This song helped me to beat my panic disorder. When he says “‘Let’s go!” That was my starting gun in the morning when I started running. The feeling this song gave me got me into running because I couldn’t express the feeling it was giving me without playing it on a rhythm game or dancing really experimentally. So I would run and would envision myself exploding from the inside out like a bomb with a kind of focused fury and then reshaping myself through sheer will and adrenaline rush. I would run to this song and picture the anxiety coming in from every angle with every snare drum in that crescendo at the end. This was the ‘final attack’. But ‘I would block every attack. Every time the music rises it was the panic coming for me and I had to choose between flight or...fight. With this song it felt like I could overwhelm almost anything through mental determination. I began to run, I quit doing drugs, started exercising, lost 65 pounds, and basically am now getting my life together. This song gave me strength. Thank you so much Blacky. Also USAO, C-Show, and Maozon put out a ton of great music during this time and it helped me invaluably.
In esoteric Buddhism they call this Mantrayana or Tantric Buddhism. Which means ascribing transcendent power to symbolism or “art”. Another mantrayana that I use is a Chinese elm bonsai tree that I take care of. I often sit and observe it very carefully and languidly as a kind of meditative repose. I spend my anxious thought energy into envisioning it in all its details. Every branch, every gnarl, every leaf. The roots that seek. The twisting and turning toil of its life. Then if you exhaust that, you start to envision yourself from outside of yourself and as the bonsai. He takes care of me. He waters me. He shelters me from too much sun. He carries me from room to backyard carefully. He plucks my dead leaves and keeps me fresh. He cures me from sickness. He knows just how much water to give me because he touches my soil and feels it. Basically to become the tree. If you continue this practice you begin to identify yourself from an outside perspective and lose the ego structure. If you continue after that, you will begin to identify yourself as everything else. Then after that you will identify yourself as everything. Which is freeing because you no longer feel contained in this seemingly finite form..
![Camellia - Λzure Vixen [From CHUNITHM]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/tbTClz7caXg/mqdefault.jpg)
![Camellia - Λzure Vixen [From CHUNITHM]](/img/tr.png)
GOD I LOVE THIS.
This song helped me to beat my panic disorder. When he says “‘Let’s go!” That was my starting gun in the morning when I started running. The feeling this song gave me got me into running because I couldn’t express the feeling it was giving me without playing it on a rhythm game or dancing really experimentally. So I would run and would envision myself exploding from the inside out like a bomb with a kind of focused fury and then reshaping myself through sheer will and adrenaline rush. I would run to this song and picture the anxiety coming in from every angle with every snare drum in that crescendo at the end. This was the ‘final attack’.
But ‘I would block every attack. Every time the music rises it was the panic coming for me and I had to choose between flight or...fight.
With this song it felt like I could overwhelm almost anything through mental determination. I began to run, I quit doing drugs, started exercising, lost 65 pounds, and basically am now getting my life together. This song gave me strength. Thank you so much Blacky. Also USAO, C-Show, and Maozon put out a ton of great music during this time and it helped me invaluably.
nice
@@FrostMonolith Lmao he just wrote an essay of panic disorder and you just said
yeah "nice"
this shit beautiful
In esoteric Buddhism they call this Mantrayana or Tantric Buddhism. Which means ascribing transcendent power to symbolism or “art”. Another mantrayana that I use is a Chinese elm bonsai tree that I take care of. I often sit and observe it very carefully and languidly as a kind of meditative repose. I spend my anxious thought energy into envisioning it in all its details. Every branch, every gnarl, every leaf. The roots that seek. The twisting and turning toil of its life. Then if you exhaust that, you start to envision yourself from outside of yourself and as the bonsai. He takes care of me. He waters me. He shelters me from too much sun. He carries me from room to backyard carefully. He plucks my dead leaves and keeps me fresh. He cures me from sickness. He knows just how much water to give me because he touches my soil and feels it. Basically to become the tree.
If you continue this practice you begin to identify yourself from an outside perspective and lose the ego structure. If you continue after that, you will begin to identify yourself as everything else. Then after that you will identify yourself as everything. Which is freeing because you no longer feel contained in this seemingly finite form..
Blacky is music therapist❤❤❤
god god
WAF 와프 godgod