Your College Degree Is Probably Useless. Dry Bar Comedy
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 พ.ค. 2024
- Your college degree is probably useless, and take it from the folks at Dry Bar Comedy, they have a lot of experience with useless degrees. Whether you're someone who majored in english, or one of a thousand useless degrees this Dry Bar Comedy compilation is sure to make you question your educational choices while keeping you laughing along the way.
Comedians featured in this compilation include:
Dave Dyer, Chris Strait, Tyler Boeh, Rodney Norman, Dylan Mandlsohn, Michael Palascak, Mary Mack, John Deming, Helene Angley, Don Friesen, Andrew Hobbs, Dave Burleigh, Andy Beningo, Jamie Lissow, Drew Allen, Jason Love, Kim Kerley, Alex Velluto, Tony Deyo.
Check out some of our other compilations
Online Dating Compilation
• Online Dating Can Be B...
Prank Compilation
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#drybar #comedy #standup - ตลก
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my stepson got a masters in art he can draw everything but a pay check
James Samuel's,
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Ba dum bump
Love it
Take the drawings and make an ETSY account
you need to teach him or tell him to learn service business. Use his talent and skill as a service. 25 buck a pieces, make money while creating portfolio.
I have a philosophy degree and it's far from useless. I not only know why they want fries, but I can explain to them why their reasons for wanting fries are bad ones, and I can persuade them to get onion rings instead.
😂😂😂😂
Love this 💕
Lol
You are funny...greetings from South Africa
But can you block?
When my son was about to graduate high school, one of his friends told me he was going to college to major in history. I said, "History? There's no future in that..."
Nice 😂
Rip boom...
ironically ironically right
Especially since they are trying to do away with all history.
Badum tssshhh
All those "none of the big history factories were hiring" Love it!! So true.
Nor were the psychology factories! ;)
Ya I howled at that one too
Like Vatican 😂😂👍🤦
No vacancys at United History Co. Try again in the past, hee hee.
That jokes old its history!
"Don't take revenge in a way that ruins _your_ life."
Okay. That's some sage advice, right there.
Huh? You need people to tell you that, all I can say is good luck.
At that point it’s vengeance.
@@joshuamohr2510 hi
@@joeyantolino4671 hi
Try the basil advice. It's basilic hee hee.
I approached college "backwards"-worked in a field for a decade then got a degree to "prove" I knew what I had been doing. Never found it challenging this way-just an expensive book club.
The guy who knows what he's doing! Pleasure to meet you. College must have been a breeze.
@@NameCallingIsWeak Actually it was-got three degrees and now teach at University. Got a Business degree after 20 years of working and management, got a Masters in Education after designing and implementing an entire Montessori High School curriculum, and a Masters in Psychology after 25 years of mentored work on exploring consciousness. Never found it challenging or "hard" this way. Now I am discovering how "dumbed down" the younger generations are and it is frightening. Should have the smartest generation with access to Digital Information-but instead the opposite has occurred. :)
@@dariushober1506 If I ever confront a school board, I will confront them on dumbing down. It's evil.
@@dariushober1506 u were refering to which generation?
@@randydandy7526 Hey Randy-from my perspective and being 60 years old and a teacher, I consider the "younger" generation from an educational position those born from around 2000. I consider my generation to be "Analog" and the younger to be "Digital". With my Psychology background, I realize a big difference. The Digital Era generation are "wired" completely different. Simple example is with cars-I grew up actually modifying cars, drag racing in the streets, and doing my own mechanical repairs and upkeep. I quit working on cars in the 80s when computers and chips were added into the mix. Required a new skillset I did not care to invest in. When I went in the Navy in 1980, I drove a 1939 Chevy Sedan Deluxe with an inline 6-cylinder, oil bath air-filter, 3-speed on the column, and king pins instead of power steering. You probably will not have teenagers "rebuilding" a 2020 car in the year 2080. Times are different and technology is changing exponentially faster.
With the Digital Era is a major problem with information over load. Far too much for our feeble minds to truly process completely. Our focus then for learning needs to shift to Emotional Intelligence since it is emotions that are the primary driver. As a teacher, I saw this plainly and my Master Thesis in 2015 was titled "Responsibility for Thought and Feeling". Hope this answer helps you! Have a Great Day!
"you think I'm telling my daughter to stay in school, I'm telling her Chinese guys are hot!" 🤣
Funny yet frightening at the same time.
You gotta do what you gotta do to survive in this world
Invent the next Covid-19.....except this time, release it in China and close the borders before they can leave and infect the world again.
What’s that even mean?
@@Uns46 been a while since I watch it, but probably means Asians are more successful on average, have more money etc
The only thing my Associate Degree in Graphic Design ever did for me was make me almost totally immune to subliminal advertising.
That sounds like the effort was worth it.
That pays for itself!
Almost
@Jessica B. I'm certain they do and are, I'm just not one of them unfortunately.
@@Scavenger82 do something with it; create a series of your own designs and start showing them. Don't give up.
Well, my grandson is going to the university now… he’s going to be an astronaut….
Yeah… he’s goes to class every day and he is just taking up space.
Is he a bit of a space cadet? :D
🤣🤣🤣
Spends his days looking into space....
This isn't comedy... this is wisdom!
It's fun because it's true..
Comedy often is
It's stupid -_-
@@comochinganconesto and yet here you are 💁🏻♀️
What's the difference?
