What a girl should be: a video essay on The Virgin Suicides

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 17 พ.ย. 2024

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  • @dahliabrito9949
    @dahliabrito9949 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7631

    I completely agree with with you , when people say that the boys loved the girls I never believed that because they didn’t know them, they were in love with the idea of them

    • @itheuserfirst3186
      @itheuserfirst3186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +67

      I think what you are referring to is a thing called "attraction."

    • @--BACKTFUP
      @--BACKTFUP 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Infuriation

    • @apinchofdisappointment
      @apinchofdisappointment 3 ปีที่แล้ว +123

      Infatuation

    • @addisonb.1356
      @addisonb.1356 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

      @@itheuserfirst3186 Attraction is different then infatuation

    • @itheuserfirst3186
      @itheuserfirst3186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@addisonb.1356 I don't see why. They're not mutally exclusive. Anyway, ladies: The boys were not the problem.

  • @catherine.marial
    @catherine.marial 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9471

    It’s crazy to me that the boys never understood why the Lisbon sisters killed themselves; Their sister had just died, they had no freedom whatsoever, their parents’ idea of a punishment was to dehumanize them completely and their tree was cut off!

    • @urfavstunna
      @urfavstunna 3 ปีที่แล้ว +932

      & the mother didn’t let them go outside the house for months!! that is not good at all

    • @vintagesparkles4289
      @vintagesparkles4289 3 ปีที่แล้ว +600

      their parents were so authoritative and cruel i don't blame the girls at all

    • @dreamyanon5151
      @dreamyanon5151 3 ปีที่แล้ว +265

      @@vintagesparkles4289 you meant authoritarian* . Lol there really is a difference.. Authoritative is a more democratic parenting style where they discuss things with their kids while authoritarian is strict obedience.

    • @vintagesparkles4289
      @vintagesparkles4289 3 ปีที่แล้ว +188

      @@dreamyanon5151 haha thank you! that's humiliating, i took a psychology class and i'm pretty sure they went over the distinction and i STILL got it wrong. thank you so much for clarifying!

    • @barbaramarina0
      @barbaramarina0 3 ปีที่แล้ว +302

      It’s ironic even that men (in general) don’t get this movie like the boys don’t understand the sisters.

  • @spiceupyourafterlife
    @spiceupyourafterlife 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5999

    I’ve always viewed this movie as a harsh critique on how people romanticize mental illness. The boys idealize the girls’ shared sadness and even fantasize about saving them. That’s why we have this romantic and dreamy aesthetic throughout the movie, which is juxtaposed by the stark and inglorious climax when the boys discover the girls’ bodies and find out that they have all taken their own lives.

    • @itheuserfirst3186
      @itheuserfirst3186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      You are reading way too much into it. The boys were simply attracted to them. The story isn't about the boys. It's about the cloistered existence of the girls, and the effect it had on them.

    • @thepieceofpaperstuckonyour4993
      @thepieceofpaperstuckonyour4993 3 ปีที่แล้ว +419

      @@itheuserfirst3186 This is just their interpretations you don't have to agree. Everyone has different interpretations.

    • @nagisa0931
      @nagisa0931 3 ปีที่แล้ว +222

      I do agree with you! I always thought that the boys commentary were unsettling! But the harsh truth is that! Those boys could never save them because those boys never even knew them! Their love was superficial and all their commentary felt both unsettling and their egotistical personalities.

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +245

      yes. it was brilliant at how the film built up such a mystical image of the girls and then shattered it so quickly with death and mental illness.

    • @itheuserfirst3186
      @itheuserfirst3186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@thepieceofpaperstuckonyour4993 I know.

  • @ashley-gu4yw
    @ashley-gu4yw 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3225

    as a sixteen year old girl, this movie really spoke to me. one thing i will remember is when the dad said 'they're all going to die anyways' when speaking about the trees. im not sure if it was confirmed but i believe it was foreshadowing the girls inevitable death. this video was lovely by the way!!

    • @ephemeral783
      @ephemeral783 3 ปีที่แล้ว +136

      have you looked into the theory about how the photo the Lisbon sisters took before prom also kinda foreshadowed their death?
      It’s pretty interesting, maybe even a reach, but it’s still kinda cool to check out if you haven’t! :)
      In the photo Lux’s hand looks like she's holding a cigarette. (She dies with a cigarette in her hand), Therese has her eyes closed (She overdoses on sleeping pills). Mary is stuck between the other two girls (she sticks her head in an oven), and Bonnie is grabbing her neck (she hangs herself).
      here’s a link to the exact photo: ibb.co/ctTY4VQ

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +85

      @@ephemeral783 this is an interesting take!

    • @ashley-gu4yw
      @ashley-gu4yw 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      @@ephemeral783 I haven’t heard about that theory and I’ll check it out!! Thank you

    • @toriartemis801
      @toriartemis801 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      That line always struck me, especially in the trailer - the audio is spoken over an image of one of the girls (I think it was Therese) - making it seem like he's talking about them. That's how I always felt, and then with the metaphor of the dying trees being linked to the suicides only furthered that feeling.

    • @nutella_-qh9xz
      @nutella_-qh9xz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@ephemeral783 also, during homecoming, the song "come sail away" plays, which mentions 'a gathering of angels' which one could argue also is foreshadowing

  • @KariTalks
    @KariTalks 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3817

    I say this in the least condescending way possible, but I truly don’t think that the line “you’ve never been a 13 year old girl” hits men as hard as it hits women. I felt that in my soul. So often the teenage girl experience is trivialized, meanwhile we have countless movies and books about the teenage boy experience. I’m glad the TH-cam algorithm recommended this video!!

