Yes!!! Then turns into cheating, to me himself feel better, then turns into different forms of abuse, then turns into blocking paths and opportunities for you so you don't flourish ans be great. Broke insecure men are a big no. Building with a man is a huge no.
You are literally describing my ex boyfriend you'd swear they are twins. It's only been a few days since I left him and you are getting me through the worst part of this breakup.
@@lungileringani2693 you've made one of the best decisions in your life! Focus on yourself and the right man who exudes confidence and works hard will pursue you!❤
And there are many many married women out there who are in the same situation🥲paying cars they don’t drive, expensive houses, school fees all while taking care of the kids and the husband takes all the credit.
My question in this case is what is their husband there for kanti? For decoration? Do we as women not expect ANYTHING from amadoda? Meaning women do all the heavy lifting while the man lives his best life? Hayi enkosi, ndiyabonga😢
If I ever get blessed with a Girl child. As soon as she becomes a teenager/young adult, I'm referring her to this channel. Thank you for sharing your life experiences with us Ninja. Your channel has grown to become more educational, sooo informative and this information you share here will forever be relevant even in the next generation to come.❤
This thing of using your past /background as a excuse being a shitty human being is OUT!! It's started with my parents then friends to partners, NOW I DON'T TOLERATE such excuses. Be an adaptable human being, make conscious decisions to be a better being. Don't let your past define whom you are nor an excuse to not account, apologies and correct your character
True, R300 for funeral contribution, 200 for petrol, 150 for child's cake etc... I don't play with my money. As soon as this happen, i check out and ask them who was helping him before i came along. I lose all respect for such a man, sies.
Indoda must provide, even if I make more than him. Ofcause I'll probably do more, but as long as he's giving his all it makes a huge difference because he knows his difference makes me happy.
I nearly dated a narcissist luckily I saw the red flags quite early, Narcissist are never satisfied and they will always make you feel guilty if you don't give into their tactics or tricks.
I fully understand you because I have experience myself. Those who have never been in a situation will just open their mouths and say a lot of nothing. I agree with everything you are saying, I watched last week's video as well and after that I went straight to Promise's channel to watch him and I couldn't even finish it cos I know emotional and financial abusers, they are very good people in public, always victims. If I'm biased, I'd rather, but I believe you!
Yes I got to drive it but it was simply because it chowed a lot of fuel and he traveled a much longer distance to work than me. Then the cars were switched
@@mantombimthembu103 I hope you recover and I am sure you know now that you need to listen to that voice that said "No" but it's not just you sibaningi sisi.
Hyo sisi, in my case, my ex partner was so insecure, and he was in a management position in his work and act like he has nothing, and make feel guilty for the R15000 I was earning, in my job and I would finance him cause I wanted peace between us, am now at a better space on my own, Thank God🙏
We are taking notes since your divorce series theres so many nuggets you have dropped. Im glad you staying on course and sharing even when people think you arw bashing. You cant help that people know the actual man you were with. Because would they care so much if he was nevwr on your platform ?
I am now grateful for my boyfriend shem. I was always pushing to assist him and his pride never allowed, he always told me that i shouldn't try to be a man in a relationship. So from now on i will not fight him, i will let him he the man , the provider. Thank You Owamie♥️
Iyohhhhhh Owami You're spot on. Im a glammy who went through it all but im currently very much at peace and happy because i choose me in every aspect of living.
Keep these videos coming Ninja, it is true when they say that experience is the best teacher. As women, we often think we are immune from such kind of treatment until we realize that some men have lived their entire lives manipulating women. I am learning so much from your videos. I agree with you, insecure men never take accountability for anything, it is always someone's fault that they are broke, not even trying to make a living. They will blame the absence of their father, or mother not being rich, just anything but taking accountability.
The manipulation to do things for these insecure, lazy men is so subtle that when you look back, you start making excuses for him like “but he didn’t actually ask me for money, I just volunteered” yoh we’ve seen it all.
When I would call out my mom ex, he would say that it means I am not a giver. If I want him to reciprocate or pay me back, then I’m not a giver. That question stopped the day I asked him what he gives me or has ever given me! There was silence! And that statement was never uttered again! Thank God he is part of my past! Definitely not my future!
