The Truth About Texas. Dry Bar Comedy

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ความคิดเห็น • 308

  • @trkddy
    @trkddy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +379

    If you're more Texan than me . You're Mexican 🤣🤣🤣 it's funny because it's true

    • @Ethan7s
      @Ethan7s 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      The natives would like to have a word.

    • @FupaDoncic
      @FupaDoncic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Ethan7s they all got forced to Oklahoma

    • @trkddy
      @trkddy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@Ethan7s A lot of Mexicans are native

    • @Sara86A
      @Sara86A 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      That sure was funny😂😂😂😂

    • @Mr.Autodelete
      @Mr.Autodelete 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It’s true though I’m right on par with this guy he is spitting hill country facts

  • @evankane4993
    @evankane4993 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    "If you're more Texan than me you're Mexican."😂😂 Im a Texas born and raised Mexican and I approve this message😂😂 this man too funny

    • @MultiSmoke11
      @MultiSmoke11 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      My people didn't cross the border. The border crossed them

    • @anonymoose116
      @anonymoose116 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      ​@MultiSmoke11 that is absolutely correct.
      Which it's why it's so infuriating to see so many bigots here be hateful to Mexicans. Like...they were here first?

  • @saltrock9642
    @saltrock9642 2 ปีที่แล้ว +96

    This Louisiana boy really loves Texas. The best neighbors ever!

    • @andrealmoseley6575
      @andrealmoseley6575 ปีที่แล้ว

      I married a boy from Louisiana!!!

    • @nicthemickatx
      @nicthemickatx 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I grew opposite side of the line from Shreveport, in the black cypress bayou. I lived in Louisiana too and it's the only other state I'd live in. I love my cajun brothers and sisters. What's funny, when you get out in west Texas a lot of them don't even consider us Texans but more like Cajuns. What's even funnier is when Texas was it's own nation, west Texas wasn't part of Texas.

    • @irishpanic
      @irishpanic 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Texas also loves having Louisiana as a neighbor. You guys sure know how to have fun 🤣

    • @RossArlenTieken
      @RossArlenTieken 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Y'all are also the best neighbors ever.

  • @clrobinson1776
    @clrobinson1776 2 ปีที่แล้ว +94

    I would be a vegetarian if it weren’t for bacon. Oh, wait. I live in the South where bacon is a vegetable.

    • @nephicus339
      @nephicus339 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I mean, surely it rubbed up against or ate some vegetables before becoming bacon. That's how it works, right?

    • @subnoizesoldier2
      @subnoizesoldier2 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Correct 😂

  • @beatleme2
    @beatleme2 2 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    If you didn't laugh at it …learn from it…an extra from a tornado film 😂

  • @ryuuhisakawa7160
    @ryuuhisakawa7160 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Okay but the Italian grandmother/Korean dictator joke was fantastic

  • @LogicalDisaster
    @LogicalDisaster 2 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    As a Texan, I was thrilled to hear the vegan jokes because you really never would think that a born and raised TEXAN could be vegan.

    • @MimiDidi121
      @MimiDidi121 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      I started to watch the Karen Read trial. Imagine my surprise when they all had Boston accents! Oh, it’s not Canton Texas?!?!? No 1st Mondays? Seriously, I really thought it was in Texas because I heard a woman was charged with murdering her boyfriend by backing up over him while drunk in Canton. I live in Western Arkansas so the only Canton I knew was Canton Texas and the first Monday flea markets! Maybe I should get out a little more.

    • @markpenny9293
      @markpenny9293 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@MimiDidi1210

    • @ASMRyouVEGANyet
      @ASMRyouVEGANyet หลายเดือนก่อน

      Because we're tired of cowboy culture and see the destruction of our planet from cattle ranching

  • @k_h_nobody
    @k_h_nobody ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Very historically accurate. If you didn't laugh, you didn't get it.

    • @P71ScrewHead
      @P71ScrewHead 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Some ppl prefer to ignore facts..

  • @willothewisps.7539
    @willothewisps.7539 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    The resonating truth of the Italian Mother comment, made me wheeze. Loved it.

  • @sgtprestonoftheyukon2423
    @sgtprestonoftheyukon2423 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I was born and raised in Texas. There's a great stage play called GREATER TUNA . Texans love it and none Texans just watch it and think ARE TEXANS REALLY LIKE THAT ??? . YES WE ARE !!!!! WE'RE JUST LIKE THAT !!!! .

