We didn’t have to compare ourselves to anybody but movie stars. And we had to watch movies or buy magazines to look at them. No one got boob jobs or other Plastic surgery as a norm, MEN AND WOMEN WERE ALLOWED TO HAVE BODY HAIR. The world is broken.
Loving that Catlin is bringing up the other side of this issue! Its so easy to think of body issues as being a female only problem the more we talk about this the easier it will be to center self-acceptance and non-judgement! (Also congrats on 70k) 🎉
As someone who finished their first year of psychology and sociology, I do think mental health issues regarding the body and social media are a genuine concern. It's why I uninstalled all social media like tiktok and instagram, because of the rotting of my perception of what's real and what's not. It's made me 'wake up' about the reality of my appearance. At first, it was hard because I thought I was getting ugly lol but it was actually because I was no longer enhancing my photos and using filters all the time. I had to get used to seeing my ACTUAL self which isn't necessarily ugly but isn't a fake version of myself. I'm starting to see how pretty I actually am, so I probably won't engage with instagram or tiktok again.
@@CaitlinPawlowski mewing actually works lol I've always have a bad underbite and it massively improves your teeth alignment and double chin. I found out about it before 'looksmaxing' became a thing, it originates from a real dentist. The results in the tiktok videos are hugely obviously overstated, but for mouth posture its very useful. Just finished the vid and wowww, i didnt know how deep the rabbit hole went
@@Llkoliigenerally I think mewing was started by a dentist to build good habits to prevent mouth breathing, which can lead to sleep problems and sinus/breathing issues.
All of this is sad as hell. I know no guys are likely to read this but: I'm happily married to a balding 5'6" man who is smart and kind and I think he's gorgeous. It's not about what other sad isolated men tell you, it's about who you are and how you relate to others, women, and men, and children, that makes you a person who's good to be around and frankly loveable.
No offense but you being happily married or married to a balding guy is not a unicorn, women have been thought to look at personality over looks ,so it's more common to see a beautiful woman next to a man that's not physically attractive,
Not offense,but you being happily married or being married to a balding guy is not a unicorn,women have been thought to prioritize personality over looks when it comes to men,while being told to look physically good for men ,so what you are doing is the norm not surprising
@@purplelove3666 Yet somehow these poor young men end up convinced that they have to hurt themselves so badly physically, while not prioritizing their mental health and personality! It's a real problem of messaging.
Thank you for this video!! As a mama of a almost teen boy.....it is heartbreaking to hear some of these "trends"! Thank you for bringing these to light and making others aware!
Some might turn even that toxic. As Caitlin mentions the idea behind many of these things isn't bad but how it's executed, ouch. And I'm afraid that some take that seriously 😲 E.g. the guy who didn't eat for one or two days. Bro, your body is flashing the "low battery" warning light! Get some fuel!
Great vid! I'm a man and think a big issue is as a man we're shamed for talking about our insecurities due to largely patriarchal gender norms. As someone who is also in their early 30s I was deeply insecure, skinny, average heighted guy throughout my teens and early 20s. Never really had luck with girls until I was like in my mid 20s so I just carried on. I always say if I had access as a teenager to these communities it would've easily radicalized me, so I'm glad I grew up in a time where these communities didn't really exist or were readily accessible. Now that I'm 30, it's hard to tell a other younger men that things get better, when they feel constantly rejected and can't talk about it other than in a toxic echo chamber. My life is pretty great now with a loving partner who I find beautiful, good job, etc, it just took longer to get there.
@sighswoons with that thumbnail there's no way you are man. Real men aren't as sensitive and have thicker skin and we don't let social get to us like women do.
Requirements has shot up, regular / invisible men try to meet it to improve their chance on dating market, that's it bro, don't overthink or sugarcoat through political standpoint.
"patriarchal gender norms", "toxic echo chamber"...100% this commenter is a female sociology major, probably a sophomore. I predict she'll finally grow out of the marxist programming by 2040
Thank you for covering this topic, Caitlin! This isn't talked about enough. I told my husband these kinds of things weren't reality. Brendan Fraser and Hugh Jackman blacked out during filming due to dehydration six packs. Tom Holland went through micro electric shocks to get his abs looking a certain way. It's barbaric what men are put through for the "look" and I as a woman hate it. It's abuse plain and simple.
I am absolutely shocked I never knew anything about this. As a mother of a young son I am just terrified of what's to come in the future. When are all of us men and women going to just draw the line and be happy and proud that we are all unique and that is what makes us all beautiful ❤
Stop copemaxxing you have to allow your son to invest everything into looksmaxxing or else he will be miserable. Women in this generation only care about your physical appearance. They won’t give you the time of day if you are unattractive. Spare your son the suffering of being average or below which was me for most of my high school and middle school years. Never getting female attention until recently and I’m 18 but it’s too late I’ll never have the experience of being a guy that girls like in high school or having a prom date or first kiss at homecoming.
@@mariadaly4673 yeah that’s what they “should” do but nobody does what they should do in this world. The world will never conform to people’s individual needs the person has to adapt to the world or they won’t succeed. Either you look good and have success with women and positive affirmations in your social circle or you see a sub 5 who will never have romantic interactions and have to rot inside their basement for their whole life if they don’t hardmaxx
I have a couple of friends who are so gorgeous, men and women still watch them walk down the street (alone or together) even in their 60s. What they told their kids (son and daughter) when he was concerned about their looks. You don't need to be the person who values you for how you improve the scenery. You need the person who values you for how your presence improves their life.
I missed this video because I was travelling but omg can’t wait to watch this. As a guy I’m always getting targeted with these ads and then I went down into a rabbit hole of how crazy this is!!
Great video! Thank you! You've done an incredibly deep and thorough research on looksmaxxing. I've never heard of it before, but I swear it appears terrible and horrifying. God save our men!
Meh, people predominantly choose both short-term and long-term partners on the basis of looks, so it's only natural that you should obsess with how you look, because it's predominantly this quality that people are going to evaluate you on when deciding if they want to be your partner.
It's weird how people will refuse to go to a doctor or a therapist, and get help through a safer and more regulated channel. But will drop hundreds and thousands on these unregulated stuff like peptides and supplements of do risky things like bone smashing. The amount of blind faith in these strangers online that perpetuate these insecurities is wild.
@tylersdadx okay but doctors go through extensive schooling, clinicals and residence, plus they adhere to a board where they can loose their license and be sued for medical malpractice. These people aren't held to that same level of standard and scrutiny. It's therefore riskier and more costly down the road. EVERYTHING in life carries risk, so to say, "oh but this also has risk" is not fully valid as a reason. Therapy also isn't as expensive as people claim depending on different factors. But if you can afford to do these costly things that can be even more expensive upfront and down the road. You can get multiple sessions with a therapist. Besides, at least for me, my therapist is the same price as seeing my docto.
Just a common sense observation on the 15 yo starvemaxxing. He is growing. How is he supposed to heightmaxx if he isn’t giving himself the right amount of calories and nutrients? I mean starving yourself will stunt your growth. Especially at that age. Ok I felt stupid using those words lol
The thing about height is it’s not a dealbreaker but you’ll still be informed that taller is better somehow. I’m 5’8”. The girl I recently dated, who actually approached me first, told me after a couple months of seeing each other that when she was younger she would’ve never even noticed a guy my height. So even if you “get the girl” you still feel that she’d actually prefer someone taller.
My dude literally said he is 2 meters high and he is insecure about his height ... what? He is literally basketball player tall and he feels insecure about it. Like I'm sorry, but this is obviously not about height, not about your bone structure, not about your muscles, etc etc. These kids need therapy and I say that very lovingly. This aint right.
This is such a great video. I’ve watched so many of these look Maxing videos, but they have never gone into this much detail. I’ve learned so much more new things.
A lot parents aren’t doing their jobs at home, which is a good starting point to counteract these unhealthy behavior tendencies the youth are partaking
I think the most tragic thing about this trend is that they end up putting all this effort into themselves only to look pretty caricatural in the end. Not to mention that they develop a strong sense of superficiality which is not going to make their relationships, be it friendly or romantic, any easier.
