@@morimori7456 Why not? Do you think I have nothing better to do than to give people false hope? Nah, I'm too nice a guy (exept that I'm a nihilistic cynic most of the time). Btw being good at drawing requires a lot of motoric, visual memory and creative skills (which I definitely lack) so don't sell yourself so short.
Some teachers actually do understand this, but they are required to do what the education system tells them to do for a living. And this is coming from a middle schooler.
They are supposed to teach you not baby you. Very simple. They are not friends they are not colleagues they are teachers they have one job and that is to teach. It is not the fault of the teacher if you do not feel personally motivated to do the work or to learn the subject matter.
@@neghersteinpeepee2196 Yes they're supposed to teach you, but they're also supposed to help you learn, and be a caring and supportive role model. If you can't feel motivated to do anything, let alone learn, a teacher is also supposed to help you move on. They aren't supposed to be robots incapable of human emotion. They're supposed to be role models who can help you if you're going through something rough.
If us teens actually were listened to maybe it would change. When we tell you ‘I’m stressed out I’m not coping’ the words ‘ooh wait until you get to my age’ won’t help. When we say ‘I’m sad’ we don’t want ‘ahh cheer up your only young’. We tell you this, we try and try to tell you but adults sometimes just can’t and won’t listen. No one understands
Smiling depression is one of the most dangerous kinds. No one sees the signs until it is too late because to others there are no warning signs. It is so easily missed and that type of depression is the kind that I have. No one sees it and I don’t have the heart to tell anyone and it haunts me.
It is hard for people to help. If they arent in your friend group, it is hard to get you in a conversation about this topic. It is not that hard to see though. The quote: "The eyes are the window to the soul." Is more than accurate. In this case as well, yours eyes will tell. Your face may smile, but the sadness in the eyes will not disappear.
I haven't smiled for 9 years straight (IRL) it's not a problem with my face no not a disease no I don't want to say why I just can't so no one really asks me if I'm happy today or not "her face is like that, she doesn't have emotions" it makes me want to cry every night
It pisses me off that there's usually no signs and all my signs were completely ignored until I almost died. It just makes me think how many people are going through it all alone
what were the signs that were ignored? we are not mind readers. you explaining these signs could help us help hundreds of thousands of kids with depression and suicidal thoughts. no one is ever alone unless they choose to be.
My fourth grade teacher set up a system where if I stayed organized and on task all day, he would sit with me one on one for 5 minutes after school, just talking or playing his guitar. I have learning disabilities that make organization really hard, but just knowing I would get to spend time with him after school made me work harder. I'm now 41 years old and I still remember the songs he used to sing me during those times. I went back to my grade school years ago to see if he was still there; he was, and he remembered me. Good teachers are magical.
“Oh but it’s just a phase!” “You’ll get over it” “Just talk about it and it will get better” “ only you can control your feelings” “Every teenager feels like that” “You’re just attention seeking” “You’re just feeling sad today, you will feel better tomorrow” Those few phrases are what make us not want to get help because sadly most adults say that or even our own peers. Maybe if people understood mental health better this wouldn’t be happening
But also when you finally work up the courage after all the criticism, to try and get better they mock and judge us for trying to get better, saying things like "attention seekers" and "someone has it worse than you stop pretending."
"It's the hormones" they say.. "It's all fine" they say.. "It's gonna pass" they say.. But is it? How we feel is all we can feel and nothing else can stop that. We let our feelings get the best of us and sometimes.. well most of the time.. it hurts us. It kills us. We feel and see what we want to see and feel. It's within our minds that hurt us. We can't help it. As someone who is still going through depression and has attempted suicide, I can say that I don't want to die. I just want to end the pain. It's killing me. It's surrounding me and darkening my life. That's what I see and feel. I can't stop it. It's who I am. Will it end? Maybe. But when will it? I don't know. Maybe soon or.. maybe never
The reason for depression is clear to me like nothing else and i know it, because i went trough it and still do it at times. Its the craving to be loved. To me, love is not an emotion, it is the only thing that matters. Nothing can compare to it, everything else falls utterly short in comparison. What does anything really matter without it. Its like dust. Its useless. So when it is felt, that there is no love, life step by step becomes darker and meaningless and eventually will lead to suicide. Because no person and im sure of it can live without it. That is why such a letter that this teacher has written is of such an importance, because it shows that you are important and that you are needed.
in 7th grade i once wrote a suicide note in class and tore it up by the end of class only to have someone find it and give it to the teacher who gave it to the principal, so i had to sit in the principals office with him and my teacher and my abusive mother all demanding to know why on earth i would want to kill myself.
I find intresting how adults say "it only gets worse enjoy it while you a still can" but expect us just live with knowing the future sucks more than the present, Knowing we are working so hard for it to only get worse . That gives us no hope. Then when we try to "enjoy it while it lasts" we are told to work giving us little time for fun. People wonder why mental health is so bad it's because of our bad aditude towards life or the future
YES!! my parents do this all the time. They always say, oh just wait life gets WAY more difficult. That doesnt help me bruh. If any parent is reading DO NOT SAY THAT PLEASE. it hurts knowing that if u are struggling so much right now that it only gets harder. Even if that's true WE DKNT NEED TO HEAR THAT. we want to hope it gets better. I hope anyone reading this just knows, you are loved and appreciated, I promise 💕
I absolutely hate when people say that. It's like, "seriously? Well, if it's just going to go downhill from here when I'm already at the bottom, I honestly don't see a point in staying for it."
@@lieselbrehmer ikr it didn't help me a already suicidal kid to know life's just sucks. It made it easier for me to think that was an option. Honestly life can be what you make it for the most part. Control what can to make your life the happiest it can be.try not to sweat the stuff you can't. Honestly we need a better outlook towards the future. If we focus on the positives instead of constantly highlighting the negatives we be much better of societally. Tha being said it ok to be negative at times.
I wish people understood how passionate she is about her students. On our way home from the talk, she expressed to me how heartbroken she was about her student committing suicide and how it changed her perspective completely. She truly cares about her kids in the classroom and outside of the classroom. It is so unbelievably rare to come across that.
I am 14 I have been suicidal for a few months and when I starting getting these thought my science teacher did the same thing as you. He wrote individual notes to all 140 of his students. I have a bulletin board in my bedroom and I keep it up there and read it when I am in the darkest times. It doesn’t always make me feel better but my teacher is the nicest guy with the biggest heart
Hey, I'm proud of you for pushing through whatever it may be you are struggling with. I hope you know you are loved and appreciated. Even though I dont know you, I hope you have a fun rest of your high school experience and after that a fun lifetime. You can do this :) 💕
Taylor Garness Just another symptom of the superficial pity society gives to those they know they’re guilty of failing. I know the feeling, it’s human nature not to recognize the damage until after it’s done.
Exactly. I’ve been to the funeral of a kid who killed themself and over and over I kept hearing the phrase “if only they’d asked for help” or “this could have been prevented if they just told somebody” but as someone who has attempted before, I know that they often do. I told my friends. I told my therapist. I told my parents. I told everyone I trusted how I felt. And you know what they said? “You just want attention” “anyone who actually feels that way would never tell anybody” or simply “so?”. These were the same people who made such friendly comments and wished to help after it was too late for my friend, they vowed to look for signs and never let it happen again. But in the end GGyourdead is exactly right. It’s human nature not to recognize the damage until after it’s done.
GGyourdead That’s why I wonder if killing myself is the only way out... Either I die and don’t have to worry about it or I live and get the help I need but I think I’m too much of a coward to try it
It is not just about suicide. I often feel like my depression isn't taken seriously because I'm not suicidal. I have depression, I struggle every day. My life may not be at danger, but my future. I would never harm myself, I know myself well enough to be able to tell that, but that doesn't mean that I don't struggel to get up in the morning and leave the house, that doesn't mean I don't spiral into the void of thoughts and fears all the time, that doesn't mean I don't lose joy in the things I do, that doesn't mean I don't hate myself. I know I deserve better but I still blame myself for not getting better, I still blame myself for not being able to do what everyone else seems to be able to do. The people around me, my family, my friends, even my therapist seem to think that it's not serious but it is. Even though I don't want to end it, I hate my life. I get little support and little understanding.
I hear you, and I could have written your words myself. 99% of the time when I'm depressed I'm not suicidal. But that doesn't mean it doesn't take a toll, on everything, especially my participation in life. "My life may not be at danger, but my future", you hit the nail right on the head. For what it's worth, I understand.
I live in Hong Kong, and there is a ridiculous amount of academic pressure on students over here. This is such a great ted talk I think teachers everywhere should learn from it.
A few days ago I was about to walk into class but my teacher stopped me and said to me, "Hey, have you been doing okay? I've noticed you've been down and quiet lately." I smiled at her and said, "I'm fine, thank you!" It was a lie, but I felt so happy that she noticed and didn't think twice about it. If she some how sees this then, thank you, Ms. Kasa, thank you.. :)
fellow 15 year old here. Thank you so much for being there for them and for saving them. I attempted suicide, failed, and called my friend for help and she helped me. You are doing a great service to this world and your very existence is a blessing.
I'm 14,iv had a suicidal friend... It would always bring me to tears that she kept saying how much she hated her life and wanted to die ... I would always try and talk her out of it ... She's ok now but we used to talk to me about everything and lately she's turned toxic... Iv had to block her and I still worry for her ... But I'm done dealing with being used... I sort of miss her ... Anyway thank you for reading my whole little story...
Someone says that for depressed people even a smile or a «thank you», or maybe just a «hello, how are you?» can make a difference. I really like the 130 individual letters!
It does! Many people with depression tend to believe that they are terrible and worthless because our minds have gone to war against us. It was hard to believe that I had any worth to the people around me so when someone showed kindness or appreciation, it was mind-blowing. It doesn't cure depression of course but it's a bright spot in the day.
it does. it might sound weird, but simply having a small conversation with someone and asking how they are doing could turn someone’s day around. sure, it won’t end depression, but it really does help. especially when i’m in that negative headspace, it helps me to realize that people can actually care about me.
Mental illness affected my education so much. I was late to school. I missed many days. And all the teachers would do was call me a slacker and a failure. I don't blame them for not knowing . i refused to socialized I even cried in class a few times and bullied right in front of teachers and all they would do is call me lazy, slacker, failure, etc. It only made things worst. Even some of my facourite teachers started to turn on me. They were all I had at the time. Like I said I don't blame them. Teaching is a handful.
