Brilliant. So kind, so deep and so helpful. Evolution at this point in society - at least needs to be talked about, openly! No shame. We are all trying (mostly!). Thank you, all of you. And Taub is a very important voice in the world of men.
My most inspiring moment in this presentation occurred just before the end when Coach Menachem alluded to the possibility that God is lonely. Because God's loneliness is at the heart of God's Creation, God's need to counter God's loneliness in an absolute sense, God's loneliness preventing God from being able to learn how to conquer e.g. God's anger, God's inability to express and share love, etc. Please devote a show to this topic alone and I'll be grateful. Shabbat Shalom Umevorach. 🤠
This was a great episode. Thanks for inviting Rabbi Taub on. He really gets it and he articulates men’s issues so well. I will share this episode with others.
The husbands might want to give, or are giving but their wives are not receiving ... To receive their husband wholeheartedly is an art that these days most women need to learn . May we each know our role clearly, honour it and enjoy it healthily and with serenity . Rabbi Taub got to ask the question clearly but was cut off elaborating more on it mid episode. BeezratHashem . Thank you for bringing these important topics to many people. G-d bless you .
There is a larger societal bias towards the female being the nurturer. Therefore, when the father receives full custody of his children in a divorce many people will be shocked to the point where without knowing any details will still try to bend over backwards to help the mother and shun the father. The father has to be incredibly strong, self assured and needs a really good support system, and strong lawyers and therapists who are willing to testify in court. Fathers can be forced to spend hundreds of thousand of dollars to ensure their children's safety-emotionally and sometimes physically. The schools will not give a break. Therapy has to continue maybe forever and there is constant strategizing. This is an overlooked group as well.
A stereotype is formed when a large percentage of a certain group behave in a certain way. It's sad for those who need to go through this battle, and they definitely need and deserve support. However, the bias is not without a basis
I feel like most of this is not a men's issue, but rather an issue with both sides. The pressure on orthodox adults in the male and female roles are abnormally high. Barely realistic, actually. We need to as a whole ease up a little on the narishkeit
I'm fascinated by that thought process. Is it a thought out decision after weighing the pros and cons, risk vs. benefits from both sides, or just a "that sounds hard ill skip it thank you"?
@@SoulWords True, most people's thoughts and decisions are based on preconceived notions and then in every interaction, what's noticed is the thing that proves the biases you already hold. However, from his words it seemed like it was just a "the chevrah thinks it's not a good idea so I do, too"
There are women, who go through the same in their marriage. They are expected to earn big part of the money, and not only that, function 200% in the household and child caring as well PLUS not allowed to speak up. It’s called emotional abuse- wether it’s the man or the woman…
Yes frum women work very hard as well (especially in the parts of the community where they are the breadwinners on top of everything). But "not allowed to speak up"? Where do you get that from?
I'm not aware of women in the community who are not allowed to speak up, in fact most of the women I know are very good at speaking up! Who is not allowing you? Anyone in an abusive situation should seek help.
@@letsgettserious many husbands, who want to learn (either because he wants to or otherwise he doesn’t fit in the circle) I think tend to ignore their overworked wifes .. and for the women it’s sometimes easier to keep quiet and continue the situation as is… if she doesn’t want to be looked as a failure because she is supposed to support the husbands learning. Nothing against learning- I think it’s amazing to devote his life to tora- but with the right balance of avoda and chesed…
@@wexp3382 That sounds horrible. If someone learns all day, they should have better middos than that. I think they just tend to not notice how overworked she is, or think its worth it for their Torah. There is also the flip side, where the guy wants to go to work and the woman pressures him to stay in learning so she looks good and he then doesn't work nor learn and feels worthless...while she tears herself apart self-righteously for nothing.
@@beans4853 sorry, I didn’t mean to sound horrible. I do know many men are also overworked and overloaded with what’s being put on them, and some young men today have to work very hard to please their wife’s. So it’s really just a two sided problem and a lack of middos, when one spouse feels used. No matter in which circles.
As a single Jewish father and convert absolutely love this video great video thank you all for outing this together
Brilliant. So kind, so deep and so helpful. Evolution at this point in society - at least needs to be talked about, openly! No shame. We are all trying (mostly!). Thank you, all of you. And Taub is a very important voice in the world of men.
Thank you so much. Going through the משפיע מקבל stuff now.
To husbands - I am awed at your noble role. And to the pressure- Wow. May you have serenity , support and strength thru it all.
Thank you for your compassion.
