Sorry to hear you're going through it at the moment Angie. Although it might not be possible for you to believe me right now, just know that the majority of your followers here see you as a whole person. A person who is talented, strong, funny and yes, flawed - and we love you for that.
Honesty is the best policy Angelica. If only you knew the number of times I couldn't get out of bed, couldn't shower, and the only way I would manage after a few days was by watching your videos and finally getting inspired by your colorful soul and vibrant makeup. Sometimes life turns in black and white for no reason but a chemical one. I hope you can ride this wave with kindness and gentle care. Warm hugs from Melbourne, Australia
Doing my makeup was one of the first signs to myself that I was emerging from a deep depression. Little lovely things like makeup may seem silly to others but they keep us alive, keep us going. Thanks for this
Same here, but a little in reverse. If I not putting makeup on every day, it tells I am starting to slip and need to do the things that can help me. When I start getting excited to put it on again, like you, I know I am getting better. Its a comfort to me to understand my own signs and be able, in some small ways, to better manage my mental health. I am glad you can see them too
I'm diagnostic with cronical depression and anxiety. Your my favorite TH-camr, thank you so much for talk about this. I jus wanna say that in my worst days, your videos make me smile, and thats a lot ❤️
OMG That feeling of never being done is why I went back to school to become a nurse when I was a photographer. I turned something creative and artistic into something I dreaded because I had to do it.
Yeeeeah that's why I didn't follow my artistic path. I didn't want to turn it into dreaded work. Took the science path and became a nurse haha. Art is MY time
That is exactly why I haven't parlayed all my creative passions into a career, I don't want the pressure to rob me of the joy they give me. That goes for cooking, baking, dance, makeup artistry even. My job is a corporate job, 9 to 5pm. I get to have fun with my creativity in my evenings and weekends.
I found the best way to describe clinical depression & anxiety to ppl is to explain its like the soundtrack to a movie that you have no way of changing. Except the movie is you’re life and you have no control over the music. Then I explain how you can see the opening of a movie with a little girl skipping down a sidewalk on a sunny day & if the music is upbeat or gentle, you know it’s a feel good family movie; but take that same scene and change the music to something dark & ominous, & suddenly you know the movie is dark &/or scary. Depression/anxiety is like that. Nothing is different about your life but evrything feels wrong. It’s like your life’s soundtrack has suddenly became dark, moody, scary, etc. It effects how you see and experience the world.
Mental Health, especially clinical depression is a Biatch!! I feel ya!! Keep taking care of yourself and take a win anywhere you can😊. You are on TH-cam talking about it today ..BIG WIN!!
You don't need to apologize, there are more of us who struggle with depression than you might think. I have been diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety, and PTSD, I see a counselor regularly, I take meds, and on really bad days I just sleep. Make up therapy is just as valid as art therapy in my mind. Ice cream helps too, at least it does for me.
I have had clinical depression. It has been so bad that I was hospitalized. It’s definitely a different kind of depression than what people say when they are just sad. It hurts to move. It hurts to think. It’s so impressive that you pushed yourself to do something to cheer yourself up because it isn’t easy when you feel that way. Keep talking to us. We like hearing your thoughts.
I’ve also been struggling with my depression lately… know you’re not alone. My therapist has been encouraging me to practice more self care and treating myself with kindness. Not a cure by any means, but it’s one small thing we can do. You’re beautiful, kind, and intelligent, and you will get through this. Talking about it helps, and thank you for being open and sharing with us.
Omg! I can’t believe people say “you look sad/you look depressed/you look tired”. I just want you to know that I watch ALOT of your videos, if not all of them, and I NEVER think you look like any of that. You look beautiful and vibrant and glowing every time I see you. Life really isn’t perfect. I can vouch for that haha 😳. And tbh your vulnerability in this video is just a breath of fresh air. Happy Wednesday! I hope today brings excitement and joy into your atmosphere and if it doesn’t that’s ok too. ♥️♥️♥️
It’s just as bad as when somebody says “you look good” to try to drum up some positivity for somebody that’s dealing with chronic illness and struggling through a tough time
@kr911, you mean well, but when somebody is feeling really really unwell it’s a statement for you to feel better about them not doing good more than it is for them because when I feel bad and know I’m looking unwell it does not make me feel good to be told I look good because it’s not true
Fellow clinically depressed person , 👋🏻. I'm listening to you with love and support, Angie. Big hugs from California! (Also, thanks for the like yesterday on Instagram. I literally got giddy through a migraine and told all my family my favorite youtuber saw my post with her palette!)
I also struggle with depression and I feel guilty for not being happy. But then I remind myself depression is an illness not a feeling. I think people who have never experienced it have a difficult time understanding that. Sending you much love.
Angie - You're one of the most uplifting, inspiring content creators in the makeup community. I'm sorry you're struggling with your mental health. I really do hope things will get back on track for you, wishing you nothing but the best, good vibes and lots of love from Canada
As someone who's just getting back on her feet after a long depression and still have those days, I feel for you. I think we all can't understand to the full extent what the others is going through, even when we have the same diagnosis, but we can show empathy. I'm sorry you are going through this in general and I hope you will get better soon. The climate on social media is why I hide my makeup IG account (it's private, for me mostly) and never went for a YT account because I would have done it for fun and I don't have th energy to suffer through this when added to my actual job and life. You are amazing, such a brilliant light in a space that isn't always pretty. Your intelligence, sense of humour, creativity and all around beautiful personality is such a nice presence to refer to everyday. When I need someone'S voice when I work home alone, when I need inspiration or whatever, I'm glad I can turn to you and your channel. 💜 get well soon
I love this look... orange is special to me because I am Indigenous and we wear orange on Sept 30th here in Canada to honor all the children who didn't survive Indian Residential School... I know this is a sad topic but for me I am proud I am here because I am a residential school survivor .. I am also a journalist and I have days when I feel the weight of the job and make up always makes me feel better 🥰🧡 thank you for sharing with us I feel honored to have shared this time with you
I totally feel you when it comes to the "I just wanna talk." and I'm happy you feel comfortable enough with your community and this channel to do so. I don't think this video was a downer. Sometimes it's really nice to just listen to other people talking about their thoughts and feelings. Esspecially if it makes you feel a bit better Videos don't always have to be positive. Life isn't eather. I wish you all the best and hope you will get some relief soon. Thank you for your videos and your honesty. We love you
Even without clinical depression, feelings can just be overwhelming. Everyone has their own perspective on things. Nobody should tell you how to feel or how to be. I commend you for living a life online, because that has to be difficult. Random people making judgements and comments that are either a snippet of you or not even real to begin with. You are allowed to FEEL! Give yourself as much grace as possible…even if it’s hard. I’ve never met you, but I think you are amazing. Sending lots of love ❤️
I feel you girl, depression doesn't need to have a reason, you just feel like sh*t and you don't necessarily know why, I was diagnosed with depression twice and I'm under medication for more than a year, it still sucks sometimes but doing much better most of the days... hope you find the help that you need to get back on your feet. Big kiss from Portugal.
Thank you for saying that about others diagnosing you. I don't need that or want that either. Sometimes it comes and there is no reason you can see or put your finger on. I understand because I have been dealing with depression for a long time. One thing that helped me was a therapist told me I am not my depression. So I try to separate it from who I am. Depression is something you can not just snap out of it. Those people don't understand. Sounds like you are taking care of yourself. Life is hard. You are amazing and thank you for your videos and you make me smile.
