Ladies do NOT give money to people for a house unless you’re sitting at a table with a realtor and title agent, signing documents to deed property in your name.
I notice many such men make sure they ask and enquire about these things EARLY in the relationship; even had them ask 'is this your own home?' on first visits or dates. They have a mission and agenda and it's all about themselves@@saritamoorebansa4485
Just bought a house six months ago with the realtor, title agent, and even my banker present at the signing. I can only imagine this level of pain as it makes me distrusting of others (especially men) when it comes to money. So sorry that this level of theft and deceit happens to anyone and I hope that these losers pay dearly for the havoc they reek in other people's lives.
You’re very SMART AND INTELLIGENT. I handle all our money bec my husband said from the start, he don’t like saving money or paying his bills on time. Oh hell no, I’ve always paid my bills 2 weeks ahead of time and I saving 20% of my paycheck. In 5yrs he understood why, he could actually buy our vacation home without me, he left out that bank like he won money. After than he start saving money from his business he had.
I just don’t understand how people can be so gullible for love- it’s really puzzling to me 🤷🏽♀️ red flags was all over this. This is not meant to be demeaning. I’m wouldn’t give that money to anyone. It would’ve went from my hands to the bank that was supposed to be closing on the house
EXACTLY. I don't know why everyone keeps harping on the fact they're not married. A close friend of mine had this happen to her & her mom by the Pastor and Church they attended. It was a complete scam. Other people played a part in the scam ...there was fake paperwork drawn up and Everything. Stop Victim Shaming. This is Wrong no matter the circumstances. He Stole her Money. SO SAD😢 BIG IPS TO YOU SIS FOR SHARING YOUR STORY. Don't be ashamed. Much love to you and your new guy.
People will never learn, that's why scamming is a yearly multi-billion dollar industry. As I type this, thousands of women (and men) are handing over their savings to scammers, despite all the victims they see, like this lady, and the many warnings. Scamming also involves celebrities, and others, who are newly slim from taking the latest popular weight-loss drugs and have now begun peddling expensive weight-loss scams on the Internet, or have had cosmetic surgery on their face and is promoting expensive anti-aging skin-care programs online.
I went through a similar situation with my ex-husband. He turned out to be a fraud but up until I connected the dots he was good to me, a partner, best friend, soul mate. When I confronted him he took off without a word and took all funds within 45 minutes. I never heard one thing from him or about him until his daughter contacted me when he had a massive stroke resulting in death. I never allowed myself to mourn the dissolve of our marriage nor any of the pain he caused me and kept moving forward working hard. I have officially been through abuse, adultery and now abandonment. I mourned it all at one time once he passed away. It was horrible but I made it through.
I don't know you but I am happy as a woman to see you are trying to heal, may God continue to give you the strength you need to get pass this part in your journey call life.
The moral of the story is make sure your husband can afford a home. Don’t ever in life try to play house with a soul , I don’t even send my husband of 20 years any cash.
The moral of this story is Not to buy a house with someone you're dating. Come on. Put a sign on the door of your heart that says 'Demonstrated commitment is required. " No marriage license no monetary investment.
Well you know people get married buy a house and then the husbands kills the wife and sometimes kids so no guarantees about what a relationship status guarantees
FACTS, she needed to pray for the Lord to take the gullible trait away from her and move in silence, the brother wouldn't of ever known she even had those resources if she'd kept it to herself until the I Do was completed
This story is filled with lessons... I'm grateful that she was able to recoup some of her money and find love again but in this interview she never said what lesson she learned from this experience. From what I can hear the main lesson was " don't treat a boyfriend like your Husband " A boyfriend does not deserve to lie in bed next to you for 18 months. A boyfriend does not deserve large sums of your money for anything. Men typically don't respect women who give them full access to their body and their money just for "showing up "
You preached a word. Thank you. You're like me. I listen for "what did you learn" messages. When I don't hear them say that or push to say that, I know they haven't learned anything. The issue will just show up again in another form and with another face.
She did say be mindful and if something feels off than it is. Sometimes that is enough. I don’t know why someone of us need a whole building to fall on us to get the picture!!
I'm glad she didn't stop fighting after the police said they couldn't help her and that she's getting some of her money back. The story is a bit confusing to me, however. Why give the scammer boyfriend her money for a house anyway? She could have purchased whatever she wanted on her own. As far as I'm concerned, a woman should run as soon as a man she's not married to starts asking anything about her money!
Yep. I had a bf from when I lived in the Caribbean. We continued the relationship when I migrated. He wanted my pin # and ATM card from back home, I did not give it to him. Then he kept telling me about investments I could do back home, I told him that I was not interested. I want my investments to be where I live. He was upset about it and that told me all I needed to know about him. I can gladly say that he got none of my money.
Never buy a home with someone who isn't your spouse. And if you do, handle it with the assistance of an attorney. Problem solved. She made a foolish decision to begin with. Hope she recovers all of her money and "Javier" ends up messing with someone who plays him the way he played her.
Sometimes you shouldn't recover all your money back. You need to learn from that situation. But I'm glad she got some money back to help her with her heart.
She invested 200K with him, but now he cannot buy a house, get a car or even get a decent job because of what he did to her. He gave her material to write a book that he cannot capitalize on because of what he did. He may have gotten by with taking the 200K, but he did not get away with it.
