My friend is Filipino and she takes care of her entire family from here in the states. I think most of her check goes back to the Philippines. Housing, bills and food! For 2 households. 1 is her disabled mother and her brother who cares for her. The other I think are some cousins 🤷♀️ I don’t think she pays for their food but dang she’s not an ATM! She has a big heart. Sadly I think they are taking advantage of her. (The cousins)
@lauriekrebsbach8190 yeah. I would understand the disabled mom since she's so close and she can't work. But if cousins can work and provide a fair life, then they don't value their dignity if they ask for money 😅
Same and I'm totally fine with taking care of my mom eventually. But for myself, I have no retirement plan. Tbh I hope I die in some tragic accident once my mom passes because I doubt I will ever make enough to have a comfortable retirement.
There's another reason many Germans are still so obsessed with saving where they can: history. Not just the last two wars, but centuries of troubles before that. Whether it was prolonged war like the 30 years war (some areas were nearly completely depopulated by the time it was over), social upheaval (e.g. witch hunts) or just your normal disasters (disease, famine), Germans learned to prepare for the future. Even if younger Germans don't quite understand what makes their parents and grandparents tick, it's still a long-standing tradition. Germans now save because Germans in the past did. Some of those savings go into leisure projects. But the bulk typically gets invested or squirreled away in a savings account. And I'd bet you that German Boyfriend has his own stash as well. It's just that Germans (typically) do *not* talk money with strangers, so we'll never know.
I hear that you feel proud of supporting your family, but what I’m also hearing is that your family didn’t plan for themselves and instead chose to make you responsible for their future problems. It seems like it’s unfair of them to place that burden on you and almost like they created you for the sole purpose of relieving that burden.
@@CKC298 my comment stands for itself. You sir, or ma’am, have no clue where they have come from and how hard they have worked to give me such an opportunity. They have literally come from eating one meal a day to where they are today. For that I’m forever fucking grateful. Now when I was younger and couldn’t take care of myself, all of them took care of me. I will return the favor in kind, and proudly so!
@@nidhisridhar5453 you didn’t deny what I said though. All of those things can be true (that you’re proud of what they did for you, that you value their sacrifices, and that creating someone so they can take care of you is unfair to the new person).
@@CKC298 if you need me to categorically deny it, let it be known that I deny it! What circumstances we are born in is not something that we can control. I would never call people who feed me as a burden, and it is not unfair! What we need to do as the next generation is ensure we are so strong that we can provide for the next generations, and to the previous, and at the end of it, try and lessen the burden we may cause to the next generation!
@CKC298 I agree with OP. My parents save money where ever they can but the country I come from isn't generous or kind to the elders in terms of their finances. They are saving money and will continue to do so but anything can happen and ruin all that. On top of it, I want to make enough money one day that not only I can act as a secondary safety net for them but also buy them all that they sacrificed for us.
I'm an American and I bought the house beside mine for my mother. We are not rich by any means. These are small homes in a poor neighborhood. But knowing she will never have to worry about a home makes me glad every day.
Hardship to bring out the best in most people, most of the time. We seem to be pretty hard wired to help each other. In a wealthy society with good social security, we pay our taxes and that fulfils that need for many people. Others might donate to charity occasionally, or even regularly, if they have the means. If a friend has in quarantine (happened a lot recently) you go shopping for them. And that is the most precious gift of them all, your time and caring for someone.
Yeah I can relate to this as I came from an Asian country where a government/social safety net is almost non-existent and if there is one, it’s barely enough to feed you. I’m so glad most European countries have a safety net so people don’t get incredibly destitute and have enough for housing and food and some things that make them happy. Life is more than just surviving. Also I can see why you’re helping your family out. I believe it’s something called Filial Piety. It’s something I grew up with. There is an expectation to give back to family and to look after them.
In the West we (white people, anyways) are not exactly known for our filial piety. However I just want to say that I really admire that mindset and I have a bit of it instilled in me as well from my parents. My parents never told me "you have to take care of us when we're elderly", but I witnessed how much time and money they put into taking care of their parents (my grandparents), and it taught me to care for my family. For example, my mom would visit my grandpa every single day when he moved into an old folk's home after my grandma died. Eventually my sister and I started helping out and one of us would spend some time with him daily- we moved him to a place 5 minutes away so it would be an easy trip. I really loved spending time with him and making his day better. I'll 100% do the same for my parents if/when they get old or sick. And I also feel a lot of loyalty to my sister and my cousins as well. Whenever somebody needs help we pitch in. I really admire cultures where everyone does this!
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
@@marzipanmangoit wont be there anymore in the near future cause we keep importing people from africa and the middle east that are barely literate and drain the systems dry
Aaaauuugh you are so right! I'm Dutch but I got into heaps of trouble money-wise and when you need that stuff to SURVIVE, it is SO hard to explain that to people who only need extra for extra. I never could even start out thinking about extra! I only ever had basic, if that!
I live in the Netherlands, and seriously... the amount of money you need here just to live is INSANE! Our income is taxed so heavily, yet we still have to pay for so much and can't afford to do other things (like driving on the roads we pay taxes for, or seeing a specialist after paying so much in health insurance, etc.). We can't even think about saving when every last cent is being wrenched out of us in taxes and living costs 😅 It's enough to make appreciate my home country, even if the standard of living is worse there.
I live in the Netherlands and I save plenty. It really depends on what you spend it on. If you have a lot of subscriptions cut them all out and find "free" alternatives - it saves a good penny each year. But I agree that the Netherlands is way too expensive, especially the ridiculous healthcare.
Brit here. I've always had money problems. It's hard when other people think you are just being tight (mean with money) when in fact you actually have very little to spare. I can tell you how many times I've said I can't afford it and they jump to the conclusion that I actually have it but just don't want to spend it. It seems most always seem to have 'a little extra' to spend on silly, not (survival important things) and they seem to think everyone else has, too.
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
This is so true! Thank you for posting this 😭 Asians are often mocked for being obsessed with money, but it’s because money is our only safety net. When my European friends give me European-style advices like “you should just follow your heart and do what you like” or “you should be more chill”, (sometime with a sense of superiority,) I always feel a bit annoyed. Cuz I don’t have a European citizenship like them.
No, they're shunned because they come to your country and erode your financial system by sending everything they earn home, therefore destroying your country to enrich their own. Which is literally what she admits in this video.
I am so sorry that u felt probably really uncomfortable, because of it. Thankyou for sharing your experience, maybe u could explain that to people, if it happens again. That way they learn how good they actually have it and that not everyone shares the same experiences.❤🌻🌶💙
Is pretty similar here in South America 😪. At this moment life seems hopeless. Right now, if I fall sick, I cannot even get medical attention, I don't have any kind of medical insurance and well, I just have enough money to go and come back from the university campus for this week. Let's hope my health stays ok 😅. I just try everyday to feel at peace with that fact and the emotions it produces, be thankful because I have another day to be in this world, sharing with people I love and fix my mind in the thing I need to do so that my financial life becomes stable 🙏. I'm praying from here everything becomes better for you guys there, so that we all can enjoy existence without the worry of how are we going to survive another day 🌼🙆
@@HelpToFindHappyness Since I am one of the europeans that aprechiates other people showing me their experinces. I can say not all of us r like that. I also grew up with parents that struggled financially for a significant part of their life and understand that money has a different meaning to them. It took me a while to even realise how freaking blessed I am due to my cutizenship alone, since I was raised with a lack mentality. Due to brave comments like the main comment here, I was able to get a healthy realitycheck. Having Healthcare and at least basic level education is a blessing, especially if u can have it without your family being well off. Just most people that know that as normal don't realise how much of a difference that makes. ( not saying things r perfect, how much your family can help u with schoolwork still has an huge impact on a lot of people). Anyway I am gratefull that I was able to learn how other people experince life, that way I can at least try to learn how to have more compassion and emphaty. It also helped me to understand an amazing friend of mine and why that person values money so much. For everyone passing by I wish u an ok day and hope things will get better for u soon, even tho I don't know what u r going through. I can at least try to wish some people well, even if I cant do anything to help.🌬🌹💗😶
I don’t know why it’s so hard for some people to understand that there are those of us who actually do want to take care of our parents and our family when we find ourselves in a better place nobody forces us to do it it doesn’t feel like our duty. It just makes us feel good that we are not stressing about money and neither are our family
True, my mother and rest of my family get on my case because I help support my little granddaughter in Thailand. For health reasons, my son has not been able to work and provide for his family. I am financially secure here in the US and if I can provide for my granddaughter to go to a good school in Thailand and have a better quality of life why not? I can’t take my money to my grave. Still, I never hear the end of it with my family here in the US. ☹️. At least over there my son and his family have universal healthcare. Here, a trip to the ER will leave you bankrupt unless you have health insurance.
It's the other way around in Germany. People think I am a horrible person for not wanting to care for my parents. Not that I didn't already do that for many years, especially financially. Doing that, I wasn't even able to save money for a car. Yet alone for being able to pay for their retirement care. But still, people judge me permanently if I even so much as tell them, that I cut contact. Like a former boss of mine...who invited everyone for dinner shortly after hiring me, and the topic came up. And they asked me something, that I couldn't answer. So honest like I am, I told them: Sorry, I can't answer that, cos I am not in contact with my parents. You should have seen her face...and heard what she said. For 5 minutes she tried to convince me, that it was my duty to be a good daughter and stay in contact.🤦♀️ Like I would explain to her the reasons in front of 20 people I just met a few weeks ago at work. I am gonna sit there and explain all the abuse I had been through???! No. People are so blind sometimes. Imagine their faces if I told them (just for example, cos this does happen all the time sadly) about being the victim of SA at the age of 3. What an evening that would have been!? It's so hard when they put you in this position, where you can only shut them up, by telling them everything about your trauma. As if you could and as if it was any of their business. And they are sooo offended, if you call them out on that. Like...one time (wasn't my boss, just some friend of a friend) I couldn't listen anymore to them blaming me and I said: Okay, what would you accept as a reason for not keeping contact? What is horrible enough? Emotional abuse? Physical abuse? Hospitalisation? Or do we need SA to earn the right to cut contact? I was pretty angry, but I tried to keep cool. And they just watched me with big eyes. And I told them, I wasn't being rethorical and I expect an answer. What would in their opinion be enough to be allowed to cut contact without being blamed and shamed?! They mumbled something I couldn't hear and I just turned my head and started a conversation to another person. It was a party. Most people here don't get mental health. And they are depressed and brainwashed by their parents often times. Only cos they don't know it, they don't believe that they are been treated badly. So you can't make an argument out of your suffering. They think, you owe your parents in general. That is not true. Your parents decided to have sex and give birth to you. It's in them! I didn't choose to be born. Non of us do. We have to manage life best we can. And having had no help at all, but instead having been kept from living and had stones put in your path actively by your own parents...I have no regrets cutting contact and I my life has been so much easier without them. I am sure that people in poor countries have bad homes too. It's not just a problem here in Germany. But maybe it's more rare here. Idk numbers. But we all have the right to say no.
I agree sometimes it’s just simply your love and care for them not some obligation, which some people don’t really understand. I wonder if they know what “love” exactly is.
