Thank you Gaby! I'm a trans lesbian (as far as I've figured out), and TERFs are really scary for me. That shoot down you did of them so perfectly was something I desperately needed to hear
Thinking again about how cool kate is,,, I believe there is an alternate universe where I'm an all-pronouns bisexual lesbian, and that's why I'm obsessed w them
When people struggle say they/them Me being Filipino we don't use he or she in a sentence for example English - She's gonna buy a coffee (Translate to Filipino) Siya ay bibili ng kape. Siya means you or refer to that person Siya/Sila is gender neutral you can use that in a male or female conversation to someone but my country is still conservative. But i always watching to this podcast it makes me laugh thank you Ashley.
My native language (Portuguese) on the other hand is extremely gendered and there are no they equivalent that aren’t neopronouns 🥲I have absolutely no guts to ask ppl to refer to me with a neopronoun but in English I’ll use they for myself (and she too, but I wonder if I use she because I sort of have to in my native language so I can’t separate from it fully)
@@phosphenevision im a female at birth and i always get missed gender example when im in store to buy something or ordering a food online they always call me sir even tho i have long straight hair or maybe i wear men's clothes or maybe i don't wear make up having a thick eyebrows and big shoulder small tits and i dont shave yeah im kinda androgynous even tho i prefer "she" for pronounce but for me it's okay to call me any pronounce i dont easily get offended.
I know this is a old comment but I will still add to this lol. In my native language Finnish we have only one pronoun, hän. It isn’t gendered at all. Interestingly mostly in spoken language we use ”se” pronoun which translates to it. In casual language that is more comfortable but in formal written text it is considered incredibly rude. It’s as if you don’t acknowledge the person you are talking about as fully human or that they are so much bellow you that you don’t even give them consideration. This is in clash with our culture as elitist behaviour is looked down on. I must say that because of this I truly struggle with using it/its as preferred pronouns.
This is my obsession and my laughter session, I enjoy and love this podcast. Gaby was a great guest and so funny and cute and the this podcast was just hilarious and I couldn’t stop laughing all the way through this. Gaby also is so deep and thank you so much for this great podcast
I really wanna see Gabe back on the podcast to see about their journey. I literally just looked them up after this and was surprised to see how much their life changed
This is probably not the place for this, but I need some feedback wherever I can get it😅. I’m confused if I’m non-binary, internalizing misogyny (I’m AFAB), or a cis woman who likes playing with gender expression. I have gone by she/they for some months, very briefly they/them, and switched back to she/her recently. I dress somewhat androgynously (some have described my style as vegan, thrifty, cottagecore, comfy but stylish, not what you’d think of as feminine but not necessarily masculine either, and dressing more fem but acting more masc). I’m not “girly”. I don’t wear make up or have nails (except on random “I’m bored” occasions, but never foundation or anything heavy on my face). I don’t have long hair (green shoulder length shag atm but it’s always different). Something euphoric is the right length of armpit hair (~1/2 in.) and leg hair (~3/4”). I think mustaches are really cool and wish I could grow one sometimes or have one that looks real that I could take on and off. But not beards. As a kid, I was sometimes called a tomboy and idk if I really liked that term, just kinda was like 👍 but didn’t think THAT much of it. But “tomboy” wasn’t seen as central to my identity. An iconic outfit was plaid knee shorts, calf high boots, and a froyo shirt lol. I liked more adventurous things than my brothers. Liked stuffed animals, hated dolls. I “heard” Katy Perry wished for big boobs and it came true, so I did, and coincidentally, I now have big boobs 🤣. I was shameful of my period but not to the extent of AFAB trans ppls stories. But often times I wish I didn’t have boobs. Idk if it’s bc of the way ppl look at me and perceive me as woman and all the oppressive things that come with that, or because I want them off of my body and they don’t belong here. There was one time I looked at a mirror and really didn’t like my boobs, they weren’t mine. But other times I love my boobs, it’s so fun to bounce them while dancing/jumping (with a bra or else it hurts lol). I definitely don’t want a penis or to be a man tho. Tho sometimes I imagine my clit as a penis when I’m having sex with myself and remember we all originally have clits, but for some ppl they develop into penises as fetuses. Idk if that’s an interesting fact I think abt sometimes or there’s more to that. I also love messaging my boobs and nipple play, so 🤷🏼♀️. Sometimes I’ll use the androgynous emojis too. I love my vagina tho, I do feel there’s smth devine about it cause I’m spiritual like that lol. I’m body neutral for the most part, and believe energy is stored in the body sometimes. I try to treat my body well, be expressive, and nourishing to it. I do love women and femininity a lot (I’m a lesbian), and almost exclusively surround myself with women or non-binary ppl. I’ve generally always had many female friends and felt closer to the females in my life. I feel very passionate about womanhood, sisterhood, being lesbian, feminism, female empowerment, and feel seen in my experiences