I have too 100 % agree with you ❤ i hope you feel better soon honey but please remember that you are amazing and that you deserve happiness and too feel like you are worth so much too your loved ones ❤ please stay strong my lovely 💟💟 P.s i know i am a complete stranger but i just thought I'd reply to your comment 😇😇
17:12 When are struggling, we long for community, even though it might make us vulnerable to attack. Thank you for making this video, clinical depression is indeed a disorder, almost like an autoimmune disorder... It attacks our own brains and bodies even as we try to heal them, or if nothing is "really" wrong. It's a tough job, and I'm glad we have things to cheer us up and family + friends + professionals to support us. ❤️
Angie thank you for doing this video I have been diagnosed with clinical anxious depression since I was 13 years old, I am now 30. İt went and came on and off but for the past 5 years it is always on... I can't finish PhD thesis I can't do anything right but I am trying to live. I feel less alone when you speak about your mental health and this orange look is on fire I loved it. Thank you again for making me feel less alone ❤️🙏🏻
Mental health is never easy to talk about. Mainly because it's hard to understand. It never makes sense. And that'd frustrating in itself. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to open up and immediately shut down because trying to explain just feels more complicated. I know it probably doesn't mean much but your an amazing person to be able to do that. And I respect you soooo much more for this video. Your beautiful soul inside and out. One thing that always stuck with me is one breath at a time. One minute at a time. It's "easier" to exist
I don't know if you're reading this, and if it will mean something to you, but I've been watching your videos for at least 3 years and I'm looking for new content from you every day. What you do is meaningful and appreciated by many people, and I am one of them
As a self-employed person with major impostor syndrome & having had a full-on breakdown yesterday right in the middle of a severe depressive episode, watching this helped me beyond any words. Thank you so much for sharing your troubles as well as your wonderful talent. I think as your community, we understand what you're going through, and I for one in turn feel understood, which is so important when dealing with our issues. All the love and strength to you!
1st: I love videos of you just doing an eyeshadow looks & talking. It’s like a tutorial to me. 2nd: Your not alone. I’m 52 and I had depression in waves for over 30 years starting when I was in preschool and would have feelings of terror attacks. Praise God I was able to finally find what works. A lot of us understand. And lastly: Give yourself some understanding. You’re not only in a new country but you’re also in culture shock. You may be overwhelmed. Just keep reminding yourself it’s normal and it will soon get better. That helped me sometimes to tell myself “it’s going to be alright”. Because it eventually does. Meanwhile I’ll pray you feel better sooner than later. 🙏 God bless you. 🤗
I am currently in DBT for severe depression and my anxiety and panic disorders. Don’t let anyone minimize what you go through! Many of us live with it every day. We really are the strong ones because we fight a silent battle almost constantly. 💪🏻
Angie, I understand in more ways I can count. I had severe social anxiety and a lot of self-hatred that turned into depression around 17 years of age. The full on breakdown I started at 19, when I went away to college just outside Chicago (I've lived here all my life, born and raised, attempted go to to school 3 HOURS OUTSIDE THE CITY). Long story short I came home in 2015, and was on and off depressed for the next four years. I started school again around 2017, but I had such an intense fear of school cause of my trauma, and a lot of my struggles have had to do with me being super duper hard on myself. Like the phrase "you are your worst enemy" describes my first 22 years of my life. I've been out of my depression for almost 3 years, I just finished my Bachelor's in hotel management, after not even thinking I would even be able to pass my classes to maintain a passing GPA. We are all on burnout mode.
Honestly, I watch you because we have the same attitude to life, and dark blonde shiny hair! 😂 We all have our own journey with mental health, and everything I see you do has my full support. 💟 People who have a diagnosis, are physically affected so differently. The most important thing, is learning how to be kind to ourselves and recognise we deserve a break. Break the spiral as soon as we feel it bringing us down. On those toughest of days I am learning to celebrate my little Victories. Give myself credit for getting out of bed, basic self care habits and eating. Never allowing that little snide voice of criticism to take the lead. For my personal hormone balance, I have to take antidepressants, my brain has no skill at regulating serotonin or dopamine. ADHD and womanhood flood my system, with more emotion bending hormones than should be there. Until I took medication I was never able to have a regular appetite or sleep schedule. The question, "What can I do to help you feel better?" the answer is fix my hormone imbalance. But how to do that? Is the secret to life itself. People need to stop asking those in mental distress to solve the human condition of existence! Why do we expect instant solutions to problems? What is wrong with us?.. We are only human. Don't question, be present and say: I am here, The rest will come.
I understand what you mean . I was diagnosed with severe depression when I was 18 and then at 30 I was diagnosed with PTSD and depression . Sometimes you know the triggers, sometimes it comes on suddenly . And I can't stand when people around me try to cheer me up by reminding me of all the good in my life. I know I've been blessed with a wonderful husband, family and friends but depression doesn't need a reason , just like my migraines lol . It's good to do the things that do bring a little joy in your life . I read . When I can't play with make up bc of my depression (which is usually a sign that I'm going into an episode), I read . And I'll read nonstop for weeks or even a month or two . I get off of socials during that time to reset . I'm almost 40 , I have a little better handle of myself but depression does still strike every once in awhile . Angie, we appreciate you and the content you bring . Hoping for a little brightness and cheer for you .
I'm sorry you've been down lately, Angie. You have a huge community of people here who appreciate and value you, and we are grateful that you're willing to open up and be vulnerable. While not chronic, I did have a period in my life where I was depressed for about a year and I can understand what you mean when you say that you feel hopeless, or like it's a waste of time to get out of bed. I hope that doing your eyeshadow cheered you up a bit; being creative can be a wonderful tonic!
My heart goes out to you and I can empathize with you. I truly admire your work ethic and overall positivity. As a fellow life-long mental health struggler, I send you hugs and all the best.
I rem when I was 15 I started seeing a psychiatrist she put me on Prozac…it of course made it worse. I stopped seeing her and taking the medication after it made me a zombie. And I know some people might not appreciate my opinion on depression, but I feel like it’s sort of a blessing sometimes, because I think it honestly just means we’re just more AWARE of the world and I’d rather be aware and feel sad than be in a happy mood all the time and oblivious of what is really going on inside of me. People say that I’m “just extra sensitive” and again I’d rather be extra sensitive than not care…because there have been times in my life where I felt like I didn’t feel anything and to me that felt way worse than being sad. People are always telling me don’t stress, don’t worry, as if it’s a button I can press at the back of my neck. I think people like you and me are the actual normal people. It’s the ones who are happy all the time are well…a little delusional and maybe they don’t really “check in” on themselves. Those are the people that are most likely to flip out because they just swallow every negative feeling and they hope that it just goes away. I hope if you read this, or if anyone does that suffers from depression, that you are not broken in any way. You are in fact completely intact and in touch w yourself on a level that most of the world can’t get to. They should be jealous of US. And they try to make us feel like there’s something wrong w us, when really it’s the other way around.
Girl, I feel you, I hope you feel better. Today I cried after I ate a delicious meal at a restaurant and then I cried again because of mushrooms and it's not because anything bad related with mushrooms happened. You know it's an emotionally unstable day if you're rating your day between "10" and "I cried because of mushrooms". Sending good vibes. Your makeup looks great! ❤
Orange 🧡 always cheers me up too! I had to tell my mom last week “if you break your ankle you go to the dr to have them fix it, and if your brain is broken sometimes you need to go to the dr to fix that too!” I know it isn’t as simple as just snapping out of it sometimes. Anytime you want to talk about it and film fun looks I am here for it and I’m sure many others are too! Sending lots of love 🧡 and healing vibes 🙏🏼
Thank you for posting this. I know it will help a lot of people to know that we all share so much of the same issues. I was diagnosed with depression at age 29 and I’ve been on a low-dose of anti-depressants ever since and now I’m 64. I literally don’t believe that I would still be here without them. I had tried everything including therapy, exercise, self-help books, support groups, church, and so on and so on and so on. I’m sure you’ll figure out how to get help so that you don’t have to go through this, Because it’s miserable and also can be life-threatening. Take care of yourself
It's hard to function with a chronic mental illness. I have OCPD and CPTSD. What's funny is your makeup videos have been inspiring me so much lately since makeup is a great way for me to disconnect and go to my happy place. I just ordered your Hela palette in fact. When I started wearing makeup, my abuser would always have something to say about it, "You're going out like THAT?" "Red lipstick is for whores." etc. I'd either wait until I was out of the house to put on makeup or play it safe with neutrals (nothing wrong with that of course). But two years away from him I'm starting to express myself more with colorful makeup; it's creativity, and everyone deserves to feel pretty in makeup. You're never too old to wear fun colorful makeup. I have so many doubts in my life and trust issues, but now using makeup isn't one of the things I dread doing anymore and you've helped me with that. Skål, Angie! 💖
I fully understand where you're coming from and thanks for being candid about this, we do need more people to talk about their mental health struggles to help remove the stigma. Your makeup turned out gorgeous and this was really comforting to watch and listen to
You look beautiful! I'm so sorry for anyone who said anything about how you look! Even on your off days, you radiate beauty and sunshine. You just might have some slight overcast, but it doesn't make you less beautiful, it makes you human. Please take care!
