This was far more relatable then any song I’ve heard in a very very long time. I was always one of those overly good girls, parents would try to convince they’re kids to be my friend because I was a good influence. By age 16 I had never actually done anything to warrant being heavily punished by my parents but I was always the punching bag for my parents, siblings and others teenagers and it had been that way for as long as I could remember. The “worst” thing I did was not being able to keep up with making ice, my family loves ice a lot and will freak out if there isn’t any, it was summer and I just couldn’t make it quickly enough so my mother grounded me for 2 years. I was such a good kid, actually looking back I was the perfect kid, I never even asked for food, I stayed quiet and did what I was told, I was too scared of everyone and everything I kept myself isolated from everybody, it was a very very sad life but I was always told if I was good then I would have good things come to me eventually. Years and years of wondering when would something come to me to give me some sort of hope, and by age 16 I did have some very close friends but they all died that year within a couple months of each other, I thought they were the thing I had been waiting for and they were taken from me so brutally. I lost all hope and I started changing quickly. I lost weight and I mean a lot of it, I wasn’t over weight anymore and I ended up with what people consider the perfect body, I cut my own hair and dyed it and I became popular within the blink of an eye, I wanted that admiration and praise to fill that void that was left by my friends deaths, of course that never worked but the popularity was intoxicating, I was far more beautiful then anyone thought I could be, most people didn’t even recognize me and it felt like such sweet revenge to see the faces of those who hurt me try desperately to get me to notice them, the desperation and fear they had, if I didn’t like them others would follow and shun them too, guy’s were always asking me out and following me like lost puppies and I loved every second. I’m 22 now, I moved out the day after I turned 18, I was successful for a fresh 18 year old girl without a high school diploma, I got a job paying me 6,000$ a month I’m the tech industry, I turned a lot of heads as a women who had that internet beauty, the kind you only see on instagram and I was amazing at my job and got promoted immediately after my bosses boss saw my handy work. I was thriving, or at least that’s what everyone thought. I only had that self centered mindset for about 2 years, I let myself have it because I had wanted to know what it felt like but I still have a soft heart no matter what, it’s the hardest thing for me to hurt anyone in anyway, I wanted to make everyone genuinely happy. I switched back my personality when I got the job and worked there for a bit, well more like that old “personality” melted away quickly. I built a better relationship with my siblings and repaired things with my parents, I made new friends at my job but I still couldn’t find myself being as close or open as I was with my old friends and I just couldn’t let anyone in like that anymore. I worked 13 hour shifts and went with some friends on break and they all smoked and they said it gives you some energy so I tried, it did and ever since I’ve been smoking, it’s absolutely unimaginable, I hated the thought all my life and my parents did it and that made me hate it more, I hated the smell and thought it was absurdly disgusting and I’d never in a million years even considered it. I also started drinking next thing I knew I was never really at my apartment anyway because I didn’t want to be alone. I moved back to my home city and my relationship with my parents and sister grew stronger and stronger, my sister begged me to move in with her and at one point her significant other lost his job and for a whole year I gave her 100% of my paychecks and used only the tips I got for working at a bar, I wasn’t allowed most tips so I probably had around 50$ a week to use. Then next thing I knew she told me she was pregnant and since they didn’t want me to move out for a couple years I could just lend them my savings for the baby, I had almost 3,000$ and a month later she said she changed her mind and said there wasn’t enough room and she said I had to be moved out within a month, the date she set was my birthday. She knew my boss since we actually worked at the same place and she always made sure to go and get my check before I could and tell my boss to write it in her name and he didn’t think anything of it cause she said I was switching banks so she was going to send it when I got my new one set up. I couldn’t say anything to him as I didn’t want to involve outsiders into our family issues or for it to effect our work, but everyone got suspicious and basically knew what was happening because my sister said things here and there and customers and employees pieced it together and asked 2 days before I had to leave if they’re guests was right or not. But my boss was obviously and had no idea what was happening. She made me homeless in the end, all the family tried warning me she would do this and even so they decided to take her side so they could be in the babies life and I honestly understand but it hurts. I’m 22 now and not sure who I want to be anymore, I like doing good things but it’s only brought me complete and total destruction, when I was bitchy and confident I got everything I wanted and I was for the most part content with what I had other then being lonely, but I’ve always been lonely. I have absolutely no one and nothing, I don’t have real friends only those who use me to climb to the top, I was also never loved enough by my family for them to choose me, now I seek satisfaction and comfort in nicotine and alcohol more then I used to. I look back at the youth I wasted being such a good girl and regret it so much, I should have gone to parties, snuck out, dated, gone to prom, I should have kept going for my dream of being on the swim team and kept my hobby of roller skating for countless hours, I should have worked on my art and dancing instead of doing everything and anything everyone wanted me to instead of what I wanted. I was going to be abused either way so I should have done it all because it wouldn’t have changed anything like I thought it would. I’ve literally watched my life die and wither away, I can’t stop my comforting bad habits because it’s my only comfort now, it’s all I have.