    • @snicklesentertainment7169
      @snicklesentertainment7169 3 ปีที่แล้ว +169

      and the ones we have with girls are only about falling in love...

    • @scottieturner.
      @scottieturner. ปีที่แล้ว +5

      As a 24 year old man for my first watch last night I absolutely loved that line

    • @rainatmidnight
      @rainatmidnight ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I had a similar experience and I'm a guy, then again I didn't grow up like other guys

    • @justinmj6586
      @justinmj6586 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      You dont know what its like to be anyone else regardless of age or gender.
      You're not special because you feel misunderstood or think you see yourself in a movie. You dont, youre not, youre just still in a self obsessed stage of life but now old enough to reflect on adolescence. Sure your mind and body were doing crazy things every day. But that was happening and has happened and will happen to everyone else as well.

    • @calistafalcontail
      @calistafalcontail 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      I am a woman and it didnt hit me at all. It was cringy to me. I dont know if she acted awfully but this had " I am 13 and I am so deep and emo" vibes.

  • @britney5256
    @britney5256 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2770

    Something that always stuck out to me was when the youngest sister was told "you are too young to even understand how difficult life gets" and she replies "obviously, doctor, you've never been a 13 year old girl." The experience of being a teenage girl is extremely difficult and no one ever wants to talk about it. Society hates teenage girls. Anything they like gets trashed on, they're seen as dramatic and any signs of mental health issues are downplayed, major improper education on sex, drugs and alcohol, adults not seeming to take them seriously, an introduction to misogyny as girls become women, the removal of childhood's rose-tinted glasses, and coming into sexuality. A lot of these can be attributed to the fact that teenagers just don't have control, they're entirely dependent on the other forces in their lives when all they so desperately crave is just a little independence. Whether it's parents, teachers, their society, their community, etc. Teenager girls are expected to act like women, they're done with adolescence, so they should be women now, while teenage boys are stereotyped as being totally wild and out of control: kids, basically. Girls are expected to act like grown women and receive none of the benefits. They shouldn't act like a child and yet every person in their lives treat them like them one. I think this is something Coppola captured beautifully, it still strongly holds up today (even without things that largely contribute to the modern version of this like social media) and I think its part of the reason this movie envelopes its audience the way it does. The average male viewer I don't think can ever quite grapple the true intensity of this movie for that very reason, just like the boys in the movie, they'll never understand the great tribulations of girlhood. Only someone who's been a teenage girl before will understand why the girls killed themselves.

    • @ziggy6191
      @ziggy6191 3 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      I want to print this comment and put it everywhere

    • @Name-tn1zg
      @Name-tn1zg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +109

      This is so true I’ve seen grown men on SM hating on 14 year old girls like bro get a life

    • @crabbss1762
      @crabbss1762 3 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      As a teenage girl myself, you put my struggles into words perfectly. It's something that i talk about a lot, but noone other than my teenage girl friends really understand

    • @axellight2736
      @axellight2736 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@crabbss1762 Hey yOur amazing GOD and Jesus are with you and love you and hear you You mean the world to HIM I promise He just wants to hear from you GOD bless❤️

    • @crabbss1762
      @crabbss1762 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@axellight2736 thanks? I guess? What does that have to do with my original comment?

  • @Victoria-ih4xb
    @Victoria-ih4xb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3462

    im 16 as well and its so cool seeing someone my age making something like this.

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +275

      this made me so happy! Its so important for girls to speak up so others know they are not alone. I hope this did that for you :)

    • @cantbesure0714
      @cantbesure0714 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      I’m 45 and happy to see someone do this.

    • @rawr6947
      @rawr6947 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      i was thinking the same thing omg

    • @r.i.pyoutube6881
      @r.i.pyoutube6881 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah it was good, she was a bit nervous tho. She kept tripping on the words but there’s something there

    • @Vampire_Nightshade
      @Vampire_Nightshade 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Me too!

  • @sineual6470
    @sineual6470 3 ปีที่แล้ว +756

    Off topic, but anyone noticed Cecilias distaste at the party? Especially with the way they all crowded and bombarded Joe (Down syndrome neighborhood boy)? She definitely noticed how they joked with Joe in a way to make fun of him, which caused her to turn away from the party.

    • @namkia205
      @namkia205 2 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      She deserved so much better :(

    • @Razzberry_dollz
      @Razzberry_dollz ปีที่แล้ว

      Joe didn’t seem have Down syndrome he felt more ASD

    • @amycarr6581
      @amycarr6581 ปีที่แล้ว +82

      Yea I definitely noticed this. It's like that was the last thing that drove her to suicide it made her lose all her faith in humanity

    • @hiiloveu1521
      @hiiloveu1521 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      Immediately picked up on that as it was very relatable. Obviously she wasn't up for a party, she tried to take her life just recently. The disconnection between how you feel and how people around you act can worsen the situation even further, which is exactly what happened

    • @Badabingbadaaaabom
      @Badabingbadaaaabom 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I think she was an empath bc she cared about the animals going extinct

  • @kim3295
    @kim3295 3 ปีที่แล้ว +553

    It’s said in the very beginning.. “how did our math teacher create such beautiful CREATURES.”

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      hi. going through my comments. thinking about this... wow. it was all in the details.

