I'm 25 and all my friction growth is coming from me choosing to leave a job. And working towards something I was scared of. Coding. It's a ride. I've left addictive behaviours which come back and haunt me. My backstory doesn't matter coz it's a bigger pattern. I am aiming to achieve my dreams however much late and traumatized i am. If you read this, you would regret not having a good father around. You would regret not having the perfect parents. But what could kill you is the naysayer in your own mind. Get after it. Everything falls into place. This message is for men who need it.
Some of us single parents watch these videos to learn how to guide of kids as best we can. My personal example is single mom to a male child. I must try to educate myself about a man’s perspective. It is impossible to raise a healthy young man with only a woman’s perspective and vice versa. Thank you for the continued insight. ❤
@hollyandstelladoodle8748 i applaud you for making the conscious choice to learn how to raise your son better. It would help if you can get him around healthy men more often. I'd also recommend the book - No more my nice guy. Best of luck with raising your son
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth Hey, thanks! I managed to get him around some incredible men who guided him through early years and difficult times. There was definitely a lull in his 12-17. Shutdown, moving, life, etc… Men teach their children a strength women can’t. 🔄 I wish society would recognize that. My son is a highly motivated young man now, who at 19, forced his own path and is leaving for a month long work trip to Germany without fear! I’m beyond proud of him! The mom in me is packing a “lunchbox of wisdom” before he heads out in life. 😂 Edit to add: I own that book and love it!
Peter Pan Syndrome affects both men and women. A “Wendy” is a partner or parent who tolerates their child like behavior and doesn’t do anything to help them improve.
I hate the fact I have to reparent myself now in my 40s because my dad was such a passive sap. I said to my therapist why have kids if you aren’t prepared to do the work to prepare them properly.
Prior generations have just been unconscious and didn't really know themselves and their flaws. Thankfully we are becoming more conscious now. Hopefully this will show in future as people slowly learn how to raise kids the right way. Best of luck to you, it's never too late to change and heal 🙏🏽
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth thanks for the support brother I know I would never have kids without supporting them emotionally and mentally and I need to do the work myself first before I even consider it.
Your parents or one of your parents could've been a narcissist. I am going through this right now. He does everything possible to control me and has done everything possible to make sure that I fail or that I don't get anywhere in life. He has sabotaged me over the years and put me down constantly. He is an extremely selfish piece of cr*ap. I am late 30s but still a manchild because of his garbage "parenting".
1 thing I’m gonna add to this, some may not agree and a lot of these videos say stay away from them but if you don’t have a problem with alcohol a bar is a great place to be social and meet people, not everyone who goes to bars drink, not everyone gets sloppy drunk and in some cases 1 beer can help with social anxiety. Some bars can be great social places. Some people go to bars just to be the driver for they’re friends and hangout
I’m in my 40s, never married, and no kids, it could definitely be said that I have “Peter Pan Syndrome”. But I wonder how much research has been done regarding this syndrome being a symptom of some sort of childhood trauma. I grew up with an alcoholic and very abusive father (think Joe Jackson times 10!!), and I’m pretty sure this has had some effect on how I think, react, and navigate through life. Speaking of Joe Jackson, is it a coincidence that MJ was very Peter Pan-like???
@@DiamondMind630 Wow, I just read the overview and I’m blown away!! You’re right, there was emotional neglect! I tend to focus on the things that happened to me, and never even thought about the fact that no one was there to console me, sheeeesh!! Emotional neglect is what causes the “hole in your heart”, and I spent many years trying to fill it in unhealthy ways, but I’m almost 3 years sober now! Thanks for the recommendation!
Your parents or one of your parents could've been a narcissist. I am going through this right now. He does everything possible to control me and has done everything possible to make sure that I fail or that I don't get anywhere in life. He has sabotaged me over the years and put me down constantly. He is an extremely selfish piece of cr*ap. I am late 30s but still a manchild because of his garbage "parenting".