First of all, your naive people won't change because you thought they would. And you're only running from your problems. You can be kind to people but not to the point where they would take advantage of you. always put boundaries because if you scenario will repeat it self it. doesn't if they are family or friends cut them out of your life if they hurt you and don't drown your self with nicotine and alcohol it's pathetic if I'm being honest next time look at your self in the mirror and you'll say to your self is that me? (I don't know if what I'm saying makes sense or not, english isn't my first language, but I hope this helps)
@@Jallad209 i understand what your saying. I actually came to the realization a couple weeks ago that it’s naive and stupid of me to expect anyone to change. I thought I could use the one thing I thought I was naturally good at to change people. I should have just found new better people and stop clinging to this fantasy idea I had of a good family, and social life. In the end it’s really just my own fault for letting others use me and not having boundaries. I was also incredibly stupid because I pushed away the one person who stuck with me for the past 6 years, I was in love with him but due to my pathetic insecurities I thought he wouldn’t ever feel the same and I didn’t want to get too attached and accidentally slip, I was so stupid and dense I didn’t even realize he confessed he loved me until recently, I looked at our text and due to accidentally getting too drunk I drunk text him and somehow the conversation ended up with him telling me “I love you” and he specifically said “I love you, more deeply then a friend” I’ve now been thinking about contacting him, I live very far now but I think we both at least need closer. You are absolutely right though, my use of nicotine and alcohol is absolutely pathetic and I haven’t drunk in almost a month now, nicotine has been a bit harder for me though, I bought some vapes for my plan of easing myself off it, what I have is all I will ever have again at least that’s my intention and it’s been working for the most part. Btw I would like to say thank you, you put it harshly but not in a malicious way and I actually think that works best on me, I’ve mentioned it but I can be dense and things tend to go right over my head if it’s not said bluntly and simple.
@Al i don't know what to say. I just wanna say i hope the best for you and your future and that I believe with my whole heart in you and im sure that good things will happen. From now on you will be part of prayers and hopefully sooner that you thing you'll get the happy life you derserve. PS: don't believe you're alone, they are always people by your side, maybe not as much as we want them to be but they are. And if not them, god stands by your side
There's no escaping... when you watch your life die in front of you.... and everyone you love goes against you... what do I do? what can I do? Arigatou gozaimashita (thanks for sharing) 🌺
Hey, something in me is Missing and it's making me miserable inside and it projecting out side leaving me empty...is everyone okay here, if not 😔 sorry idk what to do anymore...I feel like I should just relax but I can't...Aum *sigh* I'm tired of empty days and lonely nights on more so I'm tired of sleeping alone & feeling lifeless my insides are full of life I feel it but I can't project or express it because the deeper inside is lonely leaving me dead emotionally.