  • @maria-teresia686
    @maria-teresia686 3 ปีที่แล้ว +276

    Cecilia was the elm tree and in her diary, they skipped over the countless pages of her talking about elm trees. that shows they didn't care about her at all. they just cared about the gossip on the other sisters they were not bothered about her interests at all plus even though nature was an interest of hers, i think the elm tree pages was a reflection of herself. how she relates to it. If only they cared enough to read those pages they would've known at least Cecelia's story.

  • @fa2ma2
    @fa2ma2 3 ปีที่แล้ว +993

    i understand why trip did what he did(most boys like him are after one thing) but it made me so mad, i thought he was good somehow but then he just left her there. he knew her parents were not going to go light on her. i felt so bad for all of the girls. also how did the boys just not understand why they'd kill themselves. there were SO MANY reasons that you didn't even have to search for, they were all right THERE. sofia coppola is a great director.

    • @shroober620
      @shroober620 3 ปีที่แล้ว +241

      i completely agree with what you were saying abt trip leaving her there. not only that but he claimed he had felt a love most people dont get to experience. like how could he possibly call this love and then follow it up with "i left her alone in the field, i didn't care how she'd get home"

    • @kathrynskeen8689
      @kathrynskeen8689 3 ปีที่แล้ว +141

      @@shroober620 honestly it’s a really great commentary on teenage boys confusing lust and love

    • @janleonard3101
      @janleonard3101 3 ปีที่แล้ว +87

      They didn't want to understand because they didn't want to feel the guilt of their complicity in the girls' deaths.

    • @javipaz410
      @javipaz410 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@janleonard3101 omg complicity in what way?

    • @janleonard3101
      @janleonard3101 2 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      @@javipaz410 Sorry for taking so long to reply. I meant complicit in that Trip and the guys could have helped by talking to a trusted adult or just listening to the sisters and being supportive. But instead they caused even more harm, failing them like everyone else in their lives. There's a reason Lux set everything up for the guys to find them in the end - because she wanted to show them they were partly responsible for their suffering.

  • @mariagillenn
    @mariagillenn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +197

    what gets me is that instead of just trying to talk to the girls and hear what they had to say about how they were feeling, the boys make it a into a whole “case” as to why everything was happening the way it happened. they make them into this huge mystery when they really weren’t a mystery at all if they just took the time to get to know them.

  • @mxar2074
    @mxar2074 3 ปีที่แล้ว +551

    I feel like the parents in the movie represent "purity culture", while the boys see the sisters more like classic "male gaze-y" characters in modern media. There's sort of this push and pull between these deeply misogynistic ideas, both deeply ingrained in western culture and both demaging to young people in general. Not only can the girls not "live up" to either one of these ideals, but their mental health issues are not taken seriously. Even at the beginning the doctor tells the youngest sister that her problems are invalid because of 1. her gender and 2. her age.
    The bottom line is, girls are never taken seriously: their interests are mocked, their actions are constantly scrutinized, their appearance is scrutanized, they are dehumanized, they are objectified.

    • @peterc.1419
      @peterc.1419 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think the film is unrealistic. What western ideas? At the time this film was made, the non- Western world was worse on women. It still is. Rape figures and gender based violence figures are the lowest in the West. "Misogeny" and other such things are lowest in the West. What ideal situation was supposed to be created? What? Should the parents have allowed these girls to have unlimited sex and offered them contraption and abortion? Is that the only way?

    • @realSimoneCherie
      @realSimoneCherie ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I think that’s exactly right.
      My teenage viewing this was critical of the teenage boys in the film, but quite emphatic of the parents. African American households are usually just as strict as the Lisbon household if not more so, so I honestly never understood the criticism of the parents and it felt ageist. But the parents as symbols of puritanical, patriarchal conformity makes all the sense in the world

  • @nayarasuarez
    @nayarasuarez 3 ปีที่แล้ว +443

    When you said it’s like a little secret between every girl, it really hit me that we all live the same reality. And that is that we will never really be seen as people, but rather accessories to men

    • @henrimatisse7481
      @henrimatisse7481 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      yes! Some women overcome that and many pay the price for the accomplishment

  • @labi2999
    @labi2999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +103

    Lux was so in love with Trip. Trip wanted a "taste". He just wanted to sleep with the hottest girl in school once. I found it depressing when he left her in the morning. This girl lost her sister, gave her virginity away to a person she thought loved her, and was left out in the field, all alone.
    There was something about Lux that was so relatable. Sometimes people don't care about you, they like the idea of you and are focused on what positive contribution you bring to their lives. There is no "mystery" surrounding their death. Their pain was obvious but the boys (and everyone else in the neighborhood) were too dumb and uninterested to understand. They were being suffocated by not just their parents but everyone around them that kept sexualizing them. They were young children that yearned for love. They were taken advantage of.
    Thank you for the video essay. I enjoyed it.

  • @snackpack3787
    @snackpack3787 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2172

    I always interpreted the movie as a commentary about the manic pixie dream girl trope (though it wasn't called that yet I don't think). MPDGs are girls who come into boring men's lives and teach them how to appreciate beauty, culture, art, and life itself. There isn't a woman I know who hasn't wanted to be a MPDG in one way or another. That's what society has always taught girls to be: virginal, demure, and refined, but also passionate, loving, and exciting. The idea of the Lisbon sisters is completely unattainable. I agree that the boys could never truly be in love with them. Like Margot said in Paper Towns (another great commentary on the MPDG trope), "You love me? You don't even know me!"
    All in all, I love this video. It is very well put together and you have a brilliant mind. Keep going, girlie! 💖

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      Hi! thank you so much!
      Yes, the Lisbon sisters do play a role very much of that of an MPDG in the boys lives. They fit into the trope perfectly, as they are incredibly care free, and their love is so out of bounds that they could not live on with the weight of it.
      i hope to explore more MPDG types. I recently watched "the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind". I recommend you watch it if your interested in the manic pixie dream girl.