Thats what she's telling us. But I don't think any of that happened. The truth is: she got scammed out of 200K, that man is long gone and now she's writing a book to recoup some of that money. All that FBI, judgement court shit sounds like all lies to me.
@@gamerincorporated154 I do believe she thought it was an investment. That is what she did for a living. It was an opportunity to make money with a man she loved and unfortunately she was duped by him. The problem is just as she would do her due diligence with a client, she failed to do the same thing with him. Had he been properly vetted, there would be no story to tell. The moment his butt was in front of a lawyer signing contracts and both having to deposit funds into a holding account, this jig would’ve been up.
Donna Marie Hayes thank you for being a light in the world! Some of what I relearned... 1. Nothing in cash without a receipt (to anyone). 2. Be physically present in all major transactions. 3. Grieve. Then get up and fight! Thank you Tamron Hall for giving her the space to speak.
Of course not. He was a grifter,scammer,...he played the long game. I know people like this. Sadly,I think hiring a PI is a good thing, before dating . imo.
So stupid … if it’s legit a bank will take it never give it to someone to do w as they want U pay straight to the builders etc not a individual person not even as a realtor they don’t ask for check in their name that I seen
She is strong and beautiful inside and out, sad to see these dusty romance scams. Maybe turning this into a movie would help other women. Congratulations on the book!
She got 20k out of her 200k back 🤦🏾♀️ Ladies please do not ignore your gut instincts, you know that feeling in your belly when something ain't right, it's there to protect you.
A “boyfriend” can’t get 200 pennies from me! I’m sure there were many flags; pink, purple, red she likely ignored! But happy she was able to recover some money.
Y’all judging her and some of you gave your body, time and attention that’s priceless to some idiot that was not worth it. She lost money, which can be replaced.you can’t get back priceless things. She made a mistake owned it and moved on., what you doing judging and being bitter…
Truth. It would be more gracious to admit this and offer compassion but also ensure others are warned and helped to learn from it. Many of these instances men leave children in the trail of it all too and go on to do more damage.
This happened to another women and she ended up having a nervous breakdown especially after she found out he brought the house for another women with her money.
Yes. Acquaintances of mine were duped by husbands & wives who had ulterior motives from the beginning of the relationships. They played the long game before their true selves were revealed. They were after everything from citizenship to financial stability for their true loves (other men & women). People will go to amazing lengths to accomplish their goals.
I NEVER do/give anything tangible to a man, especially if we are just dating. I wouldn't give a greeting card or even a pair of socks. He can leave if he wants to. No matter how good a woman is, he is still very likely to break her heart. He can break my heart ,but not my heart and my money. Unfortunately, this lady was swindled so badly. Thank God 🙏🏿, she is a winner.
I just finished your book. I really enjoyed your story and the way you take the reader on a journey through your life and the challenges you faced in childhood that played out in your adult relationships. Your willingness to share your story has helped many people.
He had absolutely nothing of value that warranted a blink let alone her precious time, energy and money. You will only find heartbreak online. Learn from other folks mistakes
What a lovely woman! I’m so happy she won her case against the loser and that she found love again. I’m also glad she got some of her money but 20k is a mere fraction of what he owes her.
Just pre-ordered your book on Audibles. I’m looking forward to listening to your story. Blessings and healing to you. Thank you for sharing your story 💕
Tamron, thanks so much for this episode, women really need to look at all the red flags, I'm glad she was able to get some $$ back from this low life, much success to her!
Victims must fight back! Thank you Donna for telling your story. Lots of people get taken by cons using love & other crap all over the world. It can be a scary world out there
Thank you for your transparency. Sometimes it's so embarrassing to admit when you've been "had". Yet, our testimonies are invaluable in helping others avoid pitfalls. May we all boldly tell our stories.🙏🏾 What better way to stop the enemies in their tracks!
Married for forty years, went through everything with this man, and then he walked out and took all of our 300,000 savings giving some of it to his girlfriend that he was cheating with, and spending the rest. I'm left with nothing. Devastating!!! So... I understand your pain. I'm so sorry.
$200k🤪 girl I’m not going to give $2.00 if I don’t know you that well. 18 months girlfriend there should’ve been red flags. Asking me for $200k oh baby you are to trusting.
@@Only1QueenOfEverything- Her daughter was an investigator and warned her that he had been to prison in the 90s. She took that information and chose to give him a chance because it was a long time ago.
Never ever give a person money or live with someone that you haven't been married to. And if you do make sure they have a strong history of ALWAYS paying you back. Background check everyone before the first date! Also make sure you are having important conversations about faith, family, finance, and fitness before the first date.
I'm a little puzzled at some of the comments. seems like people are stuck on the guy being a bf as if a husband or ANYONE cant scam. The lessons should be less about checking titles and more about written agreements and steps one can take to legally protect themselves if handling money with any person. Scammers will scam. The title they're holding and what they "are" to you doesnt matter
They mean nothing. You can scrub your background. You can be anyone you want. New social security number and all. If lgbtq can change their birth certificate. You have to get a forescenics investigator. Hire a company that go back 99 years. Most background checks don’t do that
I’m not blaming the victim all I’m saying is women need to stop this falling in love business and trusting so easily. She is a grown woman to only have 18 months with no marriage no nothing but him in her home playing house. It’s disturbing how gullible, desperate for companionship and intimacy women can be and sometimes men can’t see the red flag in relationships. Because there are always red flags. I’m lucky enough to have learned this in my late teens early 20’s so now I’m like a hound dog. Intuition is what I listen to. And if I ever marry or have a life partner I’m not investing my money with them on an idea they have because for me I need that to be separate for peace.
well said; some think (and pride themselves not so secretly) on that 'it could never happen to them' belief but then some other kind of scam can catch them off their guard@@sandrajackson5163 ... or some are ignorantly in bliss-land as their prized husband runs around behind their backs doing what they think could never be. For those living in loneliness I have compassion and understanding that "To the hungry soul, every bitter thing is sweet". So don't be so harsh in judging her.
