When I first heard about this type of decluttering, it felt odd but I read the book & realized the true meaning. I don't want our adult kids to have to go through so much stuff then needed. I had to do this with 2 family members & it took so long & the emotional battle was difficult. I am glad I read the book & watched many videos on the subject. We are decluttering as much as we can not to burden family members with our stuff when our day arrives to meet our Lord. It feels good to have peace now for us & peace for them later. Thanks for your videos.
When my Mom passed my siblings and myself had the task of clearing out my parents home to sell .We had to make many decisions in what to do with her belongings. It was very hard to do, we all took a few things that reminded of us of our parents. Fast forward to few months after, and I decided I would never put our daughter in that position , especially she is very sentimental.I started in my junk drawer and Swedish death cleaned my whole house. I was never a clutter bug, but to be honest it took me at least 6 months donated,selling , and throwing away. This was 5 years ago now, I love living intentionally, I also only shop now when I need something. I don’t like shopping anymore, because I’m really not interested in bringing anything into my spacious , calm home. My daughter jokes with me, she said one day it will take her a weekend to clear my house…. I have a long time till that day comes God willing, but I know my daughter and son in law will not have the daunting task of what my siblings and I had… It’s a way to make your children life easy when the time comes. My husband and I also went to estate lawyer and all our finances are taken care of for her, that was the best money we could have spent
You have given your daughter a wonderful gift. We have done the same thing as you have, and now have such a feeling of peace knowing that we won't leave our kids with a huge project.
@@kathrynwebster6307 thank you, it really does being peace knowing that your children won’t have to make decisions, and even going to estate lawyer, my husband and I made it as easy as it can be for her… You as well are giving your children a wonderful gift ❤️
We can’t keep every season forever! I REALLY NEEDED that one! I just spent the last several years cleaning out my mother’s stuff. She was a classic depression kid, born in 1929 even! Started a looooong time ago cleaning out my stuff because I disliked that my ow mother’s houses was so cluttered. For years, I did well…..moving always helped because we moved ourselves. But now at 63, her stuff is dealt with for the most part; my three children have taken the things that they wanted; I’ve begun giving them some of my stuff. So it is catching me by surprise that, at this stage, I am struggling. I feel it in my body first, and recognize that some emotion is inside me……but identifying it and undoing it via my mental health tools has been perplexing. I was STUCK. That one line however is helping sooooo much! I don’t really know what season I am in, and it is scaring the HELL out of me! That is the lump I my throat and the tightening in my chest that I am experiencing! 2023 is my year to explore new things! My mom is gone. My children are all grown and happy in their chosen trajectories. My hubs is retired and satisfied with his life now. He is seven years older, and it took him a long while to redefine himself but has success in it. (I’m not messin’ with that!). But for me? I want something new! Not stuff. Looking at MY STUFF now reminds me that I am no longer in those seasons. So thank you!
I de-cluttered and downsized to a 900 sq. ft. apartment. I gave away 3/4 of my possessions to accommodate my new space. So glad I did it. I haven't missed a thing! It is so freeing to have less stuff and to live an intentionally simpler life. And... I'm no longer embarrassed if someone drops in unannounced. That's what hoarders live in fear of- being embarrassed to have anyone see how they live. My sister in law hasn't let anyone into her home in 10 years due to her hoarding. It's so sad.
We were planning a move last summer so we loaded up 6-7 loads of excess to the dump, made many, many trips to recycle and donating stores, and packed and moved half of our remaining stuff to the barn! Our home didn't sell,and we didn't move😵. We really love the look of our home which is so much more open, and much easier to care for. We're not sure whether to try to sell again or just stay put for awhile. BUT, we've decided to bring back to the home a few boxes at a time and really get ruthless about what we want to live with or take if we do move! It's amazing the amount of possessions we accumulated and we have been doing periodic purges along the way! I just don't want to cart around or care for a lot of these things any longer! We're both in our 70's and it's past time for us to "lighten the load"! Our daughter has enough going on in her life to not have to deal with our stuff! I bought and read the book on the art death cleaning but just didn't get as much downsizing done as I should have. That is now my number one priority. Subscribed and will be watching all your videos, past and future😎
We’re moving soon and after packing what we wanted to keep from each room, we sold and gave away the excess. It feels great to let go and move on with our best.
I also identify with all three! My mom grew up in the depression & our basement & home was full of things. She would take things out of the trash that I threw out & bring it back in the housel I also like to have things around and deal with how life is short. Egads. Your videos are so insightful and helpful. I am decluttering so much now that I am retired and do not want my daughters to have to deal with "all this STUFF". Thank you so much for all your time and effort to make these videos to help others. Bless you.
My grandma, a child of the depression, passed away at 90. She lived in the family farmhouse. Emptying the house felt like it had died, too. Five generations of "Don't get rid of that, you might need it someday!" was kind of impressive! We even found a trunk that must have come across from Ireland with the family, full of paperwork from the 1870s. So sad to disperse the stuff! So many buried antiques and interesting things! I hated watching it. 😟. I strive to make my own house less interesting, though, but I did put many of her things back into use.
