Worked in China for 2 years. One of my staff came up to me and said “boss you’ve been going to the gym for a while, but you’re still fat. Just give up and enjoy yourself”
True but like Jimmy said Chinese are less sensitive about people being overweight because that symbolise prosperities, as least that’s true in the past.
@@L3iglL By country I mean outside of the city and in certain states like Georgia, Texas, Alabama, etc. Basically everywhere in the south that's a while away from town.
I’m white but my adoptive father is a Taiwanese immigrant. He started dating my mom when I was 10 months old. My biological father died before I was born. When he and my mom married, he legally adopted me so he is my real dad, not my stepdad. Despite coming from Taiwan (he moved to Canada at age 18 for uni,) he is an openly-loving, jovial person. His parents are great with me but I know they were very cold to him growing up. There are still times when my dad feels like his parents don’t love him, and he’s 49. So he showered me with love and affection for 18 years. Well really 27, but I just haven’t lived close to him in 9 years. Love you Dad ❤️
He was spot on with that passed-down trauma, it's everywhere :/ My grandma thinks I have to work hard my whole life and not have fun because she wasn't allowed to. That's terrible, our generation has to stop this.
i am sure there was trauma but at the same time, hard work and preserverence are some of the traits that i dont see being passed down these days... So many people hoping for get rich schemes or be an "influencer" etc etc.. We should continue to insist that our kids work hard in schools, i dont think this is a bad thing. At the same time, we have to teach our kids how to have fun after we earn $$..
Heart broken when he said all that.😭 I am so so lucky born in a nontypical Chinese family. My parents are proud of me all the time. I didn't realize how precious it is. Instead I always thought they are ignoring my fault and kept cautious with their words. I should be grateful.
Definitely passed down generational trauma along with being an immigrant in America. Currently navigating this myself, it is tough at times, but I've learned a lot as well. Great clip choice Jamie! It's something that's not talked about a lot..
Hard to grow up with a high self esteem in an Asian household. That is the GD truth right there. Especially if you're female. My mom is Korean and she did not hold back
@@chetthebee1322 Don't be weird. You described an extreme scenario. There is a middle ground between being constantly pressured into meeting impossible ever shifting expectations and total disinterest.
most traditional societies do that. My German grandma is the same. When I was 13 I put on some make up. My grandma comes into the room and says : I always admired the girls who knew how to put on make up so beautifully, unfortunately you're not one of them.😂
Not going to lie, some parents have the idea that being adult means you stop having fun, be boring, and dedicate your whole life to work. Part of learning from your parents is knowing their faults, and not repeat them.
I worked with 2 Vietnamese guys whos stories of escaping the fall of Vietnam should be made into Hollywood movies. Thats one reason why these immigrant generations are such high achievers. They aren't over achieving, they are simply reacting to surviving some horrible post war shit that given even the smallest of opportunity they sieze it 100%
Now I get why he was insulting William hung when clearly the guy was just socially awkward and just wanted to live his dream..... His dad treated him the same
My mother has often commented on my shoulders being too wide for a girl since I was little. I'm now 33. She makes fun of them. Still. What's more, the other day, she talked about how uncomfortable it felt when her mother used to tell her how her shoulders looked wide and masculine for a girl. She still feels insecure about her body and is making me feel the same way without even realizing it. She's like, "Your shoulders look ugly because you're my daughter. lol" That passed down trauma theory is so true.
Same! Not shoulders but other things. My mom being so self critical on herself WAS the reason she criticized me all this while. Took me nearly two decades to come to this realization.
That’s why I long ago stopped giving a shit about parental approval and what anybody thought of me. Live your life, it’s way too short to live a lie for someone else’s standards and expectations and selfish desires.
Joe rogan up there instigating, but it does feel like his dad is jealous because he worked systematically his whole life and wasted his whole life doing things the systematic way and not finding his love, and Jimmy said forget this system and went with his heart and found success, he clearly overlooks the boldness and heart his son has to be a go getter.
Your psychological insight is from a western perspective. From an Asian viewpoint, you cant feel jealous of a younger person because you always have an advantage they dont. Life experience.
Every asian childhood was very different too, but in my experience, they wanted the best for their kids. They put you down so that you can work hard, suceed, and prove them wrong.
