Helloooo I am a Hongkonger and live in UK. I love your videos. Don't let idiots ruin your days. No matter thin, fit or fat, this is none of 3rd party's business. I am a bag-lover too. As long as our financial situation allows us to buy something and make us happy. Why not?! Support you always!! 😘😍🤩
I’m sorry that happened to you. That can be so hurtful. I really love the lens with which you decided to view the situation. I think you must be a very kind and compassionate person. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much. I try to look at things with empathy as not many people out there set out to be nasty so it’s mainly how we deal with these things that’s important. With age comes tolerance. X
Really appreciate your authentic courageous and compassionate response to this. The real story is how confident and healthy you’ve become in what is a relatively short amount of time! You’re an inspiration!
What a mature way to address this, it truly speaks of your character to put yourself into his shoes and assume the best intentions from his side. How great you’re sharing this experience with all of us, it is really inspiring to see you share your vulnerability 🌹 Besides: you look stunning appearance-wise first of all, no question about that, and what’s even better is your inner beauty and passion that shine through and radiates from you so clearly, amplifying the beauty you already have. When you said you were much less confident a year ago (measured from the making of this video) I couldn’t believe it. You have everything to be confident about. Thanks for this channel, it’s lovely to watch your videos and speak about your passion ❤
Dayle thank you so much. That means a lot. As I get older I have learned to reflect and reframe and that way it helps me deal with things in a less bitter and negative way. Its all good. Love ya babes 😘
Awwww!! Deb!!! I’m SO glad you’re not taking it badly, especially when I think back to where you were mentally a year ago, you’re right, it would have totally knocked you down. You’ve come such a long way and you’ve done and look AMAZING!!! ❤ xx
Thanks love! I remember so many chats with you back then. I was definitely not in a good place. I’ve dragged myself out of that place and feel so much more confidence. Thanks for supporting me it doesn’t go unnoticed my love x
I had to pull over and stop the car to comment. First time watching your channel. First, there is nothing big about you and secondly I think the smaller bag looks better on you. American here and love your accent. So elegant. Could listen to you all day. ❤
The bags are gorgeous, esp the olive green. I wonder if he was (like you mentioned) trying to just be helpful. I don’t feel that saying a person is “not petit” is an insult in anyway, but when he went on to say “you’re bigger” that part is not acceptable. I don’t believe he meant it bad, he may have just wanted you to have the most flattering bag for your build, in his opinion.I had an SA tell me not to choose the mini size, because as as a 6’0 tall man it wouldn’t “look right”, I bought the mini anyways because I liked it.
Can’t wait for the unboxings! As for the SA who did not choose his words wisely I am happy you aren’t taking it to heart. People now a days really don’t think before they speak in my opinion. You keep on shining and beaming and enjoy all your new bags! Congrats! 🎉👜💖🫶😊
Hi Deb, I absolutely love you and your videos. You are so wonderful and are beautiful. As a person who has been in recovery from an eating disorder I completely understand why you reacted the way you did. I completely agree with what your PT said. It’s not a bad thing to have a bigger body frame at all. It’s the way society has trained us to think that skinny is better. I’m bigger than I have ever been at the moment and that’s because I’m giving my body the energy it needs. Our brain and body needs fuel and the important thing is that we are looking after our body, not how big it is ❤
Thank you so much for your kind words. This is why people should be mindful of their words as no one knows what that person might be going through. Keep doing you my love!
I think both Loewe bags look great on you. I can see why it is hard to make a decision! Thank you for your channel. I really enjoy your content and your personality!
So sorry this happened to you. I’m a size 14/16 and I would choose the smaller crossbody bag for me. The larger hobo looks like too much bag to lug around. I hate it when sales associates tell me that a certain outfit or bag makes me look slimmer. I need to stop asking sales associates for advice too. You look wonderful! Your taste is exquisite.❤️
The only section for petite is clothing-----not purses. I get it, about the big bag and looking in proportion, but the salesperson needed to say, what bag size suits your lifestyle better for what you carry on the daily, but go smaller if it's for a special occasion because you don't need to kitchem sink to go to a party.
Many years ago, I needed a dress for a special occasion, and I went to a store in Brooklyn, NY. The sales person who helped me asked what size I was, and I told her a 16. She brought me a few dresses that were really ugly. I said no, thank you, but I want something flattering, something that looks nice on me. She said “You’re not supposed to look nice when you are a 16”.😮😮😮 So rude!!! I left the store very embarrassed. I was with my teenage daughters. It was mortifying!!!
The way you described the incident it does sound like he was trying to help and didn't mean to be offensive. As I'm watching I'm trying to think of how I might have worded things differently if I were him. Maybe something about the larger bag being more proportional to your frame? That could bring up the same negative connotations, though. I don't know. It's a tricky one. Good that you talked to people about it and reframed how you're processing it. Can't wait to see the vlogs and unboxings!
Aw Hi Autumn - thank you so much for watching. Yes it was tricky as I felt he was trying to help. He could have simply said he preferred the larger one. In any case it hit a nerve because of how I feel about myself. I’m learning to let things go and realise that I can choose how I deal with things. It’s actually very freeing! X
Really sorry you had to have this experience and thank you for sharing it - so important to call out these types of inappropriate behaviour. Looking forward to the unboxings ❤❤❤
So sorry to hear about the way you were treated. No one deserves that. BTW, I found you through Amelia and Meredith. I love to support small channels with excellent content!
I always ask another shopper because then have no stake in the game. That's vile of them. I as a 6'2 375 lb man don't think I've ever had an employee of a store say something like that to me. That seems like the sort of thing that only happens to women and I am so so sorry. I know I have asked employees about the fit of clothing and received honest remarks about that but never has my weight or size been referenced in regards to a bag.
Wow I would of kicked off! Well done for keeping Your cool and just leaving❤ so sorry that happened to You! He really did not think before he spoke did He…. Xxx
Sorry to hear that, I had a SA in Chanel in Florida tell me when I was deciding between a mini and a med CF…”well for your size you should go for the jumbo!”. I said well I am not not looking for a jumbo and left the store w/o buying anything.
I’m sorry. I was once introduced in the gym to a trainer who told me that he was sure he could design an exercise and diet plan for me to help me get off the excess weight and get fit. One, I had not asked for that advice. Two, I doing a tour because I wanted to improve my marathon pace (as the last marathon I had run I hadn’t met my goal of cracking 4 hours). And, three I’d lost 4 stone just a few years prior and I didn’t need help with my diet. Some people make assumptions and are moron. Not bad just morons,
Yes you’re right. People make assumptions based on what society tells us we ‘should’ be or they make assumptions based on how they feel. How about finding out the persons motivation for being there first before assuming. There are many many reasons why I go training x
Oh my, I am so sorry you were treated in such a thoughtless and rude way. Your outlook is amazing, and you are more understanding than most would be, myself included. I found you via Gwenny, Dayle, Amelia, Meredith, etc, and subscribed right away!! ❤ Looking forward to your vlogs and unboxings!
Welcome to the fam! So glad you’ve found me. Thank you so much for your kind words. I’ve learned as I get older it’s better for me to let things go. Let go of the bitterness as I would dwell on it and the other person would have not given it any energy. Thank you for your comments and hope you enjoy the videos. Lots to come! X
I‘m very sorry to hear what happened. This guy needs a proper training in Customer Experience!!! Both bags looked really gorgeous on you. Personally I preferred the smaller one in green for every day. Last weekend, I was also in a Loewe store in my country. It wasn’t the first time that I compared bags and belts, the SA‘s always described their products how to use it etc. (traveling, everyday etc.) This shouldn’t happen nowadays - unbelievable 😢.
I'm sorry to hear about the shaming incident, Deb. Yes the SA did not choose the right words or ask further questions to see what you plan to use the bag for but I'm glad to hear you are not bothered by it now and just letting you know that you look great. The changes are showing. The roses are beautiful. I've bought from Rose Forever before for myself and as gifts and they are stunning. Such a wonderful thing that the TH-camrs met up! I have to catch the other videos. I'm subscribed to almost all of the TH-camrs mentioned and love your and their chanels. Can't wait to see what you picked up. Sometimes you can't miss out on an opportunity when it comes up and looking forward to your amazing finds. Xx
Good for you for not letting this experience ruin your day. It’s true he was just making a statement based on his observation but he was clearly a bit clueless as to what is and isn’t appropriate to say or how to phrase it. He may very well have been trying to help but it still was not an appropriate thing to say because many people are very sensitive about their body size. But I liked the way your trainer looked at it and I agree with her. People come in all shapes and sizes and that’s ok. By the way both bags looked good on you. The small one looked great and if anything, the large one looked pretty large on your frame. Glad you had a wonderful time and I can’t wait to see what you bought!
You're the best Deb. I love your outlook and I am appalled by the SA's comments. Thoughtless and inconsiderate come to mind and how perfect that you simply walked out. Yep, no thank you! We have an endless selection of beautiful bags and to think that anyone selling those bags would be so ill-mannered is beyond me. Buh bye to the SA and perhaps Loewe needs to rethink their hiring decision.