    • @oliverklozhoff
      @oliverklozhoff 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Never heard of it. I'll have to check it out

    • @sgtprestonoftheyukon2423
      @sgtprestonoftheyukon2423 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@oliverklozhoff it's incredible. Two actors play all the characters. From 9 year old boys to old ladies. And these guy's are some Amazing quick change artist. They walk behind a piece of scenery and come out as a different character. But the story line and the writing is what blew me away. It's worth checking out.

    • @margaretthemagnificent
      @margaretthemagnificent หลายเดือนก่อน

      “Five states affected by a nuclear plant explosion… (scans report) Texas NOT one of them!” The end of that line is quoted in my house every time there’s bad news in the headlines but it’s not TX. :) Love Tuna!

  • @parisholden23
    @parisholden23 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    This is all so true. I'm a tried and true TEXAN!!!! ❤️

    • @AKHWJ3ST
      @AKHWJ3ST 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Especially the one about driving from Florida to California. I don't know if it's possible to drive from the Louisiana state line all the way to El Paso in one trip. I tried it once. I almost caused a wreck from road hypnosis so I stopped for the night.

  • @XiAnais-bt9ke
    @XiAnais-bt9ke 2 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    When he said he was more Texan I was like nah, I'm 7 Gen, and then he said "if you're mexican" and I was like, nope, that checks 😂😂

  • @lesterlaw8072
    @lesterlaw8072 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    God bless Texas

  • @mimimonster
    @mimimonster 2 ปีที่แล้ว +93

    As a Texan I approve of these comedians ❤️

    • @testedtruths6978
      @testedtruths6978 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Not a Texan, but I am willing to learn..

  • @withlol777
    @withlol777 2 ปีที่แล้ว +96

    I have great love and respect for Texas! 🇺🇸

    • @emilymeyers6069
      @emilymeyers6069 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I don’t 😭

    • @Jaded4blue
      @Jaded4blue 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I MISS texas life... too hottt for me. Minnesota is just perfect for me.

    • @majoroldladyakamom6948
      @majoroldladyakamom6948 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Jaded4blue
      Ahhh, the Land of 10,000 Lakes... Step-mom got her ARNP at the Mayo Clinic.
      First time that I was in -40° F. I was 16. Froze the hair in my nose unpacking our car.
      Ouch... 🙃
      Ditto, but I prefer the Great NorthWET. Didn't know that there was NO S in that word, didja.
      Moved here when I was 6 weeks old. Have the webs between my toes and the moss behind my ears to prove it.
      Many blessings, from your eternal sister in Christ somewhere near Seattle.
      ⚘🙏❤🙏⚘

    • @Sara86A
      @Sara86A 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Me too! I lived in TX for 13 years! My parents house is still in TX!!! Texas Panhandle!😊

    • @Mr.Autodelete
      @Mr.Autodelete 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Jaded4blue everyone from Minnesota moved down here making Minnesota a Texas colony and you the governer

  • @oliverklozhoff
    @oliverklozhoff 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Stockyards Ft Worth kid here born n bred. I love the "texan stoopid" jokes. Very entertaining stuff!

    • @Jaded4blue
      @Jaded4blue 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Haha..... I'm sure Minnesota jokes are even funnier. Miss Texas ❤ it's just toooooo HOTTT for me!!!

    • @majoroldladyakamom6948
      @majoroldladyakamom6948 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Love the Stockyards. Have a pix of me, hand raised high, on a stationary bronco bull riding, w a bull ring audience backdrop...
      Also have an original watercolor of the Riverwalk, kinfolk in Carthage, DFW, Terrell and Del Rio.
      Nuttin' like flossing the sand out of your teeth/mouth for 3 daZe when you take a dune buggy ride up and down S Padre.
      That be some serious Crispy sand, lol. 😄

    • @crystalcakesalvarado6156
      @crystalcakesalvarado6156 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Fort Worth here too! ❤️

    • @oliverklozhoff
      @oliverklozhoff 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@crystalcakesalvarado6156 you're pretty cute there crystal

    • @irishpanic
      @irishpanic 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      We can afford to be dumb 🤣

  • @Nomadistar
    @Nomadistar 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I am from Oak Cliff & it is hard to find anything fun or funny about it...at least we have Stevie! I admire you for taking a shot at it & hope you pull it off!