    • @hombredetacos
      @hombredetacos 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Rosiewithlove no they don’t they’re regular gross girls the boys put that image on them

    • @anuanuuu_
      @anuanuuu_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@hombredetacos how are they gross

    • @hombredetacos
      @hombredetacos 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@anuanuuu_ in the novel the go into how bad their hygiene and the realities of 5 girls living in one house means. The movie only hints at it but in the books you see the difference between how the collective narrator sees the girls vs how they really are

    • @ON-qy1ou
      @ON-qy1ou 3 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      @@hombredetacos I've read the book literally a dozen time. unless you see feminine hygiene products/menstration as inherently gross OR depression induced lack of self-care as also gross and not just a symptom, I think you are mistaken sir.

  • @_Alimm
    @_Alimm 3 ปีที่แล้ว +836

    As beautifully written the book is and dreamy the movie is The Virgin Suicides is pure manic pixie male gaze and I recognize that now that I'm much older than when I first loved the story. These girls were suffering, they were being abused and it all went over looked because ppl could only see them as pretty, objects to play and look at even their own parents didn't treat them as real ppl. They were always objects.

    • @janleonard3101
      @janleonard3101 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      I think that's exactly the message Sofia Coppola was trying to get across, but maybe she wasn't as effective at that as she could have been. There is a Turkish film called "Mustang" (2015) that's a remake of this from the perspective of the girls. It's available to watch free on tubi and I highly recommend it.

    • @lailanunes3895
      @lailanunes3895 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@janleonard3101 wow was not even for me, but this recommendation is good thanks

    • @janleonard3101
      @janleonard3101 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@lailanunes3895 You're welcome! I like letting people know about it when I can because it's a really well done movie. Glad you appreciated it. :)

    • @spacebar9733
      @spacebar9733 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      ughhhhh Dude, it was through the male gaze on purpose!! The movie was made BY a woman FOR women. Only a girl would notice that it was through the male gaze without being told so. I'm glad you see it, but it wasn't on accident!!

  • @prettybby4749
    @prettybby4749 3 ปีที่แล้ว +252

    I saw a comment online that said how the trees rotting was a metaphor for the Lisbon sisters, Cecilia was the first “tree” to go, whilst doing so, rotting the other trees ; the Lisbon sisters. There was no way that their lives would continue and eventually in their own way the girls rotted and died.
    There’s obviously more to it but I thought it was very interesting, your vid was great btw!

  • @cupcakeangel415
    @cupcakeangel415 3 ปีที่แล้ว +416

    What I think is really cool is that the author of the book was really glad a female director was recreating the story; That Sofia Coppola was focusing so much more on the girls, their emotions, and the details of their lives aside from what we learn through the boys.

  • @avazandra9018
    @avazandra9018 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1395

    i really loved this. i think it’s important to mention further that not even the girls own parents saw them as or cared for them as individuals. all they understood was that they were beautiful and desired which made them overly strict parents. they never allowed them to explore their sexuality either. and even cooped up in the house rather than their parents reminding them how beautiful and important individuals they were, or at least giving a decent reason for such punishment, they just found more ways to dehumanize them (like burning the vinyl). you constructed a beautiful analysis though i always knew this movie made me feel a certain type of way but you translated that feeling for me.

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +90

      It took me a few months after watching the movie to really gather my thoughts. I was shocked at how personal the film was..... despite being so many years older than me. The Lisbon sisters were truly symbols of young girls all over the world: controlled, judged, used, misunderstood, and stunted.
      thank you for leaving a comment, I didn't comment so much on the parents so I really appreciate your addition!

    • @arcane1282
      @arcane1282 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      this made me cry omg you put it so well

    • @peterc.1419
      @peterc.1419 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      How were they supposed to "explore their sexuality"? Were they supposed to have lots of sex? Including the 13 year old? Is that really what you mean? And if their parents didn't want them to sleep around until they were over 18, why was this repressive? Most parents around the world are like that. We don't see mass suicide around the world.

    • @emmabennett7699
      @emmabennett7699 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@peterc.1419 "explore their sexuality" doesn't just mean have sex. It means talk about it. It means being permitted to think about it on a deep level. It means being allowed to go out and see if you like who you are with, even if you don't have sex with them. It means masterbation, and it means being made aware of other types of sexual lifestyles. Heck I would even say being allowed to see pictures of naked people (and maybe even watching porn) is part of exploring your sexuality.
      Girls are often not allowed any of these things. The forced to repress and feel shame merely having sexual desires. They can't speak crudely. Female masterbation is rarely discussed in the mainstream. Because it's all about maintaining purity, and girl having a slight understanding off themselves makes them harder to control.

    • @emmabennett7699
      @emmabennett7699 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Exploring your sexuality, in essence, is being allowed to feel your goddamn feelings.

  • @camillelievens6317
    @camillelievens6317 2 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    The first time I watched this movie I was 12 or 13 and I remember the ending pissed me off so much because in my perspective in a way the boys drove them into death with their "love". While they were the only ones who had a sort of idea about the girls' pain as they were closer to them than most, they still never listened to their cries for help and instead continued to sexualize/romanticize them. Thus giving them more reasons to leave.