You should make a video where you completely speak about yourself with him as a victim, for mutual accountability purposes- that would be an interesting video to watch for people to understand codependency from your own insecurities as well.
I wish i can share with my team ,eish the ladies that im working with they provide for their man .One of them even stay in her family house with the guy's whole family. When you try to discourage the behaviour they say thats the reason im single 🤣🤣
My ex showed me flames! Totally agree with you Ninja... My now husband is what I needed shem I am so glad that I took a 360 degrees ngashay i corner nge speed😂 I couldn't deal with machidzo, manipulator and narcissist!
Insightful vids. If you are open to,would you please make a video on when you realised(even in retrospect) that he was insecure about the finances/you succeeding? Like when you met and you were still in nursing were the insecurities already showing(youve shared that even then the irresponsible financial behaviour was there)?Was he less insecure that time you left varsity&were not working then started selling by the road(and the call centre work era) and he was the one working&financially carrying the family(before the youtube days)?was he happier and needed less assurance then since he was the breadwinner? Or the insecurities and manipulation has been constant nomatter what financial position you guys had found yourself in? It seems the poor financial decision making from his side was constant but Im curious as to whether the insecurity was only when you were making more money or if it was also constant.
Kare I bought each and every clothing for my daughter... I'd get home with her and you know parents or siblings normally compliment the child, my daughter would say, my mommy bought me. She would be told not to say that, and be told to say her dad bought it.... Mind you, I didn't even tell my daughter to say that. A child can see who comes from work with plastics or "nice things".
There is a common saying that "men are the head of African households and should be respected as such." However, there's also a prevailing idea that "your husband is your first child." It feels contradictory to treat someone as the leader while also treating them like a child. If he still requires constant guidance and support, perhaps he should turn to his mother for that, rather than his spouse.🤷♀ Secondly there's nothing worse than a man who is jealous of you, let alone insecure within himself. He will forever make comments diminishing you, your achievements, your dreams all while doing absolutely nothing to better himself.
I SO SO SOOOOOO WISH that this video can be turned to a record so that it can be played on all Radio stations for EVERY PERSON TO HEAR IT because WoW it makes so much sense honestly ‼️
Unjani Queen Ninja....You story is relatable. I bought a BMW 118i in 2011 and I gave to my ex. He was bragging that it was him. His family started to hate me. Because they thought I was eating his money. Please share your story. They are lot of women and young who needs these life lessons without making the mistakes we made. He was cheating on me with my car 🚗.
Just yesterday we were laughing about men who use the void of not having a mom or men who are mommies boys. Guys it’s not FUNNY shame. The only reason why Ruth opened her legs so quickly on the ULTIMATUM is because Nolly told her the story of not having a mom etc… I’m not saying all men who lost their moms do that. But the level of MANIPULATION Nolla uses even on Lebo. Every minute nje, Lebo will say “ ow, I’m so shy and insecure.” Behind the scene i can 10000% bet that Nolla is the reason why Lebo always sees herself as ugly and she feels like she can never find another men. That time his sleeping around with different girls, left right and centre. Yhooo insecure man are the WORST. You’ll walk around OVER COMPENSATING for all his mistakes. ALWAYS VICTIMS ‼️
He was constantly blaming his mamkhulu for abusing him. They never take a stand to attend therapy. I suggested therapy too and even got one for us. He blatantly said he can't be counseled by a woman. He wants a male therapist. Ok the therapist didn't take any offence. A male therapist was then organized. He was coming up with all sorts of excuses not to attend the sessions. Worse part is that he is a govt employee and has a free therapy benefit from work and on top of it all he has medical aid. But I took the initiative to organize therapy sessions at work. But dololo
Been there, thank God he rescued me and I was obidient, I managed to leave after a year. The part where its like you are his mom and always have to worry about him as if he didn't have a life before😅. Shame being in love with insecure men is not for the faint hearted.
