Helping a learner driver rebuild confidence after it was knocked.
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 14 มิ.ย. 2024
- Many people experience a knock to their confidence at some point when learning to drive. There are many reasons why someone can lose confidence, but what can an instructor do to help their pupil. In this video I try to help Emily rebuild some confidence after a bad experience with controlling a manual car.
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This video is a guide intended to help people who are learning to drive with a driving instructor in Great Britain, it is by no means a replacement for driving lessons with an appropriately qualified driving instructor.
Laws and driving rules may be different in your country. The makers of this video cannot be held liable for any consequences caused by any information that is in any way inaccurate, misleading or missing. The makers of this video are not liable for any person's driving other than their own, it is the responsibility of the person driving a vehicle to ensure they drive safely and within the law. The makers of this video are also not liable for any person failing a driving test as a result of the information provided in the video.
00:00 Knowledge, Skill, Confidence, Attitude
01:12 Understand, Rationalise, Accept, Practise
10:18 Not everyone finds learning to drive easy
13:10 Practise with confidence support
18:06 Discuss
23:53 After 1 hour of practise
32:13 Did the lesson help?
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Exactly a year ago my first ever driving instructor dumped me after 6 lessons. I'm in my forties, she was in her twenties, and she basically said I was not 'retaining information' fast enough and she could not 'progress' with me. During that final lesson she had yelled at me for not looking in my wing mirror on a roundabout, despite the fact that it was only the third time we'd done it and there were no vehicles on or near the roundabout at the time. After this I completely closed up, too afraid to ask anything for the remainder of the lesson. That resulted in me messing up a parking manouver, after which she swiftly 'finished' with me. The blow to my confidence was devastating and ruined my whole Xmas. Her harsh words actually had me wondering if I had some sort of learning disability (even though I'd achieved a uni degree without any bother). Last week I passed the test after a year of self study, mostly using this channel. I probably could have done it faster with a decent instructor but after that experience I couldn't bring myself to seek out another one. I want to say to any instructor watching this video that emulating Richard's approach to nervous students will result in a massive improvement. Watching this clip was literally reliving the event only with a better outcome. An impatient instructor is actually worse than no instructor.
Sounds like it was your instructors teaching that was the problem. I’m glad you passed :)
What an achievement learning with self help! Congratulations on passing!
yeah that sounded like a terrible instructor you had. Congrats on the pass buddy, well done
I just got that yesterday, not that my instructor gave up on me, but all the yelling and impatient. It basically makes me out of focus the whole lesson and also hesitate because you worried you're wrong again and get yell at or talk down to. And before the lesson I've been driving with my wife who has license for over 15 years and she says I am a good patient driver. Of course she is not an instructor, but at least I am not a bad driver deserve to get yell at. After the lesson the instructor knows that I've been quieter and try to ask me random things I bet just want to make me book more lesson with her. Good money I suppose. Sadly in Ireland it is mandatory to have 12 lessons to even book the test, so I'll be changing my instructor for sure, but even today I drove my wife and kids to town, I feel it that I am still having that bad experience in my head and I feel I drive worse. Hopefully the next instructor will be great.
That was not a good teacher and not someone who should ever be allowed to teach people what is, really, a life skill. I'm so sorry you had that experience.
Emily this was me!!! I've been driving for just 3 months since passing and I can tell you I ONLY felt confident once I started driving on my own and had to start problem-solving on my own. Focus on passing your test and the rest of the learning that comes after is going to skyrocket your confidence.
You can do this! Genuinely if I could, you definitely can :)
This was me as well! I struggled a lot and thought I was awful at driving, turns out all I needed was to relax and be confident
I got my license 4 months ago and just recently have been able to drive my car daily and know I’ll be just fine, and I actually enjoy driving! (never thought I’d say that lmao)
THANK YOU EMILY! Emily agreeing to do these videos has been amazing. I struggle with confidence myself (learning to drive at 50 feels like I’ll never get it) and this video has been so helpful. Emily, you rock! You are gonna be a great driver, I have no doubt!
i know how you feel im learning to drive im 53 been driving since febuary still got a long way to go
I’m 52. Test booked for January.
i past in june and im 55 you can do this
I started learning last September and passed this May aged 50, it can be done. I’m still not a confident driver but it is slowly improving and I’m out driving daily.
@@alisont308 can't wait to pass my test but will be awhile I'm only having 1hour lesson each week with an instructor congratulations
As a psychology student I love that you use basic CBT techniques to help Emily to feel more confident when driving. Your videos are super helpful especially after I failed my first test to feel better about myself.
I just want to give her a hug. I know how she feels. I’m 44 and have avoided driving all through my youth as I lacked the confidence. I’ve started again recently and I’m loving it. I have to battle with the feelings that I can’t learn new things, I’m annoying my instructor etc etc… just like Emily says here, but I see that it’s just old programming and it’s not actually based in fact.