How accurate you are. Something is probably off if it feels that way. I had a constant sense that something wasn't right, even though I was on the verge of being conned. You cannot get your money back with the assistance of the Police. Thank heavens, Jesus showed up to save my foolish rear and does what he does. Lord, You are loved!
This is so unfortunate. He sent his representative for as long as it took to scam her. I do believe that $200K is too much money to put in the hands of someone that you have known less than 2 years. I was married to my ex for 11 years and I wouldn't have trusted him with $200K.
NEVER purchase a home with someone you are dating, man or woman. SMH And stop lending men money. A real man wouldn’t even ask you. If he has to borrow money from you (to include moving in with you, paying for dinner, any exchange of money) he doesn’t have any. SMH Some women are slow and desperate, and just need to admit that to themselves.
Sorry you had to experience fake love & intentions. Appreciate you sharing awareness & your story! Pleased to hear that you found your True Love..Many Blessings & Success to you Both!!
I was scammed/groomed by my ex husband who was an immigrant. I met , married and had two sons. His family supported his actions . He planned this entire situation BUT I survived and thriving. It is awesome ❤news that Donna prevailed ❤❤❤. God is so good ❤❤❤❤ Best of luck
It happened to me, I helped a man buy a car. He was charming & sought my sympathy. I'm embarrassed & feel stupid, but I'm proud of myself for relalizing quickly that he was a con artist. He attempted to get money from me by using his son & I immediately called him out on it. He denied it, but my eyes were opened after that. I couldn't believe a person would go that low! Value yourselves & slow down! This works on ppl who are lonely & really want to find someone. Question everything & look for inconsistencies.
I dont care what anyone says husband or not discernment is such a necessity in todays day and age. People aren't always who they seem to be they will lie lie lie to get what they want such vile souls
I will never share what I have with anybody. My husband and I have been married 26 years. We are getting older. He's 12 years older than me. He always tells me if he's not around make sure the guy can be helpful to you, can he fix anything. Never show my hand! Don't be telling people what you have. And he will have his own place. As a matter of fact he will never come to my house. Nada!
*May God continue to bless and keep you, Donna!!! I celebrate your resilience, bravery, and honesty in sharing what happened so that others can learn through your expensive mistake.*
I’m So Sorry she was So Trusting and Wanted Love So much she was So Blinded!!…. That Criminal will get his Karma!! I pray that she put GOD 1st and Pray that he will send her the right one for her !🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
No matter how many times we hear these stories, women still lead with their hearts. Trust not in man but in the Lord. He will guide your heart and soul. Wishing you much love with your new relationship.
Only 18 months of DATING and you gave him 200k CASH????? First of all... wait, y'all know what? WISDOM told me not to state what I'm thinking right now!! WHEW CHILE!! Sadly, I know someone who gave her "man" 40k to replace stolen equipment from his tree cutting business. He replaced the equipment, but there's no way he would've gotten my money!! They've been together for about 5 years- NOT MARRIED and SHE'S dished out almost that same amount on exotic trips for them. Just a damn FOOL!! Meanwhile, he has ANOTHER woman in ANOTHER state, who he's been seeing for about 6-7 years, who he spends HIS money on. Now, do these ladies know about each other? They certainly do, but DON'T SEEM TO CARE!! It's almost like it's a competition for his attention/ affection and he just spews lie after lie to appease them both. I CANNOT MAKE THIS UP!! Finally, these people are GOOD AND GROWN too! He'll be 55 in late February, the "Sugar Mama" will be 58 in a few days, and Ms. Another State just turned 51 last month. SMDH...🙄🙄😡😡
@thisishowhedidit Girrrrrl, I love you for your comment (lol). YOU, my friend, are the type of friend that EVERY woman needs. Love your wisdom and directness. Blessings.
@@girlygirl1890 Awww, thank you Love! I would want the same for myself. It might hurt, but a GOOD GIRLFRIEND will tell you the truth!! We women have to stick together and look out for each other! 💝🙏🏽💝🙏🏽
Ok one thing for sure 200,00 is nothing to just give to a boyfriend let alone a husband. You learned your lesson the hard way. You will be fine TRUST you will. 🙏🏾
First of all… if a man starts asking you for money run! And why would you make such a huge investment with a man you e only known for 18 months? If your not legally married don’t do things like this with people and if you do, get the shit in writing! I learned a long time ago not give people money, usually you’ll never get it back!
😂 True. That's why I don't do "loans". When I give people money it's with the understanding that it's a gift and I have no expectation of getting it back. I give what I feel comfortable giving and let it go at that. No sob😢 stories will make me give any more or less.