My daughter was holding up her Master's Degree certificate. It was huge and all done in calligraphy. As I filmed her I noticed they had spelled her name wrong. I just quietly said, 'They spelled your name wrong.' She just looked at me and then smiled and told me I was kidding. When I didn't respond she frantically checked out the certificate and just melted. $100,000 and they got her name wrong.
It does not matter. They have the money. Your name, meh.
Thank you for the money now out the door.
Just make sure the accredited school has attributed that certificate to the correct student ID. The certificate is still valid. Information is written down by humans, input into computers by humans, read by humans, written by humans, humans with lives, you havent the slightest idea what happened at the moment that certificate was written. No you do not in a position to say that specific certificate is more or less important than any other. Otherwise any other parent can make the same claim thus the point becomes moot. Call the school, make sure the accreditation to your daughter is valid, then motherfucker them into sending you a corrected set of certificates as it is reasonably assumed the cost of the education includes a correct original certificate and not a shitty reprint (and yes, you will probably have to wait until next graduation when they send out the orders to whatever company produced those pieces of paper). IF by some chance she is not properly accredited, inform the school both you and them have records of your daughter attending and receiving credits to achieve that certificate, and either the ball gets rolling on fixing this now or the next call will be to the family lawyer to address this 'slam dunk' case of fraud by a (hopefully) state accredited university.
the types of people that answered above who just spread shade and roll over are why the places that get away with things like that exist. Stand for something or fall for anything, die on your feet or live on your knees(with a misspelled certificate), your choice.
Heres hoping that $100,000 was spent on a marketable job skill and you didnt just send her to a 4 year art camp......
Yikes…maybe her melting down during such an important milestone in her own life could have waited a few min. But what’s another 10K in therapy and counseling.
Praise Yahovah for freedom in His instructions.
As a good friend told me: "My job is not my dream job but it allows me to do the things I dream of."
Stephen He has a skit about his dad saying you a job you hate for the money and then afford to do the things you love. (Something like that). Meant to be Dunbar but resonated with me.
I have a degree in structural welding and secondary in teaching. Two people I work with have bachelor's degrees in computer science, and one more has a degree in engineering.
We are vendors at Walmart...
@Muad'Dib nope. Because we're young and don't have 10+ years of experience, we don't qualify for our degree positions. And I just wanted basic entry level...
But, I'm okay with that. I make just as much to do way easier tasks
Reagan's America. It took a while but here we are ..
Get your PADI. That's where the welding money is.
“We all got Masters degrees and we are comedians” Ain’t that the truth!
Masters degree over here. TH-camr😓
@Jorge Pastor dios Nicolás Maduro Moro Aleluya Amén dude you’re looney tunes.
Jesus said, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but through me.’” -John 14:6
Come to Christ and be saved.
@Jorge Pastor dios Nicolás Maduro Moro Aleluya Amén I pray that you repent. The Lord God will share glory with no man. Mr Moor will die but The Lord is eternal. The Lord wills that none perish but wanting all to come to repence (2 Pet 3:9) therefore repent of your blasphemy, elevating a man to a station only for the Lord.
@Jorge Pastor dios Nicolás Maduro Moro Aleluya Amén I encourage you to walk your talk and remember only God can judge.
Because it’s “funny” how
Hard it is to get a job 🧐🤓🤗
My degree was in aviation.
I charge forklift batteries for a living and I’m making more money doing that than flying airplanes
Something is wrong with that.
😳😲🤯
What’s that job title so I can see if my area is hiring lol
If you are making more money charging forklift batteries, then take the money and be grateful...the pilots are chumps to accept less...
Yeah but if your flying can't you put it on auto-pilot...?
@@aoeu256 please tell me that's not a serious question...
“Just so they can know WHY they want some fries with that” 😂
it's like majoring in welfare. . .
Boomer humor, but still plays...
I’m dying’ 😂🤣😂
@Muad'Dib
I have a Psych degree & know that is true!
Philosophy is pre-law. A tiny number of grads go on to PhDs, if they already know they can write a book based on their thesis. Otherwise, there's no sense in it. In Europe they won't admit you to a doctorate in philosophy without a thesis proposal.
The best comedians are very bright and insightful people. They see the truth hidden in complexity.
Or they get high and start pontificating.
Seen this video, and... maybe you can recommend one.
@@FuckFeminists
I was going to comment, "None of these should quit their day job".
I was ready for a good laugh.....I never even smiled. Can I have back my time?
@@RalphSampson... Alex Velluto was aweeesome! He should not quit his day job though, he needs it to get inspiration for jokes we office people can relate to!
Truth!
"All things were made by him; and without him was not anything made that was made." John 1:3.
The him is Jesus, the Word made flesh. John 1:14.
What is the dictionary word for God? Supreme Being, Creator.
John 1:3 cleary states that Jesus is uncreated and the Creator.
Jesus' first end times warning is, "And Jesus answered and said unto them, Take heed that no man deceive you.
For many shall come in my name, saying, I am the Christ, and shall deceive many." Matthew 24:4-5.
"But though we or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed." Galatians 1:8.
Jesus said that he is God!
"Before Abraham was, I am." John 8:58, Exodus 3:14.
The corrupt Jews wanted to stone Jesus because He called God His Father, making himself to be God. John 10:33.