I was lucky enough to have Ms. Darras as my teacher this last year, and she was 100% my favorite teacher of that year, and one of my 2 favorite teachers I've ever had. As a Senior, saying I only really enjoyed 2 of my teachers is insane. I hate school. Honestly, I do, with everything in me. I have an awful perception of school in my head, and I've almost never had a good experience when it comes to school. The reason I'm able to say "almost" is because of only 2 teachers, one being Darras. I dread going to school everyday, as it's always surrounded by negativity with admin and teachers putting this idea in my head that if I don't do well in school, I'm a failure and going to be a failure in life, which causes unbelievable amounts of stress on me, seeing that I don't do amazing in school. Ms. Darras and the other teacher are the only teachers who have made me feel like the opposite, and have made me WANT to come to school. They've ran the only classes I've ever been excited to attend. I hope that many other teachers follow in the steps of Darras, so that school can be enjoyable for many other kids who struggle with depression, especially when the root of the depression is school itself. And Ms. Darras if you see this, this is Andrew Baker and I just want to say I absolutely loved your class, it was absolutely amazing :D much love
I'm 24 and I have only had 2 teachers I really liked. The first one was the teacher I had from 2nd to 5th grade, although I don't remember much, I remember her being very nice and understanding (which a lot of teachers haven't been when learning about my social anxiety) and my most recent teacher (would still have her as a teacher if I wasn't too sick to go to school) is honestly just amazing. I told her about my anxiety and my depression because on my worst days it kept me from goin to school. I also told her about an issue I had with my arm, I couldn't use it (for drawing, cutting fabric etc) for more than maybe 20 minutes before I would need a 5 minute break... adter talking with her, she would sometimes come over to me and ask me if I didn't need a break for my arm yet, that I should go outside and enjoy the nice weather, that I shouldn't do too much and that, if needed, she could help me cut the fabric or help me with whatever I was doing, if it meant that I would give my arm a break.. if I had bad days depression wise, but still made it to school, I would tell her and she always told me that if I needed to go home, all I had to do was tell her and most times she wouldn't even write me down as absent. Knowing that she was so understanding and willing to help really helped me go to school, even on days when I felt like I couldn't do it.. It's awesome that there are some teachers out there that treat their students that way, but it's a shame that there are so few of them. Another old teacher of mine once told me (because of the same issue with my arm) that if I couldn't do anything at school I shouldn't come at all. She blamed me for a physical pain in my arm that I had no control over... and the issued was never that I couldn't do anything. I just needed breaks. Lots of small breaks. But I could still do what I was supposed to, it just took a little longer...
AlienMissy 483 wow that teacher sounds so amazing, we definitely need more teachers like her in the system because a ton of people would benefit of that 100%
I wasn't popular at school, bullied even sometimes, but I loved going to school and I can't fathom how people hate it so much. My sister does, and she used to be popular too, and even then she hated going with a passion. Such a passion that she doesn't go anymore because she had panic attacks and got a permission to not attend. I don't understand it at all and her breakdown and aftermath, that's still here by the way and we all have to be cautious about everything we say to her, was huge and seemingly for no reason at all.
"How did you find nice things to write about 130 teemagers?" This ticked me off. Read it and you'll see why, not all teens are a pain or a nuisance and the fact that people assumed this was hard because they are teens, seriously?! And they wonder why we feel so hurt all the time
like detention, slip in sign my name on the sheet and slip out the door lmfao..... i had about 210-20 outstanding detention periods by the time i dropped out in grade 10. i might as well of not even shown up too school.
I’ve heard comments teens have received about their mental health. “Stop being a drama queen - everyone knows you’re just doing it for attention” from a sister. “Just get up and try harder because obviously you’re not trying hard enough” from a dad. “Can’t you just eat better and sleep more and be happier?” from a best friend. These are the voices we hear in our heads when we think about ending everything. This is what makes us think we’re no good and no one will miss us. Maybe you didn’t mean to say it like that, but we didn’t mean to feel this way either.
I really wish there were more people like this. Maybe it would prevent my attempt. I spent 7 months trying to speak to my school counsellor, she kept telling me to seek help outside of school. I cant afford it. She wouldn’t even call me in, when i asked she just said i wasnt a priority. I tried speaking out to my parents, my cousins, my friends, no one listened. People need to stop thinking that our problems aren’t real just because we’re young.
I'm so sorry that's been your experience. Every person matters, and it's horrible when people forget this. I know what it's like to be going through horrible circumstances and not be heard. Spent 11 years of my childhood that way and every year since, having to allow God to heal me from it. Please know that your life has immense value to it, everyone's does. When people ignore your pleas, remember this: everyone has a purpose, there are good things in store for you that you won't otherwise see if you were to give up. It's hard, I've had many trails in life that left me on my knees, balling my eyes out every night, and I was suicical myself when I was younger. But we have to remember that our worth is not determined by other people's reactions to us. Our worth and purpose is there from birth and no one can take that away. Thank you for your vulnerability. It may seem scary, but it's actually a great strength.
Dang, I wish I had a teacher like this. When I told my math teacher I hadn't finished my homework because I didn't plan on being alive that day, all she said was "well, it's getting a zero then". Yikes
In 11th grade my friend and I had AP English Composition and he didn’t do well on a two timed essays. He had a lot going on so he wasn’t focused on school. He had insomnia, depression, and one of our close friends tried to commit suicide. And the teacher said “I recommend you drop out of this class. I had depression and still passed all of my 10 AP classes in high school.” So he dropped her class. He felt he wasn’t smart enough. If she had encouraged him I believe he would’ve done much better because he is a very good student. Instead she just made him feel like a failure.
One of my teachers told me there is nothing a teen should be stressing over to drive them to depression or suicide. Im sorry i have to deal with family issues, friend issues and personal issues all while keeping my grades up playing sports and being on student council. And no I’m not saying i have it the worst I definitely do not, just please don’t tell me i got it easy and have nothing to worry about when i feel as i have the world on my shoulders.
At my school we never talk about these things, but we talk about bullying (which is a extremely serious and important issue) all year but no one ever talked about these things. If we do or if we are suicidal you get rumors or jokes about you. No one at my schools actually shows to care about these things and I have no idea why...
Jane Doe my schools only care once it’s too late- when someone’s already passed on. Even then we only get one assembly telling us to seek help then nothing... nothing at all
Jane Doe same here. A lot of the counseling teachers are teaching the dangerous of bullying, but none of the students (in my class atleast) taking it seriously. I mean they're still harrassing others. It's a joke they said but my friend couldn't take it and broke down. It was his first bullying experience and it broke him down I wonder what his thought about my never ending bullying since kid...
But if someone actually committed suicide, everyone would suddenly be mental health advocates... I hate the stigma against mental illness. No one cares until it’s too late
Something people need to understand: Maybe it is because of hormones. Maybe it is "just a phase." Maybe it is "all in your head." That doesn't mean it's not valid. That doesn't mean we don't need help.
That is the truest definition of fine I have ever seen. Every time someone asks me if I'm fine, I respond with, "I'm fine," or, "I'm never OK." (I normally use that last one as a joke) But I'm never fine.
@@smallwet I get you want people to get help but just because someone bottles up their feelings doesn't mean they don't have depression. Also if you have depression it can you feel like hopeless i.e like help won't work anyways or No one can fix me I'm to broken.
@@smallwet thanks you have a very muture reply unlike other people when I give another perspective on any situation. I have gone through it I told people after 2 weeks, but no one believed it was depression they gave other reasons. That's why bottled it up I was told that it's not depression or your fine. I am okay now I have help buy it was hard it first. I felt like no one cared about and nothing could fix me . I think you good person trying to get people not to bottled up their feelings because it hurts bottling it up.
This is my English teacher for the fall semester of the 2018-19 school year. She is absolutely amazing and so supportive and caring of her students. I love her so much.
There are different types of depression. There's depression that makes you withdraw from your friend groups, make you try less hard, what people point at when people say depression. And then there's smiling depression. This, of course, is the most dangerous kind. You smile, but you don't smile inside. No one suspects a thing. And then it's too late.
Harriet Thorpe I believe it is subjective, really. It depends on the teacher, and if not writing letters, maybe we could encourage other ways for students to open up to teachers. Education still requires a lot of innovative changes. The basic idea is to reach out to as many people as possible.....Thanks for the concern.😊
you realize making it compulsory is the same problem with teachers required by law to ask if you're being bullied or feeling suicidal? it sends the message they do not care but do so ONLY because they're forced to.
My sophomore creative writing teacher was the first one to notice I needed help. After I had been writing really sad gloomy things and when I wrote a poem about self-harm she asked me to stay after class. When she asked me if I was okay I started crying because that was the first time someone had asked me that genuinely and not just as something casual. After that I started visiting with the school psychologist and I learned for the first time about anxiety and depression. If it wasn't for her I don't know if I would have ever gotten help. It's been nine years and I'm actively going to therapy and taking medication and it all stems back to one amazing caring teacher.
I wish my teachers in high school knew I was suicidal and I wish my professors in college knew too. I had a few counseling sessions but they only made me feel worse so I stopped. I’m hopeful to see the outcome of my life and see how far I go and succeed. I’m currently and the end of my junior year of college.
Sam you are already unstoppable. You made it this far!! Keep pushing! My daughter was suicidal and that was a wake up call for me. I listened and constantly reassured her that I love her and I also got her help. Every small change, I ask that hard question because a life without here wouldn't be a life at all for me. She is a lot better and whenever she has her lows I am right there with her every step of the way!!!! Im rooting for you!!!!! Once again you are already unstoppable in my eyes!!!!!!! You got this!!!!
@@sherikamickens5652 If only a lot of parents can be like that yeah. Cry a lot? You are just exaggarating it. Gone quiet? You should talk more. Umm, mom and dad, what should I do exactly?
I personally find it harder to have suicidal thoughts when I have unfinished plans. Basically, I try my best to surround myself with people I have fun with and do things that are fun so that they don’t stress me out and that I would go, ‘maybe after tomorrow’ when I think about jumping. Procrastination is good for one thing, I suppose.
I wish my school could see this video. I’m here bc a kid tried kill himself in the bathroom at my school today. he was 14. It was completely haunting to be at school all day not knowing if he was even alive or not, and all I could think to myself was “why am I not surprised?” edit: unfortunately the kid passed away earlier today and I’m so devastated. he will never get to experience his future and he will never get to grow up and have kids and be happy again. I wish god would’ve given him another chance, but I know that he is at peace now. rest in peace jesse 2004-2019
Ms. Darras sounds like she would be a great therapist. Sadly, I know no teachers at my school that would allow one to vent to them about how they feel, if they are depressed, suicidal, etc. My school has gotten rid of school therapists because of money issues, and solely rely on guidance counselors to better ones school career. They did not consider bringing therapists back. The students had to write in the school newspaper that they were essential to a students mental health.
EATshitanddrinkbleac It takes courage to talk to people about your problems because you may think “well they don’t care, I just won’t say anything” it’s better for students to talk and let their feelings out.