A husband can do this too. I know plenty women married man that stole their money. Don’t ever put your financial in someone else’s hands. Because you know what you do and are. But you don’t know what the other person truly intentions are nowadays
Ladies do NOT give money to people for a house unless you’re sitting at a table with a realtor and title agent, signing documents to deed property in your name.
Agreed. Women need to Stop 🛑, telling others about our wealth we have worked so hard for. 😊😊😊.
EXACTLY!!
I notice many such men make sure they ask and enquire about these things EARLY in the relationship; even had them ask 'is this your own home?' on first visits or dates. They have a mission and agenda and it's all about themselves@@saritamoorebansa4485
That’s exactly what I was thinking🤷♀️
Just bought a house six months ago with the realtor, title agent, and even my banker present at the signing. I can only imagine this level of pain as it makes me distrusting of others (especially men) when it comes to money. So sorry that this level of theft and deceit happens to anyone and I hope that these losers pay dearly for the havoc they reek in other people's lives.
Scammers are everywhere. My own husband scammed me and took so much from me. Watch out for people truly.
I have a ZERO policy when it comes to giving a man money.
I give absolutely nothing, EVER.
My mother told me never to cash anyone's checks, and I don't.
💯
*EVERRRRRRRRRRR!* 💯
You’re very SMART AND INTELLIGENT. I handle all our money bec my husband
said from the start, he don’t like saving money or paying his bills on time. Oh
hell no, I’ve always paid my bills 2 weeks ahead of time and I saving 20% of my
paycheck. In 5yrs he understood why, he could actually buy our vacation home
without me, he left out that bank like he won money. After than he start saving
money from his business he had.
I’m a man and I agree with you.
DO NOT GIVE that kind of CASH MONEY TO ANYONE
🎯💯🤜🏾🤛🏾
Never...ever
I just don’t understand how people can be so gullible for love- it’s really puzzling to me 🤷🏽♀️ red flags was all over this. This is not meant to be demeaning. I’m wouldn’t give that money to anyone. It would’ve went from my hands to the bank that was supposed to be closing on the house
period
@@melissashomeandlifestyle1462 right!
Newsflash....a husband can also do the same thing. I was married to a gold digger who got away with $50,000. Wolves come in many different forms.
EXACTLY. I don't know why everyone keeps harping on the fact they're not married. A close friend of mine had this happen to her & her mom by the Pastor and Church they attended. It was a complete scam. Other people played a part in the scam ...there was fake paperwork drawn up and Everything. Stop Victim Shaming. This is Wrong no matter the circumstances. He Stole her Money. SO SAD😢
BIG IPS TO YOU SIS FOR SHARING YOUR STORY. Don't be ashamed. Much love to you and your new guy.
❤❤❤
People will never learn, that's why scamming is a yearly multi-billion dollar industry.
As I type this, thousands of women (and men) are handing over their savings to scammers, despite all the victims they see, like this lady, and the many warnings.
Scamming also involves celebrities, and others, who are newly slim from taking the latest popular weight-loss drugs and have now begun peddling expensive weight-loss scams on the Internet, or have had cosmetic surgery on their face and is promoting expensive anti-aging skin-care programs online.
Never give money to a man. That’s what anthers teach their daughters.
Whew chile 😂😂
I went through a similar situation with my ex-husband. He turned out to be a fraud but up until I connected the dots he was good to me, a partner, best friend, soul mate. When I confronted him he took off without a word and took all funds within 45 minutes. I never heard one thing from him or about him until his daughter contacted me when he had a massive stroke resulting in death. I never allowed myself to mourn the dissolve of our marriage nor any of the pain he caused me and kept moving forward working hard. I have officially been through abuse, adultery and now abandonment. I mourned it all at one time once he passed away. It was horrible but I made it through.
I'm so sorry you went through this. That was ultimate betrayal.
Praise God you made it through! Now your book?❤
I don't know you but I am happy as a woman to see you are trying to heal, may God continue to give you the strength you need to get pass this part in your journey call life.
Did he really pass away?
@@laurenxo6503 ikr! He could be laid up somewhere avoiding charges.
Whew. Sorry you got robbed. A boyfriend is not a husband. If he didn't have $200k to match, don't put your money into nothing with a guy.
Husband’s have been known to be users also! We just have to be more careful
Chile!!!!!
The moral of the story is make sure your husband can afford a home. Don’t ever in life try to play house with a soul , I don’t even send my husband of 20 years any cash.
@@Tha-GoddessNot a real husband smh and there would be signs when a woman has discernment.
Watch out for husband's to basically you need to be right there with whom you buying with not absent . Smh do your own thing .
Let me just say, she is clearly a caring, good person. Karma is real and he will not enjoy that money for long. Don’t mess with good people.
#LAW
Yes he will
Agreed! And she have found her another man. That I assume treats her a lot better.
@@natouly22Yes he will what?
She probably is not the only female he has scammed.
9:34 "I have one life to live, I cannot allow him to steal it." Amen.
The moral of this story is Not to buy a house with someone you're dating. Come on. Put a sign on the door of your heart that says 'Demonstrated commitment is required. " No marriage license no monetary investment.
Absolutely! Well spoken!👊🏾
I love that statement. I shall live by it myself.
Well you know people get married buy a house and then the husbands kills the wife and sometimes kids so no guarantees about what a relationship status guarantees
FACTS, she needed to pray for the Lord to take the gullible trait away from her and move in silence, the brother wouldn't of ever known she even had those resources if she'd kept it to herself until the I Do was completed
Even if you are dating, don’t buy a house unless your name is on it. If your credit is bad wait until you get it straightened out.