Most romantic relationships are superficial. This is what all of the empirical research says on this topic. If people end up having less superficial relationships, where they have some compatibility with their partner in terms of personality, this is just by chance because all of the research suggests says that people predominantly pick partners on the basis of superficial characteristics, not things like personality.
I grew up on a remote farm, no television and no social media (im older...) and never knew that these things even existed before watching your videos. Exposing your kids to stuff like that and leaving them alone in a digital world is probably the best way to create insecurities that weren't there in the first place. btw Im 6'3" and 215 pounds, good shape and all... but you know what comes with being a tall man? Back and knee problems because you have to bent to do litterally everything. Teach your kids good values and self esteem. Live in the real world and care for what's really important. Family, childrens, health and you dont need much more. I'd be curious on how many of these mens grew without a strong father figure in the household
! 29:42 I birthed twin girls vaginally and I was worried about down there. My husband is as……enthusiastic lol he says it’s the same house just the furniture is rearranged. I feel bad for those other women who don’t have that
What does that even mean though ? Same house with furniture rearranged.. I’m 38 no children and honestly mine has changed so much with just simply age. I started noticing around age 35. Interesting how it is not really talked about the natural normal changes due to child birth and simply just the aging V.
Got 3 young kids, 2 boys, 8 and 4 (girl is 6.5), teach them to not live in other people’s opinions and eyes, just be good people, do good, learn and most importantly, be patient, work in your skills to succeed. Some things that matter to you now won’t in a few weeks, couple months… When you succeed doing things and learning things, you don’t care about the shape of your jaw or your teeth being crooked or far apart or whatever nor about what people think about you.
As a sensitive guy myself. The best thing that I did was to start weight training at the age of 14. It lowers stress, increases confidence and the increase in muscularity makes you carry yourself in a more masculine way. It's by far the easiest way for a boy to become a man in a healthy way.
Then raise him well to make sure he doesn't grow up to be a miserable little sh!t. make sure he eats healthy and sleeps well, make sure he stays fit, all in a balanced and healthy way ofc. Oh and if he starts showing signs of balding consider treating that too
Compelled to comment as I am a speech pathologist for 22 years and this has the potential to change speech clarity, plus the position of the larynx which can change pitch. Vocal cord surgery is 100% NOT SAFE and could leave permanent vocal cord paralysis and loss of all vocalisation (no sound produced at all!). People have Botox to the jaw for tight maxillary muscles that cause bruxism (teeth grinding) and hoarse voice, and breathy voice due to aphonic periods. This breaks my heart that young boys, who don’t finish developing their brain’s executive functions until age 25, are undertaking actions that may leave them with no voice at all in the worst case, or with voice quality or speech clarity requiring intense speech therapy, all in the name of looks. Mewing has been a speech therapy exercise for years due to the effects the activity can have on swallowing and voice function. These boys don’t know they risk future swallowing or voice impairment if they pursue some of the practices you’ve mentioned in an adhoc, ill informed manner. I’m so glad I saw this as I’m honestly thinking I should raise concerns with my professional association to maybe get the Australian Government to collaborate on an information awareness campaign (TH-cam ads maybe?) aimed at reaching vulnerable teens with constant access to social media. Can I please refer them to the information in your video? Thanks for your video as it may help spur action to prevent vulnerable young teens from developing swallowing and voice impairments! I am a Certified Practicing Speech Pathologist and member of Speech Pathology Australia for 22 years with significant additional training and qualifications in both voice and swallowing. Please let me know if I can refer to this video 🙏I think it will be vital in bringing attention to our Association’s management as you presented the information of concern in a well structured format and defined terminology and practices in an accessible way. I’d be so grateful for any chance to contact you re: research references that may help bolster my argument that our profession is uniquely positioned to petition for an awareness campaign over the significant dangers of these practices. Many thanks!
I’m also a Speech and Language Therapist in the UK and I 2nd everything said here. The trends seen here extremely disturbing the long term damaging effect to the facial structures vocal cords are not worth the procedures. 😢
Just to be clear. As a 5.2 girlie. A man being over six foot means nothing to me other than I need a step stool to kiss them lol and they can reach stuff I'd have to stand on the counter to get. Who gives a f about height... seems very shallow to me.
Even if you have preferences, it's usually a range that's attractive. And even then it the question if one really rejects someone only based ob that. The looks are more than one feature like height, jawline or whatever and a person is more than the looks.
I’ve never understood these short women wanting very tall men. I’m 5’7” and am dating a 5’6” dude. Height is sooo not even in the list of things I look for in a man lol
@@eunicee999they are trying to make up for their height maybe in hope that their kids won't end up as short as them, it's a deep rooted insecurity turned into a "preference"
Thanks for the detail in this video. My 10 year old son mentioned "mewing" and i kept saying "no it's pronounced meowing." 😂 I had no idea what mewing was. I'll definitely be taking this seriously now.
Many Many Congratulations Dear Caitlin on 70K Subscribers and I wish one day you will reach 100K Subscribers very very very soon🙈🥹🥹♥️ and today you are looking just beautiful
Female bodybuilder here, young men on roids worries me a lot. They don't respect protocols and aren't at all mindful of what they take and the long term implication of it. They go heavy on the gears and end up fucked at 30, injectables are already pretty harmful when used like this but SARMs are worse.
Thank you for this. I'm the parent of two teens and I will be sitting down and watching this video again with them. I will speak to them about self security, the virtue in pursuing intellect and creativity and the danger of consumerism. Our youth are being poisoned and as an older person looking in, I find it absolutely terrifying.
You don't need good personality when you have a good face. Haven't you heard of Ted Bundy, Charles Sobhraj, Richard Ramirez?? Also Jeremy Meeks. Try searching them and read about them. I used to think just what you said but when I read about them I realised looks>personality. That was the day my bubble bursted. The guys I have mentioned are literal serial killers.
*The lies don't work lady. Men know its all about looks first. Personality doesn't matter if you don't find him attractive. The sisterhood lies no longer work*
Why would they? This isn't a factor that has much bearing on whether or not people decide to date you, so it makes no sense to work on it to any substantive degree. Sure, you need a modicum of personality to be tolerable as a partner, but really not much. This just isn't anywhere near as important to people as physical appearance.
Congratulations on being free from addiction. It's something to be proud of. I hope that the focus for young guys will be what they want to do with their lives and role models who a participating in something that benefits the world. Be a plus for their local community, and learn something that isn't about them.
This makes me want to shield my babies from social media in the future. This is so sad and heartbreaking. My husband isn’t 6 foot tall he’s probably like 5”8 or so, and I’m only 4”11 so it works for us and I love his height. We’ve made 3 beautiful babies and they’re perfect.
I'm a 38yr-old single, mostly straight, cis woman and have completely opted out of the looks rat race. I buzzed my hair last September, don't wear makeup but for the extremely rare occasion, dress 80% androgynously and am just living my life without worrying what other people think about the way I look. The time, money, and energy I save as a result is really freeing
I know this is an old video but I just saw it and props to whoever put the *that's depressing* snipped it, it's from Once Bitten, one of my fave movies and an awesome 80s vampire movie with Jim Carey! ❤
This is just devastating. Breaks my heart for these poor boys and men. I wish I could convince them that with age/maturity comes perspective, and a realization that looks are fleeting and the MOST superficial form of attraction. I wish I could say that what you prioritize is what you attract. If you are shallow and only focus on the superficial, who do you think you will attract? I wish I could say that you need to grow into your body and, by the time you get a bit older, you start to care less about what “doesn’t fit a standard,” or can make a more balanced and considered decision if there is still something that REALLY bothers you. I wish I could tell them that some of the MOST attractive men I have even met in my life were not necessarily “conventionally attractive.” Their intelligence, wit, generosity, work ethic and loyalty were what made them unbelievably, irresistibly sexy. Give me a 5”8’ intellect with wicked humour over a 6”5’ Gigachad any day. Give me guy with a panty-dropping personality over a guy who smashes his face with a hammer. But I realize that’s probably a more “mature” perspective from an older millennial who never had social media growing up (still only have TH-cam) and had amazing influences like parents, etc. who taught me what matters in a husband. And I recognize parents are fighting a tough battle in the digital age. But it’s amazing when we step away from the excessive shallowness jammed down our brain stems on the internet, touch grass, meet people, realign our priorities with what really matters (less superficial “credentials”),… Suddenly men are seen for who they are and, in my experience, their physical appearance becomes simultaneously LESS important and MORE attractive, when the MOST important characteristics are prioritized. Thanks again for sharing! I had very little awareness in this topic.
