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I’ve felt this exact way for the past year and not wanted to publicly say that I didn’t like reading. BUT I’ve found that if I’m in a bad reading period in which I don’t feel like anything I read is good, I pick up a favourite of mine to reread which immediately sparks my joy for reading. I think that booktube makes us read so many books that we do become better at critiquing them, but also feel like a lot of what we read we’ve read before. Breaks from reading are important as well (even though I only end up needing a break of a few days). Anyway, this comment is all over the place but I’m kind of relieved to find out you feel the same way as I do!
Even though I’d obviously rather you hadn’t experienced this I’m glad it’s not just me 😅 I think about two weeks is my max and then I start to feel a bit lost without reading and like my life has lost a driving force. That sounds extreme but that’s how it feels! I’m definitely going to reread more and try to stop the channel from dictating my reading so much. Fingers crossed we both have a better reading year in 2018!
Here area few words from the Mom in me. First, you just started back to work full time. This takes enormous amounts of mental energy, (esp if it’s not “the job” that you always saw yourself doing). And, unfortunately, it gets harder as we mature in life to stay mentally focused beyond a typical work day. It’s okay to just be tired and checked out of your normal routine for a while. Re-read a few things you love as I saw a spark of job when you spoke about it. Reading shouldn’t feel like work, so be okay with letting your expectations fall by the wayside. If you’re concerned about channel content (which you certainly don’t HAVE to be) give us your fav re-reads! Second, I get a sense of sadness or depression from you. Sorry if I’m butting in too much, but if you’re feeling down in other areas too, please get a physical. Something as simple as low iron or low Vit D can sap the enjoyment for normal things right out of you. Also world events are freaking depressing for lots of people these days and reading too much contextual info can add worry rather than just insight. So, just be sensitive to whether any book is sapping your joy in life and be okay with setting those aside for another time. Okay, Mom talk over, Now go re-read something fun!!
Cheryl Holsonbake Hi Cheryl, thanks so much for your lovely, thoughtful comment. I think being back at work full time has certainly played its part. Work has been very stressful and I’ve been feeling a bit low in general so I think it’s all come to a head recently and resulted in a lack of enjoyment in the things I usually love. I’m hoping that next year will be an easier, brighter one and that my reading will be better as a response. I was reading a rather bleak memoir that I’ve put aside for now as I don’t think it’s the right time for me to read it. Instead I’m going to pick up a favourite and reread and hope the comfort and familiarity helps cheer me up ☺️ xx
I love your mom talk! Those are good points about other life events taking their toll. I also agree about the reading. Rereading books always gets me out of a rut! But it should definitely be enjoyable, not work! :)
I adore these chatty videos so much!!! I'm having a different problem (just physically not having time to read for pleasure versus reading for grad school) but I really found this relatable. I also don't want to read for the average ones, I want to find books that blow me away! If I were you I would give myself a break for the rest of the year, reading whatever you manage, and then jump on 2018 with a new invigoration!
I blame the statistics driven lifestyle. You're not meant to fuss over how many books you own, or have read, or own and haven't read. Ok, the last one might require some restraint, buy only what you will read immediately while your tbr shelf is getting manageable. But you're not meant to fuss over statistics. That's for every once in a while when you want to refocus yourself. Just live, focus on picking up what you get excited about, read or unread, goodreads be d... At least that's where I am concluding about my own dismal reading situation lately. For starters I think I'll hide from my view my stressful, enormous, oh-i-wish-i-had-already-read-those. They are only stressing me out. And I want to read them and I don't.
Desp K I agree. I think so much of the stress comes from my hyper awareness of my reading stats through booktube and goodreads. I’m going to make a real effort to really chill my reading brain out and allow everything to feel much more organic. Fingers crossed I manage it! Thanks for your comment ☺️
Desp K More like, buy books you HAVE read and enjoyed. The library is a great place to put that practice in use. Borrow books and if you love them, buy them. That's how I've been doing it.
rosedaline valetine I can tell this has been a trigger to some. I agree with getting books that you already love, however you had access to the text. But I was thinking about the self-conciousness of reading habits and how that spoils the reading itself. I don't have any answers. I just didn't have a good reading year either.
I really love Lala’s closet unhaul videos. I think it’s a fun way to get through books you’ve owned for awhile but haven’t read. Whenever I get stuck, I love getting excited about a new reading project. Sounds like you have a great plan! However you figure it all out, I hope you love reading again soon. Cheering for you from across the pond. 💕
Oh love, no crisis points please. I think we all have phases with reading and books, sometimes we can’t read enough, some times we don’t want to read anything. I also think we change and adapt as readers and what we like. Plus I think we have to read books we don’t love as much as others so we enjoy all the ones we love even more. I wonder if we find less books we REALLY love the older we get and the more we read. Maybe it’s just, sadly, a bad year for you reading wise this year. None of that’s probably helpful is it? Rubbish friend aren’t I? Ha.
I’m right with you girl!! I’ve also had a horrible reading year! There is only one book I’ve read all year that has stuck with me. I DNF’d a lot of books this year, and spent most of the summer and in to the fall in a huge slump. You’re not alone!!!
This video is SO real. I don't have any advice (I've been thinking about a lot of the same things recently so I'm in no position to suggest anything for other people), but I just identified a ton with a lot of this. Especially how you talked about the difference between the way you think about a book like The Clay Girl when you have a reviewing platform vs. when you just read it for yourself. That's a hard balance I've been struggling with a lot this year, and it's sort of a relief to hear someone else talk about it
I had a crappy reading year too! When I think back I have read almost nothing that would make it onto my "2017-favorites"-list. I think I need to get better at focusing on the really promising books, and actually get rid of the mediocre-looking ones. I think your thoughts seem really reasonable, like reading the book while you're excited about it. I'll take that into account when assembling my reading goals for 2018. It's nice to hear someone else share this feeling! :)
I’m so glad you made this video but I’m sorry for how you’re feeling, it’s frustrating. I can definitely relate, I feel like I’m losing my identity, which sounds dramatic. My friends know me as a reader but it’s like lately I’ve been collecting books instead of reading them. It seems like no book can hold my attention anymore. But I’m trying not to feel guilty about it and realize that it’s just a slump. Best wishes to you!
I think sharing this is really important. Often, when we define ourselves as readers, it can send us onto such a crisis when we aren’t enjoying it. I’ve been doing the majority of my reading in audio format recently and not wanting to actually look at the words. And even that has made me feel very strange! Take your time with getting back into the swing of things, your enjoyment will take a turn for the better. Making BookTube videos can definitely add to the pressure some times, but try not to let it overwhelm you. 💕
I read the Raqqa Diaries after you hauled it in a video. I loved it. It was one of those books that broke my heart, made me speechless, and infuriates with the lack of help from larger countries those people get.
I loved how frank and honest this was. I know exactly the feeling you are discussing here. I don’t know that I have had it over as extended a period of time as you have, but it has definitely existed during different times in my reading life. It is comforting to hear someone who reads as much as yourself admit similar feelings. I don’t have much in the way of advice unfortunately. But I had a nosey through your goodreads shelf and noticed Sour Heart by Jenny Zhang. I read and loved this recently and think it would be right up your alley. It features all young female protagonists and focuses on themes of class and cultural identity. The writing style is quite unique and beautiful. I hope your reading life takes a more positive turn! Best wishes 😊
highly appreciate your honesty! i have been fallen out of love with reading a bit but i am ok with it. i feel like it will always be an up and down anyway so it will come around x
I started re-reading more this year and it has made me feel so great about reading. Whenever I find myself in a bit of a slump, I go back to a book I love and it gives me a boost. So I think that's a great idea!
I always appreciate your honesty. I feel like I've read a lot of disappointing things this year, too. I also recently was looking back at 2015 and thinking "wow, what a great year!" I read so many amazing things back to back and had no idea at the time what a treasure trove I'd discovered. I have read some pretty amazing things, too, but sometimes it does feel like a slog to find the really great stuff. I feel disillusioned about books and/or booktube every few months or so, and try to adjust to make things fun again. I hope you can find the joy in it, too :)
I've gone through years before where some type of entertainment (for one period it was novels, but I've had the same experience with comics, games, and right now with TV) is just not something I want to devote my free time to. I think of it as a natural phase and try not to worry about it. I can definitely see how being dedicated to a booktube video schedule must make you feel it that much more strongly about it though, since it forces you to look at numbers every week. I like your new method for thinking about favourites. I know for myself the way I feel about a book is often tied to the moment, so making that context explicit like that sounds like a brilliant way of framing those reads. I hope it doesn't end up adding too much stress to your life! :)
I know what you mean 100%. This year since I've stopped making videos too has taken a lot of pressure off of me to read as much as I normally might, and so I've spent more time watching movies and shows I would've normally neglected for reading instead. And even though I haven't had the most stellar reading year, there have been a few standout books that I've really loved because I've read less and focused on reading books that I'm genuinely excited about. But also I need to get better at DNFing haha cause I will still force my way through books I *think* I should like or finish but that I'm not, in the moment, enjoying. It's so silly. Looking at your TBR shelf, I think you should read In Order to Live, especially for Non-fiction November! It's incredible. Signs Preceding the End of the World is a great little novel too. Their Eyes Were Watching God is one of my favorite classics, and Furiously Happy will make you laugh and cry so when you need to feel all the feels that's a good one.
I firmly believe that pretty much everything in life comes in waves. You might not be reading great books right now and therefore be less passionate about reading, but that doesn't have to mean it's always going to be like this from now on. Maybe the books that are being written and published right now are just not completely your cup of tea? I feel like writing is also subject to certain fashions, so maybe your taste is just not "in" right now, but it'll come back. Doesn't mean you've failed as a reader or anything. In the meantime, there's so much other stuff you can enjoy!
The Sheep and the Wolf that’s such a good point about types of books being published around the same time. I’ve been thinking all year that I haven’t enjoyed being so focused on new releases but somehow I’ve not managed to stop it! I’m 100% going to change that going forward and reach for older books ☺️
It might just be me, but I feel like there's a lot of pressure within the booktube / book blogging community as well to stay on top of new releases, read ARCs and post reviews of books that aren't even out yet. And I mean, I get it, I participate in it sometimes and it can definitely be fun, but there's nothing wrong with going for a backlist book! I am like you in that I also used to reread a lot, but stopped doing that because there's so many new, exciting books that I also want to read, and there's simply not enough time. But I do find that when I start to feel "meh" about reading, it really helps to pick up an old favourite and enjoy the familiarity and nostalgia.
I can relate to this kind of feeling very much. But I want to thank-you for doing all the hard work and letting us know what the good books are. Your high standards have helped me in the journey to pick up books and certain knowing that there is a high chance I will love it. Also very proud of you to be honest on the situation and coming up with this video instead of painting the perfect bookish person. I highly appreciate that.