Suicide is an issue that most people are afraid to accept. Even the early signs of depression is already a term that most people don't want to mention or bring up as if it is something that is bad. Most people that are depressed thinks that no one understands or love them. The first and important part of prevention is showing love and kindness. Even if it starts at school a lot of kids find that most teachers are someone who they can go to for advice. Love that comes from a family or people you admire is always someone that can make a difference. There are always teachers and peers who will listen its just a matter of asking for the help and guidance that is needed.
@@zakshei6967 I’m still here! and I plan on still being here for many more years to come. Things are still hard sometimes, but I’m lucky to be in a place where I’m pretty happy with this little life I have. thanks for checking in, thats kind of you
That's not true. There are many of us who care this deeply. I only wish there were more. It kills me to think of the sadness that students suffer from some times or how they feel alone. There's not enough teachers to go around, I agree with that. So I make it a point to empower my students, to tell them that they are the first line of defense and that they might notice a difference in another student before I will. They need to tell me right away if there's anything they suspect so that I can get involved too. I also frequently lecture my classes on what it means to be kind to one another, and how it feels to have someone say something that's hurtful, even if it was said in a "joking" way. I promise you though there are teachers out there like her and like me that would give up their lives to protect their students. I just hope you find one. 💜
"Just because they're failing doesn't mean they are a failure." I don't know why but I started crying even harder at this line and I think it triggers something in me that has to do with my academic performance and such
Western school systems need to change drastically, followed by higher education. My life without school is more enjoyable and I can finally start to go off my antidepressants. Humans were not meant to be in school from 8-3 and then do 3 hours of homework every night. You have one life, do not let it be wasted by chasing something that society has told you is necessary. It is important to be educated, but the added stress and pressure is why kids hate school. Once out of school, I find myself learning more about the world than I have for the 19 years I have spent in the education system. After my degree I am done being told what I should be doing with my life.
If you think western schools and societies are the only ones suffering from this epidemic you’d be very very wrong. Japan and Korea are tied for having the highest teen suicide population, there is no single cultural or systemic value that is contributing to this trend of suicide rates for all we know it could be in the food we eat, it’s such an unexplainable topic that no one answer fits.
I'm a teacher too and this is wonderful. I used to make my students collages with photos of them taken through their years in middle school. connection is the most important and seeing them for the brilliant young people they are is invaluable too. a good teacher exemplifies "Children are born with wings, teachers help them to fly." keep it up!
Perfectionism, no boundaries (puting others first to the extreme), always being extra nice. Basically all the things the teacher said about her student are things I have seen in every suicidal person I know. Not to alarm anyone, the key is the motivation ¿is hardworking perfectionism or is never feeling enough? ¿ is being selfless or is being unable to care for themselves? ¿ is just being smiley or is being constantly scared of rejection? Sorry for the broken english and thanks for the great talk
This is a great talk but I’ve also noticed that teachers don’t care unless you’re suicidal, I’ve struggled with depression for a long time and it’s not unlikely for me to have days where my pain is so unbearable I just wanna lay down and sleep so I don’t have to feel it. Mental health is never a viable excuse to miss school but being sad, having anxiety, that’s all something worth being bullied over. We are forced to go to school even if we’d give anything to just go back to bed. Depression is an illness that people not only ignore but underestimate in levels of pain. I appreciate what she has said so much and what she did. I have teachers who know about my struggles and are nice and caring but that doesn’t lessen the pain
I agree. Why does the concern rise only when a person is suicidal? Do they not care if we're happy or not? No one deserves to live like that. From experience, I learnt living like that is liking dying everyday.
All teachers need to see this. I've had teachers that watched a certain few students take a thumbtack out of the wall and scratch their skin with it. And do absolutely nothing about it. And that is NOT okay.
I truly admire her for what she has done and doing for her students. I can see her passionate toward everybody in her speech. You are an angel. Bearing in mind that she is like everybody else who may also have difficulties in her life but she doesn’t used them as excuses to flare up people’s feelings. I wished I had a teacher like you. I always thought subconsciously that I was a failure. Not even my parents told me once that I am able to live with myself and have a better life in the future. It took me two decades to realise that what I was told or felt, was not true. I went to university when I was 35 and graduated from London University with first degree in Film and then started my career in TV industry in the age of 39. Although that I’m too old for many other things that I wish I did when I was younger, I have realistically succeeded in things that I wanted in these few years. Human brain has its own capacity and limit when reaches these ages. It’s not rewiring as much as it used to. I’m still struggling with those many years of negative experiences and thoughts carried on since that crucial times. It could have been much easier if I had someone showed me or reminded me that I was special.
I started crying over this because i know that ill walk into school tomorrow and it'll still be like a torture chamber. Ill do what i do everyday, hold in panic attacks and let it out when i get home, draw my life away so i don't have to make eye contact and last of this vague list, ill put other over myself so much that i don't care for myself at all
I have to do so too tommorow over that i have an exam for which i have not been studying properly . Because apparently my brain isnt able to concentrate anymore . I am freaked out . Over that i had a parents teacher meeting and i had terrible remarks , my teacher wants to talk to me . I already wanna kill my self . I am shaking .
In my opinion, I feel like School is the problem or at least high school. I think most students who commit suicide are in high and it’s the fact that it’s pretty pointless. Your putting in all these extra hours to learn stuff that ur never gonna use in life and for what. A letter A on a peice of paper every 6 weeks or so. School should end around 8th or 9th grade and a high education should be optional just like college
carl sagan once spoke about this, the younger you talk to children the more excited they are to learn. but "something" changes in the higher grades. and really it's because kids arent learning. they're being trained to memorize facts and dates
I had a teacher who noticed I was depressed and cutting my self, she found a sub for all her classes and spent 2 days with me just sitting and talking with me and then spent time with me after every school day. I've never forgotten her kindness and I'm still here.
I’m 15 and I’ve been thinking about suicide since I was 9 years old. I’ve made it this far but I haven’t had help, I’m clinging onto life by the barest strands of hope. I feel selfish that no matter what I do I’m unhappy, lazy, tired, unmotivated, suicidal, stressed, whatever. All of it. I live an easy privileged life by all accounts but it doesn’t seem to matter. My passions: drawing, animals, biology, writing... they make me feel better, but sometimes it’s like they mean nothing to me. I’m not diagnosed with depression. I’m scared if I asked my parents for help I would cause them undue stress, or they’d send me to a religious counselor. I don’t even know why I’m writing this. Maybe because I want people to understand that it can happen to anyone.
"When we treat others Merely AS THEY ARE, they will remain as they are. When we treat them as if they are what they should be, they Will BECOME what they should be." - T. S. Monson That has to be one of the most, and my favorite quotes of all time. And I'll just let it speak for itself. Also really enjoyed this talk, it's seriously something we All need to hear no matter who we are or where we came from. The most important thing we could ever give to another is Love. May we all keep this message within our hearts until the end of time. 💓 💓 💓
I have no idea who this woman is personally or how good of a teacher she is but this honestly meant so much to me. I struggle I have friends that struggle and when I was in year 4 I had this wonderful teacher who everyone thought he was a bit weird but we learnt so much from him and his criticism was never hurtful but encouraging like for example, If you can improve on your spelling for next week you will find in no time you will create wonderful story’s without one mistake. Those small differences to his speech made everyone’s day fill with hope, and that was special. Never have I ever met another teacher that was like him and even today I’m not the best speller but his words in my head motivate me to practice and be better. That is what makes a teacher special.
Very moving! All people need to know someone cares. These kids spend their lives on social media where people always put the best on show not realizing all people have struggles and challenges in life. They don't need to compare themselves. Teachers spend so much time with our kids, we need more brave educators to care!
My mum is a high school teacher and she's one of the few who cares about her students' emotions. She doesn't care so much about the grades and she always supports them. They are happy. Teachers like my mum are so rare but they're needed more than ever
I'm Grace. I'm 9 years old and I still think nobody likes me. My friends always run away from me and I feel like there is something wrong with me. I'm still standing up for myself now by telling them that I am the same as them. Gender doesn't matter, personality doesn't matter, equality does. Your absolutely right! Now I'm in year 5 and people come up to me to ask if I'm alright because of some of my struggles at home. The struggles that I have don't put me down, I stand up for myself. At 1st I thought I didn't belong in the world but I realised that my equality could change. Please stand up for yourself. No matter what you are like, you are equal to everybody else. :)
People sometimes think that teenagers with depression just have hormonal changes, especially children, like even at 8 some become depressed (like me) *Like seriously parents step your game up* Edit: OK HOW DO I HAVE SO MUCH LIKES
Someone in the crowd is going to go home, ask their child directly if they’re ok and or is they’re feeling depressed and such. Some children will open up while others like me will shut it down. Then those parents will forget and when that child comes to them, it’ll be a closed conversation....
but what if your homeschooled and your parents are your teachers? what if you don't really have friends you feel comfortable talking about, what if you cant talk to your parents because of theyre a large part of the reason why you're having these suicidal thoughts? There's no teacher to turn to. There's no friend who could help in your time of need. There's no school counselor. There's just you. And only you. You think About how little they care, and how they wouldn't miss you, that they'd cheer or have parties to celebrate. you cry alone in your bathroom until 3 AM and the only comfort being your dog. You think long and hard about how you want to die. You think that you should pick up that knife and harm yourself, or just end it all. The minute you start feeling happy you immediately tell yourself you don't deserve it, you don't deserve happiness. And when you start feeling better, you miss it. You miss the crying, you miss the feeling of hopelessness, you miss feeling like everyone hated you. There was something weirdly comforting about it. You don't have suicidal thoughts anymore but you feel as if you should, like your doing something wrong and you need to be punished but you're too scared to even touch the knife anymore. You make jokes to cope with the pain, jokes such as "Sorry I cant i have crippling depression" "lol wish I was dead" But its true and its a cry for help that no one will listen to and you know nobody will listen and that's why you do it because if you told them that you really did have depression, that you really did wish you were dead, they get uncomfortable and leave and you don't want to deal with loss again because it hurts and you dont want to get hurt anymore. You don't want to talk to your friends because you just feel like a burden, you feel like you've relied on them too much and they're starting to hate you, that they purposefully flake out on plans and avoid you because your just so insufferable. You hate making new friends because you get too comfortable with them and your weird sense of humor shows and it makes everyone uncomfortable, which makes you feel awful. You wish you could get as far away from your family as possible but at the same time, you never want to leave because deep down you care too much about them to even seriously think about leaving. You don't talk to them about the parts that aren't their fault because they wouldn't help. They couldn't help, why would they? Especially when you work up the courage to finally take that step towards getting better, to tell them that you're depressed, but you don't tell them why because you're scared. there are promises of help, therapy, Hugs, comfort. It would have hurt less to just hear them say therapy wasn't a good idea, that they couldn't afford it or didn't feel like it was worth the money. Instead they gave you false hope where you waited and waited for days and weeks and months for this promised help that never came and in the end, you start making reasons about why. Were your problems not bad enough? did they stop caring, do they love you anymore? Did they think it would have been a waste? You decide to believe that they just didn't take it seriously. that they felt like you were just going through a rough patch and it hurt so bad to feel as if they thought your feeling and problems was just a phase. Tell me, what do you do in that situation.