You and me both buddy, I have no idea what the hell I’m supposed to do now, I’m 22 and I feel like I’m stuck at 15, I’m doing all the stuff I said I would never ever do like smoking but it helps with the loneliness, if I get up to smoke outside then I don’t think about how I’m alone in my apartment, no friends or family, I’m on the balcony as I watch others live they’re life and I don’t feel so alone in that moment and when I see others doing the same kinda feels like we’re all out there together as a group. It’s weird as hell but I can’t find what’s missing so I have absolutely no idea what else to do anymore 🤷🏻♀️
i've been lost on and island afraid for days had a whole life in my hands and threw it away i wish i could told my self in that moment it could get better it cant last forever i tried that cigarette it was gonna be my first and my last time but i didn't stop and slowly my heart started to pop just one turned to two and quickly a pack before i knew it my mind started to crack and there is no escaping no theres no escaping what do you do when u watch your life die infront of you. what do u do. when everyone u love goes against u what do i do started out innocent lost control and freaked got all my friends telling me that im not me i cant stopp no i cant stopp 1 year 2 years 10 years pass. tey to stop thousand times i never last try to make it out alive but i cant cant make it out alive what do you do when u watch die in front you what do you do when everyone u love goes against u what do i do what can i do what do i do when i watch my life die infront you me what do i do when everyone i love goes against me what do i do what do i do what can i do what do i do what do i do what do i do! what do you do when u watch your life die infront of you what do u do when everyone u love goes against u. what do i do?? what do i do?? what do i do what can i do what do i do what do i do what do i do? what do i do what can i do,
나는 며칠 동안 섬에서 길을 잃었고 평생을 내 손에 쥐고 그것을 버렸다. 나는 그 순간에 나 자신에게 말할 수 있었으면 좋겠다. 그것이 영원히 지속될 수는 없다. 나는 그 담배를 시도했다 그것이 나의 첫 번째가 될 것입니다 그리고 내 마지막 시간이지만 나는 멈추지 않았고 천천히 내 심장이 터지기 시작했습니다. 당신의 인생이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 지켜보십시오. 당신은 무엇을 해요. 당신이 사랑하는 모든 사람이 당신에게 반대할 때 내가 무엇을 해야 할까요? 순진한 통제력을 잃고 겁에 질려 모든 친구들이 저에게 메신저가 아니라 멈출 수 없다고 말했습니다. 1년 2년 10년이 지났습니다. 천 번을 멈추고 살아 남기 위해 마지막으로 시도한 적이 없지만 살아서 만들 수는 없습니다. 당신이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 볼 때 당신은 무엇을합니까? 당신은 당신이 사랑하는 모든 사람이 당신에게 반대 할 때 무엇을합니까? 내 인생이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 볼 때 내가 할 일 ! 당신의 인생이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 볼 때 당신은 무엇을합니까 당신이 사랑하는 모든 사람이 당신을 반대 할 때 당신은 무엇을합니까. 나는 무엇을합니까?? 나는 무엇을합니까?? 내가 무엇을 할 수 있습니까 무엇을 할 수 있습니까? 내가 할 수 있는 일, 내가 할 수 있는 일
Thank you so much for posting my song!! 💙💙💙💙
💜💜
Your Voice is amazing✨
When I watch my life die in front of me 💜
First
❤️
Time to accept it 😌 😃
❤️
🖤
so true this song shows how quickly and fast the Life in front of you can change in an blink of an eye and awesome song by the way good job ruby
Yeah you got point there it can feel like changed in 1 minute but hasn't
Holy smokes, what a BANGER
👌💜
this song's tittle is how i feel everywhere i go even at home with my family
This was far more relatable then any song I’ve heard in a very very long time.
I was always one of those overly good girls, parents would try to convince they’re kids to be my friend because I was a good influence. By age 16 I had never actually done anything to warrant being heavily punished by my parents but I was always the punching bag for my parents, siblings and others teenagers and it had been that way for as long as I could remember.
The “worst” thing I did was not being able to keep up with making ice, my family loves ice a lot and will freak out if there isn’t any, it was summer and I just couldn’t make it quickly enough so my mother grounded me for 2 years.
I was such a good kid, actually looking back I was the perfect kid, I never even asked for food, I stayed quiet and did what I was told, I was too scared of everyone and everything I kept myself isolated from everybody, it was a very very sad life but I was always told if I was good then I would have good things come to me eventually.