We're just men giving women what they want because we understand the importance of being handsome and how it effects wether or not we'll get laid. We're tired of being the ugly guy watch the hot guys leave the club with all the girls so we've decided to become a hot guy so we can finally join in on the fun.
Problem is that younger women are more superficial. I had life on easy mode, I'm very attractive and getting the girl was as easy as saying I liked them. However, I've noticed a huge change from generation to generation and in 2017, things massively changed. Tinder started causing women's expectations to go through the roof. Now, here is the point where you attack me because I'm a man, thanks for the sexism. I worked in the fashion industry and I was surrounded by women of all ages and I can tell you exactly when it happened as I watched it in real time. I saw shy, innocent and kind women join the company, tell everyone they were going on Tinder and then 6 months later they are talking like a sailor about all the guys they've been with and how they think about guys and what their standards now are. I've seen it all, hundreds of times over from women of all ages and all levels of attractiveness. Tinder caused this.
looksmaxxing is a response to modern woman's superficiality, what are we supposed to do, be virgins forever? you're point of view is one of ignorance to young men's problems today and the harm social media has caused.
@@ruzzianbot They want us to suffer while they go around telling us that classic lie "youre handsome, im sure some girl will want you" right before the turn around and laugh. Women understand competing for hot guys which is why they get the BBL, lip fillers and acrylic nails but they find it repulsive if a ugly guy get surgery to become the hot guys they actually sleep with. They want us to watch from the sidelines as time flies and we miss out on all the fun
Mother of a 22 old young man. Only advise I could give is, spent time with your kids. Real time. No tv, no phone, nothing. Be open, be honest, do not judge. Let your kid know he is loved, cherished, let him know he can talk to you without you immediately judging or preaching. We do that often unconscious. Mind what you say but most of all. Spent time with your childeren. Quality time is so important. My boy is 22. Stable, healthy, non nonsense. He sees this idiocy and only shakes his head about it, knowing fully it is all bullshit.
I have no idea what is happening in this world as I don’t even use social media or the internet. I can’t imagine this whole world of pressure that thanks to the internet our most vulnerable teenagers will be exposed to before they have developed executive functioning skills and aren’t fully developed until age 25! This is making me terrified! Thanks your commentary brings my attention to these issues and still allows me to avoid the internet!!
I really want to say it's great that you've had this realization that men have struggles they don't speak about. Unfortunately a lot of men (especially the older ones) have been raised being told they should "man up" or some variation of that theme. What you see there is simply the result of this.
A man's perspective: none of this would be happening if any of these men were able to score a date. I repeat, this would literally end overnight if these men were selected for dating relationships. Due to iphones, social media, and online dating (2008), and their influence on society - 40% of men aged 18-30 are now virginal in the west. You read that correctly, almost half of all young men in the west have never had even 1 encounter. Whereas women in that age group are at around 8%. The reason is because of women's selectivity on dating apps. Only the best men get chosen. The top 60% of women match with the top 10% of men on dating apps. When a man cannot get a date, he starts to question himself and the world around him. Looks maxing is the only answer.
@@mrmoe110 and if we say the most likely method of success, people will critize it because it does not consider in acope the many exceptions to the rule. Thing is, most times there is no inherent solution.
There's nothing wrong with guys taking care of their appearance as long as they are pursuing natural improvements. Listening to both men and women acting like looks dont play a huge factor is laughable. Just pay attention to men and women's swiping on dating apps and you will see why men struggle. Granted, many factors beyond looks matter as well and you have to work on them too but you ladies set the tone for a lot of things.
Looks are by far the most important. I mean if you have a severe social impairment or something you're going to run into issues, but barring that, you can be the most boring person in the world - as long as you are good looking it doesn't matter.
If a guy squinted like that at me IRL, I'd squint back, but while making a funny face- like you gonna be an odd-ball weirdo to me I match that energy broski.
Interesting video! My 10 year old son, who is legitimately model good looking already (objectively, not just parental pride 😂) has already asked me several times if he’s ugly 😟 I’m so happy I grew up before social media ruined peoples self perception. When I grew up, the beauty standard was a much lower bar…just being moderately attractive, clean and presentable, and funny made you a catch 😂
Any time I start feeling insecure about turning 30 (which happens more often than it should), I've gotta remind myself that I'm LUCKY that I'm 30. I just know myself and I know that had I grown up in a time where we were chronically online and where there's such extreme beauty standards, I would've fallen RIGHT into that trap, and it would've been in a bad way. So next time I'm feeling like an irrelevant millennial, im just gonna learn in harder to my love for my skinny jeans and my side part.
Great video! I did just want to chime in and admit that my husband fell down the d*ck maxing rabbit hole right before Covid and it does actually work if you have the time to dedicate to the pursuit which was a lot easier when no one could leave the house lol. I think it essentially develops some of the small muscles and connective tissue in that specific area similar to lifting weights in general. There were also secondary benefits that I enjoyed more like longevity and something called “e.q.” that I’m not comfortable describing in the comments section but I’m sure it’s easily Googled if you want to know. He spent around 18 months or so where he really strictly adhered to the ‘program’. And even though that was about three years ago he still retained a lot of the growth (2.0” now 1.5”) So I know this is embarrassing to discuss but so many guys attach a lot of value to this particular region of the body and it can have a huge impact on self esteem so I did want to chime in and say it really can work because I was very skeptical in the beginning as most people probably are, but it does work and is much safer and effective than surgeries and injections.
Belt pulling might only work if you are still growing. But you would have to apply the force over hours and every day. It is safer to visit an orthodontic.
Thank you again for this information...I try to keep my child super aware of how fake these platforms so they know not to compare themselves and take it for what it is. I worry for everyone's children in this narrative. Our children are so unique and beautiful I wish we could plaster that reality all over the internet.
The only thing that beats my insecurities is my laziness to do anything about it :D But on a more serious note, quite a lot of these boys, especially the more extreme ones, on these forums displays symptoms of body dysmorphic disorder, a clinical disorder that shares some underlying characteristic with anorexia nervosa. Good for you to highlight this later on in the video. For people who suffer from BDD, a cosmetic surgery doesn’t solve their insecurities as the focus of perceived deficit will shift to a different part of the body/bodypart they are obsessing with.
I feel its important to mention that it's the healing of MICROfractures (such as those formed by activities such as running or parkour or gymnastics) that cause the bone to grow back stronger, and that it's a process that happens over years of getting small micro fractures and having them heal for the bone to strengthen. Also, I would be incredibly apprised if the medical studies they used were about facial bones and not the limbs, and as previously stated, may not be relevant to the fractures created by bonesmashing.
WTH is wrong with these ppl,encouraging a child to starve himself is disgusting. Social media has completely messed up this generation, it's so sad to witness as an 80s child who didn't have all this pressure to look a certain way.😢😢
Canthal tilt is just the male version of the Foxy Eye trend. These kids need to find a hobby and develop themselves to provide real value to the world their careers and society. Wayyyyyyyy too much time on their hands and too much time spent looking in the mirror and their phones.
As a survivor of Ana ED - starvemaxxing is just having Ana and giving a more masculine sounding name. It breaks my heart to see young men going through the same pressures and tortures I and many other women did in the 2000s.
Part of what is making some of this is that all of our media is 2d. At some point when 3d becomes standard some of these trends will die or change. As a simple example, I saw a celebrity being discussed who was a beautiful woman. However, she was girl next door beautiful, which meant her features were flattened on video. She got plastic surgery tweaks to make her features more defined. And then she was better received.