Parents that are financially unstable and need support at at the end probably were so when their children where small as well. It's upsetting to be asked to support someone that didn't do everything they could for you when you were a kid. (We had money collectors over quite often but mom was still smoking and spending her money on her pets.) I'm still struggling financially partly due to stuff my parents did when I was younger. If asked I would still support them since I love them but man would I be upset.
@@Rin-oo9pf I am sorry that is your experience, poverty is hard on everybody be in a family unit. We were also financially unstable but it was because the financial supporter of my family passed away leaving four small children and my mother’s career had been put on pause for seven years and it was during the height recession. Still my mom is the best parent I have ever met and as a parent myself I am in awe of her patience and resilience.
As an American.... I can completely relate to this. I'm very aware that 1 big medical issue could completely destroy my savings, and although I have a good job now, doesn't mean I will have it forever, they could easily decide to just close the department.
Very true for Americans who plan ahead. Some do not realize and plan, then end up living with financial difficulties after medical need comes. It is sad to see elderly people forced to make hard choices and sacrifices to pay bills that affect their comfort.
You are both wise and kind. Having a large safety net for yourself and for your family is absolutely more important than the latest iPhone, a trip to the beach in winter, or designer coffee. Good for you!
Being a New Zealander living in the UK I take social security for granted. Thanks for the reminder that this is a privilege, not a right, but one that I wish all humans had.
@@MsDebadattaHear hear! A universal basic income, and/or (but really *and*) universal basic services, is an agreement we should all be making with each other.
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
@@gialviz3870cats live better than us citizens in turkey lmao. i’m still happy they’re well-taken care tho. 🥺 i make sure cats around my neighborhood are well-taken care too.
This video is misleading. Only privileged Germans who wait for their parents inheritance see it this way. Most can't save due to high living cost and all are afraid of being destitute in retirement.
This is so relatable. In my head, my savings are not only for me but for my family too. I have enough money to travel but I choose not to, no one asked me to do that but can't shake that 'just in case' or 'what if' feeling
Not Traveling saves money for us and also saves the planet by not polluting.. Air Travel should be for emergencies and not for leisure as they can cause ozone damage 😢 TH-cam is a great place to see distant places in 4K or above..!
@@manutd054The idea of robbing ourselves of the opportunity to experience the world firsthand while corporations freely pollute a million times more than us as individuals is incredibly sad.
While I don't share the same sentiment, it's not wrong to want to travel. I just feel in the context of this video, some people choose not to indulge even if they can afford it because they prioritize a responsibility they put onto themselves. My partner even disagrees with my way of thinking though but he grew up in a first world country lol@@manutd054
I'm from the UK and am incredibly grateful for our safety nets which supported me when I ended up a single parent. But before that I spent 10 years in Africa where you had to be prepared to help your friends as there was no safety nets at all. We should be very grateful for our safety nets, but we should also do our best to be self supporting as much as possible.
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
Where in Africa if I may ask? I'm from Namibia. Our government provides monthly pensioner allowance for the elderly citizens and we have free basic (and even some complex) medical services in all public hospitals. We save too obvioysly for the future of our children's varsity fees but we struggle because our biggest needs are (very often) for a countless number of young cousins that are living in poverty at the villages. Theyre's hardly ever enough money to afford their basic needs like clothes, decent food, school uniforms, shoes etc. Those that finish school and don't have working parents also always need us cousins to constantly contribute money for their varsity fees. It's so difficult for us in that aspect. And different.
I've always been really impressed with the assistance available for needy families in the UK. We do have welfare in the US but it takes years to get reduced housing or rental assistance, you can get food assistance if you qualify but you have to have kids to get state insurance, any temporary cash assistance is pretty minimal & comes with strings, in my case I had to go on assistance while child support was being processed after my son was born, even if both parties move as fast as possible it takes abt 4-6 months. Law requires the non custodial parent to have child support taken directly from their paycheck so as soon as the payments began coming to me from my son's father the state also started taking an additional sum every month until he paid them back all the cash assistance they had provided me.
i’m black american and can definitely resonate with this. i just want to be able to take care of my grandma and mom when they get too old to take car of themselves.
America in general. Our safety net is nowhere as good as much of Europe, so kids born to working class parents that are able to do better financially often end up taking care of them
What a good daughter you are. And what a great sibling. I hope your family understands and cherishes you. Not just for this but for your other merits. You’re a hard worker and an excellent entertainer. Thank you for letting me into your world and provide me with a bit of escapism from my own
I'm a Russian living in France and had this conversation with an Italian guy who told me I was obsessed woth money. That's because im poor and grew up poor 😅
That's the problem of your country - being the richest in natural deposits and selling gas/oil to everyone around, but the majority is poor and even millions don't have sewage system, drinking water and gas at home 🤦 Your country and you with your natives are such a disgrace.
Russian life expectancy for men plummeted after the fall of the Soviet union. It's never recovered and is to thos day lower then men in North korea. Most of this can be laid at the feet of the US and the rich vultures who came in and picked the bones clean. Few Americans remember this but a few yrs after the collapse of the USSR the Russian people voted in hard left parties to deal with the rampant corruption and in response to American demands their president orchestrated a coup by ordering tanks to be driven thru the Kremlin. So much for spreading democracy.
Same! I'm in Canada and had this conversation with my Canadian hubby. I said I would like to always know where my next meal is coming from because we grew up very poor and there was no social backup.
I'm in the US, and our healthcare is notoriously- awful. It's awful. My bf had to go to the ER without insurance and now he owes $25,000 for that visit. No ambulance ride. We didn't stay in a room "overnight", we were just there for a few hours that happened to be late at night in the ER section. He told me that he would have rather not have been taken to the ER, which is such a common and messed up way of looking at things here. One day we're debt free, the next day -$25k. We don't even own a car right now so it feels hopeless sometimes. Glad to see you taking care of your family.
Not sure how long ago this was, but often if you call the billing department and ask for an itemized invoice, they will adjust overpriced line items and reduce the total if you explain your situation (that you are unable to pay), or they may have forgiveness programs.
Sometimes i forget people provide for their families. I come from a very broken and awful family so i would not ever consider sending them money (or recieving it) but good on you for helping yours out.
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
@@misses1768why do you religious people always come in with non sensical beliefs. It’s nice to say God will provide but that is not the norm! It’s actually people and actual cash that is needed to live Not just trust on a deity. In my past people that live saying that usually take advantage of others.
@@glomontero6011 What is exactly nonsensical? That he believes in God or that he believes God provides (in ways and and at times we wouldn't expect). Also I'm pretty sure he's not nearly as nonsensical as the current woke liberal agenda which has been made the new gospel and orthodoxy.
@@davidstrelec2000Both, actually. I'm sorry dear stranger on the internet, not everyone you encounter here has to believe in God and whatever the bible has to say. It would had been fine if Uyen was like, "I was able to provide for my family with the help of God." But no! She pulled through with her own strength, her belief in her self that if she gets through, Uyen can make sure her family left in Vietnam could at least experience a quarter of what she has in Germany. Seriously, you and your group of clowns with their dunce hats. Stop calling everything you don't like or agree with liberals !!! Oh and sorry for my English, I'm not exactly great with articulating my thoughts properly.
Uyen is very noble for helping here family at home and I am glad she is in a situation to do so, hopefully things can turn around in her home country and I wish the best for the people that live there
I don't see ueyen having the donations tab, gift shop, premium members club, live streams with donations or over doing with adds. So millions dollars hmm.. you haven't seen the other youtubers telling what is their income!!! She doesn't even make a ten K in month bro. Grow a mathematical brain, please😊 Poorest joke in the world😂😂😂
Totally hear you here in America. You’re always closer to homelessness than being a millionaire. God forbid you get sick, or your entire family can lose everything trying to keep you alive. Life insurance is cheaper than health insurance. I’m truly so glad you have a safety net.
@@misses1768and what does that verse have anything to do with the price of tea in China? Or about families being driven into homelessness and poverty due to a serious illness?
I worked at a women's abused/homeless shelter at 18yrs old. It made me realise the majority of people are only a step away from homelessness. Especially, housewives, unfortunately. Some are truly at the mercy of their partners. It really infuriates me how many abused women came there because none of their so called friends and family would help them and their children. Most people won't help people who are truly in need instead choosing to scornfully judge them without even having one conversation with them. Some ladies were even active church members. Those made me the most angry. How could their church "friends" turn their backs on them at their most desperate time?! Unforgivable.
@@misses1768what do you do to actually HELP people in need of food, homes, jobs, etc? I'm not talking about other church people who already have all of those things, I'm talking about the ones who have lost everything. Do you help or judge as believers are wont to do? Remember "G-d" is watching and listening and doesn't abide lying. All I see you doing to verbally diarrheaing passages which do NOT help pay the bills, fill stomachs and bank accounts. Since you're such a believer get off of social media and go actually DO something to help people.
US here: Even though we pay taxes into a social security system, the money isn’t very much; the health insurance is bad, so we can’t rely solely on this government program.
I paid all of my fathers debt after I moved to the USA together with my brothers down payment on a small apartment and had completely forgotten about it until I saw this video. Damn, I am proud of being helpful, my family shaped me and supported me. I’m happy to do the same for them. Thanks for the reminder
I think I know how you feel. As my parents got older they gradually started to do less and less for themselves. They both became more and more forgetful. There were hundreds of situations that arose due to dementia. Initially they refused all help saying I was too busy. It took 10 hours on 2 buses each way to go to them. Initially I thought my siblings would help out but they didn't. I gradually took over driving Mum to her two groups she attended each month which were on the same day. So my bus trips changed from once every 6 weeks when I had my 4 day weekends to once a month. So Bathday became the day I got off the bus at 7 am and caught the second bus to near their house. Dad would see me out his window when I got off the bus. He would drive down the steep hill to pick me up, which I gradually became unable to climb, especially with a bag. I would give Mum breakfast and remind her over and over about needing a bath. I was the only person who ever managed to persuade her to have a bath. Those were very busy, trying to get to two social groups. What an incredible gift, privilege and opportunity I had to assist my parents with respect, love, patience, skill, reliability and dignity. These monthly trips went on for several years. The work left by my siblings to do on my own was an indescribable amount. I would make many meals each month and put them in recycled plastic containers in the fridge. There was a lot of cleaning, all the doctors appointments, Dad's car registration, driving license renewal and hundreds of other things. They got carers who helped with medications, dishes, floor cleaning etc which was great. I was very very fortunate that the carers would ring me when Dad started fretting, and I could then have more information about how my parents were and whether I should take the extra trip there. I have had a career in nursing and had some great achievements financially, but helping my parents to live blissfully together in their own beloved home looking across the ocean and sky, is easily the most rewarding thing I have done in my life. The Pacific Island people on the long bus trips always told me I would be blessed. It was not until my parents died that I understood what this meant. The peace and satisfaction I have with this extraordinary era of my life is immeasurable. The synagogue group and the genealogy group are two of the main things I did with Mum to connect to the past and future. The creative ways that challenges are solved is truly wonderful as all carers will know. Even if a person cannot help others financially, there is so much people can to to be very useful and deeply meaningful.