Recently, I was having the same thoughts about the excitement of picking what to read next, getting it from the bookstore or wherever and starting reading it on the way home or the same night. So, I agree. It's really worth trying to reduce the amount of books you own just to experience that again.
I had a bad reading year a few years ago, where I wasn't enjoying reading as much as I used to. It was such a heart break, like losing a friend, or a part of myself. My reading tastes were changing, my time available for reading was shrinking, and I was tougher to please. I ended up just pulling away from reading, ignoring my TBR shelves, and only reading things that really jumped out to me. It's totally ok to detach and stop for a bit. No rules or goals, just see what books fling themselves onto your lap.
I'm not a massive reader. But i've had the same feeling as you concerning films. I used to be a big film buff, but then started getting bored and uninterested in them a couple of years back. So Instead of watching films i started consuming other kinds of entertainment, which meant that I started watching a lot of theatre plays and performances instead, which I've never really done before - and I got really exited about that. The last couple of months though, I've started getting into films again, and I now appreciate film as a medium again. My point is I think it's natural to get a bit bogged down when you consume a lot of the same form of entertainment. And it's healthy and natural to try out new kinds 'entertainment', cause it makes you excited, and gives you a more nuanced perspective and appreciation of the different mediums. And then returning to the medium you originally loved is a bit like coming home again.
I've been in a very similar situation actually, and I've been watching tv/movies much more than reading because I'm sick of the pressure. I've had a lot of 3 star reads too and I think one 5 star book which is crazy (although a few 4.5 star reads so maybe I'm being too critical?). I've been planning a video for December to talk about my plans for 2018, but I'm the same in that I want to bring down the TBR. Glad I'm not the only one!
So I had a mostly three star reads year in 2016 and I was feeling so meh for a while, however this year it’s been mostly 4/5 star reads and it was literally a case of finding a specific genre that I was LOVING and not forcing myself to read other stuff on my shelf that I wasn’t feeling. Literally I’ve been buying books and reading them Immediately instead of reading stuff I’ve had for years which is bad for my TBR but has been great for my reading year.
My advice. Go back and rate Clay Girl 5 stars - you really loved that when you read it. I remember the cosy reading night video. State its problems in the review if you must but embrace your love. The same goes for all your other loved/favourite books. I have books I loved that I dislike now but I loved them then and that was true. There are books I hated (school reads) that I love now but my hate was genuine then. Advantage of being middle aged is that you don't give a F what people think but embrace what brings you joy. Again only my 2 cents.
Maria Hill I know exactly what you mean! It’s more me overthinking it than worrying so much what others think though. I think reading so much and documenting it through the channel means I analyse my reading and who I am as a reader way more than an average reader. I agree that it’s important to be ok with loving a book even if you’re aware of its flaws. But for me a favourite book is one I loved and couldn’t criticise - which tends to be quite rare these days 😅
MercysBookishMusings Maybe if you view Books more like you view people it might help. You have people that you love, and “favorite people.” That doesn’t mean they’re perfect or that you’ll never criticize them. Look at books the same way. Love or favoritism doesn’t have to equal perfection or inability to find anything to critique. You can love them and still see a flaw. I know that sounds weird, but it helped me when I was in a really bad reading time. I stopped judging so harshly and trying to see the good where others saw it (or the bad.) When I took the pressure off of myself I enjoyed it a lot more. 😊😊
My 5 stars reads from the shelf you mentioned are Do Not Say We Have Nothing and The Hours, and I have one 4 stars read, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness. I really enjoyed them. Hope you find something amazing on your shelves. ;)
Off your unread shelf, I highly recommend Such Small Hands by Andres Barba, it's quite short and terribly creepy. I also greatly enjoyed The Man with the Compound Eyes and think that seems up your alley. And A Single Man is one of my all-time favorites
Ok, I have not read a single book on your Goodreads tbr list. So I'm not much help at all but the two books from the list I'd personally be most excited to read would be "the Woman in White" and "Daphnis and Chloe".
I found one book on that goodreads shelf I want to hype - Sense and Sensibility. It's just as witty as other Jane Austens, and the sisters' bond is great. This book read very differently at 16 and at 23, and I guess it will change again. Good luck with culling. This video and Ariel Bissett's video on competitive reading has inspired me to cull my collection of unread books as well.
I just went through your Goodreads shelf, and here is what I have to recommend: - Their Eyes Were Watching God (SUPER recommend based on your read books) - The Picture of Dorian Gray - Sense and Sensibility - Do Not Say We Have Nothing (the first half is SO weak, but the second half is stellar) The books I don't recommend from this shelf are: - We Need New Names - On the Road
Thank you for the honesty! I think I need to take a page out of your book re: ratings. I seem to round up my ratings, and on looking back at my year of books, some of the ratings I gave them were inaccurate. New Years Reso is to be more strict with my rating system. In terms of books on your shelf, I see you have The Mother of All Questions: Further Feminisms - this one is rather short so it's an easy one to cross of your list before the New Year :)
I'm in some sort of slump too. Is it the time of year? It shouldn't be. It's prime cosy reading weather. I need to learn to dnf sooner. I don't think I've read a 5 star book this year. I often wonder if I'm overly critical. But mainly I need to waste less time on mediocre books. I haven't made a video for months either:( sigh. Hope things pick up for you too Mercedes x
Rereading is in my opinion quite helpful in times like that. I can totally understand what you mean about the excitement just fading away. I don't own a lot of unread books because that's what I am afraid of. And I like using the library more because if I stop being excited about a book I can just return it. :)
Thank you so much for posting this! I don't know if you've noticed, but I haven't posted in a few months. I haven't been reading, and I have just found myself doing other things. Sometimes I wish I was reading, and a book might sound good, but when I pick it up....it just automatically doesn't sound good, or I just don't feel like reading it after all. I feel as though I've become a lot more critical as well, and because of the same things you mentioned. Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels this way right now. :)
It's surprising how many people seem to feel the same way! I thinking having a channel certainly exacerbates the problem because it's an added pressure. I hope your reading picks up and I look forward to seeing your face in my subscriptions again when it does :)
I can really relate to this experience. I had something very similar about four years ago, where I found myself becoming incredibly cynical about the quality of the books I was reading. I only read 29 books all year and hardly liked any of them. I think it was partly about being on the new release treadmill for a long time before that, which is so untrustworthy, and partly, like you say, about approaching every book with an eye to how I was going to review it. I started to question myself really closely whenever I thought a book was good to guard against gushing about it. I also found that it was easier to believe my negative responses to a book than my positive ones. It's definitely one of the effects of living your reading life online and under the spotlight. I don't know what changed for me really, other than that I allowed myself to like books for different reasons and rate them for different reasons. There is so much dissonance on my Goodreads page now! Wolf Hall, my favourite book of all time, has 5 stars, but so does a period romance novel I read last year that really touched me. It still makes me wince a bit but I'm letting it stand because it was true to my experience at the time. I think going back and re-reading is a really good tactic to help rebalance, because it reminds you of what you love.
Thanks so much for your comment! Everything you had to say about reading in the public eye and reading books to review is exactly how I feel! The last few weeks I've been working really hard to shed all the silly bookish/channel rules I have and I've been feeling much more positive about my reading and excited about my channel :)
I have felt similar... my new way of book buying is to buy one for every two I read(although I am a slow reader) and read it straight away. It's working so far because I'm having less accumulate and losing the initial excitement. And feels like a little reward every time!
From the books you own but haven't read shelf my two favorites are the Vegetarian by Han Kang ( I read this book in one day and didn't stop thinking about it for weeks. This book sucks you in and you can't stop. It could be really good to get you back into reading.) and The Birds and Other Stories by Daphne Du Maurier ( love this much more than Rebecca. I feel it's kind of a weirdly cozy creepy book and I really enjoyed almost every story.)
This was really interesting. The other day I listened to one of your podcast episodes from earlier this year, when you were saying you've been reading a lot of new releases and haven't really been getting on with them. Perhaps it's that? I don't have a Booktube channel but I still feel a lot of pressure to have read all of the popular/classic books because I am considered by people to be A Reader. I always feel a bit bad if I'm not keeping up to date with new releases or if I haven't read the "classic" books that everyone knows about. This year I have been trying to read more of those kinds of books, and I've found I just haven't been enjoying them (for example, I just DNFed The God Of Small Things). Next year I'm not going to worry about reading books I feel like I should.
Hello, Just to say I was feeling exactly like you last year and this year it has changed for me and I have felt a lot more enthusiasm for reading and really enjoyed a lot of the books I have read. For me it was partly state of mind and partly,I just needed a bit of a break from reading.... Which is healthy. I also find personally that if I spend too much time on the internet I loose my concentration and enjoyment for reading..... That's just me though☺ As for the books on your to-read shelf on Good reads I can really recommend ' House of the Spirits' by Isabel Allende and also ' Prickle Moon' by Juliet Marillier . Infact , I have to say that if I am in a reading slump I always pick up a Juliet Marrilier as I love her writing so much. Good luck !!x
It sucks that you feel like this, but I can relate!! I've had a look at your Goodreads shelf and I have 3 recommendations for amazing books and 2 for ones I don't think are worth the time (obv subjective but may help?). Three faves: Wide Sargasso Sea, The House of the Spirits and Sense and Sensibility, two duds (for me): Ladies of Grace Adieu and The Rental Heart. I won't presume to give you any more advice, but I hope your love of reading comes back soon xxx
I’ve been feeling that way for months! I haven’t felt a true sense of enjoyment while reading a book in awhile. I don’t know if it’s the books or if it’s me. I’m going to keep trying though but with no pressure. I’ll DNF what it isn’t holding my attention, read when I feel like it,
The last few years for me were crappy reading years. I read like 86 books in 2012, 50 in 2013, 20 in 2014, 10 in 2015, 20 in 2016 and shot back up to (I’m currently on) Book 60 for this year. We know what it’s like, don’t beat yourself up too much - it happens to everyone!!
I really like the idea of reading a few books around a topic and then discussing them. I've become a big DNFer as well, and I think there's nothing wrong with that. Becoming more critical is a natural part of becoming older/wiser (I think), and so I really wouldn't worry. I really enjoy the honesty in your videos and reviews, so please don't go changing that. I'm only here to see your honest opinions!! In the words of America 'you do you'. Laura x
Hi Mercedes. I rarely watch a 20 minute video from start to finish (the typical attention span 😂) but I followed this from start to finish and entirely understand. My advice: literally just reread favourites for however long you like. Sometimes I like to devote one month as a Reread Month so I just go back and hunt for old favourites. Often, if that happens, I feel like taking a step back from rereading after a while and that gives me the itch to read new stuff again. So that is what I say! :-))) P.S. Middlemarch is on your Goodreads TBR. Probably not a great idea for a slump 😂 but it is one of my ultimate favourite books of all time.