This story is filled with lessons...
I'm grateful that she was able to recoup some of her money and find love again but in this interview she never said what lesson she learned from this experience.
From what I can hear the main lesson was " don't treat a boyfriend like your Husband "
A boyfriend does not deserve to lie in bed next to you for 18 months.
A boyfriend does not deserve large sums of your money for anything.
Men typically don't respect women who give them full access to their body and their money just for "showing up "
Chile, you said that, Amen!
You preached a word. Thank you. You're like me. I listen for "what did you learn" messages. When I don't hear them say that or push to say that, I know they haven't learned anything. The issue will just show up again in another form and with another face.
That’s a sermon ! Speak!
Old-school Mamas used to school their daughters on not giving wife privileges to boyfriends. Common sense is so uncommon nowadays!
She did say be mindful and if something feels off than it is. Sometimes that is enough. I don’t know why someone of us need a whole building to fall on us to get the picture!!
I'm glad she didn't stop fighting after the police said they couldn't help her and that she's getting some of her money back. The story is a bit confusing to me, however. Why give the scammer boyfriend her money for a house anyway? She could have purchased whatever she wanted on her own. As far as I'm concerned, a woman should run as soon as a man she's not married to starts asking anything about her money!
🎯💯🤜🏾🤛🏾
Well she said that she was on crutches or something. She couldn’t walk.
But _to me, she or any other woman shouldn’t give a man any amount of money!_
It sounds like he was renovating the house and didn't he just took the money and tried to get away with it.
Yep. I had a bf from when I lived in the Caribbean. We continued the relationship when I migrated. He wanted my pin # and ATM card from back home, I did not give it to him. Then he kept telling me about investments I could do back home, I told him that I was not interested. I want my investments to be where I live. He was upset about it and that told me all I needed to know about him. I can gladly say that he got none of my money.
Run. Do not pass go. Do not collect.
There are a lot of scammers out here .. and they are often targeting women of color .. we all want to be loved .. I hope she gets her money back
These devils play the long game. Anyone can get duped. This is awful. I was angry for her.
Exactly, it's a job, and he made 200k for 18 months of acting.
@@zxcccccc1right! So sad.
18 months is not really a long game to give someone $200k.
@@SweetEssie
Stranger danger ⚠️
“Never give money to a man.” That’s what a father teaches you through words and practice.
Guilty but it was $300 damn
Shiiit my momma taught me that!!
Not a father anyone with a mom and also common sense
It’s hurtful to be fooled by someone you have cared for in a relationship . 😢 I pray 🙏🏾 that God strengthens and protects your heart ❤️.😊
Im sorry this happened to her.. Women need to be careful, smarter. Stay single until you know he is send from God.
AMEN AMEN AMEN 🙌🏽❤️💪🏽💯‼️
Yes, amen!
🙄…I’m sure she thought he was sent by God. People who speak/think this way live in fantasy.
amen
God may never send you a man and that's OK too. Peace is priceless!
I love her courage, hopefully her story will prevent other women from experiencing a situation like this.
Never buy a home with someone who isn't your spouse. And if you do, handle it with the assistance of an attorney. Problem solved. She made a foolish decision to begin with. Hope she recovers all of her money and "Javier" ends up messing with someone who plays him the way he played her.
Sometimes you shouldn't recover all your money back. You need to learn from that situation. But I'm glad she got some money back to help her with her heart.
Absolutely the truth!!! And even with a spouse...do it legally.
she got played for a fool.
Not buying one if married neither.
Spouse can con you too.
She invested 200K with him, but now he cannot buy a house, get a car or even get a decent job because of what he did to her. He gave her material to write a book that he cannot capitalize on because of what he did. He may have gotten by with taking the 200K, but he did not get away with it.
Thats what she's telling us. But I don't think any of that happened. The truth is: she got scammed out of 200K, that man is long gone and now she's writing a book to recoup some of that money. All that FBI, judgement court shit sounds like all lies to me.
@@gamerincorporated154 I do believe she thought it was an investment. That is what she did for a living. It was an opportunity to make money with a man she loved and unfortunately she was duped by him. The problem is just as she would do her due diligence with a client, she failed to do the same thing with him. Had he been properly vetted, there would be no story to tell. The moment his butt was in front of a lawyer signing contracts and both having to deposit funds into a holding account, this jig would’ve been up.
200k isn’t enough for a house LOL he will lose it he won’t be able keep up w payments etc
Donna Marie Hayes thank you for being a light in the world! Some of what I relearned...
1. Nothing in cash without a receipt (to anyone).
2. Be physically present in all major transactions.
3. Grieve. Then get up and fight!
Thank you Tamron Hall for giving her the space to speak.
You give your 200k TO A BANK . Not an individual. Did you even make him sign a promissory note?
Was there a receipt?
Of course not. He was a grifter,scammer,...he played the long game. I know people like this. Sadly,I think hiring a PI is a good thing, before dating . imo.
Where was his half of the money 💰 🤷♀️
So stupid … if it’s legit a bank will take it never give it to someone to do w as they want U pay straight to the builders etc not a individual person not even as a realtor they don’t ask for check in their name that I seen
She is strong and beautiful inside and out, sad to see these dusty romance scams. Maybe turning this into a movie would help other women. Congratulations on the book!