I have a personality disorder that mostly gives me anxiety and makes me really hard on myself and I think everybody hates me and everyone I love will leave me. I am doing fine most days, since I have had lots of therapy and have great supportive people in my life. I recently got diagnosed with endometriosis, nearly lost my dad, just lost my cat and got fired from my job because of too many sick days (from being in a world of pain all the time) and just learned that I can't have children (all in a 3 months span)... I mean.. I could use a win soon.. hasn't exactly been the summer I hoped for... yet I am so extremely proud and thankful of where I am today in my mental health journey, I honestly don't know how I haven't given up yet. But somehow I'm doing ok and I'm hopeful for the future. Don't know exactly where I am going with this comment and I know that it's probably nothing you haven't heard before and nothing anybody can say can change how you feel. But just know that your feelings are valid, you are loved, you are accomplished, you are strong and you are brave. Things may suck right now, and that's ok too. But I promise you there is so much love, laughter and joy waiting for you out there :) be kind to yourself, accept what you cannot change right now, and treat yourself the best you can :) this too shall pass :)
Angie… i hope you find This message. I know you have many. This video (and more like this, please) is so helpful to people like me. There are many of us who hardly leave the house because our depression prevents us from doing a lot. Videos like this where you share how you really feel speaks to people like me. I fight back tears every day despite medication. Most of us who are diagnosed with clinical depression had it since childhood. There are good days and bad ones, too. Its just very helpful to know we are not alone in our occasional sadness.
Thank you for sharing. So courageous!! I for one love you and follow you for the authenticity, warmth and pragmatism (and of course COLOR!!) you bring to the beauty community. You bring far more than IG-worthy moments and you avoid the manufactured drama - the junk food of social media. Bright lights cast shadows - but shadows change as the light moves. Be kind to yourself, be patient and with time and orange eyeshadow the shadows will move. I’ll be watching even if you work through the whole rainbow. 😘😘😘
Hi Angelica, what a beautiful video! I'm similar with on and off depression, so Hiiiii from a friend. It takes courage to talk about this online, and I want to congratulate you - maybe that's not the right word... I believe that putting these thoughts in words and sharing them can really help - like our brain is connecting dots as we tell our story, and I hope that it helps you as much as it will help others. I'm a decade older so sorry to say, it doesn't go away for me, but it becomes easier and softer and softer. Sending love xx
I'm sorry to hear that you've been struggling but grateful that you are open about brain health. I often struggle myself and watching your videos can be a bright spot for me on those days. While a single video ultimately can't change my feelings, it can at least make me feel more connected in that moment. I hope that we can make you feel a little more connected on your struggle days, too.
You did today one of the hardest things which is self compassion. You're doing something that makes you happy and said what this video is it is you didn't push yourself too far and that's so hard but it's amazing. Sending all the love and hugs
Angie…..You are the orange QUEEN……. I’m so pale with blue eyes. Orange does not look well on me. I think you look beautiful with makeup or not. Everyone has bad days. Just to let you know we are all right there with you. Let me tell you a true story. Ever since I found your channel about 8 months, I get up every morning and get my makeup out. I grab my coffee,and a Diet Coke. Then I grab my 2 Yorkies Oscar and Oliver. Then we watch Angie apply her makeup while I do mine. Oscar always try’s to lick my foundation off…You are a part of our life and you light up our day. I have serious health problems that I struggle with everyday. As Heather Austin always says”Makeup Makes Me Happy”. Isn’t that the truth my friend…ps I just ordered ND’s new collection as well. Give your puppies a hug for me……love ya…. Judy D
Sending metaphorical hugs, I don't know if you like hugs, to be fair a lot of people don't, but the thought of hugs can still be helpful. Disease is the correct term for Major Depression, as a health professional, that is definitely how we refer to it. I have a neurodegenerative disease and it plays havoc with every system in my body, including psych. It's a horrible feeling knowing that, for what of a better term, your thoughts aren't 'real', but ... they are real because you are experiencing them. You do an amazing job, I recognise that this is not what this is about, but you do do an amazing job.
I'm so sorry to hear about how rough things have been for you 💞 I totally understand feeling almost guilty, like you have nothing to be sad/upset about. I think context can be important when we're going through difficult things, but I also try to remind myself of something I heard once that was like 'you would never tell someone who had a good thing happen that they shouldn't be happy because others have it better - so why do we feel like we can't be struggling if others have it worse?' I'm still working on remembering that 😅 Sending love 💖💖💖 hope you take care of yourself as much as possible! I've been struggling a lot recently so I started going to counseling again and it has already made a huge difference (of course different solutions work for different people, it's just been really helping me)
Thank you so much for sharing this! I have struggled with anxiety for years, but did not know what it was until a few years ago, I’m 40. Having people talk about mental health helped me to identify my anxiety. I wish the US had better mental health help. Hope you get to feeling better soon. Sending you good vibes.
Medicine has only recently come to understand the brain and hormone interaction. We each have our own brain chemistry. Until people's differences are celebrated and supported by society, access to healthcare is hampered.
💗Much love, many hugs. I have no answers, but I so deeply understand. Another shitty club you wish you weren’t a member: The Depression Gang.🤦♀️ 💖I’m sending love 💗 I’ve had depression since I was a teenager & I’m 50 now and I still suffer. I’m in therapy, I’ve tried meds & cognitive behavioral therapy, but depression is still evil & hurty. A lyrical quote from one of my favorite bands, The Flaming Lips: “Will the fight for our sanity be the fight of our lives.” So true. Take all the time you need for YOU. You are so loved, and we all understand. Your honestly makes me feel so seen and understood. On the one hand, obviously I hate that you or anyone suffers, but, it does make you feel less alone when curling up under a weighted blanket and wrapping it sooo tight because everything hurts is just about all you can manage some days. I appreciate you sharing your struggle with us and I hope it’s as therapeutic for you as it is for us when we hear someone voicing the struggles many of us share with you as we’re also battling depression. ❤️❤️❤️
I can’t imagine anyone not liking you and/or wanting you to not succeed. You are so warm and pleasant to listen to. I turn to your videos when I need a pick-me-up. Your colorful looks are always happy and fun. Thank you for sharing yourself to all of us.
I don't comment very often, but I just wanted to say that I appreciate you sharing. Being vulnerable on the internet is very brave and I just wanted you to know that you are seen and appreciated. Sending lots of love from Los Angeles.
I hope you were able to get through and better. Orange makes you happy and I was happy to see you play with some in your collection. I'm inspired to look within my own collections and recreate this look. So many people are having these waves of depression and can relate to you. It's hard to explain to my loved ones why certain things can trigger a wave or why somedays I just want to stay home, sit with the dogs and watch HGTV, makeup videos, or crafting videos. I've watched you for years and love your authenticity, colorful looks, your love of fashion, your love of your husband, doggos and humor. You show your human side. No one should try to diagnose you or tell you what you should be doing. Judgy eyes should be poked with toothpicks. *makes me angry. sending many hugs. 🧡
I hope that talking about your struggles has lightened your heart a small amount. I can very much relate & I've been struggling greatly as of late. Thank you for sharing your vulnerabilities. As much as I hate knowing you are in a turbulent place, please know that every time we share, someone else may feel a lil less alone 🧡
Thank you for sharing all these emotions and ups and downs. I hope your sunny side will come back soon. You're a really talented person, kind human and you taught me a lot about make up, how fun it can be and the joy it can bring. Lots of love from France
Thank you for sharing this. As someone who has had anxiety their whole life and then PPD I can relate. I’m so sorry you’re going through this and I hope you can find some relief soon and feel more like you!
I know how you feel, I’ve struggled with depression for many years as well. It’s hard, and when people don’t understand and tell you you have no reason to be depressed, it’s even more depressing. You’re loved and I’m here for you if you need anything! ❤️🥰
I hate when people tell me I look unhappy or tired, it’s like oh thanks for pointing out something I already knew! Also have clinical depression but I have to say coming to your channel always brightens my day and makes me smile, you also inspire me to use more color in my makeup looks. You are beautiful Angie and I love you!!!
Talking about mental health is so important!! You're helping everyone by just being real and we all appreciate it, mental health IS a disease and should be treated like every other illness xxxx
I don't participate in social media precisely because the internet allows people to become the worst version of themselves. People as a species do kinda suck...but some individuals don't. You bring a bright, beautiful light to the world and I am so grateful for it.