Really appreciate the honesty and realness in this video - and I'm sorry your reading year hasn't been going so well. I glanced at your "own but haven't read" TBR, and I would say that you should absolutely read Their Eyes Were Watching God at some point - I read it in high school and college and just picked up a new copy of it because I want to do another re-read (and I normally never re-read!)...it's just incredible. I also think The Invisible Man is a great book that I wish more people would read. And lastly, I think I remember you not liking Jane Eyre too much, so I would say maybe give Wide Sargasso Sea a shot? It's pretty short and is a great response to/critique of Jane Eyre (both in terms of content/point of view and in terms of style).
For me no matter how bad something is I would never cancel my reading of it. I gain as a person through the good books and the bad books. The good tv shows and the bad. For everything good thing that helps me grow, there is a bad thing that achieves the same outcome. Good and bad make up my life and I would never take back a bad reading experience.
I would still appreciate a wrap up from the year! As long as you’re being honest and referencing this video and how you felt throughout the year, then I would really love your opinions :) even if there’s only two in the video!
The last two months have been the worst for me. I have hardly read a thing, and what I do read I don't finish. I've failed at all the readathons and I think I felt very pressured to finish reading books from my TBRs. I also stopped posting on Instagram because I feel like I've lost my bookish spirit. I think I needed a break. Moving forward, my plan is to finish the library books I currently have out (if I can), and from that point forward I'm just going to read what I desire in that moment. No more TBRs! I need to get back to reading simply for the love of reading! (Not to accomplish something, or stay current, or read what everyone else is reading).
I've been in a similar position! I'm still reading a lot but with a lot of low ratings and I'm finding that the books that I'm loving are things that I wouldn't have even been interested in a year ago. It's strange but I think it comes from thinking critically about the books you read and just tastes changing. Maybe just go back to rereading some favourites? I pretty much exclusively use the library now and that makes dnfing so much easier!
You have the End of the Affair on your TBR. It's my all-time favorite book. It made me view and feel spirituality differently than before. Lathe of Heaven and Cat's Cradle, also on your TBR was 5-stars fun. I also own some books that I might set free soon, ala Marie Kondo's Konmari method.
That's the beauty of reading. Books affect people in different ways depending on where they are in their life. So please just do you, and enjoy the journey of reading whenever you feel like it. Love your channel.
Re-reading sounds wonderful. Also, it is possible the books put out this year just aren’t that great and I think most books you chose to read this year were put out this year. A great read for any year is a lot to ask. Maybe read books that are older, more tried and true. Also, I am pretty sure we watch your channel to get your view point and saying, “yes, there were problems, but I don’t care” is okay - it’s your life, embrace the oddity of a full life.
Thank you so much for the video Mercedes! I love your channel and it always makes me excited to see that you posted another video. I just picked up the Essex Serpent from my library this weekend, based on your recommendation, and am loving it so far! Your effort is very much appreciated. I scrolled through your Goodreads but only found one title I recognized (On The Road) and I haven't personally read it yet.
I was feeling a bit like this around a year ago. The key for me was to stop giving star ratings on Good Reads. My thoughts on most books I read are way too complicated to rate out of 5, I'd rather just keep my thoughts stored in my head until I meet someone else who has also read it or get chatting to a bookseller in Waterstones! I realise it's not as easy for you to do that, but it might take some pressure off? I also enjoy going into a bookshop or a library and picking up a book I've never heard of and know nothing about. Sometimes seeing the same books everywhere makes me feel like reading them is a chore. Still not picked up The Essex Serpent although I'm sure I'll like it.
Every time you pick up a book it's a bit of a gamble ,you invest a bunch of your time no knowing if it'll pay off but you do it anyway for the chance that it might.There's a reason gambling is addictive for me discovering new stories is too)
Omg this is exactly how I feel this year. Most of my reads have been 3 or 2 stars. I think I figured out what my problem was though, Booktube. I was taking so many recommendations from other people online and not enjoying other people’s 5 Star reads or favourites. Not to say those books weren’t good books, they just weren’t for me. I guess I have different taste which is absolutely fine, an example would be the Tidal Zone which I really disliked but yet is one of so many others favourite book. I think once I take a step back and just carefully select books based on my personal taste and re-reading my favourites, I think my love for reading will slowly come back. But trying to read everybody else’s recommendations was the problem for me!
Im sorry to hear you are feeling this way Mercedes. I actually had a talk to a friend of mine the other day about favourite books and recommending them to people and I feel the same way you do. It can be difficult to do sometimes because you could love a book at a certain time of your life and it can be the thing you needed at the time and becomes a favourite but then may be something you may not like years later. My reading taste has definitely changed since I was in my early twenties and I love seeing how I have grown as a reader. My advice would be to take a day to yourself to go to the bookstore, pick up one book that appeals to you in that moment, go home and read it straight away. Have snacks and drinks ready for your day of reading 😊 I have done this myself one time when I was feeling the same as you where I was a bit meh about everything I had and it truly helped me to get out of that frame of mind. Hope this helps you xo
I've definitely been feeling this way this year as well! Looking back on all the books I've read this year, I only have a handful that I genuinely enjoyed or that I know will stick with me. I think, for me, I'm not a harsh enough DNFer because I'm kind of competitive and I feel like I need to finish everything I start, especially if I spent money on it. I also have a hard time unhauling books for the same reason. This was such a good video because it's making me feel like I need to confront my own mediocre reading. Hope the rest of the year's reading goes well for you! :)
Okay I just had a look at your Goodreads shelf and here's the ones that I can encourage you to go for: The Ladies of Grace Adieu and Other Stories by Susanna Clarke (I love her writing!), Heap House by Edward Carey (SO much fun and the illustrations are absolutely wonderful.), Furiously Happy by Jenny Lawson (A true pick-me-up and hilarious (which duh).), & Do Not Say We Have Nothing by Madeleine Thien (You mentioned falling deep into Clay Girl and thinking about it when you weren't reading it? This book was the same for me.). Good luck and just remember: If you're not interested, don't bother. Reading is above all supposed to be FUN. :-)
I've had burnt out periods with reading, sometimes lasting 6 weeks or so, where I don't pick up a book, don't watch booktube, don't go on goodreads etc. From analysing it, I know it's from spending too much time watching booktube, sitting on goodreads, reading reviews etc during the times that I am reading books. I know if I had a booktube channel, this would inflate those issues. I've worked out I have a limit to how much I can read each day, how much I can spend on bookish things like booktube, goodreads and so on. I'm learning from these things and hoping I can find a level at which my reading won't suffer.
I know what you mean, I recently had quite a big reading slump and couldn't understand why, because I was constantly thinking about wanting to read since I never stopped loving reading but I just was never in the "right mood". For me it was kind of a stressful period and a moment of "transition" in my life that felt smaller than it was in retrospective. When I relaxed and stopped being preoccupied with my reading things kinda went into place by themselves really. I know you have a channel and you feel pressure to bring content as well as wanting to enjoy the reading experience for yourself and maybe you are your own harshest (is that even a word?) judge but my advice is (and it's not ground-breaking at all) to really do what you feel. If you feel like not reading and instead watch tv just do that, nothing will take away your passion for books even if you abandon them for a little while. Having said so I checked your Goodreads shelf and I personally really enjoyed An Unrestored Woman, a beautifully written short story collection (and I don't particularly enjoy short stories usually), so definitely give it a go if it sounds nice to you! Whoa this was long. Hope you have a great evening! xx
I strongly believe in re-reading books, if it doesn’t stand up to a second read, then it wasn’t that good in the first place! I know you could be spending the time reading an unread book from your shelf but re-reading a book you love is like nothing else! I always use a re-read as a reset button for my reading, if I’ve not liked anything I’m reading or am feeling a bit ‘blah’ about reading in general and don’t feel inspired to read at all, an old favourite will always bring me round!
I'm so sorry you're not enjoying reading much right now. But, I can totally relate to what you said. I was slumpy over the summer. But all of a sudden, I'm loving everything I read. I really wish I knew why that is. I might do a response video. Anyway, the Compare Books feature on GoodReads made your task very simple. (Although, I thought you had read a couple of these.) So, here are the books from your shelf that I gave 4 or 5 stars. Neon Green, An Unrestored Woman, The Faster I Walk The Smaller I Am, Signs Preceding the End of the World, The Tsar of Love and Techno, The One-in-a-Million Boy, and The Vegetarian.
I always feel this way when I read too many contemporary books. They just leave me feeling bored and down. I rarely read anything written post-2000. Maybe a good Victorian chunkster might help?
Just had a peep at your shelf and I really recommend Their Eyes Were Watching God! It's so moving but not soppy, it's really powerful in terms of characters and language, and it's a really important book too. Also, I second those on here who say you should give re-reading a go! I've been through phases where I was falling out with reading (or, more specifically, falling out with people's writing!) but then I've read or re-read something really really well-written and it's proven me wrong!
And if you're ever looking for something silly and fun, go for Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day! I wouldn't call it 'great literature' but it's very well-written anyway, and just enjoyable!
Oooh i love negative videos!! I find them so cathartic. I think it's good personally that you are more critical now. It probably means you won't waste as much time reading books you don't think are worth it. I don't care how many books you read in a month lol just as long as you are happy. Go and re-read as many books as you want if you'd rather do that. I love seeing people's thoughts after a re-read or just seeing that they've re-read something, let's me know they actually enjoyed that book or that there was something about it that makes them ponder over it and want to explore the book again. I appreciate you being so candid with us all about your feelings xoxo
I love this video. It's so honest. I have been in a reading slump about June / August. Weirdly, this video has inspired me to start reading again. Thanks so much for your honesty! If I can recommend two books on your unread and owned TBR they would be Birdie by Tracey Lindberg and My Brilliant Career by Sarah Marie Miles Franklin. Birdie is kind of a non-linear magical realism novel told by a Cree woman, about women, it's about the different relationships women have with each other and it feels very cathartic and I love it. My Brilliant Career by Sarah Marie Miles Franklin is a bit of a chunkier book and feels like a rough and ready Pride and Prejudice set in the Australian outback. Lots of feminist themes and about a young woman growing up poor and wanting to write. I didn't like the heroine at first, and then I loved her. Hope this helps. Your video helped me.
I totally get this I agree with your plan of action and I’m trying to do the same cull my massive unread books so I can get that exciting feeling back of reading something I’ve just bought Also I work in a library and I think you start reading stuff that you think you “should read” and it’s just not a book that gives or fits your personal fuzzies
I'm sorry to hear this! Maybe you need a break as sometimes that can rekindle feelings! Or you could read a genre you've always loved to sort of coax you back into it?
I'm (slowly) climbing out of a reading slump that's lasted a good 5 years and what's been helping me, is reading comics/graphic novels or old favourites; something that's a quick read or familiar. Re-reading Harry Potter might help? The most important thing is not to put too much pressure on yourself. If you don't feel like reading, allow yourself a break.