Nothing surprises me ANYMORE ! Happy you did not let him steal your joy ! ❤❤
She got 20k out of her 200k back 🤦🏾♀️
Ladies please do not ignore your gut instincts, you know that feeling in your belly when something ain't right, it's there to protect you.
A “boyfriend” can’t get 200 pennies from me! I’m sure there were many flags; pink, purple, red she likely ignored! But happy she was able to recover some money.
Can't get 2 pennies from me.
Not even a sandwich 😭😭😭😭
exactly.....I'm giving a strong side eye for $20😂😂😂
18 months and 200k? SHEEEEIIIIITTT
😂I know that's right lol
@@HollyGolightly74all it took was $11.88 for me 😅
Boyfriend!!! why would you give someone money to buy your house
very true
And not even getting involved in the process of it is crazy to me
Why couldn't she do it herself? I'm confused. Her story doesn't even seem real. Maybe she's trying to sell a story
Don't say what y'all wouldn't do. If prince charming is treating and fck'n you right you'd be so love drunk 😢 that you wouldn't see it coming either.
@@SweetEssieYUP 🤔
People have no problem stealing from others... remember this. NEVER give anyone money you CAN NOT afford to lose. Trust but verify!!
I bet she wouldn’t help a great girlfriend like that. Sometimes we put our trust in the wrong individuals.
Yep. 🍆
So true!
Love blinds.
Y’all judging her and some of you gave your body, time and attention that’s priceless to some idiot that was not worth it. She lost money, which can be replaced.you can’t get back priceless things. She made a mistake owned it and moved on., what you doing judging and being bitter…
Thanks for this amazing message! We all have been through unfortunate circumstances in life, if You haven't please keep living!
Truth. It would be more gracious to admit this and offer compassion but also ensure others are warned and helped to learn from it. Many of these instances men leave children in the trail of it all too and go on to do more damage.
Lord thank God u went thew what u learn aman sister u got something back an he still ask n u for monies now u got a nice love n disen man that love u🎉
This happened to another women and she ended up having a nervous breakdown especially after she found out he brought the house for another women with her money.
I’ve heard it all before🎼🎤🎶; it happens all the time.
*Woman
Yes. Acquaintances of mine were duped by husbands & wives who had ulterior motives from the beginning of the relationships. They played the long game before their true selves were revealed. They were after everything from citizenship to financial stability for their true loves (other men & women). People will go to amazing lengths to accomplish their goals.
Shirley Strawberry's husband??
No matter how lonely i get, I WONT LOOK FOR LOVE on any dating site
Very wise choice! Same with me!
Before dating apps, there were in-person scams
Using discernment on the face to face meetings is vital. If it’s not feeling right it will show up.
Same here
I've tried dating sites
Ninety percent of them are predatorial narcissist.
Yep never doing that..... 18months isn't long enough to give anyone no 200K and not married...
Man 10 years ain’t long enough.
I NEVER do/give anything tangible to a man, especially if we are just dating. I wouldn't give a greeting card or even a pair of socks. He can leave if he wants to. No matter how good a woman is, he is still very likely to break her heart. He can break my heart ,but not my heart and my money. Unfortunately, this lady was swindled so badly. Thank God 🙏🏿, she is a winner.
I just finished your book. I really enjoyed your story and the way you take the reader on a journey through your life and the challenges you faced in childhood that played out in your adult relationships. Your willingness to share your story has helped many people.
She’s very strong. I would have lost my mind 😂
And am so glad she found love again
Get your bag gurl and be happy with your new relationship what a blessing and great end to a bad situation
NEW RELATIONSHIP.
SHE IS DESPERATE!
SOME WOMEN CAN'T LIVE BY THEMSELVES IN PEACE😢
SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY!
Right!!
How da hell she find a man that damn quick??!!
He had absolutely nothing of value that warranted a blink let alone her precious time, energy and money. You will only find heartbreak online. Learn from other folks mistakes
How do you give a stranger $200.000 (18 months of knowing someone)? Come on, sisters.
Shes is a BRIGHT LIGHT.
She got the lesson from the experience
What a lovely woman! I’m so happy she won her case against the loser and that she found love again. I’m also glad she got some of her money but 20k is a mere fraction of what he owes her.
Life happens to us all. Scammers are everywhere. People plit against you all time. She is not a victim. She is the Victor😂❤
Just pre-ordered your book on Audibles. I’m looking forward to listening to your story. Blessings and healing to you. Thank you for sharing your story 💕
Looks like a good read for sure
Oh yea.. I wanna read it
Tamron, thanks so much for this episode, women really need to look at all the red flags, I'm glad she was able to get some $$ back from this low life, much success to her!
He knows how to romanticize women a majestic way. Women keep your guards up
Victims must fight back! Thank you Donna for telling your story. Lots of people get taken by cons using love & other crap all over the world. It can be a scary world out there
Thank you for your transparency. Sometimes it's so embarrassing to admit when you've been "had". Yet, our testimonies are invaluable in helping others avoid pitfalls. May we all boldly tell our stories.🙏🏾 What better way to stop the enemies in their tracks!
Married for forty years, went through everything with this man, and then he walked out and took all of our 300,000 savings giving some of it to his girlfriend that he was cheating with, and spending the rest. I'm left with nothing. Devastating!!! So... I understand your pain. I'm so sorry.
