Handling criticism & keeping the spark alive after 20 years together | Ellen and Andrew Fisher
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 มี.ค. 2023
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After much anticipation, I finally got my husband Andrew to sit down with me on the podcast and answer some of your questions about our relationship, what it’s like raising 5 children together, how we handle criticism, and keeping the spark alive after 20 years of doing life together.
Andrew is often a man of few words, but once he gets talking about something he’s passionate about, he shines. He does so much for our family behind the scenes, is an incredible father with a servant heart to our children, and is my biggest support in life. I am so excited for you to be part of this intimate conversation to hear what we laugh about, what we take seriously, the good, the bad, and the in-betweens in our relationship.
In this episode we cover:
- How we take care of ourselves individually to feel our best
- Why we prioritize health, nutrition, and fitness in our lives
- What it’s like to be married to each other
- Our life before TH-cam and how we made the transition to Hawaii and working online
- His experience being a father for 5 home births
- How we handle disagreements in our relationship
- Keeping the spark alive and having a growth mindset
- The traits and characteristics he hopes to instill in our children
- Bis support behind the scenes
- How we have handled criticism online and being put in boxes
- + so much more
WHERE TO FIND ME
Get The Empowered Pregnancy & Birth course: go.theempoweredbirth.com/ellen
Get my ebooks: www.ellenfisher.com/ebooks
My instagram: / ellenfisher
LISTEN to these episodes on Apple Podcast or Spotify: link.chtbl.com/ellenfisherpod
Family TH-cam channel: / ellenfisher
Elevate your videos with record-label quality music from Musicbed:
share.mscbd.fm/ellenfisher
I love that Andrew nurtures his spiritual life by reading the Bible. His peacefulness and convictions show brightly even if he doesn’t always say them in many words. :)
Favorite episode ever! Andrew is a natural and NEEDS to be a regular 🤍🤍🤍
Andrew should do a garden channel.
I am so grateful you found the time to create this episode, its definitely a favourite so far!! Its so comforting to hear about the realities of long loving relationships and the intention, love and accountability you need to bring to make a loving life together.
Love this!! Was so happy to hear that Andrew shares my Christian faith and that he spends time in the Word. Also, he is so gentle and kind regarding those that share different opinions. That's how it should be! Your relationship advice was so so good. Thank you.
In my experience, people don’t often get divorced because they ‘fell out of love’ and/or lost the spiciness in their relationship. It’s because the relationship with their partner is actively making them unhappy, maybe even spilling over into all facets of their life and removing their happiness entirely. If neither partner is willing to change, that’s when divorce is considered. And most people give their partner a lot of time. People don’t want to get divorced but it is an important survival tactic.
Spot on
Agree, it also happens sometimes due to abusive situations.
Well said
Wow thank you for this.
Having been married to a narcissist, I can say that I remember twisting myself into pretzels and doing more and more to please someone that never gave and took like a black hole. Inwould still be in that marriage but he cheated and moved in to that. After I healed I found my true life love. What a difference, and what a profound blessing to have been given that second chance, rather than whittling away my soul just to keep my marriage with someone who didn’t value marriage or commitment.
I just wanna say that both of you personalities show really well how much you have been loved by your parents and what an amazing jobs they’ve done raising you. And now, you are an amazing couple of lovers and parents too ❤
As a psychology student, I can say that this was a really good & healthy conversation between two adults in a long-term relationship! Everyone in a committed long-term relationship should watch it, they mentioned so many important aspects (with examples) that make a relationship successful. I also like how humble, but at the same time confident they both sounded, mentioning both their flaws and strengths and not trying to pretend that their relationship is always perfect. And I completely agree with Andrew regarding following different people on social media - I follow people from completely different backgrounds because it makes me understand society better and not because I would personally support someone's political views. Anyway, my favorite episode on this channel so far, good job. :)
Andrew doesn’t seem to understand that he is not triggered by people posting different opinions to him because that’s all it is to him, an opinion. For a lot of people, it’s not “just an opinion,” it’s a scary reality they have to survive every single day. I think Andrew is an intelligent man and if he took time to reflect, he’d understand that what’s a fun argument that feels safe and enjoyable for him to have as a well off white man, is actually so much more than an argument to others: it’s their everyday life.
