4 Simple Habits That Make Parenting a Toddler MUCH Easier
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 ม.ค. 2024
- These are my 4 best tips for any parent raising a toddler and trying to manage all of the challenges that come with it 😀.
Your toddler's brain is developing at an incredible rate. They're experiencing lots of new emotions, and learning how to deal with these big feelings is as challenging for them as it is for you. The good news is, this stage of development doesn't last forever. And there are things you can do to make it easier.
These tips will help you manage challenging toddler behaviour (including reducing the frequency of tantrums), and also help make life with a toddler in the house a little less stressful.
As always, I hope you find this video helpful!
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Which habit are you going to start using? I have to improve our yes space as my toddler has just worked out how to crawl up the stairs. But I so don't want to put up the baby gates! I am super clumsy and fall through them all the time😂
Don't forget to get your free Communication Milestones Chart here: brightestbeginning.com/communicationmilestoneschart/
I'm definitely doing the toy rotation. Our son has SO MANY TOYS! It'll be nice to weed out the ones he actually enjoys, are no longer age appropriate, and reduce the mess as well as not overstimulating him.
When my son was an early toddler we secured all kitchen cupboards but one! That was his cupboard and it was filled with all safe kitchen equipment. So he had the freedom to take out potato masher, pastry brush, tupperware and all sorts. His little yes space with mummy and daddies stuff he could play with freely and safely! 😁
My partner did this and it’s pretty rad…we put fidget spinners on the cabinet door to keep him interested 🫡😎
Ours was always the tupperware cabinet lol
Ooh I love that idea!
Our little one loves the Tupperware cupboard😂
Love the fidget spinner idea too!
I was frustrated telling my little to stop opening the cabinet doors. I started teaching her 'close the door' instead, and it helped tremendously. Now, she will freely go around and close doors she sees open. I'm hoping to teacher he to put her toys in the box next
That's so good! Love this so much! My 1 year old also loves shutting all our cupboard doors!
Thank you for this. It helps so much
I am 38 weeks pregnant now haha! Bubba isn't here yet but woah I feel like I have just discovered a treasure chest with your channel! So much to learn as a FTM thank you for your contributions!!
Congratulations!! Thank you so much for the kind words 😊. I'm glad you're finding it helpful!
I’ve been watching this channel since I was pregnant! She’s 13 months now and this channel is amazing! Congrats 🎊🎉 everything is going to be just fine ❤
Our son is 18 months old and her videos have helped with much! I'm so happy you found her!
Thank you! I have a 6 year old son and I feel I failed him in many ways due to not understanding the simple basics your videos explain. We are going to therapist to get him help and on track in a few ways.Transitions, impulse control, and emotional direction are the main things we're diving into.
However, now I have my 8 month old baby girl, and it's saved me having you with this baby.
My son is a great kid, I just feel I could have been way better parent wise for him with this knowledge, so thank you.
Here is to my 2nd! Mommas got more in her tool box now🎉
We do the best we can with the information we have. ❤️
The best parents are the ones who worry and criticize their own parenting - most of the time, these parents are doing way better of a job than they think. I'm sure you're in that category :)
Ditto
I'm a Nana, your videos are very helpful. Thank you for all do. Your videos have helped me so much, since my youngest is 34 years old. Thank you again.
Everything in this video is gold. I wasn't sure how to warn my toddler we're changing activities, so I just started saying "Okay one more ____ and then we're taking a bath." Where one more is honestly super vague it just means soon. But it helped drastically. I love the five minute timer idea, he's probably ready for that method now. We've been using the other points in the video, and it's amazing how obedient my toddler is when I just tell him behaviors I want rather than don't want. He has moods of boundary testing, but he at least knows what I want him to do lol.
I use almost all of these techniques when teaching middle and high school, lol! 😂
Such a helpful video. Thank you so much Emma. You have taught me a lot. Thank you so much for responding to each and every query that I raise. Thank you. Loved the content of this video. I will try to inculcate this on my baby boy.
I like how your content is aging with my baby! You helped me a lot during my baby's first 12 months and still helping me now!
Hopefully these videos keep helping.
Thank you as always for your advice Emma
You're so welcome!