A bit late to the party but being a guy with insecurities just means that you never feel enough, I think a lot of women can relate to this but I still feel like it it just hits harder for younger men. As with the rise of social media came about a huge increase in these "influencers" who kind of try to monetize our insecurities, every day I see new statistics that just make me feel hopeless abt how guys under a certain height just have it harder or about how women only go for guys with certain attributes. This in combination with other problems (economic and politic) push guys to try and "fix" at least a single part of their life which results in looksmaxxing
Ok i must say that you went 100 to 0 with these things, most guys that want to better themselves would never “whitemax”. At best most guys that care about looksmaxxing would get a skincare, gym, get a haircut, lower body fat to 15-10%, change their style and get a stubble. Those forums are full of extremists but most content on TH-cam for example is all about softmaxxing and not hardmaxxing.
There is a saying, it rings true in my experience. "It's not the size of the ship, it is the motion of the ocean." -- you can be 12 in and still not get her to achieve the "goal" and achieving the goal is really all we care about.
I’ve been aware of the Incel community for 10 years. In fact, I used to kind of follow a guy that wasn’t in cell and talked about all the stuff but he wasn’t in so anymore he had started like working out and taking care of himself and not staying online as much, so he still was sort of in the community so he was trying to be a positive touch stone for other people that were like him when he was younger his name was based Shaman online
To this day, at 34 years old and married, I’ve never understood these insane height requirements girls/women have. The super short girl who said a guy “has to be” 6’6”?!?! Does she not understand the possible physical incompatibilities she could have with a man that tall?? 🥴 As a 5’2” woman, I dated a 6’2” guy once and after that I preferred guys 5’10” and under. Not that it was a deal-breaker, and the relationship with the taller guy didn’t end because of his height (obv). But a lot of physical… activities are much easier to enjoy when there isn’t a whole foot of height difference between us. And it’s for sure a bonus that my man isn’t breaking his back bending over to kiss me, and I also don’t have to be in heels or on tip-toe to reach him all the time 😅 Just my 2 cents 🤷🏻♀️
I have been teased, even, physically, challenged about my masculinity due to my high voice, which have led to people assuming I must be gay or effeminate. I HATE to hear my voice. I don't listen to voice recording. voice messages I leave for people, I NEVER took voice notes at Uni., even today post 40s I still dislike my high voice but NEVER considered surgery. Vocal lessons, yes, singling lessons, sure, acting and how to throw ones' voice, definitely, SURGERY!!!! HELL NAH!!
0:20 even more insane for men? I don't think so. Everything I've seen in the video so far, you could find the equivalent or worse for women. I think women still have more pressure beauty wise, and men have more pressure money wise.
"...men have more pressure money wise." Women predominantly select their partners on the basis of their partners' physical attractiveness, to the same extent as men. Money is almost irrelevant for attracting women you want.
@@No_co_OK Most women are willing to bargain and compromise. Clearly we have eyes, ideal would be that he has both looks and money, but if the guy is broke, unless the girl has the lowest self esteem, she's definitely ditching him. That's why women are called "gold diggers" all the time including in pop music
@@rainforest.4577 What you're saying makes no sense. They don't need to compromise for someone that is not good looking because they can just date someone who is. And income is just nowhere near as important a factor for attracting a partner as looks. What you're saying is just not substantiated by empirical research.
@@No_co_OK What you're saying makes no sense because I see it around me, women married to unattractive men. And I'm a woman myself. Women have always been about ressources first. Why do you think men try to impress them with money? There's always going to be "studied" aligning with whatever we want. I'm looking at real life. Young girls will drool over hot boys, but women who seek marriage will favor financial security first. Your manospheric looxmax beliefs are laughable at best. Most happily married men aren't even attractive. Most hot men get rejected bc women don't trust them, even with money it's a challenge for them, they complain about it constantly.
@@rainforest.4577 "What you're saying makes no sense because I see it around me, women married to unattractive men." Anecdotal evidence. "...but women who seek marriage will favor financial security first. " Not what the research says. Sorry, you're just making things up.
Looksmaxxing is not only for men, it's for all people, men and women, you can call it glow up or self imrpove or anything you like, in the end it's the way to be the best version of yourself, lookmaxx was considered somthing only for men because everyone who talks about it are men, the reason is due to the difficulty of attracting a hot girls, while women have it easier, because men will fvck anything, so please women, have a certain awareness when talking about a topic
There's a serious lack of soul in this world; we're in superficiality overload.
People are superficial by nature, pretty privilege didn't exist just now, it exists with the existence of humsns
90% the fault of postmodern women.
It’s an unfortunate reflection of how people really are
So wanting to take care of yourself is soulless? Interesting take
@@JaySnow-c8u it is if you're going to massive extremes!!!
With every day that I'm getting older, I'm becoming happier with growing up during the 80s and 90s.
The years before things hit the fan 😂😅
Amen!!!!!❤❤❤ I actually love my imperfect body ❤
We didn’t have to compare ourselves to anybody but movie stars. And we had to watch movies or buy magazines to look at them. No one got boob jobs or other Plastic surgery as a norm, MEN AND WOMEN WERE ALLOWED TO HAVE BODY HAIR. The world is broken.
Same. Those were the decades when there was perhaps least pressure for any sick beauty ideals.
Same!
Loving that Catlin is bringing up the other side of this issue! Its so easy to think of body issues as being a female only problem the more we talk about this the easier it will be to center self-acceptance and non-judgement! (Also congrats on 70k) 🎉
Thankyou so much Ella ❤️
As someone who finished their first year of psychology and sociology, I do think mental health issues regarding the body and social media are a genuine concern. It's why I uninstalled all social media like tiktok and instagram, because of the rotting of my perception of what's real and what's not. It's made me 'wake up' about the reality of my appearance. At first, it was hard because I thought I was getting ugly lol but it was actually because I was no longer enhancing my photos and using filters all the time. I had to get used to seeing my ACTUAL self which isn't necessarily ugly but isn't a fake version of myself. I'm starting to see how pretty I actually am, so I probably won't engage with instagram or tiktok again.
This is so interesting and I think its more common than we are willing to admit Thankyou for raising this
@@CaitlinPawlowski mewing actually works lol I've always have a bad underbite and it massively improves your teeth alignment and double chin. I found out about it before 'looksmaxing' became a thing, it originates from a real dentist. The results in the tiktok videos are hugely obviously overstated, but for mouth posture its very useful.
Just finished the vid and wowww, i didnt know how deep the rabbit hole went
You look fine. If you spent a day single, it would be because you wanted to.
That's ass shaking worthy news.... excuse me ,😊 ALEXA!!!!!! IM TRYNA GET NASTY!!!!!😂...Playing NASTY by Tinashe
@@Llkoliigenerally I think mewing was started by a dentist to build good habits to prevent mouth breathing, which can lead to sleep problems and sinus/breathing issues.
I’m proud that you threw away your luxury shopping addiction. You don’t need to wear expensive stuff to be happy.
Yes! Thank you!
All of this is sad as hell. I know no guys are likely to read this but: I'm happily married to a balding 5'6" man who is smart and kind and I think he's gorgeous. It's not about what other sad isolated men tell you, it's about who you are and how you relate to others, women, and men, and children, that makes you a person who's good to be around and frankly loveable.
I love this Thankyou ❤️
I'm so sick of these 5'0 women talking about 6'0 guys!!!!
No offense but you being happily married or married to a balding guy is not a unicorn, women have been thought to look at personality over looks ,so it's more common to see a beautiful woman next to a man that's not physically attractive,
Not offense,but you being happily married or being married to a balding guy is not a unicorn,women have been thought to prioritize personality over looks when it comes to men,while being told to look physically good for men ,so what you are doing is the norm not surprising
@@purplelove3666 Yet somehow these poor young men end up convinced that they have to hurt themselves so badly physically, while not prioritizing their mental health and personality! It's a real problem of messaging.
Thank you for this video!! As a mama of a almost teen boy.....it is heartbreaking to hear some of these "trends"! Thank you for bringing these to light and making others aware!