Thank you for sharing Angie, hearing someone else talk about these things is so relatable. You articulated your feelings very well. Hope you start feeling better soon.
I’ve been following you for yrs almost right from the very start and I personally think you are one of the most real people in this community I can think of 3 other creators that I feel the same way about and you’re all great friends, I feel sad that you have to explain yourself because I also have depression and a slew of other health problems. I used to feel that I had to explain myself why I felt the way I did I thought I needed the vindication but I don’t, if I feel a certain way then that’s ok and I sure don’t need to explain myself just because you chose a job online sure as heck doesn’t mean you owe us an explanation for everything because you don’t. Take care of you be gentle with yourself and take it hr by hr if that’s what you need XO.
Im so glad you are brave enough to share your feelings with us and talk openly about your mental health. That’s very important. I’ve been diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder in 2017. And even though I made a huge progress since, I still have days off. You are a fighter. That’s one more reason to be proud of yourself. Sending a lot of love and hugs your way. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
No one can have a great day everyday. As long as you’re doing the best you can everyday everything works out fine. This is coming from someone diagnosed with clinical depression and autoimmune diseases that also cause depression. 💗
I'm sorry you're feeling down, thank you so much for sharing. More of us can relate than you may realize. The physical pain is so debilitating when your mental health is down. I fought with a coworker my last workday on Saturday and have to go back tonight, and it's giving me so much anxiety. The fight was trivial and was just all the problems my job had been having lately come to a head. My supervisor addressed the conflict right away, but I am still dreading dealing with everything still. It's been a hard couple years in my industry and it seems to just be getting worse. I'm at a loss for what to do or change. Sorry for the problem vomit, I just want you to know you're not alone. I'm going to take a cue from you and wear some cheery makeup tonight that makes me feel good. Feel better soon, and cuddle your pets, it's proven feel- good medicine. 🥰❤❤❤
Hi Angelica, thank you for sharing how you are feeling, i love your makeup,your eyeshadow gives me sunset vibes, the colours orange always makes me happy. Love Katherine xoxo
Orange and yellow are my "happy colors" as well. I'm currently on sick leave for depression/burnout so I can relate to what you're going through on some level. I'm wishing you the strength to get through this period I hope you find ways to be kind to yourself, whatever that means to you. I care about you as much as a parasocial, one sided relationship allows me to!
O R A N G E 💛🧡❤️🧡💛🧡❤️🧡💛 Anything I’ll say will be redundant so I’ll try to keep it short : I feel you. I’m more on the anxious side of things now, but I have been depressed and suicidal very early in life. I began to get better at 25, I’m pretty stable at 29 but I still get days/weeks that are just. No. The state the world is in… not helping 🤕 Being self employed is HARD, and you manage really well ! I know people who are physically unable to stop, they’ll say they’re taking a break and as soon as you leave the room they’re already back at it. It’s a rythm, keeping busy helps not to wallow, but it’s risky, I’m always scared they’ll crash. You’re doing A LOT for the channel and it’s perfectly understandable that sometimes it’s just too much. It’s very wise of you to recognise it and not push yourself to burnout. And yeah, frustration is tough, and having the world not playing by the rules when you do can feel very unfair. But all in all you manage !! It’s what counts. You can be proud of yourself. (Please be proud of yourself 🧡) And as you said : you’re doing your best. (And we can’t ask for more) (Oh my this was not short at all T-T)
I've dealt with depression since I was about 9 years old, I'm 28 now. This video really resonated with me because I often will do makeup to cheer myself up when my depression flares up. I'm so glad that you feel comfortable sharing your experience with us, and I really hope you feel like yourself again soon
Sometimes people don't want to be fixed, they just need to talk and feel supported. I've said it many times, people saying "you shouldn't be sad because so many people have it worse, is like saying you can't be happy because so many people have it better". You are allowed to feel how you do. We are hear to listen sweetie! 💕💕
Hi Angie, thanks for sharing how you’re feeling. Social media has produced such a drive for perfection that absolutely nobody can live up to. Sometimes anxiety/depression is a logical response to things happening around you. Letting people know you’re struggling is brave, responsible and intelligent.
I completely understand. I have those days where I don’t want to live and deep down I’m okay with dying. No reason, nothing going wrong in my life. Sending you so much love Angie ❤️ It’s okay to feel how you feel and take time for yourself. ❤️
I hope you feel better soon. It's ok to talk about the bad times as well as the good times, we all have them after all. I lost my dog and BFF three weeks ago, it has been a very sad time. My son is a great support and I return the favor when he feeling sad. The difficult times make us appreciate the good times even more. Big hugs from Canada
Thank you so much for talking about this Angie. I've been struggling really bad too for the last two-three weeks and im kindof the same where i don't really know what to do to make it better. I think we sometime just need to be kind to ourselves and allow ourselves to feel a certain kind of way for a while, to make room for better days. Thats all one can do i guess. I struggle with being my own biggest critique as well, i know how that feels. I hope we can both have some amazing weeks next to make up for the difficult times. Thanks for making this video again, it makes me feel like im not all alone
I applaud your bravery in sharing with us. But it always makes me sad when a creator has to make a disclaimer, in your case, no diagnosis please. I watched a creator yesterday who shared her summer wardrobe and someone commented “I say this with love but it would be a much better presentation if you ironed the linen pieces”. What? Why must people say unsolicited things? Anyways, I hope that the comments will be uplifting and supportive. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder since I was a teenager and quite frankly it just sucks. And it is such a struggle to climb your way out back to some kind of normalcy. But I think the best thing we can do is share our experiences openly. So many people keep quiet for fear of judgment. It is a disorder not a character flaw. You’re such a beautiful, intelligent, uplifting young woman and I’m sending you hugs.🤗💕
Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability. We all ride the struggle bus at times. What’s important is your ability to recognize it and how you handle it. Bravo for being your authentic self.
So sorry that you are sad.💗Hope the cloud has lifted and you are now having happier days. I have anxiety, and sometimes that has no rhyme or reason either. Take care. Love the orange 🧡 x
we love all facets of our beautiful Angie! ❤🧡💛 you're not alone in this at all. i've had physical and mental health problems for 15+ years and it's tough. i hid it too well at first and then nobody believed how BAD it was.
I've just yesterday seen a Sleek lipstick at store and I was like - oh this is an Angie shade. I was this beautiful vibrant pure orange - like from an orange juice commercial, like so warm and not white-based. I don't even like orange that much, as I am pale with blue undertone - like a snowman, kindoff 😁, so it's not my color but this one was so pretty, I think you kinda infected me, I may go back and buy it and wear it at home getting Angie vibes.
Dont feel bad for talking Angeshka ! If that is helping you we understand! Hope you will get better and have good day anyway! You look beautiful! If i have bad day or good day I hug my rescue animals and interact with them! They are my best therapy and loving part of my family! UNCONDITIONAL LOVE for them!
Sorry to hear you're going through it at the moment Angie. Although it might not be possible for you to believe me right now, just know that the majority of your followers here see you as a whole person. A person who is talented, strong, funny and yes, flawed - and we love you for that.
Honesty is the best policy Angelica. If only you knew the number of times I couldn't get out of bed, couldn't shower, and the only way I would manage after a few days was by watching your videos and finally getting inspired by your colorful soul and vibrant makeup.
Sometimes life turns in black and white for no reason but a chemical one. I hope you can ride this wave with kindness and gentle care. Warm hugs from Melbourne, Australia
What a lovely thing to say. Bright colour do give us joy and inspire us!
im not crying ur crying
yes your videos have made me stop thinking of my own crap and just numbed my mind to think of pretty fun things!
Such a thoughtful and kind comment. Helped me remember to be kind to myself, like I am with everyone else. Thanks
Doing my makeup was one of the first signs to myself that I was emerging from a deep depression. Little lovely things like makeup may seem silly to others but they keep us alive, keep us going. Thanks for this
Same here, but a little in reverse. If I not putting makeup on every day, it tells I am starting to slip and need to do the things that can help me. When I start getting excited to put it on again, like you, I know I am getting better. Its a comfort to me to understand my own signs and be able, in some small ways, to better manage my mental health. I am glad you can see them too
True! Makeup makes me feel confident and like I am doing something for myself!