I wish idve had the confidence to stick at it and pass my test when I was her age.
Emily, don't worry about honkers, ignore them and take your time. The more you rush, worse it gets. Relax as much as you can and enjoy yourself. You're doing great 😀.
Everyone learns at their own pace and no one was born knowing how to drive.
People honk at learners are bullies, and bullies are losers! Actually when I was learning, I thought of the L badge as an immunity to embarrassment. I’m learning, therefore I do stupid things, get over it! Just your luck to be stuck behind a learner mate! And that’s also the reason after I’ve passed, I displayed a pair of P badges on my car for over half a year until I was fully confident. I felt better with a P badge when I did something silly, when I took more time to park and hold people up. I’ve been upfront about it, so sorry but not sorry.
I see so much of myself in Emily. I was such an anxious learner, I put doing lessons off until I was 32. I dreaded every single lesson, and would have to shower and change after as a result of sweating so much. I just didn't enjoy lessons, at all. But I kept going to prove to myself I could do it. Keep going, it genuinely does get easier.
That's amazing! Well done 👏 I'm almost 25 and learning to drive, have been learning for a year and just failed my test unfortunately but I want to pass so bad so I'll keep going! I just switched instructors because mine was very critical of me and got frustrated from my mistakes often.
Same here! 🙌🏻 A super anxious learner, I only mustered the courage to start learning at 39! I was sick with anxiety before each lesson, totally wiped out after... 🥵 needed a shower and a lie down every time! 😅 But I stuck with it to prove to myself that it could be done, and the sense of achievement when I passed a year ago was simply the best feeling ever! Being able to drive totally changed my life and helped with self-confidence in other areas of my life. So definitely worth pushing past the discomfort and sticking with it!
Awwwh I’m glad you got through it! Well done to you
@ryebread44 you sound like me. I suffer with anxiety. I am on medication for this. But I don't like going fast. I get sweaty. First time I took my test I took my driving instructor with me don't know why? I think I thought it would make me calmer but it didn't because there was two people watching me. Second time I don't know how I took the examiner on my own. But I was so stressed and worked up I don't know how I did it.
I got my driving license at 40 years old. It took me a looooong time to get comfortable with driving. I still suck at figuring out the size of my car while parking and I suck at reversing. I will never be a "good driver", but I am and will always be a safe driver, cause I don't let my guard down at any point and I meticulously follow the rules of the road.
You are a good driver no driver is perfect
@@hybridangel3403 Thank you. You're very kind :)
I’m 40 and had my first driving lesson last week 😊
How did it go?? @@chrissy8386
If you are a safe driver, you are a good driver. I consider myself a good driver (not perfect by any stretch though!), but I suck at reversing (and I have an automatic). I'm better now that I have a car with a reversing camera and those beeping sensors (not sure exactly what they're called). I've been driving for 35 years!
Emily's courage in agreeing to be videoed as she goes through one of the most stressful things you go through in life is outstanding. She reminds me so much of myself when I was a learner - I didn't have the confidence in the skills I was learning and developing, for the longest time. Emily, you are not a bad driver. You're in control of the car, it's not in control of you. You're showing awareness of the road conditions and the other vehicles around you. Don't let a few impatient people knock your confidence and persuade you that you're a bad driver. You're learning - we were all learners once, the impatient drivers have just forgotten what it's like to be in the driver's seat the first few times.
This video was uploaded six months ago, I hope there's one - or will be one soon - where you hold up the test paper and show us you've passed. Because you absolutely have the ability and can learn the skills, and you've got a really good instructor.
I swear you do more here than some therapists I've had!! I wish all instructors were this patient!
Yes he is very patient and understanding.