Thank you! I figured no need to be sad and dwell on it. He will have not thought any more about it I’m sure. Flippant comments can only harm if we let them.
You should have said "all of this fabulousness will not fit into a petite body". I think he just misspoke, I don't think he meant any harm. I think we all say things where we wish we could rephrase them. Glad you had fun.
Yes, I put the spin on it that your size at 14-16 is not a negative thing, it just a statement of fact in comparison to a 0-2 that also exist. Just like a certain hairstyle might go better with straight hair vs curly hair (some people could feel sensitive to that) and certain contouring looks better on certain face shapes. I know size is a sensitive thing (me being a a very very large woman) but maybe we all need to stop buying into the word fat as anything other than a description.
Yes it’s true. Factually I am bigger than some people. I choose not to see this as a bad thing but as I have been insecure in the past it does hit a nerve. I think he was clumsy with his words. X
Sending hugs your way. As a fellow 14/16 (UK size), I've also had some thin SAs look sideways or not be that helpful, or downright rude. I've also had lovely SAs who were loads of fun! I don't put up with rude sales staff. It's them, not you. If they say something rude, you can say "that was rude," and make stern eye contact. Ask for another SA with a better disposition if you still want to shop in the store. If not, just walk out (like you did, and I applaud that!). No item is worth rude sales staff ... ever. Go somewhere else (Selfridges, Harrods, etc) and you may have a much better experience! Can't wait to see the unveiling! (-: You have worked hard and deserve respect ... (-:
I am so sorry to hear that this SA said this to you and phrased their words in this way. In all honesty looking at the video, I prefer the smaller bag given versatility and it is still a throw over the shoulder easy bag.
What a stupid, insensitive thing to say. He is clearly also not good at his job because his words made him miss out on a sale.. I’m sure this is not the first time he has either offended or gotten in trouble in his life with his choice of words. You look amazing and I’m so glad your confidence has grown! Looking forward to the unboxings!
Hi! Would you be open to calling the gentleman and kindly share with him how his words made you feel? It could give him an opportunity to change his words going fwd.
i'm late to this video. It's great that you are being reflective and considering the genuinely helpful spirit in which this poorly worded comment was offered. I would think anyone especially in fashion would know better.
Good for you to leaving. How horrible to say that. You look amazing and can’t understand why someone would say that. I prefer the smaller one on you. But its personal preference. You are so beautiful don’t ever let anyone break you down.
If anyone ever referred to me as ‘big’ I’d say ‘Thank you’ and flex a bicep. 💪🏻❤️ It’s interesting how we, as women, oftentimes think of ‘big’ as being bad. Big can mean tall and/or strong which I’m cool with.😁 But, I agree, it was a clumsy use of words from the Sales Associate because it can be interpreted in different ways and could be triggering. For what it’s worth, I think you look fabulous. 💖
Good grief. Sorry that happened! You handled it well & I can believe it may have been just his thoughtless attempt at phrasing, as you’re positing. Both bags looked great on you! I always prefer larger bags except when I want to crossbody it often. Sooo I’m no help here. 😅 Great rules for shopping! Sticking to them would be hard for most of us. 🤦♀️
Thank you so much. Yes tnink he was just clumsy with his words. Learning to let things wash over me. It’s a happier place to be. Loved both sizes of the bag. It is beautiful x
I am sorry this happened to you. He was inconsiderate, he could have just said you are tall and both bags look good on you. Which they do, both were very nice! And you look gorgeous by the way! Nobody can make such remarks. Your roses are bautiful. i cant wait for your unboxing:-)
Yes! Who decides that big is bad and small is good? Let’s turn it on its head - all bodies are beautiful. If I choose to lose weight it’s for my health and energy not to fit into society’s vision of what I should be!
You are correct that it is so important to be careful with one's words. Overall, I think commenting on anyone's appearance ever is not a great idea. Our appearance is the least interesting thing about us. At the same time, I also think we do need to challenge conventional body ideals and turning this on its head is the best approach. Why is being petite good and being big is bad? Why is being young good and old bad? These ideas are patriarchal and antiquated. I'm going to own my grey hair, you own your shape, and we will all be happier if we are coming at life from a place of self acceptance 🙂
Love this!!!! Yes my personal trainer said a similar thing. Who decides that big is bad and small is more acceptable. It’s antiquated ideals that need to disappear. X
Certain clients are targeted for pushing the more expensive items and the ones that aren’t selling. Managers signal to sales associates which clients to target for these items. Be careful ❤
Gurrrl! That SA was out of line but this would be a teaching moment for you to educate that SA on his choice of words. In fact I might even try to track him down to have a quick chat with him. People do not think before they speak especially about anyones body shape.
I'm sorry that happened to you. I don't think it was to shame you, but I totally agree it could have been done much more elegantly. You would think people in luxury retail would know that. Hope you're feeling good about your body and all the amazing things it is doing for you!!!
My opinion about how much level someone sensitive about word is all depend on different individual people. If the SA told me I am not petite and this bag suits my bigger body frame. I ok with it. Many years ago, a taxi driver told me I was fat and should loose some weight. When i argued with my ex, he said I am fat c..t. Those comments make me angry and upset. Can call me weird. Everyone hate the pandemic and lock down, but I love it. It totally changed my life. Some examples life changing are, I loose alot weight (size 8 Australian size now and going down) since the pandemic hit because I am doing alot excercise and eating less. I do my teeth whittening, and now I have white teeth. I do face laser and botox since the pandemic hit in 2020. And many more good thing about what I have improved since 2020 when the pandemic hit. I know u upset about what the SA said about your body type, and you are sensitive about it. But trust me. It is not as bad as the taxi driver said I was fat many years ago.
People can be totally insensitive and also just plain mean. Rise above it and choose to not dwell on it. It’s a happier place to be when we can learn to accept ourselves for who we are. Other peoples opinions then mean what we want them to mean. X
I honestly honestly have never thought you look even slightly overweight and a size 14 these days is probably below the average weight! You looked amazing trying those bags ! (And btw I still prefer the Jodie) i think you still think and look at yourself bigger than you are ! I think the sa just mean your bigger than petite meaning petite is a size 6 and about 5 ft ! I can’t wait for the vlogs and unboxings ❤❤
I’ve been in that Loewe store and my experience was good one, so I’m really disappointed to hear that their SA used thoughtless and hurtful language. I hope you can put it from your mind and instead, focus on the fact that you are becoming healthier, and stronger through your consistent training. That’s a better gift to yourself than any bag. That said, I would really like to know what’s in that Dior carrier bag!! I’m calling the Toujours (in which case I can’t wait to hear your review) or a Caro.
I am so very sorry that happened to you. It’s making me cry because it’s happened to me and I am much bigger than you much bigger and you are not overweight you have a darling shape ,so I don’t know how you could’ve been fat shamed. Shame on the people. It has happened to me many times and it’s hurtful but you are beautiful and definitely no one should fat shame you. I don’t think you’re overweight you have a darling shape .I just found your TH-cam channel and I’m excited❤️ They both looked on you. Wow, I am sorry that was out of hand , i differently would have walked out. It actually happened to me in a store. I went in the store to shop for my daughter and the girl came up extremely snotty and said we don’t carry anything that you could wear while I was going to buy stuff for my daughter and I walked out crying and I never complain never ride a company but I called that company to this day talking about it hurts. Shame on him.
Aw that’s awful. Don’t dwell on these things. It def says more about the person who said it than you. If we feel insecure we then are hypersensitive to comments. Words can only hurt you if you let them. Let it wash over you and be you!
:( I get the sense he was trying to help but obviously didn't go about it the right way. Sorry to hear that happened. Hope the trip otherwise was fabulous.
I agree. I think she should go back and tell him that is how she felt when he said that. Telling us in a video is great but telling him how she feels will have more of an impact.
@wildunfiltered, I suggested that so he won’t continue with that type of comment to someone else because I feel like he didn’t think he said anything wrong. He is a guy. Not that that’s an excuse.