with sexism when talking about it with other AFAB ppl. I NEVER want to buy into the idea that being feminine is less than or something you should be ashamed or that it’s better to be like a man bc the worst thing you can be is a woman. I started introducing myself as Joot (a high school nickname) and it is more non-binary. And I really like that name and ppl think it suits me way better than “Jessica”. I feel more able if I ~were~ to say my pronouns are they/them or they/she or she/they with the more androgynous nickname Joot than with Jessica which seems much too feminine for a they pronoun. I just today started introducing myself as Joot tho. I often avoid thinking about gender bc it’s so confusing. I was just like I’m just gonna say she/her cause I think I just don’t like all the assumptions put on me by saying I’m a woman and would like to challenge those but idk if I’m actually non-binary. Plus, I don’t like correcting ppl, I don’t wanna invalidate ppl who are actually trans if I’m not, and thinking about it just seems like such a headache and a hassle I don’t wanna deal with if it isn’t necessary. (But tbh I do desire clarity.) In my ideal world, there is no gender and body parts are just different like we all have different hair colors. Everyone is equal. But that’s not the world we live in, and I can’t deny my experiences with sexism, being a woman/perceived as one. I’ve never been sexually assaulted or anything terrible but just make myself smaller and the microaggressions and assumptions are taxing. Thx if you made it this far lmaooo
Hey Joot! Just wanna reply as a cis lesbian to your story and provide some feedback. So, to me, it seems like you are still exploring what your gender expression means to you in daily life. And from the outside, I would guess that you are leaning more towards non-binary identification, but are struggling with the same issues most women deal with growing up female/perceived as female. For example, I am a cis woman, with large breasts, who grew up Catholic, and identified as a tomboy, so everything you talked about I connected with, from kinda hating have large boobs and wanting them smaller/cutting them off to feeling shame around my period. Only difference is that I did have the tomboy identity be super central to me lol (I was a really sporty girl). I think growing up so close to femininity, it’s easier to understand that struggle, as you view is closely/first-hand, but that could just mean you are a really good ally! You might just be pressuring yourself to fit into the womanhood box that aligns with being AFAB, unconsciously, instead of just freely exploring all types of gender expression that feels right to you. And I know this feeling very well, as I tried to deny my lesbianism for similar reasons (heteronormativity). I also think that it is okay to explore if trans is the right word for you, and that does not inherently deny the universal trans experience. It might be another mental block you are putting up to prevent yourself from seeing the real you (as again, I did the same thing by not wanting to label myself lesbian as I could be hurting "real lesbians" and I know that lesbians who then settle on being bi or vice versa struggle with this too). Questioning your gender, just like questioning your sexuality, is a totally valid place to be in, if that is who you are right now in this moment :) Also, the way you dress shouldn’t have to define your gender expression as well. This is kinda a big personal take of mine, as I am pretty confident in being a cis-woman, but I don’t wear skirts or dresses or wear makeup, just jeans and a sweatshirt (or shorts and an XXL t-shirt depending on the weather), because it’s comfy (and partly because it’s easier to avoid being stared at with the whole big boobs situation lol but that’s a different conversation), and I haven’t felt androgynous or trans. The most feminine thing I do is wear lip balm, shave, and wear my hair long. But, those things don’t define my femininity or me as a woman, as hetero cis men could do all these things too. At the end of the day, it is both an active choice (as gender is a social construct) and just a part of who I am (natural affiliation/orientation) to perform and identify with this gender, and that is what I think connects all women (yes trans women are include). And this similar alliance is what connects men with one another, and NBs with one another. But yeah, I hear you in how an ideal world wouldn’t have any gender, because it has honestly caused more harm than good. My philosophy class was just discussing this, like what makes something feminine or masculine, why is it defined this way, and especially who has the power to define it (which at the end of the day, is the root cause of all core issues - one group of people wanting power over another). So, overall, I think gendered clothes can help direct or enlighten people into knowing or discovering new and different gender expression, but it shouldn’t be the end all be all. Lastly, on your point about sex, some men enjoy wearing thongs and lace and having their nipples played with too! It isn’t just a woman thing. And it might just be harmless imagination with the clit/penis fantasy, so as an outside perspective I don’t think you have anything to worry about there. Hope this helps! And I am super happy to continue talking about this on here or somewhere else for a more live back and forth lol.
hi, im late to this, but i would say, dont worry about labels unless ofc you want to. just do what you feel makes you happy. labels are secondary to your happiness and imo, only to describe yourself to others. just do what makes sense to you.
