I never had a father figure. I had a father but he taught me nothing. All of my teachings are from video games, movies and anime. They are what raised me. The only thing my father probably taught me was to run away, be a coward and follow the laws. Absolutely clown shit. Having a father figure as a boy is more important than money.
This tight right here! I have a father but he his not a father figure, teacher , leader or a mentor but just a father. Am always looking to be taught and to learn from others.
I think it's okay to follow laws. I wouldn't like my kids growing up without a father and getting put in jail over my absence. (example) I think a father should be not as close to a family as i originally thought. a father should be a silhouette of your future self, and it's that bond, that if broken you often lose a sense of purpose. nothing wrong with a father who's always close and in your company 24/7, but in some sense a child needs to grow and learn to stand on their own two feet and make their own decisions, also a good trick i learnt growing up was to tell them earlier on that they need to ask questions to your parents and ask for advice. DONT EVER shun that away. that child is better off connected to you being the role model than other people. if they start taking emotional advice from someone else? that needs to be taken seriously as a parent. ASAP men without fathers lose that psychological connection which leads to chaos or maybe, in a glimmer of hope, a chance. to be great to feel this godly overwhelming affection for yourself that if you didn't stay true to oneself. you would have killed an entire bloodline. so, it's always good to look at your life from another person's perspective, or from a bird's eye view to guide you, and learn from your failures, no matter how shameful or embarrassing. that's why I also don't have many friends now days because I believe my enemies tell me more about me than they do. so, it was a retraining from constant years of my head down with depression and bullying myself to be better. You need to find something deep inside your heart that really makes you what you are. like I thought i was going to grow up and be a musician and spread my story, but i felt more loving emotion to be a clinical psychologist. and it saved me, and it saved my family. you'll find a path. everyone has one. you'll know when it comes. embrace it with open arms and forgive yourself. i believe in you
Same here man ... I've learnt from characters from games and movies and anime and also creators here on TH-cam more than I've learnt from my father ....my father never sat me down and told me anything good or encouraging or pacifying. Never had a good connection or feeling of closeness towards him even after being in the same home for 22 years...he worked and brought food and fed us for that I respect him ..... But other than that ..... Nothing ... I'm and introvert some who suffered with anxiety ... Low self esteem ... Self confidence for most of my life and it's the fictional characters that have kept me going and they are the ones who have understood me ..... I don't even have a single friend ... I'm not good at socialising .... So these movie characters and game characters are family to me .....
Bro i wish i was fucking dead. Your situation is really similar to mine. I just wish he knew that i still love him after all, and that I'm sorry I'm not worth being there for, nor I'm worth being taught life stuff as he supposedly had to. I'm not even worth being here breathing. And i hope he teaches my little brother to be someone in life, and all the thing he should've taught me. I truly wish, from the bottom of my heart that something bad happened when i was still in my moms belly, just so i wasn't here being a nuisance.
I would say realizing what you lack or what your father would of taught you and focus on sharpening those skills. Have a positive role model. That’s what I think though
My own experience is I became aware of my unconscious quest for a father figure. It turns out I've collected father figures along the way not only in the form of men I admired or felt responsible toward but also in the form of good ideas. In a way, Jordan has been a father to me in that he spoke to my shortcomings in a way that was both judgemental and compassionate, and that has helped me tremendously. In the end, the lack of an actual father is an everlasting scar on your soul, but the trick I think is to decide not to identify as a victim of this fatherlessness and to strive to become the father you always needed. That alone constitutes sufficient purpose to at least fill a bit of the void left by fatherlessne ss.
With all my respects but barely said nothing about father figure importance. I thought he was going to teach why is important. At least using the common day to day reality.
@UCenxf2evaRZ_LTXl9zASjGg I wouldn't say a broad interpretation, as much as a deeper and less literal one. As far as I can tell the problem is that many people simply don't have a direct father or father figure in their lives, and those people are in large part his main audience, so when tackling this subject it makes little sense to focus on how important it is to have a direct father figure in your life, when that's something people rarely have control over. Rather he seems to focus on how one might find fragments of the father (as in the archetype/image of the father) among what's accessible to all of us, through religion, great books and the like, if you happen to be one of the many who doesn't have one.