THANK YOU
"it takes away their humanity" its not just an opinion or banter when it THREATENS peoples humanity and human rights
Always loved Andrew's presence. He definitely should be featured more. Beautiful family.
Best podcast ever! I see why Andrew is a great guy, it’s because he has God in first place. You are a blessed family.
Love you guys 😘
I have no clue how Andrew gets done all he does. The amount he juggles is impressive! Hats off to Andrew!
I have never judged Andrew but this was so so lovely to have so much more context of who he is after all these years of following you guys. You remind me so much of my husband and I.
Andrew is natural! Thanks guys 🙏🏼✨️❤️
The bible bit surprised me a lot. I love this episode
I loved this episode ✨ Andrew is very well spoken and it is refreshing to see a man who loves being a husband and father. Those are difficult to find. You two are very inspiring people and I love the family culture you have built together.
I love the fact that you both make such an effort to be intentional in your interactions with each other and your kiddos. This is something my husband and I are doing so much more now. He was diagnosed with a terminal illness 2 years ago and we are so aware that time is so precious. Your marriage is such a great example…😊
Love it already! Thank you for sharing Ellen & Andrew 💛
This is so great! Love you guys! Thank you so much for sharing!❤
Love this conversation! ❤ Thank you both! 🙏
Such a good one! Thank you both ❤
You are both so inspirational!! Thanks for sharing 🙏❤️
Great convo! You guys are so wonderful! It was fun seeing you chat!
Loved this! Hopefully we get to see more of Andrew!
I always look forward to all your conversations Ellen!!! ❤️
I LOVE this episode! Will Definitely be tuning in when more Andrew shows go live
Ellen & Andrew- thank you SO much for sharing this & inspiring!!!💕
This entire conversation is amazing . Thank you
I’m not really into astrology anymore but being a Capricorn & my husband being a Virgo I just knew you are a Taurus & he is a Virgo, I looked it up to confirm. I recognize the groundedness in both, the softness & beauty in you & the organized & facts are facts in him.
Thank you to both of you for that podcast. Very good. A second episode would definitely be more than welcomed 🙏🙌😊
i wish there were timestamps for each question
Only 30 minutes in and it’s already one of my favorite episodes!! ♥️♥️
This makes me love you guys even more! Andrew is an awesome person, glad we got to know him better :)
❤️❤️❤️ you both are such amazing humans. This episode inspired me to be more patient and loving towards my husband. Thank you for sharing ❤️❤️
This was great guys. A much enjoyed conversation. I’d enjoy hearing more from Andrew and yourself 🧡🌞
What a beautiful relationship you two have💗 Inspiring x
I would LOVE to see a video about your life when you first moved there and the first 5 years.
This was very sweet, very real, and a lovely way to get to know you both a bit better 💚 one of my favourites
Such a wholesome, beautiful and refreshing conversation. You two are such cool humans! Please do a part two😊
This was vs such a peaceful, fun, happy exchange between a married couple!
More please
We need a part 2😭🥰😘😘😘😘
I love love this! I love seeing the dynamic and I love seeing the respect you have for each other. I resonate with Andrew very much on seeing both sides of the picture! Definitely would love to see some more conversations from both of you ! I just admire you so much 😍
Loved this chat. Thank you for taking the time and sharing this one. Love you guys.
I can't believe people would go to the extent to look up for Andrew follows!
Also Australia would be a great place to visit 😅
Oh my goodness absolutely adored this! Love you guys 💗
I’m in New Zealand, please come! 😍
Andrew is amazing!!! 👏 Such a wise man and so patient. Very interesting and helpful episode!
This has been my favorite podcast so far. So beautiful and I wish this would be taught in schools ❤️
My favorite episode too! Your husband is so wise and you both are so cute! So happy to watch this! Hope to see Andrew much more on your podcast! Sending you love!
i loved this episode :) so nice to get to know andrew a little more
Im excited to listen to this one!!!
I loved this episode. So wholesome and calming and encouraging. Thank you for letting us get a glimpse into your lives. Would love more with Andrew as he is able and willing to appear! :)
It’s always enjoyable to see the two of you sit down and talk to your followers together. Thanks Ellen and Andrew! Another good episode.
Such a wonderful episode !! You both have such a healthy and humble attitude in your relationship. So inpsiring and beautiful. Please do regular episodes together. It's so great to see how you model great communication and to hear both of your perspectives.