I felt that "I don't like driving anymore" in my bones. This was basically my experience. I used to be so excited to drive, I would've even consider it relaxing. Once you realise all the things that can happen, and all the mistakes you and others make, it gets to you. I felt such anxiety before each lesson, it just wasn't fun like it used to be. You get over it if you have someone like Richard who's clearly very enthusiastic about driving. Having a good mentor that helps a lot and getting over fear with someone who can empathize will help you realise all the fun things that can come with driving ! Emily, watching you drive I noticed how much of a natural you are ! Whatever you might think about it, you're talented, with enough practice you'll be among better and safer drivers on the road ! Best of wishes 💞👋
I hope this comment sticks with you - it took me years of learning to drive to get the confidence to take a driving test. Years. I had some really horrible experiences that gave me a lot of trauma triggers with driving. I am so hypercritical of everything I do - I constantly felt like I was doing everything wrong. The thought of getting in the driving seat would make me feel ill and shaky and my whole digestive system would be a mess every time. I was overthinking everything and petrified of doing something wrong, constantly frustrated with why I couldn't get driving as quickly as everyone. Driving was overwhelming. Your sticking points are traffic lights - I really really struggle with going over 50 mph and panic every time I have to go onto a dual carriageway or motorway. I had multiple different instructors and my confidence was so low. It took me sitting down and crying hard that I might just fail, accepting that it was possible that I may never get to the standard of taking a test, let alone passing one. I felt like I was the only one so bad at driving. And in that deep acceptance of it's okay, I stopped beating myself up about mistakes. So what if people get frustrated, so what if they get annoyed with me, so what if I take longer than other people. And guess what - I passed last year, first time. I did the test convinced I had failed. One year on of driving independently I still get the anxiety and I still struggle with my triggers but, even though it's been slow progress, I am a completely different driver after 1 year. I have really shocked and surprised myself - and I think that's the toughest thing to accept - that how you feel about things right now CAN and WILL change. Isn't that incredible? I would not have believed that when I was learning. It would have felt impossible. But you will surprise yourself ☺
I needed this. Thank you. 👏
Emily, thank you so so much for doing these videos, you have no idea how much they help. I'm learning to drive at 36 and have probably had a similar number of lessons to you. My steering is atrocious. So bad. So unbelievably bad! Richard is right, seeing someone else struggling with the same things as I am is so reassuring. We're not alone, we can do this!!
I was a very bad learner always doing the same mistakes and my driving instructor shouted at me so many times
I changed driving instructor, she was amazing and really patient with me
I kept doing mistakes but less and less until I passed my driving test at my 8th attempt
As long as you keep improving yourself it’s the most important, learning to drive is not easy for all of us, and I had to accept it and carry on …
26:33 is another example of why you're such a great instructor Richard! You were calm, didn't overreact or cause Emily to panic but at the same time you quickly drew attention to the black car without it feeling stressful and gave her a chance to think & fix the problem herself. Your videos helped me immensely when I passed 4 months ago
Overreacting while with the newbie driver is worst thing you can do
When I learned to drive 10 years ago, my instructor was an ex road traffic officer and he was outstanding, nothing was too much trouble and if I didn’t feel comfortable with something we stayed on it until I really got used to it. He gave loads of great advice but 3 simple tips to always stay safe and reduce nerves which have always stayed with me.
1. A good driver is someone that knows who and what is around them at all times and can judge situations well.
2. Do not always trust indicators, read body language if possible and look at the position of the wheels, wait for their turn.
3. Relax..Driving is easy, enjoy it. But stay safe from other road users who are not good drivers, anticipation etc.
Of course there’s more to it but those really helped, so simple and allowed me to be very observant all the time.
I still enjoy watching driving videos from time to time and can appreciate a good instructor which you are!
I definitely can relate to the feeling of "ugh the instructor is outside i don't wanna do this" but with literally anything in life, the more hours you put in, the better you'll get. No matter how slow a learner you are, no matter how "untalented" you are, the more hours you put in, the better you'll get. Talent, in my opinion, isn't real - everyone can be as good as anyone else, it's just a matter of time.
After passing, I really enjoy and look forward to driving around. I definitely took more lessons than average, but it was just a matter of time. As long as you don't give up, you *will* eventually get to pass-ready standard.
100% Agree. That's why I hate when the instructor tells you did something wrong, in the worse possible way, and make you feel guilty, almost like you killed someone xD
You're doing great Emily. It took me until my 30s to learn after first trying at 17, then again in my 20s, each time giving up because I was so unconfident and nervous about driving. Don't give up like I did, you're much closer to being a fully competent driver than you think
We’ve all been there Emily! I’m in my early fifties and can remember learning to drive as a teenager. I lacked confidence at times (everyone does) but you can do it! Nobody is born knowing how to do anything….we all learn from scratch. Keep going and you will get there 😊🍀👏🏼. And remember too, there’s no such thing as perfection in driving but there is safe.
I'm afraid of driving too.But reading all these comments just warms my heart soo much.So much of encouragement and support.✨
TH-cam comments has my heart❤
If only other driving instructors would know as much about the psychology of teaching as you do. This video helped me get a fraction of my confidence back too :) Fantastic job, thank you for both of you.
Oh Emily, I totally get why you feel a bit discouraged - I had several moments like that when I was learning last year where it felt like I was just not making much progress, I was dreading my lessons and just wanted to quit... 😔
My self-belief was at rock bottom after making a few mistakes that completely knocked my confidence, plus my instructor, bless his heart, told me I was the worst case he'd ever seen when it came to steering... 😅 And then suddenly, after I doggedly stuck with it and rode out the worst bit, it all began clicking into place and I started making crazy-fast progress and enjoying lessons again!