Right. Maybe English is not his first language and by 'Big' he meant 'Tall' 🤷♀️🤦♀️. Everyone says to get a smaller bag if you are petite...in my mind that means vertically challenged such as myself lol! For jeans, Regular, Petite and Tall deal with rise of your jeans proportional to length of torso/waist. Maybe he just thought you were tall and as such needed a bigger bag. Totally playing Devil's Advocate. Regardless, I'm so sorry this happened to you and I for one think you look amazing. From my vantage point, you do not look big nor have I ever had that perception. Much love and hugs from across the pond. ❤
Late to the party, new sub ❤ I’m an unusually tall woman. I also have exceptionally large hands and feet, and have been a solid uk16 since puberty. I have learned to love my strong and very useful body ❤❤❤ I always have to consider purse size on my frame, but words matter! “You’re not petite” can very easily and helpfully be expressed as “you have a beautifully feminine figure that is complimented by the GM size perfectly”. Bless him! He sounds like a lovely person, perhaps just some polishing is required 🙂
First of all some people will call themselves petite and they’re quite overweight so I know that some people consider petite being just short. Maybe when he said you’re quite big, he meant tall…. Another Positive way to look at it is if somebody said that to me and I definitely knew they were talking about my weight even though it’s hurtful, I think I would actually be grateful because sometimes it’s those comments from strangers that aren’t trying to be mean they can change your life and you might start working out or eating better, etc. and if you are already doing those things like you say you are maybe it’s a way to look at what you’re doing and really think deeply. Are you doing enough? Are you eating things you shouldn’t be and telling yourself well I worked out really hard today or I didn’t eat this other bad food so I deserve this because of that so it could turn into a positive. I personally know I have done that to myself where I thought while I’m doing all this working out I’m eating really well and I am not losing the weight. I want to lose and really what it turned out to be was. I wasn’t pushing myself the way I should’ve been and I really wasn’t eating, as healthy as I should’ve been when I started doing that that’s when I saw the difference, again, I’m only trying to turn it into a positive. I’m not saying what he said was right I’m just trying to turn a negative into a positive.
No that’s ok. I welcome your comments. I know some people say petite or tall but he also followed it with big. Also I am not tall I am 5 ft 4 so I don’t think he meant that. Yes I know what you mean about using it as inspiration to do more. I have been training 4 times a week for 18 months now and also looking at nutrition so I am already on a good path. It will just take me a while to get to my goals. So I think that is why I am able to reflect and reframe and not be upset about the comment as I know I am doing a lot of things to make changes etc. It’s all good. As I said in my video that years ago I would have reacted very differently to now. So it’s all good. X
@@Wildunfiltered i’m glad you’re taking the positive and not letting it get to you. You look great as you said you’re trying really hard and he will continue to feel and look better and better and like you said I’m sure he didn’t say it to try to upset or hurt you, and, of course, I can totally understand how you feel
Dear Deb, I am so sorry that a shadow fell on your beautiful trip, which was supposed to be fun. I was in that situation before and I felt the client advisor indicated I should hide my body behind a big bag. But that is No. 1 an oldfashioned opinion and No. 2 pointless, because you cannot hide your body anyway and No. 3 above all you shouldn`t want to hide yourself at all. Thank God you don`t, Deb, otherwise you would never expose yourself on youtube and we were not able to watch all these beautiful videos. So happy you do! Other than that I like the bigger bag on you, it looks really different, cool and modern as a shoulder bag. I could not wear such a big bag, I would make me look even shorter than I am. But you are tall (not big), you can wear this. The smaller one ist less outstanding. And I don´t think I like this bag style as a crossbody at all, although it is obviously meant to be worn differnt ways. I am looking foreward to your next videos 😘😘😘
Thank you so much. It was shocking but on reflection it’s something I am not going to dwell on. I don’t want it to put me off the bag as it was really lovely x
I don't think the SA was fat- shaming you. You're not fat, first of all. Our body shape and proportions do matter though, in how bag sizes look on us. You asked, he was trying to be helpful. I was at the doctors recently, and he kept telling me how unbelievable thin I am. I know, lost too much weight, but a doctor just randomly tells me that like 5 times during the appointment, didn't even have anything to do with the reason I was there lol. I found it uncomfortable, but didn't think he was trying to insult me, just maybe more like thinking out loud. My point is, no need to try and search for insults, where there is none :) You look fabulous 🥳
Thank you. Yes I do think he was trying to help but was clumsy with his words. People seem to think it’s ok to mention our body size/shape. I know it’s how I feel about myself and so it hit a nerve. X
Personally, I'm not particularly sensitive about people talking about my weight or my issues in general. I mean, I've seen myself in a mirror, I'm definitely overweight and possibly obese. As long as you accept how you are, those statements just become observations and not as emotional as people make it out to be. Like if you think I'm thin, you need an eye appointment 😂. I openly discuss my weight, finances, performance issues at work, etc. with people around me. It feels very liberating, and people can give you honest advice they wouldn't normally give.
Deb, first of all, you are not a large person and you are very fit. Please do not let this person get into your head. Second, I completely disagree with his opinion-the smaller bag looks way better! I’m so sorry that the SA was so insensitive with his words. I’m glad you did not purchase anything from him.
My mouth dropped at the comment from the Loewe SA!!! First, it’s not applicable to you, secondly it shouldn’t be said to ANYONE, and third, the larger size was in fact, too big for you! It swallowed you up!!! So glad you didn’t buy from that SA!…It really is a beautiful bag on you…especially the smaller size, both on your shoulder and crossbody!!! I did laugh at you breaking all of your rules, but as a once in a lifetime opportunity… so great you didn’t adhere to those rules!!!! Can’t wait to see all the treasures!!!! ❤
Thank you so much. I liked the smaller size too as it was more versatile as it could be cross body or shoulder bag. Re breaking my own rules - I couldn’t resist honestly! X
I am sorry you had to go through that, you are not fat. It's ridiculous that someone felt that was the proper comment to make. A simple, I like the larger bag would have been fine.
I am petite and hear all the time that I am to small for a big bag and that everyone will only see the bag and not me. And if I try on a smaller bag then they would tell me tings like "Yes, you can pull that of sense you are so small". So, I guess we have to follow their "rules" 😂 otherwise we will hear it. I do not think he meant it to come out like that ❤
These SAs are just out of touch these days. As a black woman, I don't purchase from where I'm made to feel uncomfortable (Louis, Tom Ford, Chanel). Good for you on walking out. I'm not a fan of Loewe, never have been. To each their own taste, but I just don't see the lure; and certainly not if they're going to shame their potential customers. At the end of the day, it's all leather. These brands need to recognize the power of good customer service, which starts with training and zero tolerance for bad behavior.
Wow... I hope you walked right out. You didn't ask about your body type, YOU ASKED ABOUT THE BAG! WOW. I would have gone with the crossbody option one btw and I'm not a petite woman and I'm quite bigger than you!
The smaller crossbody looked good on you, the larger bag was, sorry...but it was ugly, that big lumpy handle? Nope! Thank you for teaching me how to say Loewe !
I think you misunderstood him, honestly I think he was saying you are tall, not talking about your weight. I understand your point but if someone told me I wasn't petit, I wouldn't think they were talking about my weight but my height, cause definitely I'm not 5' and unless it's an optical illusion neither are you 😅 I loved to see the green crossbody on you 😍 but then I also love burgundy so it's a hard choice 😁 can't wait to see more about your girls meeting since I'm following the majority 😅😂😂😂
@@Wildunfiltered I'm the same height as you and we aren't petit, I'm sure that you as me see daily women that aren't as tall as us. I'm still convinced he wasn't talking about your clothing size and speaking of clothing... That coat from the footage looks gorgeous on you 🥰
First of all, this SA needs some sales assistance and I think he was trying to help, I don't think he was fat shaming you but actually trying to help you. For example, he could have said, "well if you are seeking a bigger bag, you definitely can pull that off but if you are looking for a smaller crossbody, then the small one". Please don't waste your thoughts on this because of all the reasons you have stated. I personally liked the smaller one on you and I purposely did not listen to your words the first time around as I wanted to form my opinion. So you see. I'm truly hoping he sees this and gains some knowledge; please don't hold Loewe and your love of the product accountable! If you love it, go for it and cudos to you for enlightening all viewers!
Thank you so much. Yes I chose to not dwell on it as it only makes you bitter which I don’t want to be. I chose to move forward and keep on with my goals. It won’t derail me. I loved the bag and I won’t let one silly comment stop me from buying from the brand x
Other people's, esp a stranger's unwanted opinion tho may hurt, us can be always misconstrued. Sometimes, we see ourselves differently in the mirror. It took me a while to accept even tho im 5'1 , as I aged, i did got thicker and some bags do look too small. Eventually, it's up to you if you wanted a small or big bag. We can only control what we think and feel. We also see others differently as they see themselves. Like we see them thick, but they find themselves slim. Our best weapon is to accept the truth .Try it, say you are thick, most likely people will say you are not😂. The trend now is, thin and slim is waif-like and that makes 98% of us on the thicker side.
It’s a strange one as I didn’t ask him which one suited my body frame. I was just saying I couldn’t decide which one I preferred. He had no need to bring my shape into it.
When you ask for an opinion then be prepared for them to give their opinion. At the end of the day it's their opinion. And...and you probably are larger than some and smaller than others, so what this person said is not wrong! The person was not trying to insult you. If he used the words that you mentioned in the video, then he was right. move on and if you were hurt then the reason is not him being rude but that you are insecure. If you are doing enough for health then that's good, be confident. It's a you problem not his problem. If your husband or your mother or your doctor said it, would it be insulting? The truth is the truth, take it or leave it but blaming others is not the way to go about it. Especially when said by someone who has something to lose by being straight with you. Your friends who are outraged are just being sympathetic.