There's Asian parents, but then there were my parents. Didn't run fast enough on the soccer pitch, nose broken in car ride home. Violin not parallel to the floor, arm bruised with cane. Got lost at a park, pretend abandoned on highway. I think even Asian parents would think my parents went too far. I have a problem controlling anger, and most of the time it's directed inward. Definitely helps when I need to push myself, but definitely fucks me when I need to be kind to myself, or forgive myself. And honestly, I'm too scared to build close friendships, get into a relationship, let alone start my own family, out of fear of passing on this trauma. I don't trust myself not to hurt someone close to me, so I keep everyone at arms length for their own safety. It's a lonely existence, but I take some solace in the fact that I'm preventing potential damage to others.
You just need a very good friend that you can finally be very close to, emotionally as well as physically, so you both can reflect on each other --- sort of "bouncing" ideas and deep sincere internal thoughts off each other (with no anger --- to be constructive only). Good luck.
Please try meditation. Just 10 minutes. Breath in and out slowly and try not to think about anything. All the pain will be triggered and you will have to face it. But it will help in the long term. I have experienced it too. I don't have any trauma but general anxiety sometimes. And it helped me.
Welcome to being Chinese. It’s also called narcissism. Took me years to figure this out! No nurturing love and affection. What is that!? Puts downs of how “you’re not good enough” is the cultural norm. “Pride and face” is your mission to carry out to represent your family. 😆🤷🏻♀️🙌⚡️💯
Agreed about the passed-down trauma. I experienced the same thing in German culture. They pride themselves on being honest, but it is more often than not put-downs.
Hey jimmy in case you're reading this, I just want to say that your father said that because he is probably not used to showing affectionate emotions to family members (the tough parent mask goes through generations). I think it was just a lot of pressure on to show that emotion in that situation. I think subconsciously he knew he should have said YES and that's why he told you later he didn't get the references as sort of apology. Its also a way for him to escape admitting it's hard for him. So give him some time :) he probably loves you and proud of you. Everyone has their own journey :) But i dunno really i'm just a comment on the youtubes
That hurts man. I'm sorry 😞. You deserved better. I felt the pain. You're a talented entertainers man. It's not cool to be a ball breaker to your son. You can to everyone else but your son. Shit man!
Sounds like his father has a lot of issues, and I am sorry for that. It's not like his father just decided when he was eleven years old that he wanted to be an asshole when he grows up. I grew up with a friend like this he was Chinese and had traditional Chinese parents who were always pushing him to be successful. He has to be a MD/PHD in something even though that wasn't his passion. He loved working on cars especially body work and paint jobs ,but he was an excellent mechanic as well. His grandfather owned a nursery and grew specialized Orchid hybrids,James did enjoy working with the flowers and his grandfather. Last I heard from James he was working on his PHD in Botany at Fresno state. He would still time to time take on auto work as this was what he loved and his parents frowned upon. His folks put so much pressure on him to be a doctor. I often wonder do Asian parents do this because they want their children to succeed or do they do this so their children can afford to take care of the parents in their old age. Kind of like a family funded 401K plan. Be successful not for yourself but for us!
Not the taking care of the parents’ part. There is a saying in China, raise your children to 100 years old, being worried about them for the first 99 years. Asian parents want their kids to have financial securities so they don’t need to worry about them, but even if their kids have that, they would still worry. Facts, there some Chinese elderly would commit suicide if they suffer a terminal illness just no to burden their Children.
Yeah my moms family is chinese im half filipino and chinese and my cousins and I are all doctors here in the Philippines but we are greatful now after finishing it all.
