Have you noticed scars from cutting herself on her arms? It is a sign that she isn't emotionaly stable. Maybe that is why she experiences emotions with double intensity?
@@pietroroberto6114 One partner being more invested than the other is a universal human experience. It's a high pressure society, and you don't know how old those scars are, or she was abused or neglected. Don't judge so easily.
@@pietroroberto6114 wait... some girls did that too? I thought it was just my ex, shes pretty quiet about stuff and suddenly shes sayin that she did that to herself and blame me for that wtf....
Mecks089 yeah totally agree, she knows she’s picky and she knows it makes it harder for her to find a dat. But what’s wrong with it. And she looks kinda elegant, not ugly at all. There seem to be some guys feeling hurt in the commenting area.
All people have different taste to tell them that they have to lower their standars why should they? If they know what they want then that's good :) no one has the right to say that it is wrong because maby your own standars may seem as wierd for the other person too so just let people be themselves and live their lifes as they want :)
Wow. Men? It goes both ways. Nothing wrong with high expectation but don't expect your dream guy/girl to fall for you when you don't take care of yourself first. If you have high expectation, you also need to be prepared to stay single for long time or forever.
Ah, the lack of communication and expressing emotions is a big problem with Japanese guys in my experiences. When I studied abroad in Japan during high school for a couple of months, the boys were super kind and sweet but were too shy. They’d often do nice things for me but could barely talk to me or look me in the eye because they were that shy! The boys who were interested in me wouldn’t tell me directly, they’d tell our mutual friend and that mutual friend would tell me. Being shy towards someone you have a crush on is fine but their level of shyness went through the roof. One guy I was friends with, the only guy who actually told me himself that he had feelings for me, could barely look at me or even be near me once he realized he had feelings for me because he was just so shy. And when he did confess to me it was over LINE and two minutes before my flight on my last day in Japan! So yeah, they are superrrrrr shy, but they do the sweetest things to show they care and actions speak louder than words :)
Princess Lily Oh that's good I actually like guys who are really shy I think its really cute that they are shy but still show their affection towards you. There are rarely any guys like that in my state in america.
T. F. Haha yeah, it’s adorable and so endearing! But if you’re a foreigner it’s even worse because they’re even more shy, this is true for Asian foreigners as well. Honestly it’s partially my fault for my friend as I should’ve notice the hints he was dropping. The golden rule for a girl looking for a boyfriend in Japan is courage, because a lot of the time (based on my experiences) you’re going to be the one that has to make the first move. But it’s usually worth it ☺️
Princess Lily Thanks for the advice but unfortunately i wouldn't be going to Japan anytime soon since I'm still very young and i am from a second class family so i have to wait until i am older and have enough money but i am going to Korea first due to the fact i am learning the launguge and i will be a foreign exchange student then i am going to learn Japanese than go to Japan.
Personally, my issue was finding someone I was interested in. I'd have guys ask me out, but I didn't feel any connection to them. After college, I turned to online dating. After a month or two, I found someone I really liked. We talked, made it clear that open communication was important, and went from there. We just got married a month ago. I think being open and honest is most important, which gets rid of any "guessing games" couple have trouble with.
@@fernandacapetillo2371 Mayby try to revise your expectations? Sometimes people are aiming too high or even at unreal levels, while being a bit offerless themselves.
Hmm... when I first met my boyfriend in Japan I actually fell in love with him because he had a big heart and we had some deep heart to heart conversations. Maybe I’m not too picky. I guess I was rather taken aback since most people say Japanese men are shy and reserved and he’s very open with me and a big hugger and all that and sometimes uses the big word “Aishiteru” in a moment he truly feels it. I guess for me when I comes to love I just like to feel loved by the one I love I don’t really have any standards or expectations.
that’s p cute but saying aishiteru is kind of a weird thing to say in Japan 😂 usually you just say daisuki instead... (watched a vid about what not to say in Japan lmao, also half jp and have never heard it being used in my life) but you do you :) hope you still have a good relationship
Because you have another view of relationships, you the real true pure meaning of what a relationship is about, because for those asian girls & families for them the relationship is about what they HAVE not about who they’re are in the inside too. I’m happy for you 💖🙏🏻 where you from?
@@karlaruiz8685 better start learning then its not so hard you just have to follow instructions ... oh wait :P seriously though even if you do not do it for a man learn it for yourself being able to cook will be a great skill to have in your life . being able to cook something nice the way you like it will almost always be better than some take out and probably healthier
The one girl saying she feels like she had to buy new dresses or clothes for each date seems more like a problem she brought upon herself than it being the problem with the guy. Just wear what you got, girl. Lol.
Guys do like our girls to dress pretty, buuut... if a guy finds a girl to be attractive in an outfit once, he's not going to be upset if she wears the same outfit again... Now, if she only has the *one* outfit and isn't a starving student, that might get a little boring, but that's a little extreme, and most women like to change their appearance around. Face it, there wouldn't be so many dress shops and boutiques - and jewellers! - if gals didn't buy the pretties...
MrDboydeluxe nah, give few more years and she will be begging lmao. I give her one thing. Honesty. Whoever decides to date her, at least won’t feel cheated. Now will she be honest with the guy like she was on this interview?
I agreed about constant texting...until she called "good morning" messages useless. Texting too much takes away some things they can talk about in actual conversation... but. I find saying good morning and good night cute and considerate!
For me she the most genuine girl. Being considerate is important in a relation but from the moment it's becomes mandatory it's just meaningless You can better do something that's is really meaningful once a week instead of falling for the new(old) fake culture.
Sadly my latest ex girlfriend was like that... She wouldn't do anything unless it was planned out weeks or months in advance... Assuming she remembered.
KOTheWorld I see it as either being insecure or just really wanting to see her again. That, and planning ahead allows both parties to reserve that time for each other in otherwise busy lives.
Now that ive watched the boy's version i got a little confuse... The boys say that its a pain to plan dates... And the girls literally said that boys are too dependent on the girls tht thy hve to plan dates, earn money ect... Im pretty sure whts missing in their relationship is real communication
Hawa Najwa Abdullah how can you truly communicate if you’re always concerned about what the other person thinks? So you end up filtering what you really want to say (lying), and the relationship is built on BS. This is how things are in Japan. They’re not accustomed to real communication. You ever notice that the girls will usually answer something along the same line as her friends? She doesn’t want to be different from the collective.
Yeah that girl who said the make up for men trend is coming from Korea isn't lying at all. Saw the Korean goalkeeper in the world cup wearing some bb cream or concealer! Really surprised me.
@HandsOffStalker pesonally i don't think anybody (boys and girls alike) should be obliged to do makeup.Makeup is solely a personal choice and shouldn't be perceived as a requirement of some sorts.
to everyone dissing the picky lady, some people prefer to be alone than in poor company/with men they have 0 feelings for. giving in to pressure from others is a sure way to be unhappy for the rest of your life. Picky Lady, your time will come :) x
Yeah But I personally think that feelings and love cannot be connected to material things like money... So she doesn't even seem to know real love...she just wants the perfect man for selfish reasons.
Reading the comments on the first interviewee, reminds me of a friend I have who actually put her standards high, after she got heartbroken & had give her all when the guy treated her like trash. So I do understand when girls/guys put their standard high, esp if they're dating to marry & not just date.
Strange, because the guy she described is precisely the type of guy who treats girls like trash. Those characteristics in no way garuantees she will be treated right, simply because she did not mention anything about personality or proper actions.
But...if that's the reason, the standards should be about personality. Idk about you, but I think traits like humility, generosity, and patience should be on a woman's list if she makes one to protect herself.
Mike The Gamer my man you are assuming that every hobby is like yours, which I assume is gaming. If they’re into for example cars or computers, what she gonna do? 😂 buy him a new set of wheels? A graphics card?? Not only are those extremely expensive but without asking him directly she will have no idea what to get him. Girls are so much easier to shop for. Sincerely, someone with an engineer boyfriend and car hobbyist brother 😂 been struggling for years.
The_Lomax no one said there was anything problematic about asking? But then no gift will ever be a surprise. However my point is about expensive hobbies so... been with my boyfriend 8 years and the communication really couldn’t get any better.
Since I live in Japan for now some time and am in a relationship w/ a Japanese guy, I thought I’d give my opinion on dating a Japanese boy/ what startled me. 1- Japanese boys ( I’m in high school so I’m talking about high school love) won’t talk to you that much in high school. They’ll talk to you even less after getting into the relationship. 2- In public they won’t do skinship or very few (the ones who hold hands are very very rare, as a lot of high school don’t allow relationships). 3- Japanese boys are « fragiles » like you have to lead them most of the time. You have to send the first message, you have to chase them if you want them as they’re too shy/ self concious about making some moves 4- Relationships are a way to have fun. So most Japanese guys place their gf under their friends and they see it as something to have a good time; as a club or something. So they won’t be that much with you/ won’t reply to text in seconds... 5- Japanese boys won’t necessarily tell their friends when they are dating you, don’t take it personally, they just want to escape awkward moments with their friends (japanese boys don’t talk that much about girls) 6- Japanese boys don’t necessarily like opening about their problems. That doesn’t mean they don’t like you, they just want to not be needy/complainant. 7- they see on the very long term (my japanese boyfriend told me that he had very « short » relationships and then I found out that his « shortest » relationship was a 2 year long one) 8- they’re clueless about girls & the « fish » thing is true so you’ll end up having the feeling of being in a relationship with urself. LAST THING: THIS IS NOT TRUE FOR EVERYONE. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT. I HAD REALLY PASSIONATE PARTNERS AND EXPERIENCED RLLY PASSIONATE LOVE THERE TOO (it was with a haafu but still, he was pretty Japanese). But yeah that’s some things I often found in Japanese boys’ personalities.