I don't think I'll ever LOVE to drive but ultimately, the sense of achievement, the independence and freedom that having a licence is going to give you will be TOTALLY worth all the hard work, trust me!
I think you're a bit of a perfectionist like me and you beat yourself up for not being good at things right away, but if you accept that as a learner you're bound to make mistakes and you'll be slower than experienced drivers around you, you'll make faster progress. Also, comparison is a thief of joy so don't look at others, we all learn things at our own speed.
So keep at it, I think youre doing fabulously well and you'll make a very safe and conscientious driver! ❤
I passed my test the other day with 2 minors and I think your videos seriously helped me. I'm quite analytical when it comes to learning I always have to know the reason instead of the answer, and your videos on the mechanics of a car such as when you explain transmission and how the clutch works (especially in the beginning) gave me such a good understanding of the car that I needed to drive smoother and allow my brain to focus on other things like steering and speed. Maybe it would help Emily too. Thanks for your help :)
That's great to hear! Thank you for watching and congratulations on passing!
Richard is right, she's actually very smart and picks up things really quickly. Easy to teach.
GO ON EMILY !!!! Keep at it and you will succeed. You're the sort of driver we need on roads, cautious and a thinker.
Emily, you got this! I had that lack of confidence myself but got over it. Just look at yourself: You’re absoutely rocking your driving lessons, cause you’re improving, building knowledge and experience. And all of that while being filmed! Believe in yourself and don’t care about some honking idiots around you in traffic, which are lacking empathy and respect. :)
You’ve got so much self-reflection and just need to use it for self-belief instead of letting it crush yourself!
Look at all the comments and trust yourself 😇 You’re not alone!
she seems like a nice person, hope she got the confidence now. the advice for driving and life was appreciated, she just sat and listened. i doubt she will ever forget you
My last instructor told me “ some people are natural drivers “ snd she’s been driving since the age of 12. She did nothing for my confidence or self esteem , so I got rid of her . I was so happy at starting my lessons and now I’m back to square one . I can’t get an instructor in my area it’s so annoying .
I failed my test today which I had booked since January, now the soonest I can rebook for is November. I’m devastated as I failed at such a notoriously tricky, very tight junction. My confidence has been completely knocked and I feel like there is no point getting behind the wheel again. It really was a knife to my heart and my instructor makes me so nervous so I don’t think I’ll take anymore lessons but I’m afraid I’ll lose my skills. Thank you for your content
Shame, the amount of courage Emily has to do this on camera. I passed at 32, I had the same worries, my thing wasn’t steering mine was the size of the car. Even now especially at night I have to turn the music off and focus 100%.
Right! Learning on camera seems like a whole new level of pressure. Hats off to Emily.
I just did my first lesson at night and driving in the dark is a totally different experience! Things I usually do well I was messing up on just because I was processing the changes from driving in the day.
Hi Emily and Richard. Emily, you are doing so well. I’m a Driving Instructor myself, and please trust Richard when he says “you’re not the only one”. I have a student who at 59 years of age, is revisiting learning to drive after a 40 year break. So far i have delivered 68 hours of lessons and he finds steering in combination with use of the other controls a big, big challenge. To see you steer the way you were is a massive foundation for future development and improvement. It can be so disheartening when you feel progress isn’t being made, but remember, a sculptor keeps chipping away small pieces until they end up with their masterpiece. You definitely have the right attitude, so keep going. Try to find the fun in even the most challenging of situations and take them as wins. Richard is taking responsibility for your safety and progress so relax, trust him and enjoy the process. Remember, all mistakes in life (in and out the car) are opportunities to learn. You’ll look back at your journey when you’re holding your pass certificate with the strongest sense of achievement, and that level of accomplishment and emotional elation cannot be bought but is oh so satisfying for us as instructors to see. Especially for those who we know it means so much to.
Thankyou for being patient and not ageist with your pupil. I had one instructor who actually mentioned not being able to teach an old dog new tricks!!😡
This really spoke to me. I'm learning to drive as an older person (45 years) and its not been easy. My instructor has behaved and made comments at times that have made me feel so small. He is also tough and pushes me to be better and for that I thank him. I have kept him as an instructor but taken on another one who is pretty laid back. I am more relaxed with this one but since I have been belittled so much, i almost feel like his attitude is way too casual. I'm so confused but desperately need to learn and pass!😢
Stop paying the first instructor and stick with the second guy from now on.
I wish you the best of luck. You got this😊.
Don’t stick with the one who made your confidence low. At the end of the day YOU are the one paying for the lessons, I’ll never understand harsh driving instructors….
Kudos to you Emily for putting yourself in front of the camera, I love watching you progress. After 16 years driving I am now driving with just 2 joysticks and a button! I miss the steering wheel so much! Confidence is my nemesis too and this year has been a journey of emotions having familiarisation lessons and trying to get used to a whole new set up. Watching you these last few months has helped me so much, thank you for allowing us join you on your driving journey.