"For the Father loveth you because ye have loved me and believe that I came out from God." John 16:27.
Jesus forgave sins.Mark2:10-12.[Only God can forgive sins].
He knew His Father as His Father knew Him. John 10:15. [Only God can know as God knows.]
"Destroy this temple and in three days I will raise it up." [Jesus spoke of His body] John 2:18-22.
Jesus stated He is omnipresent, a quality of God alone. Matthew 18:20. "Where two or three are gathered in my name, I am in the midst of them."
"I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the ending, saith the Lord, which is, and which was and which is to come, the Almighty."
Revelation 1:8. Know also, Jesus is fully man. Hebrews 3:3, 7:24, 8:3, and 10:12. King James Bible. He called us brethren. He became our high priest. Hebrews 10!
'Oh the blood of Jesus, oh the blood of Jesus, it washes white as snow.'
The Professor on Giligans Island could make a radio out of a coconut but couldn’t fix the hole in the boat lol
Right? And they always had visitors to the Island but could never figure out how to get off the Island. I mean it was only a 3 hour tour.
As a small child I would rant and rave that Gilligan had to be taken out if there was any hope of getting off the island
On a tropical island with Mary Ann? Why the hell would he fix the boat? He was a professor, not a gay.
It takes different materials.
Never once did he make a radio out of a coconut. They brought a radio with them. They did once turn Gilligan into a radio once in an absurd episode.
I came home with a degree in Political Science, my dad says; “Great, you have a BA in BS”. NAVY Chiefs are funny.
You think he's funny... I think he's an idiot lol
Clearly only someone who had a chief for a dad, could understand!
Better than a Masters in disasters, hee hee.
@@lightbulb1982 ii
🤣🤣🤣
My grandfather told me if you get a degree in philosophy you're going to just sit around and think about why you don't have a job. If you get a degree in theology you're going to just sit around and pray about why you don't have a job.
And you get a degree in gender studies and you finally realize you dont have a job because of straight white hetero normative males. And you probably find out that you are actually a xee gender who identifies as an atheistic Muslim on an invisible wheelchair.
@@Landstalker1999 I wish you were joking
I have a degree in theology. Moved on to anesthesia. It pays much better than sitting around, praying for a job. Kentucky
Fact: while true, both of these majors have the highest percentage of acceptance into medical school. Why? Few people can handle Philosophy rigor in addition to science course success.
Well, there aren't 'Philosophy jobs' so to speak. You don't get a Philosophy degree to get hired, you get it so that you know enough to write a book. You can't just sit around thinking, you either need to write an interesting book, or go oldschool: hang around in public, challenging people's ideas about how the world works.
2:20 "I'm telling her Chinese guys are hot"
Underrated joke 😂🤣🤣
I do not get this joke.
And a bit scary as well.
He's implying that China will likely be taking over etc.
I have a degree in civil engineering. I got it in 1996. It's been very useful and profitable. I'll say this much though...college was full of useless stuff back then too.
Totally depends on the major. Anything in STEM or engineering will be extremely useful and applicable in the real world but a genders studies or history degree, unfortunately, don't cut it.
Eh no, nothing unfortunate about how useless "gender studies" are.
I got my Bachelor's in Education in 1979 and was able to find jobs that eventually led me to getting a second degree in Sign Language Interpreting in 1988. I guess it all depends on the Degree you choose to get. Before you could get a degree and bend it to fit a job, now that wiggle room is gone.
@@seanA416 Well Said 👏👏💯
@@seanA416 but if you are STEM or engineer professional with mental health issues you can't make money. That's why psychologists, psychiatrists, and mental health professionals exist.
@@p.g.2035 oh absolutely!
I love these compilations about the same topic. Hilarious 10/10 😂
You're a 10/10
@@silo3com 5/10
@@martinenriquez3508 2.5/10
I used my bachelor's in English to mix concrete, deliver produce, and pound nails. Now I'm retired.
I used my associates degree in fisheries technology and my bachelors in biology to work as a corrections officer at a county jail. Wrong kind of animal haha. Happily retired too.
The best is when someone gets a job in their major after spending 4-6 years in college and it pays a few dollars an hour more than McDonald’s
There are McDonald’s locations paying $20/hour. Unless one goes for STEM they are wasting their time in college.
@@srs3572 yeah it’s crazy I believe out in Hawaii all minimum wage is right at if not higher than $20 an hour considering everything is so expensive there lol
That was like my sister. She attained a kinesiology degree and wanted some experience in the field before considering pursuing a masters. She was paid only $1 more an hour than minimum wage as a "physiotherapy assistant". She went back to operating equipment for a construction company with better pay and overall compensation package.
And being left with a debt you have no hope of ever paying off.
a PhD in medicine. Never got the 40 hrs/wk or steady wk across the US. topped out at $24/hr as expert in Neuro rehab. Every yr on unemp hit total income w work & unemp @$22-24k.
our techs, also CNAs ("nursing") no formal ed beyond high school, got $15.00/hr and as much as 80 hrs/wk, overtime 1 1/2x over 40 hrs.
our CNAs, mostly foreign, bought houses in the States and in their countries, ended up renting out houses here and went home to live, as retirees on investment income after several yrs work.
that's life.😲
"you wanna get a philosophy degree so you can know why they want fries with that?" 😂😂
When I went to college back in the 1990's, I took a philosophy course in "Introduction in Logic" in order to satisfy one of my gen ed requirements. My teacher was an adjunct professor who also worked as a waiter for a hotel restaurant. Or maybe he taught on the side to supplement his income when he wasn't waiting tables? 🤣
Comedy really does shine a light on society
What makes these clips so hilarious is that it is 100% true. I'm not sure what colleges are teaching these days but it should be common sense
A lot of what colleges teach is against common sense.