I'm dating an Indian guy and this difference between eastern and western is brutal. My Brazilian parents did everything they could to be financially stable and never counted on me and my brother, the opposite actually, they left us in a stable situation. My bf is obsessed about sending money to his family and it's all the time worried about everyone's well-being over his. It's kinda hard to plan a life with someone like that bc I feel his family with me will never be his priority, and we'll always be working to keep 2 families. Slowly it's breaking down the relationship.
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
I understand you as Thai people. We have poor safety net. We need more safety net as good as German Edit: oh my. I got so many like. Let root for my country to get ture democracy soon. Cheer for everyone who survived
@@Muralidharan001Ok, and then she pays high German tax to cover that strong safety net. The cost of being a source of financial stability for an undisclosed number of people as an immigrant is still heavy emotionally and mentally regardless of how much you make.
It feels so good to know that you’re able to secure your family or future when they weren’t able to do that for you it is truly a blessing and something not many understand or will even do ❤️🙏🏽
I’m so glad my family moved to Germany when I was little. They didn’t give me any financial support after I moved out even though (how I found out later) they are required to by law until I’m 25 years old. Still, thanks to monetary aid from the government I could move out and go to university. And now I’m chronically ill and can barely get by. I’d be doomed without the social monetary security net. The system is very flawed of course and needs a lot of improvement but if you take the help that’s offered to you you can survive even without having people in your life who care enough to not let you starve. Talking to many folks in other countries I feel so lucky to live here, gooosh.
i totally agree. im from germany too and my family is poor. growing up money was always something existential instead of something for leisure, but im highly aware that being poor in germany is not the same as being poor elsewhere. we get governmental aid, there are ways to get support, and life quality even when u dont have much and have to count every coin is still very high.
As a Filipino, I definitely relate to this😢 My husband and I are middle class earners. Our witholding taxes are 64% of our income but social security here in the Phil is non-existent for us. That is why I urge my children to finish college then migrate to Germany/Spain/Denmark/ Finland anywhere where social securities are due given😢
Damn, I didn't know the Philippines was more corrupt than the US with the whole "tax you to hell, but also have fun with the medical bills and retirement dream"
Don't choose Germany. Our system gets worse by the day. I heard good things about the Netherlands and also Denmark, Sweden, Finland and Norway. Forget Germany, we've got lots of troubles.
So you want to immigrate to my country in order to benefit from our hard work? Not interested in culture, history, language, people? Ask yourself this: do you want to BECOME A GERMAN and leave your past and origins behind completely? If not, please reconsider your plan.
I love how she is making bao while talking about this topic. She is showing us how she is saving money making her own bao while talking about it. The baos look really good too !
Do you know what the electric steamer she cooked them in is called? I tried googling but no luck Nvm I found it with "stainless steel food steamer appliances"
As a disabled American my greatest fear has been when I’m no longer able to rely on myself who will I rely on. And the list is not long. So my only hope is to make enough money to take care of my mom and myself. I don’t want to be sick again and fight to keep my job so I have a dinky, empty apartment to go back to and then have to work twice as hard to get back to livable. I need to know that I can rest when I should be resting. When people say money doesn’t buy happiness of course it doesn’t. I only live for my family. But everyone deserves a decent living. Don’t make yourself feel bad for wanting a good life for yourself and your family. As long as you’re not taking much more than you need and your heart is in the right place that phrase wasn’t meant for you.
This also gets truer and truer for many Germans. Many Germans already can’t live off the retirement payments they recive and the number of people affected by that will constantly grow. I‘ve grown up with two parents who couldn’t afford most of the nice things that still so many Germans take for granted. Around me kids were sad and angry because they family only could afford one family holiday in Italy this year. While my family wasn’t able in years to afford holiday away from our place. Still a lot of my German friends don’t understand how careful I am with spending money even though I’m German myself. Some invite me for dinner at an affordable restaurant. Some don’t even spend time with me any more since to them it’s just enerving that I can’t just afford everything they take for granted.
There is a culture of going out and spending money now that is getting crazy, people can't afford a home but eat out many times a week, don't even know how to cook and even how to have fun and spend time with friends without spending money it's ridiculous... Maybe you are much better off without such company. True happiness is sometimes in fewer but true friends and small things that don't cost a lot of money... I usually just invite my friends for tea in my house and bake a cake or make some pancakes it costs so little and if I want to go out I go to the beach or the natural parks to take a walk and bring a picnic basket and the dogs and I am the happiest person... but I am lucky because it's beautiful where I live but believe me here in Portugal we know how to make the best use of little money and enjoy ourselves 😅 you can spend the day at a café drinking just one coffee for less than 1 euro... The old ladies all do it 😉
Poverty is very isolating - particularly so in a society in which there is a very uneven distribution of wealth. If everyone is poor, they can get together with the expectation that they won't be spending a lot of money and that no one is going to be wearing fancy clothes, etc. But if you are the one person in your social circle who doesn't have a lot of money, you are going to end up avoiding socialising because you can't do "your part" in group activities.
Yep. I say it as a German who actually got into the position to rely on the so called social net. They make you jump through so many hoops that you save yourself or are on the absolute bottom until it catches you. I applied for unemployment after paying for it for literally years and was denied because aparently I only filed for unemploment money but did not file a separate application of being unemployed. And it took them 6 weeks to write me that letter of rejection. Its a joke.
Also from Germany, my grandma actually taught me how to save up money even if it looks like one can’t afford it. Got taught how to cook and bake according to what’s on sale because it’s in season, and how to can it. What to always stock up when it’s price reduced because it can stay in the cupboard for a long time, because that way there will even be food in the house when there is no food in the store anymore, or when the food prices go up to much. Was extremely helpful during the pandemic when the store’s shelves were empty and were overpriced after they finally restocked again. I meanwhile added stuff like portable gas cooker and other stuff useful when there is a blackout. I should also add that it’s often cheaper to buy in bulk, that’s extremely helpful, since that way I safe money and have enough ingredients to can food for the cupboard. Sadly in Germany that seems to be lost knowledge.
My grandparents immigrated from France to raise me in America after my father moved there and was a single dad with Asperger’s Syndrome. I’m now their safety net and making them proud working in Tech
I really admire the dedication I see in people who have immigrated here to Canada, to provide as much extra as possible for family members back in their home country who don't have the same opportunities. ❤ What you are doing for your family is amazing.
I can relate to this as a immigrant daughter, and the eldest you feel like you need to work hard to repay your families sacrifices...You are the sweetest ❤
Think about your families sacrifices a moment. That's the common wealth of a nation. Imagine if someone moved in tomorrow and demanded equal treatment, and equal access, to the wealth of your family. Annoying? Criminal? Yes. This is the endless genocidal displacement migration of scab labour brought in by megacorps and politicians. The common wealth of Germany is why it's currency is so high. Because of all the blood,, sweat, and tears of those who sacrificed their life working hard beforehand. She should be in Vietnam doing the same thing. Not stealing Germany's wealth to send it to Vietnam.
In my hometown, it was also in part because parents financially support their children not only until they reach adulthood (17 years old in my country), but also through college (if student debt is neccessary, parents would be the one taking the debt and paying it, not the child) and afterward until they are financially stable themselves. Then parents also usually help with wedding and getting the first house. It´s not uncommon for someone in their 20+ to still living with their parents and fully financially relying on the parents. That help said children to start their independent life, when they got their first job, without worrying about debt or anything like that. But that also means parents can´t really saving up for their retirement. So I think it´s just fair that in turn, the children would then help their elderly parents when they could no longer support themselves.
It's the way it's always been, but countries haven't always been as wealthy as they are now. That wealth should be used on the people, since our labor helps to create it
You’re a good family member for continuing to take care of your family even though to live so far away now. Wishing you, your boyfriend and your family all the best.
I feel this as a former homeless person. I wasn’t on the streets, but I put everything I had into saving for my own place so that I could get my own place. I’m very frugal with money even now, and always keep money set aside for emergencies.
As an Argentinean immigrant, I understand you perfectly. My country is i financially unstable and I want to be able to help my loved ones. Keep working and saving but don’t forget to care for yourself too ❤
I have ADHD bad, but I'm loyal, dedicated and hard working. I just started a new job at a family owned Japanese sushi restaurant and my boss is amazing. The Asian culture is beautiful to me, and instead of getting angry with me bc I started something and forgot to finish they HELP me and we all work together as a team and it is so perfect and I'm so happy ❤. We actually care about our customers, we serve extremely high quality food and I'm so impressed by everything lol. The point of this comment was to say how when I get fat tips my boss and coworkers are happy for me and we all want each other to succeed and make money and it's such a different atmosphere from my old lame corporate job.
Ooh wow Yes, I've definitely inherited the "save money to survive" mentality - both my grandparents were one in 8 and very poor, and still save everything even though they have lots of money
Sometimes I wish we could take all the good qualities of each country and just put them together and make it universal. I love how every country and culture has some wholesome thing that they do. I think it’s really sweet that taking care of family and parents is part of a lot, if not all, Asian cultures.
It's truly a blessing growing up in a rich ass country Even when you're poor, you're still better off than most of the world We should appreciate that more
I can relate to this. Between grad studies and a previous difficult employment situation, having money is really about safety for me. Certainly it means I can do fun things, but in the end, it's really about ensuring some level of control in my life.
This is true for me too. I’m my dad’s durable power of attorney since he had a major accident in 2018 when it snapped me into the reality that we don’t have a good retirement plan in the US either unless you save money & my parents did all they could for me and my sisters including use the savings to pay for things we needed and in hard times which didn’t leave them with much. I know I’m their future bc in no way could I not work as hard as I can so my parents can finally afford to relax. Their in their 60s and they still worry about money & my dad works part time bc of it. I feel this
As a foreing student from south america, this felt so true to me. I just got a job recently so I can meet my ends bc situation in this country has gotten kinda tough specially for foreigners, but I wish I could get some extra coins to send back home. I have a youger brother and he'd gotten into uni but had to quit after he finished his 1st semester bc they couldnt afford it. Thank God, I have a scholarship, and my retired grandpa helps me with a small monthly allowance. They support me so much and I just want to be able to give them back everything that they give and have given to me...
My dad made so many sacrifices for us, specially after mom died, now my brother and I are his safety net; whether he wants to or not 😁 For the record my dad's entire family is very generous when someone is in need but very proud to ask for money when they need it (like willing to be homeless levels of proud), so it's kind of a family tradition to just send money without asking because we know none of us ever will 😅
I relate with you. I'm not obsessed with money because I want to be rich. I just want to help my parents by supporting them financially. By having money, I can help them if covid 19 event happen again even if I lose my job. If they have a broken fan, I can help by buying a new fan. If they don't have enough money to buy groceries, I can provide money to them so they can buy it. It brings me satisfaction that I can give back what they gave me when I was a child. I only realise how precious a penny is when I do a part time job after graduate high school. And I also realize, just how big of a sacrifice my parents did just to make me and my siblings have good education and good childhood life. Now I grow up, I want to return their favor. Its time for them to rest and to live life to the fullest. Its my turn to provide to them.
As a fellow asian and a Filipino, I can relate to this. We cannot stand our family to suffer while we're having a good life. I feel already guilty just thinking about it.