    • @dannytarrant5110
      @dannytarrant5110 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      The zoo is cool in oak cliff. Other than that yes it sucks.

    • @yyxy.oncesaid
      @yyxy.oncesaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      How about the great Cliff or the Oak tree/s

    • @FupaDoncic
      @FupaDoncic 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      The attempt at gentrification up north was pretty funny

    • @oliverklozhoff
      @oliverklozhoff 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ah, u gotta take the good with the bad

    • @justinvaughn8051
      @justinvaughn8051 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Oak cliff?? I'm from mesquite. Used 2 get my weed in oak cliff. I Didn't stay there very long

  • @rodneearmour9715
    @rodneearmour9715 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    The first guy was absolutely hilarious!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @1bestfriend2u18
    @1bestfriend2u18 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    7:13 paul looks like a chef after work.

  • @brett4264
    @brett4264 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Shouldn't have ended with that last one. Really brought down the mood.

  • @RazyrDiarmait
    @RazyrDiarmait 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Lol Bruce Lopez and Jackie Chavez

  • @bobthompson4319
    @bobthompson4319 2 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    The stork joke is the best anti vegetarian joke ever

    • @52156drj
      @52156drj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Best One I've heard.

  • @Wynter_Heat
    @Wynter_Heat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Not the oak cliff lady at the end 😄😂

  • @GaylaRoof
    @GaylaRoof 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I know this was 2 yrs ago, but chris cope is SOOOO RIIIIGHT!!! I moved to tx from IL nearly 50 yrs ago...best thing i ever did. I LOVE tx. My 1st impression was, it FOREVER, to go a "few miles down the road".
    Chris made me laugh so much. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @LabGecko
      @LabGecko หลายเดือนก่อน

      I was born in Texas, but live in France now. It's funny telling someone in Europe that yeah, we used to drive _in traffic_ for two hours to go to a movie and thought nothing of it. And two hours back home when it's over. Then when they don't believe me I tell them to realize that France fits INSIDE Texas... but Texas has half the people. Except Dallas. Dallas is about half the size of Paris, AND half the people. Not DFW mind you, just Dallas. Because that's the only Texas city most Europeans know. Those calculations aren't exactly right though. Texas doesn't have sidewalks, so that's a bit of an error rate. Oh I know, Texans call them road shoulders, but if you're speaking to a Parisian they won't know what that is so you just say sidewalk.

  • @robertschwartz4810
    @robertschwartz4810 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Prisms don't turn light gay. Mirror balls do!

  • @yolandaarenas6492
    @yolandaarenas6492 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    “I’m Texan”, proud of it”!

  • @Umma81
    @Umma81 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Love the first guy!!! Hilarious 😂 and crowed didn’t catch jokes fast enough 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤣

    • @effu9593
      @effu9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I'm one of em, I thought Texans spoke slowly,ever see Rodney Carrington? He's funny

  • @carolkinney1327
    @carolkinney1327 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    This Kansan respects Texas sooo much. But, ribs are king! ❤😊

  • @walkerdavidson4465
    @walkerdavidson4465 2 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I am from Texas and he has lied bacon is not the king of all meats a good smoked brisket is the king

    • @nicthemickatx
      @nicthemickatx 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Facts. The sad part is brisket so high and if you want a good one you just about have to do it yourself. Guys now are throwing a slab in the smoke for 6-8 hours and calling bbq. If a brisket was in the box for less than 16 and it's done your smoke was way too hot. A fatty Brisket done for 48 in a cold smoke smokehouse is a sight to behold when done right. Your smoke is about 170 degrees and coming through a pipe.

    • @jannettemason9335
      @jannettemason9335 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      True! Texan here

  • @ravens6286
    @ravens6286 2 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    "I don't eat anything w/a face on it. Neither do I, I take the face off". I choked on my spit trying to laugh. That was funny!! (@ least in my opinion).

    • @gillifish
      @gillifish 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      As a vegetarian (not really by choice) it was hilarious 🤣

    • @Kaniwani
      @Kaniwani 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah, that was really funny for me, too. Replayed that part multiple times.