Been following you for a while now. I think you're talking to me. I am a young adult, in a situation almost similar to yours I won't lie I was willing to go through the route you did but now I see what will happen to me in a few years from now. I am commenting this to give me strength to leave, I hope I will come back here with an update soon
My baby daddy was also scammed bcz of tht gold shit Yho tht time I was in hospital with a 1 day old child who had nothing I mean nothing and the gold ppl took all the money we had saved for the baby yho bandla amadoda!!!!
When I meet a person, i make sure they know that I'm not giving a man my money ever. I tell them my father was a provider, my brothers are providers, Ask again, where's the pride when a man asks money from a woman mara yeh🤔
All I can say in insecurity, breeds jealousy then turns to narcissistic behavior. My opinion
Yes!!! Then turns into cheating, to me himself feel better, then turns into different forms of abuse, then turns into blocking paths and opportunities for you so you don't flourish ans be great. Broke insecure men are a big no. Building with a man is a huge no.
The both of you are spot on !
Notification gang🎉🎉🎉🎉
True story
@@Vv-fl2rmwow 😂 who hurt you. You know men really well.
You are literally describing my ex boyfriend you'd swear they are twins. It's only been a few days since I left him and you are getting me through the worst part of this breakup.
❤
@@lungileringani2693 you've made one of the best decisions in your life! Focus on yourself and the right man who exudes confidence and works hard will pursue you!❤
sending you virtual hugs 🤗
He will try to come back, don't take him.
“I’d rather stay in a back room” yoh ha.a insecure men are a weapon formed against us😭
And there are many many married women out there who are in the same situation🥲paying cars they don’t drive, expensive houses, school fees all while taking care of the kids and the husband takes all the credit.
Many sana! 😂These ppl are jokes. They even married themself! Ninja is not the only one and the sad part is they hate her for speaking out her truth.
My question in this case is what is their husband there for kanti? For decoration? Do we as women not expect ANYTHING from amadoda? Meaning women do all the heavy lifting while the man lives his best life? Hayi enkosi, ndiyabonga😢
If I ever get blessed with a Girl child. As soon as she becomes a teenager/young adult, I'm referring her to this channel. Thank you for sharing your life experiences with us Ninja. Your channel has grown to become more educational, sooo informative and this information you share here will forever be relevant even in the next generation to come.❤
"when you are in the situation YOU DO NOT SEE"
Extremely true, these women have been conditioned
Owamie, everything that you have spoken about also reminds me of my black tax situation with my family. It’s financial abuse.
Love how you always take your tears and turn them into a bag. Muphando❤🎉
The make up and hair,background and video quality 👏🏾👌🏾
This thing of using your past /background as a excuse being a shitty human being is OUT!!
It's started with my parents then friends to partners, NOW I DON'T TOLERATE such excuses.
Be an adaptable human being, make conscious decisions to be a better being. Don't let your past define whom you are nor an excuse to not account, apologies and correct your character
Girl your make up is giving 🔥 💅 this is the make up I wanna do when I break up with the insecure man that did me dirty
The cheating was a blessing in disguise. It saved you.
@@ThandiKhalaki so true
It starts from small things like airtime and taxi fare train them from there don’t play with money women
True, R300 for funeral contribution, 200 for petrol, 150 for child's cake etc... I don't play with my money. As soon as this happen, i check out and ask them who was helping him before i came along. I lose all respect for such a man, sies.
Indoda must provide, even if I make more than him. Ofcause I'll probably do more, but as long as he's giving his all it makes a huge difference because he knows his difference makes me happy.
The point about broke vs poor is too powerful. I don't date both these groups. Nibe-safe ladies ❤
😂❤
Then remain single
@@Thatsong-fr9nq😂😂😂😂😂😂am gwg on 3years now😂😂😂😂
I nearly dated a narcissist luckily I saw the red flags quite early, Narcissist are never satisfied and they will always make you feel guilty if you don't give into their tactics or tricks.
I fully understand you because I have experience myself. Those who have never been in a situation will just open their mouths and say a lot of nothing. I agree with everything you are saying, I watched last week's video as well and after that I went straight to Promise's channel to watch him and I couldn't even finish it cos I know emotional and financial abusers, they are very good people in public, always victims. If I'm biased, I'd rather, but I believe you!