Thank you for your comment. I agree that if I asked the question be prepared for their opinion. However I didn’t ask which looked best on me or which suited my body shape the most. In reality I said to him I didn’t know which I liked more. So he answered a question I didn’t ask. However I am insecure about my body shape and therefore it hit a nerve because I already feel sensitive about the subject. In this you are right that I got offended due to how I feel about myself. However I do say in the video that I chose to calm down and reflect and reframe and this is the work I am doing internally to lead a more tolerant life. X
With all due respect I don’t think what the sales associate said is fat shaming most of the public is not petite and I think those words were taken to hard
I agree! It’s the tone in which he said it. He didn’t say it meanly. He seemed like he was trying to help you make a decision. Weight is subjective and a sensitive subject.
@@Wildunfiltered that is out of touch with reality if you go into a fashion boutique to be fitted your frame is referred to for purposes of helping you the term petite is for height 5feet 4 inches or less this relevant for bag strap length not all bags will fit all people and not everyone is petite I think the hyper sensitivity to size is even more pronounced when it cannot even be mentioned very unhealthy
Oof I'm so sorry he said that to you - absolutely unacceptable. There's no reason to comment on a persons body ever. I love Loewe as a brand so hopefully this experience won't put you off the brand.
Hi. I don’t think he fat shamed you. Im size 14-16 now but last year i was 18-20 and was looking at a Fendi mini baguette and was told, its better regular size because it looks like your body eats the bag. I could have felt ofended but in reality it’s true. Such small bags in big-wide hips like mine looks awkward. I guess the words could be different but the end point was the truth. I get you but don’t sweat it. They are not your friends. Most of them are in sales because they didn’t get too far in the education or enough training.
Hi. I agree that certain size bags may look different on different people. However his words were clumsy. I choose to move on and not take it to heart x
I don't understand how the SA said you are "quite big". You're not big at all. I remember one time I was shopping with my mom and my mom was looking at this shirt that was up high on a hanger, a SA came up to my mom and said " we don't have that in your big size". We left the store immediately. I was so angry I wanted to slap the SA. My mom isn't big either. I don't understand how people can say these things. I've worked in retail years ago and I would have never said that to a client. You wanna encourage clients, not make them feel shitty.
This is a golden rule that you never even comment on the customer’s body. In Italy they really know how to do it and only there. French are extremely judgmental - I experienced that in Luxembourg a lot at French brands, including Hermes 😂 they just look at you like you were size 56 and I’m French size 38🙈 so yes, people don’t get it, and young women are even more cruel to older women, it’s a fact.
The smaller puzzle looked better on you! But that’s not the point what the actual F that’s totally unacceptable, also what lazy styling advice he gave you - I’ve learned that I like micro or mini bags as well as big totes it doesn’t matter what shape you are.
I really felt for you deb I know how hard you have worked but he's a bloke and probably doesn't realise what he's said sound like he's done his own legs by even suggesting a bag wouldn't suit your size lol .... your lovely be you I think you look great
Was he a foreigner? Because in Spanish for example to be big is not the same as being fat. It's more like being tall. To be called petite is more the insult because you're being called short. Maybe as Loewe is a Spanish brand the guy was a Spaniard and got lost in translation?
What he said may have been well-intentioned but it was very lacking in tact. Plus he isn't right anyway! It depends on the design! On the purpose! That bag is not boxy or bulky so it's actually veery comfortable and it's streamlined and that shape of the hobo it's PERFECT in either size on you! It's a fabulous bag. What a shame! I've worked in retail and styling and he's not so well-informed and a bit thoughtless. Plus you can break style and design rules. Of course you can, it's about intention. It's good that it didn't have a jarring effect to your core. That's healthy.
I am so sorry that u were 'fat shamed' that's just awful especially when u are shopping, I have been body shamed many times in a few luxury stores , u are a completely normal size, even if u were not how DARE he!! U are NOT 'quite big'!!! They don't know what u are going thru but it shouldn't even be applicable! I don't think it's positive atall as u are not big!!! I'm a new subscriber and I think ur fabulous ❤
Thank you so much! At any size or shape we don’t need other people commenting. I chose to not let it affect me but I also wanted to open a conversation about it. Thank you so much for your kind words x
OMG! I am trying to think of a host of excuses! I’m hoping the SA had no life experience or maybe was speaking in their second language or maybe meant height not dress size, as it’s just appalling to refer to someone’s appearance. Full stop. I don’t even tell friends when they look nice because I don’t think that a female’s appearance is relevant. Ever. Thank you so much for sharing. It is only through discussion that we can change things. Love you lots xxx
Thanks love. Yes it’s how we deal with these things that’s important. I’m happy with how hard I’m working and I am feeling more confident every day. So I choose not to dwell on this. I am 5ft 4 so I’m definitely not tall. He meant what he meant but I choose to not worry about it. The more we talk about things the more we can move forward. X 😘
People's words can only have the power that we give them. I love that you took the time to reframe the conversation.
Very true words. Yes I’m much less insecure now. I can reflect and reframe. Not everyone can though. X
Helloooo I am a Hongkonger and live in UK. I love your videos. Don't let idiots ruin your days. No matter thin, fit or fat, this is none of 3rd party's business. I am a bag-lover too. As long as our financial situation allows us to buy something and make us happy. Why not?! Support you always!! 😘😍🤩
Hi. Welcome to the Wildunfiltered Family. Thank you x
I’m sorry that happened to you. That can be so hurtful. I really love the lens with which you decided to view the situation. I think you must be a very kind and compassionate person. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much. I try to look at things with empathy as not many people out there set out to be nasty so it’s mainly how we deal with these things that’s important. With age comes tolerance. X
Really appreciate your authentic courageous and compassionate response to this. The real story is how confident and healthy you’ve become in what is a relatively short amount of time! You’re an inspiration!
That’s so kind of you. That honestly means a lot x
What a mature way to address this, it truly speaks of your character to put yourself into his shoes and assume the best intentions from his side. How great you’re sharing this experience with all of us, it is really inspiring to see you share your vulnerability 🌹 Besides: you look stunning appearance-wise first of all, no question about that, and what’s even better is your inner beauty and passion that shine through and radiates from you so clearly, amplifying the beauty you already have. When you said you were much less confident a year ago (measured from the making of this video) I couldn’t believe it. You have everything to be confident about. Thanks for this channel, it’s lovely to watch your videos and speak about your passion ❤
Aw you are so kind. I am very shy and nervous in a lot of ways. I am finding more confidence doing TH-cam so I’m very grateful x
Deb I really love how you told this story - I admire your reflections and your resilience given your journey! You’re an amazing woman 🥰
Dayle thank you so much. That means a lot. As I get older I have learned to reflect and reframe and that way it helps me deal with things in a less bitter and negative way. Its all good. Love ya babes 😘
Awwww!! Deb!!! I’m SO glad you’re not taking it badly, especially when I think back to where you were mentally a year ago, you’re right, it would have totally knocked you down. You’ve come such a long way and you’ve done and look AMAZING!!! ❤ xx
Thanks love! I remember so many chats with you back then. I was definitely not in a good place. I’ve dragged myself out of that place and feel so much more confidence. Thanks for supporting me it doesn’t go unnoticed my love x
I had to pull over and stop the car to comment. First time watching your channel. First, there is nothing big about you and secondly I think the smaller bag looks better on you. American here and love your accent. So elegant. Could listen to you all day. ❤
Aw welcome to the fam! I’m glad you’ve found my channel. That is so sweet thank you. X
You're handling it well, babe. But I'm still ready to jump a train and give him a dressing down on your behalf! 💖 You're GORGEOUS! 😘
Bless you darling Gwenny!
The bags are gorgeous, esp the olive green. I wonder if he was (like you mentioned) trying to just be helpful. I don’t feel that saying a person is “not petit” is an insult in anyway, but when he went on to say “you’re bigger” that part is not acceptable. I don’t believe he meant it bad, he may have just wanted you to have the most flattering bag for your build, in his opinion.I had an SA tell me not to choose the mini size, because as as a 6’0 tall man it wouldn’t “look right”, I bought the mini anyways because I liked it.
Exactly. We can like what we like. For me it depends on what I want the bag for as to the size I go for. Different functions etc.
Can’t wait for the unboxings! As for the SA who did not choose his words wisely I am happy you aren’t taking it to heart. People now a days really don’t think before they speak in my opinion. You keep on shining and beaming and enjoy all your new bags! Congrats! 🎉👜💖🫶😊
Thank you so much. I am much better equipped now to deal with this sort of thing. But not everyone is. Unboxings to come. X
Shame on him...u are PRECIOUS, our bodies are NOT who we are. Thank u for the courage to speak out about this. I DO NOT like people being judged.
Exactly - there’s more to me than my body shape. X
You are stunning. You carry yourself with such grace. Both bags looked beautiful on you.