All of the old stuff and treasures can be interesting and a window to another time. It sounds like your grandparents held onto some wonderful memories. Adults who lived through the depression had an understanding of why they kept things. For the children who lived through it, that was all they knew, so that's how they raised their children too. Often, the mindset of keeping things was handed down, but the reason was lost. It was necessary to keep things during the depression because things were hard to come by. Later it was considered frugal. No need to be wasteful just because you have a little money in your pocket. But for the next generation, it became a problem rather than a solve. Those of us who were the children of the depression era generation kids kept everything because that's what we were taught to do, not because we actually needed to in order to survive. We were able to obtain things more easily than our parents, but we kept everything because we didn't learn about getting rid of things and why that is necessary. Our parents probably never learned that themselves. At some point, we find ourselves living in decades of useless items. The treasures and memories are lost because there is so much. We are learning now to tell the difference between trash and treasure from the grandchildren and great grandchildren of the depression era generation. Instead of living in and leaving behind a burden of clutter, we hope to live in and leave behind interesting stuff like your grandparents did. My sister decorates her home in antiques. Her home is full of interest. It would be heartbreaking to see it go. My house just has boxes of junk that I didn't know I was allowed to get rid of. That's the difference. My sister made it work. I think your grandparents did it right if you were so touched by the things they left behind. How lovely that you got to experience that. 😄❤
This is the first of your videos I've seen - I am now a subscriber. I have been intrigued by Swedish death cleaning but have not bought the book. The history was interesting and inspiring. I started decluttering because I didn't want my son to deal with all of our things when we die. My mother's house was a disaster! It took a week to clean it out. My ultra-organized and tidy mother-in-law's house took less than a day. I decided then, that an easy clean out was what I wanted to leave to my son, not a houseful of stuff that would end up at the thrift store anyway. I formerly had all three instincts, but now I only struggle with the instinct of clutter. I still have a hard time letting go of the items I grew up seeing in my home and my grandparent's homes. I have to keep reminding myself that their legacy is who I became because of their influence, not what of theirs surrounds me. I used to have the instinct of hoarding, but when everything in every store started looking the same, I became disinterested in shopping. And then I stopped thrifting when I decided on a no spend year. As for fear of death - decluttering taught me to let go of the fantasy that I would repurpose all these "useable" items - I'll leave that to someone else with more time and less to do! Thank you again for this channel.
A recent presentation on decluttering suggested to share the story and significance behind the item. Then it has served the purpose and the actual item can be released.
I'm very relieved to not have any of these three issues! My Swedish death cleaning habits right now are focused on scanning and discarding things like old snapshots, negatives, and unneeded paperwork--because as we get older, physical movements become more difficult, and I don't want to be hauling around heavy boxes and stuffed-to-the-brim suitcases when I'm in my sixties. I am 51 now, and I want to maintain these good declutting habits to avoid the physical (and emotional!) strain of moving unnecessary "stuff" when my body is no longer capable of doing so.
This is a great video. Makes you stop and think about why people hold on to things. My daughter just turned 18 and holds on to everything. I'm going to share this video with her. Have a great day!
Ah, you just hit the nail on the head for me ... 'that's from a different season of life has passed ... we can't keep every season forever' ... Since finding you and your channel I've been able to let go of lots of clutter and clean so much better ... I am sooo grateful!
I relate to all 3 of these instincts. Both my mother and father grew up during the Depression, and kept everything "just in case" in order to not have to buy it again someday. I picked up this habit as well. At 49, and both parents have passed, I am still dealing with their belongings. I don't have children of my own, so its less about me leaving things behind for them, and more about putting monetary value on things. I spent this much for that item, sure would hate to have to buy it again down the road if I got rid of it...I despise the clutter in my very modest 1200 sq.ft. house, but I find it hard to let things go. I am definitely working on this, as I just want to have a peaceful, tidy, everything in its place, sanctuary to call home. Love your channel! Thank you for giving us hope in getting our clutter under control.
You are spot on about the depression. My parents grew up during that time and those mindsets were handed down to us. I've learned that my natural instinct is clear space, but it has battled with that taught mindset my whole life. When my mom died, I started letting all of that go. I am slowly decluttering and becoming my true self. In the process, I have learned that my hubby "likes stuff" so I try to find the balance. It slows my progress, but I want both of us to be comfortable in our home, so I'm okay with it. I've had decades of practice living with mess and compromise, so finding the compromise doesn't bother me as bad as it might bother others. Decluttering my own stuff keeps me busy and makes it better. I just work around hubby's stuff. 😄
@@MinimalistHome After commenting here, I saw your post about your dad. I'm so sorry. I've been through it too. Both of my parents are gone now. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
We moved into my husband's grandparents house in 2001 when they paseed. Remember the "FRIENDS" episode. When they went through Ross's grandmother's stuff. They opened the closet the the sweet-low packets came falling out? They how it was for us! Not to mention the pie tins. Captain D's to go packets, (forks, spoons, napkins, ect.). Lol! We live on their farm. We are still getting rid of STUFF! 22 years later. It has been hard but we are finally getting somewhere.
I love the concept of Swedish death cleaning, although I disliked the book quite a bit. Of those instincts (none of which actually qualify as “instincts“), what resonates most for me is wanting to keep things around that are useful or might be useful because I am very frugal. However, after helping to clear out both my grandmother’s and my mother-in-law‘s very cluttered homes when they died, I do not want to leave that sort of mess to my children. And I also find visual clutter distressing. I am really committed to working toward minimalism in my home.
Great video. My grandparents lived through the great depression and they each hoarded in different ways. My grandfather had to have a cetain amount of canned food items. The inventory couldn't get lower than say 12 cans. I don't know if that was his number, but he had a number. My grandmother hoarded everything else. When I helped her clean a spared bedroomn closet she had a wedding dress of one of her deceased daughter in laws. =/ She didn't even remember how she came to obtain it. And she had a hard time getting rid of stuff. She had a very large "think about it" pile. And her poor kids had to go through all of her stuff when they passed. That will not happen to my kids.
My parents lived in Amsterdam during the war as a young couple with babies and yes, my mother kept everything when we were moving her from her house to an apartment she had pears that she had canned in jars that she kept Trying to get us to take because they’re still OK to eat even though you can see the parents are falling apart. I finally had to tell my sisters to take it. You can throw it away when you’re home the jar still works
You have a knack for telling me things I already know deep down but haven't accepted. And in doing so, you're inspiring me and helping me change my life ❤🧡💛💚💙💜
My two sisters and I were traumatised when we had to clear my mum's home after she died. We spent so much time crying and often had to go home during the process to calm down. I am glad I will never have to go through that experience again. I will have to go through my elderly in-laws' home when they pass, and I am dreading the extent of the manual work. Two elderly people who live in a four bedroom home with a garage, garden and sheds. The place is so packed with stuff it feels small for them. They have just developed an interest in collecting stuffed toys and send me photos of each recently bought item, which adds a little bit more stress each time! Luckily, none of my three children are particularly sentimental, they are all very practical instead. This means I don't have to keep a huge collection of sentimental stuff for them, which is quite freeing. Now I sort out my stuff regularly and ask them if they want it. If not, I donate it straight away. 99% of the time, they say 'no'. Their attitude to stuff has taught me a lot.