I believe her too!
Knowledge, for free?! Dankie, Owami.
You are 10000% correct! AN Insecure man will drain you at all levels.The constant validation and apologizing for nothing is exhausting!
All I'm saying is that I bought him a Land Rover Discovery 3 while I'm driving Getz 😢 how I also don't know but it's only making sense now
Do you at least drive it 😢 the Rover?
Yoh😮
Yes I got to drive it but it was simply because it chowed a lot of fuel and he traveled a much longer distance to work than me. Then the cars were switched
@@mantombimthembu103 I hope you recover and I am sure you know now that you need to listen to that voice that said "No" but it's not just you sibaningi sisi.
They charm us with the cars you buy for them my queen 😂
I love that set up Owamie....it looks super neat and classy
Hyo sisi, in my case, my ex partner was so insecure, and he was in a management position in his work and act like he has nothing, and make feel guilty for the R15000 I was earning, in my job and I would finance him cause I wanted peace between us, am now at a better space on my own, Thank God🙏
That was a sugar baby, a slay queen
Nagana fela.
We are taking notes since your divorce series theres so many nuggets you have dropped. Im glad you staying on course and sharing even when people think you arw bashing. You cant help that people know the actual man you were with. Because would they care so much if he was nevwr on your platform ?
I am now grateful for my boyfriend shem. I was always pushing to assist him and his pride never allowed, he always told me that i shouldn't try to be a man in a relationship. So from now on i will not fight him, i will let him he the man , the provider. Thank You Owamie♥️
You have a provider there sis. Be very grateful for him. My man is also that
Iyohhhhhh Owami
You're spot on. Im a glammy who went through it all but im currently very much at peace and happy because i choose me in every aspect of living.
Wena Owamie you are not designed for small boys 🎉😍
You're beautiful Owami. The glow is on Another level.
Yoh today Owamie I heard you ,I will archive this, this is golden info to share from generation to generation.
I definitely agree with u Owami u will never change a insecure man
Chileeeee I see the improvements the brand is branding! BO👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾
🤣💦🤣💦🤣💦not Owami impersonating the ex!
Yhoo. Queen Ninja is spitting fire! We live and learn and NEVER do it again!
Not me writing notes😭😭😭
When you are a women who knows that you want to be great.Stay away from poor man😭😭
Iyo Sis ,you were Bob the builder.
"I missed you so much" 😂😂😂😂yhooo I would laugh so hard
Lmao 😂💀... Hai kubi😂
An insecure man is not a man at all! 🙌🏾
Keep these videos coming Ninja, it is true when they say that experience is the best teacher. As women, we often think we are immune from such kind of treatment until we realize that some men have lived their entire lives manipulating women. I am learning so much from your videos. I agree with you, insecure men never take accountability for anything, it is always someone's fault that they are broke, not even trying to make a living. They will blame the absence of their father, or mother not being rich, just anything but taking accountability.
It's unfortunate that he lost you, he will LEARN to appreciate a good wife.
I love the setup,it's elegant,the white nuances and the background lighting are creating a very classy setup ,hope you consider maintaining it
"When he's done, he goes and sleeps".. The way I burst out laughing.. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤭🤭🤭🤭
I wish TH-cam had a voice recorder. This was once me Owami 😭🤣🤣🤣😂😂🤣
Tjeeeer! I have so much to say. I hope she sees this. So that we can send voice recordings for him to play on an topic
The manipulation to do things for these insecure, lazy men is so subtle that when you look back, you start making excuses for him like “but he didn’t actually ask me for money, I just volunteered” yoh we’ve seen it all.
It's very subtle. And they are bold enough to say that they never asked you. Which means they are very aware that they are abusing you.
You will be fine, I am glad you are waking up.
When I would call out my mom ex, he would say that it means I am not a giver. If I want him to reciprocate or pay me back, then I’m not a giver. That question stopped the day I asked him what he gives me or has ever given me! There was silence! And that statement was never uttered again!
Thank God he is part of my past! Definitely not my future!