Years and years of wondering when would something come to me to give me some sort of hope, and by age 16 I did have some very close friends but they all died that year within a couple months of each other, I thought they were the thing I had been waiting for and they were taken from me so brutally. I lost all hope and I started changing quickly.
I lost weight and I mean a lot of it, I wasn’t over weight anymore and I ended up with what people consider the perfect body, I cut my own hair and dyed it and I became popular within the blink of an eye, I wanted that admiration and praise to fill that void that was left by my friends deaths, of course that never worked but the popularity was intoxicating, I was far more beautiful then anyone thought I could be, most people didn’t even recognize me and it felt like such sweet revenge to see the faces of those who hurt me try desperately to get me to notice them, the desperation and fear they had, if I didn’t like them others would follow and shun them too, guy’s were always asking me out and following me like lost puppies and I loved every second.
I’m 22 now, I moved out the day after I turned 18, I was successful for a fresh 18 year old girl without a high school diploma, I got a job paying me 6,000$ a month I’m the tech industry, I turned a lot of heads as a women who had that internet beauty, the kind you only see on instagram and I was amazing at my job and got promoted immediately after my bosses boss saw my handy work. I was thriving, or at least that’s what everyone thought.
I only had that self centered mindset for about 2 years, I let myself have it because I had wanted to know what it felt like but I still have a soft heart no matter what, it’s the hardest thing for me to hurt anyone in anyway, I wanted to make everyone genuinely happy.
I switched back my personality when I got the job and worked there for a bit, well more like that old “personality” melted away quickly. I built a better relationship with my siblings and repaired things with my parents, I made new friends at my job but I still couldn’t find myself being as close or open as I was with my old friends and I just couldn’t let anyone in like that anymore.
I worked 13 hour shifts and went with some friends on break and they all smoked and they said it gives you some energy so I tried, it did and ever since I’ve been smoking, it’s absolutely unimaginable, I hated the thought all my life and my parents did it and that made me hate it more, I hated the smell and thought it was absurdly disgusting and I’d never in a million years even considered it.
I also started drinking next thing I knew I was never really at my apartment anyway because I didn’t want to be alone. I moved back to my home city and my relationship with my parents and sister grew stronger and stronger, my sister begged me to move in with her and at one point her significant other lost his job and for a whole year I gave her 100% of my paychecks and used only the tips I got for working at a bar, I wasn’t allowed most tips so I probably had around 50$ a week to use. Then next thing I knew she told me she was pregnant and since they didn’t want me to move out for a couple years I could just lend them my savings for the baby, I had almost 3,000$ and a month later she said she changed her mind and said there wasn’t enough room and she said I had to be moved out within a month, the date she set was my birthday.
She knew my boss since we actually worked at the same place and she always made sure to go and get my check before I could and tell my boss to write it in her name and he didn’t think anything of it cause she said I was switching banks so she was going to send it when I got my new one set up. I couldn’t say anything to him as I didn’t want to involve outsiders into our family issues or for it to effect our work, but everyone got suspicious and basically knew what was happening because my sister said things here and there and customers and employees pieced it together and asked 2 days before I had to leave if they’re guests was right or not.
But my boss was obviously and had no idea what was happening. She made me homeless in the end, all the family tried warning me she would do this and even so they decided to take her side so they could be in the babies life and I honestly understand but it hurts.
I’m 22 now and not sure who I want to be anymore, I like doing good things but it’s only brought me complete and total destruction, when I was bitchy and confident I got everything I wanted and I was for the most part content with what I had other then being lonely, but I’ve always been lonely.
I have absolutely no one and nothing, I don’t have real friends only those who use me to climb to the top, I was also never loved enough by my family for them to choose me, now I seek satisfaction and comfort in nicotine and alcohol more then I used to.
I look back at the youth I wasted being such a good girl and regret it so much, I should have gone to parties, snuck out, dated, gone to prom, I should have kept going for my dream of being on the swim team and kept my hobby of roller skating for countless hours, I should have worked on my art and dancing instead of doing everything and anything everyone wanted me to instead of what I wanted. I was going to be abused either way so I should have done it all because it wouldn’t have changed anything like I thought it would.
