14:00 just had to stop and comment that I was also very moved by this essay and wowed by the depth & quality in Cassidy’s essay! Incredibly polished essay showcasing dozens of values and strengths in a well-rounded, well-developed young woman who will undoubtedly do great things in the world. Best wishes, Cassidy! If Stanford doesn’t love and want you after reading this essay, it will definitely be their loss! ❤
P.S. I had the same experience of noticing a value or strength, then hearing her explicitly claim that same value of strength later in the essay. Sometimes it happened in reverse, where she claimed the value or strength with one part of the story, and it was reinforced by another part of the story later on without being restated. I imagine this showing AND telling could make an essay really stand out from the stack of essays any one admissions staffer will read.
14:00 just had to stop and comment that I was also very moved by this essay and wowed by the depth & quality in Cassidy’s essay! Incredibly polished essay showcasing dozens of values and strengths in a well-rounded, well-developed young woman who will undoubtedly do great things in the world. Best wishes, Cassidy! If Stanford doesn’t love and want you after reading this essay, it will definitely be their loss! ❤
P.S. I had the same experience of noticing a value or strength, then hearing her explicitly claim that same value of strength later in the essay. Sometimes it happened in reverse, where she claimed the value or strength with one part of the story, and it was reinforced by another part of the story later on without being restated.
I imagine this showing AND telling could make an essay really stand out from the stack of essays any one admissions staffer will read.
Well said! Thank you for sharing!
my essay is shit compared to this 🥲
You still have time. Keep writing.