Hello, to clarify a few things: 1. Many people seem to feel I was throwing shade at Pewdiepie. Putting aside the fact that I don't know what "throwing shade" is, I was not trying to reference any particular person. I was trying to make the point that all TH-camrs (including us!) at times try to present themselves as Davids in David and Goliath stories. I think it's interesting that everyone assumed I was referencing one particular TH-camr, but I wasn't. I was trying to throw shade at a system, not at an individual. (Did I use that phrase correctly?) Also, 2. Several people have asked what exactly the fuel was that replaced resentment. It was the hope that I might be able to make something that would be useful to people, or important to them, the hope that I might be able to write a book that could be a consolation to people in the way that certain books had been deeply important consolations to me when I was young. Now, there was still plenty of ego involved in that hope--as a friend once told me, you've gotta be a certain kind of person to walk into a bookstore and think, like, "What this place needs is another book." But yeah, that is the motivation (when it works). It does not burn as brightly, but it's warmer. Lastly, this is just me. I do not intend for this video to describe all creative processes. Much of my favorite work was fueled at least in part by resentment, like for instance Taylor Swift's song "Blank Space," for instance. -John
I think there's a pretty clear reason that everyone assumed you were talking about Pewdiepie. The list of channels with subscriber numbers that high is approximately 2 names long, and T-Series is a large group of people rather than just one.
Well pewdiepie is a youtuber with 70 million-ish subscribers with incredible influence who still finds ways to see himself as oppressed by "the media" so honestly I think some shade has been rightfully thrown, even if unintentionally.
@@benjesterw um.. no? His TH-cam Red series was cancelled. Disney broke off contracts with him. He lost all of his mainstream brand sponsorships. Giant mainstream brands still don't work with PewDiePie because the media has created him into a controversial figure. All because his name in the headline gets clicks
Know what else is garbage fuel to burn? Guilt. Working because you feel guilty *not* working does not produce anything good. Later edit: Thanks for all the ++! "Work" was meant specifically in response to the sense that John was talking about... That is, creative endeavors. I know that working for money or grades or not-losing-your-job sometimes will be fueled by guilt, and getting *something* done is better than getting nothing done in those cases. But still, my coursework in college didn't inspire me, and guilt was probably the only fuel I could run on to power most of my assignments. Pretty sure that's why I was a B student instead of an A student, though!
I'm going to disagree with a word-choice used above. If your energy inputs don't produce anything, then it's not work but waste. Work produces output which somebody must be predicting is useful for some _good._ Edit: Damn this is sounding too philosophical, more so than was intended when my first thought was just: _Of all the management classes on motivational techniques driving employee productivity, all of them assume that work input goes towards some kind of good output, but that the payoff of efficient quality work eventually goes down after excessive reliance on the application of any one single motivational technique. Like all economics underpinning basic business classes, there's an optimal supply-curve_
I took a break from writing my PhD thesis to watch this video and it was really helpful. Even if it was only 4:00, this helped me remember that what I really want is to show people how cool the findings are-- not how clever I can be. Thank you. You've given me something to look out for as I review the drafts and keep in mind as I continue to write.
I give you credit, my friend. I've just dropped out of my PhD because I couldn't handle the environment and I just wasn't happy in academia or research anymore.
I appreciate that. The environment is definitely trying and it's a shame that it grinds down on so many people that they quit. We loose so many good ideas that way. I hope you're happier in your new pursuits and that you eventually rekindle your love of research-- hopefully in a venue that makes you feel happy and valued.
OMG John. I have been watching these vlogs on and off for a couple years and I had NO IDEA you were THAT John Green. Looking for alaska is my favorite non-fantasy book. I respect you and I think you are an amazing author
2:43 This quote really stuck out to me... It shows that writing or any sort of creative process takes time and in order for it to grow, I need to grow.
Last night I deleted my social media, and what I realized is that I almost had a resentment toward myself because of those apps. I did not let myself live or enjoy my life. In 7 days time, seeing that I spent 2 full days on my phone really hit me hard. I’ve already noticed a large difference in how I live and treat myself. My mind isn’t swimming with “what’s this person doing, is this something I can send to my streaks?” But rather, I am in the moment and I am engaging with others. I don’t feel bad for myself anymore, and as I enter my second semester of college, this is a relieving feeling. Now I seek communication, not attention, and I am so grateful for this.
I've had the same experience, ... TH-cam video's now usually take most of my phone time ( and most of it is educational at least) , social media a few times a week max of 5 min...
michalovesanime it’s been months since I’ve binge-watched TH-cam. The only channel I religiously follow now is the vlogbrothers. But I understand where you’re coming from. I’m forcing myself to stay away from social media (snapchat, instagram, Facebook) for a minimum of a month, but if I find true improvement, I’ll keep them gone for the semester. Allowing myself to feel bored (it’s syllabus week, there’s nothing really to do right now) is a strange feeling and something John hinted at in one of his recent videos, and although I’m not used to it, I love that I’m not mindlessly liking Instagram pictures and so forth. Now I’m finding myself doing things I “didn’t have time for” last semester: reading, drawing, and for me personally and most importantly, strengthening my faith. Best of luck to you! DFTBA! :)
czdaniel1 I love watching soccer! I played for years but never was very good😂 but that’s even my point too- I never made time to support my university’s athletic teams, even though I wanted to. But yes. Puppies. Puppies are wonderful, and watching puppies play soccer is A+ satisfaction.
At I glance, I thought the title was, “On Burning the Basement” and I just accepted that as John expressing his feelings through destroying his basement
I wanted to comment: “I love you, John Green” which was how I felt after watching this video. But then I decided that was lame. So I clicked away, then I decided it was double lame not to say it so I came back. I’m 33. The end.
"The smithy of my soul" is a lovely, resonant metaphor for me because you can take it so many places--not just in what are you burning, but ... what are you making? What raw matter are you taking, and forging, and bending, and making anew?
That you for being so open about seeing yourself as an underdog rather than seeing your advantages. That is so much a part of growing, which we're all still doing (hopefully) even after we have grown up.