I feel like when I am pushing myself to get through a certain amount of books or if I have a set tbr pile, It sucks the fun out of reading for me. I stress myself out too much. I also have noticed that I also give lower ratings. Im thinking more about crossing a book off my list rather than enjoying what I am reading. *hugs* friend. Im hoping this gets better for you. Maybe re-read some of your favorites for a while or take a step back. Thats ok too.
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Tbh I think sometimes it's best to just allow yourself to take a break and come back when you miss something rather than forcing it into becoming a chore. Booktube has this strange tendency to create a pressure to rack up numbers or at least to be constantly reading, and that if you find yourself not reading for a week it's something to be guilty about. But it really is just reading, and like all interests we burn out or mentally wander off sometimes and it's not a personal failing or anyone else's business if you just decide to ignore books for the rest of the week, or the rest of the year. I think when we lilypad from book to book we often find a lot of them mediocre because we don't experience them at their best. They're just the 'NEXT!' in line of a never ending TBR and I feel that we appreciate each book less because we've got half an eye on just getting it finished so we can move on. Just do what feels right, maybe take a break and just enjoy the Harry Potters for a bit and come back when you feel the itch for it again. Books aren't going anywhere :)
I feel the same way. I don't know if it's because I'm stressed and the books I read make it worse. Or if could be that if I read lighter fare, it doesn't hold my already fickle attention. Then it could be that I am simply overwhelmed at the sheer amount of books that I want to read, that I just don't pick up a book at all. I always have to take a break for self-evaluation.
I think in a way it's a sort of desensitization as well--at least when you have to read at a certain rate to be able to do booktube which is odd because I feel like the reason most booktubers get into booktube is BECAUSE we already read at a certain rate? I absolutely relate. It takes so much more for me to feel something about a book these days, moreso something positive.
Sometimes I just have to take a complete reading break. Don't open a book at all for a few weeks, focus on another hobby, see how I feel when I pick up a book again. When you're reading 100+ books a year, I think it's quite easy to get burnt out.
Thank you for being honest. I think most people go through periods where they question the way they approach books or their reading habits. I think you should take some time and reread some old favorites. I wish you happy reading in whatever you decide to do.
i go through the same. i pick up a book. it seems ok. i read 50 pages and then think "what's the point". it's boring. like eating carboard. so i go back to toni morrison.
I imagine it’s hard for you to change your reading habits now that you have so many subscribers. It places a lot of pressure on you to read what’s popular and to read all the time. Some people below mentioned treating books as you would a friend. That seems very reasonable. If you enjoyed a book, give it 4 or 5 stars even if you had a few minor problems with the book. Reviews and wrap ups are the norm on booktube, but you could always do something different. Maybe you want to do certain things on your channel but you don’t know how it will be received. Since you’re in a reading slump, you should try doing those things now. I enjoy your channel Mercedes. I don’t read many books published by small independent presses. You’ve introduced me to some interesting sounding books in the past year that are not published by large publishers.
I've had the same feelings for the last year. And for me it was simply a rubbish year, not necessarily rubbish books. I don't even know what eventually got me out of it. I think it was just picking a book I was genuinely interested in and then make myself read like 5 or 10 minutes each day. I also buddy read a book and I think that helped too. Just don't pressure yourself too much, because that definitely won't work. And if you feel like rereading a favourite; do so! If that could maybe get you back into reading and if you enjoy it, why do something else? ;)
This is such an interesting video, I loved it! I've had a similar experience this year; I've given so many books 3 stars and I don't really know why, but I do notice myself getting more and more critical, which is fine but not always fun, if you know what I mean. I'd actually be really interested in seeing you reread your favorites and talk about them though :) From your TBR, the only one I found that I've read and really enjoyed was The Man With The Compound Eyes, but it's kind of a weird book, so I feel like maybe it should be read when you're in the mood for it, so that's no help :P
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So sorry to hear that you're having a crap reading year! Getting older, i.e. having read more and more, is certainly one reason why it takes so much more now than 10 years ago for a book to surprise & dazzle me. Also, there's a difference whether you read books for booktube (or goodreads), or just for your own pleasure & enjoyment. What I mean is, that you pick books for a different reason/pick different books when you just read for your own pleasure. And you read them differently as well. You don't think about points to make in a video or how many starts to give. Plus booktube and the star-rating system can have the tendency to dictate all your reading. My solution is that I don't talk about all the books I read on my channel. I think it's important to also have 'a private reading space', reading without thinking of how many stars to give etc. Does this make sense at all?
Britta Böhler I totally agree with you. I used to sort of feel guilty that I love romance books. They are predictable, trope-y and not well written. But they gave me joy and helped me de-stress. I for some reason always pressurizing myself to be reading complex works of literature that I could talk about and share/debate. This year I realised it's totally okay to read whatever you want as long as it gives you happiness. Mercedes actually it was when you replied to one of my comments about this guiltyness that helped me realise this. (Thank you) I can have varied reading tastes and not every book is something that needs to be worth talking about. It's also totally okay to take a break from reading for a while and do other things. I think perhaps having a booktube channel puts a lot of pressure on you to read a certain way or look at a book critically for review. But I hope you can cut yourself some slack, take a break from reading to get connected again with why you loved reading in the first place without any pressure :)
Sometimes it's good to be honest and reflect! I love how systematic you've been about this ;) I checked your TBR you own shelf, and there are only four books on there that I've read. But they are all books I loved! (Probably because we have very similar taste I think but I haven't read as much as you.) They are: Eat sweat play - Anna Kessel Another day in the death of America - Gary Young Signs preceding the end of the world - Yuri Herrera The vegetarian - Han Kang Out of the two non-fiction one's I would most recommend Gary Young's. It's a heartbreaking subject but it's quite wellcrafted, with reconstructed stories about the victims' lives and how they died, interspersed with some of the greater structural (political, cultural, economic) issues around gun violence in America. Anna Kessel's was a real girl power read, which made me want to exercise not for health reasons but because I am a badass feminist woman, so that's super valuable too ;) The two novels are both short and translated, and they match really well actually! Both about women who are in situations they don't want to be in... I thought they were both beautiful, and they shouldn't take much time at all so if you don't feel like commiting to a story for a long time, give them a try ;) Although the voices are quite strange, especially The Vegetarian might take a chapter or two to get into the story.
So I went through the GR shelf you mentioned, and there are a few books on there that I've read: The Vine That Ate the South by JD Wilkes - This is short enough to where you can finish it in a sitting or two. I enjoyed it, but I'm not sure if it'd be something you would also love. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde - a classic. Plus the prose is insanely beautiful. Middlemarch by George Eliot- One of my all-time favorite books. Not everyone likes it, but I ended up absolutely loving this. To me, though, this is a good book to read during the mid-late Spring. In the Night Garden by Catherynne M Valente - I've read nearly every single one of Valente's books (I have one poetry collection of hers I haven't yet read), and this series (The Orphan's Tales) is my absolute favorite of hers. And, honestly, I think you would really enjoy it, too. It's an adult book that centers around a young girl. The format of the book is like interwoven short stories. The writing is beautiful. It takes inspiration from many different parts of the world, especially non-Western folktales. They seem like big books, but I was completely hooked.
I’ve had the exact same problem this year. I picked up too many books I didn’t like or were just ok and that’s put me in an awful reading slump I can’t seem to pull myself out of.
Reading has become a job to you. I really believe that's what it is. Ifeel this way about plays/scripts. I read so so many of them and most of the time not for just pure enjoyment. I'm not as selective about my reading choices because I try to cover as much ground and reference as I can instead of reading plays simply because they seem interesting. Try not putting so much pressure on reading so many books and feeling like you have to do it.
I've watched your videos for a long time Mercedes and if you want my opinion I have noticed that you have moved towards more contemporary literature and less classics (modern or otherwise) which have been 'proof-read' for many many years. I'm so thankful to you for recommending East of Eden! And that sent me into a John Steinbeck read through. Have you tried more of his work? I have also noticed that my year has been more meh.. and I think it's because I have been trying other genres and books that other people recommend instead of going for what I trust (well beloved and tested books)
Valentina García I know what you mean Valentina. I’ve realised that I focus so much on newer books when I used to enjoy classics (especially modern classics) so much! I’m thinking that I may pick a couple up before the new year and hope they feel refreshing compared to all the newer books. I’ve also read of mice and men and the grapes of wrath by Steinbeck. I’d love to reread the grapes of wrath though as it’s been about 8 years since I read it and I think I’d get more out of it on a second read.
MercysBookishMusings Try Cannery Row, because you love nature so much I think you'll find the chapters where Steinbeck goes into full contemplative mode on the fauna and flora of the town specially flavorful. One of the characters is a marine Biologist! I hope my recommendation will be as good as your East of Eden was to me. Btw it's really short! So savor it!
I have just watched this again, now that there’s been so much discussion generated by it. What a valuable snapshot-in-time of a reading life! As for sorting through and whittling down your TBR of books you already own,I am going to gently, tentatively tag you on my Page 112 tag (I have a couple of these videos already up on my channel, and will be posting another one hopefully later today) because it might just be useful in that process, may possibly be a way of finding out which books spark your interest in the here and now. Happy reading and happy bailing!
After watching your videos about bailing and other people's videos about unhauling I've been inspired! I took about 60 books off my shelves a few days ago - lots of those were books that I'd read the first few pages of at some point and felt meh about them so it feels good to not have them waiting around!
It's a shame that you feel like that about reading however I think it's great that you have talked about it and it's ok to expect to really enjoy the majority of your books (especially if your time is more limited than before) Its sounds like you have had an unlucky run with your books this year. I had a quick look at your Goodreads shelves and would recommend Moonstone, The Gustav Sonata, A Line Made By Walking and The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks (I really enjoyed listening to the audio book) Also I just finished The Heart's Invisible Furies and loved it (not sure if you own this book, maybe you could pick up from library). Good luck with whatever you choose to read 📚😍
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I’ve felt this exact way for the past year and not wanted to publicly say that I didn’t like reading. BUT I’ve found that if I’m in a bad reading period in which I don’t feel like anything I read is good, I pick up a favourite of mine to reread which immediately sparks my joy for reading. I think that booktube makes us read so many books that we do become better at critiquing them, but also feel like a lot of what we read we’ve read before. Breaks from reading are important as well (even though I only end up needing a break of a few days). Anyway, this comment is all over the place but I’m kind of relieved to find out you feel the same way as I do!
Helene Jeppesen I find that when I’m in a slump I read poetry. Short, pick me ups that are often get me back into novels.
Even though I’d obviously rather you hadn’t experienced this I’m glad it’s not just me 😅 I think about two weeks is my max and then I start to feel a bit lost without reading and like my life has lost a driving force. That sounds extreme but that’s how it feels! I’m definitely going to reread more and try to stop the channel from dictating my reading so much. Fingers crossed we both have a better reading year in 2018!
Here area few words from the Mom in me.