Guys at the end of the day if you work, and don't bother anyone enjoy your inner child. True individuality is being an adult while still being a child. I am a man child, video games and all that but I find myself a lot of time helping my more serious siblings. Be yourself, work hard, find your people and enjoy your inner child.
This is nothing to do with your inner child. Many men are literally irresponsible, emotionally and mentally under developed, and a slave to pleasure seeking. I agree you shouldn't lose touch with your inner child but that doesn't mean you stay stuck in a childlike mentality
Thanks for the Inspiration to look at oneself with understanding and acceptance, instead of judgement. Its ok to be a man full of questions, lacks and inner ambivalence. And it needs people like you to help those who never had the father figures and or healthy loving male examples.
Shocking that some men in their 30s and 40s are like this. Unattractive isn’t the right word. Repellent is probably more appropriate. Grown women don’t want to couple up with children.
Worst is when they fake being an adult and lie to get into a marriage then let their new wife be the parent. That happened to me. They opt out of life. The opt out of being adult. I am now looking for a way out of this sham
For 26 years I watched anime, music and ate restaurant food. Right now for first time working in desktop printing shop. I do not want to marry it's risky. Working for wife and children is too much effort and bothersome . I get exploited in adult world easily, I'm innocent type
Something i have noticed really early on is that the world itself is not mature, the idea of professionalism has crumbled but has evolved into something better, accountability. i've seen kids younger than me that exihibit that but are chained to immaturity because people still think video games are for children meanwhile, if people understand the value of games as a whole, people will understand why gaming is actually mature and keeps becoming increasingly mature in the audience. The world has lost its actual maturity but has gained new professions.
Very good video - yes challenges are what make us stronger. The real freedom is when you stop blaming others. You have to stop thinking that you have been let down by your parents, by society, by ANY external force. It's up to YOU, and YOU alone. Give up the blame game, it is a dead-end, you cannot grow when you have grievance in your heart. You become a man by looking up and forward, not back and down. Choose your own role models, real or fictional, doesn't matter. The films of the 80's offered lots of great role models, not so much these days! But they exist, on film, literature or in real life. Pick some, aspire to adopt their masculine attributes, their swagger. If you've been let down by the role models in your life, pick your own. Your challenges should also be social. Physical fitness is important, but your psychological disposition, and your ability to articulate yourself is THE real skill. Develop your speech, if your voice is a stumbling monotone, or dull and lifeless, then work on it. Read out loud from a book till it improves. Coach your voice, your vocal cords are controlled by muscles - work on them. Your voice and words are the most powerful thing you own, and yet it is often completely neglected. Finally, learn about human psychology, learn the basics, learn the lingo, the definitions - it will arm you with something to say, and a deeper understanding of your own strengths, weaknesses, and desires. If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies, Or being hated, don’t give way to hating, And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise: If you can dream-and not make dreams your master; If you can think-and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools: If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’ If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with Kings-nor lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run, Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, And-which is more-you’ll be a Man, my son!
I am close in my thirties now. The worst thing is I have deficit attention or ADHD, which make me forgetful and very distracted and I didn't know that until my 18 years. The worst part is that my mother didn't teach me how to make my own decisions and she's a single mom until I was 26 and she saying that she's trying to teach me but if I remember right all my childhood she never did and comparing for my friends from my neighborhood their parents teaching them how to realistic and decisive decision while my mom never did teach me. She always get angry when I try to make my own decisions she always wanted to make decisions for me including now. The worst part is I never even have a father figure on my side in my life.
So what else could this come from besides a broken family? My parents were together till i was an adult. My dad was always in my life. They both took very good care of me. I've always felt like this, even as a young adult. I avoided any responsibility that stressed me. This includes any promotion at work/army. I cant hold a relationship, have a failed marriage, etc.
Somewhere along the line, you decided to abandon yourself and develop a persona such as a 'nice guy'. Maybe you felt that would get you approval or validation
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth I've always been a shy/timid kid who was friendly. I was bullied alot so you are correct about me wanting validation/approval from others. I can see that stopping me from being able to connect with people but everything else?