Videos like this make me realize how far vlogbrothers, and myself, have come. I generally prefer the older vlogbrothers videos but this video made me realise that perhaps that's merely because I long for a time when I, and therefore my world, was more simple. I like this video. I like this channel. We have grown with it, and it has grown with us.
I just had a presentation about „the fault in our stars“ and about you John!! My teacher was inspired by you and my whole class too. So greetings from switzerland 👋🏼🇨🇭
I am currently a 23 year old aspiring writer, and I have spent the last year and a half grinding myself to bits on project after dead-end project with the fuel of resentment. It's been a long time since I've much liked one of your videos, John, but today, this is helping. Thanks.
I feel like I haven't found what keeps my fire burning yet. It is reassuring to hear that I'm not the only one and it's okay not to have figured it out yet. One should just not give up.
Gabby H. I feel you!! I feel like the only fuel I have is fear of failure and all this conversation has encouraged me to try to find something a little less soul-crushing with which to fuel myself :)
I started with Crash Course, found vlogbrothers, read three of your books, listened to some "dear hank and John", now the last two days I've binged Anthro. I didn't think I could like you more, but Anthro is my favorite. It's nice to know there are people like me out there. You have made me like myself a little more. Thank-you John.
What you said about how the narrator of Looking For Alaska can look hard at everyone else in the novel except for himself is such an excellent way to reconsider a debut novel. I never thought of it that way before, and it’s a great writing tip.
John, it's like you have a window into my soul and can just sense what I'm feeling right now!!! You always seem to have a pertinent message to whatever current situation I'm going through, and I thank you for that.
John: "We're looking for someone.." Me: Oh! J: "So if you're uncommonly organized.." Me: MEEEE J: "..and are fine with calling strangers on the phone.." Me: NEVERMINDDDDD
it was a gift. I first read Looking for Alaska after a bad break-up and just the general topic of loss and how you can get past that "gone" person, really helped me.
From tumors to splintered nerves my fire has been fueled by, “seeking a great, perhaps.” But this video kind of raises a call to action on giving up the great, and letting your motivation lye within the seeking. It’s hard to be honest with yourself, that damn book quote has kept me going through a lot. Maybe it’s time I look to stepping away from what I know, and toward the unsteady waters of what could be. Thanks John, your videos remind me that even though I hate yelling at the captain on the boat, it beats just waiting to hit the iceberg.
I love that John is super honest about his flaws. Like he had harmful ways of thinking when he was younger but he put effort into learning and evolving and doing good with what he learned- goals
I leave all of your videos with a feeling of hope, and it never ceases to amaze me how you and Hank are able to get your ideas and thoughts across so eloquently. You both have been mentors for me throughout high school, and I just wanted to say thank you for all that you do. From inspiring words to silly inside jokes, all of it makes an impact. I aspire to be as self-aware and concious of my ability to make a change in the world as you and Hank are. Also HUGE fan of Looking For Alaska and all of your other books!!! Thanks again!
John, your constant ability to evolve and ponder yourself, your own path and the world around you will never cease to amaze me. I love your books because of it. But I don't think you've reached your best yet. It's beautiful that after all of your success, you can still put it all in perspective, you can detach yourself without aggrandizing yourself. Your critical and self-aware point of view is and will keep maturating. Thank you for sharing this journey!
I'm always waiting for Tuesdays and Fridays. There's a certain vibe to your videos that cheer me up. Whether they deal with important topics, they are plainly funny or even kind of sad. These video always motivate and help when I feel like I'm drowning in bad thoughts again. Thank you so much for your videos :)
Understanding how and why we burn may be one of the most important things we can do. I am guilty of burning out and using a lot fuel that is unstable, but being able to better understand that I can’t do that all the time has helped me to realize how to not burn out so often. As a society I believe we have an unhealthy relationship with work, and we value the late nights and burn out. Taking time to realize in yourself how to prevent that and take care of yourself is such an important step in the process. Thank you for these wonderful videos about something that’s been on my mind recently.
Hope this question isn't too broad: In the end, did you find that it was cultivating an external focus that just worked as better fuel for creating, by making for others first, yourself second? In other words, was it just a healthier frame of reference when motivating yourself and creating? Or did that introspection help you grow, and THEN you shared the upgraded product from the upgraded you with people, which kept you aloft since? Basically: outward progress validated internally, or internal progress validated externally? Thanks!
The external focus is the fuel. The idea of making something for people that might be useful to them, or that might be a consolation to them, is the fuel that works for me. It burns slowly, and not as bright as resentment or fear or loathing or whatever, but it's the only way that works for me. (That said, much of my favorite work has been fueled at least in part by resentment; see, for instance, Taylor Swift's song "Bad Blood." So I'm not saying there's only one right way!) -John
@@vlogbrothers Thanks for responding! I think slow cookers are a great metaphor here: either whip together a quick meal to eat by yourself, or you take the care and let something simmer, and share it when it's done. Long story short, I hope life gives plenty of opportunities to prep some slow cookers :)
I don’t know why but I’ve really started to enjoy the Good morning Hank it’s Tuesday from you. I realize it’s a small part of your videos but since it’s such a calm and seemingly collected phrase you always seem to pull me out of the real world into the much richer and exiting world of nerdfiteria. Thank you for allowing me to be grabbed out of my normal life.
Hey, John. I’m from Pelham, AL, and I really appreciated your geographical accuracy in Looking for Alaska. As simple as that may sound, I felt more connected to the setting and narrative because of it. I actually had a friend transfer to Indian Springs for high school after reading the book! We’d love to have you back in town sometime 💛
feeling a lot of resentment these days. that may be my main feeling of the past couple of years at college, actually. Thanks for being open and honest about yours, John
I love the "more light than heat" line, especially recalling that that bit specifically was one of your potential titles for Paper Towns. Paper Towns is the perfect title for the book, but man, "more light than heat" sure is a beautiful set of words.
The hope that you so clearly have and fight for is really inspiring. This video meant a lot to me and I appreciate it. Thanks John On a related side note: the content coming from this channel has really been helping me through a very rough time in my life. John and Hank: I appreciate your honest and often deep and insightful content. You do good work. Thank you.