    • @namkia205
      @namkia205 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I wanted to slap each of them hehe

  • @evi4043
    @evi4043 3 ปีที่แล้ว +282

    I was around your age when I watched this movie and now I am 19. This movie still holds the same importance in my life that it did back then. As a daughter of overly strict parents I still relate to the girls so much and it was the first movie that made me cry because I couldn't help but imagine what if I was in their shoes? What would I do? It just broke my heart that they found suicide a way out of that.

  • @emmacabiran9880
    @emmacabiran9880 3 ปีที่แล้ว +160

    im 25 years old now but the wounds of girlhood still haunt me and the ending part of your essay was so moving, it made me cry...thank you

  • @Lifeishard237
    @Lifeishard237 3 ปีที่แล้ว +89

    This movie had an impact on me in a different way. I was stunned by the aloofness and distance of their parents. While also being suffocating. Nobody cared about them and it shows.

  • @PhantomKing88
    @PhantomKing88 3 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    Great video! I'm a 27 year old man who saw this movie for the first time last night and it was fantastic. I'm in that stage of my life where adolescence still feels so close, but the details are becoming more dream-like. Similar to how the boys in the story look back at their teen years.
    But for you, this is all happening to you right now. Its not nostalgia, its present. Its still real. Its still raw. These are the perspectives people need to see and hear.

  • @laurenlol894
    @laurenlol894 3 ปีที่แล้ว +112

    i think to be a teenage girl and watch this film is truly amazing it gave me a whole different aspect on life

  • @mashaeldosari7428
    @mashaeldosari7428 3 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    As a teenage girl I loved this video especially the fact that it's made by someone who is my age I loved this video essay so much and I agree with what you said, girlhood is so romanticized and aestheticized that people will look past what the young girls are going through because they're young and beautiful how can they do such dark and scary thing even though the signs were all there it was very clear that the girls were struggling, after all their sister just off-ed herself but nobody cared they brushed it off because how can they, they have everything; beauty, grace, boys, etc and I think if the movie was narrated in the girls' perspective we would have been able to further understand how they felt this way and why they did what they did. After all in the movie nobody ever saw them for who they were (not even the parents) but only the image they want to see, this idea ,this fantasy. The people around them failed to see what they were going through cause they were too busy with either obsessing's over them(the boys) or not caring about them (the parents).

  • @Mariana-ie5ig
    @Mariana-ie5ig 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3350

    Personally I see this movie as an experience for teenage white girls. As a teenage girl of color their story isn’t relatable to me. Most teenage girls of color are either HIGHLY sexualized by their families (and grown men) or not seen as beautiful from boys our age, we are only seen as sexual objects. Boys from the same POC community will usually subconsciously prefer white girls since in media and society are seen as more beautiful. I’ve never seen anyone from my community as “the beautiful manic pixie dream girl”. White girls compared to WOC are seen as more feminine and gentle which causes boys our age to see us as more masculine in comparison. Overall I just wish there were more movies showing teenage girls of color as feminine and gentle too.

    • @m.josena4485
      @m.josena4485 3 ปีที่แล้ว +518

      Yeah like I can’t relate nor can be seen by this movie too, either we are forced to be mature and sexualized or as ugly to everyone around us - another woc

    • @mareb7946
      @mareb7946 3 ปีที่แล้ว +515

      Yes to being sexualized but never desired! The amount of times I've encountered boys that have found me sexually attractive but only talked to white girls is innumerable.

    • @MonkeysInDiapers
      @MonkeysInDiapers 3 ปีที่แล้ว +295

      This is always an important thing to add to the conversation. Intersectionality is important. Being a woman and black comes with countless more obstacles

    • @christelleilmet3601
      @christelleilmet3601 3 ปีที่แล้ว +195

      THANK YOU. YOU SAID EVERYTHING PERFECTLY. Like this story would be even more powerful if it was about a WOC like a black girl.

    • @idkwhatsmynamelol9281
      @idkwhatsmynamelol9281 3 ปีที่แล้ว +266

      YES OMG!!! WOC are robbed of our femininity. Our own men treat us like crap while they roll out the red carpet for white girls and treat them like princesses. We are forced to mature at a faster rate and can't be dainty as this is a sign of weakness in our community. This topic needs to be more talked about because frankly I'm annoyed with it all.

  • @jessicacarroll8332
    @jessicacarroll8332 3 ปีที่แล้ว +139

    I'm 21 and you have articulated those 'sad girl' years that is so encapsulated by female teenagehood better than I could have! Love this :)

  • @giselleesparza2885
    @giselleesparza2885 3 ปีที่แล้ว +158

    I watched the movie a few weeks ago and hadnt liked it much. I didn't like the way the sisters were seen more as an idea rather than real people. I'm glad i watched this video, to see that I was right about that, and later to realise that that was exactly what Coppola intended. Thank you for making this video, you explained it really well. Keep up the good work

  • @hoikatia
    @hoikatia 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    cecelia's words really struck a cord. im 25 but i still remember how suffocated i felt at 13 -- not a kid, but not yet a woman, nobody caring enough to even want to understand why im acting out in the first place, so all i did was to resort to whatever made me feel more free, in the most destructive ways.... society and even our families hate teenage girls, i wish they saw them for who they are and not for what they seem.
    great video essay and great film! and im also happy to read all the comments and to understand the young generation better!