I was today years old when I found out that Swedish death cleaning wasn't actually ferociously cleaning while listening to Swedish death metal (Swedecore). Honestly. I had never looked into it or explored it because of that. This is far more reasonable and reassuring hahaha. Makes so much sense to not leave things behind for someone else to deal with. I'm also like you re: shopping and the mall. I know what I want, where to look for it. And ideally in and out in under 20 mins.
I understand all of this! I have a a girlfriend who loves to shop! When we were young, we couldn't leave the mall as long as she had a nickel in her pocket! I personally have the hoarding instinct. A funny though. Growing up we were always running out of toilet paper. So as an adult I keep a month's supply minimum. This was a blessing during the pandemic!
This is a great video! I keep hearing about Swedish Death Cleaning but never really looked into it! I’m sad to say I fall more into the hoarder instinct based on its definition. Very eye opening! Thank you for explaining!
Amazing,inspirational video.....you summed it up so well.....do you want “the excess stuff “ to swallow up your life and family time or just let it go and start breathing and living again!!thanks for the great chats with the cup of tea👍💐💪🏻life changing....please keep making more😁
My grandma grew up in the depression and very poor. She was such a pioneer. A survivor. She made my dad shirts from feed sacks on the farm. Dad was born in the 40s. Neither he or my grandma were hoarders. She did reuse odd things like plastic /paper plates etc. but not a lot of clutter. My dad is 80 and we often talk about how he kept nothing of our childhood. He doesn’t like clutter. Mom had to hide it if she wanted to keep it for us. Lol. PS I’m a child of the 80s. I still LOVE THE MALL AND SHOPPING. even if it’s just to look. Lol. It’s therapy for me.
Clutter stresses me out everywhere except in my sewing room. It's a small bedroom and as a quilter, it makes me happy to have my fabric stash. As for death cleaning, as a 70 year old who doesn't want to leave this earthly plane any time soon, it just doesn't work for me. I am decluttering for my own peace of mind. They're just going to have to deal with my sewing room. I was raised to care for things so they last, so tossing good items is not pleasant. But you're right...things are made to be disposable these days.
As a fellow quilter, I agree! My daughter will have to deal with the sewing room. It is well organized, except the cutting table and the laundry basket under it. I get so excited to start a new project, I don't deal with the leftovers from the finished one! So a couple times a year, I clean off the table and sort, process and organize all the scraps and left over fabrics in the basket. The rest of the house will be neat and mostly clutter free once we finish remodeling. I don't like a lot of clutter. Both my husband and I's parents have hoarding tendancies, and we are already dreading dealing with their houses. We don't want to leave that stress for our daughter. But we do keep what we enjoy and we need to be comfortable, even if it isn't the traditional definition of minimal.
Thank you for this perspective. My mom keeps saying she keeps buying more and more things, because it helps her to not feel lonely. She is also a hoarder. I never understood what she was trying to tell me. I still don't completely understand it, but your words helped me to begin to understand her. Now if you have a solution, I am ALL ears... lol!
I'm sort of a #1 hybrid if I don't see it I won't use it but having minimal space keeps me from having things out. Maybe I don't need some of the things after all.
I hate clutter but have that fear of death you talked about. I have purged tons of clutter in my basement but need to go through the bins of baby clothes! My boys are 21, 19, and 10!!! It's time to let go, that season has passed! Thank you for the eye opener on why we need to declutter!
@@Mulberries69 I ended up giving almost all of their baby clothes to friends and family. I kept important first outfits and blankets! Everything else was sent to loving people who can use them! Thanks for the tip! ❤️
Am 54. I do this, but don't talk about it, since anyone unfamiliar with the topic (or minimalism in general) won't get it. I call it "Spring Cleaning!" ...whatever the season.
This is the first video I've seen of yours and I've watched a few videos of Swedish Death Cleaning and have had a discussion about it even with my boyfriend as we are moving into our house next year. Fortunately I haven't had to lose one of my parents, I'm nearly 18 years old but my mum doesn't clean or declutter she holds onto so much paper, clothes and crap whereas my room is clutter free! I actually decluttered my room again today. I try to declutter my room every week to 2 weeks not necessarily to get rid of things but also to see if I use things or not so that if I dont use it within 2 weeks I'll throw it away or if the next time I declutter I find something and think " i dont actually use or need this". It'll be hard when the time God takes my mum because me and my brothers will probably spend a good week going through my mum's house and I'll always, always make sure my children won't have to go through it💗
Thanks for the message Emma. Yes, I completely understand. I just went through some of my dad’s stuff last week. I don’t want to do this to my kids either
Great plan. I am doing so now. We had to "auction off" my mom's belongings. It was sad and we did it too early after her death. Many things had been in storage and there were many missing items. It caused alot of bad feelings. Other things showed up when questioned about them. It made me want to keep things I probably wouldn't have if things (and they are just things), were all intact and in order. We might have a box of jewelry, then a box of garage crap. I had to leave early, so that upset me. Also I found out things had been distributed after mom had to move from her home. Furniture, dishes, etc. I could not be at this cleaning and then I was helping my son's kitchen and there is my mom's silverware! He said they gave it to me when we moved grandma!!! I was shocked when he told me that his roommate got mom's table and living room furniture. I'm over it as far as being angry, and it taught me the importance of people over things. My mom was not a clutterbug, but when everything is in a heap, it seems like it's all junk. Like when you move and have all this stuff in boxes and realize you are moving the same old things that you never use. I've been trying to declutter for 25 years! I can't imagine if I hadn't done so... if I had kept all that, I would be buried in stuff! It's really hard when you have young adult children because three of my four kids still have stuff here and in my garage. I started to use some of their things, lol. Like cleaners, soaps, etc. I went over a year without buying shampoo! Do the cleaning now because things just multiply and pile up if you don't keep on top of things. Young people, take heed of this advice and you will be wealthier and live a more peaceful life without a bunch of worthless (at least to you) junk hanging around. Junk breeds in your cabinets as soon as you close the door.