I've just finished reading Turtles All the Way Down, and I'm really starting to appreciate the cleverness of single lines that you write or say. "Burning in the smithy of my soul" is one such line. I love your use of language, and hope to continue enjoying your books, videos, podcasts and anything else you produce!
John, *this video* was a most brilliant and welcome of revelations from you. Thank you so much for sharing! It pins a tail on the stubborn donkey I rode on my own journey with resentment. Decades of seeing the impact of heartless corporate cultures on myself and my coworkers drove me to _try_ and start a consulting company with the massively "altruistic" goal of pointing companies in the direction of productive empathy. I never got it off the ground. It hit me in a fit of depression that the my so-called altruism was being fueled by resent, not by authentic connection (the hidden fury of resentment isn't exactly the best way to win over clients). And the resentment _still_ simmers, even today, but I've found other connections in other places in my life. Better, healthier, and more productive and fun connections. I'll get back to helping corporate culture eventually, but on my own terms, not on the terms of my resentment donkey. Thanks again for sharing the power to be vulnerable.
Resentment is one way of phrasing that sentiment. I often refer to it as "one-upping" others. It fuels my workouts in the morning at 5am... Ultimately, I have to remind myself that many of the things I do as a teacher (event planning, coordinating committees, supervising clubs, etc), serve a greater purpose and has nothing to do with me (or padding a resume). That one-uppmanship becomes a dedication to student life and school spirit...and that is a far greater motivator for anything I do. Knowing that what I involve myself in will generate so much positive energy is amazing.
This one really connected with me. I too have done things just to spite the "haters" as if they actually cared what I was doing. I was just doing them for myself. Great video John
To go fast, go alone. To go far, go together. I'm not the center of the Universe and I wouldn't even be where I am without so much what has gotten me here. Gratitude fuel is my favorite, and helping people. Also defining myself as a contribution to help serve so much around me, because it's not all about me and sometimes I feel that I owe people and the Universe before me to live a joyful, present, and valuable life of caring. Thanks, John.
I needed to hear this today got admit I haven’t check in awhile. Yet I was thinking how much I have to work. Cause what has taken me years and perseverance has been given to some people by just being related. Yet I remind myself my resentment only limits me and damages my own self image. Let it go and continue what you need to do for your own path.
Oh my God why did I need this so terribly? I’m sitting here in the midst of a first draft novel wondering why I am not strung in the bones with words of Pulitzer Prize winners and Oscar Wilde thoughts when really I shouldn’t care if my books are successful or not. It’s not about the thing, it’s about the journey on the way to that thing. Thank you John.
I‘m glad that you revisited this topic because I was struggling a little with the fuel metaphor after Hank’s video, but the more you guys talk about it the better I understand it. I really liked the conversation that Hank and Katherine had about good vs. bad fuel this week on Delete This too.
and you have just quietly motivated me at the EXACT (note currently eating a delicious but pity based burrito) moment I needed some. writing as a gift to others. such a simple yet important concept. Thank you for improving my undergrad dissertation before I've even begun writing.
This is oddly applicable to my life right now. I get preoccupied with being mad about previously being screwed over by people that I am still stuck in close proximity to until this June. I can't really talk to them about it in any meaningful way about being frustrated or just straight up mad, because of power dynamics. The energy from being resentful kinda petered out a while ago though, and now it's just the drive to get things done so I change my circumstances in a few months.
John, I really really really love your words. I have a VERY difficult time picturing things when I read which has rendered so much of the literary world so arduous and stories so full of holes that books are often nonsensical to me. But your words somehow always resonate for me. I can picture the world you verbalize very completely. Probably because you tend to the purpose in your writing and your verbal essays with such care that no word is superfluous. They all point to your purpose. And it's a beautiful one.
Thank you for this John. The video hit just at the right time. I was just thinking that the human capacity for self-pity is truely endless. Thank you for reminding me that that's normal.
Just echoing the comments that I am really enjoying your guys' videos lately and your perspective on things. I think it is a difficult time of year for a lot of people so we all could use some insight. :) love you bros.
I find myself doing things out of spite sometimes and it's mixed in results. Like, growing up, no one was telling me I deserved things (often, people were saying boys deserved more than me) so I was driven to prove myself in every aspect of my life just to be noticed. This baby feminist determination transformed into adulthood persistence, which is good, but it can be a little too much sometimes, because I often am disappointed in myself when I can't do enough and leads to some imposter syndrome. Working for what you want and not falling for toxic crappy feelings is a hard process to learn.
Id' say the drive to prove one's worth to the people around you is basic human survival instinct, not baby feminism. But everything else you write is well communicated truth
Have you read A Room of One’s Own? You may find it encouraging. She talks a little about resentment creeping into women’s writings because of the environment we grow up in. And the barriers women faced throughout history to be writers. But ultimately, it ends up being so hopeful. I think it can apply to more that women writing or making, but also doing and being the things we want to do and be. Maybe apply to more people than solely women.
So two things I think most of my late teens and early twenties ran on resentment so this resonated. I listen to Dear Hank and John when I run and I just finished the episode from January 7th and I'm dying over the fact that there were Olive Garden commercials during this video.
Those are some BEAUTIFUL cards that I've definitely never seen before. What a talented artist this Sharon person must be! I wonder if she's made anything else that is also available on DFTBA your friendly neighborhood e-tailer.
I really appreciate this because it feels like I'm at that stage in my life where I'm actually trying to stop doing things as an f u to other people, but rather just for myself, and its good to know that I'm on the right track ♡ Thanks John
I once tried to write novels and poems out of resentment, but they honestly weren't very good. I found that they were always flat. The best work I think create is when I just want to be heard and be vulnerable. What drives my work is the absolute desire to be real. I feel that if I can be real one the page, then someone reading it can feel real too.
That tracks, I didn’t love looking for Alaska, but I did love your later books like turtles all the way down and it’s because of the more balanced perspective of the later main characters. That’s good though, your work has evolved with you and it’s getting better and so are you
"A document of my attempted cleverness," dear god that sounds familiar. I was never one for resentment but early 20's me fell into the other hole for a long while and deep. I still have to struggle with that impulse but I can now resist that urge. With effort.