There is a better way. The parental custody of children is actually a very simple matter to solve given the true desire of “What is best for the child”. We first need to separate and discard marriage from family law as they no longer seem to be connected. We can develop protocols that confers (over time) equal parental rights and responsibilities,…..once parentage is proven? Children's natural maturation process has 3 essential stages. A. The unconditional love of the mother from birth until 7 years. The mother to have “thefinalsay” and to receive child allowance. B. The conditional love of the father, who takes his children out into the world, gives security and teaches social boundaries from 7 years until 13. The father to have “thefinalsay” and to receive child allowance. C. The friendship and respect of peers from 13 years until 18. The child to have “thefinalsay” If these 3 stages are not navigated successfully, maturation is unlikely to be satisfactorily achieved and mental resilience will be reduced. Such a regime of equal parental rights (over time) would bind parents into a co-operative relationship, because (over time) each will hold the power of “thefinalsay” sequentially when they are best favoured to use it. These family protocols would be the default position, but can in exceptional cases be varied by the court. What can possibly go wrong? Buckminster Fuller said:- “You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.” The alleviate suffering is worthy. To prevent it is divine, but thankless.
I question your idea on many levels, especially on marriage, but giving the child "The Final Say" when guidance is needed most? That would be outright foolishness.
I’m a year late but this is such a good summary. My son is currently coddled by his mother which is ok for now but at some point it’s going to be a hinderance
I never had a father figure. I had a father but he taught me nothing.
All of my teachings are from video games, movies and anime. They are what raised me. The only thing my father probably taught me was to run away, be a coward and follow the laws. Absolutely clown shit.
Having a father figure as a boy is more important than money.
This tight right here! I have a father but he his not a father figure, teacher , leader or a mentor but just a father. Am always looking to be taught and to learn from others.
I think it's okay to follow laws. I wouldn't like my kids growing up without a father and getting put in jail over my absence. (example)
I think a father should be not as close to a family as i originally thought. a father should be a silhouette of your future self, and it's that bond, that if broken you often lose a sense of purpose.
nothing wrong with a father who's always close and in your company 24/7, but in some sense a child needs to grow and learn to stand on their own two feet and make their own decisions, also a good trick i learnt growing up was to tell them earlier on that they need to ask questions to your parents and ask for advice. DONT EVER shun that away. that child is better off connected to you being the role model than other people. if they start taking emotional advice from someone else? that needs to be taken seriously as a parent. ASAP
men without fathers lose that psychological connection which leads to chaos or maybe, in a glimmer of hope, a chance. to be great to feel this godly overwhelming affection for yourself that if you didn't stay true to oneself. you would have killed an entire bloodline. so, it's always good to look at your life from another person's perspective, or from a bird's eye view to guide you, and learn from your failures, no matter how shameful or embarrassing. that's why I also don't have many friends now days because I believe my enemies tell me more about me than they do. so, it was a retraining from constant years of my head down with depression and bullying myself to be better.
You need to find something deep inside your heart that really makes you what you are. like I thought i was going to grow up and be a musician and spread my story, but i felt more loving emotion to be a clinical psychologist. and it saved me, and it saved my family. you'll find a path. everyone has one. you'll know when it comes. embrace it with open arms and forgive yourself. i believe in you
Same here man ... I've learnt from characters from games and movies and anime and also creators here on TH-cam more than I've learnt from my father ....my father never sat me down and told me anything good or encouraging or pacifying. Never had a good connection or feeling of closeness towards him even after being in the same home for 22 years...he worked and brought food and fed us for that I respect him ..... But other than that ..... Nothing ... I'm and introvert some who suffered with anxiety ... Low self esteem ... Self confidence for most of my life and it's the fictional characters that have kept me going and they are the ones who have understood me ..... I don't even have a single friend ... I'm not good at socialising .... So these movie characters and game characters are family to me .....