it's funny because i'm starting to break away from everything my parents have taught me. parents used fear to control and manipulate me... naturally i became a people pleaser as i was walking on egg shells and didn't want to rock the boat. now that i'm older and am savvy to the 'guilt tripping tactics', asian friends i know say that's just normal. guilt tripping and manipulation isn't normal. yet because it's so common in Asian culture, people accept it as the norm. you have to heal yourself and redefine what's normal. redefine what a healthy relationship is. i was in an emotionally abusive and controlling relationship before because that was my normal. now, even if it's selfish, i have to put my own needs first that's the tricky part - being a good daughter/son for your parents vs choosing what is right for you and your needs.... the guilt that comes with putting your own needs first and choosing your own happiness also if your parents marriage is rocky, kids are the scapegoat in the family... they become the focus. or worse yet the kids feel like they have to take responsibility for the parent's marriage/happiness or emotionally support their parents we have to break the cycle guys. heal yourself so you have a healthy relationship and don't pass on or project your past wounds onto your kids we have to do the hard work because we are smart enough to be aware. we need to stop the generational trauma now! you'll notice when you've started to change when you put firm boundaries up... when you don't feel guilty for saying no to your parents, when they can't make you feel a certain type of way if you don't do as they please. when you see them for who they really are....when you no longer need their approval because you define your own success, you define yourself and you love yourself unconditionally don't take your parent's conditional love to actually be love, just see their love for what it is... their limited capacity to love you as you truly are then give that power back to yourself. give yourself unconditional love. vow to love yourself no matter what: even if shit goes wrong today, even if your parents hate you, even if you ate too much icecream haha, even if your nose looks too big, even if you think you're fat, you are you! there's no one else like you
That bit about never being good enough is the toughest one for me. My Chinese immigrant parents wanted absolute obedience but even you did obey them they will always find fault somehow. Damned if you do. Damned if you don't.
I guess I was that rare kid who didn't give a flying f**k what my immigrant parents thought of me. Please don't give them the power to use guilt and expectations to control your actions and affect your self-worth. You don't owe them anything. They were the adults who chose to have you, chose to immigrate, and it was their duty to look after you. They don't get to weaponize love and then expect you to respect them. Respect is reciprocal. I love my parents and we have a much better relationship now that I'm in mid-life because I refused to let them walk all over me when I was young.
I totally understand where he’s from. I grew up in Hong Kong too and like Jimmy, I came to study in San Diego. My mom did exactly the same to me. She visited me every year. Every time she would tell me how “fat” I was. Am like, thank you mom, I don’t deserve it. After all, I was 125 lbs 5’3. I don’t consider myself “fat”! Oh well, being an Asian kid really not easy …🤣
Hahahah...yup, I get told for getting fat at dinner table regularly growing up. Its just how Asian moms/aunts communicate with us. So we all grew up not able to take a compliment, because we are more comfortable with criticisms. 🤷🏻♀️
im sure its different in different asian households. my mom use to be a tiger mom cuz she use to be hella poor when she was younger since my grandpa went bankrupt. at the time in our country, only 3 students out of each school is picked for government uni plus if you werent malay your chances of getting in are slim (im chinese). thats why my mom puts importance on my grades and how i need a degree because shes scared her children ends up living her childhood. My dad on the other hand wanted to be an artist and did an art major in america after saving up money to study there. after completing his degree, he didnt manage to get a job in the US, flew back to our country (a third world country that did not respect artists) and couldnt find a stable job. he ended up taking the best job he got offered, being a manager of a tv streaming company, never left his job since. due to all this, its hard for me to really get mad at them sometimes considering how they just want me to live a good life and minimize my suffering in the future. Also idk who can relate to this but due to all the brutally honest opinions my parents have made about me, ive come to just be emotionally numb to insults and ybh idk if thats a good thing? ive typically become emotionally numb-
I guess his father feel being good at academic and finding a “real job” are the correct path been tested by thousands of examples. Yet indulging yourself with your hobby, fav sport, girls are the distraction of the correct path
Asians are just direct af in that aspect and it’s amazing when people would translate stuff that was said when I was overseas I would be rolling like are you allowed to say that
About the part about telling someone what's wrong with their face: I didn't saw a buddy for a while. Then I visited him, and when I saw him I noticed he got considerably fat, and I instantly said 'Hey fattie!'. Then he calledme a bastard and we both laughed. 😅
As an Asian, I would say that parents arent supposed to praise their children in public. Need to show humility, even though is proud of the child privately. Like say someone says "Your son so clever, results all A". The Asian parent would "No lah, ok ok only. This time only all A, usually no. Ok only, not very clever lah" The dad's respond of "Jimmy not funny" is overly negative though. The usual Asian response is "Ok lah, not bad" & smile. They wouldnt say its great, I'm very proud of my son
I’m a Asian and these are my career choices
Doctor, Lawyer, Professor, disgrace of the family
Engineer?
Engineer is an option too
An asian*
I'm major at the last one.