I used to watch your crash course videos and I liked them a lot. I agree a lot with your idea of resentment. I’m 20 years old and atheist, and knowing a little too much about this world makes us feel tiny and incapable. Therefore this sort of depression and resentment start to appear and it really consumes people. Your simple words really enlighten me some bit even though I still cannot fully understand them. Those conclusions take years of experience to produce, but thanks!
I turned 25 a few months ago and I have no idea what I'm doing with my career or life while my friends are getting married and buying freaking houses which has led to many a freakouts in the year 2019. In short, I had no idea how much I needed this video until I watched it which is how I feel about most vlogbrothers videos.
when i see him move somewhere else when it cuts i just imagine him saying "link down in the dublidoo' and just slowly scootching over thinking of what he wants to say next.
This video and some comments have helped me realize: I think I have been depressed and unproductive because when I try to find fuel to *do* the things, all I focus on is the guilt around *not* doing the things. That's an internal, negative fuel, and it goes out like a candle in the slightest of winds. I should try to redirect my focus onto my goals of helping the world--an external, positive fuel.
Sure, I regret the mistakes I've made, but I regret the time I wasted on resentment the most. Eventually, I learned from my mistakes. When dancing with resentment you never know whether to lead, or follow. This was a great vlog. Great lesson.
There are a lot of really combustible fuels that we use to drive the engine of our lives. It's hard to dump the tank out and start over. It feels like you're getting rid of something you invested in and that's wasteful. I'm in the process of emptying the tank this year--hopefully over time I will burn cleaner.
I used blind rage as fuel to write my very best story. It's good, and I'm really proud of it. Alas, however, even if justified, that sort of rage just can't last, and now that I'm once again content, I have no creative writing left in me. Which is fine. I'll leave that up to you.
I don't celebrate Valentine's Day but oh my goodness those cards are adorable. And I really enjoy the poetic and, I guess, the philosophical manner of speaking John has. He can talk about the dumbest things and be hilarious and a second later he's deep and eloquent.
Effective but toxic. I need to tell that phrase to my son, and keep it in mind for myself. We try so hard to do so much and end up poisoning ourselves with our own efforts - he and I both. Then, when the anxiety and depression wash over us and crush us, we both blame ourselves and get sucked right down to the bottom of it all, almost without a gasp of protest. It's hard to break that cycle, but maybe this kind of thinking can help. Anything that helps, in any amount, is desperately needed - by most of us, I think.
A good video to watch when I’ve been working on my novel all day. I like that you call that draft the novel that would turn into LfA. I hope that one day this draft will turn into something too. I started it because I felt there was a lack in the literary world and I wanted to fill it. I want this story to be there for the people who see that hole the way I did. Hopefully that’s enough for it to become something.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE UPSET THAT I DON'T LIVE IN INDIANAPOLIS!!! She said from her cozy Canadian office while studying Indigenous language revitalization which has nothing at all to do with this job. HOW AMAZING WOULD IT BE TO WORK FOR JOHN AND THE YETTI THOUGH. OH MAH GOURD!!
Those are definitely excellent valentines that I ordered as soon as I could! Don't have a valentine? Me either! (Unless you count my cat which is debatable depending on her mood) BUT HAVE YOU SEEN HOW CUTE THESE CARDS ARE?? Nerdfighter Sharon is talented indeed.
Looking for Alaska is your best work in my opinion. Looking forward for the series. Can't wait to see them all how other people imagined them and compare them to my imagination. Cool that you talked about it 4 days after her anniversary (she died on January 11. About 4 am...) Best wishes from Germany😘🌼 PS: A wall sucks. One parted Germany once and many people died or suffered terrybly...
Hello, to clarify a few things: 1. Many people seem to feel I was throwing shade at Pewdiepie. Putting aside the fact that I don't know what "throwing shade" is, I was not trying to reference any particular person. I was trying to make the point that all TH-camrs (including us!) at times try to present themselves as Davids in David and Goliath stories. I think it's interesting that everyone assumed I was referencing one particular TH-camr, but I wasn't. I was trying to throw shade at a system, not at an individual. (Did I use that phrase correctly?)
Also, 2. Several people have asked what exactly the fuel was that replaced resentment. It was the hope that I might be able to make something that would be useful to people, or important to them, the hope that I might be able to write a book that could be a consolation to people in the way that certain books had been deeply important consolations to me when I was young. Now, there was still plenty of ego involved in that hope--as a friend once told me, you've gotta be a certain kind of person to walk into a bookstore and think, like, "What this place needs is another book." But yeah, that is the motivation (when it works). It does not burn as brightly, but it's warmer.
Lastly, this is just me. I do not intend for this video to describe all creative processes. Much of my favorite work was fueled at least in part by resentment, like for instance Taylor Swift's song "Blank Space," for instance. -John
I think there's a pretty clear reason that everyone assumed you were talking about Pewdiepie. The list of channels with subscriber numbers that high is approximately 2 names long, and T-Series is a large group of people rather than just one.
Well pewdiepie is a youtuber with 70 million-ish subscribers with incredible influence who still finds ways to see himself as oppressed by "the media" so honestly I think some shade has been rightfully thrown, even if unintentionally.
@@JayRodsVideos also, 81 mil😂✊
Perfectly right to call out pewdiepie since his career hasnt been hit at all really, even if the particular pieces from the WSJ werent accurate.
@@benjesterw um.. no? His TH-cam Red series was cancelled. Disney broke off contracts with him. He lost all of his mainstream brand sponsorships.
Giant mainstream brands still don't work with PewDiePie because the media has created him into a controversial figure. All because his name in the headline gets clicks
HAAAAA THISSSSSS how dare you spill these intimate embarrassing feelings I thought were my own only
dodie
"The human capacity for self pity is truly endless" -John Green, 2019
Truer word have never been spoken
Describes the impulse for every new meme ever.
@@Javjean oml totally
Know what else is garbage fuel to burn? Guilt. Working because you feel guilty *not* working does not produce anything good.
Later edit: Thanks for all the ++!