@@archivistsethia9594 That's part of the Asian culture. We give what we can afford to give to our parents and siblings even without them asking or expecting anything from us. Having a good life is a blessing and we are happy if we can share it with our loved ones. It's also our way of showing love, that we are grateful for giving us all their best 💚 And they also do the same 🥰
You are so kind! Love it! Your Family must be extremly proud of you and the choices in life you took. Good luck to you, your relaxo and both of your families!
I’m a white american, and sadly, caring for your elders is something that has left my culture over the years. So many elders are put in nursing homes left alone in their final days and it just breaks my heart. I could NEVER leave my mom and grandpa….my boyfriend lives in South Korea, and I would love to move there with him, but I can’t bring myself to leave my family. I’m at a crossroads and I definitely do not have the money to support them right now, but I will not abandon them just for my happiness. They deserve to enjoy the rest of their life with joy and family surrounding them. Caring for yourself is important, but NEVER forget about those who raised you and made you who you are today. I’m hoping my culture will start to value elders like in the past. 😢❤ I love your videos, Uyen! Thank you so much for sharing this with us. Sending love from Ohio, USA! ❤❤❤
Other perspective. Valuing elders like in the past is quite toxic. Sure, if your parents are great, then it would be great. Unfortunately there are "a lot" of parents treating there children like garbage. It's obviously a minority, but where I live the numbers are: around 6% of children are abused by at least one of their parents (physical or sexual violence or neglect). As one of those children, I am SO grateful that elders aren't as valued as they were in the past. People still look at me weird when I say I broke off contact with my parents, "but they are your parents!", "they love you!', "they probably tried their best!", but if I explain a bit most people come to understand. In the past people would have thought of me as evil for "abandoning" my parents, even though they are the evil ones. Does it suck that some people have great parents and then "abandone" them anyways? Yes, absolutely! Does that mean we should re-instate family as some kind of holy thing? As that would mean around 6% of children suffering even more than they already are, I'd say no. There needs to be some sort of middle ground. Valuing people according to what they gave you. If they gave you love and affection, value them greatly, if they gave you pain and suffering, don't value them at all.
I'm like you too, I want to take care of my mom for as long as she's alive. I didn't spend enough time with my dad, thinking he would always be there, I'm not making that mistake twice. What worries me is that the governement keep pushing back the legal age for retirement. How are we supposed to take care of our parents if we work full time until we're 67?
Just a word of advice, now you think you want to take care of them, but believe me, it's not as easy as people think and you'll need a lot of money. I'm 37, I have been taking care of my cancer patient parents for the past 15 years, I didn't manage to finish university and I have no time for social life or for work even if I wanted to because my mum is disabled and needs everything, I take care of the house and groceries and everything else. It's a full-time job and even if I had a real job I'll have to quit it since I won't have enough time to do everything they need and there's no help form insurances or the health care system. This also means, unless you earn a crap ton of money, you'll have to give up your dreams and the idea of having a family of your own because won't have enough time and money for both and you'll be worried for your future. You'll be tired to the point of exhaustion all the time and always feel down because you'll always feel you would like to do more or make them feel better, many times you'll resent them since they'll be frustrated and angry about the illness and get angry at you and tell you nasty stuff. Luckily my parents have some money of their own so we can pay bills and groceries, but I don't do anything else (no hairdresser, no nails, no Netflix account, rarely new clothes and everything I buy even for birthdays it's necessary not a treat or luxury) This year I started studying again and decided to think about myself because taking care of my parents can last 15-20 more years and I don't want to start my own life with no future or money at 55 or 60. This is why nursing homes can help, you have to pay them, it's not as if they were free, but with competent people that can take care of your loved ones, you can visit, take them to trips and family gathering and have a family and life of your own, which will make them happy too...yes, it's not easy to choose one, but if you have this option and the money to pay for it, you should take it for your own health and mental peace.
I think part of the reason its left the culture is a lot of people have grown up with parents who cared very little about them, just had children because that's the expectation, and it's hard to justify giving up your own life to be a caregiver for someone who did the bare minimum for you. Especially as we get to the online age and people can see oh, maybe my parents werent abusive, but they sure weren't great either. I'm glad you have a family that makes you think that that work in caregiving is worth it though, genuinely, but understand this is why that has "faded" from the culture more and more.
In the US, this is typically called the "black tax". The more financially secure/stable family members help support their poorer family members, but I know it's common in immigrant, Latino, Cambodian, and Southeast Asian families too from personal experience-so I sometimes call it it the "brown tax". I can't just save a little for me, I voluntarily save a lot so I have at LEAST a little for everyone if they need it one day
@@OurFamily-do you know what the ingredients she mixed into the meat? Particularly the fiberglass-looking translucent, flat, short sticks. If the bread is bao that is so, so, so very yummy!
It’s cute, but remember: dont let Asian families guilt trip or gaslight you into the role of the noble samaritan. your money is yours. you earned it. it‘s for yourself and not to be the bank for others. You dont have to share your money. be careful and dont let bloodsuckers use you. Vietnam can be very corrupted and greedy people are everywhere. I’m not talking about your family tho. I never share in VN how much I earn. I always tell them I‘m struggling, so they don‘t ask me for money 😂 I don‘t need the status, I need peace of mind. After my brother married, tons of „family“ members suddenly showed up from nowhere, asking him for help and stuff and he couldnt decline. Collectivism is insanely complicated in comparison to individualism when it comes to finances
The way your voice breaks when talking about saving money to survive made me really sad. We often loose perspective about our privileges so thank you for raising awareness and being so honest about it ❤
Exactly this. The gap of this understanding is tough to make many Europeans understand, despite the majority of people in the world feeling like this, because most of us countries in the world are unstable or have almost or no support for people.
As a Filipino, I can relate. Ever since I was little, I’ve always had the mindset of taking care of my family when I grow up. When I graduate college and get a job, I want to use my money to help pay for my brother’s college tuition once he gets into to college. I’m proud of that mindset because family is very important to me and my culture.
actually we (Vietnamese family) do not look up to the BF or Husband of the girl. Some families look up at "her" or "him" that they could find a good job with the Help from the foreign partner. same same but not the same
There is honor in caring for those who once cared for you. ❤ I'm glad you are also thinking of your family. This done in a healthy way can give you peace of mind and happiness for all. ❤
I have a lifelong overspend issue & Really felt this. At least you're not neurotic about money & saving & don't torture yourself with unnecessary poverty, but I appreciate how you care for your loved ones, now & long term. Good for you.
Ich bin Deutsche, unter unsicheren Umständen aufgewachsen und mir geht es genauso. Für mich sichert Geld mein Überleben, obwohl es hier ein Sozialsysten gibt. Selbst wenn ich viel hätte, könnte ich es niemals für Luxus ausgeben.
As the eldest daughter of a Filipino family, I felt that 😢
I am my parents retirement plan
My friend is Filipino and she takes care of her entire family from here in the states. I think most of her check goes back to the Philippines. Housing, bills and food! For 2 households. 1 is her disabled mother and her brother who cares for her. The other I think are some cousins 🤷♀️ I don’t think she pays for their food but dang she’s not an ATM! She has a big heart. Sadly I think they are taking advantage of her. (The cousins)
Same
@lauriekrebsbach8190 yeah. I would understand the disabled mom since she's so close and she can't work.
But if cousins can work and provide a fair life, then they don't value their dignity if they ask for money 😅
Same and I'm totally fine with taking care of my mom eventually. But for myself, I have no retirement plan. Tbh I hope I die in some tragic accident once my mom passes because I doubt I will ever make enough to have a comfortable retirement.
@@lauriekrebsbach8190the cousins are leeches. The disabled mom and the caretaker(in this case the brother) should be the only ones who needs money.
So true, saving for leasure and saving for survival needs a completely different motivation and patience.
@@misses1768girl shut up
Ily
@@misses1768thou shalt shut up
@@misses1768What does this have to do with this post???
There's another reason many Germans are still so obsessed with saving where they can: history.
Not just the last two wars, but centuries of troubles before that. Whether it was prolonged war like the 30 years war (some areas were nearly completely depopulated by the time it was over), social upheaval (e.g. witch hunts) or just your normal disasters (disease, famine), Germans learned to prepare for the future.
Even if younger Germans don't quite understand what makes their parents and grandparents tick, it's still a long-standing tradition. Germans now save because Germans in the past did.
Some of those savings go into leisure projects. But the bulk typically gets invested or squirreled away in a savings account.
And I'd bet you that German Boyfriend has his own stash as well. It's just that Germans (typically) do *not* talk money with strangers, so we'll never know.
As an Indian, I could relate to this 100%. For me, the elders of my family always come first. I am their safety net, and I’m proud of it!
I hear that you feel proud of supporting your family, but what I’m also hearing is that your family didn’t plan for themselves and instead chose to make you responsible for their future problems. It seems like it’s unfair of them to place that burden on you and almost like they created you for the sole purpose of relieving that burden.
@@CKC298 my comment stands for itself. You sir, or ma’am, have no clue where they have come from and how hard they have worked to give me such an opportunity. They have literally come from eating one meal a day to where they are today. For that I’m forever fucking grateful. Now when I was younger and couldn’t take care of myself, all of them took care of me. I will return the favor in kind, and proudly so!
@@nidhisridhar5453 you didn’t deny what I said though. All of those things can be true (that you’re proud of what they did for you, that you value their sacrifices, and that creating someone so they can take care of you is unfair to the new person).
@@CKC298 if you need me to categorically deny it, let it be known that I deny it! What circumstances we are born in is not something that we can control. I would never call people who feed me as a burden, and it is not unfair! What we need to do as the next generation is ensure we are so strong that we can provide for the next generations, and to the previous, and at the end of it, try and lessen the burden we may cause to the next generation!
@CKC298 I agree with OP. My parents save money where ever they can but the country I come from isn't generous or kind to the elders in terms of their finances. They are saving money and will continue to do so but anything can happen and ruin all that. On top of it, I want to make enough money one day that not only I can act as a secondary safety net for them but also buy them all that they sacrificed for us.
I'm an American and I bought the house beside mine for my mother. We are not rich by any means. These are small homes in a poor neighborhood. But knowing she will never have to worry about a home makes me glad every day.
❤
Hardship to bring out the best in most people, most of the time. We seem to be pretty hard wired to help each other.
In a wealthy society with good social security, we pay our taxes and that fulfils that need for many people. Others might donate to charity occasionally, or even regularly, if they have the means. If a friend has in quarantine (happened a lot recently) you go shopping for them. And that is the most precious gift of them all, your time and caring for someone.
Must be so hard. Wow. Tone deaf much?
do secure urs as well
You are such a blessing for your family!
Yeah I can relate to this as I came from an Asian country where a government/social safety net is almost non-existent and if there is one, it’s barely enough to feed you. I’m so glad most European countries have a safety net so people don’t get incredibly destitute and have enough for housing and food and some things that make them happy. Life is more than just surviving.
Also I can see why you’re helping your family out. I believe it’s something called Filial Piety. It’s something I grew up with. There is an expectation to give back to family and to look after them.