If they thought common sense w
E wouldn't be having covid lockdown nonsense
Nope, you can get a music degree. They teach you 0 you actually USE. And some grads still SUCK at playing.
But wait: there's more! The requirements for drums include: xylophone, marimba and timpani. None of which anyone has and 0 of which we've been able to play at school since 2019.
College teaches that feelings are facts and reality is only what you are comfortable with.
This is why minority parents laugh when we tell them we want to do something we love. They say do something that pays and do what you love as a hobby.
I have waited plenty of tables and substitute taught often to float my artsy farsty projects and to pay for my college education. I think I should have gotten a CPA license, too. I may still go for a real estate license. College is just a license to learn, IMO. Most real knowledge and skills sets are learned on the job.
Too bad they don't follow your advice. The facts show the complete opposite.
The most fortunate of us, get to do what we love, and pays. Kenny Roger's said "Love what you do, you'll never work a day in your life."
@@Iowagrown123 Born lucky is not a job strategy.
Not just minority parents. All kinds of parents have been saying that for many generations.
"Why don't we just go ahead and play hangman" 🤣🤣🤣 Exactly...I was thinking, "Is that statement true?" Lol
What he said is pretty much true but we all have our own opinions
The guy with the charts killed it, he also earned the like for this vid
Yep, the pac-man paradox killed me
I didn't like him at first but he grew on me. I'll chart it later.
I wanted to study English literature but parents and I thought that I should first study accounting seeing as I had a full scholarship for that. This satisfies my soul because I am not funny.
Full scholarships sound great for those that get them.
That's funny
You probably did the right thing. I majored in English Lit with a minor in Philosophy, and I've worked primarily as a waiter my whole life. I've also worked in hotels and warehouses and as security. I've never been hired due to my degree. I don't completely regret taking the courses and seminars I took, but looking back, with a little guidance, I should have majored in something more practical. I didn't think of college as a means to employment, but rather, a bit too idealistically, as a continuing education of my mind and spirit.
You can read anything you want on your own time for a lot less money.
I have an English degree, long since paid off, but I'm thinking of an MBA through a local college that offers it for under 10 grand. Idk but I haven't made a lot of money with my English degree, although it has kept me employed.
@@bschuler6216 and that is why I never pursued my master's in English. A BA, ok, but to do that would require time and money I don't have. It's a rich person's leisure to do that for the sake of the degree, is my thought.
"you think im telling her to stay in school? im telling her chinese guys are hot" lol
Lol
I loved this!!!
My advice: Before you pick a major. Open up a job board like zip recruiter or indeed. Start scrolling through the list of jobs and see what degrees employers are asking for. You’ll have a better idea of which degrees are worth more than the paper they are printed on. Or better yet, filter by salary and look at good paying jobs and what degrees are required.
Want a future in Information Technology? Graduate HS, the take IT classes one or two at a time from Community College and take the certification exam they teach to instead of the final exam offered in the class. Do that for a couple years until you understand stuff. Get IT work from there, make 80-150k/yr inside 5 years depending on aptitude.
Nobody worth working for in IT cares about your Bachelor degree.
@@TheJBerg Get the book, read it and test out.
Isn't it a bit weird to give such Sage advice at a time when computers are available and such things as the internet? Consider that no such animals were in existence in the 50s 60s 70s or 80s to utilize
@@TheJBerg That is so true. CISCO certifications were more valuable than an IT degree
Yeah.. sounds like a good idea… except my daughter graduated with a BA Math/Economics dual major… and now she decides she wants to teach.
I praise GOD for each and every one of you in Dry Bar Comedy.
From the greatest to the least.
You are such a wonderful blessing!
Laughter.
Lovely.
Truly, lovely.
If you want that to sound like a true compliment and a way of expressing your gratitude, take the second line out, never compare or classify people during a praise, ever
College is a money making scheme for the institution. It only works out for 20% of the graduates. My son just paid off his math degree student loans by being a machinist at the age of 50.
If your son got a degree in a STEM field and never used it; that's his own fault. There is a shortage, if anything, of STEM majors.
Average students that I know, 6 years out, are making 6 figures doing something they love. That's not the norm for all fields within STEM but, generally speaking, STEM pays.
I went to college for 1 year and said screw that and went into factory work where at full rate moving up can make more than most jobs and not have to pay an arm and a leg for college. Luckily I paid for my first year in cash since I started working super young.
@@Sam21998 Same story here. I went back for specific subjects to help me or a class that held my interest. Never put together a degree. My poor son kept changing majors until he had invested 165 hours to get a 120 hour bachelor's degree in math.
@@burtvincent1278 wow that's insane I'm sorry to hear that, I went for criminal justice, I hated i needed to take math for it but really enjoyed criminal law, criminology and psychology, and absolutely hated sociology I had to take.