As someone with chronic depression and multiple sclerosis, I feel you girl and appreciate you sharing! ❤
I'm diagnostic with cronical depression and anxiety. Your my favorite TH-camr, thank you so much for talk about this.
I jus wanna say that in my worst days, your videos make me smile, and thats a lot ❤️
OMG That feeling of never being done is why I went back to school to become a nurse when I was a photographer. I turned something creative and artistic into something I dreaded because I had to do it.
Yeeeeah that's why I didn't follow my artistic path. I didn't want to turn it into dreaded work. Took the science path and became a nurse haha. Art is MY time
You are me! I loved graphic design and now I can't even make myself turn on the computer. Considering my options right now. 💜💜💜
That is exactly why I haven't parlayed all my creative passions into a career, I don't want the pressure to rob me of the joy they give me. That goes for cooking, baking, dance, makeup artistry even. My job is a corporate job, 9 to 5pm. I get to have fun with my creativity in my evenings and weekends.
💕you are amazing. I experience the same mental health issues and totally understand!!!
I found the best way to describe clinical depression & anxiety to ppl is to explain its like the soundtrack to a movie that you have no way of changing. Except the movie is you’re life and you have no control over the music. Then I explain how you can see the opening of a movie with a little girl skipping down a sidewalk on a sunny day & if the music is upbeat or gentle, you know it’s a feel good family movie; but take that same scene and change the music to something dark & ominous, & suddenly you know the movie is dark &/or scary. Depression/anxiety is like that. Nothing is different about your life but evrything feels wrong. It’s like your life’s soundtrack has suddenly became dark, moody, scary, etc. It effects how you see and experience the world.
such a good explanation!
Mental Health, especially clinical depression is a Biatch!! I feel ya!! Keep taking care of yourself and take a win anywhere you can😊. You are on TH-cam talking about it today ..BIG WIN!!
You don't need to apologize, there are more of us who struggle with depression than you might think. I have been diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety, and PTSD, I see a counselor regularly, I take meds, and on really bad days I just sleep. Make up therapy is just as valid as art therapy in my mind. Ice cream helps too, at least it does for me.
I have had clinical depression. It has been so bad that I was hospitalized. It’s definitely a different kind of depression than what people say when they are just sad. It hurts to move. It hurts to think. It’s so impressive that you pushed yourself to do something to cheer yourself up because it isn’t easy when you feel that way. Keep talking to us. We like hearing your thoughts.
I’ve also been struggling with my depression lately… know you’re not alone. My therapist has been encouraging me to practice more self care and treating myself with kindness. Not a cure by any means, but it’s one small thing we can do. You’re beautiful, kind, and intelligent, and you will get through this. Talking about it helps, and thank you for being open and sharing with us.
To everyone out there who relates to this- just remember that all you can do is your best ❤️
Omg! I can’t believe people say “you look sad/you look depressed/you look tired”. I just want you to know that I watch ALOT of your videos, if not all of them, and I NEVER think you look like any of that. You look beautiful and vibrant and glowing every time I see you. Life really isn’t perfect. I can vouch for that haha 😳. And tbh your vulnerability in this video is just a breath of fresh air. Happy Wednesday! I hope today brings excitement and joy into your atmosphere and if it doesn’t that’s ok too. ♥️♥️♥️
Agree!
Yes a breath of fresh air for sure. The vulnerability and transparency is lovely.
It’s just as bad as when somebody says “you look good” to try to drum up some positivity for somebody that’s dealing with chronic illness and struggling through a tough time
@@SuperSarahbop Dang. Are you saying I just did that?
@kr911, you mean well, but when somebody is feeling really really unwell it’s a statement for you to feel better about them not doing good more than it is for them because when I feel bad and know I’m looking unwell it does not make me feel good to be told I look good because it’s not true
Fellow clinically depressed person , 👋🏻. I'm listening to you with love and support, Angie. Big hugs from California! (Also, thanks for the like yesterday on Instagram. I literally got giddy through a migraine and told all my family my favorite youtuber saw my post with her palette!)
I also struggle with depression and I feel guilty for not being happy. But then I remind myself depression is an illness not a feeling. I think people who have never experienced it have a difficult time understanding that. Sending you much love.
Angie - You're one of the most uplifting, inspiring content creators in the makeup community. I'm sorry you're struggling with your mental health. I really do hope things will get back on track for you, wishing you nothing but the best, good vibes and lots of love from Canada
As someone who's just getting back on her feet after a long depression and still have those days, I feel for you. I think we all can't understand to the full extent what the others is going through, even when we have the same diagnosis, but we can show empathy. I'm sorry you are going through this in general and I hope you will get better soon. The climate on social media is why I hide my makeup IG account (it's private, for me mostly) and never went for a YT account because I would have done it for fun and I don't have th energy to suffer through this when added to my actual job and life.
You are amazing, such a brilliant light in a space that isn't always pretty. Your intelligence, sense of humour, creativity and all around beautiful personality is such a nice presence to refer to everyday. When I need someone'S voice when I work home alone, when I need inspiration or whatever, I'm glad I can turn to you and your channel. 💜 get well soon
I love this look... orange is special to me because I am Indigenous and we wear orange on Sept 30th here in Canada to honor all the children who didn't survive Indian Residential School... I know this is a sad topic but for me I am proud I am here because I am a residential school survivor .. I am also a journalist and I have days when I feel the weight of the job and make up always makes me feel better 🥰🧡 thank you for sharing with us I feel honored to have shared this time with you
This is one of the best, least toxic TH-cam communities I have ever found, and probably of one of the safest places on the internet. 💜
Awh thank you! 😳❤
I totally feel you when it comes to the "I just wanna talk." and I'm happy you feel comfortable enough with your community and this channel to do so. I don't think this video was a downer. Sometimes it's really nice to just listen to other people talking about their thoughts and feelings. Esspecially if it makes you feel a bit better Videos don't always have to be positive. Life isn't eather. I wish you all the best and hope you will get some relief soon. Thank you for your videos and your honesty. We love you
Even without clinical depression, feelings can just be overwhelming. Everyone has their own perspective on things. Nobody should tell you how to feel or how to be. I commend you for living a life online, because that has to be difficult. Random people making judgements and comments that are either a snippet of you or not even real to begin with. You are allowed to FEEL! Give yourself as much grace as possible…even if it’s hard. I’ve never met you, but I think you are amazing. Sending lots of love ❤️
I feel you girl, depression doesn't need to have a reason, you just feel like sh*t and you don't necessarily know why, I was diagnosed with depression twice and I'm under medication for more than a year, it still sucks sometimes but doing much better most of the days... hope you find the help that you need to get back on your feet. Big kiss from Portugal.
Thank you for saying that about others diagnosing you. I don't need that or want that either. Sometimes it comes and there is no reason you can see or put your finger on. I understand because I have been dealing with depression for a long time. One thing that helped me was a therapist told me I am not my depression. So I try to separate it from who I am. Depression is something you can not just snap out of it. Those people don't understand. Sounds like you are taking care of yourself. Life is hard. You are amazing and thank you for your videos and you make me smile.
thank you
I have too 100 % agree with you ❤ i hope you feel better soon honey but please remember that you are amazing and that you deserve happiness and too feel like you are worth so much too your loved ones ❤ please stay strong my lovely 💟💟
P.s i know i am a complete stranger but i just thought I'd reply to your comment 😇😇
I'm glad when people show that not being okay is okay. And to do things that make you happy. Be supportive and be kind!🌻💙
17:12 When are struggling, we long for community, even though it might make us vulnerable to attack. Thank you for making this video, clinical depression is indeed a disorder, almost like an autoimmune disorder... It attacks our own brains and bodies even as we try to heal them, or if nothing is "really" wrong. It's a tough job, and I'm glad we have things to cheer us up and family + friends + professionals to support us. ❤️
Angie thank you for doing this video I have been diagnosed with clinical anxious depression since I was 13 years old, I am now 30. İt went and came on and off but for the past 5 years it is always on... I can't finish PhD thesis I can't do anything right but I am trying to live. I feel less alone when you speak about your mental health and this orange look is on fire I loved it. Thank you again for making me feel less alone ❤️🙏🏻
Mental health is never easy to talk about. Mainly because it's hard to understand. It never makes sense. And that'd frustrating in itself. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to open up and immediately shut down because trying to explain just feels more complicated. I know it probably doesn't mean much but your an amazing person to be able to do that. And I respect you soooo much more for this video. Your beautiful soul inside and out. One thing that always stuck with me is one breath at a time. One minute at a time. It's "easier" to exist
I don't know if you're reading this, and if it will mean something to you, but I've been watching your videos for at least 3 years and I'm looking for new content from you every day. What you do is meaningful and appreciated by many people, and I am one of them
As a self-employed person with major impostor syndrome & having had a full-on breakdown yesterday right in the middle of a severe depressive episode, watching this helped me beyond any words. Thank you so much for sharing your troubles as well as your wonderful talent. I think as your community, we understand what you're going through, and I for one in turn feel understood, which is so important when dealing with our issues. All the love and strength to you!