That’s so kind x
Hi Deb, I absolutely love you and your videos. You are so wonderful and are beautiful. As a person who has been in recovery from an eating disorder I completely understand why you reacted the way you did. I completely agree with what your PT said. It’s not a bad thing to have a bigger body frame at all. It’s the way society has trained us to think that skinny is better. I’m bigger than I have ever been at the moment and that’s because I’m giving my body the energy it needs. Our brain and body needs fuel and the important thing is that we are looking after our body, not how big it is ❤
Thank you so much for your kind words. This is why people should be mindful of their words as no one knows what that person might be going through. Keep doing you my love!
I think both Loewe bags look great on you. I can see why it is hard to make a decision! Thank you for your channel. I really enjoy your content and your personality!
That’s so sweet. Thank you so much x really appreciate that x
So sorry this happened to you. I’m a size 14/16 and I would choose the smaller crossbody bag for me. The larger hobo looks like too much bag to lug around. I hate it when sales associates tell me that a certain outfit or bag makes me look slimmer. I need to stop asking sales associates for advice too. You look wonderful! Your taste is exquisite.❤️
Thank you so much. That’s very kind x
The only section for petite is clothing-----not purses. I get it, about the big bag and looking in proportion, but the salesperson needed to say, what bag size suits your lifestyle better for what you carry on the daily, but go smaller if it's for a special occasion because you don't need to kitchem sink to go to a party.
Exactly!!!
Which color of the squeeze bag did you prefer the burgundy or olive? I love those two colors the most
They were both really lovely. I think burgundy was my favourite though x
Many years ago, I needed a dress for a special occasion, and I went to a store in Brooklyn, NY. The sales person who helped me asked what size I was, and I told her a 16. She brought me a few dresses that were really ugly. I said no, thank you, but I want something flattering, something that looks nice on me. She said “You’re not supposed to look nice when you are a 16”.😮😮😮 So rude!!! I left the store very embarrassed. I was with my teenage daughters. It was mortifying!!!
That’s awful! Truly awful. Shocking
What an appalling comment! And in front of teens. Glad you walked out. Everyone deserves beauty and true beauty is from within. Love to you
The way you described the incident it does sound like he was trying to help and didn't mean to be offensive. As I'm watching I'm trying to think of how I might have worded things differently if I were him. Maybe something about the larger bag being more proportional to your frame? That could bring up the same negative connotations, though. I don't know. It's a tricky one. Good that you talked to people about it and reframed how you're processing it. Can't wait to see the vlogs and unboxings!
Aw Hi Autumn - thank you so much for watching. Yes it was tricky as I felt he was trying to help. He could have simply said he preferred the larger one. In any case it hit a nerve because of how I feel about myself. I’m learning to let things go and realise that I can choose how I deal with things. It’s actually very freeing! X
Really sorry you had to have this experience and thank you for sharing it - so important to call out these types of inappropriate behaviour. Looking forward to the unboxings ❤❤❤
Thanks Hanne. I choose not to dwell on it. Refuse to let it ruin our amazing weekend x
@@Wildunfiltered Quite right - nothing can or will ruin that amazing weekend 💕💕💕
Wow!! Cannot believe that. Well for what it’s worth I think the small looked the best on you! The medium looked too large!
Thank you so much. I liked the small too. More versatile as could be cross body or shoulder x
I really like the smaller loewe on you! Love that green too. And a bit more versatile.
It was stunning x
This story really hits in the gut. I’m so sorry you had to hear that😢 I think you are beautiful and i love what i know about you from your videos❤❤❤
That’s so sweet thank you. I choose to not dwell on it and let go of the bitterness x
I'm very sorry this happened to you. The smaller one looks really good on you!!!
Thank you. I loved it x
So sorry to hear about the way you were treated. No one deserves that.
BTW, I found you through Amelia and Meredith. I love to support small channels with excellent content!
Thank you and welcome to the Family! X
I love the squeeze bag too on my list! Which size did you like more? I love the medium
I honestly liked both x
I always ask another shopper because then have no stake in the game. That's vile of them. I as a 6'2 375 lb man don't think I've ever had an employee of a store say something like that to me. That seems like the sort of thing that only happens to women and I am so so sorry. I know I have asked employees about the fit of clothing and received honest remarks about that but never has my weight or size been referenced in regards to a bag.
I know it’s my issue and that’s why it hit a nerve. But that is why so many of us are hypersensitive to these things. X
Wow I would of kicked off! Well done for keeping Your cool and just leaving❤ so sorry that happened to You! He really did not think before he spoke did He…. Xxx
He really didn’t think. I was too shocked to say anything.
Sorry to hear that, I had a SA in Chanel in Florida tell me when I was deciding between a mini and a med CF…”well for your size you should go for the jumbo!”. I said well I am not not looking for a jumbo and left the store w/o buying anything.
Honestly shocking!
I’m sorry. I was once introduced in the gym to a trainer who told me that he was sure he could design an exercise and diet plan for me to help me get off the excess weight and get fit. One, I had not asked for that advice. Two, I doing a tour because I wanted to improve my marathon pace (as the last marathon I had run I hadn’t met my goal of cracking 4 hours). And, three I’d lost 4 stone just a few years prior and I didn’t need help with my diet. Some people make assumptions and are moron. Not bad just morons,
Yes you’re right. People make assumptions based on what society tells us we ‘should’ be or they make assumptions based on how they feel. How about finding out the persons motivation for being there first before assuming. There are many many reasons why I go training x
Oh my, I am so sorry you were treated in such a thoughtless and rude way. Your outlook is amazing, and you are more understanding than most would be, myself included. I found you via Gwenny, Dayle, Amelia, Meredith, etc, and subscribed right away!! ❤ Looking forward to your vlogs and unboxings!
Welcome to the fam! So glad you’ve found me. Thank you so much for your kind words. I’ve learned as I get older it’s better for me to let things go. Let go of the bitterness as I would dwell on it and the other person would have not given it any energy. Thank you for your comments and hope you enjoy the videos. Lots to come! X
I‘m very sorry to hear what happened. This guy needs a proper training in Customer Experience!!!
Both bags looked really gorgeous on you. Personally I preferred the smaller one in green for every day.
Last weekend, I was also in a Loewe store in my country.
It wasn’t the first time that I compared bags and belts, the SA‘s always described their products how to use it etc. (traveling, everyday etc.)
This shouldn’t happen nowadays - unbelievable 😢.
Totally agree - x
I'm sorry to hear about the shaming incident, Deb. Yes the SA did not choose the right words or ask further questions to see what you plan to use the bag for but I'm glad to hear you are not bothered by it now and just letting you know that you look great. The changes are showing. The roses are beautiful. I've bought from Rose Forever before for myself and as gifts and they are stunning. Such a wonderful thing that the TH-camrs met up! I have to catch the other videos. I'm subscribed to almost all of the TH-camrs mentioned and love your and their chanels. Can't wait to see what you picked up. Sometimes you can't miss out on an opportunity when it comes up and looking forward to your amazing finds. Xx
Thanks love. That’s very sweet of you. Sooo much to look forward to in future videos. We had an absolute blast x
Good for you for not letting this experience ruin your day. It’s true he was just making a statement based on his observation but he was clearly a bit clueless as to what is and isn’t appropriate to say or how to phrase it. He may very well have been trying to help but it still was not an appropriate thing to say because many people are very sensitive about their body size. But I liked the way your trainer looked at it and I agree with her. People come in all shapes and sizes and that’s ok. By the way both bags looked good on you. The small one looked great and if anything, the large one looked pretty large on your frame. Glad you had a wonderful time and I can’t wait to see what you bought!
Thank you for your kind words. Agree with all of this. X
Both Loewe bags look good on you.
Thank you - they were beautiful x
You're the best Deb. I love your outlook and I am appalled by the SA's comments. Thoughtless and inconsiderate come to mind and how perfect that you simply walked out. Yep, no thank you! We have an endless selection of beautiful bags and to think that anyone selling those bags would be so ill-mannered is beyond me. Buh bye to the SA and perhaps Loewe needs to rethink their hiring decision.
I think he was clumsy with his words. I choose to not dwell on it. X
Love how you handled this. ❤ and no, we don’t ask permission 😊😊😊
Thank you! I figured no need to be sad and dwell on it. He will have not thought any more about it I’m sure. Flippant comments can only harm if we let them.
You should have said "all of this fabulousness will not fit into a petite body". I think he just misspoke, I don't think he meant any harm. I think we all say things where we wish we could rephrase them. Glad you had fun.
Love this!
Yes, I put the spin on it that your size at 14-16 is not a negative thing, it just a statement of fact in comparison to a 0-2 that also exist.
Just like a certain hairstyle might go better with straight hair vs curly hair (some people could feel sensitive to that) and certain contouring looks better on certain face shapes.
I know size is a sensitive thing (me being a a very very large woman) but maybe we all need to stop buying into the word fat as anything other than a description.
