 friends but I have a chance to make +3, my old friend has anither group of friends, I follow her around because I have no idea what to do and I hate doing that.
I am cringe too sometimes when I make jokes, sometimes I realise it and I think why did I say that? Sometimes I don’t and I hate I can’t realise it. So I might not be really fun to talk with, I am scared to start conversations, but not scared to talk when the conversation already started, is that weird? When I meet new people I have no idea what to talk about, only when we are closer I am very loud sometimes, and I talk when I want to, I am a bit shy. With new friends and new people I am really boring, so they often don’t become real friends.
I don't know why im watching this w/ teary eyes. I always thought there's something wrong w/ me. I hope someone understands my personality type more than myself. :(
Lana's tone vibrates with your heart. She told your unconscious what it knows about you and being patient. So to say Lana opened a window for your unconscious. amasing isn't it.
I honestly thought that i have a problem, because when i get tired after a 3 hour hangout w my friends,i get physically n mentally tired that caused me to become easilly irritable or just 'not in mood' . turns out, im an introvert? holy
I need u am single❤❤
Me too. Like I love my friends but sht like this happens to me. I don't wanna get misjudged but I think we really cannot do anything about that. It sucks so bad
I'm an Introvert.
Extroverts are always trying to change me and i have changed but always go back to being my true self. An introvert.
Thank you for all your videos. You are brave.
Peace Love & Prosperity to You.
I hated it at school and university when the teacher or tutor kept saying “I want to know what you think. You’re always so quiet”
Me too, I get it all the time
If men or women talk way to much and I cannot get but three words in and they keep talking, I have tension and feel like I'm undervalued. Then I get tired and withdrawn inside.
Ghad i so feel you
sameeee
Absolute pet peeve of mine! I am, by no means, an introvert, but I get so drained by someone who incessantly talks AT me and doesn’t let me speak without interrupting.
How have these people never noticed how rude they are?!
And it's so embarrassing too!! Especially when you're in a group conversation and you make the effort to engage yourself into the conversation but some people just interrupt you and talk over you to say their thing. So rude. I usually give up and stop talking because it's way too exhausting to socialize like that.
@Locust Hypnosis same here
I'm an introvert so I started talking to a camera instead of people
I love watching your videos, love from India 🇮🇳
Small talk is the worst. I use it to break the ice, but it’s irritating when it’s the only form of communication people use. Worse still are the people who use small talk to project their negativity and bitterness out into the world in superficial ways.
OMG. Thanks so much for the video. I was crying to my mum the other day telling her how much I'm scared of people thinking I am stupid and clueless for being so quiet at a social gathering. She said I just have to speak up more instead of just listening, which is not easy at all! Now I truly feel OK with myself now. I am proud to be an introvert!
Here is a conversation starter
"Mitochondria is the power house of cell"
Are these videos popping up to all the introverts or is it just me
Everyone who has watched a TH-cam video on introversion, maybe?
Me too
Same
they're coming for us
Yep me too
I'm An Introvert, quiet and too much I like to be alone most of the time..
N O O R I’m extrovert, I try to spend time with people but they think I’m weird. Because of that I’m lonely though I’m extrovert. I was so sad I thought I will sick depression, but in time I’m dealing with that, and being alone is not that bad. Don’t be sad :)
@@ellsb282 I think being an extrovert means that you can contact with anybody easily than introvert person could do, yes you can deal with that, and don't care if they feel that you're weird, take more time with yourself and take care of it, I wish for you all the best
It’s especially hard being the quiet one in a Hispanic family :/ it makes me feel out of place
Same but in a Portuguese family.
Everyone: bla bla bla bla bla...
Me: 😐
@@DarknessBrothersPT Eu sou portuguese tb hahaha, i agreee ahhh i felt that
In an Arab family as well. 🤦🏻♀️
Same bro especially at the parties man
As a 45 year old introvert, I seriously approve of this message!
I'm 50 & I approve as well! Think of all the introverts 30 yrs ago who did not have any social media to connect w/other introverts. I always felt very strange because of hearing all these same comments said to me my whole life. Now I am happy & comfortable.