"Work" was meant specifically in response to the sense that John was talking about... That is, creative endeavors. I know that working for money or grades or not-losing-your-job sometimes will be fueled by guilt, and getting *something* done is better than getting nothing done in those cases. But still, my coursework in college didn't inspire me, and guilt was probably the only fuel I could run on to power most of my assignments. Pretty sure that's why I was a B student instead of an A student, though!
+++
++++
Story of my life I am so damn exhausted
I'm going to disagree with a word-choice used above.
If your energy inputs don't produce anything, then it's not work but waste.
Work produces output which somebody must be predicting is useful for some _good._
Edit: Damn this is sounding too philosophical, more so than was intended when my first thought was just: _Of all the management classes on motivational techniques driving employee productivity, all of them assume that work input goes towards some kind of good output, but that the payoff of efficient quality work eventually goes down after excessive reliance on the application of any one single motivational technique. Like all economics underpinning basic business classes, there's an optimal supply-curve_
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I took a break from writing my PhD thesis to watch this video and it was really helpful. Even if it was only 4:00, this helped me remember that what I really want is to show people how cool the findings are-- not how clever I can be. Thank you. You've given me something to look out for as I review the drafts and keep in mind as I continue to write.
I give you credit, my friend. I've just dropped out of my PhD because I couldn't handle the environment and I just wasn't happy in academia or research anymore.
I appreciate that. The environment is definitely trying and it's a shame that it grinds down on so many people that they quit. We loose so many good ideas that way. I hope you're happier in your new pursuits and that you eventually rekindle your love of research-- hopefully in a venue that makes you feel happy and valued.
@@ProfessorPolitics I do hope so, but its a little doubtful since I'm a chemistry major. Going to have to rethink the rest of my life 😂
Good luck to both of you, in your individual pursuits 💛
I had to check the username to make sure I didn't write this comment.
OMG John. I have been watching these vlogs on and off for a couple years and I had NO IDEA you were THAT John Green. Looking for alaska is my favorite non-fantasy book. I respect you and I think you are an amazing author
People find out about him and john green is THAT john green never gets old or boring. It's amazing.
this is so cute
There are so many John Greens in the world.
@ITS ALL IN MIND yes!! 😂
I love it when people find out this .d.d.d.d. it's a very cute moment .d.d.d.d.
vlogbrothers videos have become my daily ritual after school, and you guys always bring me something insightful, intelligent, and uplifting. thank you
What are you gonna do when you run out?
daydodog start over
Welcome :) have helped/enriched me since 2010
VlogBrothers videos lately have been KILLER. Love your guy's perspective on all of these topics. Thanks you & dftba
John thank you for the wise words. You remind me that working hard isn’t as important as working hard *for the right reasons*
oof! i watched this twice in a row. felt your words deep in my soul's smithy
2:43 This quote really stuck out to me... It shows that writing or any sort of creative process takes time and in order for it to grow, I need to grow.
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I read this in Johns voice before I had even gotten to this part of the video.
Last night I deleted my social media, and what I realized is that I almost had a resentment toward myself because of those apps. I did not let myself live or enjoy my life. In 7 days time, seeing that I spent 2 full days on my phone really hit me hard. I’ve already noticed a large difference in how I live and treat myself. My mind isn’t swimming with “what’s this person doing, is this something I can send to my streaks?” But rather, I am in the moment and I am engaging with others. I don’t feel bad for myself anymore, and as I enter my second semester of college, this is a relieving feeling. Now I seek communication, not attention, and I am so grateful for this.
I've had the same experience, ... TH-cam video's now usually take most of my phone time ( and most of it is educational at least) , social media a few times a week max of 5 min...
Awesome! Keep at it!
Soccer + Puppies can improve peoples lives 10,000,000 times better than social media.
_Note: soccer + puppies can actually be surprisingly expensive!_
michalovesanime it’s been months since I’ve binge-watched TH-cam. The only channel I religiously follow now is the vlogbrothers. But I understand where you’re coming from. I’m forcing myself to stay away from social media (snapchat, instagram, Facebook) for a minimum of a month, but if I find true improvement, I’ll keep them gone for the semester. Allowing myself to feel bored (it’s syllabus week, there’s nothing really to do right now) is a strange feeling and something John hinted at in one of his recent videos, and although I’m not used to it, I love that I’m not mindlessly liking Instagram pictures and so forth. Now I’m finding myself doing things I “didn’t have time for” last semester: reading, drawing, and for me personally and most importantly, strengthening my faith. Best of luck to you! DFTBA! :)
czdaniel1 I love watching soccer! I played for years but never was very good😂 but that’s even my point too- I never made time to support my university’s athletic teams, even though I wanted to. But yes. Puppies. Puppies are wonderful, and watching puppies play soccer is A+ satisfaction.
At I glance, I thought the title was, “On Burning the Basement” and I just accepted that as John expressing his feelings through destroying his basement
It's a new form of art he's creating.
"...it's tempting to turn the basement into a metaphor."
Strange Compliment: I admire your ability to turn modest statements into potential book synopses
Sometimes I feel jealous of John. Until I realize that the world is lucky to have people like him.
I wanted to comment: “I love you, John Green” which was how I felt after watching this video. But then I decided that was lame. So I clicked away, then I decided it was double lame not to say it so I came back. I’m 33. The end.
This could not have arrived at a better time for me; thank you john!
"The smithy of my soul" is a lovely, resonant metaphor for me because you can take it so many places--not just in what are you burning, but ... what are you making? What raw matter are you taking, and forging, and bending, and making anew?
That you for being so open about seeing yourself as an underdog rather than seeing your advantages. That is so much a part of growing, which we're all still doing (hopefully) even after we have grown up.
Videos like this make me realize how far vlogbrothers, and myself, have come. I generally prefer the older vlogbrothers videos but this video made me realise that perhaps that's merely because I long for a time when I, and therefore my world, was more simple. I like this video. I like this channel. We have grown with it, and it has grown with us.
I just had a presentation about „the fault in our stars“ and about you John!!
My teacher was inspired by you and my whole class too.