There is actually a ritual for us to get better. You know that's called rock bottom. Everyone has a version of this. It could be financially... You have problems making money, keeping money, and saving money. You struggle to pay off bad debt. You owe 1-3 debt collectors. You have been evicted. You are homeless. Everything seems to fall apart. That's just an example. The best way to overcome this problem is to face it head-on.
Not having relationships dont make a man a child it could be because he is detached from the outside world and friends and family tend to find it strange. I've never got along with my parents but the relationship is neutral I've always had good friends but they always found me a bit strange and detached from everyone not just physically but emotionally. I've always had a job since 15 to help pay the rent I was always giving but rarely given much. Idk man it's hard to build meaningful relationships with shady people. What do you think?
@CrazycarvidsSecondaryaccount You have the ability to sense when someone is being fake. When you feel like you are being used. You can feel other people's energy around you. You can tell if someone cares about you or not. Based on how someone treats you. You have to surround yourself with people who value you. People who pour into you. People who are loyal to you. You also have to become the version that attracts these types of people by embodying the qualities and giving it to other people. You also have to know when someone is bad for you. Just knowing when to let go of the person. When to walk away. When to be silent. Self control is the most important thing you will ever learn in your life. Our job in this world is to become the best version we can ever be for ourselves. What does that mean? It means that we need to prioritize ourselves more. Start being the problem solver in your life. Stop depending on others to solve your own problems. You have to start taking ownership of your life. You understand that anything good or bad is your fault. Taking full responsibility for your life is the greatest thing that will ever happen to you. When you get to this point in life, this is where you begin to take your power back.
Hi, thank you for the video on this issue, I've seen a few of them and I'm very interested in this topic. I want to ask, is it possible that Peter Pan syndrome is actually synonymous with the "disconnected man" that Prof. Zimbardo mentions? Thank you
I am 37 my parents have depended on me since I was 18 to pay the mortgage 😢 I’ve never had a life at close to 40 I realized life is all but gone for me I’ve never owned my home or a dog 😢 lmao Mi wish my life to be over
Bro, I'm 45 years old, owned a house and a dog when I was 30 and let me tell you. I sold my house last year to live in an apartment in another city. I only bought that house bc my long time gf wanted it. My mother also wanted me to buy a truck and I did. Me and my girlfriend broke up 5 years ago. Basically I've been living my whole life to appease others and keeping up with the Joneses. I've never felt so out of touch with myself. My relationship ended and I finally let go of everything that did not matter to me. I was happy the way I was before. Never let people or societal norms dictate what your happiness is. It's your life and live it the way you want to! You are never too old to become happy and peaceful. Enjoy it the way YOU want to live.
This is very educational but generally i think this is toxic positivity we are living in a world that when we grow old people biasly tell us to forget our childhood that through something special to us and as a 27 year old gay-man i discover that this life has never been what i have imagine it is not the world i wish to live adult life is very disappointing i lose part of myself that it cannot be restored cause it is long dead i am not going to deny that one no toxic-positivity and we cannot tell to people just to forget their pains like it never happen we have different truama each take different approach to heal them that is not how i works the more we ignore our feelings at any forms the worst it gets lets be honest is it really that easy to forget it like it is not heavy.
I'm not sure I understand your point. Try using full stops please! I dont see how it is toxic positivity? The video is meant to help guys realize that many are emotionally underdeveloped. Which is not their fault, likely due to trauma etc. But it can be healed and you can start the journey to become emotionally mature. You never 'lose' parts of yourself. They are always there. They just need nurturing and healing back to life 🙏🏽
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth More like resentment that shitty vids like this exist, the vid makers are irrationally above reproach, and not counter women-child vids. Next . . .