First, you just started back to work full time. This takes enormous amounts of mental energy, (esp if it’s not “the job” that you always saw yourself doing). And, unfortunately, it gets harder as we mature in life to stay mentally focused beyond a typical work day. It’s okay to just be tired and checked out of your normal routine for a while. Re-read a few things you love as I saw a spark of job when you spoke about it. Reading shouldn’t feel like work, so be okay with letting your expectations fall by the wayside. If you’re concerned about channel content (which you certainly don’t HAVE to be) give us your fav re-reads!
Second, I get a sense of sadness or depression from you. Sorry if I’m butting in too much, but if you’re feeling down in other areas too, please get a physical. Something as simple as low iron or low Vit D can sap the enjoyment for normal things right out of you. Also world events are freaking depressing for lots of people these days and reading too much contextual info can add worry rather than just insight. So, just be sensitive to whether any book is sapping your joy in life and be okay with setting those aside for another time.
Okay, Mom talk over, Now go re-read something fun!!
Cheryl Holsonbake Hi Cheryl, thanks so much for your lovely, thoughtful comment. I think being back at work full time has certainly played its part. Work has been very stressful and I’ve been feeling a bit low in general so I think it’s all come to a head recently and resulted in a lack of enjoyment in the things I usually love. I’m hoping that next year will be an easier, brighter one and that my reading will be better as a response.
I was reading a rather bleak memoir that I’ve put aside for now as I don’t think it’s the right time for me to read it. Instead I’m going to pick up a favourite and reread and hope the comfort and familiarity helps cheer me up ☺️ xx
I love your mom talk! Those are good points about other life events taking their toll. I also agree about the reading. Rereading books always gets me out of a rut! But it should definitely be enjoyable, not work! :)
Cheryl, you give the mum advice I always wish I had.
I adore these chatty videos so much!!! I'm having a different problem (just physically not having time to read for pleasure versus reading for grad school) but I really found this relatable. I also don't want to read for the average ones, I want to find books that blow me away! If I were you I would give myself a break for the rest of the year, reading whatever you manage, and then jump on 2018 with a new invigoration!
I blame the statistics driven lifestyle. You're not meant to fuss over how many books you own, or have read, or own and haven't read. Ok, the last one might require some restraint, buy only what you will read immediately while your tbr shelf is getting manageable. But you're not meant to fuss over statistics. That's for every once in a while when you want to refocus yourself. Just live, focus on picking up what you get excited about, read or unread, goodreads be d... At least that's where I am concluding about my own dismal reading situation lately. For starters I think I'll hide from my view my stressful, enormous, oh-i-wish-i-had-already-read-those. They are only stressing me out. And I want to read them and I don't.
Desp K I agree. I think so much of the stress comes from my hyper awareness of my reading stats through booktube and goodreads. I’m going to make a real effort to really chill my reading brain out and allow everything to feel much more organic. Fingers crossed I manage it! Thanks for your comment ☺️
Desp K More like, buy books you HAVE read and enjoyed. The library is a great place to put that practice in use. Borrow books and if you love them, buy them. That's how I've been doing it.
Desp K wholeheartedly agree. I am seriously thinking of forgetting tbr lists and read on how my mood is. It’s more spontaneous.
rosedaline valetine I can tell this has been a trigger to some. I agree with getting books that you already love, however you had access to the text.
But I was thinking about the self-conciousness of reading habits and how that spoils the reading itself.
I don't have any answers. I just didn't have a good reading year either.
I really love Lala’s closet unhaul videos. I think it’s a fun way to get through books you’ve owned for awhile but haven’t read. Whenever I get stuck, I love getting excited about a new reading project. Sounds like you have a great plan! However you figure it all out, I hope you love reading again soon. Cheering for you from across the pond. 💕
Oh love, no crisis points please. I think we all have phases with reading and books, sometimes we can’t read enough, some times we don’t want to read anything. I also think we change and adapt as readers and what we like. Plus I think we have to read books we don’t love as much as others so we enjoy all the ones we love even more. I wonder if we find less books we REALLY love the older we get and the more we read. Maybe it’s just, sadly, a bad year for you reading wise this year. None of that’s probably helpful is it? Rubbish friend aren’t I? Ha.
I’m right with you girl!! I’ve also had a horrible reading year! There is only one book I’ve read all year that has stuck with me. I DNF’d a lot of books this year, and spent most of the summer and in to the fall in a huge slump. You’re not alone!!!
This video is SO real. I don't have any advice (I've been thinking about a lot of the same things recently so I'm in no position to suggest anything for other people), but I just identified a ton with a lot of this. Especially how you talked about the difference between the way you think about a book like The Clay Girl when you have a reviewing platform vs. when you just read it for yourself. That's a hard balance I've been struggling with a lot this year, and it's sort of a relief to hear someone else talk about it
I had a crappy reading year too! When I think back I have read almost nothing that would make it onto my "2017-favorites"-list. I think I need to get better at focusing on the really promising books, and actually get rid of the mediocre-looking ones. I think your thoughts seem really reasonable, like reading the book while you're excited about it. I'll take that into account when assembling my reading goals for 2018. It's nice to hear someone else share this feeling! :)
I noticed The Fox Woman is on your TBR and I think you'd really enjoy it. It's one of my favourite reads from this year :)
I’m so glad you made this video but I’m sorry for how you’re feeling, it’s frustrating. I can definitely relate, I feel like I’m losing my identity, which sounds dramatic. My friends know me as a reader but it’s like lately I’ve been collecting books instead of reading them. It seems like no book can hold my attention anymore. But I’m trying not to feel guilty about it and realize that it’s just a slump. Best wishes to you!
I think sharing this is really important. Often, when we define ourselves as readers, it can send us onto such a crisis when we aren’t enjoying it. I’ve been doing the majority of my reading in audio format recently and not wanting to actually look at the words. And even that has made me feel very strange! Take your time with getting back into the swing of things, your enjoyment will take a turn for the better. Making BookTube videos can definitely add to the pressure some times, but try not to let it overwhelm you. 💕
I read the Raqqa Diaries after you hauled it in a video. I loved it. It was one of those books that broke my heart, made me speechless, and infuriates with the lack of help from larger countries those people get.
I loved how frank and honest this was. I know exactly the feeling you are discussing here. I don’t know that I have had it over as extended a period of time as you have, but it has definitely existed during different times in my reading life. It is comforting to hear someone who reads as much as yourself admit similar feelings. I don’t have much in the way of advice unfortunately. But I had a nosey through your goodreads shelf and noticed Sour Heart by Jenny Zhang. I read and loved this recently and think it would be right up your alley. It features all young female protagonists and focuses on themes of class and cultural identity. The writing style is quite unique and beautiful. I hope your reading life takes a more positive turn! Best wishes 😊
highly appreciate your honesty! i have been fallen out of love with reading a bit but i am ok with it. i feel like it will always be an up and down anyway so it will come around x
i feel the exact same about rereading at the minute. it's quite comforting knowing that you'll actually enjoy something for once lol.
I started re-reading more this year and it has made me feel so great about reading. Whenever I find myself in a bit of a slump, I go back to a book I love and it gives me a boost. So I think that's a great idea!
I always appreciate your honesty. I feel like I've read a lot of disappointing things this year, too. I also recently was looking back at 2015 and thinking "wow, what a great year!" I read so many amazing things back to back and had no idea at the time what a treasure trove I'd discovered. I have read some pretty amazing things, too, but sometimes it does feel like a slog to find the really great stuff. I feel disillusioned about books and/or booktube every few months or so, and try to adjust to make things fun again. I hope you can find the joy in it, too :)
I've gone through years before where some type of entertainment (for one period it was novels, but I've had the same experience with comics, games, and right now with TV) is just not something I want to devote my free time to. I think of it as a natural phase and try not to worry about it. I can definitely see how being dedicated to a booktube video schedule must make you feel it that much more strongly about it though, since it forces you to look at numbers every week.
I like your new method for thinking about favourites. I know for myself the way I feel about a book is often tied to the moment, so making that context explicit like that sounds like a brilliant way of framing those reads.
I hope it doesn't end up adding too much stress to your life! :)
I know what you mean 100%. This year since I've stopped making videos too has taken a lot of pressure off of me to read as much as I normally might, and so I've spent more time watching movies and shows I would've normally neglected for reading instead. And even though I haven't had the most stellar reading year, there have been a few standout books that I've really loved because I've read less and focused on reading books that I'm genuinely excited about. But also I need to get better at DNFing haha cause I will still force my way through books I *think* I should like or finish but that I'm not, in the moment, enjoying. It's so silly. Looking at your TBR shelf, I think you should read In Order to Live, especially for Non-fiction November! It's incredible. Signs Preceding the End of the World is a great little novel too. Their Eyes Were Watching God is one of my favorite classics, and Furiously Happy will make you laugh and cry so when you need to feel all the feels that's a good one.
I firmly believe that pretty much everything in life comes in waves. You might not be reading great books right now and therefore be less passionate about reading, but that doesn't have to mean it's always going to be like this from now on. Maybe the books that are being written and published right now are just not completely your cup of tea? I feel like writing is also subject to certain fashions, so maybe your taste is just not "in" right now, but it'll come back. Doesn't mean you've failed as a reader or anything. In the meantime, there's so much other stuff you can enjoy!
The Sheep and the Wolf that’s such a good point about types of books being published around the same time. I’ve been thinking all year that I haven’t enjoyed being so focused on new releases but somehow I’ve not managed to stop it! I’m 100% going to change that going forward and reach for older books ☺️
It might just be me, but I feel like there's a lot of pressure within the booktube / book blogging community as well to stay on top of new releases, read ARCs and post reviews of books that aren't even out yet. And I mean, I get it, I participate in it sometimes and it can definitely be fun, but there's nothing wrong with going for a backlist book! I am like you in that I also used to reread a lot, but stopped doing that because there's so many new, exciting books that I also want to read, and there's simply not enough time. But I do find that when I start to feel "meh" about reading, it really helps to pick up an old favourite and enjoy the familiarity and nostalgia.
I can relate to this kind of feeling very much. But I want to thank-you for doing all the hard work and letting us know what the good books are. Your high standards have helped me in the journey to pick up books and certain knowing that there is a high chance I will love it. Also very proud of you to be honest on the situation and coming up with this video instead of painting the perfect bookish person. I highly appreciate that.
Recently, I was having the same thoughts about the excitement of picking what to read next, getting it from the bookstore or wherever and starting reading it on the way home or the same night. So, I agree. It's really worth trying to reduce the amount of books you own just to experience that again.
I had a bad reading year a few years ago, where I wasn't enjoying reading as much as I used to. It was such a heart break, like losing a friend, or a part of myself. My reading tastes were changing, my time available for reading was shrinking, and I was tougher to please. I ended up just pulling away from reading, ignoring my TBR shelves, and only reading things that really jumped out to me. It's totally ok to detach and stop for a bit. No rules or goals, just see what books fling themselves onto your lap.