My older sister always tells me to go out and hang out with people and I really don’t want to she always judges me and calls me a loner just for not wanting to hangout with random people
Same thing with my sister :( it hurts me when she says that I don't know how to speak to other people, and I do know but I prefer to stay quite.
Excellent video. I've been an introvert my whole life but people confuse it for being shy all the time and seem baffled when they see me on stage speaking or leading a meeting in a boardroom of people. You are correct to distinguish between the two conflated terms. Some people do take it personally when introverts decline invitations when it really has nothing to do with them or the event... we just prefer our Me-time that much. I used to feel guilty about this for a long time and wonder why I feel unsociable sometimes.... but learned it's not a bad thing. Some people NEED to be out there all the time and prefer the hustle and bustle of people and events all the time to get the joyful bliss introverts get by being alone. To each their own.... but no one ever insults extroverts for their lifestyle.
This is the reason why celebrities and actors can be in the lime light but still prefer to be alone when not working... they are not shy but introverts. Thanks for sharing this.
Well said! Thank you for watching.
And thank you Lana, for the effort you invest in your subscribers comments.
I'm quiet because I know the TRUTH 🤫
Shy does not equal introvert. Insightful! I like that one.
Good to hear: 'being alone is not means being lonely'.
Thank you for this. All my life I’ve been asked “why are you so quiet” or “have you always been this quiet?” and I’ve never known how to answer and often was made to feel like there was something wrong with me because of it. Truth is I really do just like to spend time by myself even in a room full of people. I’ve never related to a video more 🙌💞
Hi
Ghh I remember when these girls used to BULLY me for being so quiet
They kind of bullied me too, I don’t really think it’s bullying, I think when you really get bullied is worse so I don’t think I got bullied. They always gave me the blame with some things. I hated gym especially, because I didn’t have any friends to pass me the ball. They always asked me why I didn’t do anything with gym and are mad at me for doing nothing. Of course it’s my fault too, but they should think for a bit too. They always kept asking me why I was quiet and got mad at me for little things, when I start a conversation I am really good at making them mad. I’m scared to start conversation because it often ends with an fight, I don’t mind fighting with fists but I do with words, it never gets better and... I’m really bad with words too. I get a bit fast mad too, but when I get mad I’m holding it in more often and better now. First I was really good at controllong my anger, after that I just let myself get mad because I was tired.
@@gardenfalls Wow, thanks for opening up!
In my experience, these 2 girls would taunt me and say some weird (sometimes messed up) stuff towards me
Again an ARMY member
I can relate to the gym situation. I’m not as athletic as everyone and have difficult hand eye coordination. I’ve always been bad at P.E and I have asthma.
Nobody would want to pair up with me, and the teachers would always snicker at me.
I would have to group with random people, and it kinda felt like they sympathised me, and I hated that glare and the way they tried to give me simple tasks and belittle me. Talking to me like a child. I knew they would mutter hateful words and that didn’t help.
And I had a few people who got mad at me when I tried to start up a convo. And I wondered why they did that, they would try and drown me out or shut me up, or give me hateful stares, directly roll their eyes.
Try and take people away from me. It would be hard to try and not cry sometimes.
J G, those girls are most likely headed for hard times unless they grow up in time. be proud of who you are and what type of person you are. the bully is the weaker one, you definitely are not. introverts rule doll.
I’m an introvert and I related to everything you said.
Same! It sucks that she’s not within driving distance, I would love to be friends with her.
@@Ash_Queen16 yeah :(
Raymond Flores How was that creepy lmao don’t come to conclusions to things that aren’t there
Raymond Flores I have three people who agree with my comment while you have none. Also I’m not going to be friends with someone who called me a creep and wants to kidnap me. You just exposed yourself clown 🤡
Oh definitely an introverted gal. I'd say I'm shy as well, because I don't like participating as much since when I was little I was shamed for it or for being wrong and I don't enjoy being put on the spot it's so stressful for me.