I felt personally attacked when he said "get drunk and watch Ted talks"
But if you haven't tried it... Boy oh boy....I never thought it was possible to get dumb and smart at the same time
If u felt attacked u kno comedy ain’t for u
John Gramer Not true
@@JSTPPodcast says the guy that took ''personally attacked'' litterally..
@@sebp400 how else should I take it?
@@bivvon8437 yes true
After laughing so hard, made me forgot about my useless degrees with thousands of student debt loans
Theresa, get out there and fight for loan forgiveness and govt paid college attendance.
the govt got you into it, they knew there weren't jobs, so work on them to get you out of it.
and great good luck!
haha
If your grown kid doesn't know how to open a checking account and write out a check, that's on YOU.
I was getting that disconnect
Thank you like she should've done something about that
My kids got their own library card when they first started reading, around Grade 1 and got their own savings account when they started saving, around 10 years old. Lived in a smaller town so it was possible for them to go on their own. Different times now I guess..
It's been years since I've written a check. I use a debit card. And I can instantly see my balance on my phone.
@@toshikotanaka3249 Really? You must be really smawt 😂🤣
I’ve always wanted to try comedy. I love making ppl smile and laugh. This world needs more of that.
Do it! 😀
Go for it! Laughter is one of the best antidepressants
you tube, darling, all the world's a stage!
As a parent of 3 teens this is absolute GOLD 🤣
The lady with the college grad waiter son was the best 👌
She was spiraling and it was a joy to watch.
My son went to University of Delaware also!!! He did Foreign Languages (Spanish, Japanese and Portuguese) 3 Language Program. He decided to take on Mandarin as a challenge.
He is now an English Teacher at an international high school in Beijing. Lives in a gated community two minutes from campus. He teaches the crazy rich Asian kids.
I went into college in 1998, planning to major in theater. Thankfully, a wonderful professor my freshman year talked me out of that pursuit and convinced me to become a Communications major. Dodged a bullet there!
Four years later, I didn’t even bother walking. I was working during the ceremony and my diploma was mailed to me a few weeks later. It was if I somehow knew that aside from forming a few great relationships, there wasn’t a whole lot worth celebrating. Today I’m fortunate to have a great job that I enjoy…and it’s one of many I’ve had that didn’t require a degree. As is usually the case with comedy, this video compilation is funny ‘cause it’s true.
Yet such a scam industry gets away with public robbery that makes Ponzi scheming Bernie Madoff look like a lightweight conman hobbyist. Higher education has become infested by corruption. Naive and hopeful would be Freshman are easy prey for the greedy predatory system that colleges have become. Its such an unethical entity of corruption that only appears to be aiding social progress like smoke and mirrors. Behind the shiny marketing, colleges exploit in the worst of ways to keep the easy funding funneling into their coffers.
@@Starry_Night_Sky7455 Hi there. I am very interested in hearing your perspective about corruption in universities, as you seem to have had negative experiences. May I ask specifically what you are referring to?
Did you really had to make the whole thesis
I have a nursing degree and an early childhood education degree.... I started a cleaning business and do side gigs like Uber and make 4x as much money as either of those. I got the degrees with the idea it would make me a better person, helping children.... unfortunately being a good person doesn't pay the bills 😕
@@ashleynicolle7047 RNs in my area can pretty much set their own hours and average $100k/yr. You must have one helluva cleaning business.
I came up with the paradox in jr. high: Teacher said, “ There’s an exception to every rule.” I said, “ Then that means there’s a rule with no exception, but…” Teacher told me I asked too many questions.
I have been told that my whole darn life LOL Maybe if people actually had answers and truths LOL I wouldn't have to ask so many questions!! RIGHT ?? LOL
This is brilliant.
They always say that when you're smarter than THEM
*lol...* ;-)
I've heard that the only guarantees in life are death and taxes, so I suppose this is a rule with no exceptions.
The timing of this one....I decided yesterday I'm going back to get another degree. FML
College students should sign an affirmation that they recognize their degree is useless.
they do when they sign the student loan ..kinda
Especially if the degree is Art History, Women’s Studies, African American Studies, English, History, etc.
@@kathyyoung1774 there's a thing called Women's Studies there?
@@shailendraahangama194 Yes, a degree program! Several universities have them. What can someone with that degree do for a career? Teach Women's Studies? B*tch about men? Celebrate and remind other women that they have a vagina? To what purpose? Your tax dollars at work.
colleges should post signs at the entrance "Enter at your own risk!"
Modern History Factories: Mainstream Media. Like they said in The USSR, "Everybody knows the future it's the past that keeps changing."
A great theologian with a philosophy degree told his kid, "What's the difference between a philosophy degree and a large pizza? A large pizza feeds a family of four."
I'm 31 and my fiance is 27. We went to the same high school but didn't date until later in life. I had to teach her how to write checks. Somewhere in those 4 years they stopped teaching kids how to deal with life and were more concerned with how being broke made u feel.
My ethics professor got caught with fraudulent degrees! 🤣
Ethics? What irony!
"You mean in Vegas?" "Close, Utah."
Thank you Dry Bar for this great compilation...'The Chart Guy' was very, very clever. Have a laugh America, it's good for you~!
A woman was looking for the perfect husband....
She dated a doctor - but all he wanted to do was examine it.
She dated a philosopher - but all he did was talk about it.
Then she dated a mechanic - he tore it up the first night and has been working on it ever since!
😄
👏👏👏
“No spellcheck for checks!”