スイレン tell him clearly what you think. That you are not ok with him ignoring you, and if he has some problems that make him not reply to you, that he needs to share it so that u’ll understand 100% of what’s happening
Japanese people are usually shy but more than that, they respect others and put others’ feelings before theirs , so I guess they become way too self conscious and end up saying nothing.
Wow, people went absolutely savage at the lady as if they're personally targeted. The world must be so cruel for their fragile ego lol. She's gorgeous and has a good understanding of what type of relationship she's looking for, OBVIOUSLY she's gonna be picky. What do people expect? I really respect her for not giving in to nasty comments she's bound to hear a lot and keeping her principles.
height, race, wearing makeup, none is a problem for me. as long as he person is kind, with an open mind and we get along well, and I find them attractive enough as well (though that’s a bonus even though we get attracted by looks first, right? but personality is what conquers) I don’t even care. also like one of the girls said: possessive or too clingy people are a pain to me. I like to be with my partner when I have one, but I also like to sometimes be alone or hang out with friends. I agree with the last two girls
MIA Iruha yes, just dealt with tons of people and their characters so far. so, my opinion broadened a bit on this. when you’re young and inexperienced you tend to idolize too much
Its a respectable attitude if you give the same curtesy to your partner. If you can be alone and have time with your friends then the same must be true to your partner, otherwise you became a suffocating glue which most guy finds annoying.
Ikr i just want someone i get along well to stay with me till we died, race and gender are never an issue, looks kinda do sometimes but if i like your personality than it doesn't matter that much.
It's a cultural problem. I'm a chinese and i totally undertand that...in the western world kids are teach and encourage very young to explain them self and parents encorage them to get more confident. All my westerner school friends has boyfriend or girlfriend as young as 12 -14 years old. Parents are interessed by their relationship and guide them trough it...my friend mom told be that relationship is the most difficult thing in the world and you can't learn it at school. So parents are not against early age relation. Their let their kids explore , gain experience and maturity. Asian people are far behind. How can you expect young adult to act un a certai way they never done before.
I completely agree! I'm from the Netherlands and lived in China for the past year, I feel like parents in most Asian cultures are overly protective to their children. In my country if kids are playing outside in a slightly dangerous situation the parents don't take action, when the kid then gets hurt it's a valuable life experience and he/she won't make the same mistake. This is how children get taught to be more independent whereas most Asians I know are shielded from experiences like danger or love. As soon as the kids grow up and need to be independent, eg when they go to university, they don't have their parents to guide them around which might result in insecurity.
@Ronnie ooh haha, my previous comment was already from more than a year ago so I wasn't in china during covid19. According to my friends there it was a very strict tho.
I don't think it be a cultural problem this is a really perfect point of your cultura,may because you raised up by this culture you cant realize how priceless it is . being in a relationship from 12 or 14 is not really good thing , let me explain, imagine you are are 14 now and in a relationship, what is the benefit of being in a relationship in this age?, you are a teenage and this is not a suitable time to be in a relationship , do you know how many problem may happen to you only because of this unnecessary relationship, if a inadvertentl pergency happen, can your teenage boyfriend support you? Or does he really want to marry you and accept responsibility for you?, I think it's better everything happen in a right time, when you are kid only be a kid, when you are a teenage only be a teenage and after knowing yourself and being young after 20 you can find a reliable person, for being confident or finding confidence you don't need to make an annoying memory from your teenager , being in a relationship is the only way of being confident? Do all western people are successful in their relationship because they start to be inarelationship from teenager? after all this differences among cultures make this world a more interesting place my friend what I sayd is absolutely conscientiously and kindly , I really appreciate East culture because I believe this is a really better way to have a better life
1:45 The couple in the back be like: Woman: “Oh wow look at her dress” Man: “yeah it’s nice” Woman: “I should take a picture to send it to (whatever there child’s name is) (if they have one)” Man: “I- ok.” Woman: “ *takes picture* lovely” “very pretty lady” (This is just what I think happened lmao)
men not expressing their feelings is a worldwide problem, trust me. i wonder if that'll ever change with men. it kills them to share their thoughts, i don't get it, never will.
As a guy i can easly explain it- if i say i like u, then i said it and thats it, it doesnt change next day or in a week, it stays like that till i say otherwise so from my male pov no point repeating obvious thing ;)
6utS oh. cool, that's fine, but you should know that women need to hear that from time to time as they like repeating the obvious. :D wouldn't kill ya now would it
Indeed Sparky 84. In fact, it just so happened to me when a girl is "asking for my attention" and "chasing me" claiming to have romantic feelings and when I say it back, they just ignore me and forget about it (happened more than twice).
Bena Jota yeah there is a fine line with telling them ur feelings as women want what they can’t have as the grass is always greener on the other side . If a man is constantly saying I love u all with puppy eyes then they become repulsed by him. Like I said in the comment above women are a emotional mess
reason why is because of what the media has taught us what is the 'perfect guy'. guys and girls both have high standards..we're not really taught that its personality and whats the inside
popcorn pop exactly. for me it took some heartbreaks to understand that point, as well as empathy. honestly, I don’t care about height or race- as long as the person is kind, with an open mind and attractive to me, even if they aren’t to others (because beauty is relative- you might like something others don’t) and we have the same interests, then I’m down for it
The reason isn't movies. The reason is people are putting others on a pedestal by treating them special, when they don't deserve it. So they feel entitled to special treatment because of superficial reasons.
"They don't Express their feelings so we don't know what they want" "There's a communication problem" "They want too much attention and too many messages" 😑 Now I know why so many people are sexless un Japan
triky5384 It's not about "sex". It's about a lack of connection. Men are less wired for expressing emotions, and women find it hard to understand them. Likewise, a lot of men don't understand the way women express their emotions or their need to have emotions spelled out for them.
I have many single , no boyfriend since birth Japanese girl friends and I notice that they have different reasons. Two of them are pushing 30. One of them really wants to get married and have kids but nobody asks her out or show any interest in her which is a pity because she’s one of the nicest girls in my company. She takes care of herself well, even goes to derma every week but no luck. I told her that she should go out and meet new people because she won’t find anyone if she doesn’t socialize enough. The other one wants children but no husband. She thinks that the person who will marry her will just get tired and leave her eventually. And she thinks having a husband will just be bothersome and inhibiting. She’s a close friend of mine and even though she said all those things I can tell that deep inside that she longs for intimacy. I agree with most of the girls here that Japanese men are really bad at communicating their feelings.
actually guys were the first ones to wear high heels :) it was normal in some countries for guys to wear make up in the middle ages Even in Egypt men and women used make up.....this goes back more than 2000 years Why it suddenly become taboo i have no idea x)
Not really, there was always a difference when they have used heels and make up compare to when woman start it to used, it was always in a more masculinity way, and them woman take more to they side, until become a stuff that only woman ended up using, making more feminine. Both used, but there was always a difference in style betweem man and woman using heels and make up.
If you do some history check regarding fashion you will learn that it was Louis the 14th who first wore heals. He is the father of fashion. He and his economics minister invented fashion because the French treasury was empty. He gave lights to Paris so people could stay up late and party. Clothing, shoes, hair styles, food, wine, furniture, perfumes anything to do with fashion he was the father and he saved the finances of France with it. France became the in place for all fashion in the world.Actually today it is Saudi Women who spend the most on cosmetics.
That was after carnival, because events like this come way before him, and it has all of that, i don't know if he was the creator of "fashion", but he didn't created the ideia of events like that. And about being the father of all of that, i don't know, he maybe play a big part of, but wasn't the "father". Probably used to his gain, and his governament gains, but no the father. Most of this stuff came before him.
I'm studying translation japanese-english at the moment and we're having a "japanese culture" course... in it we had to write an essay on any aspect we wanted to explore about their culture, so I decided to dig on the performing and creation of the "onnagata" figure (basically a prostitute guy making out female gender roles in kabuki) in the light of economic and cultural aspects of the tokugawa shogunate... well, it turned out to be a new form of ambiguous gender identity which was so succesful in terms of setting up a brand new "female aesthetic" that both boys and girls coming from all sort of classes (samurai, aristocrats, merchants and even peasants) wanted to fantasize with them and to be like them: wearing delicate makeup, performing soft and tender body movements, etc... just the same thing the girl from this video is saying: "I like boys wearing makeup"... I wonder if japanese people are aware of their past with respect to this kind of thing
Dating in Denmark is really easy compared to this 😂 We often meet through mutual friends and sometimes the guy chooses a place, sometimes the girl pays and vice versa. Marriage isn't a big deal so it's more about having fun together and being happy 😊 in general I think Danish guys are good at asking girls how their day was and giving small gifts based on what they actually like 👌
I know everyone has different preferences cos its their preferences, but that first lady, ummm thats a pretty high standard lady, it will be difficult for her to find a date and men to date her.
In my opinion people have lost what it means to live for another. You need a steady job, know how to manage your money, be responsible. Things happen in life and in my opinion people give up on each other way to fast. I think this secular culture we live in has a lot to do with it.
nope..it's reality..an inflation of economy cause people to be picky in relationship...the first lady with black shirt nailed it ..financial security is the most important aspect ..height buff body muscular just add-ons bonus
financial security, if u dont live in 3rd world country u have that, even if u are avg or below avg salary wise, ppl in rich countries simply has no clue what real poverty looks like
James Williams I think so, too. A lot of people have high standards for others without much willingness to give the same to them. People mention financial security. Well, I see lots of people wanting a rich partner so he/she can just ride their coattails and be provided for. It's become more take than give, and that causes a lot of failed relationships.
Yes, we've become smarter. It's meaningless pushing yourself to stay with someone incompatible just because. Managing money and stability has nothing to do with relationships. You should aim at all that on your own - you don't need a partner to set such goals.
@@pithikoulis even more when said partner is just a money sink. all for what? a passive envy, a floating desire, an inflated ego....she will require for you to sacrifice most fruits of what you work all to tell you, you didn't give enough while she doesn't bring much.