Don't give birth to ugly person and he will not blame you for his genetics
They should start smartmaxxing
👏
Some might turn even that toxic. As Caitlin mentions the idea behind many of these things isn't bad but how it's executed, ouch. And I'm afraid that some take that seriously 😲 E.g. the guy who didn't eat for one or two days. Bro, your body is flashing the "low battery" warning light! Get some fuel!
Or valuemaxxing: developing themselves to provide ACTUAL value to the world, society, their careers, family and friends. Theses kids are lost 😢
The whole world needs it !!! 🤓
😂😂😂😂😂
Great vid! I'm a man and think a big issue is as a man we're shamed for talking about our insecurities due to largely patriarchal gender norms. As someone who is also in their early 30s I was deeply insecure, skinny, average heighted guy throughout my teens and early 20s. Never really had luck with girls until I was like in my mid 20s so I just carried on. I always say if I had access as a teenager to these communities it would've easily radicalized me, so I'm glad I grew up in a time where these communities didn't really exist or were readily accessible. Now that I'm 30, it's hard to tell a other younger men that things get better, when they feel constantly rejected and can't talk about it other than in a toxic echo chamber.
My life is pretty great now with a loving partner who I find beautiful, good job, etc, it just took longer to get there.
Thankyou for sharing your experience as a man ☺️
@sighswoons with that thumbnail there's no way you are man. Real men aren't as sensitive and have thicker skin and we don't let social get to us like women do.
Wtf
Requirements has shot up, regular / invisible men try to meet it to improve their chance on dating market, that's it bro, don't overthink or sugarcoat through political standpoint.
"patriarchal gender norms", "toxic echo chamber"...100% this commenter is a female sociology major, probably a sophomore. I predict she'll finally grow out of the marxist programming by 2040
You are a highly empathetic and intelligent individual. This is an excellent video.
Thank you for covering this topic, Caitlin! This isn't talked about enough. I told my husband these kinds of things weren't reality.
Brendan Fraser and Hugh Jackman blacked out during filming due to dehydration six packs. Tom Holland went through micro electric shocks to get his abs looking a certain way. It's barbaric what men are put through for the "look" and I as a woman hate it. It's abuse plain and simple.
I am 44 and scared for them. Starvemaxxing, bonesmashing🤦♀️🤦♀️
The starvemaxxing is just pro-anna content aimed at men. I thought we left heroine chiqe in the 00s? It's absolutely concerning
@@KeaganZ2737everything from 00's is coming back.
@@KeaganZ2737my thoughts exactly, just pro ana but make it "manly" bc of the feminine stereotype of anorexia (and eating disorders in general).
And theyre young like under 18 and still growing, so body is stressed and harmed in the process.
Thank you for your very detailed video. I think this is a very important topic for men especially if they are silently suffering.
I agree!
Thankyou so much for watching
I am absolutely shocked I never knew anything about this. As a mother of a young son I am just terrified of what's to come in the future. When are all of us men and women going to just draw the line and be happy and proud that we are all unique and that is what makes us all beautiful ❤
Stop copemaxxing you have to allow your son to invest everything into looksmaxxing or else he will be miserable. Women in this generation only care about your physical appearance. They won’t give you the time of day if you are unattractive. Spare your son the suffering of being average or below which was me for most of my high school and middle school years. Never getting female attention until recently and I’m 18 but it’s too late I’ll never have the experience of being a guy that girls like in high school or having a prom date or first kiss at homecoming.
People who have nothing nice to say should just say nothing at all
@@mariadaly4673 yeah that’s what they “should” do but nobody does what they should do in this world. The world will never conform to people’s individual needs the person has to adapt to the world or they won’t succeed. Either you look good and have success with women and positive affirmations in your social circle or you see a sub 5 who will never have romantic interactions and have to rot inside their basement for their whole life if they don’t hardmaxx
I have a couple of friends who are so gorgeous, men and women still watch them walk down the street (alone or together) even in their 60s. What they told their kids (son and daughter) when he was concerned about their looks. You don't need to be the person who values you for how you improve the scenery. You need the person who values you for how your presence improves their life.
OK, so they dated each other because they were good-looking. What's your point?
I missed this video because I was travelling but omg can’t wait to watch this. As a guy I’m always getting targeted with these ads and then I went down into a rabbit hole of how crazy this is!!
Great video! Thank you! You've done an incredibly deep and thorough research on looksmaxxing. I've never heard of it before, but I swear it appears terrible and horrifying. God save our men!
Thankyou so much for watching ❤️
I think once someone (male or female) starts down this road, they will keep finding things to "fix" and never be satisfied with their body.
Meh, people predominantly choose both short-term and long-term partners on the basis of looks, so it's only natural that you should obsess with how you look, because it's predominantly this quality that people are going to evaluate you on when deciding if they want to be your partner.
@@No_co_OK *"people predominantly choose both short-term and long-term partners on the basis of looks"*
Citation needed.
I'm tired of what social media is doing to us.
I agree!! We should fcuk to solidify our mutual hatred for social media,🍆
Social media ?? Keep being delulu
Got nothing to do with social media. People picking their partners on the basis of appearance precedes the advent of social media.
It's weird how people will refuse to go to a doctor or a therapist, and get help through a safer and more regulated channel. But will drop hundreds and thousands on these unregulated stuff like peptides and supplements of do risky things like bone smashing. The amount of blind faith in these strangers online that perpetuate these insecurities is wild.
It’s absolutely crazy
Thanks for watching!
Looksmaxxing is free
Bone smashing? That sounds nasty.
Trusting a doctor is blind faith too. Therapists are risky for the wallet.
@tylersdadx okay but doctors go through extensive schooling, clinicals and residence, plus they adhere to a board where they can loose their license and be sued for medical malpractice. These people aren't held to that same level of standard and scrutiny. It's therefore riskier and more costly down the road. EVERYTHING in life carries risk, so to say, "oh but this also has risk" is not fully valid as a reason. Therapy also isn't as expensive as people claim depending on different factors. But if you can afford to do these costly things that can be even more expensive upfront and down the road. You can get multiple sessions with a therapist. Besides, at least for me, my therapist is the same price as seeing my docto.
Just a common sense observation on the 15 yo starvemaxxing. He is growing. How is he supposed to heightmaxx if he isn’t giving himself the right amount of calories and nutrients? I mean starving yourself will stunt your growth. Especially at that age.
Ok I felt stupid using those words lol
The thing about height is it’s not a dealbreaker but you’ll still be informed that taller is better somehow. I’m 5’8”. The girl I recently dated, who actually approached me first, told me after a couple months of seeing each other that when she was younger she would’ve never even noticed a guy my height. So even if you “get the girl” you still feel that she’d actually prefer someone taller.
Our society has devolved to new sad lows. 😒
My dude literally said he is 2 meters high and he is insecure about his height ... what? He is literally basketball player tall and he feels insecure about it. Like I'm sorry, but this is obviously not about height, not about your bone structure, not about your muscles, etc etc. These kids need therapy and I say that very lovingly. This aint right.
Looksmaxxing community already knows
This is like a teacher finding out about looksmaxxing i was listening to this with a grin on the whole time loool hilarious
real
Most women rate men below average. I'm not really surprised this trend became more popular as of recent...
Omg! This is sick and scary!! I didn’t know there is such a thing😢 Heartbreaking😰
This is such a great video. I’ve watched so many of these look Maxing videos, but they have never gone into this much detail. I’ve learned so much more new things.
A lot parents aren’t doing their jobs at home, which is a good starting point to counteract these unhealthy behavior tendencies the youth are partaking
I think the most tragic thing about this trend is that they end up putting all this effort into themselves only to look pretty caricatural in the end. Not to mention that they develop a strong sense of superficiality which is not going to make their relationships, be it friendly or romantic, any easier.
Most romantic relationships are superficial. This is what all of the empirical research says on this topic. If people end up having less superficial relationships, where they have some compatibility with their partner in terms of personality, this is just by chance because all of the research suggests says that people predominantly pick partners on the basis of superficial characteristics, not things like personality.