I started this 25 years ago after my sister suddenly died. Seeing my mother struggling to clear out my sisters many possessions after see died was awful. I'm now trying to get my husband to understand this concept. I've told him his stuff is going straight in the rubbish when he's gone!!
I do have a Swedish Death Cleaning problem I need advice about. I was a jeweler/artist (retired now). I have a trunk full of 33 years of journals 🙄. I don’t want anyone to read them, I’ve been thinking about burning them🤔. I rarely look at them tho I have at times. I’ve been hung up on this for days now. Any advice please??? 🙏
Hmmm, do you want to keep them? If you don’t want someone reading them when you pass, you could find a trusted friend and ask them to take them and discard them. If you don’t want them anymore, you could burn them 🤷🏻♀️
I just like the words..... "Swedish Death Cleaning."!!! It's like... "I'm gonna clean until it kills me..!! But I gotta move to Sweden first.!!" HA My mother is 90 and I have been Swedish death cleaning her house.. And my own house as well... (I moved from a 2 story Victorian to a normal sized house. YIKES) Mom is loving it, b/c she knows everything is getting a new home somewhere.. if not with the kids or grands.. then someone at goodwill or a thrift shop.! She did grow up during the depression, but I have to say she was not bad at hoarding. Her mate seems to be worse about that. But he's doing a great job of letting go. I think he realizes its easier to clean when there's less clutter.!! jo
My mother passed away almost 3 years ago and she had alot of stuff, but it could have been worse because she had gone through a few years before and got rid of loads and loads of stuff. Unfortunately, she had progressing memory loss and she liked to go to the "GW" and would buy things because she had forgotten she already had one like it. Especially clothes. At one time she had 7 shirts in shades of aqua! Unfortunately, my father is even worse about not getting rid of ANYTHING. So, he said, nothing goes out of the house without him approving. As a result, at least half of mom's stuff is still in the house. He doesn't go back the hall and look at it, it's just there. Now he's in poor health and we can't get him to part with anything, his or hers. He has 2 huge buildings filled with old tractors, a bulldozer, parts and pieces, wood, etc. My brother wants to clean it up and he simply won't allow it. We are dreading the day he passes, and it gets closer every day.
Thankfully, I don't identify with any of them😊 I have been on a decluttering journey since 2019 and feel that minimalism paves the way for smoother Swedish death cleaning.
Totally guilt of the clutter instinct I can't live with empty spaces and love busy places my dream places are the marrocain market places... I feel uncomfortable at my friends house where everything is Grey and tidy
@@MinimalistHome It’s fascinating! A bunch of modern day artists got together and decided to build a medieval castle using only medieval techniques, they re still working on it to this day.
Shopping and the acquiring of so much stuff has been made worse with the explosion of credit cards since our parents time. I believe minimal lifestyles are now the revolt against credit and mindless spending.
My mom is a severe hoarder of trash and junk jewelry her house literally with a one-way path that I had to clean out in March because she fell down and couldn't get back up at 81 years old of course you're going to have an issue getting up but as we told her a long time ago the paramedics would not be able to get a gurney in there and all she does is whine about where all of her stuff is at and why did she have to give it up it makes me angry that she doesn't care about anybody but herself saving tomatoes because you buy too many of them and they're really rotting when you're trying to tell everybody that you're drying them
That line you said really resonated with me- "You can't keep every season forever." I think that's a line perfect for most clutterbugs
sad but true
When I first heard about this type of decluttering, it felt odd but I read the book & realized the true meaning. I don't want our adult kids to have to go through so much stuff then needed. I had to do this with 2 family members & it took so long & the emotional battle was difficult. I am glad I read the book & watched many videos on the subject. We are decluttering as much as we can not to burden family members with our stuff when our day arrives to meet our Lord. It feels good to have peace now for us & peace for them later. Thanks for your videos.
Good for you!!
When my Mom passed my siblings and myself had the task of clearing out my parents home to sell .We had to make many decisions in what to do with her belongings. It was very hard to do, we all took a few things that reminded of us of our parents. Fast forward to few months after, and I decided I would never put our daughter in that position , especially she is very sentimental.I started in my junk drawer and Swedish death cleaned my whole house. I was never a clutter bug, but to be honest it took me at least 6 months donated,selling , and throwing away. This was 5 years ago now, I love living intentionally, I also only shop now when I need something. I don’t like shopping anymore, because I’m really not interested in bringing anything into my spacious , calm home. My daughter jokes with me, she said one day it will take her a weekend to clear my house…. I have a long time till that day comes God willing, but I know my daughter and son in law will not have the daunting task of what my siblings and I had…
It’s a way to make your children life easy when the time comes. My husband and I also went to estate lawyer and all our finances are taken care of for her, that was the best money we could have spent
You have given your daughter a wonderful gift. We have done the same thing as you have, and now have such a feeling of peace knowing that we won't leave our kids with a huge project.
@@kathrynwebster6307 thank you, it really does being peace knowing that your children won’t have to make decisions, and even going to estate lawyer, my husband and I made it as easy as it can be for her…
You as well are giving your children a wonderful gift ❤️
You are so kind to do that for you family. Good job!
@@MinimalistHome thank you, I love your channel so much ❤️
A message from an older person to all you younger people: don’t buy so much stuff! Buy mindfully! It’ll make things much easier for you later in life.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom!!!! 💕
We can’t keep every season forever! I REALLY NEEDED that one! I just spent the last several years cleaning out my mother’s stuff. She was a classic depression kid, born in 1929 even! Started a looooong time ago cleaning out my stuff because I disliked that my ow mother’s houses was so cluttered. For years, I did well…..moving always helped because we moved ourselves. But now at 63, her stuff is dealt with for the most part; my three children have taken the things that they wanted; I’ve begun giving them some of my stuff. So it is catching me by surprise that, at this stage, I am struggling. I feel it in my body first, and recognize that some emotion is inside me……but identifying it and undoing it via my mental health tools has been perplexing. I was STUCK. That one line however is helping sooooo much! I don’t really know what season I am in, and it is scaring the HELL out of me! That is the lump I my throat and the tightening in my chest that I am experiencing! 2023 is my year to explore new things! My mom is gone. My children are all grown and happy in their chosen trajectories. My hubs is retired and satisfied with his life now. He is seven years older, and it took him a long while to redefine himself but has success in it. (I’m not messin’ with that!). But for me? I want something new! Not stuff. Looking at MY STUFF now reminds me that I am no longer in those seasons. So thank you!