@robertklund3201 I've heard that too. I'm not entirely sure its a good thing thou. Alot of people are emotionally underdeveloped and lack maturity. They may be 50yo but have the emotional maturity of a 25-yo. It's sad
Having kids or playing video games are secondary issues. It's more so about your degree of emotional development. Our modern day culture is very emotionally immature and it's probably only going to get worse. Trust me there's alot of people out there who have kids but are still very immature
People can act anyway they want, like I am on the spectrum so my mind works differently to other people so I most likely act younger than my age, I defo not feel my biological age…. It has nothing to do with you how other people live their lives, since it is their lives not yours.
Unfortunately alot of men are not happy being themselves. So that means there's a problem. If you're happy acting like a child may you continue to do so. Many others would rather overcome their limitations and live a different kind of life.
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth but adult life and adult responsibilities can be boring and stressful, that is way I rather still be a teenager than a grown man.
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth I get what you are saying, since when I was younger I used to not be happy about being myself due to the fact that I am autistic and I found it hard to mask my condition at times, especially not talking about my special interests… I now wish I was just happy being my autistic self when I was a teenager and in my early 20s, but unfortunately it was just the mindset that I had at the time.
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth It's low hanging fruit, of course. I just think in todays age the "loser" just has more things to do cope with those problems. Despite what people think, violence for example has gone down a lot in society. Of course that goes against narratives so it's not really talked about much.
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth Na… I'm definitely not a man child. I worked all my life, have 2 kids, and I'm married, plus we just bought a house. Well, to be fair, my wife tells me all the time that I'm like a child 🤔
I don't know any person to whom you're referring. Saying I'm good, sounds a lot more socially acceptable to say than the alternative I'm nothing. I've accepted I'll have nothing. Ah, that's right, I'm "not" supposed to do this or I am to do that, or something else which having had a normal life would have benefitted. If even saying that could be acceptable. It's blatantly obvious I'm fucked, thanks for bringing it up. Oh that's right, you didn't, I did
Check out part 2 - How to heal the Man-Child - th-cam.com/video/gUiF52g2HM0/w-d-xo.html&ab_channel=AuthenticSelfGrowth
I'm 25 and all my friction growth is coming from me choosing to leave a job. And working towards something I was scared of. Coding. It's a ride. I've left addictive behaviours which come back and haunt me. My backstory doesn't matter coz it's a bigger pattern. I am aiming to achieve my dreams however much late and traumatized i am. If you read this, you would regret not having a good father around. You would regret not having the perfect parents. But what could kill you is the naysayer in your own mind. Get after it. Everything falls into place. This message is for men who need it.
I’m 25 too and I need it
How has your journey been so far? Have you fallen back into your old ways?
@@pranjalruhela1103 What do you mean?
@@pranjalruhela1103 What's your steam champ? I'll add you up on there so we can talk in private.
Some of us single parents watch these videos to learn how to guide of kids as best we can.
My personal example is single mom to a male child. I must try to educate myself about a man’s perspective. It is impossible to raise a healthy young man with only a woman’s perspective and vice versa.
Thank you for the continued insight. ❤
@hollyandstelladoodle8748 i applaud you for making the conscious choice to learn how to raise your son better. It would help if you can get him around healthy men more often. I'd also recommend the book - No more my nice guy. Best of luck with raising your son
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth Hey, thanks! I managed to get him around some incredible men who guided him through early years and difficult times.
There was definitely a lull in his 12-17. Shutdown, moving, life, etc…
Men teach their children a strength women can’t. 🔄 I wish society would recognize that.
My son is a highly motivated young man now, who at 19, forced his own path and is leaving for a month long work trip to Germany without fear! I’m beyond proud of him!
The mom in me is packing a “lunchbox of wisdom” before he heads out in life. 😂
Edit to add: I own that book and love it!
@@hollyandstelladoodle8748 You are a great and strong woman. Greetings from Montenegro.
Peter Pan Syndrome affects both men and women. A “Wendy” is a partner or parent who tolerates their child like behavior and doesn’t do anything to help them improve.
"Wendy . . . give me the bat."