Yes it’s true. Factually I am bigger than some people. I choose not to see this as a bad thing but as I have been insecure in the past it does hit a nerve. I think he was clumsy with his words. X
Sending hugs your way. As a fellow 14/16 (UK size), I've also had some thin SAs look sideways or not be that helpful, or downright rude. I've also had lovely SAs who were loads of fun! I don't put up with rude sales staff. It's them, not you. If they say something rude, you can say "that was rude," and make stern eye contact. Ask for another SA with a better disposition if you still want to shop in the store. If not, just walk out (like you did, and I applaud that!). No item is worth rude sales staff ... ever. Go somewhere else (Selfridges, Harrods, etc) and you may have a much better experience! Can't wait to see the unveiling! (-: You have worked hard and deserve respect ... (-:
Thank you so much x
I am so sorry to hear that this SA said this to you and phrased their words in this way.
In all honesty looking at the video, I prefer the smaller bag given versatility and it is still a throw over the shoulder easy bag.
I loved it x
What a stupid, insensitive thing to say. He is clearly also not good at his job because his words made him miss out on a sale.. I’m sure this is not the first time he has either offended or gotten in trouble in his life with his choice of words. You look amazing and I’m so glad your confidence has grown! Looking forward to the unboxings!
Thank you so much. Yes there was no way I was buying! I didn’t let it ruin my day or weekend so it’s all good x
PS. the smaller bag looked better
I did love it. I preferred the burgundy colour so I wished the smaller size came in burgundy x
Great video. Thanks for the story. ❤
Glad you enjoyed it!
Hi! Would you be open to calling the gentleman and kindly share with him how his words made you feel? It could give him an opportunity to change his words going fwd.
I don’t think I would feel comfortable doing that x
i'm late to this video. It's great that you are being reflective and considering the genuinely helpful spirit in which this poorly worded comment was offered. I would think anyone especially in fashion would know better.
Exactly x
That is terrible! Glad you walked out.
I was definitely shocked x
Good for you to leaving. How horrible to say that. You look amazing and can’t understand why someone would say that. I prefer the smaller one on you. But its personal preference. You are so beautiful don’t ever let anyone break you down.
That’s very sweet of you!
If anyone ever referred to me as ‘big’ I’d say ‘Thank you’ and flex a bicep. 💪🏻❤️ It’s interesting how we, as women, oftentimes think of ‘big’ as being bad. Big can mean tall and/or strong which I’m cool with.😁
But, I agree, it was a clumsy use of words from the Sales Associate because it can be interpreted in different ways and could be triggering.
For what it’s worth, I think you look fabulous. 💖
Thank you so much x
Good grief. Sorry that happened! You handled it well & I can believe it may have been just his thoughtless attempt at phrasing, as you’re positing.
Both bags looked great on you! I always prefer larger bags except when I want to crossbody it often. Sooo I’m no help here. 😅
Great rules for shopping! Sticking to them would be hard for most of us. 🤦♀️
Thank you so much. Yes tnink he was just clumsy with his words. Learning to let things wash over me. It’s a happier place to be. Loved both sizes of the bag. It is beautiful x
I am sorry this happened to you. He was inconsiderate, he could have just said you are tall and both bags look good on you. Which they do, both were very nice! And you look gorgeous by the way! Nobody can make such remarks. Your roses are bautiful. i cant wait for your unboxing:-)
Thank you so much. That’s very kind x unboxings to come x
The smaller bag looked very nice on you actually, the large one might become too heavy to carry long distances!
Very true! X
I think your other friend was right! All he said was 'big' but we have all associate 'big' with negativity.
Yes! Who decides that big is bad and small is good? Let’s turn it on its head - all bodies are beautiful. If I choose to lose weight it’s for my health and energy not to fit into society’s vision of what I should be!
You are correct that it is so important to be careful with one's words. Overall, I think commenting on anyone's appearance ever is not a great idea. Our appearance is the least interesting thing about us. At the same time, I also think we do need to challenge conventional body ideals and turning this on its head is the best approach. Why is being petite good and being big is bad? Why is being young good and old bad? These ideas are patriarchal and antiquated. I'm going to own my grey hair, you own your shape, and we will all be happier if we are coming at life from a place of self acceptance 🙂
Love this!!!! Yes my personal trainer said a similar thing. Who decides that big is bad and small is more acceptable. It’s antiquated ideals that need to disappear. X
Certain clients are targeted for pushing the more expensive items and the ones that aren’t selling. Managers signal to sales associates which clients to target for these items. Be careful ❤
Thanks for sharing!
Gurrrl! That SA was out of line but this would be a teaching moment for you to educate that SA on his choice of words. In fact I might even try to track him down to have a quick chat with him. People do not think before they speak especially about anyones body shape.
Yes I was too shocked to say anything but I think he knew by my expression that he had said the wrong thing x
I'm sorry that happened to you. I don't think it was to shame you, but I totally agree it could have been done much more elegantly. You would think people in luxury retail would know that. Hope you're feeling good about your body and all the amazing things it is doing for you!!!
I think it happens a lot but also there are some amazing sales associates out there who do get it. I choose to let it go x
My opinion about how much level someone sensitive about word is all depend on different individual people. If the SA told me I am not petite and this bag suits my bigger body frame. I ok with it. Many years ago, a taxi driver told me I was fat and should loose some weight. When i argued with my ex, he said I am fat c..t. Those comments make me angry and upset. Can call me weird. Everyone hate the pandemic and lock down, but I love it. It totally changed my life. Some examples life changing are, I loose alot weight (size 8 Australian size now and going down) since the pandemic hit because I am doing alot excercise and eating less. I do my teeth whittening, and now I have white teeth. I do face laser and botox since the pandemic hit in 2020. And many more good thing about what I have improved since 2020 when the pandemic hit. I know u upset about what the SA said about your body type, and you are sensitive about it. But trust me. It is not as bad as the taxi driver said I was fat many years ago.
People can be totally insensitive and also just plain mean. Rise above it and choose to not dwell on it. It’s a happier place to be when we can learn to accept ourselves for who we are. Other peoples opinions then mean what we want them to mean. X
I honestly honestly have never thought you look even slightly overweight and a size 14 these days is probably below the average weight! You looked amazing trying those bags ! (And btw I still prefer the Jodie) i think you still think and look at yourself bigger than you are ! I think the sa just mean your bigger than petite meaning petite is a size 6 and about 5 ft ! I can’t wait for the vlogs and unboxings ❤❤
Thanks Jen. It’s ok I didn’t dwell on it. I just thought it was important to speak out when these things happen. Unboxings to come! Any guesses?
@@Wildunfiltered all I’m guessing/hoping there’s something navy 🤔❤️
Oh Deb so sorry this happened to you, I know how hurtful that must’ve been in the moment good intentions or not.
It was hurtful but on reflection I can reframe it and take it for what it is. Nothing that I need to dwell on x
I’ve been in that Loewe store and my experience was good one, so I’m really disappointed to hear that their SA used thoughtless and hurtful language. I hope you can put it from your mind and instead, focus on the fact that you are becoming healthier, and stronger through your consistent training. That’s a better gift to yourself than any bag. That said, I would really like to know what’s in that Dior carrier bag!! I’m calling the Toujours (in which case I can’t wait to hear your review) or a Caro.
Yes it is a lovely store. What a shame. I am choosing not to dwell on it so it’s all good. Unboxings to come!!!!
I am so very sorry that happened to you. It’s making me cry because it’s happened to me and I am much bigger than you much bigger and you are not overweight you have a darling shape ,so I don’t know how you could’ve been fat shamed. Shame on the people. It has happened to me many times and it’s hurtful but you are beautiful and definitely no one should fat shame you. I don’t think you’re overweight you have a darling shape .I just found your TH-cam channel and I’m excited❤️
They both looked on you. Wow, I am sorry that was out of hand , i differently would have walked out. It actually happened to me in a store. I went in the store to shop for my daughter and the girl came up extremely snotty and said we don’t carry anything that you could wear while I was going to buy stuff for my daughter and I walked out crying and I never complain never ride a company but I called that company to this day talking about it hurts. Shame on him.
Aw that’s awful. Don’t dwell on these things. It def says more about the person who said it than you. If we feel insecure we then are hypersensitive to comments. Words can only hurt you if you let them. Let it wash over you and be you!
@@Wildunfiltered so very true listening to you and your comments have really helped me. Thank you.
@@marieleemcgill5011 you’re welcome. Hang in there love x
:( I get the sense he was trying to help but obviously didn't go about it the right way. Sorry to hear that happened. Hope the trip otherwise was fabulous.
I agree. I think she should go back and tell him that is how she felt when he said that. Telling us in a video is great but telling him how she feels will have more of an impact.
Yes I think he was trying to help. X
I was too shocked to say anything at the time. I think he knew by my face that I wasn’t impressed.