I think everyone has a part of driving they struggle with when first learning to drive. Steering was my nemesis. Bouncing along all the grids at the edge of the road, arms crossed and knotted. It took time, but as Richard says - it's all about having confidence in yourself. I've been driving 30 years(!) now and still remember that most days it was enjoyable to be learning, some days it was not. Keep going - you'll get there. I'm enjoying watching your journey and it's a good recap for me too!
I got my drivers license 10 years ago and barely ever drove because my lack of confidence. This video made me get into my car and feel confident to go for a drive.
seems to be a lot of people who are the same, ive met a few that haven't drove ever since they got their license.
I know a lot of people like this and I’m in Germany where drivers license can cost up to 4000 EUR. Confidence on the road really is important
That's really great to hear! I hope you build your confidence up and start to enjoy your time behind the wheel.
Really enjoy your videos Emily and can see a massive improvement. I’m learning at the age of 35 and struggle with nerves too, I think a lot of it is wanted to be good straight away and putting to much of an expectation on myself! We learn more from our mistakes so it’s a case of trying to look at positives and what we learn when things don’t go so well instead of dwelling. Thanks for sharing your journey with us it’s really helping me. You’re doing great ❤
I think it's so important to see and be reminded that driving is a skill that doesn't come naturally to everyone. People like to brag about passing first time after a small number of lessons, but the reality is that it can be very disheartening when thats not the case for you. I completely sympathise with Emily as a fellow learner to whom confidence in driving doesn't come naturally, and who puts so much pressure on themselves to be comparable to drivers around them.
Thank you for being brave enough to share your journey with the rest of us, and please know that in doing so, you are helping so many fellow learners feel less alone in their own anxieties and confidence challenges.
You've got this! 😊
Just wanted to say that these videos and this video in particular have really helped me a lot in getting back into driving and building my confidence. I passed my test 7 years ago, however went to university shortly after and never got back behind the wheel due to lack of confidence, fear, anxiety, all sorts. I recently had to begin driving again due to getting a job in the industry I dreamed of, so the anxiety was hitting all over again. It’s been 2 months of driving again and whenever I feel anxious or out of my comfort zone, I know that that’s when the growth comes and that’s when I’m becoming a better driver! And Emily, the fact that you feel this way about how other people might feel about your driving will only set you up for being a safe and considerate driver going forward!
That sync outro was sick :P
Mad props Emily, take your time, enjoy it, don't stress about it, be eager to master driving and learning the correct actions.
mistakes will happen, the question is how you learn from them to not make them again and progress
Hey Emily, I started learning just a bit before you did. And honestly these videos are the reason my confidence isn't shot, knowing there are other people who are going through the same problems as me and overcoming them in their own way makes me feel so much better about the difficulties I face while learning. Don't beat yourself up, I can confidently say you're better at this than most full license holders I know lol. Long story short, thank you so much for agreeing to be in these videos, they are a massive help
I felt the exact same way Emily, i felt fed up with the lack of progress, I felt awful as my parents were funding my lessons and I was so negative about the process as a whole. BUT IT GETS BETTER!! I was able to pass my earlier this month!! You are doing fab! Keep working hard and don't give up! :)
Congratulations on passing!
Richard, you're an amazing teacher and even better human! Good luck to Emily, she got this! 🙂
Emily, I think you're a lot better than you think you are. I'd like you to remember a couple of points I'm going to share with you, nice people leave nice comments, good drivers forgive mistakes. Because we all started off as Learners, I stalled, I hit the kerb, I shoved it in the wrong gear, I pushed the clutch down first (and let it up too quick). I've never met Richard, but I know he's lovely, kind, patient and really good at his job. Trust Richard and trust yourself, you can do it!
I really hope she will build some confidence, not with driving but with herself in general. It's totally fine to need time to learn something, she probably learns other things so much faster than others, but needs a little more time with driving. She is a learner, no one should be mad at her. I totally get though that it can be devastating to get honked at, it happened to me recently on the bike even though it wasn't my mistake, but someone f**ed up and to save myself I ended up on the street instead of the bikeway, and someone screamed at me and used really hard words - I ended up shaking and crying in the middle of the street. That showed me, don't worry about one person honking at you, it's not even necessarily your fault AND even if it is - mistakes happen, as long as no one gets hurt it's just something to learn from.
Emily has improved so much! Loving the progress she's making, hope she keeps going.
Emily, you’re a legend. I took ages to learn to drive, I failed my test FIVE TIMES before I got it right. I was nervous, un-confident and made mistakes all the time. I feel I only started becoming a good driver after I passed, because I didn’t have the pressure then of having to pass my test. Now, I’m a very confident driver, but it took me a long time to get there. Trust the process, you’ve got a great teacher, you’re nailing this!