When mom was running her daycare, she had the ‘Clean Up’ song. When it was getting towards time to start a new activity (get ready for lunch, go outside, ‘school work’) she would say “Ok, let’s do the Clean Up song.” They’d sing through once while mom would put one or two things away, and then the kids would get engaged and start picking up themselves.😊
That's so cool! When I tell my toddler "a few more minutes " he starts singing a cleanup song by himself 😂 sounds like that's a great transition for them
Great video! When it comes to yes space, I think it’s important to have a shift in perspective and realize that for some time now you need to give up on things for the sake of child’s safety and development. We got rid of a coffee table for instance. And I rearranged kitchen drawers so I don’t have to worry that my 1.7 months old daughter is getting into trouble. She also likes dishwasher and I encouraged her in helping me emptying it (plates only, not sharp cutlery of course). By doing this she also lost interest in the drawer with plates very quickly 😂 It does take a lot of patience, but children really need our empathy more than anything. I don’t care about candle holder or picture frames really. I still have a nice and pleasant environment at home and it’s baby proof at the same time. I just told myself to take it easy and that it’s temporary :)
Exactly. It’s not forever and it honestly makes your day to day with your toddler easier.
Ive learned these lessons with my blood, sweat, and tears 😂😂 but can confirm they work!
Great advice as always. Always looking forward for your videos❤
Thanks so much!
You always provide such great information. Thank you
You are so welcome!
You are incredible Emma! You've given me some language to help communicate what I "felt" to be good parenting to my wife.
So glad I could help you explain how you both want to parent your little one.
The counting down really works and the warning ahead of time. I use those all the time and sometimes I am shocked how well they work.
I like that one too!
Thank you soooo much! This is exactly what I needed as we’re in this exact phase. She broke some of our child locks in the kitchen and now makes it a game opening drawers.
Glad it helped!
Perfect timing as my 19mo is becoming more aware of these changes and expressing her emotions!
Hopefully these help!
Emma can you do a video on how to train toddlers to hold your hand when out and about? My toddler refuses to hold my hand in the shops, runs away regularly and to avoid dangerous situations like in a car park we have to carry her inside but this causes tantrums and she kicks us and screams the place down.
Very timely advice, we are about to setup a spare lounge room fully for our 13month old. Thank you for the video.
Glad it was helpful!
The last example about going down the slide 5 more times I also find it helps when I say to my toddler that was so much fun it’s great coming to the park isn’t it did you enjoy yourself. We will come back to the park again soon. It’s time to do x y z now. Bye park! See you soon! She’s only 20 months old but seems stop a tantrum as it is starting to begin. Thought I would share the tip here as it is sort of linked and other parents might find it useful too. I love you channel Emma ❤
Thanks for sharing!!
Thank you for these videos. I’m a gen X grandma who is mostly responsible for my 3 y/o grandson. I know there are better ways to negotiate the toddler years than how I did with my kids. Do you have a video on a toddler being (frequently) demanding and getting upset for having to wait for any request?
The timer helps me so much when it's time to finish the bath. Thank you for all your tips! ❤
You are so welcome!
My parents used to give us time in relation to cartoons. I had no idea how long 1 minute was but absolutely could conceptualize, "We're leaving in an opening of Captain Planet".
Toddler stage is a crazy stage!!
It’s certainly a busy stage!
This is brilliant, Thank you so so much ❤
No problem 😊
Surprisingly, I used all of these already. 23 month old hit some development though - refuses absolutely anything I say, regardless of what it was. Even if it is a thing they love. It is a firey pit of hell on some days. These techniques have now a 35% chance of working when these had a 70% success before.
Really useful. Thank you 😊
Glad to hear that!
Good timing! Our 16 monther is starting to let her will be known - I can already see how the "do this" advice is so much more powerful than the "dont do that" one. Do you have any advice on how to get a partner on board with this advice? My partner has fallen into the habit where very often when I say something related to upbringing, I mean it in the worst possible way it could have been meant... Sometimes they even do the opposite of my suggestions simply because I cannot be right.
Also, our daugther is rapidly becoming bored with some of her 12-18 month toys, even when rotating. Do you have an 18m+ toy list we can start to look into?