@wildunfiltered, I suggested that so he won’t continue with that type of comment to someone else because I feel like he didn’t think he said anything wrong. He is a guy. Not that that’s an excuse.
Right. Maybe English is not his first language and by 'Big' he meant 'Tall' 🤷♀️🤦♀️. Everyone says to get a smaller bag if you are petite...in my mind that means vertically challenged such as myself lol! For jeans, Regular, Petite and Tall deal with rise of your jeans proportional to length of torso/waist. Maybe he just thought you were tall and as such needed a bigger bag. Totally playing Devil's Advocate. Regardless, I'm so sorry this happened to you and I for one think you look amazing. From my vantage point, you do not look big nor have I ever had that perception. Much love and hugs from across the pond. ❤
Late to the party, new sub ❤
I’m an unusually tall woman. I also have exceptionally large hands and feet, and have been a solid uk16 since puberty. I have learned to love my strong and very useful body ❤❤❤
I always have to consider purse size on my frame, but words matter!
“You’re not petite” can very easily and helpfully be expressed as “you have a beautifully feminine figure that is complimented by the GM size perfectly”.
Bless him! He sounds like a lovely person, perhaps just some polishing is required 🙂
Yes he was very sweet but got it sooo wrong!
First of all some people will call themselves petite and they’re quite overweight so I know that some people consider petite being just short. Maybe when he said you’re quite big, he meant tall…. Another Positive way to look at it is if somebody said that to me and I definitely knew they were talking about my weight even though it’s hurtful, I think I would actually be grateful because sometimes it’s those comments from strangers that aren’t trying to be mean they can change your life and you might start working out or eating better, etc. and if you are already doing those things like you say you are maybe it’s a way to look at what you’re doing and really think deeply. Are you doing enough? Are you eating things you shouldn’t be and telling yourself well I worked out really hard today or I didn’t eat this other bad food so I deserve this because of that so it could turn into a positive. I personally know I have done that to myself where I thought while I’m doing all this working out I’m eating really well and I am not losing the weight. I want to lose and really what it turned out to be was. I wasn’t pushing myself the way I should’ve been and I really wasn’t eating, as healthy as I should’ve been when I started doing that that’s when I saw the difference, again, I’m only trying to turn it into a positive. I’m not saying what he said was right I’m just trying to turn a negative into a positive.
No that’s ok. I welcome your comments. I know some people say petite or tall but he also followed it with big. Also I am not tall I am 5 ft 4 so I don’t think he meant that. Yes I know what you mean about using it as inspiration to do more. I have been training 4 times a week for 18 months now and also looking at nutrition so I am already on a good path. It will just take me a while to get to my goals. So I think that is why I am able to reflect and reframe and not be upset about the comment as I know I am doing a lot of things to make changes etc. It’s all good. As I said in my video that years ago I would have reacted very differently to now. So it’s all good. X
@@Wildunfiltered i’m glad you’re taking the positive and not letting it get to you. You look great as you said you’re trying really hard and he will continue to feel and look better and better and like you said I’m sure he didn’t say it to try to upset or hurt you, and, of course, I can totally understand how you feel
As a petite girl I wish I could be like you & rock the styles I can’t now you are beautiful & everything looks so shic on you
That’s very sweet x
Dear Deb, I am so sorry that a shadow fell on your beautiful trip, which was supposed to be fun. I was in that situation before and I felt the client advisor indicated I should hide my body behind a big bag. But that is No. 1 an oldfashioned opinion and No. 2 pointless, because you cannot hide your body anyway and No. 3 above all you shouldn`t want to hide yourself at all. Thank God you don`t, Deb, otherwise you would never expose yourself on youtube and we were not able to watch all these beautiful videos. So happy you do! Other than that I like the bigger bag on you, it looks really different, cool and modern as a shoulder bag. I could not wear such a big bag, I would make me look even shorter than I am. But you are tall (not big), you can wear this. The smaller one ist less outstanding. And I don´t think I like this bag style as a crossbody at all, although it is obviously meant to be worn differnt ways. I am looking foreward to your next videos 😘😘😘
Thank you so much. It was shocking but on reflection it’s something I am not going to dwell on. I don’t want it to put me off the bag as it was really lovely x
I don't think the SA was fat- shaming you. You're not fat, first of all. Our body shape and proportions do matter though, in how bag sizes look on us. You asked, he was trying to be helpful.
I was at the doctors recently, and he kept telling me how unbelievable thin I am. I know, lost too much weight, but a doctor just randomly tells me that like 5 times during the appointment, didn't even have anything to do with the reason I was there lol. I found it uncomfortable, but didn't think he was trying to insult me, just maybe more like thinking out loud.
My point is, no need to try and search for insults, where there is none :) You look fabulous 🥳
Thank you. Yes I do think he was trying to help but was clumsy with his words. People seem to think it’s ok to mention our body size/shape. I know it’s how I feel about myself and so it hit a nerve. X
I feel the same. He wasn’t fat shaming. He just said what he saw and how he saw it. I don’t understand the extra sensitivity.
Personally, I'm not particularly sensitive about people talking about my weight or my issues in general. I mean, I've seen myself in a mirror, I'm definitely overweight and possibly obese. As long as you accept how you are, those statements just become observations and not as emotional as people make it out to be. Like if you think I'm thin, you need an eye appointment 😂. I openly discuss my weight, finances, performance issues at work, etc. with people around me. It feels very liberating, and people can give you honest advice they wouldn't normally give.
Deb, first of all, you are not a large person and you are very fit. Please do not let this person get into your head. Second, I completely disagree with his opinion-the smaller bag looks way better! I’m so sorry that the SA was so insensitive with his words. I’m glad you did not purchase anything from him.
Thanks love. I haven’t dwelled on it so it’s all good. I did love the bag in both sizes. Dilemmas dilemmas!
@lou8131 not sure what you are referring to! ?
My mouth dropped at the comment from the Loewe SA!!! First, it’s not applicable to you, secondly it shouldn’t be said to ANYONE, and third, the larger size was in fact, too big for you! It swallowed you up!!! So glad you didn’t buy from that SA!…It really is a beautiful bag on you…especially the smaller size, both on your shoulder and crossbody!!! I did laugh at you breaking all of your rules, but as a once in a lifetime opportunity… so great you didn’t adhere to those rules!!!! Can’t wait to see all the treasures!!!! ❤
Thank you so much. I liked the smaller size too as it was more versatile as it could be cross body or shoulder bag. Re breaking my own rules - I couldn’t resist honestly! X
I hope that means you bought the bag!!!…just at a different store!!!
I am sorry you had to go through that, you are not fat. It's ridiculous that someone felt that was the proper comment to make. A simple, I like the larger bag would have been fine.
Yes he definitely could have been more tactful.
I am petite and hear all the time that I am to small for a big bag and that everyone will only see the bag and not me. And if I try on a smaller bag then they would tell me tings like "Yes, you can pull that of sense you are so small". So, I guess we have to follow their "rules" 😂 otherwise we will hear it. I do not think he meant it to come out like that ❤
No I don’t think he meant to offend me but I find it strange how people think it’s ok to comment on someone’s size. X
These SAs are just out of touch these days. As a black woman, I don't purchase from where I'm made to feel uncomfortable (Louis, Tom Ford, Chanel). Good for you on walking out. I'm not a fan of Loewe, never have been. To each their own taste, but I just don't see the lure; and certainly not if they're going to shame their potential customers. At the end of the day, it's all leather. These brands need to recognize the power of good customer service, which starts with training and zero tolerance for bad behavior.
More training needed but also some plain common sense would also help x
@@Wildunfiltered Exactly!
Wow... I hope you walked right out. You didn't ask about your body type, YOU ASKED ABOUT THE BAG! WOW. I would have gone with the crossbody option one btw and I'm not a petite woman and I'm quite bigger than you!
Exactly - I didn’t ask which suited my body shape - I commented that I didn’t know which I preferred more. Lessons learned x
The smaller crossbody looked good on you, the larger bag was, sorry...but it was ugly, that big lumpy handle? Nope! Thank you for teaching me how to say Loewe !
I loved it x
Can’t take my eyes off that Constance❤
It’s a beauty x
I think you misunderstood him, honestly I think he was saying you are tall, not talking about your weight. I understand your point but if someone told me I wasn't petit, I wouldn't think they were talking about my weight but my height, cause definitely I'm not 5' and unless it's an optical illusion neither are you 😅 I loved to see the green crossbody on you 😍 but then I also love burgundy so it's a hard choice 😁 can't wait to see more about your girls meeting since I'm following the majority 😅😂😂😂
Thank you. I’m 5ft4 so definitely not tall. We had an absolute blast. Can’t wait to reveal all!
@@Wildunfiltered I'm the same height as you and we aren't petit, I'm sure that you as me see daily women that aren't as tall as us. I'm still convinced he wasn't talking about your clothing size and speaking of clothing... That coat from the footage looks gorgeous on you 🥰
@@lindapassos thank you so much x
Wtf ! You were fat shamed??? You are not fat. I’m shocked, he could have said nothing. That was cruel - you are lovely.