💙
I'm living with anxiety/depression I was born with, diagnosed, medicated and done therapy. It's just a core part of me. I feel your story deeply ❤️
1st: I love videos of you just doing an eyeshadow looks & talking. It’s like a tutorial to me.
2nd: Your not alone. I’m 52 and I had depression in waves for over 30 years starting when I was in preschool and would have feelings of terror attacks. Praise God I was able to finally find what works. A lot of us understand.
And lastly: Give yourself some understanding. You’re not only in a new country but you’re also in culture shock. You may be overwhelmed. Just keep reminding yourself it’s normal and it will soon get better. That helped me sometimes to tell myself “it’s going to be alright”. Because it eventually does.
Meanwhile I’ll pray you feel better sooner than later. 🙏 God bless you. 🤗
I am currently in DBT for severe depression and my anxiety and panic disorders. Don’t let anyone minimize what you go through! Many of us live with it every day. We really are the strong ones because we fight a silent battle almost constantly. 💪🏻
Angie, I understand in more ways I can count. I had severe social anxiety and a lot of self-hatred that turned into depression around 17 years of age. The full on breakdown I started at 19, when I went away to college just outside Chicago (I've lived here all my life, born and raised, attempted go to to school 3 HOURS OUTSIDE THE CITY). Long story short I came home in 2015, and was on and off depressed for the next four years. I started school again around 2017, but I had such an intense fear of school cause of my trauma, and a lot of my struggles have had to do with me being super duper hard on myself. Like the phrase "you are your worst enemy" describes my first 22 years of my life.
I've been out of my depression for almost 3 years, I just finished my Bachelor's in hotel management, after not even thinking I would even be able to pass my classes to maintain a passing GPA. We are all on burnout mode.
Honestly, I watch you because we have the same attitude to life, and dark blonde shiny hair! 😂
We all have our own journey with mental health, and everything I see you do has my full support. 💟 People who have a diagnosis, are physically affected so differently. The most important thing, is learning how to be kind to ourselves and recognise we deserve a break. Break the spiral as soon as we feel it bringing us down.
On those toughest of days I am learning to celebrate my little Victories. Give myself credit for getting out of bed, basic self care habits and eating. Never allowing that little snide voice of criticism to take the lead.
For my personal hormone balance, I have to take antidepressants, my brain has no skill at regulating serotonin or dopamine. ADHD and womanhood flood my system, with more emotion bending hormones than should be there. Until I took medication I was never able to have a regular appetite or sleep schedule.
The question, "What can I do to help you feel better?" the answer is fix my hormone imbalance. But how to do that? Is the secret to life itself.
People need to stop asking those in mental distress to solve the human condition of existence! Why do we expect instant solutions to problems? What is wrong with us?..
We are only human.
Don't question, be present and say:
I am here,
The rest will come.
I understand what you mean . I was diagnosed with severe depression when I was 18 and then at 30 I was diagnosed with PTSD and depression . Sometimes you know the triggers, sometimes it comes on suddenly . And I can't stand when people around me try to cheer me up by reminding me of all the good in my life. I know I've been blessed with a wonderful husband, family and friends but depression doesn't need a reason , just like my migraines lol . It's good to do the things that do bring a little joy in your life . I read . When I can't play with make up bc of my depression (which is usually a sign that I'm going into an episode), I read . And I'll read nonstop for weeks or even a month or two . I get off of socials during that time to reset . I'm almost 40 , I have a little better handle of myself but depression does still strike every once in awhile . Angie, we appreciate you and the content you bring . Hoping for a little brightness and cheer for you .
thank you for being so honest, I'm also feeling terrible atm and it is weirdly affirming and reassuring to hear someone speak so openly about it.
💜
I'm sorry you've been down lately, Angie. You have a huge community of people here who appreciate and value you, and we are grateful that you're willing to open up and be vulnerable. While not chronic, I did have a period in my life where I was depressed for about a year and I can understand what you mean when you say that you feel hopeless, or like it's a waste of time to get out of bed. I hope that doing your eyeshadow cheered you up a bit; being creative can be a wonderful tonic!
My heart goes out to you and I can empathize with you. I truly admire your work ethic and overall positivity. As a fellow life-long mental health struggler, I send you hugs and all the best.
I rem when I was 15 I started seeing a psychiatrist she put me on Prozac…it of course made it worse. I stopped seeing her and taking the medication after it made me a zombie. And I know some people might not appreciate my opinion on depression, but I feel like it’s sort of a blessing sometimes, because I think it honestly just means we’re just more AWARE of the world and I’d rather be aware and feel sad than be in a happy mood all the time and oblivious of what is really going on inside of me. People say that I’m “just extra sensitive” and again I’d rather be extra sensitive than not care…because there have been times in my life where I felt like I didn’t feel anything and to me that felt way worse than being sad. People are always telling me don’t stress, don’t worry, as if it’s a button I can press at the back of my neck. I think people like you and me are the actual normal people. It’s the ones who are happy all the time are well…a little delusional and maybe they don’t really “check in” on themselves. Those are the people that are most likely to flip out because they just swallow every negative feeling and they hope that it just goes away. I hope if you read this, or if anyone does that suffers from depression, that you are not broken in any way. You are in fact completely intact and in touch w yourself on a level that most of the world can’t get to. They should be jealous of US. And they try to make us feel like there’s something wrong w us, when really it’s the other way around.
I love you woman 💜
So sorry for my english, im latino learning english watching angy talk about makeup two hours a day 😂.
Those of us who are self employed can very much relate to the feeling of never ending work. Thank you for continuing to talk about mental health. 💛
Girl, I feel you, I hope you feel better. Today I cried after I ate a delicious meal at a restaurant and then I cried again because of mushrooms and it's not because anything bad related with mushrooms happened. You know it's an emotionally unstable day if you're rating your day between "10" and "I cried because of mushrooms". Sending good vibes. Your makeup looks great! ❤
Orange 🧡 always cheers me up too! I had to tell my mom last week “if you break your ankle you go to the dr to have them fix it, and if your brain is broken sometimes you need to go to the dr to fix that too!” I know it isn’t as simple as just snapping out of it sometimes. Anytime you want to talk about it and film fun looks I am here for it and I’m sure many others are too! Sending lots of love 🧡 and healing vibes 🙏🏼
That orange eye look is such a fantastic fall intro to color!!
Thank you for posting this. I know it will help a lot of people to know that we all share so much of the same issues. I was diagnosed with depression at age 29 and I’ve been on a low-dose of anti-depressants ever since and now I’m 64. I literally don’t believe that I would still be here without them. I had tried everything including therapy, exercise, self-help books, support groups, church, and so on and so on and so on. I’m sure you’ll figure out how to get help so that you don’t have to go through this, Because it’s miserable and also can be life-threatening. Take care of yourself
It's hard to function with a chronic mental illness. I have OCPD and CPTSD. What's funny is your makeup videos have been inspiring me so much lately since makeup is a great way for me to disconnect and go to my happy place. I just ordered your Hela palette in fact. When I started wearing makeup, my abuser would always have something to say about it, "You're going out like THAT?" "Red lipstick is for whores." etc. I'd either wait until I was out of the house to put on makeup or play it safe with neutrals (nothing wrong with that of course).