The girl in the second video had cuts all up her arms :( Cathy should try to do a interview on depression and anxiety opinions in Japan. (Don't know if she has done this before, just now found this channel).
One thing I don’t agree with is what they girl in the hat said about boys wearing makeup. I think it’s great that a guy worries about his makeup. If you think you have to work harder, that means you aren’t confident in your appearance. You shouldn’t make your boyfriend/possible boyfriend feel ashamed for worrying about his appearance because you don’t take care of yours to ‘society standards’. I once dated a guy who wore makeup and it was great because he noticed things that I was doing wrong and helped me out. Plus, we looked great in photos and were both super comfortable with one another. Maybe it’s a societal thing.
Sounds like the same as worldwide. Especially when you look the video where she asks the boys, too. There where many things that were mentioned by both genders. For me, it comes down to communication. Talk to each other about each other. Be honest. Don't know why, but I feel the urge to listen to Beastie Boys "Ill Communication" now. ;-)
I would loooove if this had Japanese subtitles as well!! (Yeah I know, I'm being greedy, but I'm learning Japanese and this natural conversation is awesome)
Miscommunication is such a big issue everywhere! If you don't know what he wants, what you want, where are you standing in his life, how much you may mean to him or him to you... Then that relationship would feel like a blindfolded game but you cannot even say Marco or Polo. Also, you don't need to know every detail either, but I think having basic things clear between both of the parties and working together in order to live in harmony, where both are appreciated, safe and cared/loved for is just so important. I think, overall balance, lots of effort from both parties and searching or aiming for eachother's well being may be the key to a healthy relationship.
I feel like a lot of people stop giving affection to their intimate partner and stop taking them out after a while because their partner starts to act different. The façade falls, their true self is revealed, and they start becoming abusive. Then, you stop taking them out because they don't treat you well anymore. That's what happened to me anyway. I'd take a woman out and treat her special for the rest of my life if she treats me just as well. If she starts treating me badly, out stop taking her out.
Love this channel but wish there was more variety And more time for interviews... I love the recap with cathy cat..but if that's gonna happen for 3 min then why not add more time for interviewing then have your usual 3 - 4 min wrap up ....idk just asking ...love the vids
Relationships are getting so hard these days lol. It’s not just japan everywhere people make the smallest things deal breakers like texting. I think it’s normal to communicate with someone your dating at least once a day.... I dated a korean guy who was quarter Japanese he also would limit our texting to one hour per day it was so strange....he wanted me to be cutesy and and never swear or be emotional I’m Latina we are passionate and full of emotion, I can’t live a life where someone wants to program me like I’m some kind of doll eeek.
So after watching both this video and the reversed video about issues Japanese guys have with Japanese girls, I've noticed that there are quite a lot of problems that both sides claim to have with each other, like jealousy and being controlling, being overly clingy and demanding (texting or talking on the phone all the time), having to plan things, gifts etc.
I’ve never dated with that kind of Japanese guys. Most of them became to show their feelings and affections after being together. I’m Japanese and think it’s like fifty fifty
In my country, all the guys I like(good guys) don't ask me out but random guys (like f boy type) that have no class or anything, just try their luck by hitting on me. And this happens from 'good' guys to 'bad' guys. PLUS the guys here have this thing of stringing you along by being friends and always being a confident flirt. But they won't confess or ask you out. Like what even is that? rUDE. Perhaps that's just university student culture though. I draw this from my experiences and of those around me including seeing my guyfriends act like this to girls. -South Africa
Otoka gi so you sit and wait for guys to confess to you? If you have interest in someone why don't you confess? :) that way you will at least know were you stand
When you don't like them, you become too picky about the things they do or have. But if you really love them, you'll accept them and join them in what they do and they'll happily do the things you want too.
theres nothing out of the ordinary for any one person to have high standards for who their looking, as she was clearly stated in the video, its not about looks
Honestly she was just honest... some people are very picky like that and it's best to hear it ahead of time so you aren't guessing your way through and awkward relationship.
I think not only in Japan but also other Asian countries, both girl and boy just feel each other on what the other like, they will will just know when to do something without telling it verbally.
the weirdest thing for me was the girl that complained about spending to much money because she has to buy clothes for a date XD. WTF I never bought a new piece of clothing just for a date and most of the time the guy wouldn't even notice, especially if the relationship is fresh.
@Cameron Pangborn thats like saying you should wear whatever you want to an interview. Pretty sure interviewers want to see who you really are and not some fake facade either
@@de20 but you want to deceive the interviewer to think you are more valuable than you are. So may be that's what the problem is? That they treat dating as a job and want to make a false impression on the guys too?
@@miloradowicz I wasn't clear enough in my comment with the sarcasm, sorry about that. What I meant was, it's natural to dress to impress. You'd want people to see you at your best, it's also a sign of respect when you take the time and effort to dress up for the occasion. It is ridiculous to compare one's appearance with a "fake facade"
I’m impressed that the girls said so straight forward so many specific requirements.... I would be a least embarrassing being so picky in a interview because I’m not perfect and waiting someone to be so specific is just...
Guys in the US are knuckleheads, too. Hollywood movies are generally unrealistic when it comes to romance. Car parts always make nice gifts! Honestly, if a woman is willing to keep me company while I change the oil on my truck, help wash the car, or spend time with my dogs, that is better than spending money.
I'd rather get a tool than a part that way I could use it more as a reminder and if we break up I could give it back a lot easier than a car part I already installed
Pedro Espere If it was a gift, you`re not obligated to give it back, likewise, you don't ask for one back. If you have to think about that as part of the criteria for a gift, you should part ways.
"Boys who constantly want to be in touch are a pain" < agree with this. my ex was like this he keep asking why I didnt message him? why I didnt call him? well I'm busy with my work, and I cant take out my phone in public transportation because its so dangerous. and he accusing me I'm cheating with other guy
It's not that they don't know what love is. Just the fact that after their 20's they don't care about it anymore and are interested more in their financial situation in present and the future.It's part of their culture to find someone based on personal interest.Don't forget they come from an era where arranged marriage was the norm until mid 20's century and it's still present in a ratio of 7% nowadays so they barely had time to adopt the western philosophy of being free . Most of them have parents come from that era so they have been taught from children age what to look in a partner if you are a girl or a guy(to see marriage as a necesity not luxury).So marrying someone based on feelings is something new and still unusual for now,it will have to pass a few more generations first.It's one of the reasons they have the sex industry so developed because very few couples are happy with their partner since they see it as a necesity.:) No need to hate someone for how they have been raised
I'm just gonna say it: it's okay to have a list, but don't be so frikin' picky. Not everyone is a Ken doll with a perfect height, look and all the money. The emotional part I can understand it, but bruh, if your partner (or future partner) can't properly comunicate in a daily basis then you should sit, make thing clear and be concise about what you can give and want in return, but don't be expecting that person change like puff: new babe version 2.0, every bug fixed. Comunication is important and is something that need to be active and clear, but remember you can't (and shouldnt) change people so it can fit your ideal type.
Hear hear, communication is key with all types of relationships. No wonder the population is going down in Japan, they are more focused on superficial relationship issues than what really matters. It's like he/she loves me right, so he should be able to read my mind. Nope, big nope.
Problems in japan are also the social standards to make someone "acceptable", they have so much weight in their opinion of each other (and as men seem to have problems expressing their feelings, superficial things seems to be the factors taken in account).
well at least she admits that shes picky its actually quite normal to choose higher standards no sane person would choose some1 they think is bad. obviously standards differ from person to person but sometimes not being picky just means ur ok with anythin lol which isnt exactly good either
Why is everyone so made at the first girl? She openly admitted that she knows she's picky and has her own requirements. There's nothing wrong with that, everyone had their own standards. It's respectable that she admitted her flaws but she knows what she wants. I don't see anything wrong with her?
A man using makeup is totally fine. 1. He looks better. 2.He is cooler and we probably have similar hobbies that we can enjoy together. 3. He shows no fear and rebels against social expectations like I do. If you ever met a boy like this who hetero or bi go for him. He ain't no regular fuckboy.
Gosh they are all so cute!! (and i'm a girl) That first girl is like me though... gosh when you're thinking about marriage, there are so many criteria. It's hard to have both head and heart point in the right direction. Phew!
As a guy I thought we worried about criteria more. Well maybe not the same criteria but things like logistics (where will we live, our families, culture clash for families if applicable, my potential wife's preferred role as breadwinner or housewife, kids, things that we will get the kids to learn (like languages or instruments), values, religion, political views, our own parents, etc etc etc). Looks are important too but that if we cant fix the logistics, we are just friends that have feelings for each other.
@@danshakuimo most of those criteria you mentioned will likely become known once you've dated a while, and i've known many couples who broke up because of irreconcilable core values and life goals. However, a lot of these can change over time and may be malleable. We will often cater to our partner's wishes because we love them. I think it is impossible to expect your wife/husband to share 100% of your values and beliefs. It is imperative for there to be compromise on both sides and the spirit of resolving problems in order to keep a relationship working. Don't be too rigid about the logistics, because life is unpredictable and you can't control everything. Sudden job changes, moving overseas, sudden illness or disability, or other family issues can't be micro-managed. Gotta be flexible. Good luck! Also... why is it important for your prospective wife to decide whether to be breadwinner or housewife? Why can't both you and her work and share parenting duties?
I would honestly see that change as a positive. It means he's integrating you into his family's life, so there seems a higher chance of the relationship going somewhere...right?
@@jonquilgemstone I think they meant 'family diners' - a type of restaurant in Japan that doesn't specialise in anything and is known to provide a cheap meal, good for families with kids on a day out. Not really where you go on your day out with friends or on a date
@@animeloverXinuyasha Ohhhh, that makes more sense! Still, why would that be a bad thing? They can't expect someone to keep spending on the same high quality over and over again-it adds up.