I de-cluttered and downsized to a 900 sq. ft. apartment. I gave away 3/4 of my possessions to accommodate my new space. So glad I did it. I haven't missed a thing! It is so freeing to have less stuff and to live an intentionally simpler life. And... I'm no longer embarrassed if someone drops in unannounced. That's what hoarders live in fear of- being embarrassed to have anyone see how they live. My sister in law hasn't let anyone into her home in 10 years due to her hoarding. It's so sad.
That is very sad Kathryn
I love that you said “ that’s from another season of life”. Very useful for me!!
Right!
We were planning a move last summer so we loaded up 6-7 loads of excess to the dump, made many, many trips to recycle and donating stores, and packed and moved half of our remaining stuff to the barn! Our home didn't sell,and we didn't move😵. We really love the look of our home which is so much more open, and much easier to care for. We're not sure whether to try to sell again or just stay put for awhile. BUT, we've decided to bring back to the home a few boxes at a time and really get ruthless about what we want to live with or take if we do move! It's amazing the amount of possessions we accumulated and we have been doing periodic purges along the way! I just don't want to cart around or care for a lot of these things any longer! We're both in our 70's and it's past time for us to "lighten the load"! Our daughter has enough going on in her life to not have to deal with our stuff! I bought and read the book on the art death cleaning but just didn't get as much downsizing done as I should have. That is now my number one priority. Subscribed and will be watching all your videos, past and future😎
We’re moving soon and after packing what we wanted to keep from each room, we sold and gave away the excess. It feels great to let go and move on with our best.
That sounds wonderful!
I also identify with all three! My mom grew up in the depression & our basement & home was full of things. She would take things out of the trash that I threw out & bring it back in the housel I also like to have things around and deal with how life is short. Egads. Your videos are so insightful and helpful. I am decluttering so much now that I am retired and do not want my daughters to have to deal with "all this STUFF". Thank you so much for all your time and effort to make these videos to help others. Bless you.
Oh, thank you Loretta! I'm glad you found this video helpful!!
My grandma, a child of the depression, passed away at 90. She lived in the family farmhouse. Emptying the house felt like it had died, too. Five generations of "Don't get rid of that, you might need it someday!" was kind of impressive! We even found a trunk that must have come across from Ireland with the family, full of paperwork from the 1870s. So sad to disperse the stuff! So many buried antiques and interesting things! I hated watching it. 😟. I strive to make my own house less interesting, though, but I did put many of her things back into use.
Thanks for sharing Marci. I can only imagine what that was like!
All of the old stuff and treasures can be interesting and a window to another time. It sounds like your grandparents held onto some wonderful memories.
Adults who lived through the depression had an understanding of why they kept things. For the children who lived through it, that was all they knew, so that's how they raised their children too. Often, the mindset of keeping things was handed down, but the reason was lost. It was necessary to keep things during the depression because things were hard to come by. Later it was considered frugal. No need to be wasteful just because you have a little money in your pocket. But for the next generation, it became a problem rather than a solve. Those of us who were the children of the depression era generation kids kept everything because that's what we were taught to do, not because we actually needed to in order to survive. We were able to obtain things more easily than our parents, but we kept everything because we didn't learn about getting rid of things and why that is necessary. Our parents probably never learned that themselves. At some point, we find ourselves living in decades of useless items. The treasures and memories are lost because there is so much. We are learning now to tell the difference between trash and treasure from the grandchildren and great grandchildren of the depression era generation. Instead of living in and leaving behind a burden of clutter, we hope to live in and leave behind interesting stuff like your grandparents did. My sister decorates her home in antiques. Her home is full of interest. It would be heartbreaking to see it go. My house just has boxes of junk that I didn't know I was allowed to get rid of. That's the difference. My sister made it work. I think your grandparents did it right if you were so touched by the things they left behind. How lovely that you got to experience that. 😄❤
We use cloth diapers when we no longer needed those diapers. They made great Tea, towels
This is the first of your videos I've seen - I am now a subscriber. I have been intrigued by Swedish death cleaning but have not bought the book. The history was interesting and inspiring. I started decluttering because I didn't want my son to deal with all of our things when we die. My mother's house was a disaster! It took a week to clean it out. My ultra-organized and tidy mother-in-law's house took less than a day. I decided then, that an easy clean out was what I wanted to leave to my son, not a houseful of stuff that would end up at the thrift store anyway. I formerly had all three instincts, but now I only struggle with the instinct of clutter. I still have a hard time letting go of the items I grew up seeing in my home and my grandparent's homes. I have to keep reminding myself that their legacy is who I became because of their influence, not what of theirs surrounds me. I used to have the instinct of hoarding, but when everything in every store started looking the same, I became disinterested in shopping. And then I stopped thrifting when I decided on a no spend year. As for fear of death - decluttering taught me to let go of the fantasy that I would repurpose all these "useable" items - I'll leave that to someone else with more time and less to do! Thank you again for this channel.
Yay! You are doing fantastic Anne, I love how you explained how you've dealt with the instincts
A recent presentation on decluttering suggested to share the story and significance behind the item. Then it has served the purpose and the actual item can be released.
I'm very relieved to not have any of these three issues!
My Swedish death cleaning habits right now are focused on scanning and discarding things like old snapshots, negatives, and unneeded paperwork--because as we get older, physical movements become more difficult, and I don't want to be hauling around heavy boxes and stuffed-to-the-brim suitcases when I'm in my sixties. I am 51 now, and I want to maintain these good declutting habits to avoid the physical (and emotional!) strain of moving unnecessary "stuff" when my body is no longer capable of doing so.
Very smart!