I hate the fact I have to reparent myself now in my 40s because my dad was such a passive sap. I said to my therapist why have kids if you aren’t prepared to do the work to prepare them properly.
Prior generations have just been unconscious and didn't really know themselves and their flaws. Thankfully we are becoming more conscious now. Hopefully this will show in future as people slowly learn how to raise kids the right way. Best of luck to you, it's never too late to change and heal 🙏🏽
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth thanks for the support brother I know I would never have kids without supporting them emotionally and mentally and I need to do the work myself first before I even consider it.
I'm going through this right now, late 30s. And my dad STILL has the audacity to try and control my life! I am fed up with it!!
Your parents or one of your parents could've been a narcissist. I am going through this right now. He does everything possible to control me and has done everything possible to make sure that I fail or that I don't get anywhere in life. He has sabotaged me over the years and put me down constantly. He is an extremely selfish piece of cr*ap. I am late 30s but still a manchild because of his garbage "parenting".
@@1legend517 trying to live through you?
1 thing I’m gonna add to this, some may not agree and a lot of these videos say stay away from them but if you don’t have a problem with alcohol a bar is a great place to be social and meet people, not everyone who goes to bars drink, not everyone gets sloppy drunk and in some cases 1 beer can help with social anxiety. Some bars can be great social places. Some people go to bars just to be the driver for they’re friends and hangout
I’m in my 40s, never married, and no kids, it could definitely be said that I have “Peter Pan Syndrome”. But I wonder how much research has been done regarding this syndrome being a symptom of some sort of childhood trauma. I grew up with an alcoholic and very abusive father (think Joe Jackson times 10!!), and I’m pretty sure this has had some effect on how I think, react, and navigate through life. Speaking of Joe Jackson, is it a coincidence that MJ was very Peter Pan-like???
Emotional neglect brother check out the book running on empty I just did and I hit all symptoms.
@@DiamondMind630 Wow, I just read the overview and I’m blown away!! You’re right, there was emotional neglect! I tend to focus on the things that happened to me, and never even thought about the fact that no one was there to console me, sheeeesh!! Emotional neglect is what causes the “hole in your heart”, and I spent many years trying to fill it in unhealthy ways, but I’m almost 3 years sober now! Thanks for the recommendation!
@@ALTheFreeMan no problem glad to help in the book it breaks it down into several types of parents one is the addicted to substances parent
Your parents or one of your parents could've been a narcissist. I am going through this right now. He does everything possible to control me and has done everything possible to make sure that I fail or that I don't get anywhere in life. He has sabotaged me over the years and put me down constantly. He is an extremely selfish piece of cr*ap. I am late 30s but still a manchild because of his garbage "parenting".
Guys at the end of the day if you work, and don't bother anyone enjoy your inner child. True individuality is being an adult while still being a child. I am a man child, video games and all that but I find myself a lot of time helping my more serious siblings. Be yourself, work hard, find your people and enjoy your inner child.
This is nothing to do with your inner child. Many men are literally irresponsible, emotionally and mentally under developed, and a slave to pleasure seeking. I agree you shouldn't lose touch with your inner child but that doesn't mean you stay stuck in a childlike mentality
Thanks for the Inspiration to look at oneself with understanding and acceptance, instead of judgement.
Its ok to be a man full of questions, lacks and inner ambivalence.
And it needs people like you to help those who never had the father figures and or healthy loving male examples.
God bless 🙏🏽
Shocking that some men in their 30s and 40s are like this. Unattractive isn’t the right word. Repellent is probably more appropriate. Grown women don’t want to couple up with children.
It's true and it's sad. Modern society doesn't do much to help males grow and develop. Usually the women and children suffer as a consequence
Worst is when they fake being an adult and lie to get into a marriage then let their new wife be the parent. That happened to me. They opt out of life. The opt out of being adult. I am now looking for a way out of this sham
Big thank you
You're welcome
You can't have healthy relationships when you're the only mature adult in a nation of adult teens.