I've been reading this book on attachment theory recently and after watching both videos from the girls side and the boys side all I can see are examples they go through in the book... There are probably more to the problems as well but some of the problems just stem from having incompatible attachment styles
hi cathy! have you done a video about foreigners settling down in Japan and seeing native japanese peoples responses? as a westerner it's implied that japan welcomes foreigners as tourists but is mostly a homogeneous country when it comes to citizens. could you ask japanese if they think its okay if non Japanese people live in Japan (and if you have asked then id appreciate a link) thanks !
Omg yes, japanese men are so shy and so was i so it was extra hard lol when i was in Japan. Most my male friends (in Japan) do wear make up and look pretty haha, but i see much problem in that and most girl my age dont either. My bf even wears some and i dont wear any make up except lip tint lol but yeah.
I wouldn’t say only teenagers, but mostly those in high school and college are the only ones who can go to concerts regularly, because once you enter a Japanese company your social life outside of work is over (other than drinking w coworkers) it’s not as big a trend as it was though, that’s for sure. Many Japanese people won’t even know what it is, or they’ve heard of it vaguely thru xjapan.
I don't think that if guys wear makeup, that girls should treat them or see them in a diffrrent way, like won't it be fun to relate and show your. Boyfriend your makeup hacks and tricks and to do your makeup together and bond with him on something you have in common, like I personally think that men should express themselves however they wanna be, even if in society, you don't see it as often, just let men express themselves whoever they wanna be,the world is changing and we are moving into a world slowly where's sterotypes don't exist and people are breaking boundaries.
It's common to hear ladies complain about indecisiveness and neediness. It's my impression women want to follow a man worth following. So first learn to lead your own life righteously. If you're forthright and flexible according to your genuine interests and beliefs you never pander or act out of character for expediency. Perfect example is always asking where to eat, what to do and how to do it. Chances are, if you genuinely imagine going for curry then a walk will be a good evening, it likely will. Even if whoever your courting (or already in a relationship with) tells you they're opposed to something, being receptive and flexible enough to change plans is fine. You acted with good intentions so there's no worries. Trying to get the ball rolling and leading the way is appreciated. I'd say it's expected and wanted from a man. Maintaining family, friends and hobbies alongside a partner means you're not forcing her to fill that void either. It's about living your own life with someone and not for them. Being too dedicated and too accomodating means you bend to the wind--their wind. If they can blow you around you're predictable and boring. As the women in this video shows, no formal gallantry replaces that gut feeling of excitement and respect for a grounded man willing to lead.
i think its just her overall look: her makeup, outfit, the fact that she's interviewing people with a camera and microphone. maybe they thought she was a celebrity or something?
Hee Sing Sia As charming as she is, you must admit her look is extremely unique. How many people do you see dressing like her on a regular basis? Our Cathy is just a special flower among people 😊🌼❤.
I dated and went out with japanese guys, some of these concerns are really familiar. I know that feeling of them changing after we started dating. Oh God... that'd just so うざいね。The efforts really stopped. And no expression of love too. Girls like when hearing their bf say, I love you! But when I asked why he didn't say that anymore, he ended up scolding me and said, "why I need to say that? I don't like to say that often n blah3". Waaaa... he said it non-stop when we first started flirting. とてもきらいね、このattitude.
Dating can be quite superficial in Japan. To some extent, the idea that the man should care for the woman, and thus earn more money, is still common. Not every girl is like it. My girlfriend is Japanese and we have been dating for over two years now, and she supports me just as much as I support her. Stuff like money has never been an issue. But you aren't completely wrong. When it comes to dating it Japan, it's not uncommon for the girl to place many things above love/attraction.
I relate to the girl and the whole makeup thing. I also wouldn't want my man wearing nail polish as I see it as feminine too, but that seems to be a trend with straight males lately (at least in my generation (Z) )
“When I like him 100% he might only like me 50%”
This sounds depressingly familiar.
Have you noticed scars from cutting herself on her arms? It is a sign that she isn't emotionaly stable. Maybe that is why she experiences emotions with double intensity?
@@pietroroberto6114 One partner being more invested than the other is a universal human experience. It's a high pressure society, and you don't know how old those scars are, or she was abused or neglected. Don't judge so easily.
@@pietroroberto6114 wait... some girls did that too? I thought it was just my ex, shes pretty quiet about stuff and suddenly shes sayin that she did that to herself and blame me for that wtf....
@@Bun1XO Don't let her guilt trip you. Part of being an adult is to take responsibility and control oneself. She was immature.
Seems like you have too high standards mi lady.
Bruh, these girls dont like when you send them memes?
wtf... without mutual meme sending, is it even a relationship?
Ikr😹
Nypes mood 😂❤
True
RIGHT? I can't
Memes r life how can they live without it
Wow this comment section is all attacking that one lady.
I get that she's very picky, but at least she admitted it on camera.
Mecks089 yeah totally agree, she knows she’s picky and she knows it makes it harder for her to find a dat. But what’s wrong with it. And she looks kinda elegant, not ugly at all. There seem to be some guys feeling hurt in the commenting area.
All people have different taste to tell them that they have to lower their standars why should they? If they know what they want then that's good :) no one has the right to say that it is wrong because maby your own standars may seem as wierd for the other person too so just let people be themselves and live their lifes as they want :)
Agreed, like and what? Mind your own business. Men are so miserable sometimes.
Wow. Men? It goes both ways. Nothing wrong with high expectation but don't expect your dream guy/girl to fall for you when you don't take care of yourself first. If you have high expectation, you also need to be prepared to stay single for long time or forever.
i understand her. she said that she’s already thinking of marriage so it’s normal to have high standards for her age.
Ah, the lack of communication and expressing emotions is a big problem with Japanese guys in my experiences. When I studied abroad in Japan during high school for a couple of months, the boys were super kind and sweet but were too shy. They’d often do nice things for me but could barely talk to me or look me in the eye because they were that shy! The boys who were interested in me wouldn’t tell me directly, they’d tell our mutual friend and that mutual friend would tell me. Being shy towards someone you have a crush on is fine but their level of shyness went through the roof. One guy I was friends with, the only guy who actually told me himself that he had feelings for me, could barely look at me or even be near me once he realized he had feelings for me because he was just so shy. And when he did confess to me it was over LINE and two minutes before my flight on my last day in Japan! So yeah, they are superrrrrr shy, but they do the sweetest things to show they care and actions speak louder than words :)
Princess Lily Oh that's good
I actually like guys who are really shy I think its really cute that they are shy but still show their affection towards you.
There are rarely any guys like that in my state in america.
T. F. Haha yeah, it’s adorable and so endearing! But if you’re a foreigner it’s even worse because they’re even more shy, this is true for Asian foreigners as well. Honestly it’s partially my fault for my friend as I should’ve notice the hints he was dropping. The golden rule for a girl looking for a boyfriend in Japan is courage, because a lot of the time (based on my experiences) you’re going to be the one that has to make the first move. But it’s usually worth it ☺️
Princess Lily Thanks for the advice but unfortunately i wouldn't be going to Japan anytime soon since I'm still very young and i am from a second class family so i have to wait until i am older and have enough money but i am going to Korea first due to the fact i am learning the launguge and i will be a foreign exchange student then i am going to learn Japanese than go to Japan.
Because kids act that way. Adults behave differently
this is so sweet lmao
Personally, my issue was finding someone I was interested in. I'd have guys ask me out, but I didn't feel any connection to them. After college, I turned to online dating. After a month or two, I found someone I really liked. We talked, made it clear that open communication was important, and went from there. We just got married a month ago. I think being open and honest is most important, which gets rid of any "guessing games" couple have trouble with.
congrats dude and i think you are right
What a lucky girl, I’ve been chatting for a year with guys and nothing good yet lol
@@fernandacapetillo2371 Mayby try to revise your expectations? Sometimes people are aiming too high or even at unreal levels, while being a bit offerless themselves.
Now the question ALWAYS is... how long will it last? Lol u can’t relax jus cause u reeled one in lmao. Nothing lasts forever
Good plan, Stephen!👊
Hmm... when I first met my boyfriend in Japan I actually fell in love with him because he had a big heart and we had some deep heart to heart conversations. Maybe I’m not too picky. I guess I was rather taken aback since most people say Japanese men are shy and reserved and he’s very open with me and a big hugger and all that and sometimes uses the big word “Aishiteru” in a moment he truly feels it. I guess for me when I comes to love I just like to feel loved by the one I love I don’t really have any standards or expectations.
Aww, u r serioulsy amazing! I seriously think the same thing..😂
@@rei3463 I think it's quite a big and rare thing for couples to say in Japan, so most people won't say it to each other much (right?)
that’s p cute but saying aishiteru is kind of a weird thing to say in Japan 😂 usually you just say daisuki instead... (watched a vid about what not to say in Japan lmao, also half jp and have never heard it being used in my life) but you do you :) hope you still have a good relationship
@@penguin-tc1cx We do 😌
Because you have another view of relationships, you the real true pure meaning of what a relationship is about, because for those asian girls & families for them the relationship is about what they HAVE not about who they’re are in the inside too. I’m happy for you 💖🙏🏻 where you from?
I have learned that no matter the culture, you can always win a man over with food. If you don't know what to give him, give him food.
I'm a man, and that works very well with me :3 And I honestly don't even need gifts and such, a good company and nice food is enough for me.
i agree
That’s how to win a human, who wouldn’t come for a wonderful meal come on 🤦🏻♀️ it has nothing to do with gender
Jademoon25 Any men would throw up what I cook lol, women in my family don’t cook
@@karlaruiz8685 better start learning then its not so hard you just have to follow instructions ... oh wait :P
seriously though even if you do not do it for a man learn it for yourself being able to cook
will be a great skill to have in your life . being able to cook something nice the way you like it
will almost always be better than some take out and probably healthier
The one girl saying she feels like she had to buy new dresses or clothes for each date seems more like a problem she brought upon herself than it being the problem with the guy. Just wear what you got, girl. Lol.