I often talk to my spouse about the issue I would like to see changed at a calm time as a by the way interesting thing i heard/read about. I then ask their opinion on it and discuss it as theoretical. Often if they hear about it in a non-threatening way when it's not in the moment, they see your point better. I also needed to accept that they have their own parenting journey and we can't fix it for them. It's also part of our children's life journey to have that parent just the way they are. Though we can and should try to help them out, you don't have to make them parent just like you
Hi Emma Hubbard,
Long time viewer since you started the channel, love your videos!
I was just wondering if you could do a video or provide information about baby skipping the crawling stage and going straight to standing/walking? I was told it leads to develepmental issues later in life, but when looking into it myself it doesnt seem like there's much research or it's just a myth?
My baby is 6.5 months and not interested in crawling, he only wants to stand, he does air crawl though but he gets frustrated he can't move himself. He just wants to get moving like his big sister. I've been doing lots of tummy time and things to help him crawl like in your videos. What can I do to help him progress?
Hi Emma, I’m wondering if you are only treating children without health issues. If not, I’d love to see some videos targeted for special needs parents as well. Most videos I see online talk about the normal developmental milestones and issues, yet a video focusing on the adjusted milestones, advices for special needs parents etc. would be much appreciated. I’m sure the 1% (parents of children with disabilities or syndromes) would enjoy the visibility.
There are varied dedicated parenting channels depending on the disability, you just have to search for the disability along with "parenting"
@@Lizzifer7 I watch many. But almost none are as comprehensive and informative as Emma’s. If Emma has the experience, would love to hear them. She is a great story teller.
Babies/toddlers are members of the family and if you’re welcoming them in, you should be willing to make accommodations for little humans. And making the little changes to the environment and the way you interact, you’re creating a healthy environment for the toddler and for yourself.
100%! They are also joining a family system and can learn very quickly how to become a helpful part of it. My 2 year will run to grab a rag when something spills to clean up the mess. We all adjust to each other
If i suggested to my son to go down the slide five more times, at the fourth he would change the game and ask me to countdown his engagement in each other game in the park😂😂. He's done this several times since he learned to count from 1-20😂
Clever little one!😂
There's no video in the upper left corner at the end! Definitely need to watch it 😂
Thanx alot for these tips. I m helping my daughter with her 14 months old . I specially liked yes space idea.
My pleasure 😊
We went to the park when we were on a trip to visit family and I used that slide method. My husband was so surprised that our LO just willingly got up and walked to the car. He was 2 years and 2 months at the time.
Love this!! 😀. It's amazing what our little ones are capable of
How do you replace Don’t bite with to do action? Thank you
Teeth are for eating 😂
Yes, you can bite food! Here's a bread, cookie, pretzel
“No” works for my littles. You have to be firm and follow through when they don’t listen.
No one likes being spoken to in a negative structure.
“don’t this, not that”. It works sometimes but rarely.
Exactly!
@@EmmaHubbard
My mother talks like that to my dad.
“You’re doing it wrong”, while I’ve never heard her saying how she want the thing to be done.
People who use negative grammar structure are tiring to listen to.
Not to mention I often have no clue what they mean :)
@@valdius85working on my parenting has definitely helped my marriage as well. 😂😂
My one year old isn't interested in his toys! I do toy rotation but he's more interested in his books, activity table and exploring. Any tips?
I think the same principle of rotation applies to books, and maybe your activity table depending on how you have it set up. With exploring, maybe just start going to new spaces after they seem like they have “finished” exploring the place. (If you always go to the museum, for example, and they’ve seen everything and are too young to enjoy rotating exhibits, then try going to an art gallery or the library on the next outing, or something.)
It might be a season. Maybe put the toys away and on a few weeks bring a few out. My toddler has weeks where he plays non-stop and then weeks where he just rides his bike and looks at books a lot
I love those videos, but I am a little nervous about the communication aspect of it. Me and my husband don’t speak the same language (I speak French, he speaks English). Our little one is only 5 months, but is there any adjustments we would need to make to those indicators as he grew up to help him understand outside of “words”? We live in a French environment, but my husband he still learning, so the language difference is not really a choice…
Our daughter is 14months old now my husband is Argentinian and we live in Argentina but I’m only talking with her in Hungarian since she was 3 months old. I’m the only input and my parents through skpe 😅It’s amazing how she understands both languages. Don’t think that there should be a big difference. Good luck on the bilingual journey
@@pomberry3591 ah merci! Ça me rassure!