Sorry that happened to you. 🙏🏾
I am so sorry
$200k🤪 girl I’m not going to give $2.00 if I don’t know you that well. 18 months girlfriend there should’ve been red flags. Asking me for $200k oh baby you are to trusting.
I’m not giving a Hyphen!!
💯💯💯 ….he was probably displaying con artist, scammer behavior at, “hello, can I get your number, take you out, etc?!”
There's NO way in 🤬
I would've told him to go to the Bank and apply for a Home Loan in his name ONLY!
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
@@Only1QueenOfEverything- Her daughter was an investigator and warned her that he had been to prison in the 90s. She took that information and chose to give him a chance because it was a long time ago.
Buying a house with a boyfriend is wild. Not something you should ever do.
I’m glad she fought back! I hope many people will learn from her experience. 💜🦋
Don’t ask me for SH*T. That’s *always* a red flag 🚩. I will take off and run. 🏃🏾
😂🤣😂 I know that’s right.
This!! It’s so cringe!! I get utterly disgusted!!! 🤮 😖
Thank God she won her judgement 🙏🏾🙏🏾#Decernment
At this older age, she couldn’t see she was being played. She ignored all his red flags or repainted the flags purple.
Painted them rose colored.
This happen recently or something in past and she wrote about it.
Thank u! Im sorey but i have no patience with this nonsense.
As old as she is, she wasnt suspicious????
Unfortunately people don't want to just accept their circumstances....
I dunno. It seems like a lie to me. She seems like the person that would double-check everything. Maybe it's just a story to sell a book
Love these stories of women coming forward and telling their story. Ladies keep your eyes open, check and then check again ‼️
She found love. ❤What a beautiful out come. STRENGTH!❤
Red flag. When your man ask you for money...time to say bye, bye!!
Never ever give a person money or live with someone that you haven't been married to. And if you do make sure they have a strong history of ALWAYS paying you back. Background check everyone before the first date! Also make sure you are having important conversations about faith, family, finance, and fitness before the first date.
I'm a little puzzled at some of the comments. seems like people are stuck on the guy being a bf as if a husband or ANYONE cant scam. The lessons should be less about checking titles and more about written agreements and steps one can take to legally protect themselves if handling money with any person. Scammers will scam. The title they're holding and what they "are" to you doesnt matter
I’m so sorry that this happened to her but as someone who pulls away when I’m going through something I wouldn’t find it unusual
I don't know if you're a woman...but men lean on the women they love during tough times like that...if he gets distant it because he doesn't love you.
Background checks are a must!!!!!
They mean nothing. You can scrub your background. You can be anyone you want. New social security number and all. If lgbtq can change their birth certificate. You have to get a forescenics investigator. Hire a company that go back 99 years. Most background checks don’t do that
Dont believe in live in boyfriends!!
Yup, the shack up. 🏠
I’m not blaming the victim all I’m saying is women need to stop this falling in love business and trusting so easily. She is a grown woman to only have 18 months with no marriage no nothing but him in her home playing house. It’s disturbing how gullible, desperate for companionship and intimacy women can be and sometimes men can’t see the red flag in relationships. Because there are always red flags. I’m lucky enough to have learned this in my late teens early 20’s so now I’m like a hound dog. Intuition is what I listen to. And if I ever marry or have a life partner I’m not investing my money with them on an idea they have because for me I need that to be separate for peace.
You're right. However, it's not only money woman should be concerned about.
well said; some think (and pride themselves not so secretly) on that 'it could never happen to them' belief but then some other kind of scam can catch them off their guard@@sandrajackson5163 ... or some are ignorantly in bliss-land as their prized husband runs around behind their backs doing what they think could never be. For those living in loneliness I have compassion and understanding that "To the hungry soul, every bitter thing is sweet". So don't be so harsh in judging her.
How accurate you are. Something is probably off if it feels that way. I had a constant sense that something wasn't right, even though I was on the verge of being conned. You cannot get your money back with the assistance of the Police. Thank heavens, Jesus showed up to save my foolish rear and does what he does. Lord, You are loved!
She speaks beautifully.
That's an extremely hard pill to swallow...my mind is on him being a complete fraud and stranger 1ST rather than the money. This is extremely sad.
Thank you for sharing your story. You are more than a conqueror!!
This is so unfortunate. He sent his representative for as long as it took to scam her. I do believe that $200K is too much money to put in the hands of someone that you have known less than 2 years. I was married to my ex for 11 years and I wouldn't have trusted him with $200K.
NEVER purchase a home with someone you are dating, man or woman. SMH And stop lending men money. A real man wouldn’t even ask you. If he has to borrow money from you (to include moving in with you, paying for dinner, any exchange of money) he doesn’t have any. SMH Some women are slow and desperate, and just need to admit that to themselves.
Sorry you had to experience fake love & intentions.
Appreciate you sharing awareness & your story! Pleased to hear that you found your True Love..Many Blessings & Success to you Both!!