Reminds me of the pro ana/mia tips and tricks forums i used to frequent when i was a teenager
More and more women are starting to see men's issues and hear men when they talk about their struggles. This is awesome. Thank you for the video.
No many women say this is men insecurity I don't think so
The ideal look is a changing style. Imagine getting surgery or braking your own facial bones and then the stule passes.
Chiseled jawline and being tall will never go out of style, agree that smashing bones is stupid tho
I love how he told him, “ I do agree with the theory but I don’t agree with your concept” before walking away
15:31 I’m black & im cackling lmaoooooooo love you girl
This is sad. The only maxxing anyone should be doing is shopping at TJ Maxx.
I grew up on a remote farm, no television and no social media (im older...) and never knew that these things even existed before watching your videos. Exposing your kids to stuff like that and leaving them alone in a digital world is probably the best way to create insecurities that weren't there in the first place.
btw Im 6'3" and 215 pounds, good shape and all... but you know what comes with being a tall man? Back and knee problems because you have to bent to do litterally everything.
Teach your kids good values and self esteem. Live in the real world and care for what's really important. Family, childrens, health and you dont need much more. I'd be curious on how many of these mens grew without a strong father figure in the household
! 29:42 I birthed twin girls vaginally and I was worried about down there. My husband is as……enthusiastic lol he says it’s the same house just the furniture is rearranged. I feel bad for those other women who don’t have that
What does that even mean though ? Same house with furniture rearranged.. I’m 38 no children and honestly mine has changed so much with just simply age. I started noticing around age 35. Interesting how it is not really talked about the natural normal changes due to child birth and simply just the aging V.
Got 3 young kids, 2 boys, 8 and 4 (girl is 6.5), teach them to not live in other people’s opinions and eyes, just be good people, do good, learn and most importantly, be patient, work in your skills to succeed. Some things that matter to you now won’t in a few weeks, couple months… When you succeed doing things and learning things, you don’t care about the shape of your jaw or your teeth being crooked or far apart or whatever nor about what people think about you.
As a mother to a 10 yr old sensitive son this scares the 💩 out of me 😢😢😢😢
As a sensitive guy myself. The best thing that I did was to start weight training at the age of 14. It lowers stress, increases confidence and the increase in muscularity makes you carry yourself in a more masculine way. It's by far the easiest way for a boy to become a man in a healthy way.
Teach him to not be jealous of women
Then raise him well to make sure he doesn't grow up to be a miserable little sh!t. make sure he eats healthy and sleeps well, make sure he stays fit, all in a balanced and healthy way ofc. Oh and if he starts showing signs of balding consider treating that too
Compelled to comment as I am a speech pathologist for 22 years and this has the potential to change speech clarity, plus the position of the larynx which can change pitch. Vocal cord surgery is 100% NOT SAFE and could leave permanent vocal cord paralysis and loss of all vocalisation (no sound produced at all!). People have Botox to the jaw for tight maxillary muscles that cause bruxism (teeth grinding) and hoarse voice, and breathy voice due to aphonic periods. This breaks my heart that young boys, who don’t finish developing their brain’s executive functions until age 25, are undertaking actions that may leave them with no voice at all in the worst case, or with voice quality or speech clarity requiring intense speech therapy, all in the name of looks. Mewing has been a speech therapy exercise for years due to the effects the activity can have on swallowing and voice function. These boys don’t know they risk future swallowing or voice impairment if they pursue some of the practices you’ve mentioned in an adhoc, ill informed manner. I’m so glad I saw this as I’m honestly thinking I should raise concerns with my professional association to maybe get the Australian Government to collaborate on an information awareness campaign (TH-cam ads maybe?) aimed at reaching vulnerable teens with constant access to social media. Can I please refer them to the information in your video? Thanks for your video as it may help spur action to prevent vulnerable young teens from developing swallowing and voice impairments! I am a Certified Practicing Speech Pathologist and member of Speech Pathology Australia for 22 years with significant additional training and qualifications in both voice and swallowing. Please let me know if I can refer to this video 🙏I think it will be vital in bringing attention to our Association’s management as you presented the information of concern in a well structured format and defined terminology and practices in an accessible way. I’d be so grateful for any chance to contact you re: research references that may help bolster my argument that our profession is uniquely positioned to petition for an awareness campaign over the significant dangers of these practices. Many thanks!
I’m also a Speech and Language Therapist in the UK and I 2nd everything said here. The trends seen here extremely disturbing the long term damaging effect to the facial structures vocal cords are not worth the procedures. 😢
thank you for your genuineness and for the great content! It’s very much appreciated I learned so many new vocabulary! ✨
Just to be clear. As a 5.2 girlie. A man being over six foot means nothing to me other than I need a step stool to kiss them lol and they can reach stuff I'd have to stand on the counter to get. Who gives a f about height... seems very shallow to me.
Totally agree 5’0 myself and people that are 5’7 seem tall to me! To pick and choose a partner based off height is so odd.
Even if you have preferences, it's usually a range that's attractive. And even then it the question if one really rejects someone only based ob that.
The looks are more than one feature like height, jawline or whatever and a person is more than the looks.
I know! It's ridiculous when short women talk about the tallest guys!!!
I’ve never understood these short women wanting very tall men. I’m 5’7” and am dating a 5’6” dude. Height is sooo not even in the list of things I look for in a man lol
@@eunicee999they are trying to make up for their height maybe in hope that their kids won't end up as short as them, it's a deep rooted insecurity turned into a "preference"
This video was well done. Thank you!
Thanks for the detail in this video. My 10 year old son mentioned "mewing" and i kept saying "no it's pronounced meowing." 😂 I had no idea what mewing was. I'll definitely be taking this seriously now.
Many Many Congratulations Dear Caitlin on 70K Subscribers and I wish one day you will reach 100K Subscribers very very very soon🙈🥹🥹♥️ and today you are looking just beautiful
Thank you so much 😀 you are so sweet 🥹 ❤️❤️ I hope you’re having a wonderful week!
😂😂 the squinting. Why?? People are killing off their beautiful unique features and it’s so sad.
Female bodybuilder here, young men on roids worries me a lot. They don't respect protocols and aren't at all mindful of what they take and the long term implication of it. They go heavy on the gears and end up fucked at 30, injectables are already pretty harmful when used like this but SARMs are worse.
Thank you for this. I'm the parent of two teens and I will be sitting down and watching this video again with them. I will speak to them about self security, the virtue in pursuing intellect and creativity and the danger of consumerism. Our youth are being poisoned and as an older person looking in, I find it absolutely terrifying.
I wish people put this much effort into their personalities
You don't need good personality when you have a good face. Haven't you heard of Ted Bundy, Charles Sobhraj, Richard Ramirez?? Also Jeremy Meeks. Try searching them and read about them. I used to think just what you said but when I read about them I realised looks>personality. That was the day my bubble bursted. The guys I have mentioned are literal serial killers.
Then why don’t you date some of the men in your friendzone since personality matter?
@@rigojin2615facts they are all terrible people but get women want them simply for there looks jfl. Personality only matters after the looks
*The lies don't work lady. Men know its all about looks first. Personality doesn't matter if you don't find him attractive. The sisterhood lies no longer work*
Why would they? This isn't a factor that has much bearing on whether or not people decide to date you, so it makes no sense to work on it to any substantive degree. Sure, you need a modicum of personality to be tolerable as a partner, but really not much. This just isn't anywhere near as important to people as physical appearance.
If you do not teach our precious youth to stand for something, they will fall for everything.
Congratulations on being free from addiction. It's something to be proud of.
I hope that the focus for young guys will be what they want to do with their lives and role models who a participating in something that benefits the world. Be a plus for their local community, and learn something that isn't about them.
It’s time for us to see our individual beauty just enhances our collective beauty. Love ourselves. We are miracles.
Thank you for sharing this super interesting! Honestly I felt like an 80 year old, I had no idea!!
This makes me want to shield my babies from social media in the future. This is so sad and heartbreaking. My husband isn’t 6 foot tall he’s probably like 5”8 or so, and I’m only 4”11 so it works for us and I love his height. We’ve made 3 beautiful babies and they’re perfect.