I've been told that "you are shy" in front of many classmates.
I was just enjoying conversation without speaking so much.
What made me feel shy was that sentence, "you are shy."
It took me forever to accept myself as an introvert because society kept telling me that it was wrong. I have accepted my introversion and even like to educate people on introverts, but my goal now is to be an introvert who CAN still be a light to other people and function well in social situations.
i know plenty of introverted people, one of my best friends is introverted is a fun person to dive deep into conversation with. I, myself am a extrovert.
That what's the nature's rule
Thank-you so i'm not crazy, aloof and stuck up. i'm actually just at peace with myself. and i looove it. thank God i'm not the ONLY one and crazy thing is introverts are farrr less judgement of others and more understanding and open-minded to others. Very weird and a little unfair - but true!
😍😍❤❤❤
Your skin is flawless. Can you please share your skincare routine?
Noman Rasheed get born rich and with the right genes. You’re welcome
@@feels6233 what richness has to do with the skin?
Noman Rasheed good treatment
@@dianprasetyo104 got it. Thank you!
Noman Rasheed People of poverty are raised next to chemical plants profound city pollution poor diet, don’t have the financial means to pay for quality skin care products or professionals. Also, these people are often working outside and getting skin damage.
Also, lucky genetics
I'm so happy I came across your channel. I've been feeling very insecure about being an introvert (or ambivert with introvert functions) lately, because I've started studying in a different city and I've been meeting lots and lots of new people (so much small talk) and it's draining my energy and there are so few people I felt a real connection with. And I hate it when I feel like people think I'm boring because I don't always have a lot to say.
But I'm trying to accept myself more as I am and I think your videos can be really helpful. Thank you so much for doing this ❤
Introvert here and I often feel bullied by a mostly extraverted society...there is a stigma, and a tyranny often, at least in my experience of people pushing me to be different as if my introverted nature was something wrong...it has been a life saver to find out through books mostly that there are many other souls who are built the same way and that is OK :-)
I'm really quiet at work because whenever I make a comment about anything or talk about anything I like etc, most people at work starting asking question after question after question. Not to have a conversation or to get to know me, but because they just want to irritate me and get a rise out of me.
Those questions always seem to take the form of very subtle put downs or ways to somehow make you feel like you wish you had never opened your mouth. And the people asking them always do so with a little smirk.
Tried reporting it as bullying but was told they are just being friendly...no, I know what friendly is like...these people are just being d*cks.
Either that or my opinions are not politically correct/acceptable in the current climate and I get berated for having my own thoughts and not being brainwashed.
Easier to just ignore everyone and stay silent. That's why I'm quiet.
But then your boss marks you down in your annual review for not being an 'engaging and participating' team member in the office.
People suck.
Oh man. I understand that one!
You work in the wrong crowd. Situations like that usually there is an Alpha Leader regardless of what their job title and usually inside they are WEAK. Which is why they have the tough outer shell. So take out the alpha leader (VERBALLY) or switch jobs but don't work anywhere unless you are respected.
Very well stated, Lana! I'm an introvert and have spent much of my life explaining there's nothing wrong. As I have gotten older, I have become more comfortable with who I am.
I wish I could articulate why I’m an introvert as eloquently as you do. I’m speechless. I feel like you just described me.
Your point #5 about how introverts are often overlooked is so true. This is the story of my life, but I've learned how to get others to see my work/value/contribution in a way that works for me. Thanks for this video Lana!
I showed one of your videos to one of my friends yesterday and she actually had tears in her eyes. She had been having such a rough time over the past few months and your video really helped her to connect with the sense of peace she wants to regain in her life. Thank you Lana!
#I don't know why everyone look me like I'm weird....because I m introvert..????
I hate when people ask me-Why are you so quiet???
It's realy rude...!!!