Great episode! It was so interesting hearing about stuff that usually is not shared in the normal videos :) Thank you for giving us a peak of your experiences and views! I don't like putting people in boxes either and hearing both sides is super important to me.
The thing what is bothering me is when someone else tries to force their believes on other people, even when they objectively would be "right". In my opinion everyone should be able to live however they think is best for them, what is best in their experience, their believes, their faith, principles and all that ("live and let live") the problem I feel that the USA has (I'm from Germany) is that there only seems to be strong opinions on each side and no middle ground or willingness to compromise. For example the pro-choice, pro-life debate. Andrew said that because of his experience, believes and how he grew up, for him personally it's the right thing to be pro-life, which I can totally understand where he comes from. But other people, like he said, have different opinions, experiences and values and I think it's unfair to deny those people their right to choose what they think is best for them. That's why for me personally the right decision is pro-choice because you can choose for yourself. If you, your family, your partner, don't want to get an abortion, don't. If you feel like this is the only way for you, then do it. Of course this decision is not an easy one and there should be lot's of thought and support from professionals be involved to find a solution what is the best for the woman and her situation, but to make her get a baby she doesn't want, to make her give up her body, mental health and maybe even her relationships with family or partner is morally wrong to me. Abortions definitely shouldn't be taken lightly but sometimes they are necessary, when the fetus is not vital, when the mother's life is in danger or when it's a minor or an act of violence, the people should be able to make a decision for their life, their body and their health. And when they decide they have a big enough support system and they would be able to manage it, they can gladly keep the baby but if they don't have that privilege they shouldn't be forced because pregnancy and birth is definitely not nice for every single woman and if she doesn't want to go through that she shouldn't have to. Of course there should also be more education about safe sex and consent so woman don't get pregnant in the first place if they don't want a child, but I think IF they make a decision they get the professional help they need, whether it is support, or a safe abortion. It should also be taught that abortions is not a birth control and what it really means to make this decision and the trauma that will probably occur. I don't think anybody LIKES abortions or having to make that choice but for me America means Freedom and it's a privilege to be able to even choose for yourself what you want to do with YOUR life and that should be honoured. If it becomes illegal will only make it more unsafe for these women, because if they truly don't want it, they will find unsafe ways to do it, which is really dangerous. So a safe possibility should be provided. You never know what people go through and it's not my place to decide anything for anyone else than myself. It is not my business and especially not the politician's what women do with their bodies. In my opinion abortions won't stop with banning them but with educating about them, their consequences and their reasons. There has to be a better support system from the government if the woman is not able to support herself and her child if she wants to keep it but technically would not be able to. And until this is the case, where there is enough education and support it has to be a choice what you decide to do.
Just as genuine and comfortable in who he is as I had anticipated. Well done.
I honestly thoroughly enjoyed your conversation together! It’s so genuine and heartfelt! Please do more in the future!
Loved this!
We need a part 2 😍
Love you guys❤ So many good tips on long term relationships, I actually watched it with my partner (13y together) and he was into it...very relatable. Thanks so much, lovely episode🙏
Excelente! Me encantan Ellen y Andrew!🥰🙏🏻
MAKE ANDREW A REGULAR!!! I loved the episode, I was so excited for this one to drop.
Yes please, Andrew should be a regular. One of my favorite podcasts!
Soooo wonderful to listen to you. I wish you could make more Videos with your husband, your friends and sister. It is so more personal and shows your life and relationship. I take so much inspiration out of it. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Yes make this a regular thing!!!
I enjoy and appreciate all of your podcasts. I follow your tube channel for recipe inspiration. Your podcasts are where your passion and intellect shine! Your topics of varied topics are well presented with little bias. Thank you for sharing your interesting life.
Loved this podcast so much! Andrew is such a refreshing and admirable human being! You guys are such a beautiful couple! Been watching you guys and your beautiful family for years and it’s so nice to learn more about you guys! Much love ❤️
I even got emotional at the end. You guys are so lovely and well spoken. I love Andrew’s view of the world, a bit different to mine, but that’s why I find it sooo interesting. I’d love to hear more from both of you in future podcasts. I send you all my love from Spain ❤
You two have such a special relationship ❤
I really relate personality wise to Andrew, especially when he was talking about his childhood shyness, and how it is now as an adult lol.
Love hearing from Andrew.