    • @billmarshall5040
      @billmarshall5040 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Same! 😂😂😂😂

  • @FairyPhantasia
    @FairyPhantasia 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Last lady. Keep working on that delivery. You'll get there. You have great jokes. I know people were dogging your last video on Dry Bar.

    • @grizzlehatchet1
      @grizzlehatchet1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      She seemed drunk as hell lol... In a sober town.

    • @robertmickelberg3720
      @robertmickelberg3720 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      She has to learn to read the room and know when to move on to a different line of jokes. She was dying up there and it was hard to watch.

    • @shoezomaku
      @shoezomaku 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I thought she was really funny (of course I only saw this one clip)

    • @yyxy.oncesaid
      @yyxy.oncesaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@grizzlehatchet1 A sobar town.
      Where?

    • @mySeaPrince_
      @mySeaPrince_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I have shoes...

  • @salemprompthous3820
    @salemprompthous3820 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    El Paso: Tomorrow
    New Mexico: Maybe
    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @nolaknowles9888
      @nolaknowles9888 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Sad thing about that joke? It ain't that funny. If you cross the Louisiana/Texas border in Orange, TX, that sign says El Paso 857.

  • @DJMizzy
    @DJMizzy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    First comedian: He’s handsome and funny! I’m here for it!

  • @Lostenoch
    @Lostenoch 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The next time i hear "i dont eat things with a face" im using that "neither do i, i cut the face off" 😂😂😂

  • @andrealmoseley6575
    @andrealmoseley6575 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Soon as I heard your voice I almost cried with homesickness

  • @BeStillandKnowwithAdam
    @BeStillandKnowwithAdam 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    That last lady had me crying laughing! I don’t know what it was about her delivery. 🤣

    • @Karlalovescandy18
      @Karlalovescandy18 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      lol that she was wasted asf and this the DRY bar comedy lol

    • @GreenVenus
      @GreenVenus 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      She was funny af to me, I dunno why the audience wasn't laughing more lol

  • @andrealmoseley6575
    @andrealmoseley6575 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I so needed this today. So many fond memories!!! Still laughing at the Oregon state fair line because now I live in the NW!

  • @yyxy.oncesaid
    @yyxy.oncesaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I'm a kiwi so along way from the lone Star state but I do know that as a kid Texas is where all the best cowboy movies n shows were set . Probably was Hollywood but was Texas to me.
    Remember the Alamo.....
    Hell. Yeah

    • @sgtprestonoftheyukon2423
      @sgtprestonoftheyukon2423 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      JOHN WAYNE: THE SEARCHERS it's a great western and a little to accurate for the PC crowd. It was supposed to be set in Texas , but it was actually filmed in MONUMENT VALLEY UTAH .which confused the crap out of me .

    • @dovie2blue
      @dovie2blue 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Not the "spaghetti westerns." Like The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. Those were located in Italy and Spain.

  • @Rg452
    @Rg452 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Funny stuff!! I embrace the sun rise in the piney woods of beautiful East Texas every morning and wouldn't trade it for anything.

  • @wnbrknisezlyfxd2951
    @wnbrknisezlyfxd2951 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    The reason everyone in Texas flies a Texan flag is to remember they're still in Texas...

  • @carlaaustin6054
    @carlaaustin6054 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I like his humor. Hadn't heard such humor about Texans. This is hilarious.

  • @Lonezewolflonewolf
    @Lonezewolflonewolf 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    That last one, you could feel the slience in the room.

  • @ashtree336
    @ashtree336 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Stork joke was brilliant

  • @johnrooney507
    @johnrooney507 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Texas had some of the prettiest and least stuck on themselves women I’ve ever met. I liked the don’t mess with Texas signs and state pride. Did once have some inbred refuse to sell me a six pack of beer even after showing military ID so drove a quarter mile and purchased at another gas station. Guess I didn’t look country enough for the first guy.

    • @majoroldladyakamom6948
      @majoroldladyakamom6948 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS... the anti-littering State slogan. They also think that it's their God-given right to drive down the freeway with loaded guns and a bottle of beer between their legs. Know that.
      My dad was born and raised in Houston, home of the 🎶 Mary, Did You Know song fame, Mark Lowry, and - yes, I do have an Ex from Texas.
      He lied to me when he proposed; thus, why he's an ex... 👍 True story. I'd rather be single than lied to.