I'm not a massive reader. But i've had the same feeling as you concerning films. I used to be a big film buff, but then started getting bored and uninterested in them a couple of years back. So Instead of watching films i started consuming other kinds of entertainment, which meant that I started watching a lot of theatre plays and performances instead, which I've never really done before - and I got really exited about that. The last couple of months though, I've started getting into films again, and I now appreciate film as a medium again. My point is I think it's natural to get a bit bogged down when you consume a lot of the same form of entertainment. And it's healthy and natural to try out new kinds 'entertainment', cause it makes you excited, and gives you a more nuanced perspective and appreciation of the different mediums. And then returning to the medium you originally loved is a bit like coming home again.
I've been in a very similar situation actually, and I've been watching tv/movies much more than reading because I'm sick of the pressure. I've had a lot of 3 star reads too and I think one 5 star book which is crazy (although a few 4.5 star reads so maybe I'm being too critical?). I've been planning a video for December to talk about my plans for 2018, but I'm the same in that I want to bring down the TBR. Glad I'm not the only one!
So I had a mostly three star reads year in 2016 and I was feeling so meh for a while, however this year it’s been mostly 4/5 star reads and it was literally a case of finding a specific genre that I was LOVING and not forcing myself to read other stuff on my shelf that I wasn’t feeling. Literally I’ve been buying books and reading them Immediately instead of reading stuff I’ve had for years which is bad for my TBR but has been great for my reading year.
Slow down on reading if that's what will make you happier. Don't burn yourself out. The joy will come
My advice. Go back and rate Clay Girl 5 stars - you really loved that when you read it. I remember the cosy reading night video. State its problems in the review if you must but embrace your love. The same goes for all your other loved/favourite books. I have books I loved that I dislike now but I loved them then and that was true. There are books I hated (school reads) that I love now but my hate was genuine then. Advantage of being middle aged is that you don't give a F what people think but embrace what brings you joy. Again only my 2 cents.
Maria Hill I know exactly what you mean! It’s more me overthinking it than worrying so much what others think though. I think reading so much and documenting it through the channel means I analyse my reading and who I am as a reader way more than an average reader. I agree that it’s important to be ok with loving a book even if you’re aware of its flaws. But for me a favourite book is one I loved and couldn’t criticise - which tends to be quite rare these days 😅
MercysBookishMusings Maybe if you view Books more like you view people it might help. You have people that you love, and “favorite people.” That doesn’t mean they’re perfect or that you’ll never criticize them. Look at books the same way. Love or favoritism doesn’t have to equal perfection or inability to find anything to critique. You can love them and still see a flaw. I know that sounds weird, but it helped me when I was in a really bad reading time. I stopped judging so harshly and trying to see the good where others saw it (or the bad.) When I took the pressure off of myself I enjoyed it a lot more. 😊😊
Tinahgirl83 i love that way of looking at books. And makes sense, since people make books haha.
That's lovely.
Tinahgirl83 that makes complete sense! Thank you so much for putting it so perfectly 💜
My 5 stars reads from the shelf you mentioned are Do Not Say We Have Nothing and The Hours, and I have one 4 stars read, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness. I really enjoyed them. Hope you find something amazing on your shelves. ;)
I'm sorry you're having a bad bookish year :( Hopefully this means that next year will be incredible!
Off your unread shelf, I highly recommend Such Small Hands by Andres Barba, it's quite short and terribly creepy. I also greatly enjoyed The Man with the Compound Eyes and think that seems up your alley. And A Single Man is one of my all-time favorites
Ok, I have not read a single book on your Goodreads tbr list. So I'm not much help at all but the two books from the list I'd personally be most excited to read would be "the Woman in White" and "Daphnis and Chloe".
I found one book on that goodreads shelf I want to hype - Sense and Sensibility. It's just as witty as other Jane Austens, and the sisters' bond is great. This book read very differently at 16 and at 23, and I guess it will change again. Good luck with culling. This video and Ariel Bissett's video on competitive reading has inspired me to cull my collection of unread books as well.
I just went through your Goodreads shelf, and here is what I have to recommend:
- Their Eyes Were Watching God (SUPER recommend based on your read books)
- The Picture of Dorian Gray
- Sense and Sensibility
- Do Not Say We Have Nothing (the first half is SO weak, but the second half is stellar)
The books I don't recommend from this shelf are:
- We Need New Names
- On the Road
I hope next year is better for you. I'm trying to focus more on my reading for next year.
Thank you for the honesty! I think I need to take a page out of your book re: ratings. I seem to round up my ratings, and on looking back at my year of books, some of the ratings I gave them were inaccurate. New Years Reso is to be more strict with my rating system.
In terms of books on your shelf, I see you have The Mother of All Questions: Further Feminisms - this one is rather short so it's an easy one to cross of your list before the New Year :)
I'm in some sort of slump too. Is it the time of year? It shouldn't be. It's prime cosy reading weather. I need to learn to dnf sooner. I don't think I've read a 5 star book this year. I often wonder if I'm overly critical. But mainly I need to waste less time on mediocre books. I haven't made a video for months either:( sigh. Hope things pick up for you too Mercedes x
Rereading is in my opinion quite helpful in times like that. I can totally understand what you mean about the excitement just fading away. I don't own a lot of unread books because that's what I am afraid of. And I like using the library more because if I stop being excited about a book I can just return it. :)
Thank you so much for posting this! I don't know if you've noticed, but I haven't posted in a few months. I haven't been reading, and I have just found myself doing other things. Sometimes I wish I was reading, and a book might sound good, but when I pick it up....it just automatically doesn't sound good, or I just don't feel like reading it after all. I feel as though I've become a lot more critical as well, and because of the same things you mentioned. Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels this way right now. :)
It's surprising how many people seem to feel the same way! I thinking having a channel certainly exacerbates the problem because it's an added pressure. I hope your reading picks up and I look forward to seeing your face in my subscriptions again when it does :)
I can really relate to this experience. I had something very similar about four years ago, where I found myself becoming incredibly cynical about the quality of the books I was reading. I only read 29 books all year and hardly liked any of them. I think it was partly about being on the new release treadmill for a long time before that, which is so untrustworthy, and partly, like you say, about approaching every book with an eye to how I was going to review it. I started to question myself really closely whenever I thought a book was good to guard against gushing about it. I also found that it was easier to believe my negative responses to a book than my positive ones. It's definitely one of the effects of living your reading life online and under the spotlight. I don't know what changed for me really, other than that I allowed myself to like books for different reasons and rate them for different reasons. There is so much dissonance on my Goodreads page now! Wolf Hall, my favourite book of all time, has 5 stars, but so does a period romance novel I read last year that really touched me. It still makes me wince a bit but I'm letting it stand because it was true to my experience at the time. I think going back and re-reading is a really good tactic to help rebalance, because it reminds you of what you love.
Thanks so much for your comment! Everything you had to say about reading in the public eye and reading books to review is exactly how I feel! The last few weeks I've been working really hard to shed all the silly bookish/channel rules I have and I've been feeling much more positive about my reading and excited about my channel :)
I have felt similar... my new way of book buying is to buy one for every two I read(although I am a slow reader) and read it straight away. It's working so far because I'm having less accumulate and losing the initial excitement. And feels like a little reward every time!
From the books you own but haven't read shelf my two favorites are the Vegetarian by Han Kang ( I read this book in one day and didn't stop thinking about it for weeks. This book sucks you in and you can't stop. It could be really good to get you back into reading.) and The Birds and Other Stories by Daphne Du Maurier ( love this much more than Rebecca. I feel it's kind of a weirdly cozy creepy book and I really enjoyed almost every story.)
This was really interesting. The other day I listened to one of your podcast episodes from earlier this year, when you were saying you've been reading a lot of new releases and haven't really been getting on with them. Perhaps it's that? I don't have a Booktube channel but I still feel a lot of pressure to have read all of the popular/classic books because I am considered by people to be A Reader. I always feel a bit bad if I'm not keeping up to date with new releases or if I haven't read the "classic" books that everyone knows about. This year I have been trying to read more of those kinds of books, and I've found I just haven't been enjoying them (for example, I just DNFed The God Of Small Things). Next year I'm not going to worry about reading books I feel like I should.
Pick up an all time favourite to end the year with. Anne of Green Gables, Harry Potter, or Roald Dahl always renew my spirits.
Hello,
Just to say I was feeling exactly like you last year and this year it has changed for me and I have felt a lot more enthusiasm for reading and really enjoyed a lot of the books I have read.
For me it was partly state of mind and partly,I just needed a bit of a break from reading.... Which is healthy. I also find personally that if I spend too much time on the internet I loose my concentration and enjoyment for reading..... That's just me though☺
As for the books on your to-read shelf on Good reads I can really recommend ' House of the Spirits' by Isabel Allende and also ' Prickle Moon' by Juliet Marillier . Infact , I have to say that if I am in a reading slump I always pick up a Juliet Marrilier as I love her writing so much. Good luck !!x
It sucks that you feel like this, but I can relate!! I've had a look at your Goodreads shelf and I have 3 recommendations for amazing books and 2 for ones I don't think are worth the time (obv subjective but may help?). Three faves: Wide Sargasso Sea, The House of the Spirits and Sense and Sensibility, two duds (for me): Ladies of Grace Adieu and The Rental Heart. I won't presume to give you any more advice, but I hope your love of reading comes back soon xxx
It wasn’t too negative. It was balanced and honest. And yay for re-reading. I never talk about my rereads but I love ‘em.
I’ve been feeling that way for months! I haven’t felt a true sense of enjoyment while reading a book in awhile. I don’t know if it’s the books or if it’s me. I’m going to keep trying though but with no pressure. I’ll DNF what it isn’t holding my attention, read when I feel like it,
The last few years for me were crappy reading years. I read like 86 books in 2012, 50 in 2013, 20 in 2014, 10 in 2015, 20 in 2016 and shot back up to (I’m currently on) Book 60 for this year. We know what it’s like, don’t beat yourself up too much - it happens to everyone!!
I really like the idea of reading a few books around a topic and then discussing them. I've become a big DNFer as well, and I think there's nothing wrong with that. Becoming more critical is a natural part of becoming older/wiser (I think), and so I really wouldn't worry. I really enjoy the honesty in your videos and reviews, so please don't go changing that. I'm only here to see your honest opinions!! In the words of America 'you do you'. Laura x
Hi Mercedes. I rarely watch a 20 minute video from start to finish (the typical attention span 😂) but I followed this from start to finish and entirely understand.
My advice: literally just reread favourites for however long you like. Sometimes I like to devote one month as a Reread Month so I just go back and hunt for old favourites. Often, if that happens, I feel like taking a step back from rereading after a while and that gives me the itch to read new stuff again. So that is what I say! :-)))
P.S. Middlemarch is on your Goodreads TBR. Probably not a great idea for a slump 😂 but it is one of my ultimate favourite books of all time.