You both are so wonderful!
Thank you for setting such a good example ♥
Great episode. I absolutely love Andrew ❤ ❤️❤️
My favorite episode yet!!! I could listen to you both all day too bad we cant have an open conversation LOL I love these kinds of conversations and how the tone is set❤
Loved your interview and it's been so useful and eye opening on many levels. I'm really inspired by your commitment, kindness to each other and others and how respectful and open minded you are. Thank you both 🥰
Love this episode ❤ especially the last bit of the conversation. You guys are so special.
thanks for all your support!
Yes!!! More Andrew!!!!
My partner and I met in highscool at 15-16, have been together ever since, and connected over instant messenger before we connected in person, he is also exactly the same for text messages 😂 I can so relate! Love that your story was similar
Loved having Andrew on! Yes, pls have him bk!
Thank you SO much for sharing this conversation, Ellen!! I'm recently married (just hit 6 months!) and it's so beautiful to see such a great example of a long-lasting, compassionate and engaging marriage. Very inspiring!
Oh my goodness, yes! Come to New Zealand! It is soooo beautiful here, especially the south island (I am from Christchurch) but even further south is amazing!
Also LOVED this video of you 2 together ❤️
Andrew is awesome and you both balance eachother so well! Id love to see him on the podcast more often 🙂
Definitely one of my favorite episodes. This was super encouraging. I’d love to see Andrew on as a regular and hear more about his faith, financial advice and how to be more present with your kids and family. Keep it up Ellen and Andrew! ❤
Loved this! Yes, more Andrew please!! My husband and I will be going to Maui (first time in Hawaii for both of us) in July. I will think of you guys -wondering which part of the island you live on. We can’t wait. Thanks for another great podcast-love your family ❤
Please bring him back!! I absolutely loved this episode:)
Amazing and I'm so excited for Erin's house 😁
Just want to add that I was very engaged with this episode because I’m really interested in the topic of not be lazy when it comes to please your partner over time and it’s so easy for people to forget that or get absolutely sloppy about themselves and the couple as 1. It was so useful! Like, I can see how you think and it make me have faith since nowadays everybody is getting divorced and breaking up. You are such an inspiration for me and my family!!
Also, it’s fun that Ellen is so conscious of what is said and tries to add some words sometimes so Andrew’s words don’t get misunderstood. Love your vibe 🫶🏼 it’s beautiful that you take care of each other. Thank you for sharing❤
Thanks for the video Ellen and Andrew. Regarding different opinions. I think that there is a fundamental difference between having or holding a certain opinion, and trying to enforce it on people that think differently.
And this is one of the main issues with politics and organised religion (it doesn't matter which one). My point of view has always been- live and let live. No one should dictate what is the best way to live your life. You need to get to decide what is important for you and what is your set of values.
Unfortunately, most establishments are trying to do the opposite, and social media makes it even more cruel, because people think they can hide behind their keyboards and just spray their thoughts without really dealing with the consequences.
This was great! I may not agree with everything but we're all meant to be so different. I appreciate Andrew sharing his experiences and thoughts 😊
I lol’d so hard at the sneezing convo. Great podcast!
This is a great podcast! Thank you, Ellen and Andrew! I’m curious - what are your myers Briggs personality types??
Fun episode! Ellen, do you edit your podcast or do you have an editor? Thanks!
Yes! The phone. I always have it on silent and my husband really doesn’t like that, either. And he also doesn’t do long texts. He prefers to talk, not write.
Youre a fantastic couple - a wonderful team.
I’m the same as y’all. I cannot leave the day messy. I MUST clean up everything before going to bed otherwise it truly doesn’t feel like a new day the next morning.
i love andrew so much
What a great episode, thank you both! Can mirror myself in my relation with my partner and our four kids, we are stay at home parents and dealing with alot of emotions right know so it was great tips you gave there...thank you again!!
wow so awesome im so glad you enjoyed it!
Enjoying this podcast while doing some weekly food prep…. Actually making vegan cheese sauce for the week- straight from Ellen’s recipe book! 🤗
This was thoroughly enjoyable.
This was so much fun! Thank you, Andrew, for coming on the podcast! You're such a wonderful husband and father -- it's a joy to watch you interact with your family 😊 And . . . thanks for wearing a shirt for the occasion. LOL!
Yes to Andrew becoming a regular!!!