Don't give up! If you keep at it soon it'll all lock into place, it always does.
I can so much with Emily. I’m anxious learner as well and whenever i do my lesssons i always feel scared and having support like this helps a lot to ease learners anxiety and helps them gain confidence. Thank you for sharing Emily’s progress and struggles it helps me relate and gain confidence as well. You can do it Emily!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽💗. Thank you Richard!!
*i can relate so much i meant to say hehe
Emily, thank you so much for sharing your experience! I just started to learn in September, and it gets slowly as I have so far no opportunity to practice and 4 hrs a months, but still steering I must say is a definite challenge for me. There is many of us out there I guess, and that’s OK. We ARE learners and with practice I believe we will get there. Big hugs to you and massive thanks to Richard- it would be nice to have you in Scotland!! 🙌🙌😄
The URAP technique has been so so helpful for me as a novice learner (I can still just about count the hours I’ve had behind the wheel on two hands)
Being able to write exactly what the issue is and resolving them is helpful. It’s so easy being frustrated at yourself for doing something while learning and thinking “I suck, I’ll never be able to drive, all my friends are better than me, I’m useless, my driving instructor wants to give up on me now” but that rationale and acceptance really grounds you and says Trust. The. Process.
Which I think for new learners now is really hard because of instant gratification and social media, the constant peer pressure and comparison. Some days you’ll do good, some days you’ll do bad and feel bad but only way up from rock bottom 😊
What helped me with confidence was practise, checking myslef in different situations on a road, and changing my mindset with hypnosis as my fear came from my subconscious mind. I passed with 1 minor. I have been driving for almost a year now, and I love it.
I think she's awesome doing this. It's not easy to be filmed and thinking about others are judging etc. On that alone, you don't want to to b3 over confident
Thank you so much to the both of you for this video. Emily, I know it mustn’t be easy to broadcast your struggles to all of us on TH-cam but I do think it was an important video to make. A lot of us feel like that. I’ve got my license 2 years ago, didn’t have a problem at all passing my test (although a much easier one thank yours since I’m in another country, and a lot of people here are very irresponsible) but even after that, I sat in front of a steering wheel very few times because of being afraid and feeling like driving isn’t for me, even though I would like to like driving. This video has prompted me to work on improving my confidence, maybe even take a few extra classes since I’ve been so out of touch with driving. Simply thank you both!
Well done to Emily for the videos. I’ve been an instructor for over 20 years. I’d love to see a video of when she passes 👍🏻. Keep up the good work
It’s good to see Emily’s confidence towards the end of the video. Keep sticking at it Emily, you’re doing great!
Omg i love you having as my instructor your such a lovely person 💕❤❤❤
I getting ready to go for my driving lesson and am learning from Emily i hope i get a instructor like yours. Great job u give me convinced thanks.
The hardest thing is to see your own progress of how much better you are doing since starting, and trust me you will see it! Driving is a demanding activity to do it well and all this is doing is building your skills.
I used to get annoyed with people beeping but it's now just second had cringe at people that believe they know better and let me ASSURE you they almost never do. 'Experienced' drivers make risky decisions with the belief they are better, however in reality, you are then managing their driving because they have lost the basic skills they were taught in lessons.
I was saving my comment for the usual "Just passed my driving test thanks Richard!" But I wanted to thank you for making this video.
I'm 30 years old and I've been putting off driving lessons because of my self-confidence since I was at least 21 despite being urged to by friends, work colleagues, family. I started in October last year and I've been watching you and other videos between lessons to get as much help as I can. I don't have any access to a car so the only time I get behind the wheel is on my lessons so it's taken me a bit longer than normal but that's okay.
Even though I felt ready I made a mistake in the last 5 mins of my first driving test last week (my fault totally) and it cost me the pass. I've got another one booked in a few weeks and I find myself way more nervous for the second one now because I now know how easy it can be to blow it. I'm going to keep this video in mind next week while I wait for my test.
Thank you for making these videos not just the technique and control but the videos preparing mentally, you've helped so many people even ones like me who've been watching but haven't left a comment. Hoping to leave the comment I planned real soon!
I don't remember typing this comment. This is 100% me. I failed my 1st test because of a silly error on my part and I know i can drive but I'm over thinking the test more than i should.
Respect to you Richard for having such an amount of patience and cool.
Bless her, she's adorable. I'm sure your confidence will rise the more you drive Emily! You've absolutely got this, you're doing so well! 💪🏻
This is turning into a great video series, thanks!
THANK YOU EMILY FOR THE INSPIRATION.
Your fear is valid. I'm in similar situation.