Same
Exactly
Don't considered others words..cas you know who u are
Jesus loves you all ❤️ John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he sent his one and only son that whoever shall believe in him shall not perish but have eternal life”
Jesus loves you and he stands at the door of your life and knocks. Will you invite him in ? He loves you so much! the first step is simply talking to him and believing in him
Non-shy introvert. Understanding that they are different is really helpful. Read about it when I was 55.
Thank you so much.
I can relate to every single word in this video.
I always wondered what to say to someone who asks me 'why are u so quiet?, 'Why r u so alone?', 'What is ur problem?' now i know the answer
I am an introvert and am perfectly fine.
I am an extrovert, but I’d love to try and understand introverts. Just because we’re different, doesn’t mean it’s bad. 💕
I’m 12 and I’m SOOOO quiet. But the question I hate the most is “why are you so quiet?” Idk... maybe I don’t have anything to talk about, and also I have anxiety so when someone asks me that and I say “idk what to talk about”... they say to me “just talk about anything”.
Well because I have anxiety I have the thought of when I bring up a random topic that someone is gonna judge me. It’s an horrible feeling.
I am also 12 and my classmates always asks me this questions I thought I am the only one who is 12 but quite
Finally i found a channel and a person who understands me
I’m sooo happy to finally be able to relate to someone💕
Omgg I can’t believe you hearted my comment❤️
i love when you can b quiet wit sumone. then you know for sure it is a honest true person.
i get this all the time i dont like to talk to people, im not shy, i know how to be social outside i just dont want to be.
Every single point you said described exactly how I feel👀👏🏿 Thank you. It's nice to know that I am not the only one that feels like this. And I am proud to be introverted. I am proud to be me, because I know this is not a disadvantage but a benefit to put in perspective.
I needed to hear this. I honestly always felt out of place cuz I’m quiet I don’t have much to say, but this has changed my outlook. I am proud to be an introvert.
When someone says to you “Why are you quiet” I’m not convinced about the reply, “I enjoy the silence. I think it’s beautiful”. It means you’re justifying yourself. As a guy, I’d also get ripped on for it. Saying “Am I allowed to be?” might be more effective because it flips the justifying onto their social policing. A follow up response like “Do you usually try to police these social events?” may also work, if said tongue in cheek. But this might be difficult to say if you’re in fact shy!
love this!
Can’t imagine how hard it is as a guy because they also have to deal with not being ridiculed for being too feminine or something like that.
I'm an introvert and kind of "weird" guy, I only had one girlfriend in my life. I feel most people don't understand me and are kind of "afraid" of me even though I'm kind to everyone.
Hi there, I am glad I found your channel. Your a very bright person, and your very beautiful. I have social issues as well, it has sort of affected me. Making me sad, and feeling like I can't do things because I'm also got learning issues, but I feel like I will get there, and so will you, and everyone in the comments. Believe in yourself, we are all good people.
100% relatable. People just don’t get me and think I’m weird.
Hear, hear! Well said and explained. More true words have rarely been spoken. Keep up your excellent videos Lana!
Thank you so much Alexander!
I admire your personality alot, Im also an introvert and I like how you said you ponder about the universe in your quiet time, self company is the best company 🙂
the real world,is inside of my head..here is where I live
I need so much alone time. Even introverts don't get my introversion. I'm that introverted. And I love it. Accepting it gave me peace. Fighting it will make you anxious and uncomfortable.
I love this. It is so frustrating to be labeled as shy for being quiet. And the worst insult is when people try to “bring me out of my shell.”
"I'm busy pondering the universe in my head" - a rare and attractive quality, that's exactly what I want my next girlfriend to say but also want to really discuss those contents
I RELATED WITH ALMOST EVERYTHING YOU SAID. thank you for this video.
Love it. This is very much me. Draining to be around people, so much energy. And yet, sometimes people love me, I can be very charismatic in person. (Other times I am very anxious and that becomes off-putting)
I do not understand the distinction between shyness snd introversion.
Thanks for the book tip, I will look into it.
Yeah with certain people I'm so loud and play full but when I go out and arround people I hate to talk and just want to put my head phones in and be in my own mind.
“My shell is a very beautiful place”, I like that expression.