I don't have the answers, but what I do know is that you aren't a burden, that you would be missed, and that you deserve to be listened to and helped. You aren't a waste of life and the future holds so many amazing things for you, as you deserve so much better than your current situation. There are often free therapy-like things online that can be good resources to help if you don't have anywhere else to turn. Sending love.
Sounds like you need better friends who love you enough to want to understand how to help you, how to listen. If I were you, I would try to reach out to another family member who isn’t really part of the reason why you feel this way. It might help with the fear of the why. Therapy is definitely a good idea, but it’s also good to have a support group. Keep being around your dog, ( dogs are better than people sometimes) and find some outlet. Whatever it is, you need to let it out somehow. You deserve to be happy. Please don’t believe otherwise. You deserve to know that you are loved, and that will never change. You are a precious human life, no matter how many times you tell yourself you’re worthless. Personally, I think that a weird sense of humor is the best kind. And as far as explaining how you feel to your family, try to write it down first. Writing can help you put more thought into what you’re trying to say, and hopefully in a way they can understand. I hope you’re doing better these days. ❤️
This is by far the best ted talk I’ve heard in a while. I attempted suicide a little more than 6 months ago, and it was my high school teacher who kept me going. Her voice in the back of my head told me to call 911, and that’s the reason I was saved. I trust this teacher more than anyone else. Teachers make such a difference in this world.
I am in college to be a teacher. I made my first suicide attempt at age 16. I hope and pray that I am able to spot a suicidal child. Thank you for this video.
I remember this year (grade 10), I transferred to a new school, I came from a very poor school (basically a scam) to a completely new world (it was like any other school but not a scam), I didn't know what to do... I got mental breakdown from September to March. I recall sleeping 2 to 3 hours a day, cry every day, depressed 24/7, I had no friends and lost confidence in myself. There were teachers who embarrassed me in front of the whole class. I did everything I could. Time limits, Stress, no motivation or support, feeling of hatred, made me stop studying. It became worse... I brought low marks in term 1 and cried endlessly, I remember not doing my homeworks due to unintentionally 15 hour nap (from returning back to school to next day of school) and be hella stressed for not doing the assignment, the teacher had literally embarrassed me in front of everyone and didn't accepted my excuse, not only that but also I did an assignment but forgot it at home, she didn't believe me and demanded me to come with her to the principal. I got sick and was contacted with some sort of virus twice twice. The first time I remember the coldness and can't move, dizzy and just unable to do anything. The second time was worse, I got acnes and pimples covering my body, (it happenened suddenly next day at morning), I had the worse migraine anyone could imagine and was determined that I was going to die any moment. Days later after I skipped tests and school and was unable to move, no one asked. And one teacher suspected me not doing the homework. This whole year, I cut my arm with knife, entered a state no one could imagined and tried hard but didn't succeed, failed attempts of wanting to sucide multiple times, no one literally cared. Until... now. You can't imagine.... just imagine how this corona virus appearing made lock downs, made me bring back to my normal state (after 20 days) I feel alot happier, right now it is 11:23am and I have classes but I'm skipping them all. (starts from 8am till 2:30pm) I even have a test on 12:45pm But you know what? Health is more valuable than anything else. Trust me this education system is totally Wrong. Basically people are determined that: Study hard = Success = ily Don't study hard= Failure= I hate you. And why I said that "love or hate" is because teachers, students and everyone is completely biased. My story is long and I can't type furthermore but remember... no one will really care for you, everyone cares about what they will get. Remember, if u got successful one day, look at how people will treat you differently and how many will come to you. Sorry English is not my first language.
"They need LOVE and SUPORT and to know that someone CARES" world needs more people like her imagine a teacher writing personalized messages for each and every student, she is giving them support and reassurance and courage and that is what teachers should do, not force students to do something but give them strength and confidence to do it with their own will. People can learn so much from her
Teachers like her are what have helped me in my roughest patches in life. Beginning of my freshman year of high school I was not doing well mentally. I was facing rejection from things I was passionate about, and I just felt lonely. I was slowly giving up and losing hope in things that used to excited me and motivate me. Nobody really looked deep into it, thought that I was just having a rough day, week, month. One day, one of my teachers at the time pulled me before going to lunch and sat down with me. She said how she noticed that I wasn't as active and outgoing as I used to be. That my light just slowly dimmed. I was reluctant to say anything since I was used to bottling things up because I thought that no one would listen, that my voice won't be heard. I was weirded out why a teacher was interested in my well-being outside of the classroom to be blunt. Even if I started talking about it, what would she even do to make things better anyways? Why me? She sat there until I finally said something. I was finally heard by somebody. And she actually tried to help, and listened deeply to my frustrations. She was the reason I finally got help. To this day I still have teachers that reach out to me if they notice me struggling. Those teachers hold a special place in my heart. I still am fighting the good fight, especially right now. But if it weren't for my teachers going beyond what the job requirements are for students' needs, I don't know where I would be today to be totally honest. But now I don't have to. I am beyond thankful for them. Every kid deserves to be noticed and to receive compassion. Even if it means an email, or a note of encouragement. Thank you teachers. Shout out to Mrs. Fischer, Ms. Ward, Mrs. Slattery, and Mrs. Robrahn!
Today I told my physics teacher that all of us suffer from enormous stress and anxiety because of school and the pressure to receive good grades. He simply said "No" Like what
I wish this was my teacher wth She's an amazing teacher, no joke. I love that she finds a positive in everyone, and that she actually spent her time to a student in a mental hospital. That was really sweet of her
I'm struggling really hard with major depression, and generalized anxiety, and my teachers do know that I need more help than others because I struggle with my self alot more because of the thoughts in my head and the feelings in my chest, heart, and body. But that teacher, I freaking love her. She's so right. Most days I just need someone to show me some care, love, guidance, kindness, and encouragement. It really helps make me feel like all my efforts are worth it and encourge me to keep beliving in my self. and tell me all the great things they see in my self, and that would already help me alot. She's definitely on the right path of helping people survive!!
"Just because they're failing doesn't mean they are a failure" I started crying hearing this
Same
I wish someone would say that to me and really meant it
@@morimori7456 You failing doesn't make you a failure! Keep up your effort and good luck!
Ps: yes, I really mean that
@@mycabbages8228 really?
even though I'm practically useless at everything but drawing?
@@morimori7456 Why not? Do you think I have nothing better to do than to give people false hope? Nah, I'm too nice a guy (exept that I'm a nihilistic cynic most of the time).
Btw being good at drawing requires a lot of motoric, visual memory and creative skills (which I definitely lack) so don't sell yourself so short.
"These kids are not robots. They are human beings with human emotions, and feelings."
Sadly it seems like very few teachers actually understand this.
I found this comment right as she started to say it
Some teachers actually do understand this, but they are required to do what the education system tells them to do for a living. And this is coming from a middle schooler.
They are supposed to teach you not baby you. Very simple. They are not friends they are not colleagues they are teachers they have one job and that is to teach. It is not the fault of the teacher if you do not feel personally motivated to do the work or to learn the subject matter.
@@neghersteinpeepee2196 Yes they're supposed to teach you, but they're also supposed to help you learn, and be a caring and supportive role model. If you can't feel motivated to do anything, let alone learn, a teacher is also supposed to help you move on. They aren't supposed to be robots incapable of human emotion. They're supposed to be role models who can help you if you're going through something rough.
@@Lindwyrm6429 of course because thats their job.
If us teens actually were listened to maybe it would change. When we tell you ‘I’m stressed out I’m not coping’ the words ‘ooh wait until you get to my age’ won’t help. When we say ‘I’m sad’ we don’t want ‘ahh cheer up your only young’. We tell you this, we try and try to tell you but adults sometimes just can’t and won’t listen. No one understands
Yep! 100% correct
*you’re
I had planned my suicide and almost tried to attempt several times. I got sent to a mental hospital
"Stop being ungrateful, we had it worse back then"
It’s that cell phone isn’t it
Smiling depression is one of the most dangerous kinds. No one sees the signs until it is too late because to others there are no warning signs. It is so easily missed and that type of depression is the kind that I have. No one sees it and I don’t have the heart to tell anyone and it haunts me.
Glittergal101 I know exactly how you feel, a smile hides the darkest thoughts
Yeah...
@Sea_Pea_Kay_ _ *hugs you*
It is hard for people to help. If they arent in your friend group, it is hard to get you in a conversation about this topic. It is not that hard to see though. The quote: "The eyes are the window to the soul." Is more than accurate. In this case as well, yours eyes will tell. Your face may smile, but the sadness in the eyes will not disappear.
I haven't smiled for 9 years straight (IRL)
it's not a problem with my face
no not a disease
no I don't want to say why
I just can't
so no one really asks me if I'm happy today or not
"her face is like that, she doesn't have emotions"
it makes me want to cry every night
The world needs more people like her.
Too right.
Alot more, infact wtf?, we all need to be like this, we must be
Agreed.
I agree, but hear me out.
I have parents who would abuse if they were told by the school. What should I do?
Agreed
My brother tried telling my mom about his anxiety. She told him to "man up and deal with it".
And she wonders why I never tell her anything.
Me but with my dad
That's me right there!
yup, i told my mom i was struggling with anxiety and depression and she told me i was over thinking it.
i told my mom i was suicidal and she told me to "just kill yourself then lol"... then when i ended up in the hospital she acted really shocked
@@carotlover69
Wtf😶
It pisses me off that there's usually no signs and all my signs were completely ignored until I almost died. It just makes me think how many people are going through it all alone
Thank you for still being here :)
stay alive
I told my family about my issues and they did nothing about it until I had to be hospitalized for a suicide attempt
I get it I suffer from depression and all my signs were outside of school.
what were the signs that were ignored? we are not mind readers. you explaining these signs could help us help hundreds of thousands of kids with depression and suicidal thoughts. no one is ever alone unless they choose to be.
My fourth grade teacher set up a system where if I stayed organized and on task all day, he would sit with me one on one for 5 minutes after school, just talking or playing his guitar. I have learning disabilities that make organization really hard, but just knowing I would get to spend time with him after school made me work harder. I'm now 41 years old and I still remember the songs he used to sing me during those times. I went back to my grade school years ago to see if he was still there; he was, and he remembered me. Good teachers are magical.