😂
Degrees are one thing. Knowledge and philosophy common sense is another.
3:10 the “reading trance” hilarious…happens often to me as a person with ADHD 😆
"Until my mom heard that joke" 😂😂😂
My engineering degrees have served me well. But I agree that there are many degrees that are essentially useless.
This is why I tell all young kids to go to trade school instead. There are plenty of people working blue collar trades that are getting paid just as much or more than most white collar jobs in 2021.
I grew up in the 1980's. The teachers back then used to tell the students that if you don't make good grades and go to college, they are going to be doomed to digging ditches. I am willing to bet that ditch diggers get paid way more than the school teachers plus they get government benefits and government paid retirement.
Journeyman Electrician 2021. Much better than my BBA from the University of Michigan in 2002.
Fact. My brother in law works in trim design (minor cabin and external vehicle details) for one of the largest automotive employers in the world. He has a degree. He's salaried. Makes around 65-70k annually. I had 2 years of trade school. I work in a weld cell for the same company. I crush him in the earnings dept. year after year. On top of that, I get more paid time off, all the OT I want, AND a company matched 401. He's salaried, OT is not possible in his position and his 401 contributions are only as large as his non-OT position allows. By the time he retires, I will have been retired for 12 years and living off interest alone.
Trades school and apprentice
Associate degree in business administration now I’m self employed and make my living selling on eBay and poshmark. If I could go back I would of gone to trade school.
Trades school is where it’s at… my husband makes bank as a mechanic in a mine.
37:20 I gotta say as an Engineering major it was good to see some derivatives in comedy for a change
Might say they were integral to his performance.
As long as you're not a dy/dx.
Dont drink and derive!
He took it to the limit
change lol I see what you did there.
I went to school to be a chef and I am happy to say that after 15 yrs, I am building custom military humvees. Never underestimate the power of school 😂
Somebody must have jokes about colleges begging for alumni donations? That is quite funny.
John mulaney has a bit about that
As if their constant rise in tuition isn't enough.
I worked at a call center for the college for some months and the amount of times I heard people say along the lines of college didnt do anything for me for free was a lot.
Look up “John Mulaney Gets Cheated Out of 120k” and you will not be disappointed
I used to get letters from a Catholic women's college asking for donations, although I dropped out of it in the summer of 1993.
They wouldn't have to beg for donations if administrators didn't pad their pockets with rising tuition costs and states didn't cut appropriations by 75%.
I got an accounting degree and it worked out alright. It didn't sound particularly interesting but I never really had a dream job growing up and that at least seemed stable and had potential for growth.
You did the right thing studying accounting. You need a job that pays the bills and help finance your true passions.
You know what is not interesting? Poverty wages!!!
Nobody doesn't get to do what they want to do for a living. They get to do what OTHER people want you to do for a living.
I became an accountant at the age of 24. I stayed in it until I was 36 and left it due to the never ending boredom. I try to talk young people out of a career in accounting if they express any interest in it.
a kid who actually believed his parents? good for you.⛹
I have said it many times before and I'll say it again. One of the biggest mistakes I ever made was going to college. I finished five majors (my college allowed for a lot cross-application of classes), and so had a terrible time finding a job. And then I, being stupid and unable to learn, got a masters degree. Made it even harder. Thank God I didn't go for my PhD.
Say whaaaaa! When was this
How did your degrees make it difficult to get a job? You seem to have had interesting experiences that I am curious to learn about.
Can we invest the money you intend for PhD
Can you inform us of the degrees you've acquired?
To answer everyone's questions, I graduated from undergrad in 2006 and completed my masters in 2013. Undergrad majors finished were Journalism, Art History, Philosophy, German, and European Studies. I had a plan to use all of those to leap into a career in print journalism but we all know that's kind of a dead medium. So I went back to get a masters in organizational leadership. This admittedly allowed me to get better jobs than I had before, but it still wasn't easy to accomplish that. I received a lot of statements about over qualified (though I don't understand why) and am still kind of lost as to what I can do with most of my education.
5:25 You can give a philosopher anything - a dog - and by the time he stops talking about it, you will think that you never saw one before!
I love the Capital-ism joke from the English Major! 9:39
A friend sat a philosophy exam back in the 1970's. It had just one question, which was, "Is this a fair question?"
Everybody groaned and set to work. My pal wrote one line and walked out.
His answer was, "Is this a fair answer?"
He passed.
My brother had a teacher in high school who claimed to have sat a college exam that asked “Does God exist?” He simply wrote a reply of “Yes”. Passed. The story - true or not - gained him a lot of traction.
@@drazicmilosovic1065 I heard of one test: "Prove the chair you're sitting on exists."; A answer: "If it didn't, my butt would be on the floor."
Someone I knew took a philosophy exam where the question was 'how would you define bravery?'. They replied with the single word 'this'.
@@sgbh8874 touché Good Sir; I see you too have mingled with the minimalists of the motivational-world.
Respect to your pal for answering the question with a question.👊🏼😎
09:56 When I was in college, my parents relocated to Chicago. And I found them. LoL!
He could get work as a private detective!
I have a Master in Human Resources Management (which, in my country in the 90', was 7 years), a Post-Graduation in Labour Law and a Post-Graduation in Tourism Management... I am a housewife, outside my country, because thats where my husband, with the same master as me, could get a job!! So... University was a miss for me too.