This is a great video. Makes you stop and think about why people hold on to things. My daughter just turned 18 and holds on to everything. I'm going to share this video with her. Have a great day!
Great idea! Thanks! You have a great day too!
Ah, you just hit the nail on the head for me ... 'that's from a different season of life has passed ... we can't keep every season forever' ... Since finding you and your channel I've been able to let go of lots of clutter and clean so much better ... I am sooo grateful!
That sentence hit me too. I am done having babies... I don't need the bassinet! But it makes me sad for sure
Yay! I'm so happy Bonnie! Thank you!
I relate to all 3 of these instincts. Both my mother and father grew up during the Depression, and kept everything "just in case" in order to not have to buy it again someday. I picked up this habit as well. At 49, and both parents have passed, I am still dealing with their belongings. I don't have children of my own, so its less about me leaving things behind for them, and more about putting monetary value on things. I spent this much for that item, sure would hate to have to buy it again down the road if I got rid of it...I despise the clutter in my very modest 1200 sq.ft. house, but I find it hard to let things go. I am definitely working on this, as I just want to have a peaceful, tidy, everything in its place, sanctuary to call home. Love your channel! Thank you for giving us hope in getting our clutter under control.
Thanks Kathy!! I'm glad to help! Good insights for sure
At 54 already started. In 4 years I retire and downsizing..want to have it as stress free as possible.
You are spot on about the depression. My parents grew up during that time and those mindsets were handed down to us. I've learned that my natural instinct is clear space, but it has battled with that taught mindset my whole life. When my mom died, I started letting all of that go. I am slowly decluttering and becoming my true self. In the process, I have learned that my hubby "likes stuff" so I try to find the balance. It slows my progress, but I want both of us to be comfortable in our home, so I'm okay with it. I've had decades of practice living with mess and compromise, so finding the compromise doesn't bother me as bad as it might bother others. Decluttering my own stuff keeps me busy and makes it better. I just work around hubby's stuff. 😄
Good plan Melinda!
@@MinimalistHome After commenting here, I saw your post about your dad. I'm so sorry. I've been through it too. Both of my parents are gone now. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
We moved into my husband's grandparents house in 2001 when they paseed.
Remember the "FRIENDS" episode. When they went through Ross's grandmother's stuff. They opened the closet the the sweet-low packets came falling out?
They how it was for us! Not to mention the pie tins. Captain D's to go packets, (forks, spoons, napkins, ect.). Lol!
We live on their farm. We are still getting rid of STUFF! 22 years later.
It has been hard but we are finally getting somewhere.
Oh goodness!! Good for you!
I love the concept of Swedish death cleaning, although I disliked the book quite a bit. Of those instincts (none of which actually qualify as “instincts“), what resonates most for me is wanting to keep things around that are useful or might be useful because I am very frugal. However, after helping to clear out both my grandmother’s and my mother-in-law‘s very cluttered homes when they died, I do not want to leave that sort of mess to my children. And I also find visual clutter distressing. I am really committed to working toward minimalism in my home.
Good for you!!
Great video. My grandparents lived through the great depression and they each hoarded in different ways. My grandfather had to have a cetain amount of canned food items. The inventory couldn't get lower than say 12 cans. I don't know if that was his number, but he had a number. My grandmother hoarded everything else. When I helped her clean a spared bedroomn closet she had a wedding dress of one of her deceased daughter in laws. =/ She didn't even remember how she came to obtain it. And she had a hard time getting rid of stuff. She had a very large "think about it" pile. And her poor kids had to go through all of her stuff when they passed. That will not happen to my kids.
My parents lived in Amsterdam during the war as a young couple with babies and yes, my mother kept everything when we were moving her from her house to an apartment she had pears that she had canned in jars that she kept Trying to get us to take because they’re still OK to eat even though you can see the parents are falling apart. I finally had to tell my sisters to take it. You can throw it away when you’re home the jar still works
You have a knack for telling me things I already know deep down but haven't accepted. And in doing so, you're inspiring me and helping me change my life ❤🧡💛💚💙💜
That's great! Thanks!
My two sisters and I were traumatised when we had to clear my mum's home after she died. We spent so much time crying and often had to go home during the process to calm down. I am glad I will never have to go through that experience again. I will have to go through my elderly in-laws' home when they pass, and I am dreading the extent of the manual work. Two elderly people who live in a four bedroom home with a garage, garden and sheds. The place is so packed with stuff it feels small for them. They have just developed an interest in collecting stuffed toys and send me photos of each recently bought item, which adds a little bit more stress each time! Luckily, none of my three children are particularly sentimental, they are all very practical instead. This means I don't have to keep a huge collection of sentimental stuff for them, which is quite freeing. Now I sort out my stuff regularly and ask them if they want it. If not, I donate it straight away. 99% of the time, they say 'no'. Their attitude to stuff has taught me a lot.
A tough way to learn but I’m glad you know how you want to handle things now!
"The fear and realization that nothing is permanent" and "we can't keep every season forever" Ack! That's true!
yay!! Glad you liked it
I was today years old when I found out that Swedish death cleaning wasn't actually ferociously cleaning while listening to Swedish death metal (Swedecore). Honestly. I had never looked into it or explored it because of that. This is far more reasonable and reassuring hahaha. Makes so much sense to not leave things behind for someone else to deal with.
I'm also like you re: shopping and the mall. I know what I want, where to look for it. And ideally in and out in under 20 mins.
Haha, Swedecore! Love it!
Thank you for this lovely and very important discussion.
Thank you
I understand all of this! I have a a girlfriend who loves to shop! When we were young, we couldn't leave the mall as long as she had a nickel in her pocket!
I personally have the hoarding instinct. A funny though. Growing up we were always running out of toilet paper. So as an adult I keep a month's supply minimum. This was a blessing during the pandemic!
Haha, that makes a lot of sense!
yees! the 3rd random vid on YT , i have concidered channging my plummer cause every time i try to communicate its just bubbles
I loved this video! I’ve watched hundreds of videos on minimalism but never one like this.
Thanks Jude Dude!!