So greetings from switzerland 👋🏼🇨🇭
I am currently a 23 year old aspiring writer, and I have spent the last year and a half grinding myself to bits on project after dead-end project with the fuel of resentment. It's been a long time since I've much liked one of your videos, John, but today, this is helping. Thanks.
I feel like I haven't found what keeps my fire burning yet. It is reassuring to hear that I'm not the only one and it's okay not to have figured it out yet. One should just not give up.
Gabby H. I feel you!! I feel like the only fuel I have is fear of failure and all this conversation has encouraged me to try to find something a little less soul-crushing with which to fuel myself :)
I loved your comment. I feel like everyone feels that way sometimes.
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I started with Crash Course, found vlogbrothers, read three of your books, listened to some "dear hank and John", now the last two days I've binged Anthro. I didn't think I could like you more, but Anthro is my favorite. It's nice to know there are people like me out there. You have made me like myself a little more. Thank-you John.
The TH-cam algorithm is recommending me this video 5 years later, but it's so relatable.
Honestly, this is probably the best corner of the Internet.
What you said about how the narrator of Looking For Alaska can look hard at everyone else in the novel except for himself is such an excellent way to reconsider a debut novel.
I never thought of it that way before, and it’s a great writing tip.
John, it's like you have a window into my soul and can just sense what I'm feeling right now!!! You always seem to have a pertinent message to whatever current situation I'm going through, and I thank you for that.
John: "We're looking for someone.."
Me: Oh!
J: "So if you're uncommonly organized.."
Me: MEEEE
J: "..and are fine with calling strangers on the phone.."
Me: NEVERMINDDDDD
it was a gift. I first read Looking for Alaska after a bad break-up and just the general topic of loss and how you can get past that "gone" person, really helped me.
From tumors to splintered nerves my fire has been fueled by, “seeking a great, perhaps.” But this video kind of raises a call to action on giving up the great, and letting your motivation lye within the seeking. It’s hard to be honest with yourself, that damn book quote has kept me going through a lot. Maybe it’s time I look to stepping away from what I know, and toward the unsteady waters of what could be. Thanks John, your videos remind me that even though I hate yelling at the captain on the boat, it beats just waiting to hit the iceberg.
I love that John is super honest about his flaws. Like he had harmful ways of thinking when he was younger but he put effort into learning and evolving and doing good with what he learned- goals
I leave all of your videos with a feeling of hope, and it never ceases to amaze me how you and Hank are able to get your ideas and thoughts across so eloquently. You both have been mentors for me throughout high school, and I just wanted to say thank you for all that you do. From inspiring words to silly inside jokes, all of it makes an impact. I aspire to be as self-aware and concious of my ability to make a change in the world as you and Hank are. Also HUGE fan of Looking For Alaska and all of your other books!!! Thanks again!
John, your constant ability to evolve and ponder yourself, your own path and the world around you will never cease to amaze me. I love your books because of it. But I don't think you've reached your best yet. It's beautiful that after all of your success, you can still put it all in perspective, you can detach yourself without aggrandizing yourself. Your critical and self-aware point of view is and will keep maturating. Thank you for sharing this journey!
I'm always waiting for Tuesdays and Fridays. There's a certain vibe to your videos that cheer me up. Whether they deal with important topics, they are plainly funny or even kind of sad. These video always motivate and help when I feel like I'm drowning in bad thoughts again.
Thank you so much for your videos :)
Understanding how and why we burn may be one of the most important things we can do. I am guilty of burning out and using a lot fuel that is unstable, but being able to better understand that I can’t do that all the time has helped me to realize how to not burn out so often. As a society I believe we have an unhealthy relationship with work, and we value the late nights and burn out. Taking time to realize in yourself how to prevent that and take care of yourself is such an important step in the process. Thank you for these wonderful videos about something that’s been on my mind recently.
Hope this question isn't too broad: In the end, did you find that it was cultivating an external focus that just worked as better fuel for creating, by making for others first, yourself second? In other words, was it just a healthier frame of reference when motivating yourself and creating? Or did that introspection help you grow, and THEN you shared the upgraded product from the upgraded you with people, which kept you aloft since? Basically: outward progress validated internally, or internal progress validated externally? Thanks!
The external focus is the fuel. The idea of making something for people that might be useful to them, or that might be a consolation to them, is the fuel that works for me. It burns slowly, and not as bright as resentment or fear or loathing or whatever, but it's the only way that works for me. (That said, much of my favorite work has been fueled at least in part by resentment; see, for instance, Taylor Swift's song "Bad Blood." So I'm not saying there's only one right way!) -John
@@vlogbrothers Thanks for responding! I think slow cookers are a great metaphor here: either whip together a quick meal to eat by yourself, or you take the care and let something simmer, and share it when it's done. Long story short, I hope life gives plenty of opportunities to prep some slow cookers :)
I don’t know why but I’ve really started to enjoy the Good morning Hank it’s Tuesday from you. I realize it’s a small part of your videos but since it’s such a calm and seemingly collected phrase you always seem to pull me out of the real world into the much richer and exiting world of nerdfiteria. Thank you for allowing me to be grabbed out of my normal life.
Hey, John. I’m from Pelham, AL, and I really appreciated your geographical accuracy in Looking for Alaska. As simple as that may sound, I felt more connected to the setting and narrative because of it. I actually had a friend transfer to Indian Springs for high school after reading the book! We’d love to have you back in town sometime 💛
feeling a lot of resentment these days. that may be my main feeling of the past couple of years at college, actually. Thanks for being open and honest about yours, John
I love the "more light than heat" line, especially recalling that that bit specifically was one of your potential titles for Paper Towns. Paper Towns is the perfect title for the book, but man, "more light than heat" sure is a beautiful set of words.
The hope that you so clearly have and fight for is really inspiring. This video meant a lot to me and I appreciate it. Thanks John
On a related side note: the content coming from this channel has really been helping me through a very rough time in my life. John and Hank: I appreciate your honest and often deep and insightful content. You do good work. Thank you.
I've just finished reading Turtles All the Way Down, and I'm really starting to appreciate the cleverness of single lines that you write or say. "Burning in the smithy of my soul" is one such line. I love your use of language, and hope to continue enjoying your books, videos, podcasts and anything else you produce!