🤔
@Christian Grant good for you, i guess the rest of us are pieces of $**t😶
@Muad'Dib well a silver spoon will make you say anything to those using their hands. Anyway enjoy your priveledge while it last. China will flip the switch soon
I respect housewives more than corporate staff cogs in the machine.
@@furthereast6775 thank you for saying so!
The REAL joke here is that we paid for all that "education".
Well, that's the price you pay for an education.
I love how the ads are for colleges on this.
Mine is hair regrowth serums and GI medicines.
@@CCGem xD
Mine are for planning trips
There was a time, years and years ago, when there had been a genuine shortage of educated people. College made sense then. Not so much now. 😭
There is a bigger shortage today, but you can't convince them that they are ignorant, and college can't make them smart.
In 2011, my paternal grandfather died at the age of 89 just six credits shy of his bachelor's degree. He was never able to attend university as a young man because he was in Pearl Harbor when it was bombed and served in the Pacific until the war was over. It was a goal he set for himself, so the utility of a degree really depends why you get a degree.
Sad part is, you're grandfather might have been disappointed in the education system these days. It's more indoctrination as compared to teaching. In his time, teachers could actually teach.
@@ocean3638 Yes, indoctrination is the word. First time I went to college was in the 1970's and enjoyed it and did well and graduated. About 20 years later I went back, and was quite disappointed in the program. I finished it, but was not nearly as happy about it as I was in the 1970's. Twenty years after that, I went back to college again and was so throughly disgusted by the lack of quality in the instruction (class time was a complete waste. Only chance to learn was after class at home. Instructors played favorites, Thirty percent of the class dropped out which was what the instructors wanted because they over-sold the program 30% above capacity then bullied out a third of the class, after the deadline for refunds) I was horrified. I did not complete. Any further courses I take will be online.
One of my close friends is finishing her Ph.D. In the next 6 months, at the age of 77. I admire that.
Honestly my English major has been incredibly useful. You would be surprised how many people can’t even compose an email.
I was the go-to person for writing reports and technical documents.
And you always will be? :-)
Did you have to go to college for that?
I’m not at all surprised. I’m constantly amazed that even those who write the news don’t use correct grammar.
But it really bites when the ones you're writing FOR get the credit...AND are getting paid far more than YOU!
Any college degree except STEM is a waste of money. Liberal arts education is best achieved by self study, without paying to an institution, maybe a community college at most.
At 37:30 my understanding of calculus flourished, and life is full, understanding the double derivative. Thank you.
I get over a 100% return on my MD per year. The issue is the system - should cost 20 grand a year not 50 - very unethical deans raking in 400k a year to do?
And unnecessary classes , college should act more as trade schools . This way all of your education is dedicated to your future job . This will limit the classes needed and the cost while improving your needed skill set
And teachers no longer qualified to teach, but are tenured.
Good for you.
It's about time somebody else said this... I saw that one on the Illinois list of public jobs. We have one married couple in the college system raking in $600,000-plus between them and a college admin. retiree making that much by himself, all on the taxpayer dime. Tuitions are ridiculous. Thomas Sowell explains how the costs went up.
Karl, they're living the good life and want us to sign a blank check for the "sake of education." We have to do something about the costs first.
I keep seeing a trend of parents that don't know how to teach their kids how to do anything
it's part of the nature of things today: modernity has made us all passengers on the ship of fools.
Yup. A lot of dumbasses for overpriced private schools.
And the ones who can afford to send their kids to private boarding school so that they can raise them instead
DO anything? How about starting w how to be a decent human being? A little girl held a door for me at the Laundramat a few days ago and I was astounded. Last time I saw any kid help anyone out in the world was some years ago in Mexico.
@@grandmalovesmebest That would be what I am saying. Parents know how to act, but don't know how to impart that wisdom onto their own children. Parents know how to do their own taxes but can't teach their kids how to make a grilled cheese of all things.
My degrees are in history and library & information science. I work for the government, so I suppose I was REALLY fortunate
God bless you. You were fortunate.
@@1bkres well, thanks. I love what I do, so it helps
Every VA hospital has a library and they hire Librarians at GS-11. I said what the heck...
Are you sure
@@Zimboprenuer considering I'm in a non-political role that plays to what I studied in undergrad and grad school, positive
The chart man was absolutely brilliant. Very, very , clever.
When your kids say they're going to college, say good luck and goodbye.
Tell to go to a trade school, learn a skill that's needed, half of trade jobs go unfilled today and they're hiring skilled workers.
A college degree is worthless to employers, they're looking for skills, not college degrees.
So true I did the whole college thing, then I had to re train in the field I ended up working in, I don't regret doing my degree, but 30k debt at the end of it was a high price to pay indeed
Forty minute visit from "Rooter Man" $240.00. Fifty minute visit from plumber to repair 1700.00 (rip off) job to re-do plumbing underneath my kitchen sink, $275.00. Toilet routering job from my purchase of toilet paper sourced from bamboo (aka "Insta clog,") $300.00. Not glamorous-- but these guys are making money. People pay when they can't flush their toilets or use their kitchen sink.
@@eagleeye2300 How do you not know how to do all those things you're?
Bruh tell that to my pharmacy degree. As long as you got a PharmD and a license, you can find a job anywhere. And you start off with a six figure salary.