I have learning disabilities, too. I never had someone that devoted to me, all teachers brushed me aside.
true,, good teachers are a rare gem
You just made me cry that’s so sweet
“Oh but it’s just a phase!”
“You’ll get over it”
“Just talk about it and it will get better”
“ only you can control your feelings”
“Every teenager feels like that”
“You’re just attention seeking”
“You’re just feeling sad today, you will feel better tomorrow”
Those few phrases are what make us not want to get help because sadly most adults say that or even our own peers. Maybe if people understood mental health better this wouldn’t be happening
I completely agree with you.
But also when you finally work up the courage after all the criticism, to try and get better they mock and judge us for trying to get better, saying things like "attention seekers" and "someone has it worse than you stop pretending."
Fact
@Faith The angel
I feel you :(
My Name Is Weird finally someone who gets me x
"It's the hormones" they say..
"It's all fine" they say..
"It's gonna pass" they say..
But is it?
How we feel is all we can feel and nothing else can stop that. We let our feelings get the best of us and sometimes.. well most of the time.. it hurts us. It kills us. We feel and see what we want to see and feel. It's within our minds that hurt us. We can't help it. As someone who is still going through depression and has attempted suicide, I can say that I don't want to die. I just want to end the pain. It's killing me. It's surrounding me and darkening my life. That's what I see and feel. I can't stop it. It's who I am. Will it end? Maybe. But when will it? I don't know. Maybe soon or.. maybe never
^ this
Parents sometimes: “it’s that damn phone”
It does get better in time. Though knowing that won’t fix the pain right now... it will get better. Truly.
The reason for depression is clear to me like nothing else and i know it, because i went trough it and still do it at times.
Its the craving to be loved.
To me, love is not an emotion, it is the only thing that matters. Nothing can compare to it, everything else falls utterly short in comparison. What does anything really matter without it. Its like dust. Its useless.
So when it is felt, that there is no love, life step by step becomes darker and meaningless and eventually will lead to suicide.
Because no person and im sure of it can live without it.
That is why such a letter that this teacher has written is of such an importance, because it shows that you are important and that you are needed.
I feel you
in 7th grade i once wrote a suicide note in class and tore it up by the end of class only to have someone find it and give it to the teacher who gave it to the principal, so i had to sit in the principals office with him and my teacher and my abusive mother all demanding to know why on earth i would want to kill myself.
transgirltalks I'm really sorry.. You can get through this! You're not alone!
Stay strong 💪
It sucks when the people that hurt you the most wonder why your so sad.
spidermanfan my mom yells at me if I even bring up the word suicide
Billie’s Eyelash tell her to yell at your corpse then
I find intresting how adults say "it only gets worse enjoy it while you a still can" but expect us just live with knowing the future sucks more than the present, Knowing we are working so hard for it to only get worse . That gives us no hope. Then when we try to "enjoy it while it lasts" we are told to work giving us little time for fun. People wonder why mental health is so bad it's because of our bad aditude towards life or the future
YES!! my parents do this all the time. They always say, oh just wait life gets WAY more difficult. That doesnt help me bruh. If any parent is reading DO NOT SAY THAT PLEASE. it hurts knowing that if u are struggling so much right now that it only gets harder. Even if that's true WE DKNT NEED TO HEAR THAT. we want to hope it gets better. I hope anyone reading this just knows, you are loved and appreciated, I promise 💕
I absolutely hate when people say that. It's like, "seriously? Well, if it's just going to go downhill from here when I'm already at the bottom, I honestly don't see a point in staying for it."
@@lieselbrehmer ikr it didn't help me a already suicidal kid to know life's just sucks. It made it easier for me to think that was an option. Honestly life can be what you make it for the most part. Control what can to make your life the happiest it can be.try not to sweat the stuff you can't. Honestly we need a better outlook towards the future. If we focus on the positives instead of constantly highlighting the negatives we be much better of societally. Tha being said it ok to be negative at times.
I wish people understood how passionate she is about her students. On our way home from the talk, she expressed to me how heartbroken she was about her student committing suicide and how it changed her perspective completely. She truly cares about her kids in the classroom and outside of the classroom. It is so unbelievably rare to come across that.
Lauren Margaret I wish she was my teacher in high school!
I understand. I wish more people did. Or more people speak up for suicidal people
I am 14 I have been suicidal for a few months and when I starting getting these thought my science teacher did the same thing as you. He wrote individual notes to all 140 of his students. I have a bulletin board in my bedroom and I keep it up there and read it when I am in the darkest times. It doesn’t always make me feel better but my teacher is the nicest guy with the biggest heart
ɬɧɛ ᏚᎪᏙᎪᏩᎬ stay strong and stay alive 💞
Hey, I'm proud of you for pushing through whatever it may be you are struggling with. I hope you know you are loved and appreciated. Even though I dont know you, I hope you have a fun rest of your high school experience and after that a fun lifetime. You can do this :) 💕
Wholesome 100
I love when people say super nice thing about people AFTER they are dead or tried to kill them selves.
Taylor Garness Just another symptom of the superficial pity society gives to those they know they’re guilty of failing. I know the feeling, it’s human nature not to recognize the damage until after it’s done.
Exactly. I’ve been to the funeral of a kid who killed themself and over and over I kept hearing the phrase “if only they’d asked for help” or “this could have been prevented if they just told somebody” but as someone who has attempted before, I know that they often do. I told my friends. I told my therapist. I told my parents. I told everyone I trusted how I felt. And you know what they said? “You just want attention” “anyone who actually feels that way would never tell anybody” or simply “so?”. These were the same people who made such friendly comments and wished to help after it was too late for my friend, they vowed to look for signs and never let it happen again. But in the end GGyourdead is exactly right. It’s human nature not to recognize the damage until after it’s done.
GGyourdead That’s why I wonder if killing myself is the only way out... Either I die and don’t have to worry about it or I live and get the help I need but I think I’m too much of a coward to try it
The way i see it, you are too brave not to try it, if you are talking about committing suicide
Someone dies
50%: *Says something nice*
49%: "he/she was a threat anyways"
1%: "I need to find a way to increase my life span"
"Just because they are failing, doesn't mean they are a failure". Schools and parents need to recognize this more
It is not just about suicide. I often feel like my depression isn't taken seriously because I'm not suicidal. I have depression, I struggle every day. My life may not be at danger, but my future. I would never harm myself, I know myself well enough to be able to tell that, but that doesn't mean that I don't struggel to get up in the morning and leave the house, that doesn't mean I don't spiral into the void of thoughts and fears all the time, that doesn't mean I don't lose joy in the things I do, that doesn't mean I don't hate myself. I know I deserve better but I still blame myself for not getting better, I still blame myself for not being able to do what everyone else seems to be able to do.
The people around me, my family, my friends, even my therapist seem to think that it's not serious but it is. Even though I don't want to end it, I hate my life. I get little support and little understanding.
I hear you, and I could have written your words myself. 99% of the time when I'm depressed I'm not suicidal. But that doesn't mean it doesn't take a toll, on everything, especially my participation in life. "My life may not be at danger, but my future", you hit the nail right on the head. For what it's worth, I understand.
Herr Hurbig i harm with depression
Are you ok?
Herr Hurbig
Here for u
"you're to young to be depressed"
Or
"it's just your teen hormones"
Wow thanks, Happiness increases by - 10
Desdemona Horiona too*
Happiness increases by -10. My life
:):
@@willsolace3966 You are WORTH IT!!
What school she teaches at, im transferring.
Jackson Richardson in the description
Jackson Richardson same oml
Jackson Richardson same
I wish I could have been taught by her.
I could actually go to her school. I'm in Colorado
I live in Hong Kong, and there is a ridiculous amount of academic pressure on students over here. This is such a great ted talk I think teachers everywhere should learn from it.
Evelyn M I live in hk too. Too much pressure on students for the DSE
I live in HK too
I cried while watching this. God I wish I had a teacher like this
Don't we all
It made me tear up a little
Same here
Same.
Me too, I want a teacher like her
A few days ago I was about to walk into class but my teacher stopped me and said to me, "Hey, have you been doing okay? I've noticed you've been down and quiet lately." I smiled at her and said, "I'm fine, thank you!" It was a lie, but I felt so happy that she noticed and didn't think twice about it. If she some how sees this then, thank you, Ms. Kasa, thank you.. :)
If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you :) Sorry things have been tough lately
As a 15-year old who's had to stop multiple suicide attempts from multiple friends, thank you for your message and all of your efforts.
ALDC Sunshine I hope their doing okay 💜
Good for you in stopping those attempts then, as someone with depression, I would applaud for your effort in that.
You matter maybe I’m late to say this but you matter much love to you -❤️
fellow 15 year old here. Thank you so much for being there for them and for saving them. I attempted suicide, failed, and called my friend for help and she helped me. You are doing a great service to this world and your very existence is a blessing.
I'm 14,iv had a suicidal friend... It would always bring me to tears that she kept saying how much she hated her life and wanted to die ... I would always try and talk her out of it ... She's ok now but we used to talk to me about everything and lately she's turned toxic... Iv had to block her and I still worry for her ... But I'm done dealing with being used... I sort of miss her ... Anyway thank you for reading my whole little story...
School board: *sees millions of students stuggling with mental health because of pressure*
Also school board: y’all here sum?
Someone says that for depressed people even a smile or a «thank you», or maybe just a «hello, how are you?» can make a difference.
I really like the 130 individual letters!
It does! Many people with depression tend to believe that they are terrible and worthless because our minds have gone to war against us. It was hard to believe that I had any worth to the people around me so when someone showed kindness or appreciation, it was mind-blowing. It doesn't cure depression of course but it's a bright spot in the day.
Do you think you can do edgewood high school and braden middle school lol I would listen
It does. I can relate bc i am depressed
it does. it might sound weird, but simply having a small conversation with someone and asking how they are doing could turn someone’s day around. sure, it won’t end depression, but it really does help. especially when i’m in that negative headspace, it helps me to realize that people can actually care about me.
MVPever It honestly is the best part of my day when it happens. Not that it happens very often.
Mental illness affected my education so much. I was late to school. I missed many days. And all the teachers would do was call me a slacker and a failure. I don't blame them for not knowing . i refused to socialized I even cried in class a few times and bullied right in front of teachers and all they would do is call me lazy, slacker, failure, etc. It only made things worst. Even some of my facourite teachers started to turn on me. They were all I had at the time. Like I said I don't blame them. Teaching is a handful.