This is a great video! I keep hearing about Swedish Death Cleaning but never really looked into it! I’m sad to say I fall more into the hoarder instinct based on its definition. Very eye opening! Thank you for explaining!
That's ok because now you recognize it!
thank you for this message ! very powerful. inspiring :) so much wisdom, thank you so much 😘🌟✨❤️
Thank you Luna!
Amazing,inspirational video.....you summed it up so well.....do you want “the excess stuff “ to swallow up your life and family time or just let it go and start breathing and living again!!thanks for the great chats with the cup of tea👍💐💪🏻life changing....please keep making more😁
Yes! Thanks so much!
My grandma grew up in the depression and very poor. She was such a pioneer. A survivor. She made my dad shirts from feed sacks on the farm. Dad was born in the 40s. Neither he or my grandma were hoarders. She did reuse odd things like plastic /paper plates etc. but not a lot of clutter. My dad is 80 and we often talk about how he kept nothing of our childhood. He doesn’t like clutter. Mom had to hide it if she wanted to keep it for us. Lol. PS I’m a child of the 80s. I still LOVE THE MALL AND SHOPPING. even if it’s just to look. Lol. It’s therapy for me.
Haha, I get it!!
Shopping raises dopamine levels; even if u don't buy anything. There's SCIENCE on this!
Loved the concept ❤️🩹
Clutter stresses me out everywhere except in my sewing room. It's a small bedroom and as a quilter, it makes me happy to have my fabric stash. As for death cleaning, as a 70 year old who doesn't want to leave this earthly plane any time soon, it just doesn't work for me. I am decluttering for my own peace of mind. They're just going to have to deal with my sewing room. I was raised to care for things so they last, so tossing good items is not pleasant. But you're right...things are made to be disposable these days.
It' is from April Lacheur Art aprillacheurart.com
As a fellow quilter, I agree! My daughter will have to deal with the sewing room. It is well organized, except the cutting table and the laundry basket under it. I get so excited to start a new project, I don't deal with the leftovers from the finished one! So a couple times a year, I clean off the table and sort, process and organize all the scraps and left over fabrics in the basket. The rest of the house will be neat and mostly clutter free once we finish remodeling. I don't like a lot of clutter. Both my husband and I's parents have hoarding tendancies, and we are already dreading dealing with their houses. We don't want to leave that stress for our daughter. But we do keep what we enjoy and we need to be comfortable, even if it isn't the traditional definition of minimal.
Thank you for this perspective. My mom keeps saying she keeps buying more and more things, because it helps her to not feel lonely. She is also a hoarder. I never understood what she was trying to tell me. I still don't completely understand it, but your words helped me to begin to understand her. Now if you have a solution, I am ALL ears... lol!
Very sad. Hoarding disorder definitely require professional help
Maybe your Mom can get a part-time job?
Or, volunteer at a animal shelter/ thrift store? Or , an assisted living facility? Hospital?
@@lisagavin3402 Thank you, those are great ideas!! I will have to explore those ideas with her :)
I'm sort of a #1 hybrid if I don't see it I won't use it but having minimal space keeps me from having things out. Maybe I don't need some of the things after all.
Yes and sometimes too much stuff is out so we don’t see it anyway!
You sound like a visual organizer. The " clutter bug " on TH-cam can help you recognize your style so you can make it all work better for you.
I hate clutter but have that fear of death you talked about. I have purged tons of clutter in my basement but need to go through the bins of baby clothes! My boys are 21, 19, and 10!!! It's time to let go, that season has passed!
Thank you for the eye opener on why we need to declutter!
Thanks!! And good for you!
With a few fave baby shirts, u can stuff them & sew them shut & make small pillows. 😊❤
@@Mulberries69 I ended up giving almost all of their baby clothes to friends and family. I kept important first outfits and blankets! Everything else was sent to loving people who can use them! Thanks for the tip! ❤️
Am 54. I do this, but don't talk about it, since anyone unfamiliar with the topic (or minimalism in general) won't get it. I call it "Spring Cleaning!" ...whatever the season.
Ooooh very smart!
Excellent video.
Thank you Bridget!
I get this. My mom wants to see everything she has. I want a chair in a room. Fill my space with music!
That's great!
Oh, that's so beautiful and inspiring!💜
This is the first video I've seen of yours and I've watched a few videos of Swedish Death Cleaning and have had a discussion about it even with my boyfriend as we are moving into our house next year. Fortunately I haven't had to lose one of my parents, I'm nearly 18 years old but my mum doesn't clean or declutter she holds onto so much paper, clothes and crap whereas my room is clutter free! I actually decluttered my room again today. I try to declutter my room every week to 2 weeks not necessarily to get rid of things but also to see if I use things or not so that if I dont use it within 2 weeks I'll throw it away or if the next time I declutter I find something and think " i dont actually use or need this". It'll be hard when the time God takes my mum because me and my brothers will probably spend a good week going through my mum's house and I'll always, always make sure my children won't have to go through it💗
Thanks for the message Emma. Yes, I completely understand. I just went through some of my dad’s stuff last week. I don’t want to do this to my kids either
Great plan. I am doing so now. We had to "auction off" my mom's belongings. It was sad and we did it too early after her death. Many things had been in storage and there were many missing items. It caused alot of bad feelings. Other things showed up when questioned about them. It made me want to keep things I probably wouldn't have if things (and they are just things), were all intact and in order. We might have a box of jewelry, then a box of garage crap. I had to leave early, so that upset me. Also I found out things had been distributed after mom had to move from her home. Furniture, dishes, etc. I could not be at this cleaning and then I was helping my son's kitchen and there is my mom's silverware! He said they gave it to me when we moved grandma!!! I was shocked when he told me that his roommate got mom's table and living room furniture. I'm over it as far as being angry, and it taught me the importance of people over things. My mom was not a clutterbug, but when everything is in a heap, it seems like it's all junk. Like when you move and have all this stuff in boxes and realize you are moving the same old things that you never use. I've been trying to declutter for 25 years! I can't imagine if I hadn't done so... if I had kept all that, I would be buried in stuff! It's really hard when you have young adult children because three of my four kids still have stuff here and in my garage. I started to use some of their things, lol. Like cleaners, soaps, etc. I went over a year without buying shampoo!