5:53 my adhd axx be like let’s spend a few thousand dollars on cake decorating supplies then 1 week later be like well I’m done with this let me get a whole axx drum set because I want to learn how to play I mean there have been a few hobbies that I’ve kept lie, soccer and I actually learned how to speak Spanish over Covid lock down but that’s it. But daaaaammmmmm a whole axx year
Kate’s gender is the kid who falls asleep first at sleepover.
Carl Wheezer as Kate's gender took me the fuck _out,_ I love that so much
Thank you Gaby!
I'm a trans lesbian (as far as I've figured out), and TERFs are really scary for me. That shoot down you did of them so perfectly was something I desperately needed to hear
The great irony of TERFs is feminists were the first group to reject biological determinism. Now it's all they blather on about. They aren't feminists
Also a trans lesbian here, Gaby's little "speech" felt so validating.
aww Ashley wishing the best to that one trans woman patron made my day 🥺 so cute
Thinking again about how cool kate is,,, I believe there is an alternate universe where I'm an all-pronouns bisexual lesbian, and that's why I'm obsessed w them
You should definitely call Gabe to speak on this pod again
When people struggle say they/them
Me being Filipino we don't use he or she in a sentence for example
English - She's gonna buy a coffee
(Translate to Filipino)
Siya ay bibili ng kape.
Siya means you or refer to that person
Siya/Sila is gender neutral you can use that in a male or female conversation to someone
but my country is still conservative. But i always watching to this podcast it makes me laugh thank you Ashley.
The thing about it is that there are many genders in that culture and the fact that language cannot represent them is very sad
My native language (Portuguese) on the other hand is extremely gendered and there are no they equivalent that aren’t neopronouns 🥲I have absolutely no guts to ask ppl to refer to me with a neopronoun but in English I’ll use they for myself (and she too, but I wonder if I use she because I sort of have to in my native language so I can’t separate from it fully)
@@phosphenevision im a female at birth and i always get missed gender example when im in store to buy something or ordering a food online they always call me sir even tho i have long straight hair
or maybe i wear men's clothes or maybe i don't wear make up having a thick eyebrows and big shoulder small tits and i dont shave yeah im kinda androgynous even tho i prefer "she" for pronounce but for me it's okay to call me any pronounce i dont easily get offended.
I know this is a old comment but I will still add to this lol.
In my native language Finnish we have only one pronoun, hän. It isn’t gendered at all. Interestingly mostly in spoken language we use ”se” pronoun which translates to it. In casual language that is more comfortable but in formal written text it is considered incredibly rude. It’s as if you don’t acknowledge the person you are talking about as fully human or that they are so much bellow you that you don’t even give them consideration. This is in clash with our culture as elitist behaviour is looked down on. I must say that because of this I truly struggle with using it/its as preferred pronouns.
Gaby holding the pen throughout gives me major therapist vibes.
Michael's is the gay craft store and every day I become more sure of this fact.
What time do you go because every time I go I feel like I’m about to go home and cry over a man 🤢
OMG Kate has always the best stories! Gold!
so basically while kate is a fantastic cancel coach, gaby is an amazing referee
that subtle product placement tho... masterpiece
Can you have Gaby do the pod again, I absolutely loved the energy they brought! Bring them back!
Omg Kate Sisk starring in Gender Crashers 😍
Kate was a great cohost. Love this blast from the past with Gabe. Wild how relevant the references are
I love when Kate and Ashley’s laugh sync up perfectly
The horse puns are taking me out. 😂
Kate always has amazing stories, every week i know i'm in for a ride lol
This is my obsession and my laughter session, I enjoy and love this podcast. Gaby was a great guest and so funny and cute and the this podcast was just hilarious and I couldn’t stop laughing all the way through this. Gaby also is so deep and thank you so much for this great podcast
I relate to having so many equipment for hobbies I did for months at most 😂
Havent watched yet, just came to say that I have the shirt Kate is wearing. It's a good shirt. 🌱
Best story ever Kate! Really does sound like a Romcom scene, I would totally pay good money to watch that in a theater. 😆😂🤣
I really wanna see Gabe back on the podcast to see about their journey. I literally just looked them up after this and was surprised to see how much their life changed
I laughed so much at this episode, it's a fav!