Really appreciate the honesty and realness in this video - and I'm sorry your reading year hasn't been going so well. I glanced at your "own but haven't read" TBR, and I would say that you should absolutely read Their Eyes Were Watching God at some point - I read it in high school and college and just picked up a new copy of it because I want to do another re-read (and I normally never re-read!)...it's just incredible. I also think The Invisible Man is a great book that I wish more people would read. And lastly, I think I remember you not liking Jane Eyre too much, so I would say maybe give Wide Sargasso Sea a shot? It's pretty short and is a great response to/critique of Jane Eyre (both in terms of content/point of view and in terms of style).
For me no matter how bad something is I would never cancel my reading of it. I gain as a person through the good books and the bad books. The good tv shows and the bad. For everything good thing that helps me grow, there is a bad thing that achieves the same outcome. Good and bad make up my life and I would never take back a bad reading experience.
I would still appreciate a wrap up from the year! As long as you’re being honest and referencing this video and how you felt throughout the year, then I would really love your opinions :) even if there’s only two in the video!
My reading is most usually consisted of 3 star books, you havent fallen out of love with reading, its just that a lot of books are mediocre.
Jojo Jojo I don’t want to believe that but I know it’s true 😆 I just need to stop reading all the mediocre ones!
I think they serve a purpose, showing us what amazing books look like hehe
The last two months have been the worst for me. I have hardly read a thing, and what I do read I don't finish. I've failed at all the readathons and I think I felt very pressured to finish reading books from my TBRs. I also stopped posting on Instagram because I feel like I've lost my bookish spirit. I think I needed a break. Moving forward, my plan is to finish the library books I currently have out (if I can), and from that point forward I'm just going to read what I desire in that moment. No more TBRs! I need to get back to reading simply for the love of reading! (Not to accomplish something, or stay current, or read what everyone else is reading).
I've been in a similar position! I'm still reading a lot but with a lot of low ratings and I'm finding that the books that I'm loving are things that I wouldn't have even been interested in a year ago. It's strange but I think it comes from thinking critically about the books you read and just tastes changing. Maybe just go back to rereading some favourites? I pretty much exclusively use the library now and that makes dnfing so much easier!
You have the End of the Affair on your TBR. It's my all-time favorite book. It made me view and feel spirituality differently than before. Lathe of Heaven and Cat's Cradle, also on your TBR was 5-stars fun. I also own some books that I might set free soon, ala Marie Kondo's Konmari method.
That's the beauty of reading. Books affect people in different ways depending on where they are in their life. So please just do you, and enjoy the journey of reading whenever you feel like it. Love your channel.
Beth Colarusso thank you so much for your lovely comment ☺️
Re-reading sounds wonderful. Also, it is possible the books put out this year just aren’t that great and I think most books you chose to read this year were put out this year. A great read for any year is a lot to ask. Maybe read books that are older, more tried and true. Also, I am pretty sure we watch your channel to get your view point and saying, “yes, there were problems, but I don’t care” is okay - it’s your life, embrace the oddity of a full life.
Thank you so much for the video Mercedes! I love your channel and it always makes me excited to see that you posted another video. I just picked up the Essex Serpent from my library this weekend, based on your recommendation, and am loving it so far! Your effort is very much appreciated. I scrolled through your Goodreads but only found one title I recognized (On The Road) and I haven't personally read it yet.
Joe Bagiackas so glad to hear how much you’re enjoying The Essex Serpent!
I was feeling a bit like this around a year ago. The key for me was to stop giving star ratings on Good Reads. My thoughts on most books I read are way too complicated to rate out of 5, I'd rather just keep my thoughts stored in my head until I meet someone else who has also read it or get chatting to a bookseller in Waterstones! I realise it's not as easy for you to do that, but it might take some pressure off? I also enjoy going into a bookshop or a library and picking up a book I've never heard of and know nothing about. Sometimes seeing the same books everywhere makes me feel like reading them is a chore. Still not picked up The Essex Serpent although I'm sure I'll like it.
Every time you pick up a book it's a bit of a gamble ,you invest a bunch of your time no knowing if it'll pay off but you do it anyway for the chance that it might.There's a reason gambling is addictive for me discovering new stories is too)
Omg this is exactly how I feel this year. Most of my reads have been 3 or 2 stars. I think I figured out what my problem was though, Booktube. I was taking so many recommendations from other people online and not enjoying other people’s 5 Star reads or favourites. Not to say those books weren’t good books, they just weren’t for me. I guess I have different taste which is absolutely fine, an example would be the Tidal Zone which I really disliked but yet is one of so many others favourite book. I think once I take a step back and just carefully select books based on my personal taste and re-reading my favourites, I think my love for reading will slowly come back. But trying to read everybody else’s recommendations was the problem for me!
Im sorry to hear you are feeling this way Mercedes. I actually had a talk to a friend of mine the other day about favourite books and recommending them to people and I feel the same way you do. It can be difficult to do sometimes because you could love a book at a certain time of your life and it can be the thing you needed at the time and becomes a favourite but then may be something you may not like years later. My reading taste has definitely changed since I was in my early twenties and I love seeing how I have grown as a reader. My advice would be to take a day to yourself to go to the bookstore, pick up one book that appeals to you in that moment, go home and read it straight away. Have snacks and drinks ready for your day of reading 😊 I have done this myself one time when I was feeling the same as you where I was a bit meh about everything I had and it truly helped me to get out of that frame of mind. Hope this helps you xo
I've definitely been feeling this way this year as well! Looking back on all the books I've read this year, I only have a handful that I genuinely enjoyed or that I know will stick with me. I think, for me, I'm not a harsh enough DNFer because I'm kind of competitive and I feel like I need to finish everything I start, especially if I spent money on it. I also have a hard time unhauling books for the same reason.
This was such a good video because it's making me feel like I need to confront my own mediocre reading. Hope the rest of the year's reading goes well for you! :)
Okay I just had a look at your Goodreads shelf and here's the ones that I can encourage you to go for: The Ladies of Grace Adieu and Other Stories by Susanna Clarke (I love her writing!), Heap House by Edward Carey (SO much fun and the illustrations are absolutely wonderful.), Furiously Happy by Jenny Lawson (A true pick-me-up and hilarious (which duh).), & Do Not Say We Have Nothing by Madeleine Thien (You mentioned falling deep into Clay Girl and thinking about it when you weren't reading it? This book was the same for me.).
Good luck and just remember: If you're not interested, don't bother. Reading is above all supposed to be FUN. :-)
I've had burnt out periods with reading, sometimes lasting 6 weeks or so, where I don't pick up a book, don't watch booktube, don't go on goodreads etc. From analysing it, I know it's from spending too much time watching booktube, sitting on goodreads, reading reviews etc during the times that I am reading books. I know if I had a booktube channel, this would inflate those issues. I've worked out I have a limit to how much I can read each day, how much I can spend on bookish things like booktube, goodreads and so on. I'm learning from these things and hoping I can find a level at which my reading won't suffer.
I know what you mean, I recently had quite a big reading slump and couldn't understand why, because I was constantly thinking about wanting to read since I never stopped loving reading but I just was never in the "right mood". For me it was kind of a stressful period and a moment of "transition" in my life that felt smaller than it was in retrospective. When I relaxed and stopped being preoccupied with my reading things kinda went into place by themselves really. I know you have a channel and you feel pressure to bring content as well as wanting to enjoy the reading experience for yourself and maybe you are your own harshest (is that even a word?) judge but my advice is (and it's not ground-breaking at all) to really do what you feel. If you feel like not reading and instead watch tv just do that, nothing will take away your passion for books even if you abandon them for a little while. Having said so I checked your Goodreads shelf and I personally really enjoyed An Unrestored Woman, a beautifully written short story collection (and I don't particularly enjoy short stories usually), so definitely give it a go if it sounds nice to you! Whoa this was long. Hope you have a great evening! xx
I strongly believe in re-reading books, if it doesn’t stand up to a second read, then it wasn’t that good in the first place! I know you could be spending the time reading an unread book from your shelf but re-reading a book you love is like nothing else! I always use a re-read as a reset button for my reading, if I’ve not liked anything I’m reading or am feeling a bit ‘blah’ about reading in general and don’t feel inspired to read at all, an old favourite will always bring me round!
I'm so sorry you're not enjoying reading much right now. But, I can totally relate to what you said. I was slumpy over the summer. But all of a sudden, I'm loving everything I read. I really wish I knew why that is. I might do a response video. Anyway, the Compare Books feature on GoodReads made your task very simple. (Although, I thought you had read a couple of these.) So, here are the books from your shelf that I gave 4 or 5 stars.
Neon Green, An Unrestored Woman, The Faster I Walk The Smaller I Am, Signs Preceding the End of the World, The Tsar of Love and Techno, The One-in-a-Million Boy, and The Vegetarian.
I always feel this way when I read too many contemporary books. They just leave me feeling bored and down. I rarely read anything written post-2000. Maybe a good Victorian chunkster might help?
Just had a peep at your shelf and I really recommend Their Eyes Were Watching God! It's so moving but not soppy, it's really powerful in terms of characters and language, and it's a really important book too. Also, I second those on here who say you should give re-reading a go! I've been through phases where I was falling out with reading (or, more specifically, falling out with people's writing!) but then I've read or re-read something really really well-written and it's proven me wrong!
And if you're ever looking for something silly and fun, go for Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day! I wouldn't call it 'great literature' but it's very well-written anyway, and just enjoyable!
I second Their Eyes Were Watching God!
Oooh i love negative videos!! I find them so cathartic. I think it's good personally that you are more critical now. It probably means you won't waste as much time reading books you don't think are worth it. I don't care how many books you read in a month lol just as long as you are happy. Go and re-read as many books as you want if you'd rather do that. I love seeing people's thoughts after a re-read or just seeing that they've re-read something, let's me know they actually enjoyed that book or that there was something about it that makes them ponder over it and want to explore the book again. I appreciate you being so candid with us all about your feelings xoxo
I love this video. It's so honest. I have been in a reading slump about June / August. Weirdly, this video has inspired me to start reading again. Thanks so much for your honesty! If I can recommend two books on your unread and owned TBR they would be Birdie by Tracey Lindberg and My Brilliant Career by Sarah Marie Miles Franklin.
Birdie is kind of a non-linear magical realism novel told by a Cree woman, about women, it's about the different relationships women have with each other and it feels very cathartic and I love it.
My Brilliant Career by Sarah Marie Miles Franklin is a bit of a chunkier book and feels like a rough and ready Pride and Prejudice set in the Australian outback. Lots of feminist themes and about a young woman growing up poor and wanting to write. I didn't like the heroine at first, and then I loved her.
Hope this helps. Your video helped me.