One more choice in my case: Engineer. I guess I was a bit more lucky.
"it's hard to grow up with high self esteem in an Asian household"
That describes asian households tenfold.
Yup.. . Nothing you do is good enough.. with a shitload of insults and comparisons
Asian households in a shellnut
I can confirm this for sure.
100% lmfao
100% true
Worked in China for 2 years. One of my staff came up to me and said “boss you’ve been going to the gym for a while, but you’re still fat. Just give up and enjoy yourself”
True but like Jimmy said Chinese are less sensitive about people being overweight because that symbolise prosperities, as least that’s true in the past.
Sounds like some good wisdom there to be fair.
i hope you insulted him equally to enlighten him
The Observer yes true, it was definitely said with more kindness than anything else
The Observer I'm immensely prosperous
Part of becoming an adult is acknowledging that your parents have faults, flaws and shortcomings.
Choose to be happy my friends
That’s good insight
Well with abusive, violent parents its obvious
Yeah we all have flaws
That has nothing to do with being an adult, lol.
"he's a funny guy, but sometimes it's hard to be his son"
Every asian parent, and mostly chinese things.
@@dannypratama4235 same with country parents
@@JimTheKid sorry but I am not from the US. What do you mean by country parents?
@@L3iglL By country I mean outside of the city and in certain states like Georgia, Texas, Alabama, etc. Basically everywhere in the south that's a while away from town.
@@L3iglL it's just parents in america that lived in rural parts of a state where most farmland and anything away from a city
I’m white but my adoptive father is a Taiwanese immigrant. He started dating my mom when I was 10 months old. My biological father died before I was born. When he and my mom married, he legally adopted me so he is my real dad, not my stepdad. Despite coming from Taiwan (he moved to Canada at age 18 for uni,) he is an openly-loving, jovial person. His parents are great with me but I know they were very cold to him growing up. There are still times when my dad feels like his parents don’t love him, and he’s 49. So he showered me with love and affection for 18 years. Well really 27, but I just haven’t lived close to him in 9 years. Love you Dad ❤️
brah, that's touching af. nobody talks about it, but this new generation of asian parents are doing it better than the previous ones
Kryptonite oh for sure.
That's amazing
Sounds like somebody was an ungrateful little shit for 9 years
Can he adopt me too
He was spot on with that passed-down trauma, it's everywhere :/
My grandma thinks I have to work hard my whole life and not have fun because she wasn't allowed to.
That's terrible, our generation has to stop this.
Tough times create strong people, strong people create easy times. Easy times create weak people, weak people create tough times.
@@parkermaki3799 Well said.
"Insert qoute" -Sun Tzu
i am sure there was trauma but at the same time, hard work and preserverence are some of the traits that i dont see being passed down these days... So many people hoping for get rich schemes or be an "influencer" etc etc.. We should continue to insist that our kids work hard in schools, i dont think this is a bad thing. At the same time, we have to teach our kids how to have fun after we earn $$..
@@andyyuen it shouldn't be passed down. you shouldn't have to work hard if you don't want to. It's not a virtue.
Sounds like a therapy session
Haha dude every comment Joe is just hammering that wedge between him and his dad.
Yes
Normal asian peer to peer conversation lmao
And that's good!
Heart broken when he said all that.😭
I am so so lucky born in a nontypical Chinese family. My parents are proud of me all the time.
I didn't realize how precious it is. Instead I always thought they are ignoring my fault and kept cautious with their words.
I should be grateful.
This dude is a great talker, great guest!
You hear a lot about Tiger Moms but not enough about Lion Dads
Finally! Someone said it!
Dude, you gotta get off the Internet 😂 you’re everywhere!!
Xplora213 if he’s everywhere then that means you’re everywhere as well cuz u see his comment 😂
Lions in the wild don’t really give a shit about their young. You need a better comparison. I don’t have one either.
Joe "I had a korean friend growing up he was training for taekwondo nationals while completing his medical residency" rogan
That’s so true what he said about how honest Asians are. My grandma is Filipino and she does the exact same thing.
Actually this was a deep conversation. A lot of people can relate to what he is saying.
Asian parent sound like African families. That’s how we are raised too.