Guys do like our girls to dress pretty, buuut... if a guy finds a girl to be attractive in an outfit once, he's not going to be upset if she wears the same outfit again...
Now, if she only has the *one* outfit and isn't a starving student, that might get a little boring, but that's a little extreme, and most women like to change their appearance around.
Face it, there wouldn't be so many dress shops and boutiques - and jewellers! - if gals didn't buy the pretties...
😅
I was on her shoes when I was younger-trying to impress a guy and it got out of hand-I started going broke😢
That first babe interviewed will be single for eternity
MrDboydeluxe nah, give few more years and she will be begging lmao. I give her one thing. Honesty. Whoever decides to date her, at least won’t feel cheated. Now will she be honest with the guy like she was on this interview?
First i thought she is 40 then like 20 still no idea how old she is.
Yup... Enjoy your house full of cats. End of story.
Lmao! Agreed!
She'll be another number to the stats. [Early access] to the fantastic world of old people who lives lonely in Japan (no cats, no life)
I agreed about constant texting...until she called "good morning" messages useless.
Texting too much takes away some things they can talk about in actual conversation...
but. I find saying good morning and good night cute and considerate!
Jonquil Gemstone I find it the most bothersome thing someone could ever do over text chat
For me she the most genuine girl. Being considerate is important in a relation but from the moment it's becomes mandatory it's just meaningless
You can better do something that's is really meaningful once a week instead of falling for the new(old) fake culture.
Japanese want it meaningful.
I really like the good morning and good night messages. They show the other person that you are thinking and caring about them
I hate that... I too find it useless.
"Saying "When are we meeting next" even though you didn't even meet yet."
Sounds like that message was meant for someone else.
Sadly my latest ex girlfriend was like that... She wouldn't do anything unless it was planned out weeks or months in advance... Assuming she remembered.
KOTheWorld I see it as either being insecure or just really wanting to see her again. That, and planning ahead allows both parties to reserve that time for each other in otherwise busy lives.
Bug Eye lol u need to calm down ;)
@@bugeye8749 I think you're watching too much JAV vids man
@@GregAtlas Awww sorry to hear about that. ♥
Also I'm sure there is someone who suits you better out there. ♥
Now that ive watched the boy's version i got a little confuse... The boys say that its a pain to plan dates... And the girls literally said that boys are too dependent on the girls tht thy hve to plan dates, earn money ect... Im pretty sure whts missing in their relationship is real communication
Hawa Najwa Abdullah how can you truly communicate if you’re always concerned about what the other person thinks? So you end up filtering what you really want to say (lying), and the relationship is built on BS. This is how things are in Japan. They’re not accustomed to real communication. You ever notice that the girls will usually answer something along the same line as her friends? She doesn’t want to be different from the collective.
They seems like never been honest to each other about their feeling
Yeah that girl who said the make up for men trend is coming from Korea isn't lying at all. Saw the Korean goalkeeper in the world cup wearing some bb cream or concealer! Really surprised me.
ChoosinUsername he wearing make up? how do you know that?
Well I wear sun tan lotion. Does that count?
Concealer is one thing, but damn foundations, are you shitting me.
Can't be, unless he's on a show, it's mandatory for everyone to put on make up on shows.
@HandsOffStalker pesonally i don't think anybody (boys and girls alike) should be obliged to do makeup.Makeup is solely a personal choice and shouldn't be perceived as a requirement of some sorts.
to everyone dissing the picky lady, some people prefer to be alone than in poor company/with men they have 0 feelings for.
giving in to pressure from others is a sure way to be unhappy for the rest of your life. Picky Lady, your time will come :) x
Yeah
But I personally think that feelings and love cannot be connected to material things like money...
So she doesn't even seem to know real love...she just wants the perfect man for selfish reasons.
They are called cat ladies, and will grow old alone, sad but true.
@@heilong79 Agree
The Wall is undefeated
Let them alone those picky
Reading the comments on the first interviewee, reminds me of a friend I have who actually put her standards high, after she got heartbroken & had give her all when the guy treated her like trash. So I do understand when girls/guys put their standard high, esp if they're dating to marry & not just date.
Strange, because the guy she described is precisely the type of guy who treats girls like trash. Those characteristics in no way garuantees she will be treated right, simply because she did not mention anything about personality or proper actions.
But...if that's the reason, the standards should be about personality. Idk about you, but I think traits like humility, generosity, and patience should be on a woman's list if she makes one to protect herself.
@@maro0532 yeah cool so funny to hear such things from men who are obsessed with their gfs being beautiful, shaved and not overweight
@@kateraspberry7634 I'm a girl what do you mean
So the girl had zero standards for the bad boy? That sounds about right. Women only have a set of standards for guys they don´t like.
If he has a hobby, get him something related to his hobby. Its literally that simple.
Mike The Gamer I’ll buy my husband a pornhub t-shirt than I suppose, seems to be the only hobby he has.
@@alicewong9935 In that case, buy some sexy lingerie for yourself.
Hahaha i would have to buy mine his R32 😅
Mike The Gamer my man you are assuming that every hobby is like yours, which I assume is gaming. If they’re into for example cars or computers, what she gonna do? 😂 buy him a new set of wheels? A graphics card?? Not only are those extremely expensive but without asking him directly she will have no idea what to get him. Girls are so much easier to shop for. Sincerely, someone with an engineer boyfriend and car hobbyist brother 😂 been struggling for years.
The_Lomax no one said there was anything problematic about asking? But then no gift will ever be a surprise. However my point is about expensive hobbies so... been with my boyfriend 8 years and the communication really couldn’t get any better.
I think the fish reference applies to pretty much anywhere and happens to both men and women.
I TOTALLY AGREE
I met a lady called fish once
Since I live in Japan for now some time and am in a relationship w/ a Japanese guy, I thought I’d give my opinion on dating a Japanese boy/ what startled me.
1- Japanese boys ( I’m in high school so I’m talking about high school love) won’t talk to you that much in high school. They’ll talk to you even less after getting into the relationship.
2- In public they won’t do skinship or very few (the ones who hold hands are very very rare, as a lot of high school don’t allow relationships).
3- Japanese boys are « fragiles » like you have to lead them most of the time. You have to send the first message, you have to chase them if you want them as they’re too shy/ self concious about making some moves
4- Relationships are a way to have fun. So most Japanese guys place their gf under their friends and they see it as something to have a good time; as a club or something. So they won’t be that much with you/ won’t reply to text in seconds...
5- Japanese boys won’t necessarily tell their friends when they are dating you, don’t take it personally, they just want to escape awkward moments with their friends (japanese boys don’t talk that much about girls)
6- Japanese boys don’t necessarily like opening about their problems. That doesn’t mean they don’t like you, they just want to not be needy/complainant.
7- they see on the very long term (my japanese boyfriend told me that he had very « short » relationships and then I found out that his « shortest » relationship was a 2 year long one)
8- they’re clueless about girls & the « fish » thing is true so you’ll end up having the feeling of being in a relationship with urself. LAST THING: THIS IS NOT TRUE FOR EVERYONE. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT. I HAD REALLY PASSIONATE PARTNERS AND EXPERIENCED RLLY PASSIONATE LOVE THERE TOO (it was with a haafu but still, he was pretty Japanese). But yeah that’s some things I often found in Japanese boys’ personalities.
スイレン tell him clearly what you think. That you are not ok with him ignoring you, and if he has some problems that make him not reply to you, that he needs to share it so that u’ll understand 100% of what’s happening
@@lead2181 Japanese seems to be the worst race to be born into lmao... the way that these comments are framing it
@@fridayimp7784 Lol maybe the guys are just scared of being rejected and dont want to seem creepy and scare away the girl by constantly messaging her.
Wow. I’m too independent in relationships for many people so I need to find myself someone from japan lol
Japanese people are usually shy but more than that, they respect others and put others’ feelings before theirs , so I guess they become way too self conscious and end up saying nothing.
4:35 i thought she was holding a cotton candy.😂
🤣🤣
Wow, people went absolutely savage at the lady as if they're personally targeted. The world must be so cruel for their fragile ego lol. She's gorgeous and has a good understanding of what type of relationship she's looking for, OBVIOUSLY she's gonna be picky. What do people expect? I really respect her for not giving in to nasty comments she's bound to hear a lot and keeping her principles.
ikr. honestly my hatred for men increases with each comment of such.
You're definitely a twitter user
@@kateraspberry7634 rare to see misandrists who are open about it
She is honest and that is good. The empty moral ideal phrases of many western answers to such questions do not bring any real insight.
Fragile ego? Since when have real men given a fuck about women with fake personalities 😂
height, race, wearing makeup, none is a problem for me. as long as he person is kind, with an open mind and we get along well, and I find them attractive enough as well (though that’s a bonus even though we get attracted by looks first, right? but personality is what conquers) I don’t even care.
also like one of the girls said: possessive or too clingy people are a pain to me. I like to be with my partner when I have one, but I also like to sometimes be alone or hang out with friends. I agree with the last two girls
Mari i assume you've seen a lot , in the end it's all about not wanting to die alone
MIA Iruha yes, just dealt with tons of people and their characters so far. so, my opinion broadened a bit on this. when you’re young and inexperienced you tend to idolize too much
Well Mari nothing wrong with an open mind until it starts leaking out of your skull.
Its a respectable attitude if you give the same curtesy to your partner. If you can be alone and have time with your friends then the same must be true to your partner, otherwise you became a suffocating glue which most guy finds annoying.
Ikr i just want someone i get along well to stay with me till we died, race and gender are never an issue, looks kinda do sometimes but if i like your personality than it doesn't matter that much.