John, *this video* was a most brilliant and welcome of revelations from you. Thank you so much for sharing! It pins a tail on the stubborn donkey I rode on my own journey with resentment.
Decades of seeing the impact of heartless corporate cultures on myself and my coworkers drove me to _try_ and start a consulting company with the massively "altruistic" goal of pointing companies in the direction of productive empathy. I never got it off the ground.
It hit me in a fit of depression that the my so-called altruism was being fueled by resent, not by authentic connection (the hidden fury of resentment isn't exactly the best way to win over clients). And the resentment _still_ simmers, even today, but I've found other connections in other places in my life. Better, healthier, and more productive and fun connections. I'll get back to helping corporate culture eventually, but on my own terms, not on the terms of my resentment donkey. Thanks again for sharing the power to be vulnerable.
Resentment is one way of phrasing that sentiment. I often refer to it as "one-upping" others. It fuels my workouts in the morning at 5am... Ultimately, I have to remind myself that many of the things I do as a teacher (event planning, coordinating committees, supervising clubs, etc), serve a greater purpose and has nothing to do with me (or padding a resume). That one-uppmanship becomes a dedication to student life and school spirit...and that is a far greater motivator for anything I do. Knowing that what I involve myself in will generate so much positive energy is amazing.
This one really connected with me. I too have done things just to spite the "haters" as if they actually cared what I was doing. I was just doing them for myself. Great video John
To go fast, go alone. To go far, go together. I'm not the center of the Universe and I wouldn't even be where I am without so much what has gotten me here. Gratitude fuel is my favorite, and helping people. Also defining myself as a contribution to help serve so much around me, because it's not all about me and sometimes I feel that I owe people and the Universe before me to live a joyful, present, and valuable life of caring. Thanks, John.
This really struck a chord with me, John. Thanks for sharing
I needed to hear this today got admit I haven’t check in awhile. Yet I was thinking how much I have to work. Cause what has taken me years and perseverance has been given to some people by just being related. Yet I remind myself my resentment only limits me and damages my own self image. Let it go and continue what you need to do for your own path.
Oh my God why did I need this so terribly? I’m sitting here in the midst of a first draft novel wondering why I am not strung in the bones with words of Pulitzer Prize winners and Oscar Wilde thoughts when really I shouldn’t care if my books are successful or not. It’s not about the thing, it’s about the journey on the way to that thing. Thank you John.
I‘m glad that you revisited this topic because I was struggling a little with the fuel metaphor after Hank’s video, but the more you guys talk about it the better I understand it. I really liked the conversation that Hank and Katherine had about good vs. bad fuel this week on Delete This too.
Another John video to add to his list of classics! These videos are the best! Thank you for making them.
and you have just quietly motivated me at the EXACT (note currently eating a delicious but pity based burrito) moment I needed some. writing as a gift to others. such a simple yet important concept. Thank you for improving my undergrad dissertation before I've even begun writing.
Your vlogs are always so interesting. Nothing like anything else on this platform. Thank you for always giving me something to think about. ...
This is oddly applicable to my life right now. I get preoccupied with being mad about previously being screwed over by people that I am still stuck in close proximity to until this June. I can't really talk to them about it in any meaningful way about being frustrated or just straight up mad, because of power dynamics. The energy from being resentful kinda petered out a while ago though, and now it's just the drive to get things done so I change my circumstances in a few months.
John, I really really really love your words. I have a VERY difficult time picturing things when I read which has rendered so much of the literary world so arduous and stories so full of holes that books are often nonsensical to me. But your words somehow always resonate for me. I can picture the world you verbalize very completely. Probably because you tend to the purpose in your writing and your verbal essays with such care that no word is superfluous. They all point to your purpose. And it's a beautiful one.
I think this is one that I will need to come back on later and just let what John said sink into my mind gradually. thanks in advance
Oh, man can't believe John thought he isn't handsome enough
Ahh i know right!! He is 40 ish now still so so attractive
Imagine watching these videos and not thinking John Green is handsome, can't relate
@@francescakyanda9182 ikr me neither
Thank you for this John. The video hit just at the right time. I was just thinking that the human capacity for self-pity is truely endless. Thank you for reminding me that that's normal.
Just echoing the comments that I am really enjoying your guys' videos lately and your perspective on things. I think it is a difficult time of year for a lot of people so we all could use some insight. :) love you bros.
I find myself doing things out of spite sometimes and it's mixed in results. Like, growing up, no one was telling me I deserved things (often, people were saying boys deserved more than me) so I was driven to prove myself in every aspect of my life just to be noticed. This baby feminist determination transformed into adulthood persistence, which is good, but it can be a little too much sometimes, because I often am disappointed in myself when I can't do enough and leads to some imposter syndrome. Working for what you want and not falling for toxic crappy feelings is a hard process to learn.
Id' say the drive to prove one's worth to the people around you is basic human survival instinct, not baby feminism. But everything else you write is well communicated truth
Have you read A Room of One’s Own? You may find it encouraging. She talks a little about resentment creeping into women’s writings because of the environment we grow up in. And the barriers women faced throughout history to be writers. But ultimately, it ends up being so hopeful. I think it can apply to more that women writing or making, but also doing and being the things we want to do and be. Maybe apply to more people than solely women.
@@nicole-corine4121 yeah, I love it and I love the message behind it. Thanks for reminding me of it
I really like those valentine's day cards! The art is so good! They sayings on them are so cute!
I made the cards! I'm so glad you like them, and I had a LOT of good friends who were excellent at coming up with nerdfighter puns
So two things I think most of my late teens and early twenties ran on resentment so this resonated. I listen to Dear Hank and John when I run and I just finished the episode from January 7th and I'm dying over the fact that there were Olive Garden commercials during this video.
Those are some BEAUTIFUL cards that I've definitely never seen before. What a talented artist this Sharon person must be! I wonder if she's made anything else that is also available on DFTBA your friendly neighborhood e-tailer.
Yeah, I can't seem tuatara think of a single thing!