I'm a 38yr-old single, mostly straight, cis woman and have completely opted out of the looks rat race. I buzzed my hair last September, don't wear makeup but for the extremely rare occasion, dress 80% androgynously and am just living my life without worrying what other people think about the way I look. The time, money, and energy I save as a result is really freeing
I know this is an old video but I just saw it and props to whoever put the *that's depressing* snipped it, it's from Once Bitten, one of my fave movies and an awesome 80s vampire movie with Jim Carey! ❤
Man said hes 198cm saying thats "short" is fucking crazy at that point 8feet is considered just right 😂😂
Maybe foids shouldn't write books about 7'2 guys. Also he's fucking larping.
This is just devastating. Breaks my heart for these poor boys and men. I wish I could convince them that with age/maturity comes perspective, and a realization that looks are fleeting and the MOST superficial form of attraction. I wish I could say that what you prioritize is what you attract. If you are shallow and only focus on the superficial, who do you think you will attract? I wish I could say that you need to grow into your body and, by the time you get a bit older, you start to care less about what “doesn’t fit a standard,” or can make a more balanced and considered decision if there is still something that REALLY bothers you.
I wish I could tell them that some of the MOST attractive men I have even met in my life were not necessarily “conventionally attractive.” Their intelligence, wit, generosity, work ethic and loyalty were what made them unbelievably, irresistibly sexy. Give me a 5”8’ intellect with wicked humour over a 6”5’ Gigachad any day. Give me guy with a panty-dropping personality over a guy who smashes his face with a hammer.
But I realize that’s probably a more “mature” perspective from an older millennial who never had social media growing up (still only have TH-cam) and had amazing influences like parents, etc. who taught me what matters in a husband. And I recognize parents are fighting a tough battle in the digital age. But it’s amazing when we step away from the excessive shallowness jammed down our brain stems on the internet, touch grass, meet people, realign our priorities with what really matters (less superficial “credentials”),… Suddenly men are seen for who they are and, in my experience, their physical appearance becomes simultaneously LESS important and MORE attractive, when the MOST important characteristics are prioritized.
Thanks again for sharing! I had very little awareness in this topic.
Thankyou for sharing this I hope your comment reaches more people ❤️
We're just men giving women what they want because we understand the importance of being handsome and how it effects wether or not we'll get laid. We're tired of being the ugly guy watch the hot guys leave the club with all the girls so we've decided to become a hot guy so we can finally join in on the fun.
Problem is that younger women are more superficial. I had life on easy mode, I'm very attractive and getting the girl was as easy as saying I liked them. However, I've noticed a huge change from generation to generation and in 2017, things massively changed. Tinder started causing women's expectations to go through the roof. Now, here is the point where you attack me because I'm a man, thanks for the sexism. I worked in the fashion industry and I was surrounded by women of all ages and I can tell you exactly when it happened as I watched it in real time. I saw shy, innocent and kind women join the company, tell everyone they were going on Tinder and then 6 months later they are talking like a sailor about all the guys they've been with and how they think about guys and what their standards now are. I've seen it all, hundreds of times over from women of all ages and all levels of attractiveness. Tinder caused this.
looksmaxxing is a response to modern woman's superficiality, what are we supposed to do, be virgins forever? you're point of view is one of ignorance to young men's problems today and the harm social media has caused.
@@ruzzianbot They want us to suffer while they go around telling us that classic lie
"youre handsome, im sure some girl will want you" right before the turn around and laugh.
Women understand competing for hot guys which is why they get the BBL, lip fillers and acrylic nails but they find it repulsive if a ugly guy get surgery to become the hot guys they actually sleep with. They want us to watch from the sidelines as time flies and we miss out on all the fun
Mother of a 22 old young man. Only advise I could give is, spent time with your kids. Real time. No tv, no phone, nothing. Be open, be honest, do not judge. Let your kid know he is loved, cherished, let him know he can talk to you without you immediately judging or preaching. We do that often unconscious. Mind what you say but most of all. Spent time with your childeren. Quality time is so important.
My boy is 22. Stable, healthy, non nonsense. He sees this idiocy and only shakes his head about it, knowing fully it is all bullshit.
I suppose that I do live under a rock since I had no idea that this even existed! Consider my mind completely blown 🤯
I have no idea what is happening in this world as I don’t even use social media or the internet. I can’t imagine this whole world of pressure that thanks to the internet our most vulnerable teenagers will be exposed to before they have developed executive functioning skills and aren’t fully developed until age 25! This is making me terrified! Thanks your commentary brings my attention to these issues and still allows me to avoid the internet!!
You don't use social media? 🤔
‘Pretty hip’ 😂
😂
I really want to say it's great that you've had this realization that men have struggles they don't speak about.
Unfortunately a lot of men (especially the older ones) have been raised being told they should "man up" or some variation of that theme. What you see there is simply the result of this.
I'm a proud unattractive male. Women ignore me so I get to keep my money to myself. I do not envy the attractive male. I only wish you godspeed
That's wild
A man's perspective: none of this would be happening if any of these men were able to score a date. I repeat, this would literally end overnight if these men were selected for dating relationships.
Due to iphones, social media, and online dating (2008), and their influence on society - 40% of men aged 18-30 are now virginal in the west. You read that correctly, almost half of all young men in the west have never had even 1 encounter. Whereas women in that age group are at around 8%.
The reason is because of women's selectivity on dating apps. Only the best men get chosen. The top 60% of women match with the top 10% of men on dating apps.
When a man cannot get a date, he starts to question himself and the world around him. Looks maxing is the only answer.
Yep, optimize, adapt and overcome
Exactly this. People will say “ohhh it’s so sad that these guys have to deal with this.” But don’t say anything about what the real solution is.
@@mrmoe110 that's because men's problems aren't as significant as women's problems. Women go through a lot more.
Also, there are more men on dating apps
@@mrmoe110 and if we say the most likely method of success, people will critize it because it does not consider in acope the many exceptions to the rule.
Thing is, most times there is no inherent solution.
There's nothing wrong with guys taking care of their appearance as long as they are pursuing natural improvements. Listening to both men and women acting like looks dont play a huge factor is laughable. Just pay attention to men and women's swiping on dating apps and you will see why men struggle. Granted, many factors beyond looks matter as well and you have to work on them too but you ladies set the tone for a lot of things.
BUT looks are the most important. That is why for many men like me, it's the only option to... well... maxximize our chances of success in dating
It's mostly looks
*Looks are 90%*
Looks are by far the most important. I mean if you have a severe social impairment or something you're going to run into issues, but barring that, you can be the most boring person in the world - as long as you are good looking it doesn't matter.
@ *"as long as you are good looking it doesn't matter."*
Citation needed.
If a guy squinted like that at me IRL, I'd squint back, but while making a funny face- like you gonna be an odd-ball weirdo to me I match that energy broski.
Interesting video! My 10 year old son, who is legitimately model good looking already (objectively, not just parental pride 😂) has already asked me several times if he’s ugly 😟 I’m so happy I grew up before social media ruined peoples self perception. When I grew up, the beauty standard was a much lower bar…just being moderately attractive, clean and presentable, and funny made you a catch 😂
Any time I start feeling insecure about turning 30 (which happens more often than it should), I've gotta remind myself that I'm LUCKY that I'm 30. I just know myself and I know that had I grown up in a time where we were chronically online and where there's such extreme beauty standards, I would've fallen RIGHT into that trap, and it would've been in a bad way. So next time I'm feeling like an irrelevant millennial, im just gonna learn in harder to my love for my skinny jeans and my side part.
Now this is educational HAHAH thanks for the vid 😆😆
Glad you enjoyed it! ☺️
Great video! I did just want to chime in and admit that my husband fell down the d*ck maxing rabbit hole right before Covid and it does actually work if you have the time to dedicate to the pursuit which was a lot easier when no one could leave the house lol.
I think it essentially develops some of the small muscles and connective tissue in that specific area similar to lifting weights in general.