It's a cultural problem. I'm a chinese and i totally undertand that...in the western world kids are teach and encourage very young to explain them self and parents encorage them to get more confident. All my westerner school friends has boyfriend or girlfriend as young as 12 -14 years old. Parents are interessed by their relationship and guide them trough it...my friend mom told be that relationship is the most difficult thing in the world and you can't learn it at school. So parents are not against early age relation. Their let their kids explore , gain experience and maturity. Asian people are far behind. How can you expect young adult to act un a certai way they never done before.
I completely agree! I'm from the Netherlands and lived in China for the past year, I feel like parents in most Asian cultures are overly protective to their children. In my country if kids are playing outside in a slightly dangerous situation the parents don't take action, when the kid then gets hurt it's a valuable life experience and he/she won't make the same mistake. This is how children get taught to be more independent whereas most Asians I know are shielded from experiences like danger or love. As soon as the kids grow up and need to be independent, eg when they go to university, they don't have their parents to guide them around which might result in insecurity.
@Ronnie you mean lunar new year??
@Ronnie ooh haha, my previous comment was already from more than a year ago so I wasn't in china during covid19. According to my friends there it was a very strict tho.
I don't think it be a cultural problem this is a really perfect point of your cultura,may because you raised up by this culture you cant realize how priceless it is .
being in a relationship from 12 or 14 is not really good thing , let me explain, imagine you are are 14 now and in a relationship, what is the benefit of being in a relationship in this age?, you are a teenage and this is not a suitable time to be in a relationship , do you know how many problem may happen to you only because of this unnecessary relationship, if a inadvertentl pergency happen, can your teenage boyfriend support you? Or does he really want to marry you and accept responsibility for you?, I think it's better everything happen in a right time, when you are kid only be a kid, when you are a teenage only be a teenage and after knowing yourself and being young after 20 you can find a reliable person, for being confident or finding confidence you don't need to make an annoying memory from your teenager , being in a relationship is the only way of being confident? Do all western people are successful in their relationship because they start to be inarelationship from teenager? after all this differences among cultures make this world a more interesting place
my friend what I sayd is absolutely conscientiously and kindly , I really appreciate East culture because I believe this is a really better way to have a better life
@Fateme Mehnipour HAHAHA someone doesn't know Just-be first theory. Just start dating in your adulthood bro, when everyone's taken!
I searched for this and I’m so glad you made a video, from my experience, I’m 15, Japanese boys are really sweet, kind and caring
lool what a user name lol
The Tears of Jungkook yes they are really friendly
Erwin how do you actually know someone would be like that?
Erwin lol totally
popcorn pop I was inspired by TROS for this username😂😂😂
im japanese man .
almost japanese man is don't make up.
Please don't misunderstand.
切ゆう I always thought the Asian guys that wear makeup are gay, it’s only men in the west that wear makeup, it’s the same isn’t it?
Been to Japan and lived in South Korea, and I find that it's more applicable towards Korean males tbh.
Yeah compared to Korea but that's ok if they do and it's sth heartwarming because Japanese people rarely break any taboos
"Once the fish is caught you don't have to feed them again." Okay... then you get a dead fish
1:45
The couple in the back be like:
Woman: “Oh wow look at her dress”
Man: “yeah it’s nice”
Woman: “I should take a picture to send it to (whatever there child’s name is) (if they have one)”
Man: “I- ok.”
Woman: “ *takes picture* lovely” “very pretty lady”
(This is just what I think happened lmao)
taking picture of strangers is so rude in japan
men not expressing their feelings is a worldwide problem, trust me. i wonder if that'll ever change with men. it kills them to share their thoughts, i don't get it, never will.
As a guy i can easly explain it- if i say i like u, then i said it and thats it, it doesnt change next day or in a week, it stays like that till i say otherwise so from my male pov no point repeating obvious thing ;)
6utS oh. cool, that's fine, but you should know that women need to hear that from time to time as they like repeating the obvious. :D wouldn't kill ya now would it
Anne S. lol men do express there feelings. It’s women who are a emotional mess.
Indeed Sparky 84. In fact, it just so happened to me when a girl is "asking for my attention" and "chasing me" claiming to have romantic feelings and when I say it back, they just ignore me and forget about it (happened more than twice).
Bena Jota yeah there is a fine line with telling them ur feelings as women want what they can’t have as the grass is always greener on the other side . If a man is constantly saying I love u all with puppy eyes then they become repulsed by him. Like I said in the comment above women are a emotional mess
the first girl is a mood! i like how she knows that she’s picky and doesn’t seem to have a problem with it lol
@dunzodonalds7151 fleshlight for you
She will have a problem when she grows old and gets zero attention from men.
reason why is because of what the media has taught us what is the 'perfect guy'. guys and girls both have high standards..we're not really taught that its personality and whats the inside
popcorn pop exactly. for me it took some heartbreaks to understand that point, as well as empathy. honestly, I don’t care about height or race- as long as the person is kind, with an open mind and attractive to me, even if they aren’t to others (because beauty is relative- you might like something others don’t) and we have the same interests, then I’m down for it
We won't watch movies or read mangas if the characters aren't good-looking
Rina Putri Hadyarti exactly so can you blame people for wanting goodlooking, tall, has money boyfriends lol
I think someone should start an experiment ; blind dates where people wear blindfolds , so the dates are purely based on personally instead of looks.
The reason isn't movies. The reason is people are putting others on a pedestal by treating them special, when they don't deserve it. So they feel entitled to special treatment because of superficial reasons.
"They don't Express their feelings so we don't know what they want"
"There's a communication problem"
"They want too much attention and too many messages" 😑
Now I know why so many people are sexless un Japan
triky5384 It's not about "sex". It's about a lack of connection. Men are less wired for expressing emotions, and women find it hard to understand them.
Likewise, a lot of men don't understand the way women express their emotions or their need to have emotions spelled out for them.
If you want to know for sure be honest but gentle about your feelings and then ask about his feelings
Jonquil Gemstone Read my comment again
Japanese girl. Do you want to have sex? Japanese man. Hm I don't know.
@@jonquilgemstone "their need to have emotions spelled out for them" that sounds more like a guy thing tbh.
I have many single , no boyfriend since birth Japanese girl friends and I notice that they have different reasons. Two of them are pushing 30. One of them really wants to get married and have kids but nobody asks her out or show any interest in her which is a pity because she’s one of the nicest girls in my company. She takes care of herself well, even goes to derma every week but no luck. I told her that she should go out and meet new people because she won’t find anyone if she doesn’t socialize enough. The other one wants children but no husband. She thinks that the person who will marry her will just get tired and leave her eventually. And she thinks having a husband will just be bothersome and inhibiting. She’s a close friend of mine and even though she said all those things I can tell that deep inside that she longs for intimacy.
I agree with most of the girls here that Japanese men are really bad at communicating their feelings.
Men are going their own way
actually guys were the first ones to wear high heels :) it was normal in some countries for guys to wear make up in the middle ages
Even in Egypt men and women used make up.....this goes back more than 2000 years
Why it suddenly become taboo i have no idea x)
Nekoaya Zz because patriarchal toxic masculine religious zealot try to change reality...
Actually it was King Louis the fourteenth, the fashion king.
Not really, there was always a difference when they have used heels and make up compare to when woman start it to used, it was always in a more masculinity way, and them woman take more to they side, until become a stuff that only woman ended up using, making more feminine. Both used, but there was always a difference in style betweem man and woman using heels and make up.
If you do some history check regarding fashion you will learn that it was Louis the 14th who first wore heals. He is the father of fashion. He and his economics minister invented fashion because the French treasury was empty. He gave lights to Paris so people could stay up late and party. Clothing, shoes, hair styles, food, wine, furniture, perfumes anything to do with fashion he was the father and he saved the finances of France with it. France became the in place for all fashion in the world.Actually today it is Saudi Women who spend the most on cosmetics.
That was after carnival, because events like this come way before him, and it has all of that, i don't know if he was the creator of "fashion", but he didn't created the ideia of events like that. And about being the father of all of that, i don't know, he maybe play a big part of, but wasn't the "father". Probably used to his gain, and his governament gains, but no the father. Most of this stuff came before him.
The efforts boys put in at the start of a relationship is a whole world thing.
I'm studying translation japanese-english at the moment and we're having a "japanese culture" course... in it we had to write an essay on any aspect we wanted to explore about their culture, so I decided to dig on the performing and creation of the "onnagata" figure (basically a prostitute guy making out female gender roles in kabuki) in the light of economic and cultural aspects of the tokugawa shogunate... well, it turned out to be a new form of ambiguous gender identity which was so succesful in terms of setting up a brand new "female aesthetic" that both boys and girls coming from all sort of classes (samurai, aristocrats, merchants and even peasants) wanted to fantasize with them and to be like them: wearing delicate makeup, performing soft and tender body movements, etc... just the same thing the girl from this video is saying: "I like boys wearing makeup"... I wonder if japanese people are aware of their past with respect to this kind of thing
Dating in Denmark is really easy compared to this 😂 We often meet through mutual friends and sometimes the guy chooses a place, sometimes the girl pays and vice versa. Marriage isn't a big deal so it's more about having fun together and being happy 😊 in general I think Danish guys are good at asking girls how their day was and giving small gifts based on what they actually like 👌
Sounds wonderful!
These girls opened up so fast. It seems like they always wanted to say how they feel.
I know everyone has different preferences cos its their preferences, but that first lady, ummm thats a pretty high standard lady, it will be difficult for her to find a date and men to date her.
Jakku you just repeat what she said
Your pfp is the best ngl
She wants the 1% man but brings nothing to the table apart from headaches.