  • @Charlotte-dg5ws
    @Charlotte-dg5ws 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    Hi as a 16 year old girl (who first watched this film when I was 15), and couldn’t get my head around the many theories on the girls inevitable suicide, you really gave an amazing analysis on the male gaze and how the boys loved the girls idealistically. The boys had a lack of pragmatism so the sadness was that even as they grew up they still didn’t acknowledge the trouble of thinking they understood these girls when they were never realistic about how they had a lusting love. The parents also showed a lot of fault and we can see clear signs of neglect after Cecilias death especially through Mrs Lisbon’ actions. it’s also good to notice how when all the girls died the parents abruptly moved on and moved away trying to distance themselves from there daughters memories and trying to forget about them. It reiterates how no one really cared about the Lisbon girls.I really enjoyed this video essay and was happy to hear another 16 year old was also affected by this movie :) and the virgin suicides book is even better with the extra details have you read it? x

  • @reginakostuch3791
    @reginakostuch3791 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    I think the reason why I didn't understand why the girls were a mystery was because I knew exactly how they felt and why they did what they did. We girls see through other girls' walls and masks because we've all experienced the atrocities of this world.

  • @HelloHello-ne1lo
    @HelloHello-ne1lo 3 ปีที่แล้ว +216

    Personally, I never liked it and believed it was a romanticization and glamorization of suicide and mental illness I felt the same way about 13 reasons why, however you are perfectly aloud to your opinion, this was a very well put together video essay, your points are valid and it was nice to see a different side

    • @ON-qy1ou
      @ON-qy1ou 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @Alexis Underground the movie is beautiful but the book has a ton more context and in my opinion, depth. i don't think the book glamorizes suicide or mental illness but I do see how young girls could take the movie that way.

    • @ziggy6191
      @ziggy6191 3 ปีที่แล้ว +123

      Since the main perspective is from the boys, the movie is romaticized because they romanticize it. I always saw all the prettyness as something that was ment to be unconfortable and out of place to show how absurd the views on the suffering of women are

    • @jiayi5829
      @jiayi5829 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Is this a true story?

    • @ON-qy1ou
      @ON-qy1ou 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@ziggy6191 omg YES

    • @ON-qy1ou
      @ON-qy1ou 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@ziggy6191 "to show how absurd the views on the suffering of women are" holy shit dude. 🤯 your comment, like another one on this thread, I could read pages of. exactly.

  • @freakilybean
    @freakilybean 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    I think what’s important to mention is their mother through the movie, I feel like her being so hell bent on keeping them safe stemmed from her own trauma and in turn smudged out her daughters and created a toxic environment

  • @kris3873
    @kris3873 3 ปีที่แล้ว +89

    Hello! I loved this video, I loved the point you brought up about their rooms being "beautiful messes" and how that fits into this mysterious persona of being a girl. I also noticed during the couple times that I've watched the film how their rooms are essentially these perfect messes, chaos made up of objects that all coincidentally fit the airy, feminine aesthetic. Maybe it's partly a stylistic choice of the film but I also think it covers the whole essence of the sisters and how the boys view them. The tights carelessly hanging over the railing, the pink lipstick left open on the carpet, their environment whispers out "I'm so girly and pretty yet not in a prude, rigid way, I'm carefree, I'm a perfect mess". Definitely has elements of the manic pixie dream girl trope, the appeal of attractive disorder. Lovely video and thoughts, I subscribed and cannot wait for more videos like these ones (I feel like I'm responding to a peer in a Canvas discussion board)!

  • @SophiaRose04
    @SophiaRose04 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Beautifully written analysis! When talking about the film sofia coppola said “why can’t people make films for young women that are done with respect and treat them as a serious audience?”
    I think you hit the nail on the head with this essay! Keep up the great work :)

  • @ubermut1379
    @ubermut1379 3 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    I love how passionate you are about this movie. And as a 22-year old watching this I can confirm: You will never be the "perfect" girl or woman, but also, this will be expected of you by many men and boys and they will struggle to see you as a person beyond the image that they have created of you and fail to empathize with you. I still feel torn between being expected to be innocent yet sexy, and it is difficult to free yourself from the male gaze. I don't know if it gets better as you grow older, but the older men I have met didn't give me any hope. I think as a girl or woman, you have no other choice than learn how to cope and always try to make the world a little less unbearable for the girls and women that will follow you in the next generation. Always remember that you are not alone, women and girls all over the world are experiencing this and grappling with this, as you rightly pointed out.
    I'm impressed that this is your first videoessay, keep up the good work!

  • @jasperheart4139
    @jasperheart4139 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    i watched this movie for the first time when i was 13 and didn’t understand a thing and just cried. I dont think i ever understood it till i saw it last year, when i was 16, and now 17, it’s still one of my favorites. You did great!! looking forward to ur future vids lol

  • @jadarobinson5783
    @jadarobinson5783 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    i really feel the point you made about the movie having small secrets that only girls would understand. girlhood isn't this pillowy soft time for girls. at the point in the movie when the girls returned to school after cecilias death, the boys continued to sexualize how "strong and brave" they were for coming to school looking unphased after apart of them had literally just been ripped away. everyone knew how close the sisters were yet no one realized when all of them were basically screaming for help. mental health in girls is so downplayed as "oh its just their time of the month" "theyre being a brat" "they're attention seeking". i also kinda feel like the moms motive behind being so overbearing was the idea of the girls being wanted and desired more than she was. jealousy in parental figures is a real thing that many choose to turn a blind eye to.