There were also secondary benefits that I enjoyed more like longevity and something called “e.q.” that I’m not comfortable describing in the comments section but I’m sure it’s easily Googled if you want to know.
He spent around 18 months or so where he really strictly adhered to the ‘program’. And even though that was about three years ago he still retained a lot of the growth (2.0” now 1.5”)
So I know this is embarrassing to discuss but so many guys attach a lot of value to this particular region of the body and it can have a huge impact on self esteem so I did want to chime in and say it really can work because I was very skeptical in the beginning as most people probably are, but it does work and is much safer and effective than surgeries and injections.
I just found your channel.. and omg I'm in love. Binging ALL your content. ❤
I’m absolutely cooked bro
over
Belt pulling might only work if you are still growing. But you would have to apply the force over hours and every day. It is safer to visit an orthodontic.
I’m over here shaking my head, and kinda laughing a bit, at the same time seriously contemplating the craziness of this reality….
This is a great video
Thank you again for this information...I try to keep my child super aware of how fake these platforms so they know not to compare themselves and take it for what it is. I worry for everyone's children in this narrative. Our children are so unique and beautiful I wish we could plaster that reality all over the internet.
The only thing that beats my insecurities is my laziness to do anything about it :D
But on a more serious note, quite a lot of these boys, especially the more extreme ones, on these forums displays symptoms of body dysmorphic disorder, a clinical disorder that shares some underlying characteristic with anorexia nervosa. Good for you to highlight this later on in the video. For people who suffer from BDD, a cosmetic surgery doesn’t solve their insecurities as the focus of perceived deficit will shift to a different part of the body/bodypart they are obsessing with.
Personality > Looks is what these people need to stumble upon on.
Great video very informative. Thank you.
I feel its important to mention that it's the healing of MICROfractures (such as those formed by activities such as running or parkour or gymnastics) that cause the bone to grow back stronger, and that it's a process that happens over years of getting small micro fractures and having them heal for the bone to strengthen. Also, I would be incredibly apprised if the medical studies they used were about facial bones and not the limbs, and as previously stated, may not be relevant to the fractures created by bonesmashing.
Absolutely agree about Zac 😢
WTH is wrong with these ppl,encouraging a child to starve himself is disgusting. Social media has completely messed up this generation, it's so sad to witness as an 80s child who didn't have all this pressure to look a certain way.😢😢
Now we see the real things
Canthal tilt is just the male version of the Foxy Eye trend.
These kids need to find a hobby and develop themselves to provide real value to the world their careers and society. Wayyyyyyyy too much time on their hands and too much time spent looking in the mirror and their phones.
As a survivor of Ana ED - starvemaxxing is just having Ana and giving a more masculine sounding name. It breaks my heart to see young men going through the same pressures and tortures I and many other women did in the 2000s.
Great work!
Part of what is making some of this is that all of our media is 2d. At some point when 3d becomes standard some of these trends will die or change. As a simple example, I saw a celebrity being discussed who was a beautiful woman. However, she was girl next door beautiful, which meant her features were flattened on video. She got plastic surgery tweaks to make her features more defined. And then she was better received.
A bit late to the party but being a guy with insecurities just means that you never feel enough, I think a lot of women can relate to this but I still feel like it it just hits harder for younger men. As with the rise of social media came about a huge increase in these "influencers" who kind of try to monetize our insecurities, every day I see new statistics that just make me feel hopeless abt how guys under a certain height just have it harder or about how women only go for guys with certain attributes. This in combination with other problems (economic and politic) push guys to try and "fix" at least a single part of their life which results in looksmaxxing
Ok i must say that you went 100 to 0 with these things, most guys that want to better themselves would never “whitemax”. At best most guys that care about looksmaxxing would get a skincare, gym, get a haircut, lower body fat to 15-10%, change their style and get a stubble. Those forums are full of extremists but most content on TH-cam for example is all about softmaxxing and not hardmaxxing.
Hardmaxxing, just watch clinicsr surgery videos 😂
There is a saying, it rings true in my experience. "It's not the size of the ship, it is the motion of the ocean." -- you can be 12 in and still not get her to achieve the "goal" and achieving the goal is really all we care about.
You saying this for marriage or one night stand because I seen many women say size matter for just F many women want handsome guy for F
@sudalaimuthu3312 Both. Having a big D doesn't equal a big O. Whats the point in hooking up if we don't enjoy it too. Skill always tops size.
This is just the reality of people trying to escape the black pill(reality)
Mindblown😩
😱😱😱😵💫 I want to live my life under a rock again😬 (your videos are so intresting and😱❤️😂😵💫❣️)
I’ve been aware of the Incel community for 10 years. In fact, I used to kind of follow a guy that wasn’t in cell and talked about all the stuff but he wasn’t in so anymore he had started like working out and taking care of himself and not staying online as much, so he still was sort of in the community so he was trying to be a positive touch stone for other people that were like him when he was younger his name was based Shaman online
To this day, at 34 years old and married, I’ve never understood these insane height requirements girls/women have. The super short girl who said a guy “has to be” 6’6”?!?! Does she not understand the possible physical incompatibilities she could have with a man that tall?? 🥴
As a 5’2” woman, I dated a 6’2” guy once and after that I preferred guys 5’10” and under. Not that it was a deal-breaker, and the relationship with the taller guy didn’t end because of his height (obv). But a lot of physical… activities are much easier to enjoy when there isn’t a whole foot of height difference between us. And it’s for sure a bonus that my man isn’t breaking his back bending over to kiss me, and I also don’t have to be in heels or on tip-toe to reach him all the time 😅 Just my 2 cents 🤷🏻♀️
Finally someone who understands this
Is 5'6 good?
Getting LOTS of dates is not how you find the one. I had three boyfriends in my life and the third is my lifetime partner.
I have been teased, even, physically, challenged about my masculinity due to my high voice, which have led to people assuming I must be gay or effeminate. I HATE to hear my voice. I don't listen to voice recording. voice messages I leave for people, I NEVER took voice notes at Uni., even today post 40s I still dislike my high voice but NEVER considered surgery. Vocal lessons, yes, singling lessons, sure, acting and how to throw ones' voice, definitely, SURGERY!!!! HELL NAH!!
0:20 even more insane for men? I don't think so. Everything I've seen in the video so far, you could find the equivalent or worse for women. I think women still have more pressure beauty wise, and men have more pressure money wise.
"...men have more pressure money wise."
Women predominantly select their partners on the basis of their partners' physical attractiveness, to the same extent as men. Money is almost irrelevant for attracting women you want.
@@No_co_OK Most women are willing to bargain and compromise. Clearly we have eyes, ideal would be that he has both looks and money, but if the guy is broke, unless the girl has the lowest self esteem, she's definitely ditching him. That's why women are called "gold diggers" all the time including in pop music
@@rainforest.4577 What you're saying makes no sense. They don't need to compromise for someone that is not good looking because they can just date someone who is.
And income is just nowhere near as important a factor for attracting a partner as looks. What you're saying is just not substantiated by empirical research.
@@No_co_OK What you're saying makes no sense because I see it around me, women married to unattractive men. And I'm a woman myself. Women have always been about ressources first. Why do you think men try to impress them with money? There's always going to be "studied" aligning with whatever we want. I'm looking at real life. Young girls will drool over hot boys, but women who seek marriage will favor financial security first. Your manospheric looxmax beliefs are laughable at best. Most happily married men aren't even attractive. Most hot men get rejected bc women don't trust them, even with money it's a challenge for them, they complain about it constantly.
@@rainforest.4577 "What you're saying makes no sense because I see it around me, women married to unattractive men."
Anecdotal evidence.
"...but women who seek marriage will favor financial security first. "
Not what the research says. Sorry, you're just making things up.
Looksmaxxing is not only for men, it's for all people, men and women, you can call it glow up or self imrpove or anything you like, in the end it's the way to be the best version of yourself, lookmaxx was considered somthing only for men because everyone who talks about it are men, the reason is due to the difficulty of attracting a hot girls, while women have it easier, because men will fvck anything, so please women, have a certain awareness when talking about a topic