But two years away from him I'm starting to express myself more with colorful makeup; it's creativity, and everyone deserves to feel pretty in makeup. You're never too old to wear fun colorful makeup. I have so many doubts in my life and trust issues, but now using makeup isn't one of the things I dread doing anymore and you've helped me with that. Skål, Angie! 💖
I fully understand where you're coming from and thanks for being candid about this, we do need more people to talk about their mental health struggles to help remove the stigma. Your makeup turned out gorgeous and this was really comforting to watch and listen to
You look beautiful! I'm so sorry for anyone who said anything about how you look! Even on your off days, you radiate beauty and sunshine. You just might have some slight overcast, but it doesn't make you less beautiful, it makes you human. Please take care!
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable about your mental health!
I have a personality disorder that mostly gives me anxiety and makes me really hard on myself and I think everybody hates me and everyone I love will leave me. I am doing fine most days, since I have had lots of therapy and have great supportive people in my life. I recently got diagnosed with endometriosis, nearly lost my dad, just lost my cat and got fired from my job because of too many sick days (from being in a world of pain all the time) and just learned that I can't have children (all in a 3 months span)... I mean.. I could use a win soon.. hasn't exactly been the summer I hoped for... yet I am so extremely proud and thankful of where I am today in my mental health journey, I honestly don't know how I haven't given up yet. But somehow I'm doing ok and I'm hopeful for the future. Don't know exactly where I am going with this comment and I know that it's probably nothing you haven't heard before and nothing anybody can say can change how you feel. But just know that your feelings are valid, you are loved, you are accomplished, you are strong and you are brave. Things may suck right now, and that's ok too. But I promise you there is so much love, laughter and joy waiting for you out there :) be kind to yourself, accept what you cannot change right now, and treat yourself the best you can :) this too shall pass :)
Me too Angie, me too. Literally. This morning I sat at the vanity for a long time and did a matte orange look to cheer myself up.
Angie… i hope you find This message. I know you have many. This video (and more like this, please) is so helpful to people like me. There are many of us who hardly leave the house because our depression prevents us from doing a lot. Videos like this where you share how you really feel speaks to people like me. I fight back tears every day despite medication. Most of us who are diagnosed with clinical depression had it since childhood. There are good days and bad ones, too. Its just very helpful to know we are not alone in our occasional sadness.
💜
Very well said. Thank you.
That's a perfect combo of end of summer and beginning of autumn vibes. Beautiful.
Thank you for sharing. So courageous!! I for one love you and follow you for the authenticity, warmth and pragmatism (and of course COLOR!!) you bring to the beauty community. You bring far more than IG-worthy moments and you avoid the manufactured drama - the junk food of social media. Bright lights cast shadows - but shadows change as the light moves. Be kind to yourself, be patient and with time and orange eyeshadow the shadows will move. I’ll be watching even if you work through the whole rainbow. 😘😘😘
Hi Angelica, what a beautiful video! I'm similar with on and off depression, so Hiiiii from a friend. It takes courage to talk about this online, and I want to congratulate you - maybe that's not the right word... I believe that putting these thoughts in words and sharing them can really help - like our brain is connecting dots as we tell our story, and I hope that it helps you as much as it will help others. I'm a decade older so sorry to say, it doesn't go away for me, but it becomes easier and softer and softer. Sending love xx
I'm sorry to hear that you've been struggling but grateful that you are open about brain health. I often struggle myself and watching your videos can be a bright spot for me on those days. While a single video ultimately can't change my feelings, it can at least make me feel more connected in that moment. I hope that we can make you feel a little more connected on your struggle days, too.
You did today one of the hardest things which is self compassion. You're doing something that makes you happy and said what this video is it is you didn't push yourself too far and that's so hard but it's amazing. Sending all the love and hugs
Doing my makeup is always a good distraction from feeling anxious, Thank you for opening up x
Angie…..You are the orange QUEEN……. I’m so pale with blue eyes. Orange does not look well on me. I think you look beautiful with makeup or not. Everyone has bad days. Just to let you know we are all right there with you. Let me tell you a true story. Ever since I found your channel about 8 months, I get up every morning and get my makeup out. I grab my coffee,and a Diet Coke. Then I grab my 2 Yorkies Oscar and Oliver. Then we watch Angie apply her makeup while I do mine. Oscar always try’s to lick my foundation off…You are a part of our life and you light up our day. I have serious health problems that I struggle with everyday. As Heather Austin always says”Makeup Makes Me Happy”. Isn’t that the truth my friend…ps I just ordered ND’s new collection as well. Give your puppies a hug for me……love ya…. Judy D
Sending metaphorical hugs, I don't know if you like hugs, to be fair a lot of people don't, but the thought of hugs can still be helpful. Disease is the correct term for Major Depression, as a health professional, that is definitely how we refer to it. I have a neurodegenerative disease and it plays havoc with every system in my body, including psych. It's a horrible feeling knowing that, for what of a better term, your thoughts aren't 'real', but ... they are real because you are experiencing them. You do an amazing job, I recognise that this is not what this is about, but you do do an amazing job.
I'm so sorry to hear about how rough things have been for you 💞 I totally understand feeling almost guilty, like you have nothing to be sad/upset about. I think context can be important when we're going through difficult things, but I also try to remind myself of something I heard once that was like 'you would never tell someone who had a good thing happen that they shouldn't be happy because others have it better - so why do we feel like we can't be struggling if others have it worse?' I'm still working on remembering that 😅
Sending love 💖💖💖 hope you take care of yourself as much as possible! I've been struggling a lot recently so I started going to counseling again and it has already made a huge difference (of course different solutions work for different people, it's just been really helping me)
Thank you so much for sharing this! I have struggled with anxiety for years, but did not know what it was until a few years ago, I’m 40. Having people talk about mental health helped me to identify my anxiety. I wish the US had better mental health help. Hope you get to feeling better soon. Sending you good vibes.
Medicine has only recently come to understand the brain and hormone interaction.
We each have our own brain chemistry. Until people's differences are celebrated and supported by society, access to healthcare is hampered.
💗Much love, many hugs. I have no answers, but I so deeply understand. Another shitty club you wish you weren’t a member: The Depression Gang.🤦♀️
💖I’m sending love 💗 I’ve had depression since I was a teenager & I’m 50 now and I still suffer. I’m in therapy, I’ve tried meds & cognitive behavioral therapy, but depression is still evil & hurty. A lyrical quote from one of my favorite bands, The Flaming Lips: “Will the fight for our sanity be the fight of our lives.” So true.
Take all the time you need for YOU. You are so loved, and we all understand. Your honestly makes me feel so seen and understood. On the one hand, obviously I hate that you or anyone suffers, but, it does make you feel less alone when curling up under a weighted blanket and wrapping it sooo tight because everything hurts is just about all you can manage some days. I appreciate you sharing your struggle with us and I hope it’s as therapeutic for you as it is for us when we hear someone voicing the struggles many of us share with you as we’re also battling depression. ❤️❤️❤️
I can’t imagine anyone not liking you and/or wanting you to not succeed. You are so warm and pleasant to listen to. I turn to your videos when I need a pick-me-up. Your colorful looks are always happy and fun. Thank you for sharing yourself to all of us.
I don't comment very often, but I just wanted to say that I appreciate you sharing. Being vulnerable on the internet is very brave and I just wanted you to know that you are seen and appreciated. Sending lots of love from Los Angeles.
I hope you were able to get through and better. Orange makes you happy and I was happy to see you play with some in your collection. I'm inspired to look within my own collections and recreate this look. So many people are having these waves of depression and can relate to you. It's hard to explain to my loved ones why certain things can trigger a wave or why somedays I just want to stay home, sit with the dogs and watch HGTV, makeup videos, or crafting videos. I've watched you for years and love your authenticity, colorful looks, your love of fashion, your love of your husband, doggos and humor. You show your human side. No one should try to diagnose you or tell you what you should be doing. Judgy eyes should be poked with toothpicks. *makes me angry. sending many hugs. 🧡
I hope that talking about your struggles has lightened your heart a small amount. I can very much relate & I've been struggling greatly as of late. Thank you for sharing your vulnerabilities. As much as I hate knowing you are in a turbulent place, please know that every time we share, someone else may feel a lil less alone 🧡
Thank you for sharing all these emotions and ups and downs. I hope your sunny side will come back soon. You're a really talented person, kind human and you taught me a lot about make up, how fun it can be and the joy it can bring. Lots of love from France
Thank you for sharing this. As someone who has had anxiety their whole life and then PPD I can relate. I’m so sorry you’re going through this and I hope you can find some relief soon and feel more like you!