  • @pixi3d3ath47
    @pixi3d3ath47 3 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    You have such a brilliant voice. I can really tell you have such a passion for the things you talk about.
    I think the movie is a great warning in terms of how not to treat those struggling with mental illness-whether it's how the parents constrict and isolate the girls and gloss over their issues to look good to the rest of the town, or the boys take every single hint of them just existing as people who've gone through immense trauma as this "dream" to fantasize about, because it's better than processing the trauma of knowing someone who died of suicide.
    And when you have mental illness, you often feel the need to be destructive in a way that entertains people who find joy in your illness, because it's the one time you feel listened to.
    I think about every single mentally ill female character I know-and I don't at all think characters like Cassie Ainsworth, Tracy Freeland, Effy Stonem, or the Lisbon sisters are 100% healthy to idolize, but it makes sense to relate to them if you've been through similar experiences. The biggest complaint about them is that teen girls will mimic their behaviors, despite the fact that these characters are all shown to be suffering because the stigma of mental illness causes them to hide their issues.
    People trying to silence any depiction of us that makes us feel heard is part of the problem.

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yes, i think bringing Cassie and Effy, who are major roles that romanticized troubled girls who struggle with mental health, to the conversation of what TVS teaches us about girlhood is very important. Personally, as a teenage girl, i wanted to be mentally i'll after watching these characters. They made it seem easy, beautiful, and interesting.
      As I reflect on these feelings I understand how dangerous this is. While these films and shows brought mental health issues to light in an interesting and easy to consume way, the glorification of these illnesses is so detrimental. We meed more representations of mental health in adolescence that are realistic in the media.

  • @dianarosales2663
    @dianarosales2663 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    THE WAY I SHOUTEDD “EXACTLYYY” WHEN U SAID THEY ONLY LOVED THE IDEA OF THEM

  • @penisfarts7611
    @penisfarts7611 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    this movie is the embodiment of the male gaze. even in dark, traumatizing events for these girls, they were being sexualized. everything they did was seen as being done for the sake of being attractive. they aren’t looked at as humans, but simply pretty pieces of art that purely exist to please men.

  • @emilyneira9911
    @emilyneira9911 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    I love this movie so much. I watched it when I was thirteen and at least once each year. Now being 19 there is so much I wish I could tell them.

  • @JaneDoe-ub1gi
    @JaneDoe-ub1gi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    I loved hearing your perspective on the movie, it truly is a beautiful piece of art.

  • @Skorpio1121
    @Skorpio1121 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    16?! Great work, keep it up! I was 17 when I first saw this movie (31 now 😩) and it had the same impact on me. I still watch it and show it to others. Can’t wait to see what you do next!

    • @juliethomas377
      @juliethomas377 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Woah u look great for ur age in ur pfp

    • @Skorpio1121
      @Skorpio1121 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@juliethomas377 thank you very much!

  • @so_trippy
    @so_trippy 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I got so obsessed when I was a teen that I bought the book and read it in one short bus ride, I'm 27 now and I'm revisiting those memories, so sad and nostalgic.

  • @imolakim3179
    @imolakim3179 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    Girl as a fan of film commentaries you did an amazing job!!!! Never would have guessed it was your first commentary. Looking forward for your next one❤️

  • @chloemorgen6278
    @chloemorgen6278 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I totally recommend reading the book, the obsession and delusion is even clearer but it also has a quality that movies can’t quite capture fully. The voice of the book is so present and after watching the movie you appreciate that voice

  • @fridaruiz3638
    @fridaruiz3638 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    very glad youtube recommended me this video i feel like its super important to keep talking about the male gaze and girlhood portrayed in movies (even twenty years later after the movie came out its still fax). great work !!

  • @QuirkyShiny
    @QuirkyShiny 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I would NEVER have had the intelligence and insight at 16 to have made this video essay. GREAT JOB. Wonderful analysis, very thought-provoking. And so glad this incredible film is finding a second life with the next gen :)x

  • @bananapuding866
    @bananapuding866 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I'm so happy this movie is regaining interest, the last time I've checked back in 2018 there were not many video essays out about it and those who were were mostly made by middle aged men. Seeing many women and fem presenting people talk about it is very refreshing, keep it up!

  • @faithv127
    @faithv127 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I also watched this movie at 16, all alone at (at the time) my best friend's house while she was gone. Watching this on my own gave me time to really think about it and to really let it soak in, and it certainly left its mark on me, just like you mentioned. This is a great video and a great interpretation of a great movie. I love your take :)

  • @deanellacassandramolato4639
    @deanellacassandramolato4639 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    your essay literally put my thoughts into words about the film, when i watched it a year ago! i felt very confused and sad throughout most of the film because i really wanted the lisbon sisters’ perspective, and not what the boys’ thoughts were about them, and i always thought that the dreaminess and lack of dialogue from the girls throughout the whole film felt wrong. i really felt connected to the sisters despite that, especially their home life-being too sheltered and the imposing of religion by their parents (i personally don’t do religion), as a southeast asian. thank you again for expressing my thoughts much better! 💖
    (P.S. i love that you also analyzed the lyrics of air’s playground love, always thought that the soundtrack alone was enough for someone to know what the movie’s about!)

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The score for this film is incredible. Makes me feel so heard.

  • @SoVidushi
    @SoVidushi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Sometimes I feel like everyone around me just wants me to be a "manic pixie dream girl" existing solely for their entertainment/convenience and they don't view me as a person who can have flaws and shortcomings. Glad to know I'm not alone ✌

  • @abbababby
    @abbababby 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    THIS is the correct analysis. every article I’ve read online misses the entire point. you fucking nailed it- thank you for making this!!

  • @ellaflynn3750
    @ellaflynn3750 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    this is such a lovely analysis. I bought the book yesterday and now I cannot wait to read it. I love your personal response, which was really relatable and you speak so eloquently

  • @garrettbrando9841
    @garrettbrando9841 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    This movie was a fever dream omg.