    • @mySeaPrince_
      @mySeaPrince_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Was your gun too well maintained... 🐱 ...

    • @johnrooney507
      @johnrooney507 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@mySeaPrince_ No didn’t have conceal carry license, plus soldiers living in barracks were to keep even personal weapons in the armory.

    • @nephicus339
      @nephicus339 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I think it's just because he didn't recognize you from the wedding.. i mean family gathering.

    • @johnrooney507
      @johnrooney507 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nephicus339 Was so strange, no racial factor involved.

  • @stephentroyer3831
    @stephentroyer3831 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    There is such a thing as jowl bacon, taken from the jaw of the pig, which means it's part of the face!

    • @belindaspechtenhauser6621
      @belindaspechtenhauser6621 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Stephen, I actually heard about that Totally makes sense Good Lord look where bacon comes from ! Is it good??? Seriously like to know! You can go to HEB in Elgin TX And purchase a Large bag of chicken feet, Amoung other parts. YIKES 😬

    • @jasonh6919
      @jasonh6919 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@belindaspechtenhauser6621 Bacon is just smoked/cured pork belly

    • @stephentroyer3831
      @stephentroyer3831 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jasonh6919 it normally does come from pork belly, but jowl bacon is a little cheaper. The strips aren't as long and they're not straight.

    • @belindaspechtenhauser6621
      @belindaspechtenhauser6621 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jasonh6919 So jowel bacon 🥓 from the jowel I take it 🤔

  • @samkitty5894
    @samkitty5894 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Drive through liquor stores...another TX thing. For when you're too drunk to walk.

    • @maryellencook9528
      @maryellencook9528 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Fact.

    • @ericgautreaux1752
      @ericgautreaux1752 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      We have drive through daiquiri stores in Louisiana.

  • @adrienneharvey9140
    @adrienneharvey9140 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Always have the funniest comedians at dry bar

  • @anquinasraquel8897
    @anquinasraquel8897 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Don't mess with Texas

    • @kay-pu7hr
      @kay-pu7hr 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yeah!!

    • @deniselongino6769
      @deniselongino6769 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It’s not just a slogan it’s a lifestyle!

  • @andrealmoseley6575
    @andrealmoseley6575 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I got the T.I. joke but it took a second because I've been gone for a few years🤣

    • @anonymoose116
      @anonymoose116 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I got it, but only because my parent worked at TI when I was a kid 😂

  • @yahwehisdead
    @yahwehisdead 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    1:50
    "WOWWWW" - Alex Stein.
    Lol
    But that was epic

  • @Sara86A
    @Sara86A 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I lived in TX for 13 years! Miss my TX town! Red Raider Nation!!! Yes!!! He is funny for real...

  • @MrTekniqs
    @MrTekniqs 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That bacon tirade, Amazing.

  • @29sojourner29
    @29sojourner29 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Not Mexican, and don't speak Español. Yet, I am an 8th generation Texan, all of us born and raised in Texas; my son is the 9th. Yeah, like a real Texan, I'm very proud of that heritage.

    • @SPetta-sh7mo
      @SPetta-sh7mo หลายเดือนก่อน

      Me too! We are probably cousins 😊. I am 8 th generation

  • @__-pl3jg
    @__-pl3jg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    11:17 - To be fair, Texas interstates are 85mph speed limits for MOST of the distance East to West. When I drive through Louisiana, Mississippi, and Alabama the roads arent as smooth and the speed limits are lower. Texas is big but the roads are hella nice because we spend a large percentage of tax revenue on them.

    • @dovie2blue
      @dovie2blue 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not in Houston.

    • @__-pl3jg
      @__-pl3jg 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dovie2blue - Yea they're going to be slower inside city areas. Im talking about I-20 and some loops around cities like Austin for example where its 80 on the loop.

    • @keithg460
      @keithg460 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​​@@dovie2blue
      Yeah, but Houstonians still at least drive 85mph to help speed things along.

  • @treyhudson73
    @treyhudson73 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I don't wear no Stetson, but I'm willin' to bet son, that I'm as big a Texan as you are...

  • @cherylcarlson3315
    @cherylcarlson3315 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Tx is the best place to be from after 1 day of being there.