Do the cleaning now because things just multiply and pile up if you don't keep on top of things. Young people, take heed of this advice and you will be wealthier and live a more peaceful life without a bunch of worthless (at least to you) junk hanging around. Junk breeds in your cabinets as soon as you close the door.
Very nice video!
Thanks Shanna
I started this 25 years ago after my sister suddenly died. Seeing my mother struggling to clear out my sisters many possessions after see died was awful. I'm now trying to get my husband to understand this concept. I've told him his stuff is going straight in the rubbish when he's gone!!
It’s a good strategy for sure. Sorry about your sister
Please say where you got that great artwork behind you on your wall!
Hey Fancy Nancy! I got it from April Lacheur aprillacheurart.com
I do have a Swedish Death Cleaning problem I need advice about. I was a jeweler/artist (retired now). I have a trunk full of 33 years of journals 🙄. I don’t want anyone to read them, I’ve been thinking about burning them🤔. I rarely look at them tho I have at times. I’ve been hung up on this for days now. Any advice please??? 🙏
Hmmm, do you want to keep them? If you don’t want someone reading them when you pass, you could find a trusted friend and ask them to take them and discard them. If you don’t want them anymore, you could burn them 🤷🏻♀️
So that’s why I’m doing all the shopping online
Very good video!!
Thank you Rene!
I just like the words..... "Swedish Death Cleaning."!!! It's like... "I'm gonna clean until it kills me..!! But I gotta move to Sweden first.!!" HA My mother is 90 and I have been Swedish death cleaning her house.. And my own house as well... (I moved from a 2 story Victorian to a normal sized house. YIKES) Mom is loving it, b/c she knows everything is getting a new home somewhere.. if not with the kids or grands.. then someone at goodwill or a thrift shop.! She did grow up during the depression, but I have to say she was not bad at hoarding. Her mate seems to be worse about that. But he's doing a great job of letting go. I think he realizes its easier to clean when there's less clutter.!! jo
Thanks great! Thanks for sharing
I personally, can't relate to any of these instincts, but my husband is all THREE. LOL!!!
Love your cat🥰😻💕
My mom taught me to window shop which led to shopaholic habits once i had paychecks. Now i hate shopping.
Oh goodness Victoria, that's a shame
I loved that Victorian farm show
It's the best!
lol I had the same reaction when I turned 10. I was freaked that my childhood was over lol
isn’t that funny??
My mother passed away almost 3 years ago and she had alot of stuff, but it could have been worse because she had gone through a few years before and got rid of loads and loads of stuff. Unfortunately, she had progressing memory loss and she liked to go to the "GW" and would buy things because she had forgotten she already had one like it. Especially clothes. At one time she had 7 shirts in shades of aqua! Unfortunately, my father is even worse about not getting rid of ANYTHING. So, he said, nothing goes out of the house without him approving. As a result, at least half of mom's stuff is still in the house. He doesn't go back the hall and look at it, it's just there. Now he's in poor health and we can't get him to part with anything, his or hers. He has 2 huge buildings filled with old tractors, a bulldozer, parts and pieces, wood, etc. My brother wants to clean it up and he simply won't allow it. We are dreading the day he passes, and it gets closer every day.
That sounds really hard Gin. Lots of work ahead, but unfortunately it’s hard to change some people’s way, especially so late in life
Tt the mantle made me feel nervous with nothing on it
Thankfully, I don't identify with any of them😊
I have been on a decluttering journey since 2019 and feel that minimalism paves the way for smoother Swedish death cleaning.
Ohhhh yes!
My mom had to wear flour-sack dresses as a girl, and when she had me she vowed never to send me to school in homemade clothes.
Aww, that is sweet
Totally guilt of the clutter instinct I can't live with empty spaces and love busy places my dream places are the marrocain market places... I feel uncomfortable at my friends house where everything is Grey and tidy
That's great that you enjoy it and aren't bothered by it
I like those old shows too ike Victorian Farm. Check out Guedelon Castle in France to see more from that group of historians.
Oh I will, thanks!
@@MinimalistHome It’s fascinating! A bunch of modern day artists got together and decided to build a medieval castle using only medieval techniques, they re still working on it to this day.
Shopping and the acquiring of so much stuff has been made worse with the explosion of credit cards since our parents time. I believe minimal lifestyles are now the revolt against credit and mindless spending.
I agree
Clutter is not always untidy.
Anybody else notice we basically all have the same clutter?!
yeeeep
OMG! That is me!!!!
Haha, me too!
Loved hearing this!
Thanks Juelmarie!
Did this death cleaning book talk about animals like they're objects to get rid of? That's what I heard.
I am retired now. The term Swedish Death Cleaning is depressing. Makes me feel like I’m m going to die any minute now.
It is a little morbid, but I like to turn it around and see that life is a gift and I don’t want to live it beholden to things
Looking at the affairs of the world today, we might again need to hold onto everything we have.
In the event of a true emergency, we will be better off with only our most useful and valuable items.
Im dead , You want my properties , my money my collections , You deal with all the stuff its worth a lot of money !!!
☺️
Raised by depression era parents
Yep, I get it
Shopping shouldn’t be a “ hobby “ or an “ entertainment “.
Didn't you used to say Hi Beauties? I think I miss that.
I did!! Maybe I'll bring it back soon!
My mom is a severe hoarder of trash and junk jewelry her house literally with a one-way path that I had to clean out in March because she fell down and couldn't get back up at 81 years old of course you're going to have an issue getting up but as we told her a long time ago the paramedics would not be able to get a gurney in there and all she does is whine about where all of her stuff is at and why did she have to give it up it makes me angry that she doesn't care about anybody but herself saving tomatoes because you buy too many of them and they're really rotting when you're trying to tell everybody that you're drying them
unless you want to live in an empty space someone else will have to deal with the rest. Oh well...
I wouldn't recommend decluttering all of your stuff, just the things that aren't serving you.
You are too young to understand this book. She suggests starting at 65
Never too early to plan for the future