Toori Baba defs bruh I just ducked one this morning
Lol for sure. South asian here Pakistani it's all the same for us 🤣
@@FocusedGio lol mate I had to parry a steel toed boot, sandals and a TV remote before I left home today
Shoes, frying pan, and my favorite was when you got to pick the branch before the beating lol.
@@arycosta7293 lol got beat so bad and then had to apologise to our parents 🤣 no remorse from them whatsoever hahaha
Definitely passed down generational trauma along with being an immigrant in America. Currently navigating this myself, it is tough at times, but I've learned a lot as well. Great clip choice Jamie! It's something that's not talked about a lot..
I feel like I just watched a therapy session
"Eric Baachman, this is your father and you are not funny, and fat."
Same with Mexicans my family is so brutally honest and disguise it as comedy a lot of the time but some of it hurts sometimes also think it’s trauma
This guy was masterful on Silicon Valley, such a great funny character despite the dorks crying about the “stereotypical accent”
I eat... the fish
Yeah so true. The accent sold it so well.
I always got the impression that the character used peoples perception of his accent to make them think he was stupid, when he definitely wasn't.
i want to kiss ons da moufth
They never set foot on silicon valley obviously. It's Chinatown.
0:55 LMAO Bobby Lee's dad was made of the same wood, Asian parents not getting their sons jokes is a thing it seems
My mum str8 out ignores me wen i talk.n i aint got no dad.lol
My immigrant father (Scotland) would have said the same thing for exactly the same reasons - passed down trauma and work ethic
Hard to grow up with a high self esteem in an Asian household.
That is the GD truth right there. Especially if you're female. My mom is Korean and she did not hold back
So having high esteem comes from being in a family that doesn't give a rats ass about you or your education like I did?
It's why the majority of them go no-contact with their parents; what's the point of negative experiences?
@@chetthebee1322 Lol any sort of extreme isn't usually a good thing.
@@J-BiRTH Learn to read. I said "esteem" not extreme.
@@chetthebee1322 Don't be weird. You described an extreme scenario.
There is a middle ground between being constantly pressured into meeting impossible ever shifting expectations and total disinterest.
most traditional societies do that. My German grandma is the same. When I was 13 I put on some make up. My grandma comes into the room and says : I always admired the girls who knew how to put on make up so beautifully, unfortunately you're not one of them.😂
Jimmy's soo salty about his dad it's hilarious😂😂
Not going to lie, some parents have the idea that being adult means you stop having fun, be boring, and dedicate your whole life to work. Part of learning from your parents is knowing their faults, and not repeat them.
I have social anxiety disorder and my dad constantly mocks me mainly when we're around other people.
I worked with 2 Vietnamese guys whos stories of escaping the fall of Vietnam should be made into Hollywood movies. Thats one reason why these immigrant generations are such high achievers. They aren't over achieving, they are simply reacting to surviving some horrible post war shit that given even the smallest of opportunity they sieze it 100%
LOL! I’ve done that Robin Williams thing to some people and made them cry. Works every time it’s legit therapy!
Now I get why he was insulting William hung when clearly the guy was just socially awkward and just wanted to live his dream..... His dad treated him the same
Is this a counseling session recorded and aired?
My mother has often commented on my shoulders being too wide for a girl since I was little. I'm now 33. She makes fun of them. Still.
What's more, the other day, she talked about how uncomfortable it felt when her mother used to tell her how her shoulders looked wide and masculine for a girl. She still feels insecure about her body and is making me feel the same way without even realizing it. She's like, "Your shoulders look ugly because you're my daughter. lol" That passed down trauma theory is so true.
Same! Not shoulders but other things. My mom being so self critical on herself WAS the reason she criticized me all this while.
Took me nearly two decades to come to this realization.
That’s why I long ago stopped giving a shit about parental approval and what anybody thought of me. Live your life, it’s way too short to live a lie for someone else’s standards and expectations and selfish desires.
the title is kinda misleading, ngl, I thought man tears were about to be shed
Joe rogan up there instigating, but it does feel like his dad is jealous because he worked systematically his whole life and wasted his whole life doing things the systematic way and not finding his love, and Jimmy said forget this system and went with his heart and found success, he clearly overlooks the boldness and heart his son has to be a go getter.
you insightful af lol
Your psychological insight is from a western perspective.
From an Asian viewpoint, you cant feel jealous of a younger person because you always have an advantage they dont.