Spanish here, with a polish husband living in the UK.
I speak to my 8 months ols in spanish, my husband and his family in polish and we speak at home in english.
They told me we could expect some language delay due to TRIlinguism, but kids are sponges for languages, is the best gift you can give your little one ❤
We're bilingual as well and my son picked up the words in the language it was easier to pronounce first, and then said it in both languages as his speech got better
Had we an upper leave we would use that now we fix the whole flat
We have an entire basement dedicated to my kids to play safely. We make sure to keep other doors closed which we don’t want them accessing, that way they can move around the house without us parents getting frustrated. We don’t have any plants or other breakable items anywhere accessible to them. Learned from mistakes made with the first kid.
Sounds like you have a great setup!
I do like having some no items in their reach to teach them not to destroy everything in their path. 99% of my home where little fingers can reach is a yes zone, with those few exceptions. It's worked great (nothing dangerous, though. Just something they learn they shouldn't touch)
whatever works for ya, that's great.@@beans4853
How do you create a yes space with pets? My toddler chases my two large dogs & three cats
Still hoping for insight on this 😓
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Me and my husband are having a baby but he’s gonna be working every day so I’m gonna go spend time with my mom since I’ll be lonely
3:35 is that a removable shelf space? A little dangerous isn’t it?
It is, which is why we chose to show that as a behaviour where a parent might say “no!”, “don’t” or “stop” 🙂
@@EmmaHubbard 😅 oh!
“On the upper floor, it’s a different story.” bars
😂
I have a soon to be 13 year old, 11 year old and the 2 year old, creating a yes space is not something I can do right now.
By only teaching kids what they can do, you aren’t setting appropriate boundaries for them. Perhaps a better alternative would be: if they do something wrong, tell them but also reinforce that lesson with an explanation of what they should be doing instead. This better clarifies boundaries for children. Not sure if this was implied in the video. But if it was, it wasn’t clear
I think most people by default say what you shouldn't do. This advice helps you to reframe some of it in a positive way. I don't think anyone uses it all the time. Studies have also shown that kids hear the action you state, no matter if it is preceded by a dont, as a call to do that action. If you say no jumping, they will hear jump. If you say your feet should stay on the ground, you're more likely to get the outcome you want
Anyone have something that works for a toddler who still throws food? We have tried 1. saying no, 2. food is for eating, 3. if you don't want it, just leave it, 4. food is for our mouth or our plate, 5. and taking the plate away after second prompt and returning when she seems calmer. When she does eat, we praise but she'll still throw, sometimes as soon as we offer the praise. We've been doing this since she started solids 10 months ago, and there has been almost no progress.
My son used to do this and I realized that it was my reaction to him doing was what kept him going. Not sure if my advice will help, but in order for my son to stop I had to be stoic about him throwing food and let it happen. The cause and effect is a milestone that all babies reach. If he throws and you pick up, he thinks it’s a game. Definitely have him clean up after himself too. I wouldn’t pressure him to but have him try and teach him that he’s responsible for his own actions. My son is 5 now and we have a cleanup routine he follows.
When my youngest was just on solid foods a few months, he decided he could throw food (usually on the floor).
Without any reprimand, I'd take him out of the high chair, put him on the floor and say "pick it up", and wait till he did. He did this maybe half a dozen times, and got the same response each time. Pleasant tone of voice on my part, patience.
He didn't like the change to his game, but he didn't fuss. He just stopped throwing food and ate it instead.
@@gypsymiller3683I did this with mine as well :) also when she would dump out her water cup, I’d get her down and have her get a towel and clean up.
We actually only have a problem with our son throwing things on the floor: toys, his toothbrush etc. or hitting us, especially when we are changing him or he is upset, he just comes and hits us. But, he is never doing it at the kindergarten! So we are definitely doing smth wrong, i just don’t know what…😢
@@jemimah_ayua WE have done all that keep on doing, but no change. For time out he is too small, he is 21 months. And I also don't think it is in general a good measure at early age at least. He will just not stay anywhere, will run anyway.