*hugs you*
I was lucky enough to have Ms. Darras as my teacher this last year, and she was 100% my favorite teacher of that year, and one of my 2 favorite teachers I've ever had. As a Senior, saying I only really enjoyed 2 of my teachers is insane. I hate school. Honestly, I do, with everything in me. I have an awful perception of school in my head, and I've almost never had a good experience when it comes to school. The reason I'm able to say "almost" is because of only 2 teachers, one being Darras. I dread going to school everyday, as it's always surrounded by negativity with admin and teachers putting this idea in my head that if I don't do well in school, I'm a failure and going to be a failure in life, which causes unbelievable amounts of stress on me, seeing that I don't do amazing in school. Ms. Darras and the other teacher are the only teachers who have made me feel like the opposite, and have made me WANT to come to school. They've ran the only classes I've ever been excited to attend. I hope that many other teachers follow in the steps of Darras, so that school can be enjoyable for many other kids who struggle with depression, especially when the root of the depression is school itself. And Ms. Darras if you see this, this is Andrew Baker and I just want to say I absolutely loved your class, it was absolutely amazing :D much love
I'm 24 and I have only had 2 teachers I really liked. The first one was the teacher I had from 2nd to 5th grade, although I don't remember much, I remember her being very nice and understanding (which a lot of teachers haven't been when learning about my social anxiety) and my most recent teacher (would still have her as a teacher if I wasn't too sick to go to school) is honestly just amazing. I told her about my anxiety and my depression because on my worst days it kept me from goin to school. I also told her about an issue I had with my arm, I couldn't use it (for drawing, cutting fabric etc) for more than maybe 20 minutes before I would need a 5 minute break... adter talking with her, she would sometimes come over to me and ask me if I didn't need a break for my arm yet, that I should go outside and enjoy the nice weather, that I shouldn't do too much and that, if needed, she could help me cut the fabric or help me with whatever I was doing, if it meant that I would give my arm a break.. if I had bad days depression wise, but still made it to school, I would tell her and she always told me that if I needed to go home, all I had to do was tell her and most times she wouldn't even write me down as absent. Knowing that she was so understanding and willing to help really helped me go to school, even on days when I felt like I couldn't do it..
It's awesome that there are some teachers out there that treat their students that way, but it's a shame that there are so few of them.
Another old teacher of mine once told me (because of the same issue with my arm) that if I couldn't do anything at school I shouldn't come at all. She blamed me for a physical pain in my arm that I had no control over... and the issued was never that I couldn't do anything. I just needed breaks. Lots of small breaks. But I could still do what I was supposed to, it just took a little longer...
AlienMissy 483 wow that teacher sounds so amazing, we definitely need more teachers like her in the system because a ton of people would benefit of that 100%
Plus, she's hot
I wasn't popular at school, bullied even sometimes, but I loved going to school and I can't fathom how people hate it so much. My sister does, and she used to be popular too, and even then she hated going with a passion. Such a passion that she doesn't go anymore because she had panic attacks and got a permission to not attend. I don't understand it at all and her breakdown and aftermath, that's still here by the way and we all have to be cautious about everything we say to her, was huge and seemingly for no reason at all.
yeah, i usually only have one or two teachers that i like.
"How did you find nice things to write about 130 teemagers?"
This ticked me off. Read it and you'll see why, not all teens are a pain or a nuisance and the fact that people assumed this was hard because they are teens, seriously?! And they wonder why we feel so hurt all the time
My teachers forget to call my name during attendance :(
Same
one day I was gone and no one noticed
maybe you're just the only one they remember every time and don't call your name because they already see you and know you're there :)
@@emilykunzite4153 that made me smile
like detention, slip in sign my name on the sheet and slip out the door lmfao..... i had about 210-20 outstanding detention periods by the time i dropped out in grade 10. i might as well of not even shown up too school.
I’ve heard comments teens have received about their mental health.
“Stop being a drama queen - everyone knows you’re just doing it for attention” from a sister.
“Just get up and try harder because obviously you’re not trying hard enough” from a dad.
“Can’t you just eat better and sleep more and be happier?” from a best friend.
These are the voices we hear in our heads when we think about ending everything. This is what makes us think we’re no good and no one will miss us. Maybe you didn’t mean to say it like that, but we didn’t mean to feel this way either.
I really wish there were more people like this. Maybe it would prevent my attempt. I spent 7 months trying to speak to my school counsellor, she kept telling me to seek help outside of school. I cant afford it. She wouldn’t even call me in, when i asked she just said i wasnt a priority. I tried speaking out to my parents, my cousins, my friends, no one listened. People need to stop thinking that our problems aren’t real just because we’re young.
how are you doing right now?
How are you now?
Lol Thanks for asking, I’m happier than I ever thought I deserved to be. I turned my life around. Things will get better guys, just give it time.
I am happy you're doing well, aziz :)
Everyone deserves happiness :)
I'm so sorry that's been your experience. Every person matters, and it's horrible when people forget this. I know what it's like to be going through horrible circumstances and not be heard. Spent 11 years of my childhood that way and every year since, having to allow God to heal me from it. Please know that your life has immense value to it, everyone's does. When people ignore your pleas, remember this: everyone has a purpose, there are good things in store for you that you won't otherwise see if you were to give up. It's hard, I've had many trails in life that left me on my knees, balling my eyes out every night, and I was suicical myself when I was younger. But we have to remember that our worth is not determined by other people's reactions to us. Our worth and purpose is there from birth and no one can take that away. Thank you for your vulnerability. It may seem scary, but it's actually a great strength.
Dang, I wish I had a teacher like this. When I told my math teacher I hadn't finished my homework because I didn't plan on being alive that day, all she said was "well, it's getting a zero then". Yikes
In 11th grade my friend and I had AP English Composition and he didn’t do well on a two timed essays. He had a lot going on so he wasn’t focused on school. He had insomnia, depression, and one of our close friends tried to commit suicide. And the teacher said “I recommend you drop out of this class. I had depression and still passed all of my 10 AP classes in high school.” So he dropped her class. He felt he wasn’t smart enough. If she had encouraged him I believe he would’ve done much better because he is a very good student. Instead she just made him feel like a failure.
I can say as a 13 year old. We need more of this type of teachers, They can not only do way better, But also save lives
WOW! Teacher of the year☺️
Lori Tato I know right
Teacher of the century
One of my teachers told me there is nothing a teen should be stressing over to drive them to depression or suicide.
Im sorry i have to deal with family issues, friend issues and personal issues all while keeping my grades up playing sports and being on student council. And no I’m not saying i have it the worst I definitely do not, just please don’t tell me i got it easy and have nothing to worry about when i feel as i have the world on my shoulders.
At my school we never talk about these things, but we talk about bullying (which is a extremely serious and important issue) all year but no one ever talked about these things. If we do or if we are suicidal you get rumors or jokes about you. No one at my schools actually shows to care about these things and I have no idea why...
Jane Doe my schools only care once it’s too late- when someone’s already passed on. Even then we only get one assembly telling us to seek help then nothing... nothing at all
My teacher teaches french with quotes from my depression so...
Jane Doe same here. A lot of the counseling teachers are teaching the dangerous of bullying, but none of the students (in my class atleast) taking it seriously. I mean they're still harrassing others. It's a joke they said but my friend couldn't take it and broke down. It was his first bullying experience and it broke him down
I wonder what his thought about my never ending bullying since kid...
There toxic people or toxic schools
But if someone actually committed suicide, everyone would suddenly be mental health advocates... I hate the stigma against mental illness. No one cares until it’s too late
Something people need to understand: Maybe it is because of hormones. Maybe it is "just a phase." Maybe it is "all in your head." That doesn't mean it's not valid. That doesn't mean we don't need help.
We need more teachers to acknowledge that we're people.
"I believe that what students need more than a score on a test or worksheet is love and support. They need to know someone cares."
Applause.
FINE stands for
F= freaked out
I=insecure
N=neurotic
E=emotional
That is the truest definition of fine I have ever seen. Every time someone asks me if I'm fine, I respond with, "I'm fine," or, "I'm never OK." (I normally use that last one as a joke) But I'm never fine.
How you doing?
oh, i'm ie.
@@smallwet
F=Fucking
I=Icelandic
N=Necropheliacs
E=Excitingly
@@smallwet I get you want people to get help but just because someone bottles up their feelings doesn't mean they don't have depression. Also if you have depression it can you feel like hopeless i.e like help won't work anyways or No one can fix me I'm to broken.
@@smallwet thanks you have a very muture reply unlike other people when I give another perspective on any situation. I have gone through it I told people after 2 weeks, but no one believed it was depression they gave other reasons. That's why bottled it up I was told that it's not depression or your fine. I am okay now I have help buy it was hard it first. I felt like no one cared about and nothing could fix me . I think you good person trying to get people not to bottled up their feelings because it hurts bottling it up.
This is my English teacher for the fall semester of the 2018-19 school year. She is absolutely amazing and so supportive and caring of her students. I love her so much.
My heart was in my throat throughout this entire video.
There are different types of depression.
There's depression that makes you withdraw from your friend groups, make you try less hard, what people point at when people say depression.
And then there's smiling depression. This, of course, is the most dangerous kind. You smile, but you don't smile inside. No one suspects a thing.
And then it's too late.
Writing letters to students should become compulsory in schools as it helps them connect so much better
Pranvi Prabhakaran I think that's a good idea, though if it was compulsory then the motive behind the letters would be less special.
Harriet Thorpe I believe it is subjective, really. It depends on the teacher, and if not writing letters, maybe we could encourage other ways for students to open up to teachers. Education still requires a lot of innovative changes. The basic idea is to reach out to as many people as possible.....Thanks for the concern.😊
you realize making it compulsory is the same problem with teachers required by law to ask if you're being bullied or feeling suicidal? it sends the message they do not care but do so ONLY because they're forced to.
I did it with my school counsellor she was very busy at times and I found out writing actually was better than words
My sophomore creative writing teacher was the first one to notice I needed help. After I had been writing really sad gloomy things and when I wrote a poem about self-harm she asked me to stay after class. When she asked me if I was okay I started crying because that was the first time someone had asked me that genuinely and not just as something casual. After that I started visiting with the school psychologist and I learned for the first time about anxiety and depression. If it wasn't for her I don't know if I would have ever gotten help. It's been nine years and I'm actively going to therapy and taking medication and it all stems back to one amazing caring teacher.
I wish my teachers in high school knew I was suicidal and I wish my professors in college knew too. I had a few counseling sessions but they only made me feel worse so I stopped. I’m hopeful to see the outcome of my life and see how far I go and succeed. I’m currently and the end of my junior year of college.
Sam you are already unstoppable. You made it this far!! Keep pushing! My daughter was suicidal and that was a wake up call for me. I listened and constantly reassured her that I love her and I also got her help. Every small change, I ask that hard question because a life without here wouldn't be a life at all for me. She is a lot better and whenever she has her lows I am right there with her every step of the way!!!! Im rooting for you!!!!! Once again you are already unstoppable in my eyes!!!!!!! You got this!!!!