I was scammed/groomed by my ex husband who was an immigrant. I met , married and had two sons. His family supported his actions . He planned this entire situation BUT I survived and thriving. It is awesome ❤news that Donna prevailed ❤❤❤. God is so good ❤❤❤❤ Best of luck
It happened to me, I helped a man buy a car. He was charming & sought my sympathy. I'm embarrassed & feel stupid, but I'm proud of myself for relalizing quickly that he was a con artist. He attempted to get money from me by using his son & I immediately called him out on it. He denied it, but my eyes were opened after that. I couldn't believe a person would go that low! Value yourselves & slow down! This works on ppl who are lonely & really want to find someone. Question everything & look for inconsistencies.
When did we start giving money away without due diligence?
He must have been laying down some serious pipe.
@@uscitizen1035 I said the same thing! Giving it to her real good and she wasn’t thinking! She hadn’t seen the house!
@@bobbiking2123 or been inside the house, talk to the realtor nor the bank?
I dont care what anyone says husband or not discernment is such a necessity in todays day and age. People aren't always who they seem to be they will lie lie lie to get what they want such vile souls
Sometimes, people can get, so desperate. Love is blind😮
At every age..
Men and women
I will never share what I have with anybody. My husband and I have been married 26 years. We are getting older. He's 12 years older than me. He always tells me if he's not around make sure the guy can be helpful to you, can he fix anything. Never show my hand! Don't be telling people what you have. And he will have his own place. As a matter of fact he will never come to my house. Nada!
Always get it in writing period! She was too trusting!
18 months and you decide to get a house with him 😒😞😒
I downloaded the book so fast. ❤ thank you for sharing your story 🙏🏾🙏🏾
I’m not giving no man $2,000 . Let alone $200,000 insane !
Pls read my post
A boyfriend can’t get a dollar from me!
Never trust someone you just meet and trust them so fast
He needs to be locked up. Tamron feel like crying I'd feel like fighting.
Slow clap from audience when she introduced her second boyfriend. She should be careful.
Exactly!
Just got scammed by a man and found a new one already??!!
Did you even take some time for yourself??
Wonderful that she found love 💗
We have to be more protective of ourselves. Our bodies, our minds, our hearts, our money.
*May God continue to bless and keep you, Donna!!! I celebrate your resilience, bravery, and honesty in sharing what happened so that others can learn through your expensive mistake.*
I believe there were red flags before that happened... We tend not to pay attention...
Given $200k, She got back $20k... She need her $180k...
I’m So Sorry she was So Trusting and Wanted Love So much she was So Blinded!!…. That Criminal will get his Karma!! I pray that she put GOD 1st and Pray that he will send her the right one for her !🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
NOT WISE
He found someone that was easy prey
Yes he did find her easy prey. He took his time to reach his goal 🤷♀️
18 months to get 200k cash therrs no job in the world that will pay u that with out long education or if ur someone who’s not a regular person
Thank God she had the strength .
This was a great turnaround and story. Bravo.
18 months and you're buying a house but unmarried. At her age i would not want any man to disturb my peace.
No matter how many times we hear these stories, women still lead with their hearts. Trust not in man but in the Lord. He will guide your heart and soul. Wishing you much love with your new relationship.
Only 18 months of DATING and you gave him 200k CASH????? First of all... wait, y'all know what? WISDOM told me not to state what I'm thinking right now!! WHEW CHILE!!
Sadly, I know someone who gave her "man" 40k to replace stolen equipment from his tree cutting business. He replaced the equipment, but there's no way he would've gotten my money!! They've been together for about 5 years- NOT MARRIED and SHE'S dished out almost that same amount on exotic trips for them. Just a damn FOOL!! Meanwhile, he has ANOTHER woman in ANOTHER state, who he's been seeing for about 6-7 years, who he spends HIS money on. Now, do these ladies know about each other? They certainly do, but DON'T SEEM TO CARE!! It's almost like it's a competition for his attention/ affection and he just spews lie after lie to appease them both. I CANNOT MAKE THIS UP!! Finally, these people are GOOD AND GROWN too! He'll be 55 in late February, the "Sugar Mama" will be 58 in a few days, and Ms. Another State just turned 51 last month. SMDH...🙄🙄😡😡
@thisishowhedidit Girrrrrl, I love you for your comment (lol). YOU, my friend, are the type of friend that EVERY woman needs. Love your wisdom and directness. Blessings.
You got aaaallll the tea 😁
@@girlygirl1890 Awww, thank you Love! I would want the same for myself. It might hurt, but a GOOD GIRLFRIEND will tell you the truth!! We women have to stick together and look out for each other! 💝🙏🏽💝🙏🏽
@@MoiraPraline LIISSTENN!! I don’t even understand it!! 🙄🙄🙄🤯😁
Ok one thing for sure 200,00 is nothing to just give to a boyfriend let alone a husband. You learned your lesson the hard way. You will be fine TRUST you will. 🙏🏾
A kind lady,that was deceived by a Predator.She met her Prince,having survived a Frog.❤️
First of all… if a man starts asking you for money run! And why would you make such a huge investment with a man you e only known for 18 months? If your not legally married don’t do things like this with people and if you do, get the shit in writing!
I learned a long time ago not give people money, usually you’ll never get it back!
😂 True. That's why I don't do "loans". When I give people money it's with the understanding that it's a gift and I have no expectation of getting it back. I give what I feel comfortable giving and let it go at that. No sob😢 stories will make me give any more or less.
A husband can do this too. I know plenty women married man that stole their money. Don’t ever put your financial in someone else’s hands. Because you know what you do and are. But you don’t know what the other person truly intentions are nowadays