Stealing time to watch because I’m loyal like that 😂❤❤❤
Owami u have just spoken abt my husband aay
Stay safe girl
You were heavily gaslighted my sister. Yooh. I am learning
Yho owamie feels like your talking about my father, my mother has been through so much. Thank you for sharing ❤️❤️❤️
Honey, your make up is on point!! ..Loving these topics Queen!
“As a man why don’t you have pride “ that part 👏🏿
Thank you for talking about this,we are learning ❤️
We all know had 'stupid' relationships owamie 😂 mine was not about money but distance 😂
Mine was staying while he was cheating. When I think about it okare nka loma stapler😬
@@Letstalkaboutit2323😭🤣😂
All this while I thought your husband was the provider 😂 kanti uwe
Women should avoid being with a man who earns below them.
😂😂😂😂
I am new here and i am glad i found you, where do i put my bags because i am here to stay
You should make a video where you completely speak about yourself with him as a victim, for mutual accountability purposes- that would be an interesting video to watch for people to understand codependency from your own insecurities as well.
He can do the that himself when he goes on channels! Owamie owns up to her part in these videos. How is she supposed to speak from his perspective!
Hi but that is his story to tell as he was at the receiving end.He'd tell it better !!
Y'all try so hard to humble people on their platforms😮
I wish i can share with my team ,eish the ladies that im working with they provide for their man .One of them even stay in her family house with the guy's whole family. When you try to discourage the behaviour they say thats the reason im single 🤣🤣
the last line😂😂😂😂😂😂
I saw the video and i got out of bed right away....
Honestly… you look really good. The make-up. 🔥 🔥 🔥
Thank you for your wise words Queen ❤ much appreciated.🙏
You so beautiful Ninja! Watching your beauty growth/transformation is testament that when you put yourself first, you will just be beautiful 🥰
My ex showed me flames! Totally agree with you Ninja... My now husband is what I needed shem I am so glad that I took a 360 degrees ngashay i corner nge speed😂 I couldn't deal with machidzo, manipulator and narcissist!
What a lesson hey u go Ninja ❤ ❤ ❤ we are learning
Thank u so much for always talking about things that nobody talks about ..u are really a true inspiration yo us as young woman ..thank u
these talks are sobering❤❤❤keep up great work Owamie❤❤❤
I can't this because I'm in the office, but yoh, your thumbnail is so tempting 😭
Insightful vids.
If you are open to,would you please make a video on when you realised(even in retrospect) that he was insecure about the finances/you succeeding?
Like when you met and you were still in nursing were the insecurities already showing(youve shared that even then the irresponsible financial behaviour was there)?Was he less insecure that time you left varsity&were not working then started selling by the road(and the call centre work era) and he was the one working&financially carrying the family(before the youtube days)?was he happier and needed less assurance then since he was the breadwinner? Or the insecurities and manipulation has been constant nomatter what financial position you guys had found yourself in?
It seems the poor financial decision making from his side was constant but Im curious as to whether the insecurity was only when you were making more money or if it was also constant.
Kare I bought each and every clothing for my daughter... I'd get home with her and you know parents or siblings normally compliment the child, my daughter would say, my mommy bought me. She would be told not to say that, and be told to say her dad bought it.... Mind you, I didn't even tell my daughter to say that. A child can see who comes from work with plastics or "nice things".
Why dad if Mom bought them?
Yoh Owamie ! Imagine if you had quit to accomodate him 😂
Another personal story time 😍??? You are spoiling us!! ❤🎉🎉🎉
This is real content 🙌 👌
There is a common saying that "men are the head of African households and should be respected as such." However, there's also a prevailing idea that "your husband is your first child." It feels contradictory to treat someone as the leader while also treating them like a child. If he still requires constant guidance and support, perhaps he should turn to his mother for that, rather than his spouse.🤷♀
Secondly there's nothing worse than a man who is jealous of you, let alone insecure within himself. He will forever make comments diminishing you, your achievements, your dreams all while doing absolutely nothing to better himself.