Kate's gender is Hamilton "Ham" Porter's (The Sandlot), younger, funnier, sweeter little brother. Good god, Kate has a brilliant smile 😍
Kate's story was epic!
I’m the same with my hobbies!! I rotate! I’ve learn so many things like that! lol
Btw I love surfing!
I see Gaby, I click..
This is probably not the place for this, but I need some feedback wherever I can get it😅. I’m confused if I’m non-binary, internalizing misogyny (I’m AFAB), or a cis woman who likes playing with gender expression. I have gone by she/they for some months, very briefly they/them, and switched back to she/her recently. I dress somewhat androgynously (some have described my style as vegan, thrifty, cottagecore, comfy but stylish, not what you’d think of as feminine but not necessarily masculine either, and dressing more fem but acting more masc). I’m not “girly”. I don’t wear make up or have nails (except on random “I’m bored” occasions, but never foundation or anything heavy on my face). I don’t have long hair (green shoulder length shag atm but it’s always different). Something euphoric is the right length of armpit hair (~1/2 in.) and leg hair (~3/4”). I think mustaches are really cool and wish I could grow one sometimes or have one that looks real that I could take on and off. But not beards. As a kid, I was sometimes called a tomboy and idk if I really liked that term, just kinda was like 👍 but didn’t think THAT much of it. But “tomboy” wasn’t seen as central to my identity. An iconic outfit was plaid knee shorts, calf high boots, and a froyo shirt lol. I liked more adventurous things than my brothers. Liked stuffed animals, hated dolls. I “heard” Katy Perry wished for big boobs and it came true, so I did, and coincidentally, I now have big boobs 🤣. I was shameful of my period but not to the extent of AFAB trans ppls stories. But often times I wish I didn’t have boobs. Idk if it’s bc of the way ppl look at me and perceive me as woman and all the oppressive things that come with that, or because I want them off of my body and they don’t belong here. There was one time I looked at a mirror and really didn’t like my boobs, they weren’t mine. But other times I love my boobs, it’s so fun to bounce them while dancing/jumping (with a bra or else it hurts lol). I definitely don’t want a penis or to be a man tho. Tho sometimes I imagine my clit as a penis when I’m having sex with myself and remember we all originally have clits, but for some ppl they develop into penises as fetuses. Idk if that’s an interesting fact I think abt sometimes or there’s more to that. I also love messaging my boobs and nipple play, so 🤷🏼♀️. Sometimes I’ll use the androgynous emojis too. I love my vagina tho, I do feel there’s smth devine about it cause I’m spiritual like that lol. I’m body neutral for the most part, and believe energy is stored in the body sometimes. I try to treat my body well, be expressive, and nourishing to it. I do love women and femininity a lot (I’m a lesbian), and almost exclusively surround myself with women or non-binary ppl. I’ve generally always had many female friends and felt closer to the females in my life. I feel very passionate about womanhood, sisterhood, being lesbian, feminism, female empowerment, and feel seen in my experiences with sexism when talking about it with other AFAB ppl. I NEVER want to buy into the idea that being feminine is less than or something you should be ashamed or that it’s better to be like a man bc the worst thing you can be is a woman. I started introducing myself as Joot (a high school nickname) and it is more non-binary. And I really like that name and ppl think it suits me way better than “Jessica”. I feel more able if I ~were~ to say my pronouns are they/them or they/she or she/they with the more androgynous nickname Joot than with Jessica which seems much too feminine for a they pronoun. I just today started introducing myself as Joot tho. I often avoid thinking about gender bc it’s so confusing. I was just like I’m just gonna say she/her cause I think I just don’t like all the assumptions put on me by saying I’m a woman and would like to challenge those but idk if I’m actually non-binary. Plus, I don’t like correcting ppl, I don’t wanna invalidate ppl who are actually trans if I’m not, and thinking about it just seems like such a headache and a hassle I don’t wanna deal with if it isn’t necessary. (But tbh I do desire clarity.) In my ideal world, there is no gender and body parts are just different like we all have different hair colors. Everyone is equal. But that’s not the world we live in, and I can’t deny my experiences with sexism, being a woman/perceived as one. I’ve never been sexually assaulted or anything terrible but just make myself smaller and the microaggressions and assumptions are taxing. Thx if you made it this far lmaooo
Hey Joot! Just wanna reply as a cis lesbian to your story and provide some feedback. So, to me, it seems like you are still exploring what your gender expression means to you in daily life. And from the outside, I would guess that you are leaning more towards non-binary identification, but are struggling with the same issues most women deal with growing up female/perceived as female. For example, I am a cis woman, with large breasts, who grew up Catholic, and identified as a tomboy, so everything you talked about I connected with, from kinda hating have large boobs and wanting them smaller/cutting them off to feeling shame around my period. Only difference is that I did have the tomboy identity be super central to me lol (I was a really sporty girl). I think growing up so close to femininity, it’s easier to understand that struggle, as you view is closely/first-hand, but that could just mean you are a really good ally! You might just be pressuring yourself to fit into the womanhood box that aligns with being AFAB, unconsciously, instead of just freely exploring all types of gender expression that feels right to you. And I know this feeling very well, as I tried to deny my lesbianism for similar reasons (heteronormativity).