In the West we (white people, anyways) are not exactly known for our filial piety. However I just want to say that I really admire that mindset and I have a bit of it instilled in me as well from my parents. My parents never told me "you have to take care of us when we're elderly", but I witnessed how much time and money they put into taking care of their parents (my grandparents), and it taught me to care for my family. For example, my mom would visit my grandpa every single day when he moved into an old folk's home after my grandma died. Eventually my sister and I started helping out and one of us would spend some time with him daily- we moved him to a place 5 minutes away so it would be an easy trip. I really loved spending time with him and making his day better. I'll 100% do the same for my parents if/when they get old or sick. And I also feel a lot of loyalty to my sister and my cousins as well. Whenever somebody needs help we pitch in.
I really admire cultures where everyone does this!
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
Unfortunately not the case in all European countries, but in general yes
@@marzipanmangoit wont be there anymore in the near future cause we keep importing people from africa and the middle east that are barely literate and drain the systems dry
And yet Asians are generally happier compare to Germans.
Aaaauuugh you are so right! I'm Dutch but I got into heaps of trouble money-wise and when you need that stuff to SURVIVE, it is SO hard to explain that to people who only need extra for extra. I never could even start out thinking about extra! I only ever had basic, if that!
I live in the Netherlands, and seriously... the amount of money you need here just to live is INSANE! Our income is taxed so heavily, yet we still have to pay for so much and can't afford to do other things (like driving on the roads we pay taxes for, or seeing a specialist after paying so much in health insurance, etc.). We can't even think about saving when every last cent is being wrenched out of us in taxes and living costs 😅 It's enough to make appreciate my home country, even if the standard of living is worse there.
@@rebeccaRYX87 for health insurance if your income is low you get most of the monthly cost back though
I live in the Netherlands and I save plenty. It really depends on what you spend it on. If you have a lot of subscriptions cut them all out and find "free" alternatives - it saves a good penny each year.
But I agree that the Netherlands is way too expensive, especially the ridiculous healthcare.
Brit here.
I've always had money problems.
It's hard when other people think you are just being tight (mean with money) when in fact you actually have very little to spare.
I can tell you how many times I've said I can't afford it and they jump to the conclusion that I actually have it but just don't want to spend it.
It seems most always seem to have 'a little extra' to spend on silly, not (survival important things) and they seem to think everyone else has, too.
I am Vietnamese and I get emotional when I saw this. Thanks Uyen.
I'm not Vietnamese, but I got emotional as well.
It's the sad voice 😅
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
I’m Dutch and i even got emotional
I'm not Vietnamese, but i could understand uyen mindset. Because i don't have safety net. Same 😭 i want a lot money so i can survive.
This is so true! Thank you for posting this 😭 Asians are often mocked for being obsessed with money, but it’s because money is our only safety net. When my European friends give me European-style advices like “you should just follow your heart and do what you like” or “you should be more chill”, (sometime with a sense of superiority,) I always feel a bit annoyed. Cuz I don’t have a European citizenship like them.
No, they're shunned because they come to your country and erode your financial system by sending everything they earn home, therefore destroying your country to enrich their own. Which is literally what she admits in this video.
I am so sorry that u felt probably really uncomfortable, because of it. Thankyou for sharing your experience, maybe u could explain that to people, if it happens again. That way they learn how good they actually have it and that not everyone shares the same experiences.❤🌻🌶💙
Is pretty similar here in South America 😪. At this moment life seems hopeless. Right now, if I fall sick, I cannot even get medical attention, I don't have any kind of medical insurance and well, I just have enough money to go and come back from the university campus for this week. Let's hope my health stays ok 😅.
I just try everyday to feel at peace with that fact and the emotions it produces, be thankful because I have another day to be in this world, sharing with people I love and fix my mind in the thing I need to do so that my financial life becomes stable 🙏.
I'm praying from here everything becomes better for you guys there, so that we all can enjoy existence without the worry of how are we going to survive another day 🌼🙆
@@lisal.1114people in such unconsciously talking company propably won't do that, as at the end they may be the ones appearing humiliated.
@@HelpToFindHappyness Since I am one of the europeans that aprechiates other people showing me their experinces. I can say not all of us r like that. I also grew up with parents that struggled financially for a significant part of their life and understand that money has a different meaning to them. It took me a while to even realise how freaking blessed I am due to my cutizenship alone, since I was raised with a lack mentality.
Due to brave comments like the main comment here, I was able to get a healthy realitycheck. Having Healthcare and at least basic level education is a blessing, especially if u can have it without your family being well off. Just most people that know that as normal don't realise how much of a difference that makes. ( not saying things r perfect, how much your family can help u with schoolwork still has an huge impact on a lot of people). Anyway I am gratefull that I was able to learn how other people experince life, that way I can at least try to learn how to have more compassion and emphaty. It also helped me to understand an amazing friend of mine and why that person values money so much. For everyone passing by I wish u an ok day and hope things will get better for u soon, even tho I don't know what u r going through. I can at least try to wish some people well, even if I cant do anything to help.🌬🌹💗😶
I don’t know why it’s so hard for some people to understand that there are those of us who actually do want to take care of our parents and our family when we find ourselves in a better place nobody forces us to do it it doesn’t feel like our duty. It just makes us feel good that we are not stressing about money and neither are our family
True, my mother and rest of my family get on my case because I help support my little granddaughter in Thailand. For health reasons, my son has not been able to work and provide for his family. I am financially secure here in the US and if I can provide for my granddaughter to go to a good school in Thailand and have a better quality of life why not? I can’t take my money to my grave. Still, I never hear the end of it with my family here in the US. ☹️. At least over there my son and his family have universal healthcare. Here, a trip to the ER will leave you bankrupt unless you have health insurance.
It's the other way around in Germany. People think I am a horrible person for not wanting to care for my parents. Not that I didn't already do that for many years, especially financially. Doing that, I wasn't even able to save money for a car. Yet alone for being able to pay for their retirement care. But still, people judge me permanently if I even so much as tell them, that I cut contact.
Like a former boss of mine...who invited everyone for dinner shortly after hiring me, and the topic came up. And they asked me something, that I couldn't answer. So honest like I am, I told them: Sorry, I can't answer that, cos I am not in contact with my parents.
You should have seen her face...and heard what she said. For 5 minutes she tried to convince me, that it was my duty to be a good daughter and stay in contact.🤦♀️
Like I would explain to her the reasons in front of 20 people I just met a few weeks ago at work. I am gonna sit there and explain all the abuse I had been through???! No.
People are so blind sometimes. Imagine their faces if I told them (just for example, cos this does happen all the time sadly) about being the victim of SA at the age of 3. What an evening that would have been!?
It's so hard when they put you in this position, where you can only shut them up, by telling them everything about your trauma. As if you could and as if it was any of their business. And they are sooo offended, if you call them out on that.
Like...one time (wasn't my boss, just some friend of a friend) I couldn't listen anymore to them blaming me and I said: Okay, what would you accept as a reason for not keeping contact? What is horrible enough? Emotional abuse? Physical abuse? Hospitalisation? Or do we need SA to earn the right to cut contact?
I was pretty angry, but I tried to keep cool. And they just watched me with big eyes. And I told them, I wasn't being rethorical and I expect an answer. What would in their opinion be enough to be allowed to cut contact without being blamed and shamed?! They mumbled something I couldn't hear and I just turned my head and started a conversation to another person. It was a party.
Most people here don't get mental health. And they are depressed and brainwashed by their parents often times. Only cos they don't know it, they don't believe that they are been treated badly. So you can't make an argument out of your suffering. They think, you owe your parents in general.
That is not true. Your parents decided to have sex and give birth to you. It's in them! I didn't choose to be born. Non of us do. We have to manage life best we can. And having had no help at all, but instead having been kept from living and had stones put in your path actively by your own parents...I have no regrets cutting contact and I my life has been so much easier without them.
I am sure that people in poor countries have bad homes too. It's not just a problem here in Germany. But maybe it's more rare here. Idk numbers.
But we all have the right to say no.
I agree sometimes it’s just simply your love and care for them not some obligation, which some people don’t really understand. I wonder if they know what “love” exactly is.
Parents that are financially unstable and need support at at the end probably were so when their children where small as well. It's upsetting to be asked to support someone that didn't do everything they could for you when you were a kid. (We had money collectors over quite often but mom was still smoking and spending her money on her pets.)
I'm still struggling financially partly due to stuff my parents did when I was younger. If asked I would still support them since I love them but man would I be upset.
@@Rin-oo9pf I am sorry that is your experience, poverty is hard on everybody be in a family unit. We were also financially unstable but it was because the financial supporter of my family passed away leaving four small children and my mother’s career had been put on pause for seven years and it was during the height recession. Still my mom is the best parent I have ever met and as a parent myself I am in awe of her patience and resilience.
A great phrase I learnt recently: "Save when you can save. Spend when you should spend."
Thank you for that @asleepzz !
Spend when you MUST spend
Duh?
except when you can't save
Schwaben: "Let's cut out that second part"
As an American.... I can completely relate to this. I'm very aware that 1 big medical issue could completely destroy my savings, and although I have a good job now, doesn't mean I will have it forever, they could easily decide to just close the department.
As a european, i noticed americans realizing stuff in the last years (many even moved here) and i thought to myself *Hmm America won't let this slide.
Very true for Americans who plan ahead. Some do not realize and plan, then end up living with financial difficulties after medical need comes. It is sad to see elderly people forced to make hard choices and sacrifices to pay bills that affect their comfort.
Thought this too. It's surprising that, given our country is so wealthy, our families are still so unwilling to share the wealth.. or even able to.
@@cici3147the top 1% percent holding like 90% of the wealth😭😭😭
American here, isn't is sad we identify with this 3world country struggle with the highest GDP in the world (real figures)
You are both wise and kind. Having a large safety net for yourself and for your family is absolutely more important than the latest iPhone, a trip to the beach in winter, or designer coffee. Good for you!
Right 👍
This big financial discussion and sis is just quietly making the most gorgeous steamed buns 😭😭😭
True👍🏼
Being a New Zealander living in the UK I take social security for granted. Thanks for the reminder that this is a privilege, not a right, but one that I wish all humans had.
Hey I visited New Zealand before COVID and it was a beautiful country and the people. I hope to visit again and tour more places.
This should be a right and not a privilege that only a few have access to 😢 Everyone deserves to live a life of dignity and security.
@@MsDebadattaHear hear! A universal basic income, and/or (but really *and*) universal basic services, is an agreement we should all be making with each other.
I dislocated my shoulder while living in the UK. I missed ACC!
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
So lovely….many people aren’t raised to feel those values.. you are a gift ❤
i totally get you as a turkish person. we grew up in places where money wasn't a way for happiness, it was a way of being safe
Agree....cute well-taken care cats all around Turkey surely makes people happy
Same here
@@gialviz3870cats live better than us citizens in turkey lmao. i’m still happy they’re well-taken care tho. 🥺 i make sure cats around my neighborhood are well-taken care too.
@renkinjutsushi9596 This is a really important comment. That has been, and is, for 99% of the worlds population what money is about. Being safe.
This video is misleading. Only privileged Germans who wait for their parents inheritance see it this way.
Most can't save due to high living cost and all are afraid of being destitute in retirement.
This is so relatable. In my head, my savings are not only for me but for my family too. I have enough money to travel but I choose not to, no one asked me to do that but can't shake that 'just in case' or 'what if' feeling
Not Traveling saves money for us and also saves the planet by not polluting.. Air Travel should be for emergencies and not for leisure as they can cause ozone damage 😢 TH-cam is a great place to see distant places in 4K or above..!