🎯
We are spoilt ❤❤ Thanks for sharing your story
I SO SO SOOOOOO WISH that this video can be turned to a record so that it can be played on all Radio stations for EVERY PERSON TO HEAR IT because WoW it makes so much sense honestly ‼️
Unjani Queen Ninja....You story is relatable. I bought a BMW 118i in 2011 and I gave to my ex. He was bragging that it was him. His family started to hate me. Because they thought I was eating his money. Please share your story. They are lot of women and young who needs these life lessons without making the mistakes we made. He was cheating on me with my car 🚗.
Just yesterday we were laughing about men who use the void of not having a mom or men who are mommies boys.
Guys it’s not FUNNY shame. The only reason why Ruth opened her legs so quickly on the ULTIMATUM is because Nolly told her the story of not having a mom etc… I’m not saying all men who lost their moms do that. But the level of MANIPULATION Nolla uses even on Lebo. Every minute nje, Lebo will say “ ow, I’m so shy and insecure.”
Behind the scene i can 10000% bet that Nolla is the reason why Lebo always sees herself as ugly and she feels like she can never find another men.
That time his sleeping around with different girls, left right and centre.
Yhooo insecure man are the WORST. You’ll walk around OVER COMPENSATING for all his mistakes.
ALWAYS VICTIMS ‼️
FACTS!
Wow 🤩 can’t decide which background I love best! But this one… I am in love love!
I always watch all the ads 😊
Haven't watched you in a while, cant help but notice the glow. you look beautiful sis
Thank you for sharing. We are learning. ❤❤
Off topic real quick, I would like to know your opinion on the ultimatum South Africa 🤭
That’s why I am really looking at joining the 4B movement yazi we do so much better without man
He was constantly blaming his mamkhulu for abusing him. They never take a stand to attend therapy. I suggested therapy too and even got one for us. He blatantly said he can't be counseled by a woman. He wants a male therapist. Ok the therapist didn't take any offence. A male therapist was then organized. He was coming up with all sorts of excuses not to attend the sessions. Worse part is that he is a govt employee and has a free therapy benefit from work and on top of it all he has medical aid. But I took the initiative to organize therapy sessions at work. But dololo
keep teaching us sesi.love you
This educational story times are tea ❤❤❤😂😂😂😂
I'm so glad that I've watched this content thank you Owamie❤
We are going through a lot as woman.
Been there, thank God he rescued me and I was obidient, I managed to leave after a year. The part where its like you are his mom and always have to worry about him as if he didn't have a life before😅. Shame being in love with insecure men is not for the faint hearted.
Owamie thank you for your honesty you are one of the few. I give you your flowers please continue to share this truths
Been following you for a while now. I think you're talking to me. I am a young adult, in a situation almost similar to yours I won't lie I was willing to go through the route you did but now I see what will happen to me in a few years from now. I am commenting this to give me strength to leave, I hope I will come back here with an update soon
We bought a house I didn't want. In the process , we took an additional loan to pay off his car loan😭
Girl there many many women in your situation 😢, I hope you recover from this.
Thank ninja ❤We learning
My baby daddy was also scammed bcz of tht gold shit Yho tht time I was in hospital with a 1 day old child who had nothing I mean nothing and the gold ppl took all the money we had saved for the baby yho bandla amadoda!!!!
The quality of the video is to tier ❤
Owamie you look great, love the makeup.
I love the quality of the visuals ❤️
The SUV and Picanto part😢 that was my mom
😪😪😪
I know a couple where the wife brings in the big bucks and they are happy it's beautiful to see.
So he kept all the money? Your money and his own salary?😭😭😭. I'd scream!
I swear narcissists literally exhibit the EXACT same behaviours because it's like Owamie is talking about my ex husband 😳😳🙆🏾♀️🙆🏾♀️
Thank you for sharing ninja
Love Love The look again , your make up its on another level, i wish i could learn too
The studio 👌👌👌👌❤❤❤❤❤beautiful
When I meet a person, i make sure they know that I'm not giving a man my money ever. I tell them my father was a provider, my brothers are providers,
Ask again, where's the pride when a man asks money from a woman mara yeh🤔
You are not wrong. 💯