I also think that it is okay to explore if trans is the right word for you, and that does not inherently deny the universal trans experience. It might be another mental block you are putting up to prevent yourself from seeing the real you (as again, I did the same thing by not wanting to label myself lesbian as I could be hurting "real lesbians" and I know that lesbians who then settle on being bi or vice versa struggle with this too). Questioning your gender, just like questioning your sexuality, is a totally valid place to be in, if that is who you are right now in this moment :)
Also, the way you dress shouldn’t have to define your gender expression as well. This is kinda a big personal take of mine, as I am pretty confident in being a cis-woman, but I don’t wear skirts or dresses or wear makeup, just jeans and a sweatshirt (or shorts and an XXL t-shirt depending on the weather), because it’s comfy (and partly because it’s easier to avoid being stared at with the whole big boobs situation lol but that’s a different conversation), and I haven’t felt androgynous or trans. The most feminine thing I do is wear lip balm, shave, and wear my hair long. But, those things don’t define my femininity or me as a woman, as hetero cis men could do all these things too. At the end of the day, it is both an active choice (as gender is a social construct) and just a part of who I am (natural affiliation/orientation) to perform and identify with this gender, and that is what I think connects all women (yes trans women are include). And this similar alliance is what connects men with one another, and NBs with one another. But yeah, I hear you in how an ideal world wouldn’t have any gender, because it has honestly caused more harm than good. My philosophy class was just discussing this, like what makes something feminine or masculine, why is it defined this way, and especially who has the power to define it (which at the end of the day, is the root cause of all core issues - one group of people wanting power over another).
So, overall, I think gendered clothes can help direct or enlighten people into knowing or discovering new and different gender expression, but it shouldn’t be the end all be all.
Lastly, on your point about sex, some men enjoy wearing thongs and lace and having their nipples played with too! It isn’t just a woman thing. And it might just be harmless imagination with the clit/penis fantasy, so as an outside perspective I don’t think you have anything to worry about there.
Hope this helps! And I am super happy to continue talking about this on here or somewhere else for a more live back and forth lol.
hi, im late to this, but i would say, dont worry about labels unless ofc you want to. just do what you feel makes you happy. labels are secondary to your happiness and imo, only to describe yourself to others. just do what makes sense to you.
Another great episode and so funny 😃😘
I love Gaby
Would love to see Gabe being invited again
This made me miss my American relatives so much
Ahahaha i keep the oil on the bottom shelf
5:53 my adhd axx be like let’s spend a few thousand dollars on cake decorating supplies then 1 week later be like well I’m done with this let me get a whole axx drum set because I want to learn how to play I mean there have been a few hobbies that I’ve kept lie, soccer and I actually learned how to speak Spanish over Covid lock down but that’s it. But daaaaammmmmm a whole axx year
I love your ads 😂
worlds colliding! hilarious as always.
👏👏👏 Gaby Dunn!!
you should get polyphiliablog to come on and talk non monogamy sometime! shes great
You have to be one, in order to realize how true the affirmation is.
Gaby looook exactly like a Gemini
Clicked on this thinking it was PenguinZ0
Yess❤
I've never heard "trans lesbian" said aloud so many times before and I am one 🥲
Same. :)
i'm sorry bt i can never refer to kate as kate anymore. SISKO JUST MAKES SENSE OK
yes the bicon is here
instafollowed them!!
Kates gender gives me very much Boy Scouts uniform
Did you forget abt the thumbnail this time??!?!
😎😃😊😜😍😘💖
Also let’s freaking gooo Aquarius lmao does anyone know if they are a January Aquarius or February
And now she’s marrying one! Lol
YAYYYY! :3
Gemini gang
xx
This video had 69 comments until I got here. Sorry for ruining it.
I just matched with jen on tinder
Nooo😂
stop!!
How do you feel about horses? (And Helix mattresses?)
Trans reboot of wedding crashers