In my opinion people have lost what it means to live for another. You need a steady job, know how to manage your money, be responsible. Things happen in life and in my opinion people give up on each other way to fast. I think this secular culture we live in has a lot to do with it.
nope..it's reality..an inflation of economy cause people to be picky in relationship...the first lady with black shirt nailed it ..financial security is the most important aspect ..height buff body muscular just add-ons bonus
financial security, if u dont live in 3rd world country u have that, even if u are avg or below avg salary wise, ppl in rich countries simply has no clue what real poverty looks like
James Williams I think so, too. A lot of people have high standards for others without much willingness to give the same to them.
People mention financial security. Well, I see lots of people wanting a rich partner so he/she can just ride their coattails and be provided for. It's become more take than give, and that causes a lot of failed relationships.
Yes, we've become smarter. It's meaningless pushing yourself to stay with someone incompatible just because. Managing money and stability has nothing to do with relationships. You should aim at all that on your own - you don't need a partner to set such goals.
@@pithikoulis even more when said partner is just a money sink. all for what? a passive envy, a floating desire, an inflated ego....she will require for you to sacrifice most fruits of what you work all to tell you, you didn't give enough while she doesn't bring much.
That tourist lady at 1.46 is "trying" to be subtle when taking pictures of Cathy Cat 🤣
The girl in the second video had cuts all up her arms :( Cathy should try to do a interview on depression and anxiety opinions in Japan. (Don't know if she has done this before, just now found this channel).
One thing I don’t agree with is what they girl in the hat said about boys wearing makeup. I think it’s great that a guy worries about his makeup. If you think you have to work harder, that means you aren’t confident in your appearance. You shouldn’t make your boyfriend/possible boyfriend feel ashamed for worrying about his appearance because you don’t take care of yours to ‘society standards’. I once dated a guy who wore makeup and it was great because he noticed things that I was doing wrong and helped me out. Plus, we looked great in photos and were both super comfortable with one another. Maybe it’s a societal thing.
The only makeup a man needs is beard. Wearing anything else is pathetic.
At least the first lady knows SHES the problem lol
Well I mean she is thinking about marriage
that lady is amazing stfu
Strange that her parents won´t tell her this: Daughter, you will die alone.
Sounds like the same as worldwide. Especially when you look the video where she asks the boys, too. There where many things that were mentioned by both genders. For me, it comes down to communication. Talk to each other about each other. Be honest.
Don't know why, but I feel the urge to listen to Beastie Boys "Ill Communication" now. ;-)
I would loooove if this had Japanese subtitles as well!! (Yeah I know, I'm being greedy, but I'm learning Japanese and this natural conversation is awesome)
You can switch the cc into 日本語 but it's only one or the other
I feel like the answers would be more interesting if she interviewed Japanese women over the age of 17.
What do you mean? They are all over the age of 17
PoiAngelMelodyHamHam they meant older adults, maybe 30-40 or older
@@penguin-tc1cx they have low chances of relationship anyway ... no point to it
Ma’am all of the girls in the vid were over 17😂
Miscommunication is such a big issue everywhere! If you don't know what he wants, what you want, where are you standing in his life, how much you may mean to him or him to you... Then that relationship would feel like a blindfolded game but you cannot even say Marco or Polo. Also, you don't need to know every detail either, but I think having basic things clear between both of the parties and working together in order to live in harmony, where both are appreciated, safe and cared/loved for is just so important. I think, overall balance, lots of effort from both parties and searching or aiming for eachother's well being may be the key to a healthy relationship.
2:41 i just noticed her arms .. hope she’s okay ...
I feel like a lot of people stop giving affection to their intimate partner and stop taking them out after a while because their partner starts to act different. The façade falls, their true self is revealed, and they start becoming abusive. Then, you stop taking them out because they don't treat you well anymore. That's what happened to me anyway. I'd take a woman out and treat her special for the rest of my life if she treats me just as well. If she starts treating me badly, out stop taking her out.
Love this channel but wish there was more variety And more time for interviews... I love the recap with cathy cat..but if that's gonna happen for 3 min then why not add more time for interviewing then have your usual 3 - 4 min wrap up ....idk just asking ...love the vids
Relationships are getting so hard these days lol. It’s not just japan everywhere people make the smallest things deal breakers like texting. I think it’s normal to communicate with someone your dating at least once a day.... I dated a korean guy who was quarter Japanese he also would limit our texting to one hour per day it was so strange....he wanted me to be cutesy and and never swear or be emotional I’m Latina we are passionate and full of emotion, I can’t live a life where someone wants to program me like I’m some kind of doll eeek.
Is the third girl they interviewed ok? she looked like she had cuts or bruises ALL over her arms..
Shoot I noticed that also. I hope that's not recent...cause she needs to get some serious help if that's the case.
She’s not wearing long sleeves, so she’s not hiding them. If she’s not hiding them, she would be fine
That’s not true. Just cause you don’t hide things like that doesn’t mean you’re ok
That’s not true. Just cause you don’t hide things like that doesn’t mean you’re ok
That’s not true. Just cause you don’t hide things like that doesn’t mean you’re ok
So after watching both this video and the reversed video about issues Japanese guys have with Japanese girls, I've noticed that there are quite a lot of problems that both sides claim to have with each other, like jealousy and being controlling, being overly clingy and demanding (texting or talking on the phone all the time), having to plan things, gifts etc.
I’ve never dated with that kind of Japanese guys. Most of them became to show their feelings and affections after being together. I’m Japanese and think it’s like fifty fifty
I really admire you Cathy Cat.
In my country, all the guys I like(good guys) don't ask me out but random guys (like f boy type) that have no class or anything, just try their luck by hitting on me. And this happens from 'good' guys to 'bad' guys. PLUS the guys here have this thing of stringing you along by being friends and always being a confident flirt. But they won't confess or ask you out. Like what even is that? rUDE. Perhaps that's just university student culture though. I draw this from my experiences and of those around me including seeing my guyfriends act like this to girls. -South Africa
Otoka gi so you sit and wait for guys to confess to you? If you have interest in someone why don't you confess? :) that way you will at least know were you stand
Interesting interviews. Thumbs up
jeez. if we can make each other laugh & we have stuff in common, that’s all i need lol
When you don't like them, you become too picky about the things they do or have. But if you really love them, you'll accept them and join them in what they do and they'll happily do the things you want too.
theres nothing out of the ordinary for any one person to have high standards for who their looking, as she was clearly stated in the video, its not about looks
all single ladies in their 40s had high standards their whole life ;D
7:43 Yo, for a sec I thought that was Chris from Abroad in Japan! Lol that would be so crazy!
Makeup....... sounds like way too much effort honestly. I can get ready and dressed 15mins or less. Better than pizza delivery 😋
Wish there were subtitles. Atleast it's useful for familiarizing myself with gestures, enunciations and dialect.
Wu Basted you can use the caption option for English so you can get subtitles!
8:27 あ そうです、そうです、そうです、そうです、そうです、。。。Really made me laugh :)
Japanese proficiency can be based on how fast one can say 5 そうです, similar to how fast one Indian shakes his /her head five times
I miss your interactions face to face with people like this, I'm rewatching all the videos :(
Honestly I think the first girl was just trying to justify why she's single.
Honestly she was just honest... some people are very picky like that and it's best to hear it ahead of time so you aren't guessing your way through and awkward relationship.
*ACCCURATE AF*
Everything she spouted is what THE most insecure women rant about when “justifying” why their single lmfaoo
She is a pain in the ass that´s why she is single.
why don’t just choose together what to do? both say their opinion and after choose the best or easiest to do
3:47 i feel this is true everywhere
I think not only in Japan but also other Asian countries, both girl and boy just feel each other on what the other like, they will will just know when to do something without telling it verbally.
the weirdest thing for me was the girl that complained about spending to much money because she has to buy clothes for a date XD. WTF I never bought a new piece of clothing just for a date and most of the time the guy wouldn't even notice, especially if the relationship is fresh.
This is Japan Chomaru.
Yeah.. my friend does this..
I don't get it either 😧
@Cameron Pangborn thats like saying you should wear whatever you want to an interview. Pretty sure interviewers want to see who you really are and not some fake facade either
@@de20 but you want to deceive the interviewer to think you are more valuable than you are. So may be that's what the problem is? That they treat dating as a job and want to make a false impression on the guys too?
@@miloradowicz I wasn't clear enough in my comment with the sarcasm, sorry about that. What I meant was, it's natural to dress to impress. You'd want people to see you at your best, it's also a sign of respect when you take the time and effort to dress up for the occasion. It is ridiculous to compare one's appearance with a "fake facade"
I’m impressed that the girls said so straight forward so many specific requirements.... I would be a least embarrassing being so picky in a interview because I’m not perfect and waiting someone to be so specific is just...
Guys in the US are knuckleheads, too. Hollywood movies are generally unrealistic when it comes to romance. Car parts always make nice gifts! Honestly, if a woman is willing to keep me company while I change the oil on my truck, help wash the car, or spend time with my dogs, that is better than spending money.
TreeFriar Every woman melts for a man who loves his dog!
A non-car enthusiastic buying parts for a car enthusiastic sounds like a recipe for a returned gift.
Meloetta7 Not if they communicate!
I'd rather get a tool than a part that way I could use it more as a reminder and if we break up I could give it back a lot easier than a car part I already installed
Pedro Espere If it was a gift, you`re not obligated to give it back, likewise, you don't ask for one back. If you have to think about that as part of the criteria for a gift, you should part ways.
makes sense it is reflected in the japanese literature and comics and what not the shyness of the guys
"Boys who constantly want to be in touch are a pain" < agree with this. my ex was like this he keep asking why I didnt message him? why I didnt call him? well I'm busy with my work, and I cant take out my phone in public transportation because its so dangerous. and he accusing me I'm cheating with other guy
next time tell him you are in a secret goverment society..... and you are thinking to rule the world.... :D
Were you?