I know how you feel, I’ve struggled with depression for many years as well. It’s hard, and when people don’t understand and tell you you have no reason to be depressed, it’s even more depressing. You’re loved and I’m here for you if you need anything! ❤️🥰
I hate when people tell me I look unhappy or tired, it’s like oh thanks for pointing out something I already knew! Also have clinical depression but I have to say coming to your channel always brightens my day and makes me smile, you also inspire me to use more color in my makeup looks. You are beautiful Angie and I love you!!!
You bring so much joy to the world just being your beautiful self!!! Just know your not alone! 🧡🧡
Talking about mental health is so important!! You're helping everyone by just being real and we all appreciate it, mental health IS a disease and should be treated like every other illness xxxx
I don't participate in social media precisely because the internet allows people to become the worst version of themselves. People as a species do kinda suck...but some individuals don't. You bring a bright, beautiful light to the world and I am so grateful for it.
Thank you for sharing Angie, hearing someone else talk about these things is so relatable. You articulated your feelings very well. Hope you start feeling better soon.
Sending happy positive vibes your way. Fellow depression woman here - it sucks. Thank you for opening up ❤
I’ve been following you for yrs almost right from the very start and I personally think you are one of the most real people in this community I can think of 3 other creators that I feel the same way about and you’re all great friends, I feel sad that you have to explain yourself because I also have depression and a slew of other health problems. I used to feel that I had to explain myself why I felt the way I did I thought I needed the vindication but I don’t, if I feel a certain way then that’s ok and I sure don’t need to explain myself just because you chose a job online sure as heck doesn’t mean you owe us an explanation for everything because you don’t. Take care of you be gentle with yourself and take it hr by hr if that’s what you need XO.
You are a queen of orange makeup, Angie 🧡🧡🧡 I know how you feel, sending you internet hug
Im so glad you are brave enough to share your feelings with us and talk openly about your mental health. That’s very important. I’ve been diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder in 2017. And even though I made a huge progress since, I still have days off. You are a fighter. That’s one more reason to be proud of yourself. Sending a lot of love and hugs your way. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
No one can have a great day everyday. As long as you’re doing the best you can everyday everything works out fine. This is coming from someone diagnosed with clinical depression and autoimmune diseases that also cause depression. 💗
I'm sorry you're feeling down, thank you so much for sharing. More of us can relate than you may realize. The physical pain is so debilitating when your mental health is down. I fought with a coworker my last workday on Saturday and have to go back tonight, and it's giving me so much anxiety. The fight was trivial and was just all the problems my job had been having lately come to a head. My supervisor addressed the conflict right away, but I am still dreading dealing with everything still. It's been a hard couple years in my industry and it seems to just be getting worse. I'm at a loss for what to do or change. Sorry for the problem vomit, I just want you to know you're not alone. I'm going to take a cue from you and wear some cheery makeup tonight that makes me feel good. Feel better soon, and cuddle your pets, it's proven feel- good medicine. 🥰❤❤❤
I hope work goes much better tonight
Hi Angelica, thank you for sharing how you are feeling, i love your makeup,your eyeshadow gives me sunset vibes, the colours orange always makes me happy. Love Katherine xoxo
Orange and yellow are my "happy colors" as well. I'm currently on sick leave for depression/burnout so I can relate to what you're going through on some level. I'm wishing you the strength to get through this period I hope you find ways to be kind to yourself, whatever that means to you. I care about you as much as a parasocial, one sided relationship allows me to!
Hope life feels lighter soon
Thanks Angie for being you and sharing yourself with all of your fans.
Orange makes me happy also!
O R A N G E 💛🧡❤️🧡💛🧡❤️🧡💛
Anything I’ll say will be redundant so I’ll try to keep it short : I feel you.
I’m more on the anxious side of things now, but I have been depressed and suicidal very early in life. I began to get better at 25, I’m pretty stable at 29 but I still get days/weeks that are just. No. The state the world is in… not helping 🤕
Being self employed is HARD, and you manage really well !
I know people who are physically unable to stop, they’ll say they’re taking a break and as soon as you leave the room they’re already back at it. It’s a rythm, keeping busy helps not to wallow, but it’s risky, I’m always scared they’ll crash.
You’re doing A LOT for the channel and it’s perfectly understandable that sometimes it’s just too much. It’s very wise of you to recognise it and not push yourself to burnout.
And yeah, frustration is tough, and having the world not playing by the rules when you do can feel very unfair.
But all in all you manage !! It’s what counts. You can be proud of yourself. (Please be proud of yourself 🧡)
And as you said : you’re doing your best. (And we can’t ask for more)
(Oh my this was not short at all T-T)
I've dealt with depression since I was about 9 years old, I'm 28 now. This video really resonated with me because I often will do makeup to cheer myself up when my depression flares up. I'm so glad that you feel comfortable sharing your experience with us, and I really hope you feel like yourself again soon
Sometimes people don't want to be fixed, they just need to talk and feel supported. I've said it many times, people saying "you shouldn't be sad because so many people have it worse, is like saying you can't be happy because so many people have it better". You are allowed to feel how you do. We are hear to listen sweetie! 💕💕
Hi Angie, thanks for sharing how you’re feeling. Social media has produced such a drive for perfection that absolutely nobody can live up to. Sometimes anxiety/depression is a logical response to things happening around you. Letting people know you’re struggling is brave, responsible and intelligent.
I completely understand. I have those days where I don’t want to live and deep down I’m okay with dying. No reason, nothing going wrong in my life. Sending you so much love Angie ❤️ It’s okay to feel how you feel and take time for yourself. ❤️
I hope you feel better soon. It's ok to talk about the bad times as well as the good times, we all have them after all. I lost my dog and BFF three weeks ago, it has been a very sad time. My son is a great support and I return the favor when he feeling sad. The difficult times make us appreciate the good times even more. Big hugs from Canada
Thanks for sharing. Depression is tough and not a lot of people understand so you opening up is appreciated.
Thank you so much for talking about this Angie. I've been struggling really bad too for the last two-three weeks and im kindof the same where i don't really know what to do to make it better. I think we sometime just need to be kind to ourselves and allow ourselves to feel a certain kind of way for a while, to make room for better days. Thats all one can do i guess. I struggle with being my own biggest critique as well, i know how that feels. I hope we can both have some amazing weeks next to make up for the difficult times. Thanks for making this video again, it makes me feel like im not all alone
I applaud your bravery in sharing with us. But it always makes me sad when a creator has to make a disclaimer, in your case, no diagnosis please. I watched a creator yesterday who shared her summer wardrobe and someone commented “I say this with love but it would be a much better presentation if you ironed the linen pieces”. What? Why must people say unsolicited things? Anyways, I hope that the comments will be uplifting and supportive. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder since I was a teenager and quite frankly it just sucks. And it is such a struggle to climb your way out back to some kind of normalcy. But I think the best thing we can do is share our experiences openly. So many people keep quiet for fear of judgment. It is a disorder not a character flaw. You’re such a beautiful, intelligent, uplifting young woman and I’m sending you hugs.🤗💕
Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability. We all ride the struggle bus at times. What’s important is your ability to recognize it and how you handle it. Bravo for being your authentic self.
When you said " I don't know what's missing, I don't know what I need", I felt that deep.
So sorry that you are sad.💗Hope the cloud has lifted and you are now having happier days. I have anxiety, and sometimes that has no rhyme or reason either. Take care. Love the orange 🧡 x
we love all facets of our beautiful Angie! ❤🧡💛
you're not alone in this at all. i've had physical and mental health problems for 15+ years and it's tough. i hid it too well at first and then nobody believed how BAD it was.
I've just yesterday seen a Sleek lipstick at store and I was like - oh this is an Angie shade. I was this beautiful vibrant pure orange - like from an orange juice commercial, like so warm and not white-based. I don't even like orange that much, as I am pale with blue undertone - like a snowman, kindoff 😁, so it's not my color but this one was so pretty, I think you kinda infected me, I may go back and buy it and wear it at home getting Angie vibes.
Dont feel bad for talking Angeshka ! If that is helping you we understand! Hope you will get better and have good day anyway! You look beautiful! If i have bad day or good day I hug my rescue animals and interact with them! They are my best therapy and loving part of my family! UNCONDITIONAL LOVE for them!