Thank you Emily for being so real with us. I went through the same phase of hating driving and dreading my driving lessons for a while and then it got better when I authorised myself to be a learner i.e. to make mistakes, to struggle over and over with the same issues etc. Sometimes I'd come home after a lesson and I couldn't feel my legs because I was so stressed out lol.
Keep up the good work and try not to be too hard on yourself. I'm proud of you.
Hi Emily and Richard, Emily, don't listen to negative comments (if there are any?) Ask yourself one thing with a negative comment, who is saying it and what credentials have they got to back it up with? Answer, no idea because they could be anyone, even a person who isn't old enough to drive! Don't over think your learning process, see a mistake as a challange to overcome. Positively and think "i don't care who thinks what, I don't care how many mistakes I make, I will take this challenge on and I will overcome it and pass my test one day" go get em girl and f**k the haters. Great videos. Thankyou both of you 😊
You're doing great Emily, you're just going through the stage and things that a huge amount of learners go through. Also, a very well done for doing these lessons on camera. You'll be helping other people with exactly the same things that you're feeling.
The best instructor
what a lovely girl, you're a far better driver than me and it only took me 5 attempts to pass my test..... wish I had this guy to teach me. (except when he gets angry at you)
Oh my, this video is exactly me in 2020 summer when I was doing my driving license in Estonia. Exactly the same issue about worrying others possibly losing their patience and also stalling the car as my clutch control wasn't good (at least I was very uncomfortable about it).
Fast forward three years and I really enjoy driving. The confidence will come, just make sure not to compare yourself to others and don't rush yourself (take harder routes step-by-step).
Even though I have driving license for some time now, I still like to watch these videos to possibly learn something and remind me of learners' position. 🙂
struggled a bit in my lesson today and you totally put into words what was up! definitely progressing quicker watching your videos 🎉
I don’t think it’s necessarily driving that’s causing the self-doubt and anxiety, I think is just how Emily is feeling atm. It’s okay, we all go through these times.
It will all come together, just be persistent. From you’re first lesson I can see you’ve made huge progress already.
You got this Emily! You're definitely improving 👍
I have been watching these videos Emily, I just want to say they are certainly helping me. I am learning in my 50's😮 I lack confidence because I don't think I am good enough, but watching you face your fears is really helping me, keep going, because I need to pass my test, a challenge I have set myself, I can do that learning from both of you 👍
Thank you so much to you Emily. I've been learning awhile and I am exactly the same position as you and feel the same way. You've helped me to not feel so alone and above all you should be SO proud of yourself for learning and pushing yourself ❤
You’re doing amazing Emily! I’m also learning how to drive, it’s scary stuff and it’s far from easy. You’ve achieved so much already. Don’t let the impatient and rude drivers knock you back! They intimidated me to begin with, I take no notice anymore. They forget they were the learner driver once. Good luck, look forward to more videos 😊
I think you're doing great Emily, you've came so far within these videos!! and i'm sure many people will agree with that!
Double comment but just wanted to say as well, you're great for putting yourself out there, and trust me you are 100% not alone. You are far braver than you think. DO NOT GIVE UP !
Emily, keep going you will get there. This is so like me with my lessons, some I enjoyed but always anxious before and sometimes dreaded them. I never believed in myself even when others including my instructor said he believed in me. That’s carried on since I passed as I lack confidence in my driving but I’m now getting there and realise I can drive.
This has helped me so much - I understood why I've been struggling to get going despite learning so much at every lesson. I felt like instead of doing better with every lesson, I feel less comfortable. It's all to do with confidence and worrying about things that could happen and how my actions could upset other drivers. Thank you so much Emily for sharing this experience as it made me realise that subconscious I was giving myself a hard time because I was focusing on the wrong thing!
You are a very good instructor Richard. You know exactly what your learners need.
This video helped me so much! I have been a nervous driver all along and recently picked up driving again after not doing it for 6 years as I couldn't own a car. But I am at it again, although not without committing my fair share of mistakes! The part about acceptance is a must - I am slowly learning to accept that I would take time (and a lot of practice, and maybe some more mistakes) to be confident!
It was a very nice video to watch. I can say that Emily is a very smart and kind person. I guess she's trying to be too 'careful.' They say being smart is tiring, but in the long run, She'll be a decent driver because that's what smart people do! Good luck to everyone who's trying to get the license!
Richard's patience when Emily is getting frustrated and is sometimes rude to him is really amazing. Well done Richard.
Glad your pupil found some joy in driving. There's a lot of good points you make about confidence that can transfer to other walks of life. 😊
Keep at it. My steering was shocking at first, but we did a full 2 hour lesson on it and then it improved. Then I needed to tighten up my left turns. I have my test next week. Don't let a mistake get you down, as a minor mistake can turn into a serious/dangerous one if you dwell on it. No driver is perfect.