Leave
My ex cheat on me with my so called friend saying that he didn't get enough attention from me..
.. when I was hospitalized
@@fatinnajwaishak785 Seems like a classic story xD
It's not that they don't know what love is. Just the fact that after their 20's they don't care about it anymore and are interested more in their financial situation in present and the future.It's part of their culture to find someone based on personal interest.Don't forget they come from an era where arranged marriage was the norm until mid 20's century and it's still present in a ratio of 7% nowadays so they barely had time to adopt the western philosophy of being free . Most of them have parents come from that era so they have been taught from children age what to look in a partner if you are a girl or a guy(to see marriage as a necesity not luxury).So marrying someone based on feelings is something new and still unusual for now,it will have to pass a few more generations first.It's one of the reasons they have the sex industry so developed because very few couples are happy with their partner since they see it as a necesity.:) No need to hate someone for how they have been raised
Personally, I would choose common decency, shared life goals and mutual respect over love any day. Love is a delusion.
I'm just gonna say it: it's okay to have a list, but don't be so frikin' picky.
Not everyone is a Ken doll with a perfect height, look and all the money. The emotional part I can understand it, but bruh, if your partner (or future partner) can't properly comunicate in a daily basis then you should sit, make thing clear and be concise about what you can give and want in return, but don't be expecting that person change like puff: new babe version 2.0, every bug fixed. Comunication is important and is something that need to be active and clear, but remember you can't (and shouldnt) change people so it can fit your ideal type.
Hear hear, communication is key with all types of relationships. No wonder the population is going down in Japan, they are more focused on superficial relationship issues than what really matters. It's like he/she loves me right, so he should be able to read my mind. Nope, big nope.
It's perfectly fine to be as picky as you want, but you don't get to complain when you can't find anyone
Problems in japan are also the social standards to make someone "acceptable", they have so much weight in their opinion of each other (and as men seem to have problems expressing their feelings, superficial things seems to be the factors taken in account).
well at least she admits that shes picky its actually quite normal to choose higher standards no sane person would choose some1 they think is bad. obviously standards differ from person to person but sometimes not being picky just means ur ok with anythin lol which isnt exactly good either
Well I am so there.
Why is everyone so made at the first girl? She openly admitted that she knows she's picky and has her own requirements. There's nothing wrong with that, everyone had their own standards. It's respectable that she admitted her flaws but she knows what she wants. I don't see anything wrong with her?
Girl complaining about boys using make up and i'm like : But i want cute boys too wtf XD
me: YOU WEAR MAKEUP?!?!
him: Yes, I do
me: OH MY GOD...
TEACH ME I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO OR WHERE TO START
If a dude wears make-up, girls should stay a mile away.
Yeah but they’re men n they’re suppose to be masculine..
A man using makeup is totally fine. 1. He looks better. 2.He is cooler and we probably have similar hobbies that we can enjoy together. 3. He shows no fear and rebels against social expectations like I do. If you ever met a boy like this who hetero or bi go for him. He ain't no regular fuckboy.
@@orangeleaf9615 F
Gosh they are all so cute!! (and i'm a girl) That first girl is like me though... gosh when you're thinking about marriage, there are so many criteria. It's hard to have both head and heart point in the right direction. Phew!
As a guy I thought we worried about criteria more. Well maybe not the same criteria but things like logistics (where will we live, our families, culture clash for families if applicable, my potential wife's preferred role as breadwinner or housewife, kids, things that we will get the kids to learn (like languages or instruments), values, religion, political views, our own parents, etc etc etc). Looks are important too but that if we cant fix the logistics, we are just friends that have feelings for each other.
@@danshakuimo most of those criteria you mentioned will likely become known once you've dated a while, and i've known many couples who broke up because of irreconcilable core values and life goals. However, a lot of these can change over time and may be malleable. We will often cater to our partner's wishes because we love them. I think it is impossible to expect your wife/husband to share 100% of your values and beliefs. It is imperative for there to be compromise on both sides and the spirit of resolving problems in order to keep a relationship working. Don't be too rigid about the logistics, because life is unpredictable and you can't control everything. Sudden job changes, moving overseas, sudden illness or disability, or other family issues can't be micro-managed. Gotta be flexible. Good luck!
Also... why is it important for your prospective wife to decide whether to be breadwinner or housewife? Why can't both you and her work and share parenting duties?
"when getting to know you its fancy restaurants, once you're dating its family dinners"
gold, meet plated shovel.
I would honestly see that change as a positive. It means he's integrating you into his family's life, so there seems a higher chance of the relationship going somewhere...right?
@@jonquilgemstone I think they meant 'family diners' - a type of restaurant in Japan that doesn't specialise in anything and is known to provide a cheap meal, good for families with kids on a day out. Not really where you go on your day out with friends or on a date
@@animeloverXinuyasha Ohhhh, that makes more sense! Still, why would that be a bad thing? They can't expect someone to keep spending on the same high quality over and over again-it adds up.
Ohhh myyyy gosshh... 2:09
She just proved how considerate guys and the world are to women and girls.
I pity the camera man(if it's a male).
I've been reading this book on attachment theory recently and after watching both videos from the girls side and the boys side all I can see are examples they go through in the book... There are probably more to the problems as well but some of the problems just stem from having incompatible attachment styles
4:36 I thought she was holding a cotton candy LMAO
"You dont feed the fish you caught" sounds like my ex
love your videos!
hi cathy! have you done a video about foreigners settling down in Japan and seeing native japanese peoples responses? as a westerner it's implied that japan welcomes foreigners as tourists but is mostly a homogeneous country when it comes to citizens. could you ask japanese if they think
its okay if non Japanese people live in Japan (and if you have asked then id appreciate a link) thanks !
you have to know eachother first so you know what gifts to give them duh, they're your boyfriend not your towel-receiving distant relative
Women: We want to join the work force
Women: We want men to make more than us!
I get having personal preference/tastes... but having so many expectations is bit....
1:10 Good luck finding that size in Japan.
Omg yes, japanese men are so shy and so was i so it was extra hard lol when i was in Japan. Most my male friends (in Japan) do wear make up and look pretty haha, but i see much problem in that and most girl my age dont either. My bf even wears some and i dont wear any make up except lip tint lol but yeah.
Only requirement should be "she/he must laugh of the same things i laugh"
Same sense of humor.
That's important.
6:19 , so japanese guys are watching too much korean dramas or is it hallyu effect on them
Can you ask what Japanese people think of visual kei
Dimlim Fan 21 Only teenagers like that and now it seems “out of style”.
I wouldn’t say only teenagers, but mostly those in high school and college are the only ones who can go to concerts regularly, because once you enter a Japanese company your social life outside of work is over (other than drinking w coworkers) it’s not as big a trend as it was though, that’s for sure. Many Japanese people won’t even know what it is, or they’ve heard of it vaguely thru xjapan.
I don't think that if guys wear makeup, that girls should treat them or see them in a diffrrent way, like won't it be fun to relate and show your. Boyfriend your makeup hacks and tricks and to do your makeup together and bond with him on something you have in common, like I personally think that men should express themselves however they wanna be, even if in society, you don't see it as often, just let men express themselves whoever they wanna be,the world is changing and we are moving into a world slowly where's sterotypes don't exist and people are breaking boundaries.
It's common to hear ladies complain about indecisiveness and neediness. It's my impression women want to follow a man worth following. So first learn to lead your own life righteously.
If you're forthright and flexible according to your genuine interests and beliefs you never pander or act out of character for expediency.
Perfect example is always asking where to eat, what to do and how to do it. Chances are, if you genuinely imagine going for curry then a walk will be a good evening, it likely will. Even if whoever your courting (or already in a relationship with) tells you they're opposed to something, being receptive and flexible enough to change plans is fine. You acted with good intentions so there's no worries. Trying to get the ball rolling and leading the way is appreciated. I'd say it's expected and wanted from a man.
Maintaining family, friends and hobbies alongside a partner means you're not forcing her to fill that void either. It's about living your own life with someone and not for them.
Being too dedicated and too accomodating means you bend to the wind--their wind. If they can blow you around you're predictable and boring. As the women in this video shows, no formal gallantry replaces that gut feeling of excitement and respect for a grounded man willing to lead.
They make it sound so complicated when in reality it really isn't and it shouldn't be.
1:48. Tourists think Cathy is weird?
i think its just her overall look: her makeup, outfit, the fact that she's interviewing people with a camera and microphone. maybe they thought she was a celebrity or something?
She is weird
Hee Sing Sia As charming as she is, you must admit her look is extremely unique. How many people do you see dressing like her on a regular basis?
Our Cathy is just a special flower among people 😊🌼❤.
I dated and went out with japanese guys, some of these concerns are really familiar. I know that feeling of them changing after we started dating. Oh God... that'd just so うざいね。The efforts really stopped. And no expression of love too. Girls like when hearing their bf say, I love you!
But when I asked why he didn't say that anymore, he ended up scolding me and said, "why I need to say that? I don't like to say that often n blah3". Waaaa... he said it non-stop when we first started flirting. とてもきらいね、このattitude.
I think that the first girl in the interview is the classic japanese woman
Too much for too less. EL CLASSICO
Dating can be quite superficial in Japan. To some extent, the idea that the man should care for the woman, and thus earn more money, is still common.
Not every girl is like it. My girlfriend is Japanese and we have been dating for over two years now, and she supports me just as much as I support her. Stuff like money has never been an issue. But you aren't completely wrong. When it comes to dating it Japan, it's not uncommon for the girl to place many things above love/attraction.
No it’s the classic deeply insecure woman.
Its called Asian parents and values. Parents always tell their kids to have high standards when it comes to dating.
She will become an old spinster.
I relate to the girl and the whole makeup thing. I also wouldn't want my man wearing nail polish as I see it as feminine too, but that seems to be a trend with straight males lately (at least in my generation (Z) )