That’s very sweet of you x
You’re welcome - It’s true. Say hi to my fellow Aussies over there.
@@kerriesmith666 aw! They are back in Australia now. They were amazing to meet. So lucky x
First of all, this SA needs some sales assistance and I think he was trying to help, I don't think he was fat shaming you but actually trying to help you. For example, he could have said, "well if you are seeking a bigger bag, you definitely can pull that off but if you are looking for a smaller crossbody, then the small one". Please don't waste your thoughts on this because of all the reasons you have stated. I personally liked the smaller one on you and I purposely did not listen to your words the first time around as I wanted to form my opinion. So you see. I'm truly hoping he sees this and gains some knowledge; please don't hold Loewe and your love of the product accountable! If you love it, go for it and cudos to you for enlightening all viewers!
Thank you so much. Yes I chose to not dwell on it as it only makes you bitter which I don’t want to be. I chose to move forward and keep on with my goals. It won’t derail me. I loved the bag and I won’t let one silly comment stop me from buying from the brand x
Other people's, esp a stranger's unwanted opinion tho may hurt, us can be always misconstrued. Sometimes, we see ourselves differently in the mirror. It took me a while to accept even tho im 5'1 , as I aged, i did got thicker and some bags do look too small. Eventually, it's up to you if you wanted a small or big bag. We can only control what we think and feel. We also see others differently as they see themselves. Like we see them thick, but they find themselves slim. Our best weapon is to accept the truth .Try it, say you are thick, most likely people will say you are not😂. The trend now is, thin and slim is waif-like and that makes 98% of us on the thicker side.
It’s a strange one as I didn’t ask him which one suited my body frame. I was just saying I couldn’t decide which one I preferred. He had no need to bring my shape into it.
Its not just about the rules that you broke but how you will ever get to really use all your bags. 😮
I do try to rotate them so they all get used. X
Yes to the smaller green bag, it looks fabulous on you, but definitely don't buy it from that SA!
Thank you so much x
When you ask for an opinion then be prepared for them to give their opinion. At the end of the day it's their opinion. And...and you probably are larger than some and smaller than others, so what this person said is not wrong! The person was not trying to insult you. If he used the words that you mentioned in the video, then he was right. move on and if you were hurt then the reason is not him being rude but that you are insecure. If you are doing enough for health then that's good, be confident. It's a you problem not his problem. If your husband or your mother or your doctor said it, would it be insulting? The truth is the truth, take it or leave it but blaming others is not the way to go about it. Especially when said by someone who has something to lose by being straight with you. Your friends who are outraged are just being sympathetic.
Thank you for your comment. I agree that if I asked the question be prepared for their opinion. However I didn’t ask which looked best on me or which suited my body shape the most. In reality I said to him I didn’t know which I liked more. So he answered a question I didn’t ask. However I am insecure about my body shape and therefore it hit a nerve because I already feel sensitive about the subject. In this you are right that I got offended due to how I feel about myself. However I do say in the video that I chose to calm down and reflect and reframe and this is the work I am doing internally to lead a more tolerant life. X
With all due respect I don’t think what the sales associate said is fat shaming most of the public is not petite and I think those words were taken to hard
I agree! It’s the tone in which he said it. He didn’t say it meanly. He seemed like he was trying to help you make a decision. Weight is subjective and a sensitive subject.
@@idaranwa4370 since when is it shameful to be fat
Totally agree and because it’s often a sensitive subject it is more thoughtful to stay away from mentioning it.
Yes it does hit a nerve when we already feel insecure that’s why he maybe should have not said anything.
@@Wildunfiltered that is out of touch with reality if you go into a fashion boutique to be fitted your frame is referred to for purposes of helping you the term petite is for height 5feet 4 inches or less this relevant for bag strap length not all bags will fit all people and not everyone is petite I think the hyper sensitivity to size is even more pronounced when it cannot even be mentioned very unhealthy
He definitely did not chose his words carefully
He didn’t! 😞
Oof I'm so sorry he said that to you - absolutely unacceptable. There's no reason to comment on a persons body ever. I love Loewe as a brand so hopefully this experience won't put you off the brand.
No it definitely won’t. I still love the brand. X
Hi. I don’t think he fat shamed you. Im size 14-16 now but last year i was 18-20 and was looking at a Fendi mini baguette and was told, its better regular size because it looks like your body eats the bag. I could have felt ofended but in reality it’s true. Such small bags in big-wide hips like mine looks awkward. I guess the words could be different but the end point was the truth. I get you but don’t sweat it. They are not your friends. Most of them are in sales because they didn’t get too far in the education or enough training.
Hi. I agree that certain size bags may look different on different people. However his words were clumsy. I choose to move on and not take it to heart x
That smaller bag was better for you. It is not that tiny. It fit your body well and was beautiful.
Thank you so much x
I don't understand how the SA said you are "quite big". You're not big at all.
I remember one time I was shopping with my mom and my mom was looking at this shirt that was up high on a hanger, a SA came up to my mom and said " we don't have that in your big size". We left the store immediately. I was so angry I wanted to slap the SA. My mom isn't big either. I don't understand how people can say these things. I've worked in retail years ago and I would have never said that to a client. You wanna encourage clients, not make them feel shitty.
It’s crazy isn’t it? I don’t understand why anyone would think that’s a good sales tactic to insult someone. X
This is a golden rule that you never even comment on the customer’s body. In Italy they really know how to do it and only there. French are extremely judgmental - I experienced that in Luxembourg a lot at French brands, including Hermes 😂 they just look at you like you were size 56 and I’m French size 38🙈 so yes, people don’t get it, and young women are even more cruel to older women, it’s a fact.
It can be really hurtful x
People need to choose their words more carefully! Sorry that happened to you! You look fantastic btw!! You have a beautiful figure!
Thank you so much. That’s very kind x
The smaller puzzle looked better on you! But that’s not the point what the actual F that’s totally unacceptable, also what lazy styling advice he gave you - I’ve learned that I like micro or mini bags as well as big totes it doesn’t matter what shape you are.
Exactly. It’s about what you want to use the bag for. X
I’ve ordered the medium Celine Romy and I can’t tell you how many ppl have said I should have give with the large because of ‘proportion’ 🙄
@@beeshopspink it’s crazy! Buy what you love. X
I really felt for you deb I know how hard you have worked but he's a bloke and probably doesn't realise what he's said sound like he's done his own legs by even suggesting a bag wouldn't suit your size lol .... your lovely be you I think you look great
That’s so sweet. Thank you x
@@Wildunfiltered also I don't even get why he said it cos neither bag would it have made a difference!
Was he a foreigner? Because in Spanish for example to be big is not the same as being fat. It's more like being tall. To be called petite is more the insult because you're being called short. Maybe as Loewe is a Spanish brand the guy was a Spaniard and got lost in translation?
Yes I do feel he wasn’t meaning to insult me but I still feel he could have chosen his words better. I think he may have been French x
What he said may have been well-intentioned but it was very lacking in tact.
Plus he isn't right anyway! It depends on the design! On the purpose!
That bag is not boxy or bulky so it's actually veery comfortable and it's streamlined and that shape of the hobo it's PERFECT in either size on you!
It's a fabulous bag.
What a shame!
I've worked in retail and styling and he's not so well-informed and a bit thoughtless.
Plus you can break style and design rules. Of course you can, it's about intention.
It's good that it didn't have a jarring effect to your core. That's healthy.
Love this! X
I am so sorry that u were 'fat shamed' that's just awful especially when u are shopping, I have been body shamed many times in a few luxury stores , u are a completely normal size, even if u were not how DARE he!!
U are NOT 'quite big'!!!
They don't know what u are going thru but it shouldn't even be applicable! I don't think it's positive atall as u are not big!!!
I'm a new subscriber and I think ur fabulous ❤
Aw thank you. Welcome to the family! Love your comment thank you so much x
Your not even that big I’m just like whatttt. The shear audacity. You took that with grace.
Thank you so much! At any size or shape we don’t need other people commenting. I chose to not let it affect me but I also wanted to open a conversation about it. Thank you so much for your kind words x
I actually like the smaller bag on you. The big bag was too big.
I liked it too. Very versatile size. X
OMG! I am trying to think of a host of excuses! I’m hoping the SA had no life experience or maybe was speaking in their second language or maybe meant height not dress size, as it’s just appalling to refer to someone’s appearance. Full stop. I don’t even tell friends when they look nice because I don’t think that a female’s appearance is relevant. Ever. Thank you so much for sharing. It is only through discussion that we can change things. Love you lots xxx
Thanks love. Yes it’s how we deal with these things that’s important. I’m happy with how hard I’m working and I am feeling more confident every day. So I choose not to dwell on this. I am 5ft 4 so I’m definitely not tall. He meant what he meant but I choose to not worry about it. The more we talk about things the more we can move forward. X 😘