I'm glad to read the "was" in "I was suicidal..." 👏
@@sherikamickens5652 If only a lot of parents can be like that yeah. Cry a lot? You are just exaggarating it. Gone quiet? You should talk more. Umm, mom and dad, what should I do exactly?
The only thing that kept me going all these years are the hope for what to come and happy moments I'm trying to get the most out of
I personally find it harder to have suicidal thoughts when I have unfinished plans. Basically, I try my best to surround myself with people I have fun with and do things that are fun so that they don’t stress me out and that I would go, ‘maybe after tomorrow’ when I think about jumping. Procrastination is good for one thing, I suppose.
I wish my school could see this video. I’m here bc a kid tried kill himself in the bathroom at my school today. he was 14. It was completely haunting to be at school all day not knowing if he was even alive or not, and all I could think to myself was “why am I not surprised?”
edit: unfortunately the kid passed away earlier today and I’m so devastated. he will never get to experience his future and he will never get to grow up and have kids and be happy again. I wish god would’ve given him another chance, but I know that he is at peace now. rest in peace jesse 2004-2019
Ms. Darras sounds like she would be a great therapist. Sadly, I know no teachers at my school that would allow one to vent to them about how they feel, if they are depressed, suicidal, etc. My school has gotten rid of school therapists because of money issues, and solely rely on guidance counselors to better ones school career. They did not consider bringing therapists back. The students had to write in the school newspaper that they were essential to a students mental health.
EATshitanddrinkbleac Doesn’t make them weak, if anything it makes them stronger.
EATshitanddrinkbleac It takes courage to talk to people about your problems because you may think “well they don’t care, I just won’t say anything” it’s better for students to talk and let their feelings out.
my depression tells me to kill myself but my anxiety makes me scared to die. we never win.
Suicide is an issue that most people are afraid to accept. Even the early signs of depression is already a term that most people don't want to mention or bring up as if it is something that is bad. Most people that are depressed thinks that no one understands or love them. The first and important part of prevention is showing love and kindness. Even if it starts at school a lot of kids find that most teachers are someone who they can go to for advice. Love that comes from a family or people you admire is always someone that can make a difference. There are always teachers and peers who will listen its just a matter of asking for the help and guidance that is needed.
As a suicide attempt survivor, this meant so much to hear. I was bawling all the way through. I wish I had had a teacher like you back then.
How you holding up starlight?
@@zakshei6967 I’m still here! and I plan on still being here for many more years to come. Things are still hard sometimes, but I’m lucky to be in a place where I’m pretty happy with this little life I have. thanks for checking in, thats kind of you
If only there were more teachers like this
XXX XXX in my school almost every teacher is.
From my experience in high school, most teachers don't really care.
This is a one in a decade teacher. There will not be any more.
Millennium*
That's not true. There are many of us who care this deeply. I only wish there were more. It kills me to think of the sadness that students suffer from some times or how they feel alone. There's not enough teachers to go around, I agree with that. So I make it a point to empower my students, to tell them that they are the first line of defense and that they might notice a difference in another student before I will. They need to tell me right away if there's anything they suspect so that I can get involved too. I also frequently lecture my classes on what it means to be kind to one another, and how it feels to have someone say something that's hurtful, even if it was said in a "joking" way. I promise you though there are teachers out there like her and like me that would give up their lives to protect their students. I just hope you find one. 💜
"Just because they're failing doesn't mean they are a failure." I don't know why but I started crying even harder at this line and I think it triggers something in me that has to do with my academic performance and such
Western school systems need to change drastically, followed by higher education. My life without school is more enjoyable and I can finally start to go off my antidepressants. Humans were not meant to be in school from 8-3 and then do 3 hours of homework every night. You have one life, do not let it be wasted by chasing something that society has told you is necessary. It is important to be educated, but the added stress and pressure is why kids hate school. Once out of school, I find myself learning more about the world than I have for the 19 years I have spent in the education system. After my degree I am done being told what I should be doing with my life.
I go to school from 7-3 lol
I go from 7-2, but I’m involved in theatre and stuff so I normally don’t get home until five
If you think western schools and societies are the only ones suffering from this epidemic you’d be very very wrong. Japan and Korea are tied for having the highest teen suicide population, there is no single cultural or systemic value that is contributing to this trend of suicide rates for all we know it could be in the food we eat, it’s such an unexplainable topic that no one answer fits.
GGyourdead Japan and korea, I believe, are actually worse when it comes to school being placed as the biggest priority in life
I agree
I started crying when she told about the cards she wrote, this woman is just amazing and we definitely need more people like her. What a legend
I cried so hard, she’s amazing and I wish we would have teachers like her.
I had actually almost cut when i first started watching this video, and now my razor is away and im in tears. Thank you for this video💖💖
I'm a teacher too and this is wonderful. I used to make my students collages with photos of them taken through their years in middle school. connection is the most important and seeing them for the brilliant young people they are is invaluable too. a good teacher exemplifies "Children are born with wings, teachers help them to fly." keep it up!
Aw! Your awesome!
Perfectionism, no boundaries (puting others first to the extreme), always being extra nice. Basically all the things the teacher said about her student are things I have seen in every suicidal person I know. Not to alarm anyone, the key is the motivation ¿is hardworking perfectionism or is never feeling enough? ¿ is being selfless or is being unable to care for themselves? ¿ is just being smiley or is being constantly scared of rejection? Sorry for the broken english and thanks for the great talk
This is a great talk but I’ve also noticed that teachers don’t care unless you’re suicidal, I’ve struggled with depression for a long time and it’s not unlikely for me to have days where my pain is so unbearable I just wanna lay down and sleep so I don’t have to feel it. Mental health is never a viable excuse to miss school but being sad, having anxiety, that’s all something worth being bullied over. We are forced to go to school even if we’d give anything to just go back to bed. Depression is an illness that people not only ignore but underestimate in levels of pain. I appreciate what she has said so much and what she did. I have teachers who know about my struggles and are nice and caring but that doesn’t lessen the pain
So true, you couldn't have said it any better!
I agree. Why does the concern rise only when a person is suicidal? Do they not care if we're happy or not? No one deserves to live like that. From experience, I learnt living like that is liking dying everyday.
“You’re not alone” everyone goes through something different
All teachers need to see this. I've had teachers that watched a certain few students take a thumbtack out of the wall and scratch their skin with it. And do absolutely nothing about it. And that is NOT okay.
What a wonderful woman and excellent teacher.
I've never heard a teacher talk so brightly about her own students. That was beautiful.
I truly admire her for what she has done and doing for her students. I can see her passionate toward everybody in her speech. You are an angel.
Bearing in mind that she is like everybody else who may also have difficulties in her life but she doesn’t used them as excuses to flare up people’s feelings.
I wished I had a teacher like you. I always thought subconsciously that I was a failure. Not even my parents told me once that I am able to live with myself and have a better life in the future.
It took me two decades to realise that what I was told or felt, was not true. I went to university when I was 35 and graduated from London University with first degree in Film and then started my career in TV industry in the age of 39.
Although that I’m too old for many other things that I wish I did when I was younger, I have realistically succeeded in things that I wanted in these few years.
Human brain has its own capacity and limit when reaches these ages. It’s not rewiring as much as it used to. I’m still struggling with those many years of negative experiences and thoughts carried on since that crucial times.
It could have been much easier if I had someone showed me or reminded me that I was special.
You are special :)
I started crying over this because i know that ill walk into school tomorrow and it'll still be like a torture chamber. Ill do what i do everyday,
hold in panic attacks and let it out when i get home,
draw my life away so i don't have to make eye contact
and last of this vague list,
ill put other over myself so much that i don't care for myself at all
I have to do so too tommorow over that i have an exam for which i have not been studying properly . Because apparently my brain isnt able to concentrate anymore . I am freaked out . Over that i had a parents teacher meeting and i had terrible remarks , my teacher wants to talk to me . I already wanna kill my self . I am shaking .
I wish the world had more people like her, so many people need her.
If I could switch this lady with one of my teachers, I definitely would.
In my opinion, I feel like School is the problem or at least high school. I think most students who commit suicide are in high and it’s the fact that it’s pretty pointless. Your putting in all these extra hours to learn stuff that ur never gonna use in life and for what. A letter A on a peice of paper every 6 weeks or so. School should end around 8th or 9th grade and a high education should be optional just like college
Tardy boi True
carl sagan once spoke about this, the younger you talk to children the more excited they are to learn. but "something" changes in the higher grades. and really it's because kids arent learning. they're being trained to memorize facts and dates
@@transgirltalks1140 just wanted to stop by and say i agree to you all
@Lauren Graves It can also be at younger ages than 13
I had a teacher who noticed I was depressed and cutting my self, she found a sub for all her classes and spent 2 days with me just sitting and talking with me and then spent time with me after every school day. I've never forgotten her kindness and I'm still here.
My teacher throws my assignments away and makes me do them again
Yoshi Drawing well do them right..
dafaq is wrong with your teacher
I’m 15 and I’ve been thinking about suicide since I was 9 years old. I’ve made it this far but I haven’t had help, I’m clinging onto life by the barest strands of hope. I feel selfish that no matter what I do I’m unhappy, lazy, tired, unmotivated, suicidal, stressed, whatever. All of it. I live an easy privileged life by all accounts but it doesn’t seem to matter. My passions: drawing, animals, biology, writing... they make me feel better, but sometimes it’s like they mean nothing to me. I’m not diagnosed with depression. I’m scared if I asked my parents for help I would cause them undue stress, or they’d send me to a religious counselor. I don’t even know why I’m writing this. Maybe because I want people to understand that it can happen to anyone.
You’re a year younger than me i hope ur still and and doing better 🙏🏽
"When we treat others Merely AS THEY ARE, they will remain as they are. When we treat them as if they are what they should be, they Will BECOME what they should be."
- T. S. Monson
That has to be one of the most, and my favorite quotes of all time. And I'll just let it speak for itself.
Also really enjoyed this talk, it's seriously something we All need to hear no matter who we are or where we came from. The most important thing we could ever give to another is Love. May we all keep this message within our hearts until the end of time. 💓 💓 💓
Breanna Hancock so self-fulfilling prophecy?
That is an amazing quote!
I have no idea who this woman is personally or how good of a teacher she is but this honestly meant so much to me. I struggle I have friends that struggle and when I was in year 4 I had this wonderful teacher who everyone thought he was a bit weird but we learnt so much from him and his criticism was never hurtful but encouraging like for example, If you can improve on your spelling for next week you will find in no time you will create wonderful story’s without one mistake. Those small differences to his speech made everyone’s day fill with hope, and that was special. Never have I ever met another teacher that was like him and even today I’m not the best speller but his words in my head motivate me to practice and be better. That is what makes a teacher special.