I’ve literally watched my life die and wither away, I can’t stop my comforting bad habits because it’s my only comfort now, it’s all I have.
First of all, your naive people won't change because you thought they would. And you're only running from your problems. You can be kind to people but not to the point where they would take advantage of you. always put boundaries because if you scenario will repeat it self it. doesn't if they are family or friends cut them out of your life if they hurt you and don't drown your self with nicotine and alcohol it's pathetic if I'm being honest next time look at your self in the mirror and you'll say to your self is that me? (I don't know if what I'm saying makes sense or not, english isn't my first language, but I hope this helps)
@@Jallad209 i understand what your saying.
I actually came to the realization a couple weeks ago that it’s naive and stupid of me to expect anyone to change. I thought I could use the one thing I thought I was naturally good at to change people.
I should have just found new better people and stop clinging to this fantasy idea I had of a good family, and social life. In the end it’s really just my own fault for letting others use me and not having boundaries.
I was also incredibly stupid because I pushed away the one person who stuck with me for the past 6 years, I was in love with him but due to my pathetic insecurities I thought he wouldn’t ever feel the same and I didn’t want to get too attached and accidentally slip, I was so stupid and dense I didn’t even realize he confessed he loved me until recently, I looked at our text and due to accidentally getting too drunk I drunk text him and somehow the conversation ended up with him telling me “I love you” and he specifically said “I love you, more deeply then a friend” I’ve now been thinking about contacting him, I live very far now but I think we both at least need closer.
You are absolutely right though, my use of nicotine and alcohol is absolutely pathetic and I haven’t drunk in almost a month now, nicotine has been a bit harder for me though, I bought some vapes for my plan of easing myself off it, what I have is all I will ever have again at least that’s my intention and it’s been working for the most part.
Btw I would like to say thank you, you put it harshly but not in a malicious way and I actually think that works best on me, I’ve mentioned it but I can be dense and things tend to go right over my head if it’s not said bluntly and simple.
@Al i don't know what to say. I just wanna say i hope the best for you and your future and that I believe with my whole heart in you and im sure that good things will happen. From now on you will be part of prayers and hopefully sooner that you thing you'll get the happy life you derserve.
PS: don't believe you're alone, they are always people by your side, maybe not as much as we want them to be but they are. And if not them, god stands by your side
Good music, very cute and beautiful art, good work!)💖💖💖
Such an amazing vibe to it tho. Honestly i think this might be my favorite one this month
Ayyy 💜
@@RubyChansNightcore ,
💖💖💖
True!! Feels so weird but amazing idk
Superb nightcore mate ❤️
Yay 💜
Amazing work Robin 💜
Thanks 💜
Really amazing video 😄😍✌️
True ! All vids amazing fr
Love the art style
💜
Nice nightcore 💓💓💓
Great nightcore video this is deep and depressing. ☹️💀💀☠️☠️
Sounds soo cool 🤩🔥
💜
Cool 😎🤩😎🤩😎good keep up the amazing work
💜
Relates to me and amazing!
I love it!
💜
Outcast hehe :3
Lovely, Robin-chan ^^ 💙💙
Yay 💜
@@RubyChansNightcore 💜💜
Awesome ❤️
Yay 💜
@@RubyChansNightcore ❤️🤩
Fuuuck its beautiful
^^
Incredible
Early 🤩
Yash 💜
AweSome 😍
LoVe ✨ThIs MaStErPiEcE✨
There's no escaping...
when you watch your life die in front of you....
and everyone you love goes against you...
what do I do?
what can I do?
Arigatou gozaimashita (thanks for sharing) 🌺
^^ 💜
@@RubyChansNightcore
Your song makes the soul tremble ...
もう一度、ありがとう (Thanks again)🌺
First ❤️
💜
Nice.^^
💜
i L ove it ❤
Awesome 🧡💚🤍🖤🤎
Feels ⭐💯
Best best best ever. Our tragedy
💜
Really nice song
It sounds so sad. Do they feel okay...?