  • @robinright825
    @robinright825 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I'm originally from Maryland (Md/DC/Va area). Married my USAF husband and moved to TX the next day. After a few years he retired from the USAF. But..... (long story) we stayed in TX. Now been married nearly 30 yrs. Had I known marrying him meant a one-way ticket to Tx, I would have sent up smoke signals to everyone back home and maybe they'd have sent in a rescue team and gotten me out of here.
    I threaten my kids that if they scatter ANY of my ashes in Tx after I'm gone, I'm going to come back and haunt them!!!

    • @majoroldladyakamom6948
      @majoroldladyakamom6948 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      SALUTE AND PRAISE GOD for our Military!! Give him a huge hug for me, ok??
      Four men in my family have taken the call to Serve and Protect, including my precious son (5th conceived, 1st live birth), who is currently on Active Duty.
      A resounding applaud and a thunderous THANK YOU, and to all of the millions who hold down the Home Front... in more ways than we can ever imagine...
      🇺🇲 ⚘🙏❤🙏⚘ 🇺🇲

    • @tylerd.5694
      @tylerd.5694 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Nah Texas is pretty alright. It's all about your state of mind.

    • @effu9593
      @effu9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Tell us how you really feel 🤣

  • @keithg460
    @keithg460 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    That El Paso sign was put up as a joke. There are plenty of things between Houston and El Paso.
    Also, fun fact: New Mexico is closer than El Paso.

  • @laurakobetich9809
    @laurakobetich9809 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I’m also sixth gen Texan and am definitely gonna steal that joke😂

  • @res00xua
    @res00xua 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Or Native American

  • @burlfaulkii6496
    @burlfaulkii6496 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Some solidly funny comics.. 😄

  • @angemon003
    @angemon003 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    As a Texan as well. Well done. Comedy gold.

  • @Pax_Mayn3
    @Pax_Mayn3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Texas is the best and worst place to live. They get some things right but completely miss the mark on others.

    • @yyxy.oncesaid
      @yyxy.oncesaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Umm,it can't be both

    • @Pax_Mayn3
      @Pax_Mayn3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@yyxy.oncesaid Somebody says your mom weighs a ton. "Actually a ton is 2,000 pounds and actually humans don't weigh that much actually". This is you.

    • @yyxy.oncesaid
      @yyxy.oncesaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Pax_Mayn3 R,ok.Thanx for that information.We use metrics where I live so......
      That Ain't me boy.
      No one ever has said my mum weights a ton either pal.

    • @Pax_Mayn3
      @Pax_Mayn3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@yyxy.oncesaid That's not the point. Stop taking everything so literal.

    • @yyxy.oncesaid
      @yyxy.oncesaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Pax_Mayn3 R,why not? Is it wrong to read something and presume the person that wrote it actually means what they say.Otherwise how could you possibly know what the person is trying to convey.

  • @cherieagan
    @cherieagan 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    El Paso tomorrow 😂 exactly

    • @keithg460
      @keithg460 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      There are several places between Houston and El Paso, so it's like it's straight desert. I have seen that El Paso sign. It is literally a joke.
      There's another sign that says Buccee's: 184 miles. You can hold it. (Referring to the excellent bathrooms that everyone stops at)

  • @lindalape8493
    @lindalape8493 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Love this Texan!😂😂😂

  • @noworriesmate5903
    @noworriesmate5903 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The dude from Texas looks like sonny Bono.

  • @1bestfriend2u18
    @1bestfriend2u18 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    2:30 😄😄😄
    2:38 😄😄😄
    3:00 😄😄😄 it was sick once and now it's bacon 🥓 🥓
    3:43 🙅‍♀️

  • @alanmott-smith9358
    @alanmott-smith9358 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    LMAO ! I miss real Mexican food. If you play country music backwards, you get all of your stuff back.

  • @williamsstephens
    @williamsstephens 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm a seventh-generation Texan and a daughter of the Republic, so yes, my people were Mexican in 1832.

  • @leylasiraj27
    @leylasiraj27 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    i love the last lady as a texan! that would’ve killed in dallas!

  • @marcelogaea1064
    @marcelogaea1064 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    As a Texan, 😅😂🤣👍🏼

  • @brandongovreau9218
    @brandongovreau9218 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Imagine if someone went to a comedy club and the person heckled the comedian felt insulted and then said I don't even know what a joke is how funny is that?