Bro i wish i was fucking dead. Your situation is really similar to mine.
I just wish he knew that i still love him after all, and that I'm sorry I'm not worth being there for, nor I'm worth being taught life stuff as he supposedly had to. I'm not even worth being here breathing.
And i hope he teaches my little brother to be someone in life, and all the thing he should've taught me.
I truly wish, from the bottom of my heart that something bad happened when i was still in my moms belly, just so i wasn't here being a nuisance.
Dang this man is deep
2:51 That famine has a name: Holodomor.
Wow.
This video is the 30th down on the list....behind a stupid Owen Wilson movie and other junk. This proves to me that TH-cam has an agenda
I don't know what a father should act like my dad was weird
How does one overcome absence of the father figure?
I would say realizing what you lack or what your father would of taught you and focus on sharpening those skills. Have a positive role model. That’s what I think though
@@Stress_._Free My dad taught me to get drunk, hit your wife and call her a cunt.
I never did those things, but that's all he taught me.
My own experience is I became aware of my unconscious quest for a father figure. It turns out I've collected father figures along the way not only in the form of men I admired or felt responsible toward but also in the form of good ideas.
In a way, Jordan has been a father to me in that he spoke to my shortcomings in a way that was both judgemental and compassionate, and that has helped me tremendously. In the end, the lack of an actual father is an everlasting scar on your soul, but the trick I think is to decide not to identify as a victim of this fatherlessness and to strive to become the father you always needed. That alone constitutes sufficient purpose to at least fill a bit of the void left by fatherlessne
ss.
@@arthursaeyman that cut me deep x
With all my respects but barely said nothing about father figure importance. I thought he was going to teach why is important. At least using the common day to day reality.
Horrible title for video. Click bait......
not at all, culture and university specifically are analogues to father figures.
exactly i agree
@UCenxf2evaRZ_LTXl9zASjGg I wouldn't say a broad interpretation, as much as a deeper and less literal one. As far as I can tell the problem is that many people simply don't have a direct father or father figure in their lives, and those people are in large part his main audience, so when tackling this subject it makes little sense to focus on how important it is to have a direct father figure in your life, when that's something people rarely have control over. Rather he seems to focus on how one might find fragments of the father (as in the archetype/image of the father) among what's accessible to all of us, through religion, great books and the like, if you happen to be one of the many who doesn't have one.
There is a better way. The parental custody of children is actually a very simple matter to solve given the true desire of “What is best for the child”. We first need to separate and discard marriage from family law as they no longer seem to be connected. We can develop protocols that confers (over time) equal parental rights and responsibilities,…..once parentage is proven?
Children's natural maturation process has 3 essential stages.
A. The unconditional love of the mother from birth until 7 years. The mother to have “thefinalsay” and to receive child allowance.
B. The conditional love of the father, who takes his children out into the world, gives security and teaches social boundaries from 7 years until 13. The father to have “thefinalsay” and to receive child allowance.
C. The friendship and respect of peers from 13 years until 18. The child to have “thefinalsay”
If these 3 stages are not navigated successfully, maturation is unlikely to be satisfactorily achieved and mental resilience will be reduced.
Such a regime of equal parental rights (over time) would bind parents into a co-operative relationship, because (over time) each will hold the power of “thefinalsay” sequentially when they are best favoured to use it.
These family protocols would be the default position, but can in exceptional cases be varied by the court. What can possibly go wrong?
Buckminster Fuller said:-
“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”
The alleviate suffering is worthy. To prevent it is divine, but thankless.
I question your idea on many levels, especially on marriage, but giving the child "The Final Say" when guidance is needed most? That would be outright foolishness.
I'd be very reluctant to let my hubby have the family allowance he'd only drink it away so your (biased advice) is cr*p!
I’m a year late but this is such a good summary. My son is currently coddled by his mother which is ok for now but at some point it’s going to be a hinderance
Patriarchal?