@@manutd054The idea of robbing ourselves of the opportunity to experience the world firsthand while corporations freely pollute a million times more than us as individuals is incredibly sad.
@@kikiseo Well said..!
While I don't share the same sentiment, it's not wrong to want to travel. I just feel in the context of this video, some people choose not to indulge even if they can afford it because they prioritize a responsibility they put onto themselves. My partner even disagrees with my way of thinking though but he grew up in a first world country lol@@manutd054
Same. Some peoole might call me stingy because i calculate my spending and more saving. And i think it gets a bit worse after the pandemic
Her love for her family feels warm
I'm from the UK and am incredibly grateful for our safety nets which supported me when I ended up a single parent. But before that I spent 10 years in Africa where you had to be prepared to help your friends as there was no safety nets at all. We should be very grateful for our safety nets, but we should also do our best to be self supporting as much as possible.
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
Where in Africa if I may ask? I'm from Namibia. Our government provides monthly pensioner allowance for the elderly citizens and we have free basic (and even some complex) medical services in all public hospitals.
We save too obvioysly for the future of our children's varsity fees but we struggle because our biggest needs are (very often) for a countless number of young cousins that are living in poverty at the villages. Theyre's hardly ever enough money to afford their basic needs like clothes, decent food, school uniforms, shoes etc. Those that finish school and don't have working parents also always need us cousins to constantly contribute money for their varsity fees. It's so difficult for us in that aspect. And different.
I've always been really impressed with the assistance available for needy families in the UK. We do have welfare in the US but it takes years to get reduced housing or rental assistance, you can get food assistance if you qualify but you have to have kids to get state insurance, any temporary cash assistance is pretty minimal & comes with strings, in my case I had to go on assistance while child support was being processed after my son was born, even if both parties move as fast as possible it takes abt 4-6 months. Law requires the non custodial parent to have child support taken directly from their paycheck so as soon as the payments began coming to me from my son's father the state also started taking an additional sum every month until he paid them back all the cash assistance they had provided me.
There are a lot of reasons, some of this wealth is actually reason why you can't afford the social security in Africa or Asian countries.
@@Opo-D I was in Zambia, but that was a long time ago now, mid-sixties to seventies
i’m black american and can definitely resonate with this. i just want to be able to take care of my grandma and mom when they get too old to take car of themselves.
This is a lovely thought.
America in general. Our safety net is nowhere as good as much of Europe, so kids born to working class parents that are able to do better financially often end up taking care of them
What a good daughter you are. And what a great sibling.
I hope your family understands and cherishes you. Not just for this but for your other merits. You’re a hard worker and an excellent entertainer. Thank you for letting me into your world and provide me with a bit of escapism from my own
I'm a Russian living in France and had this conversation with an Italian guy who told me I was obsessed woth money.
That's because im poor and grew up poor 😅
That's the problem of your country - being the richest in natural deposits and selling gas/oil to everyone around, but the majority is poor and even millions don't have sewage system, drinking water and gas at home 🤦 Your country and you with your natives are such a disgrace.
Привет
I wish for you great abundance!
Russian life expectancy for men plummeted after the fall of the Soviet union. It's never recovered and is to thos day lower then men in North korea. Most of this can be laid at the feet of the US and the rich vultures who came in and picked the bones clean. Few Americans remember this but a few yrs after the collapse of the USSR the Russian people voted in hard left parties to deal with the rampant corruption and in response to American demands their president orchestrated a coup by ordering tanks to be driven thru the Kremlin. So much for spreading democracy.
Same! I'm in Canada and had this conversation with my Canadian hubby. I said I would like to always know where my next meal is coming from because we grew up very poor and there was no social backup.
I'm in the US, and our healthcare is notoriously- awful. It's awful. My bf had to go to the ER without insurance and now he owes $25,000 for that visit. No ambulance ride. We didn't stay in a room "overnight", we were just there for a few hours that happened to be late at night in the ER section. He told me that he would have rather not have been taken to the ER, which is such a common and messed up way of looking at things here. One day we're debt free, the next day -$25k. We don't even own a car right now so it feels hopeless sometimes. Glad to see you taking care of your family.
This is absolutely horrible. I'm so sorry you have to endure this mess, i hope things will be better in the future, for the both of you.
@@golden_leader9227 Thank you so much for the kind words! ❤ We're working on trying to get some insurance!
Not sure how long ago this was, but often if you call the billing department and ask for an itemized invoice, they will adjust overpriced line items and reduce the total if you explain your situation (that you are unable to pay), or they may have forgiveness programs.
@@vlotty9 This is very helpful thank you so much!
The US really is the only "first" world country were you actually have to think about if you can afford to be healthy.
Lovely message as always. :) And now I want to spend some of my saved money on that steamer and find the recipe for the meat buns! Looks delicious.
Sometimes i forget people provide for their families. I come from a very broken and awful family so i would not ever consider sending them money (or recieving it) but good on you for helping yours out.
same here
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
@@misses1768why do you religious people always come in with non sensical beliefs. It’s nice to say God will provide but that is not the norm! It’s actually people and actual cash that is needed to live Not just trust on a deity. In my past people that live saying that usually take advantage of others.
@@glomontero6011
What is exactly nonsensical? That he believes in God or that he believes God provides (in ways and and at times we wouldn't expect). Also I'm pretty sure he's not nearly as nonsensical as the current woke liberal agenda which has been made the new gospel and orthodoxy.
@@davidstrelec2000Both, actually.
I'm sorry dear stranger on the internet, not everyone you encounter here has to believe in God and whatever the bible has to say. It would had been fine if Uyen was like, "I was able to provide for my family with the help of God." But no! She pulled through with her own strength, her belief in her self that if she gets through, Uyen can make sure her family left in Vietnam could at least experience a quarter of what she has in Germany.
Seriously, you and your group of clowns with their dunce hats. Stop calling everything you don't like or agree with liberals !!!
Oh and sorry for my English, I'm not exactly great with articulating my thoughts properly.
Uyen is very noble for helping here family at home and I am glad she is in a situation to do so, hopefully things can turn around in her home country and I wish the best for the people that live there
The fact that this is considered "noble" In the West shows why western society is collapsing
There is also a tradition called Filial Piety. It’s an tradition which expects family and children to look after one another
Everyone conveniently ignores she earns hundreds of thousands of dollars from social media.
@@Muralidharan001She only started her channel when she moved to Germany
I don't see ueyen having the donations tab, gift shop, premium members club, live streams with donations or over doing with adds. So millions dollars hmm.. you haven't seen the other youtubers telling what is their income!!! She doesn't even make a ten K in month bro. Grow a mathematical brain, please😊 Poorest joke in the world😂😂😂
Yeah that's so true, not really caring much about money is a luxury itself you need to afford.
Totally hear you here in America. You’re always closer to homelessness than being a millionaire. God forbid you get sick, or your entire family can lose everything trying to keep you alive. Life insurance is cheaper than health insurance. I’m truly so glad you have a safety net.
@@misses1768and what does that verse have anything to do with the price of tea in China? Or about families being driven into homelessness and poverty due to a serious illness?
I worked at a women's abused/homeless shelter at 18yrs old. It made me realise the majority of people are only a step away from homelessness. Especially, housewives, unfortunately. Some are truly at the mercy of their partners.
It really infuriates me how many abused women came there because none of their so called friends and family would help them and their children. Most people won't help people who are truly in need instead choosing to scornfully judge them without even having one conversation with them.
Some ladies were even active church members. Those made me the most angry. How could their church "friends" turn their backs on them at their most desperate time?! Unforgivable.
@@misses1768what do you do to actually HELP people in need of food, homes, jobs, etc? I'm not talking about other church people who already have all of those things, I'm talking about the ones who have lost everything. Do you help or judge as believers are wont to do? Remember "G-d" is watching and listening and doesn't abide lying.
All I see you doing to verbally diarrheaing passages which do NOT help pay the bills, fill stomachs and bank accounts.
Since you're such a believer get off of social media and go actually DO something to help people.
@@misses1768Reported for spam.
@@spacecat1974 Nothing, they are just one of many religious bots posting spam all over youtube. Report and ignore.
I definitely relate to that. Growing up in a society that doesn’t offer any support or financial security does that to you.
US here: Even though we pay taxes into a social security system, the money isn’t very much; the health insurance is bad, so we can’t rely solely on this government program.
I'm glad you are thinking of them. They've raised you well.
I paid all of my fathers debt after I moved to the USA together with my brothers down payment on a small apartment and had completely forgotten about it until I saw this video.
Damn, I am proud of being helpful, my family shaped me and supported me. I’m happy to do the same for them. Thanks for the reminder
Ive always wanted to do something big like that for a family member. Unfortunately im surviving.
I wish I could do something like you have one day. Honestly , my only dream is to repay my parents. I don't deserve them.
I think I know how you feel.
As my parents got older they gradually started to do less and less for themselves.
They both became more and more forgetful.
There were hundreds of situations that arose due to dementia.
Initially they refused all help saying I was too busy.
It took 10 hours on 2 buses each way to go to them.
Initially I thought my siblings would help out but they didn't.
I gradually took over driving Mum to her two
groups she attended each month which were on the same day.
So my bus trips changed from once every 6 weeks when I had my 4 day weekends to once a month.
So Bathday became the day I got off the bus at 7 am and caught the second bus to near their house.
Dad would see me out his window when I got off the bus. He would drive down the steep hill to pick me up, which I gradually became unable to climb, especially with a bag.
I would give Mum breakfast and remind her over and over about needing a bath.
I was the only person who ever managed to persuade her to have a bath.
Those were very busy, trying to get to two social groups.
What an incredible gift, privilege and opportunity I had to assist my parents with respect, love, patience, skill, reliability and dignity.
These monthly trips went on for several years.
The work left by my siblings to do on my own was an indescribable amount.
I would make many meals each month and put them in recycled plastic containers in the fridge. There was a lot of cleaning, all the doctors appointments, Dad's car registration, driving license renewal and hundreds of other things.
They got carers who helped with medications, dishes, floor cleaning etc which was great.
I was very very fortunate that the carers would ring me when Dad started fretting, and I could then have more information about how my parents were and whether I should take the extra trip there.
I have had a career in nursing and had some great achievements financially, but helping my parents to live blissfully together in their own beloved home looking across the ocean and sky, is easily the most rewarding thing I have done in my life.
The Pacific Island people on the long bus trips always told me I would be blessed.
It was not until my parents died that I understood what this meant. The peace and satisfaction I have with this extraordinary era of my life is immeasurable.
The synagogue group and the genealogy group are two of the main things I did with Mum to connect to the past and future.
The creative ways that challenges are solved is truly wonderful as all carers will know.
Even if a person cannot
help others financially, there is so much people can to to be very useful and deeply meaningful.
As a Yemeni 🇾🇪, I can totally relate with you 💔 Indeed we save money for survival 😢and not to treat ourselves after retirement or when we get older 😢
I'm dating an Indian guy and this difference between eastern and western is brutal. My Brazilian parents did everything they could to be financially stable and never counted on me and my brother, the opposite actually, they left us in a stable situation. My bf is obsessed about sending money to his family and it's all the time worried about everyone's well-being over his. It's kinda hard to plan a life with someone like that bc I feel his family with me will never be his priority, and we'll always be working to keep 2 families. Slowly it's breaking down the relationship.