Life experience.
Guy is hilarious and I can’t wait too see him one day
..then what will you do.. when you.. see him..
@@jamskof 💀💀💀💀💀💀
Your were right jimmy..Chinese parents are very tough teaching their kids. Me and mu siblings born in Perú. I feel your feeling..Nice interview.
It’s so fucking true for what jimmy said . I got insulted by my mom and my grandmother for my whole life.
And it hurts 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲
Every asian childhood was very different too, but in my experience, they wanted the best for their kids. They put you down so that you can work hard, suceed, and prove them wrong.
This show is so real. I love it.
I think talking to Joe is therapeutic for Jimmy right here.
There's Asian parents, but then there were my parents. Didn't run fast enough on the soccer pitch, nose broken in car ride home. Violin not parallel to the floor, arm bruised with cane. Got lost at a park, pretend abandoned on highway. I think even Asian parents would think my parents went too far. I have a problem controlling anger, and most of the time it's directed inward. Definitely helps when I need to push myself, but definitely fucks me when I need to be kind to myself, or forgive myself. And honestly, I'm too scared to build close friendships, get into a relationship, let alone start my own family, out of fear of passing on this trauma. I don't trust myself not to hurt someone close to me, so I keep everyone at arms length for their own safety. It's a lonely existence, but I take some solace in the fact that I'm preventing potential damage to others.
You gotta take that chance. It helps getting things out
You just need a very good friend that you can finally be very close to, emotionally as well as physically, so you both can reflect on each other --- sort of "bouncing" ideas and deep sincere internal thoughts off each other (with no anger --- to be constructive only). Good luck.
if it's within your means, get professional help, dude. you're worth it and it'll make the world a better place for you and others
Please try meditation. Just 10 minutes. Breath in and out slowly and try not to think about anything. All the pain will be triggered and you will have to face it. But it will help in the long term. I have experienced it too. I don't have any trauma but general anxiety sometimes. And it helped me.
Welcome to being Chinese. It’s also called narcissism. Took me years to figure this out! No nurturing love and affection. What is that!? Puts downs of how “you’re not good enough” is the cultural norm. “Pride and face” is your mission to carry out to represent your family. 😆🤷🏻♀️🙌⚡️💯
I eata da fish. this guy is hilarious in standup and acting I look forward to what he does in the future
Agreed about the passed-down trauma. I experienced the same thing in German culture. They pride themselves on being honest, but it is more often than not put-downs.
2:16 He went from laughing to serious right away 😂 5:17 You and her? pff yeah 😂😂 Joe: WOW
No bro I am an Asian father in both generations. It’s to keep our kids humble. It’s lots and lots and lots of tough love
Thats hiw you feel, and thats how he feels.
Thanks for sharing
Been through the same
Hey jimmy in case you're reading this, I just want to say that your father said that because he is probably not used to showing affectionate emotions to family members (the tough parent mask goes through generations). I think it was just a lot of pressure on to show that emotion in that situation. I think subconsciously he knew he should have said YES and that's why he told you later he didn't get the references as sort of apology. Its also a way for him to escape admitting it's hard for him. So give him some time :) he probably loves you and proud of you. Everyone has their own journey :)
But i dunno really i'm just a comment on the youtubes
Nah he needs to be top dawg
That hurts man. I'm sorry 😞. You deserved better. I felt the pain. You're a talented entertainers man. It's not cool to be a ball breaker to your son. You can to everyone else but your son. Shit man!
Sounds like his father has a lot of issues, and I am sorry for that. It's not like his father just decided when he was eleven years old that he wanted to be an asshole when he grows up. I grew up with a friend like this he was Chinese and had traditional Chinese parents who were always pushing him to be successful. He has to be a MD/PHD in something even though that wasn't his passion. He loved working on cars especially body work and paint jobs ,but he was an excellent mechanic as well. His grandfather owned a nursery and grew specialized Orchid hybrids,James did enjoy working with the flowers and his grandfather. Last I heard from James he was working on his PHD in Botany at Fresno state. He would still time to time take on auto work as this was what he loved and his parents frowned upon. His folks put so much pressure on him to be a doctor. I often wonder do Asian parents do this because they want their children to succeed or do they do this so their children can afford to take care of the parents in their old age. Kind of like a family funded 401K plan. Be successful not for yourself but for us!