Very moving! All people need to know someone cares. These kids spend their lives on social media where people always put the best on show not realizing all people have struggles and challenges in life. They don't need to compare themselves. Teachers spend so much time with our kids, we need more brave educators to care!
My mum is a high school teacher and she's one of the few who cares about her students' emotions. She doesn't care so much about the grades and she always supports them. They are happy. Teachers like my mum are so rare but they're needed more than ever
What an Amazing Teacher :)
I'm Grace. I'm 9 years old and I still think nobody likes me. My friends always run away from me and I feel like there is something wrong with me. I'm still standing up for myself now by telling them that I am the same as them. Gender doesn't matter, personality doesn't matter, equality does. Your absolutely right! Now I'm in year 5 and people come up to me to ask if I'm alright because of some of my struggles at home. The struggles that I have don't put me down, I stand up for myself. At 1st I thought I didn't belong in the world but I realised that my equality could change.
Please stand up for yourself. No matter what you are like, you are equal to everybody else. :)
Damn
Are you sure you are only 9?
People sometimes think that teenagers with depression just have hormonal changes, especially children, like even at 8 some become depressed (like me)
*Like seriously parents step your game up*
Edit: OK HOW DO I HAVE SO MUCH LIKES
Agreed on that
See, I'm terrified to go to my parents for help with anything anymore, in the past they have always punished me for this sort of thing
There are also a lot of people who confuse depression for sadness
How do I send this to my teachers and people around me without actually sending it
"It begins with kindness"...
Someone in the crowd is going to go home, ask their child directly if they’re ok and or is they’re feeling depressed and such. Some children will open up while others like me will shut it down. Then those parents will forget and when that child comes to them, it’ll be a closed conversation....
but what if your homeschooled and your parents are your teachers? what if you don't really have friends you feel comfortable talking about, what if you cant talk to your parents because of theyre a large part of the reason why you're having these suicidal thoughts? There's no teacher to turn to. There's no friend who could help in your time of need. There's no school counselor. There's just you. And only you. You think About how little they care, and how they wouldn't miss you, that they'd cheer or have parties to celebrate. you cry alone in your bathroom until 3 AM and the only comfort being your dog. You think long and hard about how you want to die. You think that you should pick up that knife and harm yourself, or just end it all. The minute you start feeling happy you immediately tell yourself you don't deserve it, you don't deserve happiness. And when you start feeling better, you miss it. You miss the crying, you miss the feeling of hopelessness, you miss feeling like everyone hated you. There was something weirdly comforting about it. You don't have suicidal thoughts anymore but you feel as if you should, like your doing something wrong and you need to be punished but you're too scared to even touch the knife anymore. You make jokes to cope with the pain, jokes such as "Sorry I cant i have crippling depression" "lol wish I was dead" But its true and its a cry for help that no one will listen to and you know nobody will listen and that's why you do it because if you told them that you really did have depression, that you really did wish you were dead, they get uncomfortable and leave and you don't want to deal with loss again because it hurts and you dont want to get hurt anymore. You don't want to talk to your friends because you just feel like a burden, you feel like you've relied on them too much and they're starting to hate you, that they purposefully flake out on plans and avoid you because your just so insufferable. You hate making new friends because you get too comfortable with them and your weird sense of humor shows and it makes everyone uncomfortable, which makes you feel awful. You wish you could get as far away from your family as possible but at the same time, you never want to leave because deep down you care too much about them to even seriously think about leaving. You don't talk to them about the parts that aren't their fault because they wouldn't help. They couldn't help, why would they? Especially when you work up the courage to finally take that step towards getting better, to tell them that you're depressed, but you don't tell them why because you're scared. there are promises of help, therapy, Hugs, comfort. It would have hurt less to just hear them say therapy wasn't a good idea, that they couldn't afford it or didn't feel like it was worth the money. Instead they gave you false hope where you waited and waited for days and weeks and months for this promised help that never came and in the end, you start making reasons about why. Were your problems not bad enough? did they stop caring, do they love you anymore? Did they think it would have been a waste? You decide to believe that they just didn't take it seriously. that they felt like you were just going through a rough patch and it hurt so bad to feel as if they thought your feeling and problems was just a phase. Tell me, what do you do in that situation.
I don't have the answers, but what I do know is that you aren't a burden, that you would be missed, and that you deserve to be listened to and helped. You aren't a waste of life and the future holds so many amazing things for you, as you deserve so much better than your current situation. There are often free therapy-like things online that can be good resources to help if you don't have anywhere else to turn. Sending love.
Chocolatte hey i feel for you reach out and we can talk about our experiences
Sounds like you need better friends who love you enough to want to understand how to help you, how to listen. If I were you, I would try to reach out to another family member who isn’t really part of the reason why you feel this way. It might help with the fear of the why. Therapy is definitely a good idea, but it’s also good to have a support group. Keep being around your dog, ( dogs are better than people sometimes) and find some outlet. Whatever it is, you need to let it out somehow. You deserve to be happy. Please don’t believe otherwise. You deserve to know that you are loved, and that will never change. You are a precious human life, no matter how many times you tell yourself you’re worthless. Personally, I think that a weird sense of humor is the best kind. And as far as explaining how you feel to your family, try to write it down first. Writing can help you put more thought into what you’re trying to say, and hopefully in a way they can understand. I hope you’re doing better these days. ❤️
I started to cry while watching this. I've been feeling suicidal and I didn't know that anybody could care.
This is by far the best ted talk I’ve heard in a while. I attempted suicide a little more than 6 months ago, and it was my high school teacher who kept me going. Her voice in the back of my head told me to call 911, and that’s the reason I was saved. I trust this teacher more than anyone else. Teachers make such a difference in this world.
I am in college to be a teacher. I made my first suicide attempt at age 16. I hope and pray that I am able to spot a suicidal child. Thank you for this video.
I really need a teacher like Ms. Darras❤️this was a beautiful talk❤️
I remember this year (grade 10), I transferred to a new school, I came from a very poor school (basically a scam) to a completely new world (it was like any other school but not a scam), I didn't know what to do... I got mental breakdown from September to March. I recall sleeping 2 to 3 hours a day, cry every day, depressed 24/7, I had no friends and lost confidence in myself. There were teachers who embarrassed me in front of the whole class. I did everything I could. Time limits, Stress, no motivation or support, feeling of hatred, made me stop studying. It became worse... I brought low marks in term 1 and cried endlessly, I remember not doing my homeworks due to unintentionally 15 hour nap (from returning back to school to next day of school) and be hella stressed for not doing the assignment, the teacher had literally embarrassed me in front of everyone and didn't accepted my excuse, not only that but also I did an assignment but forgot it at home, she didn't believe me and demanded me to come with her to the principal. I got sick and was contacted with some sort of virus twice twice. The first time I remember the coldness and can't move, dizzy and just unable to do anything. The second time was worse, I got acnes and pimples covering my body, (it happenened suddenly next day at morning), I had the worse migraine anyone could imagine and was determined that I was going to die any moment. Days later after I skipped tests and school and was unable to move, no one asked. And one teacher suspected me not doing the homework.
This whole year, I cut my arm with knife, entered a state no one could imagined and tried hard but didn't succeed, failed attempts of wanting to sucide multiple times, no one literally cared.
Until... now.
You can't imagine.... just imagine how this corona virus appearing made lock downs, made me bring back to my normal state (after 20 days) I feel alot happier, right now it is 11:23am and I have classes but I'm skipping them all. (starts from 8am till 2:30pm) I even have a test on 12:45pm
But you know what? Health is more valuable than anything else. Trust me this education system is totally Wrong. Basically people are determined that:
Study hard = Success = ily
Don't study hard= Failure= I hate you.
And why I said that "love or hate" is because teachers, students and everyone is completely biased.
My story is long and I can't type furthermore but remember... no one will really care for you, everyone cares about what they will get.
Remember, if u got successful one day, look at how people will treat you differently and how many will come to you.
Sorry English is not my first language.
this is amazing! as someone in school I think every student needs someone to do something like this for them
I love how she says “my student” instead of “the student/a student”
"They need LOVE and SUPORT and to know that someone CARES" world needs more people like her imagine a teacher writing personalized messages for each and every student, she is giving them support and reassurance and courage and that is what teachers should do, not force students to do something but give them strength and confidence to do it with their own will. People can learn so much from her
Teachers like her are what have helped me in my roughest patches in life. Beginning of my freshman year of high school I was not doing well mentally. I was facing rejection from things I was passionate about, and I just felt lonely. I was slowly giving up and losing hope in things that used to excited me and motivate me. Nobody really looked deep into it, thought that I was just having a rough day, week, month. One day, one of my teachers at the time pulled me before going to lunch and sat down with me. She said how she noticed that I wasn't as active and outgoing as I used to be. That my light just slowly dimmed. I was reluctant to say anything since I was used to bottling things up because I thought that no one would listen, that my voice won't be heard. I was weirded out why a teacher was interested in my well-being outside of the classroom to be blunt. Even if I started talking about it, what would she even do to make things better anyways? Why me? She sat there until I finally said something. I was finally heard by somebody. And she actually tried to help, and listened deeply to my frustrations. She was the reason I finally got help. To this day I still have teachers that reach out to me if they notice me struggling. Those teachers hold a special place in my heart. I still am fighting the good fight, especially right now. But if it weren't for my teachers going beyond what the job requirements are for students' needs, I don't know where I would be today to be totally honest. But now I don't have to. I am beyond thankful for them. Every kid deserves to be noticed and to receive compassion. Even if it means an email, or a note of encouragement. Thank you teachers. Shout out to Mrs. Fischer, Ms. Ward, Mrs. Slattery, and Mrs. Robrahn!
Today I told my physics teacher that all of us suffer from enormous stress and anxiety because of school and the pressure to receive good grades.
He simply said "No"
Like what
im transferring to whatever school she teaches at.
This made me cry
I wish I had a teacher like her
A lot's
I wish this was my teacher wth
She's an amazing teacher, no joke. I love that she finds a positive in everyone, and that she actually spent her time to a student in a mental hospital. That was really sweet of her
this is some of the reasons that i've always thought that teachers are real life heroes. and why i've always wanted to be a teacher.
I'm struggling really hard with major depression, and generalized anxiety, and my teachers do know that I need more help than others because I struggle with my self alot more because of the thoughts in my head and the feelings in my chest, heart, and body. But that teacher, I freaking love her. She's so right. Most days I just need someone to show me some care, love, guidance, kindness, and encouragement. It really helps make me feel like all my efforts are worth it and encourge me to keep beliving in my self. and tell me all the great things they see in my self, and that would already help me alot. She's definitely on the right path of helping people survive!!