I really appreciate this because it feels like I'm at that stage in my life where I'm actually trying to stop doing things as an f u to other people, but rather just for myself, and its good to know that I'm on the right track ♡ Thanks John
Very nice vlog, thanks. I've been snuff vlogging for zombie cage supervisors and have never felt so much rage.
I once tried to write novels and poems out of resentment, but they honestly weren't very good. I found that they were always flat. The best work I think create is when I just want to be heard and be vulnerable. What drives my work is the absolute desire to be real. I feel that if I can be real one the page, then someone reading it can feel real too.
How do you cram so much sheer radness into just 4 minutes every fuckin week this video is awesome
That tracks, I didn’t love looking for Alaska, but I did love your later books like turtles all the way down and it’s because of the more balanced perspective of the later main characters. That’s good though, your work has evolved with you and it’s getting better and so are you
"A document of my attempted cleverness," dear god that sounds familiar. I was never one for resentment but early 20's me fell into the other hole for a long while and deep. I still have to struggle with that impulse but I can now resist that urge. With effort.
I used to watch your crash course videos and I liked them a lot. I agree a lot with your idea of resentment. I’m 20 years old and atheist, and knowing a little too much about this world makes us feel tiny and incapable. Therefore this sort of depression and resentment start to appear and it really consumes people. Your simple words really enlighten me some bit even though I still cannot fully understand them. Those conclusions take years of experience to produce, but thanks!
I turned 25 a few months ago and I have no idea what I'm doing with my career or life while my friends are getting married and buying freaking houses which has led to many a freakouts in the year 2019. In short, I had no idea how much I needed this video until I watched it which is how I feel about most vlogbrothers videos.
Yes, this is a good video to end the day with. Thanks, John. I’ll see you on tuesday.
this actually explains a lot of why i didn't personally enjoy looking for alaska nearly as much as i've enjoyed some of your other books, john
Oh my god Looking for Alaska was one of my favorite books growing up and to think that you wrote it when you were my age!!
when i see him move somewhere else when it cuts i just imagine him saying "link down in the dublidoo' and just slowly scootching over thinking of what he wants to say next.
This video and some comments have helped me realize: I think I have been depressed and unproductive because when I try to find fuel to *do* the things, all I focus on is the guilt around *not* doing the things. That's an internal, negative fuel, and it goes out like a candle in the slightest of winds. I should try to redirect my focus onto my goals of helping the world--an external, positive fuel.
Sure, I regret the mistakes I've made, but I regret the time I wasted on resentment the most. Eventually, I learned from my mistakes. When dancing with resentment you never know whether to lead, or follow. This was a great vlog. Great lesson.
It's good to see that even the most unfortunate events/feelings can bring us some fuel and good.
I’m a big believer in art as transformative. Each one of my videos or stories or poems helps me learn a little bit about myself. Keep making stuff!
There are a lot of really combustible fuels that we use to drive the engine of our lives. It's hard to dump the tank out and start over. It feels like you're getting rid of something you invested in and that's wasteful. I'm in the process of emptying the tank this year--hopefully over time I will burn cleaner.
Peg Y +
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"And the story felt distant and cold"
To be fair, it is called Looking for Alaska
I used blind rage as fuel to write my very best story. It's good, and I'm really proud of it. Alas, however, even if justified, that sort of rage just can't last, and now that I'm once again content, I have no creative writing left in me. Which is fine. I'll leave that up to you.
the monologue that ended in "the human capacity for self-pity is truly endless" was amaaazing lol
I've rewatched this video so many times already
I don't celebrate Valentine's Day but oh my goodness those cards are adorable. And I really enjoy the poetic and, I guess, the philosophical manner of speaking John has. He can talk about the dumbest things and be hilarious and a second later he's deep and eloquent.
Hey I made those cards! Thanks so much for your lovely comment 💞
OMG John I watch this video like nine hours ago and JUST REALIZED THE TITLE IS A STINKING PUN YOU GENIUS TURD
Effective but toxic.
I need to tell that phrase to my son, and keep it in mind for myself. We try so hard to do so much and end up poisoning ourselves with our own efforts - he and I both. Then, when the anxiety and depression wash over us and crush us, we both blame ourselves and get sucked right down to the bottom of it all, almost without a gasp of protest. It's hard to break that cycle, but maybe this kind of thinking can help. Anything that helps, in any amount, is desperately needed - by most of us, I think.
A good video to watch when I’ve been working on my novel all day.
I like that you call that draft the novel that would turn into LfA. I hope that one day this draft will turn into something too. I started it because I felt there was a lack in the literary world and I wanted to fill it. I want this story to be there for the people who see that hole the way I did. Hopefully that’s enough for it to become something.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE UPSET THAT I DON'T LIVE IN INDIANAPOLIS!!! She said from her cozy Canadian office while studying Indigenous language revitalization which has nothing at all to do with this job. HOW AMAZING WOULD IT BE TO WORK FOR JOHN AND THE YETTI THOUGH. OH MAH GOURD!!
Those are definitely excellent valentines that I ordered as soon as I could! Don't have a valentine? Me either! (Unless you count my cat which is debatable depending on her mood) BUT HAVE YOU SEEN HOW CUTE THESE CARDS ARE?? Nerdfighter Sharon is talented indeed.
emily i'm shaking my head so hard
"You're not going to change the world by shouting at it"
This is my favorite quote from doctor who even though it's really random.
Looking for Alaska is your best work in my opinion. Looking forward for the series. Can't wait to see them all how other people imagined them and compare them to my imagination. Cool that you talked about it 4 days after her anniversary (she died on January 11. About 4 am...)
Best wishes from Germany😘🌼
PS: A wall sucks. One parted Germany once and many people died or suffered terrybly...
Just what I needed today. Thanks John!
John I just read Looking for Alaska! On January 9th and 10th!
I like that “more light than heat” phrase, you should title a book that!
Because I have Major Depression Disorder, I don't have any fuel. Nothing motivates me. So I decided to create things for no reason. And it works!
Thank you John; I needed to hear this today.
Got this notification while listening to dear john and hank. Thanks, John!
When I feel stress or resentment begin to build up I just repeat "you are so lucky" to myself, it helps even if I do not believe it at the time