Not the taking care of the parents’ part. There is a saying in China, raise your children to 100 years old, being worried about them for the first 99 years. Asian parents want their kids to have financial securities so they don’t need to worry about them, but even if their kids have that, they would still worry. Facts, there some Chinese elderly would commit suicide if they suffer a terminal illness just no to burden their Children.
Yeah my moms family is chinese im half filipino and chinese and my cousins and I are all doctors here in the Philippines but we are greatful now after finishing it all.
@@pussyeater4111lmao okay with a screen name like yours and bad grammar... ok DOCTOR😂😂😂😂😂
it's funny because i'm starting to break away from everything my parents have taught me. parents used fear to control and manipulate me... naturally i became a people pleaser as i was walking on egg shells and didn't want to rock the boat. now that i'm older and am savvy to the 'guilt tripping tactics', asian friends i know say that's just normal. guilt tripping and manipulation isn't normal. yet because it's so common in Asian culture, people accept it as the norm.
you have to heal yourself and redefine what's normal. redefine what a healthy relationship is. i was in an emotionally abusive and controlling relationship before because that was my normal.
now, even if it's selfish, i have to put my own needs first
that's the tricky part - being a good daughter/son for your parents vs choosing what is right for you and your needs.... the guilt that comes with putting your own needs first and choosing your own happiness
also if your parents marriage is rocky, kids are the scapegoat in the family... they become the focus. or worse yet the kids feel like they have to take responsibility for the parent's marriage/happiness or emotionally support their parents
we have to break the cycle guys. heal yourself so you have a healthy relationship and don't pass on or project your past wounds onto your kids
we have to do the hard work because we are smart enough to be aware. we need to stop the generational trauma now!
you'll notice when you've started to change when you put firm boundaries up... when you don't feel guilty for saying no to your parents, when they can't make you feel a certain type of way if you don't do as they please. when you see them for who they really are....when you no longer need their approval because you define your own success, you define yourself and you love yourself unconditionally
don't take your parent's conditional love to actually be love, just see their love for what it is... their limited capacity to love you as you truly are
then give that power back to yourself. give yourself unconditional love. vow to love yourself no matter what: even if shit goes wrong today, even if your parents hate you, even if you ate too much icecream haha, even if your nose looks too big, even if you think you're fat, you are you! there's no one else like you
Loved this dude in silicone valley
JIN YANG!
Rogan is the new Ed Sullivan.
5:25 Joe reads Jimmy look a BOOK lmaooo
Therapy w Joe Rogan
True so true. My mom does that a lot !
Hey, he is Richard's son. Nice to see him. Hope Richard has his special soon.
Growing up in HK, this really, really hits home. Coming 2nd out of many hundreds just begs the question: why weren't you 1st?
Mayne this is so relatable lmao
That bit about never being good enough is the toughest one for me. My Chinese immigrant parents wanted absolute obedience but even you did obey them they will always find fault somehow. Damned if you do. Damned if you don't.
I guess I was that rare kid who didn't give a flying f**k what my immigrant parents thought of me. Please don't give them the power to use guilt and expectations to control your actions and affect your self-worth. You don't owe them anything. They were the adults who chose to have you, chose to immigrate, and it was their duty to look after you. They don't get to weaponize love and then expect you to respect them. Respect is reciprocal. I love my parents and we have a much better relationship now that I'm in mid-life because I refused to let them walk all over me when I was young.
That's great. You were strong minded very young
Anyone else excited about the ps5 reveal?
Gamers are hyped
very
PC master-race checking in
Josue Luna ima be honest the console looks cool but the games shown were mostly a snooze fest
His story reminds me of that king of hill episode with Khan and his father in law😂😂😂
This segment is a pretty accurate representation about how stereotypically Chinese parents behave.
Trauma is the simplest tool to implement mass social control.
Interesting
I totally understand where he’s from. I grew up in Hong Kong too and like Jimmy, I came to study in San Diego. My mom did exactly the same to me. She visited me every year. Every time she would tell me how “fat” I was. Am like, thank you mom, I don’t deserve it. After all, I was 125 lbs 5’3. I don’t consider myself “fat”! Oh well, being an Asian kid really not easy …🤣
Well in his dad’s defense, you have to interview the man to see where he is coming from.