You're doing an amazing job, your family is fortunate to have you 🥰
Romans 10:9-11 KJV 9 that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. ❤❤❤
I understand you as Thai people. We have poor safety net. We need more safety net as good as German
Edit: oh my. I got so many like. Let root for my country to get ture democracy soon. Cheer for everyone who survived
Everyone conveniently ignores she earns hundreds of thousands of dollars from social media.
@@Muralidharan001social media doesn’t make that much and even so, is it not good to save and have a safety net for ur family?
@@Muralidharan001Ok, and then she pays high German tax to cover that strong safety net. The cost of being a source of financial stability for an undisclosed number of people as an immigrant is still heavy emotionally and mentally regardless of how much you make.
@@Muralidharan001 her views are all from shorts lol
Shorts doesn’t pull in money
@@Muralidharan001😊
It feels so good to know that you’re able to secure your family or future when they weren’t able to do that for you it is truly a blessing and something not many understand or will even do ❤️🙏🏽
I’m so glad my family moved to Germany when I was little. They didn’t give me any financial support after I moved out even though (how I found out later) they are required to by law until I’m 25 years old. Still, thanks to monetary aid from the government I could move out and go to university.
And now I’m chronically ill and can barely get by. I’d be doomed without the social monetary security net. The system is very flawed of course and needs a lot of improvement but if you take the help that’s offered to you you can survive even without having people in your life who care enough to not let you starve. Talking to many folks in other countries I feel so lucky to live here, gooosh.
i totally agree. im from germany too and my family is poor. growing up money was always something existential instead of something for leisure, but im highly aware that being poor in germany is not the same as being poor elsewhere. we get governmental aid, there are ways to get support, and life quality even when u dont have much and have to count every coin is still very high.
You're one of the sweetest people I've ever seen. Your family in Vietnam and your fiance are so lucky to have you.
Aww that is so thoughtful of you🥺 I wish everyone could think just like that 😢
As a Filipino, I definitely relate to this😢 My husband and I are middle class earners. Our witholding taxes are 64% of our income but social security here in the Phil is non-existent for us. That is why I urge my children to finish college then migrate to Germany/Spain/Denmark/ Finland anywhere where social securities are due given😢
its true i want to live in the secure country like norway or finlad
Damn, I didn't know the Philippines was more corrupt than the US with the whole "tax you to hell, but also have fun with the medical bills and retirement dream"
Don't choose Germany. Our system gets worse by the day. I heard good things about the Netherlands and also Denmark, Sweden, Finland and Norway. Forget Germany, we've got lots of troubles.
Good
So you want to immigrate to my country in order to benefit from our hard work? Not interested in culture, history, language, people? Ask yourself this: do you want to BECOME A GERMAN and leave your past and origins behind completely? If not, please reconsider your plan.
I love how she is making bao while talking about this topic. She is showing us how she is saving money making her own bao while talking about it. The baos look really good too !
I'd like to know how to make them
@@christineedwards5175same, it looks so good.
Do you know what the electric steamer she cooked them in is called? I tried googling but no luck
Nvm I found it with "stainless steel food steamer appliances"
@hola542 can you post the brand please? Thank you.
@@Ipanda86 sorry, I couldn't find her exact brand, just other brands doing similar things
As a disabled American my greatest fear has been when I’m no longer able to rely on myself who will I rely on. And the list is not long. So my only hope is to make enough money to take care of my mom and myself. I don’t want to be sick again and fight to keep my job so I have a dinky, empty apartment to go back to and then have to work twice as hard to get back to livable. I need to know that I can rest when I should be resting.
When people say money doesn’t buy happiness of course it doesn’t. I only live for my family. But everyone deserves a decent living. Don’t make yourself feel bad for wanting a good life for yourself and your family. As long as you’re not taking much more than you need and your heart is in the right place that phrase wasn’t meant for you.
This also gets truer and truer for many Germans. Many Germans already can’t live off the retirement payments they recive and the number of people affected by that will constantly grow.
I‘ve grown up with two parents who couldn’t afford most of the nice things that still so many Germans take for granted. Around me kids were sad and angry because they family only could afford one family holiday in Italy this year. While my family wasn’t able in years to afford holiday away from our place.
Still a lot of my German friends don’t understand how careful I am with spending money even though I’m German myself.
Some invite me for dinner at an affordable restaurant. Some don’t even spend time with me any more since to them it’s just enerving that I can’t just afford everything they take for granted.
Thank you for being a voice. Someone needs to tell people about this side, too! One is out of social circles, if they can’t afford the life style.
There is a culture of going out and spending money now that is getting crazy, people can't afford a home but eat out many times a week, don't even know how to cook and even how to have fun and spend time with friends without spending money it's ridiculous... Maybe you are much better off without such company. True happiness is sometimes in fewer but true friends and small things that don't cost a lot of money... I usually just invite my friends for tea in my house and bake a cake or make some pancakes it costs so little and if I want to go out I go to the beach or the natural parks to take a walk and bring a picnic basket and the dogs and I am the happiest person... but I am lucky because it's beautiful where I live but believe me here in Portugal we know how to make the best use of little money and enjoy ourselves 😅 you can spend the day at a café drinking just one coffee for less than 1 euro... The old ladies all do it 😉
Poverty is very isolating - particularly so in a society in which there is a very uneven distribution of wealth.
If everyone is poor, they can get together with the expectation that they won't be spending a lot of money and that no one is going to be wearing fancy clothes, etc.
But if you are the one person in your social circle who doesn't have a lot of money, you are going to end up avoiding socialising because you can't do "your part" in group activities.
Yep. I say it as a German who actually got into the position to rely on the so called social net. They make you jump through so many hoops that you save yourself or are on the absolute bottom until it catches you.
I applied for unemployment after paying for it for literally years and was denied because aparently I only filed for unemploment money but did not file a separate application of being unemployed. And it took them 6 weeks to write me that letter of rejection. Its a joke.
Also from Germany, my grandma actually taught me how to save up money even if it looks like one can’t afford it. Got taught how to cook and bake according to what’s on sale because it’s in season, and how to can it. What to always stock up when it’s price reduced because it can stay in the cupboard for a long time, because that way there will even be food in the house when there is no food in the store anymore, or when the food prices go up to much. Was extremely helpful during the pandemic when the store’s shelves were empty and were overpriced after they finally restocked again. I meanwhile added stuff like portable gas cooker and other stuff useful when there is a blackout.
I should also add that it’s often cheaper to buy in bulk, that’s extremely helpful, since that way I safe money and have enough ingredients to can food for the cupboard.
Sadly in Germany that seems to be lost knowledge.
"So I can become the safety net for my family at home" ...boy. wow, that line hit surprisingly hard
My grandparents immigrated from France to raise me in America after my father moved there and was a single dad with Asperger’s Syndrome. I’m now their safety net and making them proud working in Tech
I really admire the dedication I see in people who have immigrated here to Canada, to provide as much extra as possible for family members back in their home country who don't have the same opportunities. ❤ What you are doing for your family is amazing.
I can relate to this as a immigrant daughter, and the eldest you feel like you need to work hard to repay your families sacrifices...You are the sweetest ❤
I’m sure they sacrificed for her so it seems right to me.
Think about your families sacrifices a moment. That's the common wealth of a nation. Imagine if someone moved in tomorrow and demanded equal treatment, and equal access, to the wealth of your family. Annoying? Criminal? Yes. This is the endless genocidal displacement migration of scab labour brought in by megacorps and politicians. The common wealth of Germany is why it's currency is so high. Because of all the blood,, sweat, and tears of those who sacrificed their life working hard beforehand. She should be in Vietnam doing the same thing. Not stealing Germany's wealth to send it to Vietnam.
@@avril.227 but they chose to have a child. The kid didn’t choose to be alive so that doesn’t make sense.
@@kananinations6555true
You're a good person. I love watching your videos because of your authenticity.
I'm sorry we live in a world where children need to help aging parents financially. You're a good kid ❤
It's the way the world has always been. Parents take care of their children then children take care of their parents.
That's how the world was made to be. It's just some people are selfish
(I'm not talking about people who has abuser family)
In my hometown, it was also in part because parents financially support their children not only until they reach adulthood (17 years old in my country), but also through college (if student debt is neccessary, parents would be the one taking the debt and paying it, not the child) and afterward until they are financially stable themselves. Then parents also usually help with wedding and getting the first house. It´s not uncommon for someone in their 20+ to still living with their parents and fully financially relying on the parents.
That help said children to start their independent life, when they got their first job, without worrying about debt or anything like that. But that also means parents can´t really saving up for their retirement.
So I think it´s just fair that in turn, the children would then help their elderly parents when they could no longer support themselves.
It's what libertarians think the world should be. They have a very individualist mindset and think that tax is theft. Meaning no social welfare.
It's the way it's always been, but countries haven't always been as wealthy as they are now. That wealth should be used on the people, since our labor helps to create it
You’re a good family member for continuing to take care of your family even though to live so far away now. Wishing you, your boyfriend and your family all the best.
That makes so much sense! Thanks for sharing!
I feel this as a former homeless person. I wasn’t on the streets, but I put everything I had into saving for my own place so that I could get my own place. I’m very frugal with money even now, and always keep money set aside for emergencies.
Could we possibly get a recipe for those amazing looking dumplings?
Yes please, share
Dumplings? I think that was meatbun 😅
They look like bapao
Yes please! Buying premade ones are expensive oversea!
Me too please
You are a good person and a great daughter. Your family must be proud.
As an Argentinean immigrant, I understand you perfectly. My country is i financially unstable and I want to be able to help my loved ones. Keep working and saving but don’t forget to care for yourself too ❤
Thank you, for getting so personal. I find it respectable, and so kind to not be doing it for you- but to secure the future for your family. ❤
It’s really impressive that you can save for your family and your compassion is inspirational
I have ADHD bad, but I'm loyal, dedicated and hard working. I just started a new job at a family owned Japanese sushi restaurant and my boss is amazing. The Asian culture is beautiful to me, and instead of getting angry with me bc I started something and forgot to finish they HELP me and we all work together as a team and it is so perfect and I'm so happy ❤. We actually care about our customers, we serve extremely high quality food and I'm so impressed by everything lol. The point of this comment was to say how when I get fat tips my boss and coworkers are happy for me and we all want each other to succeed and make money and it's such a different atmosphere from my old lame corporate job.
Good for you Angie! Congrats
be careful....just because theyre nice now doesnt mean they always will be.
This was very honest, and sincere, and kind. I found it very moving to be honest. I wish you and your partner good health, and all sorts of success
Ooh wow
Yes, I've definitely inherited the "save money to survive" mentality - both my grandparents were one in 8 and very poor, and still save everything even though they have lots of money
Completely understand. You should be very proud of all you have achieved. Your videos always make my day better.
Sometimes I wish we could take all the good qualities of each country and just put them together and make it universal. I love how every country and culture has some wholesome thing that they do. I think it’s really sweet that taking care of family and parents is part of a lot, if not all, Asian cultures.