@@jemimah_ayua he is a brilliant child, speaks in sentences in two different languages, sings and can already count, and behaves otherwise perfect, I don't think I will ever do that to him. That's not my parenting style.
The fact that he's doing it with you and not in kindergarten actually shows that he feels safe enough with you to show his frustration. You still need to teach him it's not okay, but it doesn't mean you're doing something wrong! It means you are a loving and secure place for him to show his true colors.
My 3 year old would reset the timer when I wasn't looking if I put it in his reach 😂
It needs to be within their eyes reach, not arms reach 😂😂😂
I do the timer. And 9/10 she respects the timer.
I'm a huge fan of the timer! Works really well for our kids too.
I never tried a timer per se, but when the alarm goes off that it's time for playgroup, he drops everything and goes to get his coat
What do you do if your kid just doesn't like toys? My daughter only likes everey day materials and books. The rest is totally not interesting for her!
Could you set out some pots and pans, large spoons, etc? Real things to explore that are safe? It might be her desire to imitate and to learn about the world of the people around her! Also, Emma has a video on how to get toddlers interested in playing by themselves:)
My daughter was like this for a few months but eventually grew out of it and starting playing with toys at around 18 months +
My little one prefers playing with real items he sees us using, so I swap out toys in his toy box with mixing bowls, measuring scoops, tea towels, and other "non toy" but still toddler safe items. They explore the world through play, and if they see you doing something, they will want to do the same thing.
yes we always give her something, she loves cooking at the moment :) and can also play alone :) @@SoZen08
removed daddy's record collection from the new baby room :)
The amount of time i say wall slowly and end up screaming st him by the pool but he still doesnt listen. I liie that hes so funny but man its tiring having a wild child
parents taking my toys away in a fixed schedule would destroy my trust in them and I would start hiding favorites or use things they don't rotate as toys.
It's hilarious that you think you'd have even noticed as a baby, nevertheless come up with an intricate plan to foil them 😂😂😂
@@strixt Oh well. Some babies get a crying fit for days if their favorite cuddle object isn't there. Don't tell me babies are stupid, just because you can't remember a time when you were not stupid.
@emilwandel Wow, your ego is really tied up in this, isn't it?
A) Taking away a *favorite cuddle item* is completely different from rotating *toys* in and out, especially if the rotation started early in your toy life.
B) You wouldn't have any idea that it was your parents taking the toys away, even if you realized the toys were gone. All you would know is that it wasn't there anymore.
C) I wasn't saying "babies are stupid," in fact, nowhere in my comment is it even implied that they are. What the implication was is that your plan is stupid.
Have a great day, super chief, and work on that self-esteem, yeah?
She's 14 months and won't stop throwing food on the floor. We are in feeding therapy. Not helping. So so so frustrated.
We have her bedroom as a Yes Space in the Montessori style and the living room is 80% there. The kitchen and dining room is completely off limits unless she is in her high chair.
Ive tried very hard to maintain a schedule.
She is really an amazing child and the only issue seems to be around food. We know she has a sensory issue and won't eat anything wet, soft, or pureed. This is ery challenging
I said to my 18 month old recently, i know, all you hear is no. Lets try some yes. So if he keeps going after thibgs he shouldn't, or doing things he shouldn't every no has a yes. No, don't bounce on the dog, yes bounce on the bouncy horse. No, don't throw the block. Yes throw the ball. And so on. And sometimes for really big items like a pen, something he loves to play with and I swear he gas a stash, i give him multiple yes options. No, Mommy's pen. Yes, your car, train, book, snack. Kind of like trading
Giving them a safe and suitable alternative is so powerful. Makes them feel like they have a little bit of control too!
Thanks so much for sharing!
That's really empowering for them! I also taught my now 2 year old that if he makes a mess he needs to clean it up. He can't just dump and go to the next thing. Makes him think twice before doing it again and he's learning on his own what not to do so I don't gave to say no. Instead I say "if you spill the cereal, you'll need to clean it up" and not "don't spill the cereal"
Stop doesn’t work with my new 1yr old. He’s smart, if you tell him no. He will stop and find something else to play with. The whole house is a yes Space but there are things we can’t move: so he knows not to play with certain things.
You need to be wealthy enough to afford a property with many rooms to have a 'yes space'