We KNOW where he comes from
i think that relationship works because they're both cool people. i'm jealous of family that everyone can take a joke.
This makes the world need more Asian comedians
So relatable
Id like to see Jimmy ball probably plays like Earl boykins
This is exactly what not just parents but everybody in Ethiopia would do they just tell the truth and you can never satisfy them
Hahahah...yup, I get told for getting fat at dinner table regularly growing up. Its just how Asian moms/aunts communicate with us. So we all grew up not able to take a compliment, because we are more comfortable with criticisms. 🤷🏻♀️
I’m black and this is mainly in my household too but I’m stronger than ever
Yeah something like this happened to me before, when ur parent says their not proud of u if rlly hurts, even if it’s a joke
This podcast was probably very therapeutic for him
His father's behaviour does affect Jimmy even now
im sure its different in different asian households. my mom use to be a tiger mom cuz she use to be hella poor when she was younger since my grandpa went bankrupt. at the time in our country, only 3 students out of each school is picked for government uni plus if you werent malay your chances of getting in are slim (im chinese). thats why my mom puts importance on my grades and how i need a degree because shes scared her children ends up living her childhood. My dad on the other hand wanted to be an artist and did an art major in america after saving up money to study there. after completing his degree, he didnt manage to get a job in the US, flew back to our country (a third world country that did not respect artists) and couldnt find a stable job. he ended up taking the best job he got offered, being a manager of a tv streaming company, never left his job since. due to all this, its hard for me to really get mad at them sometimes considering how they just want me to live a good life and minimize my suffering in the future.
Also idk who can relate to this but due to all the brutally honest opinions my parents have made about me, ive come to just be emotionally numb to insults and ybh idk if thats a good thing? ive typically become emotionally numb-
Sorry to hear that. What do you work as at the moment? Do you enjoy it?
This hits home. Break this fucking cycle.
I guess his father feel being good at academic and finding a “real job” are the correct path been tested by thousands of examples. Yet indulging yourself with your hobby, fav sport, girls are the distraction of the correct path
I like Jimmy's dad, sounds just like me
Jimmy, nicely color coordinated with the curtains.
Can relate!!
Asians are just direct af in that aspect and it’s amazing when people would translate stuff that was said when I was overseas I would be rolling like are you allowed to say that
This was done on me too. My mother and father did this to me. My mom was not athletic so she thought I wasn’t.
Sad. But this is do true for a lot of asian kids
About the part about telling someone what's wrong with their face:
I didn't saw a buddy for a while. Then I visited him, and when I saw him I noticed he got considerably fat, and I instantly said 'Hey fattie!'. Then he calledme a bastard and we both laughed. 😅
it has nothing to do with generational trauma. it is just bad habit. people dont realize it is bad. they need to be told and trained to change.
People need to stop saying 'Asian' while describing a Chinese/Korean/Japanese person.
Israelis, for example, are Asian too!
explain I have not heard of this
Ppl get the point when you say asians. Why so politically correct ?
@@KillaBean416 - if I called you 'Mexican', it is most likely inaccurate and annoying.
Marcelo Flores what’s the first thing in your mind about an “Asian” is he chinese or indian??
I'm fairly sure his father doesn't know how to gut a fish, only eat em and leave the guts and shit in the sink
Self esteem and asian household... dang I felt that one
His father is not part of the demographic of Yang’s audience. My dad doesn’t even get my humor.
6:43 I know this is true for my Asian dad too
I’m white. My dad grew up poor. He doesn’t think I have any humor at all, and “You can do better” is all I ever heard
jimmy o should do a parody of xi jinping and jiang zemin
Most comics went through a lot of shit
As an Asian, I would say that parents arent supposed to praise their children in public. Need to show humility, even though is proud of the child privately.
Like say someone says "Your son so clever, results all A". The Asian parent would "No lah, ok ok only. This time only all A, usually no. Ok only, not very clever lah"
The dad's respond of "Jimmy not funny" is overly negative though.
The usual Asian response is "Ok lah, not bad" & smile.
They wouldnt say its great, I'm very proud of my son
I have a feeling like his parents are the actual jian yang from silicon valey
Joe is my therapist
With all the shortcomings in us, it hard to know how to parent a kid. 😁