Great video 🎉
For 26 years I watched anime, music and ate restaurant food. Right now for first time working in desktop printing shop.
I do not want to marry it's risky. Working for wife and children is too much effort and bothersome . I get exploited in adult world easily, I'm innocent type
It's never to late to change 🙏🏽
@@AuthenticSelfGrowthnever say never
You are not innocent, you are immature
I appreciate you admitting your immaturity. Todays men constantly gaslight our experiences
Something i have noticed really early on is that the world itself is not mature, the idea of professionalism has crumbled but has evolved into something better, accountability. i've seen kids younger than me that exihibit that but are chained to immaturity because people still think video games are for children meanwhile, if people understand the value of games as a whole, people will understand why gaming is actually mature and keeps becoming increasingly mature in the audience.
The world has lost its actual maturity but has gained new professions.
Thanks for the video
I bought my own home, pay my own bills.. never married ... yet. Still like to game on weekends
Download my free ebook - mailchi.mp/2e113b45691e/download-free-ebook
Follow me on IG - instagram.com/authentic.self.growth
Excellent video
Very good video - yes challenges are what make us stronger. The real freedom is when you stop blaming others. You have to stop thinking that you have been let down by your parents, by society, by ANY external force. It's up to YOU, and YOU alone. Give up the blame game, it is a dead-end, you cannot grow when you have grievance in your heart. You become a man by looking up and forward, not back and down.
Choose your own role models, real or fictional, doesn't matter. The films of the 80's offered lots of great role models, not so much these days! But they exist, on film, literature or in real life. Pick some, aspire to adopt their masculine attributes, their swagger. If you've been let down by the role models in your life, pick your own.
Your challenges should also be social. Physical fitness is important, but your psychological disposition, and your ability to articulate yourself is THE real skill. Develop your speech, if your voice is a stumbling monotone, or dull and lifeless, then work on it. Read out loud from a book till it improves. Coach your voice, your vocal cords are controlled by muscles - work on them. Your voice and words are the most powerful thing you own, and yet it is often completely neglected.
Finally, learn about human psychology, learn the basics, learn the lingo, the definitions - it will arm you with something to say, and a deeper understanding of your own strengths, weaknesses, and desires.
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream-and not make dreams your master;
If you can think-and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings-nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And-which is more-you’ll be a Man, my son!
Appreciate the contribution 🙏🏽
I am close in my thirties now. The worst thing is I have deficit attention or ADHD, which make me forgetful and very distracted and I didn't know that until my 18 years. The worst part is that my mother didn't teach me how to make my own decisions and she's a single mom until I was 26 and she saying that she's trying to teach me but if I remember right all my childhood she never did and comparing for my friends from my neighborhood their parents teaching them how to realistic and decisive decision while my mom never did teach me. She always get angry when I try to make my own decisions she always wanted to make decisions for me including now. The worst part is I never even have a father figure on my side in my life.
Imo the cause of all these issues is you had no father figure. My next video is on this very topic. It should be uploaded this weekend. God bless 🙏🏽
Whether it's college or martial arts or sports.
So what else could this come from besides a broken family? My parents were together till i was an adult. My dad was always in my life. They both took very good care of me. I've always felt like this, even as a young adult. I avoided any responsibility that stressed me. This includes any promotion at work/army. I cant hold a relationship, have a failed marriage, etc.
Somewhere along the line, you decided to abandon yourself and develop a persona such as a 'nice guy'. Maybe you felt that would get you approval or validation
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth I've always been a shy/timid kid who was friendly. I was bullied alot so you are correct about me wanting validation/approval from others. I can see that stopping me from being able to connect with people but everything else?
Usually overparenting and enabling immaturity
There is actually a ritual for us to get better. You know that's called rock bottom. Everyone has a version of this.
It could be financially...
You have problems making money, keeping money, and saving money. You struggle to pay off bad debt. You owe 1-3 debt collectors. You have been evicted. You are homeless. Everything seems to fall apart.