Hopefully :c
Mmmm she's so gorgeous ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
💜
❤🖤
💜
👍
Hey, something in me is Missing and it's making me miserable inside and it projecting out side leaving me empty...is everyone okay here, if not 😔 sorry idk what to do anymore...I feel like I should just relax but I can't...Aum *sigh* I'm tired of empty days and lonely nights on more so I'm tired of sleeping alone & feeling lifeless my insides are full of life I feel it but I can't project or express it because the deeper inside is lonely leaving me dead emotionally.
Yeah.. I hope you will get that pain all the things you feel and goes away it won't be easier God will help you.bless you dear! 🙏
You and me both buddy, I have no idea what the hell I’m supposed to do now, I’m 22 and I feel like I’m stuck at 15, I’m doing all the stuff I said I would never ever do like smoking but it helps with the loneliness, if I get up to smoke outside then I don’t think about how I’m alone in my apartment, no friends or family, I’m on the balcony as I watch others live they’re life and I don’t feel so alone in that moment and when I see others doing the same kinda feels like we’re all out there together as a group. It’s weird as hell but I can’t find what’s missing so I have absolutely no idea what else to do anymore 🤷🏻♀️
This song describes what is happening to my life rn
If you play back speed to 1.25x, I think it sounds even better. Try it lmk 👍🏼
y u m o
For everyone for wahts the lyrics spelled out in comments.
👎 check the replys
i've been lost on and island afraid for days had a whole life in my hands and threw it away i wish i could told my self in that moment it could get better it cant last forever i tried that cigarette it was gonna be my first and my last time but i didn't stop and slowly my heart started to pop just one turned to two and quickly a pack before i knew it my mind started to crack and there is no escaping no theres no escaping what do you do when u watch your life die infront of you. what do u do. when everyone u love goes against u what do i do started out innocent lost control and freaked got all my friends telling me that im not me i cant stopp no i cant stopp 1 year 2 years 10 years pass. tey to stop thousand times i never last try to make it out alive but i cant cant make it out alive what do you do when u watch die in front you what do you do when everyone u love goes against u what do i do what can i do what do i do when i watch my life die infront you me what do i do when everyone i love goes against me what do i do what do i do what can i do what do i do what do i do what do i do! what do you do when u watch your life die infront of you what do u do when everyone u love goes against u. what do i do?? what do i do?? what do i do what can i do what do i do what do i do what do i do? what do i do what can i do,
Korean one ---->
나는 며칠 동안 섬에서 길을 잃었고 평생을 내 손에 쥐고 그것을 버렸다. 나는 그 순간에 나 자신에게 말할 수 있었으면 좋겠다. 그것이 영원히 지속될 수는 없다. 나는 그 담배를 시도했다 그것이 나의 첫 번째가 될 것입니다 그리고 내 마지막 시간이지만 나는 멈추지 않았고 천천히 내 심장이 터지기 시작했습니다. 당신의 인생이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 지켜보십시오. 당신은 무엇을 해요. 당신이 사랑하는 모든 사람이 당신에게 반대할 때 내가 무엇을 해야 할까요? 순진한 통제력을 잃고 겁에 질려 모든 친구들이 저에게 메신저가 아니라 멈출 수 없다고 말했습니다. 1년 2년 10년이 지났습니다. 천 번을 멈추고 살아 남기 위해 마지막으로 시도한 적이 없지만 살아서 만들 수는 없습니다. 당신이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 볼 때 당신은 무엇을합니까? 당신은 당신이 사랑하는 모든 사람이 당신에게 반대 할 때 무엇을합니까? 내 인생이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 볼 때 내가 할 일 ! 당신의 인생이 당신 앞에서 죽는 것을 볼 때 당신은 무엇을합니까 당신이 사랑하는 모든 사람이 당신을 반대 할 때 당신은 무엇을합니까. 나는 무엇을합니까?? 나는 무엇을합니까?? 내가 무엇을 할 수 있습니까 무엇을 할 수 있습니까? 내가 할 수 있는 일, 내가 할 수 있는 일
I resent that song
First 💚😁
Yay 💜
@@RubyChansNightcore 💚my day is not good today my right arm hurts