Love how honest this video is! I made a similar video recently as I was feeling a bit lost in my reading life too! Xx
I totally get this I agree with your plan of action and I’m trying to do the same cull my massive unread books so I can get that exciting feeling back of reading something I’ve just bought
Also I work in a library and I think you start reading stuff that you think you “should read” and it’s just not a book that gives or fits your personal fuzzies
I'm sorry to hear this! Maybe you need a break as sometimes that can rekindle feelings! Or you could read a genre you've always loved to sort of coax you back into it?
I'm (slowly) climbing out of a reading slump that's lasted a good 5 years and what's been helping me, is reading comics/graphic novels or old favourites; something that's a quick read or familiar. Re-reading Harry Potter might help?
The most important thing is not to put too much pressure on yourself. If you don't feel like reading, allow yourself a break.
I feel like when I am pushing myself to get through a certain amount of books or if I have a set tbr pile, It sucks the fun out of reading for me. I stress myself out too much. I also have noticed that I also give lower ratings. Im thinking more about crossing a book off my list rather than enjoying what I am reading. *hugs* friend. Im hoping this gets better for you. Maybe re-read some of your favorites for a while or take a step back. Thats ok too.
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Tbh I think sometimes it's best to just allow yourself to take a break and come back when you miss something rather than forcing it into becoming a chore. Booktube has this strange tendency to create a pressure to rack up numbers or at least to be constantly reading, and that if you find yourself not reading for a week it's something to be guilty about. But it really is just reading, and like all interests we burn out or mentally wander off sometimes and it's not a personal failing or anyone else's business if you just decide to ignore books for the rest of the week, or the rest of the year. I think when we lilypad from book to book we often find a lot of them mediocre because we don't experience them at their best. They're just the 'NEXT!' in line of a never ending TBR and I feel that we appreciate each book less because we've got half an eye on just getting it finished so we can move on.
Just do what feels right, maybe take a break and just enjoy the Harry Potters for a bit and come back when you feel the itch for it again. Books aren't going anywhere :)
I feel the same way. I don't know if it's because I'm stressed and the books I read make it worse. Or if could be that if I read lighter fare, it doesn't hold my already fickle attention. Then it could be that I am simply overwhelmed at the sheer amount of books that I want to read, that I just don't pick up a book at all. I always have to take a break for self-evaluation.
I think in a way it's a sort of desensitization as well--at least when you have to read at a certain rate to be able to do booktube which is odd because I feel like the reason most booktubers get into booktube is BECAUSE we already read at a certain rate? I absolutely relate. It takes so much more for me to feel something about a book these days, moreso something positive.
Sometimes I just have to take a complete reading break. Don't open a book at all for a few weeks, focus on another hobby, see how I feel when I pick up a book again. When you're reading 100+ books a year, I think it's quite easy to get burnt out.
Thank you for being honest. I think most people go through periods where they question the way they approach books or their reading habits. I think you should take some time and reread some old favorites. I wish you happy reading in whatever you decide to do.
i go through the same. i pick up a book. it seems ok. i read 50 pages and then think "what's the point". it's boring. like eating carboard. so i go back to toni morrison.
so: it's not you, it's the books. :))
I imagine it’s hard for you to change your reading habits now that you have so many subscribers. It places a lot of pressure on you to read what’s popular and to read all the time. Some people below mentioned treating books as you would a friend. That seems very reasonable. If you enjoyed a book, give it 4 or 5 stars even if you had a few minor problems with the book. Reviews and wrap ups are the norm on booktube, but you could always do something different. Maybe you want to do certain things on your channel but you don’t know how it will be received. Since you’re in a reading slump, you should try doing those things now. I enjoy your channel Mercedes. I don’t read many books published by small independent presses. You’ve introduced me to some interesting sounding books in the past year that are not published by large publishers.
I've had the same feelings for the last year. And for me it was simply a rubbish year, not necessarily rubbish books. I don't even know what eventually got me out of it. I think it was just picking a book I was genuinely interested in and then make myself read like 5 or 10 minutes each day. I also buddy read a book and I think that helped too.
Just don't pressure yourself too much, because that definitely won't work. And if you feel like rereading a favourite; do so! If that could maybe get you back into reading and if you enjoy it, why do something else? ;)
This is such an interesting video, I loved it! I've had a similar experience this year; I've given so many books 3 stars and I don't really know why, but I do notice myself getting more and more critical, which is fine but not always fun, if you know what I mean. I'd actually be really interested in seeing you reread your favorites and talk about them though :) From your TBR, the only one I found that I've read and really enjoyed was The Man With The Compound Eyes, but it's kind of a weird book, so I feel like maybe it should be read when you're in the mood for it, so that's no help :P
So sorry to hear that you're having a crap reading year! Getting older, i.e. having read more and more, is certainly one reason why it takes so much more now than 10 years ago for a book to surprise & dazzle me. Also, there's a difference whether you read books for booktube (or goodreads), or just for your own pleasure & enjoyment. What I mean is, that you pick books for a different reason/pick different books when you just read for your own pleasure. And you read them differently as well. You don't think about points to make in a video or how many starts to give. Plus booktube and the star-rating system can have the tendency to dictate all your reading. My solution is that I don't talk about all the books I read on my channel. I think it's important to also have 'a private reading space', reading without thinking of how many stars to give etc. Does this make sense at all?
Britta Böhler
I totally agree with you. I used to sort of feel guilty that I love romance books. They are predictable, trope-y and not well written. But they gave me joy and helped me de-stress. I for some reason always pressurizing myself to be reading complex works of literature that I could talk about and share/debate.
This year I realised it's totally okay to read whatever you want as long as it gives you happiness. Mercedes actually it was when you replied to one of my comments about this guiltyness that helped me realise this. (Thank you) I can have varied reading tastes and not every book is something that needs to be worth talking about.
It's also totally okay to take a break from reading for a while and do other things. I think perhaps having a booktube channel puts a lot of pressure on you to read a certain way or look at a book critically for review. But I hope you can cut yourself some slack, take a break from reading to get connected again with why you loved reading in the first place without any pressure :)
HI FRIEND
Sometimes it's good to be honest and reflect! I love how systematic you've been about this ;) I checked your TBR you own shelf, and there are only four books on there that I've read. But they are all books I loved! (Probably because we have very similar taste I think but I haven't read as much as you.) They are:
Eat sweat play - Anna Kessel
Another day in the death of America - Gary Young
Signs preceding the end of the world - Yuri Herrera
The vegetarian - Han Kang
Out of the two non-fiction one's I would most recommend Gary Young's. It's a heartbreaking subject but it's quite wellcrafted, with reconstructed stories about the victims' lives and how they died, interspersed with some of the greater structural (political, cultural, economic) issues around gun violence in America. Anna Kessel's was a real girl power read, which made me want to exercise not for health reasons but because I am a badass feminist woman, so that's super valuable too ;)
The two novels are both short and translated, and they match really well actually! Both about women who are in situations they don't want to be in... I thought they were both beautiful, and they shouldn't take much time at all so if you don't feel like commiting to a story for a long time, give them a try ;) Although the voices are quite strange, especially The Vegetarian might take a chapter or two to get into the story.
So I went through the GR shelf you mentioned, and there are a few books on there that I've read:
The Vine That Ate the South by JD Wilkes - This is short enough to where you can finish it in a sitting or two. I enjoyed it, but I'm not sure if it'd be something you would also love.
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde - a classic. Plus the prose is insanely beautiful.
Middlemarch by George Eliot- One of my all-time favorite books. Not everyone likes it, but I ended up absolutely loving this. To me, though, this is a good book to read during the mid-late Spring.
In the Night Garden by Catherynne M Valente - I've read nearly every single one of Valente's books (I have one poetry collection of hers I haven't yet read), and this series (The Orphan's Tales) is my absolute favorite of hers. And, honestly, I think you would really enjoy it, too. It's an adult book that centers around a young girl. The format of the book is like interwoven short stories. The writing is beautiful. It takes inspiration from many different parts of the world, especially non-Western folktales. They seem like big books, but I was completely hooked.
waterfall of stars was so good!!
I’ve had the exact same problem this year. I picked up too many books I didn’t like or were just ok and that’s put me in an awful reading slump I can’t seem to pull myself out of.
I hope 2018 is a better reading year for both of us :)
Reading has become a job to you. I really believe that's what it is.
Ifeel this way about plays/scripts. I read so so many of them and most of the time not for just pure enjoyment. I'm not as selective about my reading choices because I try to cover as much ground and reference as I can instead of reading plays simply because they seem interesting. Try not putting so much pressure on reading so many books and feeling like you have to do it.
I've watched your videos for a long time Mercedes and if you want my opinion I have noticed that you have moved towards more contemporary literature and less classics (modern or otherwise) which have been 'proof-read' for many many years. I'm so thankful to you for recommending East of Eden! And that sent me into a John Steinbeck read through. Have you tried more of his work?
I have also noticed that my year has been more meh.. and I think it's because I have been trying other genres and books that other people recommend instead of going for what I trust (well beloved and tested books)
Valentina García I know what you mean Valentina. I’ve realised that I focus so much on newer books when I used to enjoy classics (especially modern classics) so much! I’m thinking that I may pick a couple up before the new year and hope they feel refreshing compared to all the newer books.
I’ve also read of mice and men and the grapes of wrath by Steinbeck. I’d love to reread the grapes of wrath though as it’s been about 8 years since I read it and I think I’d get more out of it on a second read.
MercysBookishMusings Try Cannery Row, because you love nature so much I think you'll find the chapters where Steinbeck goes into full contemplative mode on the fauna and flora of the town specially flavorful. One of the characters is a marine Biologist! I hope my recommendation will be as good as your East of Eden was to me. Btw it's really short! So savor it!
I have just watched this again, now that there’s been so much discussion generated by it. What a valuable snapshot-in-time of a reading life! As for sorting through and whittling down your TBR of books you already own,I am going to gently, tentatively tag you on my Page 112 tag (I have a couple of these videos already up on my channel, and will be posting another one hopefully later today) because it might just be useful in that process, may possibly be a way of finding out which books spark your interest in the here and now. Happy reading and happy bailing!
After watching your videos about bailing and other people's videos about unhauling I've been inspired! I took about 60 books off my shelves a few days ago - lots of those were books that I'd read the first few pages of at some point and felt meh about them so it feels good to not have them waiting around!
It's a shame that you feel like that about reading however I think it's great that you have talked about it and it's ok to expect to really enjoy the majority of your books (especially if your time is more limited than before) Its sounds like you have had an unlucky run with your books this year. I had a quick look at your Goodreads shelves and would recommend Moonstone, The Gustav Sonata, A Line Made By Walking and The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks (I really enjoyed listening to the audio book) Also I just finished The Heart's Invisible Furies and loved it (not sure if you own this book, maybe you could pick up from library). Good luck with whatever you choose to read 📚😍