That's just an example.
The best way to overcome this problem is to face it head-on.
Not having relationships dont make a man a child it could be because he is detached from the outside world and friends and family tend to find it strange. I've never got along with my parents but the relationship is neutral I've always had good friends but they always found me a bit strange and detached from everyone not just physically but emotionally. I've always had a job since 15 to help pay the rent I was always giving but rarely given much. Idk man it's hard to build meaningful relationships with shady people. What do you think?
@@CrazycarvidsSecondaryaccount I agree with your message 100%.
@CrazycarvidsSecondaryaccount You have the ability to sense when someone is being fake. When you feel like you are being used. You can feel other people's energy around you. You can tell if someone cares about you or not. Based on how someone treats you.
You have to surround yourself with people who value you. People who pour into you. People who are loyal to you.
You also have to become the version that attracts these types of people by embodying the qualities and giving it to other people.
You also have to know when someone is bad for you. Just knowing when to let go of the person. When to walk away. When to be silent.
Self control is the most important thing you will ever learn in your life.
Our job in this world is to become the best version we can ever be for ourselves. What does that mean? It means that we need to prioritize ourselves more. Start being the problem solver in your life. Stop depending on others to solve your own problems. You have to start taking ownership of your life. You understand that anything good or bad is your fault. Taking full responsibility for your life is the greatest thing that will ever happen to you.
When you get to this point in life, this is where you begin to take your power back.
Awesome video
You are so kind to share this msg so well. Everything you said is true.
🙏🏽🙏🏽
My father is a narcissist. I don't want to be a manchild anymore and I am sick to death of him controlling my life!!!
@@1legend517 work on moving out brother although not easy it is the only way you can change fully.
I had ten mentors and my father.
Hi, thank you for the video on this issue, I've seen a few of them and I'm very interested in this topic. I want to ask, is it possible that Peter Pan syndrome is actually synonymous with the "disconnected man" that Prof. Zimbardo mentions? Thank you
I haven't heard about this 'disconnected man' theory. But if it sounds similar I'm sure it could well be
You are very brave to speak out about this but you're going to ruffle a lot of feathers.
This is common sense. Shame on them who will be offended.
I am 37 my parents have depended on me since I was 18 to pay the mortgage 😢
I’ve never had a life at close to 40 I realized life is all but gone for me
I’ve never owned my home or a dog 😢 lmao
Mi wish my life to be over
You still have time my friend. Its never over until you say it is 🙏🏽
Bro, I'm 45 years old, owned a house and a dog when I was 30 and let me tell you. I sold my house last year to live in an apartment in another city. I only bought that house bc my long time gf wanted it. My mother also wanted me to buy a truck and I did. Me and my girlfriend broke up 5 years ago. Basically I've been living my whole life to appease others and keeping up with the Joneses. I've never felt so out of touch with myself. My relationship ended and I finally let go of everything that did not matter to me. I was happy the way I was before. Never let people or societal norms dictate what your happiness is. It's your life and live it the way you want to! You are never too old to become happy and peaceful. Enjoy it the way YOU want to live.
And my late grandfather's.
This is very educational but generally i think this is toxic positivity we are living in a world that when we grow old people biasly tell us to forget our childhood that through something special to us and as a 27 year old gay-man i discover that this life has never been what i have imagine it is not the world i wish to live adult life is very disappointing i lose part of myself that it cannot be restored cause it is long dead i am not going to deny that one no toxic-positivity and we cannot tell to people just to forget their pains like it never happen we have different truama each take different approach to heal them that is not how i works the more we ignore our feelings at any forms the worst it gets lets be honest is it really that easy to forget it like it is not heavy.