You got this Emily! You're definitely improving 😊
Thank you, Emily, for agreeing to be filmed during a lesson. What an incredibly brave thing to do! Especially at a time when your confidence in your driving is the lowest it will ever be (it will grow higher every single time you get behind that wheel). I have an anxious daughter who is just learning to drive and seeing another young person actually having the same feelings has resonated with her far more than my telling her she's "not the only one" could ever do.
And Richard, your gentle and practical manner, understanding, and explanations have helped her realise the instructor is not sitting there internally sighing and getting angry. This video has been a light bulb moment for her and helped her confidence beyond measure! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.
Thank you so much for this video and thank you for agreeing to be filmed Emily. Also, people putting pressure on you and what you're doing says a lot about them - you're doing great. I've got my test on May 14th 2024 and this video has really helped me get in a better mindset - especially making my driving instructor mad if I do something wrong. We've got this Emily 💜
Good luck with your test!! Get a good night's sleep beforehand, and just take things easy, it's really no different from a lesson. You're just showing the instructor what you know, that's all.
@@Teverell Thank you - I've been really suffering from mock test nerves so will definitely try this next time.
Well done Emily, you’re doing great!
As an instructor myself, I see pupils struggle with certain elements of their driving on a regular basis, so you’re not alone, it’s all part of the process, it’s a new skill you’re learning (we’ve all been there) and it’s your learning journey, so don’t worry about what others think on the roads, just focus on yourself.
You seem like a fun pupil to teach too, really keen and entertaining.
I wish you all the very best, good luck with it all 👍
I'm late to the video so not really sure how much of an impact I'll have. But I want to reassure that learning is difficult, especially in modern times AND with lessons being on TH-cam. That's a whole extra level of brave.
I've been driving over 15 years. I passed my test 3rd time after over 40 hours of lessons. However, from there, I've spent over 10 years in logistics and parcel delivery. I've driven across the UK and Europe in a variety of (3.5t) vehicles and in a lot of unfamiliar locations. I like to think I'm good at it and I've never had any bumps or incidents around them.
I remember, especially after failing my second test, walking to work and looking at every single car and thinking "why can they do it and I can't?". I honestly thought at points I would never pass.
Learning is just that and is no sign of your driving ability at all. I've always made sure I've given learners plenty of space and patience because I fully empathise with how difficult it is.
I've no doubt at all that Emily will pick it up and have many years of happy, no issue motoring. Excellent work on the emotional intelligence too, Richard. Real class.
You got this, Emily! I'm also in the middle of my journey to getting my license, and I can totally relate to what you're feeling! My instructors are great but not as kind and compassionate as Richard. And if I can progress with their help, Richard would definitely be able to help you too! And what he said was true, whenever you get frustrated with your mistakes, just remember, you're not the only one making mistakes. That helped me heaps and gave me courage and confidence to progress. Best of luck to you!
Emily is my favorite series helps alot
It took me about 7 or 8 months of weekly lessons to learn how to drive, and confidence was a big thing I struggled with. Emily you are doing amazing don’t worry! Richard you are an amazing instructor, you remind me a lot of the instructor I had, always calm and reassuring. It really does help in the long run!
Hello Emily, I’m 34 and I’m 8hrs into my lessons and I just want to say you have been so wonderful to watch as you reassure me very much - I am on of the 20% that struggled with steering also. So thank you for driving on camera because there’s no WAY I could be that brave.
I’m doing 5hr semi intense lessons every Monday in Bude (Cornwall).
I’m Debbie, nice to meet you and thank you so, so much xxxxx
Ps are you still doing videos? I’d love to see your progress
Emily, you are a superstar! 🌟 You have the skills, the talent and the courage to drive like a pro. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise or make you doubt yourself. Don't let the haters get you down, they are just jealous of your awesomeness. You can do anything you set your mind to. YOU'VE GOT THISSSS!!! and Richard is great teacher, props to him. and lastly good luck on your journey to becoming an awesome driver!!
Awww Emily and Richard, this is what I need. I was able to drive to the supermarket via multiple traffic lights, turns, roundabouts etc but suddenly I kept stalling at traffic lights / entering at roundabout, and I lost the basic skills like clutch control and staying in lanes, or going to wrong exits... It is good to know that can happen to anyone. Thank you for the videos.
Focus, Focus, Focus. It's simple but crucial. Thank you so much, Richard ❤ Thanks, Emily 🌹
Keep your head up emily you have a wonderful instructor with richard i learn a lot of great tips as a learner driver watching these videos don't put yourself down dust yourself off and go again
I needed this video! I recently failed my practical test after learning to drive for over a year and was super upset. My instructor regularly got frustrated at me and when I failed she told me she didn't have time in her schedule for us to continue weekly lessons because she was taking on new learners. I've decided to switch instructors in hope that my new one will show me more patience and kindness.