My most inspiring moment in this presentation occurred just before the end when Coach Menachem alluded to the possibility that God is lonely. Because God's loneliness is at the heart of God's Creation, God's need to counter God's loneliness in an absolute sense, God's loneliness preventing God from being able to learn how to conquer e.g. God's anger, God's inability to express and share love, etc. Please devote a show to this topic alone and I'll be grateful. Shabbat Shalom Umevorach. 🤠
This was a great episode. Thanks for inviting Rabbi Taub on. He really gets it and he articulates men’s issues so well. I will share this episode with others.
Thank you for watching. It was the beginning of a conversation. We need to do more.
The husbands might want to give, or are giving but their wives are not receiving ... To receive their husband wholeheartedly is an art that these days most women need to learn .
May we each know our role clearly, honour it and enjoy it healthily and with serenity .
Rabbi Taub got to ask the question clearly but was cut off elaborating more on it mid episode. BeezratHashem . Thank you for bringing these important topics to many people. G-d bless you .
Very true. I believe that woman being breadwinners eroded that ability to a large degree.
There is a larger societal bias towards the female being the nurturer. Therefore, when the father receives full custody of his children in a divorce many people will be shocked to the point where without knowing any details will still try to bend over backwards to help the mother and shun the father. The father has to be incredibly strong, self assured and needs a really good support system, and strong lawyers and therapists who are willing to testify in court. Fathers can be forced to spend hundreds of thousand of dollars to ensure their children's safety-emotionally and sometimes physically. The schools will not give a break. Therapy has to continue maybe forever and there is constant strategizing. This is an overlooked group as well.
A stereotype is formed when a large percentage of a certain group behave in a certain way. It's sad for those who need to go through this battle, and they definitely need and deserve support. However, the bias is not without a basis
What stereotype? Where do you get your opinion on stereotypes? Perhaps that should be the first place to look.
I feel like most of this is not a men's issue, but rather an issue with both sides. The pressure on orthodox adults in the male and female roles are abnormally high. Barely realistic, actually. We need to as a whole ease up a little on the narishkeit
And yet we're doing as a community far better than the very extreme 'narishkeit' that's going on in the rest of the world.
@@cb1623 Oh, 1000%. That doesn't mean though that we should ignore our own issues. Just because it's worse out there
It is prevalent amongst young men that we have no interest in marriage, I'm a young 26 year old Lubavitch guy and I'm not getting married period.
I'm fascinated by that thought process. Is it a thought out decision after weighing the pros and cons, risk vs. benefits from both sides, or just a "that sounds hard ill skip it thank you"?
Lol it's a Mitzvah 🤷🏻♀️
@@beans4853 The "thought out decision" usually comes after the extreme negative emotional associations with marriage were already formed.
@@SoulWords True, most people's thoughts and decisions are based on preconceived notions and then in every interaction, what's noticed is the thing that proves the biases you already hold. However, from his words it seemed like it was just a "the chevrah thinks it's not a good idea so I do, too"
Get therapy about your parents' relationship with each other. Hang in there to straighten your thinking with dialectical behavioral therapy, DBT.
There are women, who go through the same in their marriage. They are expected to earn big part of the money, and not only that, function 200% in the household and child caring as well PLUS not allowed to speak up. It’s called emotional abuse- wether it’s the man or the woman…
Yes frum women work very hard as well (especially in the parts of the community where they are the breadwinners on top of everything). But "not allowed to speak up"? Where do you get that from?
I'm not aware of women in the community who are not allowed to speak up, in fact most of the women I know are very good at speaking up! Who is not allowing you? Anyone in an abusive situation should seek help.
@@letsgettserious many husbands, who want to learn (either because he wants to or otherwise he doesn’t fit in the circle) I think tend to ignore their overworked wifes .. and for the women it’s sometimes easier to keep quiet and continue the situation as is… if she doesn’t want to be looked as a failure because she is supposed to support the husbands learning.
Nothing against learning- I think it’s amazing to devote his life to tora- but with the right balance of avoda and chesed…
@@wexp3382 That sounds horrible. If someone learns all day, they should have better middos than that. I think they just tend to not notice how overworked she is, or think its worth it for their Torah. There is also the flip side, where the guy wants to go to work and the woman pressures him to stay in learning so she looks good and he then doesn't work nor learn and feels worthless...while she tears herself apart self-righteously for nothing.
@@beans4853 sorry, I didn’t mean to sound horrible. I do know many men are also overworked and overloaded with what’s being put on them, and some young men today have to work very hard to please their wife’s. So it’s really just a two sided problem and a lack of middos, when one spouse feels used. No matter in which circles.
Isn't Shalom Taskforce for both men and women?
Can you cite a case where they represented a man?