I'm not sure I understand your point. Try using full stops please! I dont see how it is toxic positivity? The video is meant to help guys realize that many are emotionally underdeveloped. Which is not their fault, likely due to trauma etc. But it can be healed and you can start the journey to become emotionally mature. You never 'lose' parts of yourself. They are always there. They just need nurturing and healing back to life 🙏🏽
Ive had a man child problem and an anger problem trust me the anger problem is worse
The anger problem is probably related to the man child problem
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth More like resentment that shitty vids like this exist, the vid makers are irrationally above reproach, and not counter women-child vids. Next . . .
They say you're as young as you feel.
@robertklund3201 I've heard that too. I'm not entirely sure its a good thing thou. Alot of people are emotionally underdeveloped and lack maturity. They may be 50yo but have the emotional maturity of a 25-yo. It's sad
Not wanting to have kids doesn't mean you haven't grown up. And playing video games in moderation is OK.
Having kids or playing video games are secondary issues. It's more so about your degree of emotional development. Our modern day culture is very emotionally immature and it's probably only going to get worse. Trust me there's alot of people out there who have kids but are still very immature
This why divorce be so common
Your calendly seems broken
Thanks for letting me know
I would study engineering or computer science in college or martial arts or sports or a trade. Most of the coaches are males.
'Infactuation' 😂
Many people have social anxiety without being "man-children"
I didn't day everyone with anxiety is a man child. But anxiety is a symptom of an underdeveloped immature mind
I find more women like this than men.
@roxannekane6142 Maybe in some cultures perhaps? Or women who are wounded themselves. Generally these types of men struggle with women
People can act anyway they want, like I am on the spectrum so my mind works differently to other people so I most likely act younger than my age, I defo not feel my biological age…. It has nothing to do with you how other people live their lives, since it is their lives not yours.
Unfortunately alot of men are not happy being themselves. So that means there's a problem. If you're happy acting like a child may you continue to do so. Many others would rather overcome their limitations and live a different kind of life.
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth but adult life and adult responsibilities can be boring and stressful, that is way I rather still be a teenager than a grown man.
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth I get what you are saying, since when I was younger I used to not be happy about being myself due to the fact that I am autistic and I found it hard to mask my condition at times, especially not talking about my special interests… I now wish I was just happy being my autistic self when I was a teenager and in my early 20s, but unfortunately it was just the mindset that I had at the time.
No one said life was supposed to be easy.
We are here to grow, develop and mature.
What was your relationship with your father like?
Humans are social creatures. The only things that can live alone are either a beast or a god.
6:09 lol buddy we gotta talk
I played all sports
I think people just have more copes when adulthood doesn't work out.
...or there might be a reason adulthood didn't work out
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth It's low hanging fruit, of course. I just think in todays age the "loser" just has more things to do cope with those problems. Despite what people think, violence for example has gone down a lot in society. Of course that goes against narratives so it's not really talked about much.
i m not sure why this man children stuff is all over my youtube feed. is this some new trend or whats happening? 😆
@Freakazoid23 maybe youtube is trying to tell u something
@@AuthenticSelfGrowth Na… I'm definitely not a man child. I worked all my life, have 2 kids, and I'm married, plus we just bought a house. Well, to be fair, my wife tells me all the time that I'm like a child 🤔
@Freakazoid23 that's good. It's not so much about what you've got or done but more so about your level of emotional maturity
Seed Retention
Mommy still raising you in your adulthood
Smh
I like getting high is my problem I hate reality I’d rather be in another realm can’t take the matrix
'The matrix' is the grown up reality. Hopefully you'll develop to the point wher you can face and conquer it
Wendy's
Sounds like 95% of modern women
I'm independent
I pay my own bills
Welcome to adulthood
LmfaoOoo 😂😂😂😂😂
I don't know any person to whom you're referring. Saying I'm good, sounds a lot more socially acceptable to say than the alternative I'm nothing. I've accepted I'll have nothing. Ah, that's right, I'm "not" supposed to do this or I am to do that, or something else which having had a normal life would have benefitted. If even saying that could be acceptable.
It's blatantly obvious I'm fucked, thanks for bringing it up. Oh that's right, you didn't, I did