College degrees are only useless if you dont know what you wanna be yet. Go in with a plan and you'll be better off for it.
@@ylvavarynkottir2265 Yep, but most don't do that, they get scammed with a useless degree and get into high debt.
The only thing I know about capitalism is, if there's a period the next letter is a big letter. 🤣🤣
Preach 😏
That's Aware! 😂😂😂
And that it’s better than communism
Wow. You have the ability to rewind to hear the joke as much as you want and you still got it wrong??? Perfect example of exactly what everyone of these comedians are saying!!! Good for you!!! The education system strikes again. LMAOOL!!!
@@brandonbancroft9411 and you had to ability to disagree with something and keep scrolling. 🤷🏻♀️
I chuckled about it the whole video. Excuse me if I didn't rewind back to get it word for word so you could enjoy it as much as I did. Lighten up. It's comedy, thats literally the point of it.
😂😂😂😂😂
That guy doing all the charts is Abso-FREAKING-lutely
BRILLIANT! 😂😂😂
True story. I’m a tradesman. I was in a customers home going over a job I was doing at the customers home and the small talk ensued. I asked after their kids and they said they had a daughter and were beaming about her, they said she has her masters in anthropology, to which I said “what? Does she want to work at Starbucks?? They shut up and were a bit too quiet, looked at the table and the husband got up and walked away shaking his head in dismay...the wife said (very quietly) actually, she does work at Starbucks...... I laughed out loud and the rest of the bid was a bit of a bummer...
This compilation is fantastic! 🤣
I know so many people with degrees and are working in fast food or service.
i know a person with a degree working in data science. my post is equally helpful as yours.
My oldest brother got a degree in history. Yeah that did not lead to too much. So he got a divinity degree. Upon graduation, he realized he did not have the calling. So he worked for an airline for a while and hated that. So he got a law degree. And he toiled as the only lawyer in a small town the rest of his life and died insolvent. Three degrees and he died in poverty.
Sorry to read this. The problem was not in getting the degrees, but in not knowing what to do. Had he asked God to lead him, things would have never ended up this way. Greetings from Poland 🇵🇱
Or, he could have ditched college altogether, and learned that working on things with your hands gets you dirty and smelly, but pays very well!
Law degrees aren’t useless unless you choose for them to be or are absolutely terrible at your job. I have attorneys in my circle and they’re quite wealthy.
@@chaveraoh So he got a divinity degree, but didn't get the right advice from God not to do that? Ah, the amount of stupidity on the internet these days...
@@tzenophile exactly
Omg Rodney Norman - 100% truth about the philosophy degree!! I was majoring in philosophy for the first two years of my degree. It was during an epistomology class (the nature of reality) when I realized, "Wow. How pointless could this possibly get? I need a real degree..." Rationalizing if things exist is a hilarious waste of everyone's time. I don't understand how anyone bothers.
Epistemology is about how we know anything.
Jamie Lissow (23:45) is a very natural and talented comedian. He also doesn't give off "I'm nervous." vibes which make *me* nervous.
I thought about becoming historian, because I loved history, but I didn't know where historians worked except schools, I hated my school, so I went to get engineering degree.
The failed audition...reminds me of Tobias Funke "IT'S A FIRE sale."
I got a medical degree and found out the hard way that I am not the only one that can save a life 😂😂😂
Got a degree in Waste Management. Had a connection with the President of the trade association for the continent. Was introduced execs at major firms. Still couldn't get a job. Why? They'd have preferred an engineer. Talk about getting a useless degree.
And what did they teach you in Waste management? They didn't teach you engineering, chemistry and ecology?
@@alexeysaranchev6118 taught him to collect trash, maybe?
@@FigaroHey Likely, the history of waste management in the U.S. and abroad. People shy away from statistics, applied engineering, physics, chemistry, and economics. Why? Because the require the student to demonstrate a grasp of empirical knowledge, formulas, and dynamics...which are hard courses where you have to STUDY (not party). Everyone wants easy courses to skate thru and just BS their way to a degree.
WHAT A WASTE!
I love when the audience cracks up the comedians 😁, great video! Really funny people! Thank you!
I have a Masters Degree in Forensic Psychology...hahaha well I'm considered a comedian too! Maybe I should have done that as well...Full of nuts.
I knew a guy with a bachelors degree in French. He had it framed in the bathroom right above the toilet with a sign saying "break in case of Emergency "
My bachelor's is in History, I guess I can be a comedian
at least until the History Factories re-open, eh?
Oh no hunny, you also have to be funny 😉
@@mamacito1795 what? No way. Apparently all you have to do is also complain about your wife, your kids, and how this generation just doesn't get it.
@@mywittyromance 😄 fair enough, you've got the job
Masters in psych here, ill drive to Utah if you pitch in for fuel?
One of the best Bar Comedy clips I've seen so far!
34:44 those charts and fractions were surprisingly smart and funny!!
I tried to combine love and business. Got a 5 year degree in Theatre Management. You can guess how many openings with pay were there.
Corona chan says Hi 😏👍👍
😓😓😓😓
2020 lock down year.😔
So...you sell tickets at the movies, are a projectionist, or run the concession stand?
I combined love and business too. Then I ended up getting locked up for prostitution.
@@bschuler6216 lmfaooo
"... just so you can know why they want fries with that..." ROFLMAO! 😆🤣