Asian, Arab, Latin, African. It's only not there in the west 😢
@oceanofdevotion1952
5
The quality I would love to see the most is Palestinians strength
@@alaaaaa4132 And the rest of the worlds common sense not to use it for trying to blow up your neighbour
You're awesome for that and you deserve a lot of respect for this! Hope you know that
It's truly a blessing growing up in a rich ass country
Even when you're poor, you're still better off than most of the world
We should appreciate that more
I can relate to this. Between grad studies and a previous difficult employment situation, having money is really about safety for me. Certainly it means I can do fun things, but in the end, it's really about ensuring some level of control in my life.
Being the elders daughter of Indian parents I can relate to you
This is true for me too. I’m my dad’s durable power of attorney since he had a major accident in 2018 when it snapped me into the reality that we don’t have a good retirement plan in the US either unless you save money & my parents did all they could for me and my sisters including use the savings to pay for things we needed and in hard times which didn’t leave them with much. I know I’m their future bc in no way could I not work as hard as I can so my parents can finally afford to relax. Their in their 60s and they still worry about money & my dad works part time bc of it. I feel this
True asian heart. We take care of our family
Considering what she said, you have no choice.
I love you so much for this. You’re the sweetest soul.
As a foreing student from south america, this felt so true to me. I just got a job recently so I can meet my ends bc situation in this country has gotten kinda tough specially for foreigners, but I wish I could get some extra coins to send back home. I have a youger brother and he'd gotten into uni but had to quit after he finished his 1st semester bc they couldnt afford it. Thank God, I have a scholarship, and my retired grandpa helps me with a small monthly allowance. They support me so much and I just want to be able to give them back everything that they give and have given to me...
My dad made so many sacrifices for us, specially after mom died, now my brother and I are his safety net; whether he wants to or not 😁
For the record my dad's entire family is very generous when someone is in need but very proud to ask for money when they need it (like willing to be homeless levels of proud), so it's kind of a family tradition to just send money without asking because we know none of us ever will 😅
You're so wholesome. I love your perspective
I relate with you. I'm not obsessed with money because I want to be rich. I just want to help my parents by supporting them financially. By having money, I can help them if covid 19 event happen again even if I lose my job. If they have a broken fan, I can help by buying a new fan. If they don't have enough money to buy groceries, I can provide money to them so they can buy it. It brings me satisfaction that I can give back what they gave me when I was a child. I only realise how precious a penny is when I do a part time job after graduate high school. And I also realize, just how big of a sacrifice my parents did just to make me and my siblings have good education and good childhood life. Now I grow up, I want to return their favor. Its time for them to rest and to live life to the fullest. Its my turn to provide to them.
As a fellow asian and a Filipino, I can relate to this. We cannot stand our family to suffer while we're having a good life. I feel already guilty just thinking about it.
Your circumstances are your own. There life is their own. You cannot trap yourself into that guilt. You want better for them and that is lovely.
@@archivistsethia9594 That's part of the Asian culture. We give what we can afford to give to our parents and siblings even without them asking or expecting anything from us. Having a good life is a blessing and we are happy if we can share it with our loved ones. It's also our way of showing love, that we are grateful for giving us all their best 💚 And they also do the same 🥰
@@r.francisco2014 And it’s so beautiful. All the Filipinos I know are so generous in love and in spirit.
@@archivistsethia9594 Thank you so much for your kind words ☺️ Wishing you happiness all the world could give 💚
You are so kind! Love it! Your Family must be extremly proud of you and the choices in life you took. Good luck to you, your relaxo and both of your families!
I’m a white american, and sadly, caring for your elders is something that has left my culture over the years. So many elders are put in nursing homes left alone in their final days and it just breaks my heart. I could NEVER leave my mom and grandpa….my boyfriend lives in South Korea, and I would love to move there with him, but I can’t bring myself to leave my family. I’m at a crossroads and I definitely do not have the money to support them right now, but I will not abandon them just for my happiness. They deserve to enjoy the rest of their life with joy and family surrounding them. Caring for yourself is important, but NEVER forget about those who raised you and made you who you are today. I’m hoping my culture will start to value elders like in the past. 😢❤ I love your videos, Uyen! Thank you so much for sharing this with us. Sending love from Ohio, USA! ❤❤❤
Other perspective. Valuing elders like in the past is quite toxic. Sure, if your parents are great, then it would be great. Unfortunately there are "a lot" of parents treating there children like garbage. It's obviously a minority, but where I live the numbers are: around 6% of children are abused by at least one of their parents (physical or sexual violence or neglect). As one of those children, I am SO grateful that elders aren't as valued as they were in the past. People still look at me weird when I say I broke off contact with my parents, "but they are your parents!", "they love you!', "they probably tried their best!", but if I explain a bit most people come to understand. In the past people would have thought of me as evil for "abandoning" my parents, even though they are the evil ones.
Does it suck that some people have great parents and then "abandone" them anyways? Yes, absolutely! Does that mean we should re-instate family as some kind of holy thing? As that would mean around 6% of children suffering even more than they already are, I'd say no.
There needs to be some sort of middle ground. Valuing people according to what they gave you. If they gave you love and affection, value them greatly, if they gave you pain and suffering, don't value them at all.
I'm like you too, I want to take care of my mom for as long as she's alive. I didn't spend enough time with my dad, thinking he would always be there, I'm not making that mistake twice. What worries me is that the governement keep pushing back the legal age for retirement. How are we supposed to take care of our parents if we work full time until we're 67?
Nice profile pic
Just a word of advice, now you think you want to take care of them, but believe me, it's not as easy as people think and you'll need a lot of money. I'm 37, I have been taking care of my cancer patient parents for the past 15 years, I didn't manage to finish university and I have no time for social life or for work even if I wanted to because my mum is disabled and needs everything, I take care of the house and groceries and everything else. It's a full-time job and even if I had a real job I'll have to quit it since I won't have enough time to do everything they need and there's no help form insurances or the health care system. This also means, unless you earn a crap ton of money, you'll have to give up your dreams and the idea of having a family of your own because won't have enough time and money for both and you'll be worried for your future. You'll be tired to the point of exhaustion all the time and always feel down because you'll always feel you would like to do more or make them feel better, many times you'll resent them since they'll be frustrated and angry about the illness and get angry at you and tell you nasty stuff. Luckily my parents have some money of their own so we can pay bills and groceries, but I don't do anything else (no hairdresser, no nails, no Netflix account, rarely new clothes and everything I buy even for birthdays it's necessary not a treat or luxury)
This year I started studying again and decided to think about myself because taking care of my parents can last 15-20 more years and I don't want to start my own life with no future or money at 55 or 60. This is why nursing homes can help, you have to pay them, it's not as if they were free, but with competent people that can take care of your loved ones, you can visit, take them to trips and family gathering and have a family and life of your own, which will make them happy too...yes, it's not easy to choose one, but if you have this option and the money to pay for it, you should take it for your own health and mental peace.
I think part of the reason its left the culture is a lot of people have grown up with parents who cared very little about them, just had children because that's the expectation, and it's hard to justify giving up your own life to be a caregiver for someone who did the bare minimum for you. Especially as we get to the online age and people can see oh, maybe my parents werent abusive, but they sure weren't great either. I'm glad you have a family that makes you think that that work in caregiving is worth it though, genuinely, but understand this is why that has "faded" from the culture more and more.
As someone who grew up where there's NO social security, I definitely can relate.
Those buns look so good 😳 drop the recipe
I love how chill and comfortable you always look and act. Me and my lady always be lounging around doin everything in pj's and b ball shorts lol
In the US, this is typically called the "black tax". The more financially secure/stable family members help support their poorer family members, but I know it's common in immigrant, Latino, Cambodian, and Southeast Asian families too from personal experience-so I sometimes call it it the "brown tax". I can't just save a little for me, I voluntarily save a lot so I have at LEAST a little for everyone if they need it one day
You can add East and South Europe to the tax name
I don't know what you are cooking /eating, but I WANT THIS.
Steamed bun with meat, it has many names in many languages.
I think it's called Bao?
She makes it look so easy to make too.
Banh bao in vietnamese
@@OurFamily-do you know what the ingredients she mixed into the meat? Particularly the fiberglass-looking translucent, flat, short sticks.
If the bread is bao that is so, so, so very yummy!
Sad yet wholesome, good luck out there pals💖
It’s cute, but remember: dont let Asian families guilt trip or gaslight you into the role of the noble samaritan. your money is yours. you earned it. it‘s for yourself and not to be the bank for others. You dont have to share your money. be careful and dont let bloodsuckers use you. Vietnam can be very corrupted and greedy people are everywhere. I’m not talking about your family tho. I never share in VN how much I earn. I always tell them I‘m struggling, so they don‘t ask me for money 😂 I don‘t need the status, I need peace of mind. After my brother married, tons of „family“ members suddenly showed up from nowhere, asking him for help and stuff and he couldnt decline. Collectivism is insanely complicated in comparison to individualism when it comes to finances
I am Asian and i can totally relate!! However successful i get i know in my heart i wont be one to just spend mindlessly
This video is so good! It is like we hear you thinking, while you are cooking.
You’re a good person! I think if your family were to watch this short, they would shed happy tears. 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
This made me tear up. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself here
You made me emotional. I'm an Indian. Life is hard for Eastern people
The way your voice breaks when talking about saving money to survive made me really sad. We often loose perspective about our privileges so thank you for raising awareness and being so honest about it ❤
That's lovely of you. You care a lot for your family 🥰
Exactly this. The gap of this understanding is tough to make many Europeans understand, despite the majority of people in the world feeling like this, because most of us countries in the world are unstable or have almost or no support for people.
As a Filipino, I can relate. Ever since I was little, I’ve always had the mindset of taking care of my family when I grow up. When I graduate college and get a job, I want to use my money to help pay for my brother’s college tuition once he gets into to college. I’m proud of that mindset because family is very important to me and my culture.
"nobody is forcing me" no one forces you cuz everyone knows how powerful you are holding your German BF hostage (with love)
9th time seeing you today
@@Pardon_me11My 5th, i only watched shorts for an hour today
actually we (Vietnamese family) do not look up to the BF or Husband of the girl. Some families look up at "her" or "him" that they could find a good job with the Help from the foreign partner.
same same but not the same
Not just the story, the video itself is so asthetically pleasing that I couldn't stop watching it 4 times in a row.
people who love her
👇
There is honor in caring for those who once cared for you. ❤ I'm glad you are also thinking of your family. This done in a healthy way can give you peace of mind and happiness for all. ❤
I have a lifelong overspend issue & Really felt this. At least you're not neurotic about money & saving & don't torture yourself with unnecessary poverty, but I appreciate how you care for your loved ones, now & long term. Good for you.
Ich bin Deutsche, unter unsicheren Umständen aufgewachsen und mir geht es genauso. Für mich sichert Geld mein Überleben, obwohl es hier ein Sozialsysten gibt. Selbst wenn ich viel hätte, könnte ich es niemals für Luxus ausgeben.
Ostdeutsche? Mir zu..
I love the idea of everyone caring for and helping each other. Sweet kind woman ❤
This deserves to be shared with the world.
As a NYEr, born and raised here since 1987’, you just made me tear up. I understand. Much love Uyen ❤