  • @crownedcrow7745
    @crownedcrow7745 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Old girl calling Oakcliff a "little bit" of a rough hood is WILD. In Dallas there is a saying, the further north you go, the nicer it gets. Guess which way is Oakcliff?

  • @citadelblu637
    @citadelblu637 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I gave up saying I'm from Texas; I just say I'm from North Mexico now, and everyone gets it.

  • @merriehogle
    @merriehogle 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I decided you are adorable and hilarious within 40 seconds lol all the way ❤

  • @Aklifedesign
    @Aklifedesign 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    thank you. can u do South Carolina next? 🥰

  • @andrealmoseley6575
    @andrealmoseley6575 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm from Texas and hardly listen to country music...but my kids have been wrangled. Until I visited them in AL that is. YT started bringing on all the music about AL. I was converted for a few days. But it was eventually too depressing.

  • @Akavanmetre1
    @Akavanmetre1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Lmao.. I'm part of the Austin 300

  • @bossman325
    @bossman325 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Is it just me or does Jason Salmon look like if Denny Hamlin decided to give up racing Nascar and do stand-up comedy?!

  • @Gwenthecrusader
    @Gwenthecrusader 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    As a vegetarian Texan I absolutely agree

  • @lindalape8493
    @lindalape8493 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Texas state fair joke!😂😂😂

  • @stevebramblet7192
    @stevebramblet7192 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Siskel and Ebert back to back there 😅

  • @ericgautreaux1752
    @ericgautreaux1752 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm a Cajun and we eat the face too.

  • @growthisfreedomunitedearth7584
    @growthisfreedomunitedearth7584 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This was fkn brilliant.

  • @Mr.Autodelete
    @Mr.Autodelete 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Hey tommy that ain’t weird at all like 20 percent of Texans are northern Californians I’m proud of you bud

  • @JeffreyKillingsworth
    @JeffreyKillingsworth หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Bacon is the candy of the meat family. The only way to improve bacon is to wrap it in bacon.

  • @h7opolo
    @h7opolo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    5:09 i guffawed

  • @keithg460
    @keithg460 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    The first half were pretty good.
    The second half were pretty ignorant and hateful. They should spend more time in Texas and really get to know us.

  • @anti1training
    @anti1training 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Texas Yeah!!!

  • @stevecampbell1308
    @stevecampbell1308 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    a loaded gun in their car ? They have 2 on them 3 in the car, flame throwers, dynamite, rocket launchers, bazooka, grenades, land mines and 3 angry bigfoots in the trunk

  • @p.l.g3190
    @p.l.g3190 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I am a Texan by choice, and after having lived among these wonderful people for a while now, I can say that (in my experience), these jokes are mainly old, tired stereotypes that aren't terribly funny. I did like the one about how the "Texas Chainsaw Massacre's" bad guy could never have terrorized our State Fair, because, well, Texans and guns. As they say, it's funny because it's true. I also kinda liked the one about the vegan lady telling her significant other that he had to respect her opinions, and he replied, "Get better opinions."

  • @estereism
    @estereism 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    He's good 😂

  • @skyjust828
    @skyjust828 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You think the drive from Florida to California is bad try from Boise to Chattanooga😮🤔😭

  • @rexican26
    @rexican26 หลายเดือนก่อน

    It's not that face meat...unless it's barbacoca!!!

  • @atphoenix2020
    @atphoenix2020 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Drove cross country on mostly the I 10 - 880 miles!!!

    • @deniselongino6769
      @deniselongino6769 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Dallas to El Paso is the same distance as Dallas to Atlanta… going east you’ve traversed 5 states, going west you ain’t even LEFT Texas!

  • @CabinOnTheWater
    @CabinOnTheWater 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    All my ex's live in Texas. True story.

  • @Buck1954
    @Buck1954 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Texas used to be a friendly state till the Yankees came back in droves during the 80's.

  • @jewel9443
    @jewel9443 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Made me lol.. except for the last one.

  • @TommyOC_One
    @TommyOC_One 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    As a Californian, I'm offended for Texas.

  • @stefonrogers5980
    @stefonrogers5980 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    So apparently I’m a Texan 🥲😭