  • @madisonpadilla5556
    @madisonpadilla5556 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    I always felt that the virgin suicides story was better kept as a book rather then the movie translation, not to say that it was bad, but this definitely made me change my mind a bit about it

  • @lily-ic7tg
    @lily-ic7tg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    by far my favourite film ever, this video essay was excellent :) YESSS the soundtrack is incredible

  • @SubZeroJill
    @SubZeroJill 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It gives me hope that younger people are finding these kinds of movies, appreciating them, and I just think that's awesome

  • @nickthepeasant
    @nickthepeasant 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    A great first essay and analysis - first saw this movie when I was 16 / 17 and see now that I was reacting to the girls in the same one-dimensional way as the boys did, only watching it again later has given me that extra, darker and more sobering, perspective.

  • @bencesarvari2235
    @bencesarvari2235 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I only read the book but I always felt the town as an alienated community that can't take care of it's own, and everyone in it acts on self interest even when they want to seem like they are helping the Lisbons they ignore them and their grief and all of it gets medialised. Even in their darkest hours, the girls are put on a display. Mrs. Lisbon wants to shelter them from the harsh reality of the outside world but ends up hurting them. I found it very interesting how the boys even as adults dream about the girls and don't question what their responsibility was in what happend to them.

  • @rustyAF
    @rustyAF 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Playground Love is one of my favorite songs to ever be written. The carefree feelings of it contrast so harshly with the story and its magical. Also, GREAT VIDEO!

  • @megmowery-alvarado1042
    @megmowery-alvarado1042 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Im almost 27 years old with a degree in media analysis … it gives me sooooo much hope to see kids so young being so thoughtful and making beautiful essays like this one! You’re slaying!!! Articulating thoughts so well and organizing the video in a cohesive way, way better than what I could do at your age (not to sound too old lol) but thank you for sharing this!!

  • @MadiWieg
    @MadiWieg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    This was so good!! I can't believe that this is your first essay! You are so smart and you perspective AS a teenage girl is so valuable! You made me think about the film in a whole new way and want to re-watch.

  • @ooffjjfdew5400
    @ooffjjfdew5400 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    After watching this movie I had no words it’s really depressing but joyful at the same time by joyful I mean that the Lisbon sisters are new with toghter up in the skys

  • @FrozenAfricaPrincess
    @FrozenAfricaPrincess ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for making this video essay, this is such a good interpretation. I'm much older than you and first came across this movie in the 00s, but I did a rewatch yesterday and just had to look for an essay about it. You are spot on with the interpretation about how the girls were just symbols to everyone around them, including the boys who were so obsessed with them. Isn't it ironic that despite spending every waking hour observing them, they never actually saw them? The scene in the basement with Bonnie hanging from the ceiling hit me like a tonne of bricks all over again, it's the key scene if you ask me, of how invisible their suffering really was. How they were only meant as pieces of meat to gratify the boys or innocent virginal creatures to live up to the demands of their mother and wider society. Another thing I wondered, Trip is kind of the villain of the film, but who's to say any of the other boys would have behaved differently?
    Back in the day I was initially drawn to the movie because I had a similarly strict mother and had never seen that whole dynamic play out on film before. The way she locked them up and by trying to keep them safe actually endangered them, because she overdid it.
    It always irked me a little bit that the story was told from the boys point of view so we will never know the details of what caused it all. But I agree with you, as girls we know, it's like a secret code as you watch the movie, just like you said. I'm happy to see the longevity of the movie and that newer generations are discovering and passing it along.🌸

  • @MrHoodieliciousness
    @MrHoodieliciousness 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I'm a 33 yr old man nd this movie is in my top 3 favorite movies of ever!!!! I love the way u think about this movie for days afterward... Such a lingering movie...

  • @Oldusername1234
    @Oldusername1234 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    i first watched this movie when i was a teenager ( im 22 now) and i fell in love with the soft aesthetic, cinematography and the whole portrayal of sadness. i was really depressed back then so looking back in a i romanticized their sadness (just like the boys did). i watched the film again last year and i saw it in a completely different light, noticing all the things you mentioned. now at 22 i realize how much i identify with the sisters and how suffocated they felt because of the male gaze. loved this video 💕

  • @mirrorballgio
    @mirrorballgio 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Watching this movie when I was thirteen was certainly a good decision. I think it’s so amazing to see how girls naturally understand the movie without overthinking it, while men hardly get the message behind the film. Amazing video essay, you seem to be a really cool person!

  • @celery7546
    @celery7546 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    this movie is my absolute favorite because so many of us can rlly relate to it, i luv this video

  • @littleapple6927
    @littleapple6927 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    You are wise beyond your years!! This essay finally helped me understand this film. I never could understand it and now realise that maybe that was the point.

  • @vivianschwitter733
    @vivianschwitter733 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    so surprising to hear that this is your first video essay, its very well done!

  • @suzyriefkohl
    @suzyriefkohl 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Hi! I loved this video!! Im a 17 year old girl and it's really inspiring to see someone my age talk so eloquently about one of my favorite films. I also recently saw the film this January and was very impacted by it. So cool to see your analysis of it and see my thoughts put into words!!

  • @emilysalhab1522
    @emilysalhab1522 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I remember reading the novel and watching the film a few years ago when i was around 15(?) i found myself simultaneously loving and hating it for everything that we see it as. I think you did a great job with this, you should be proud of yourself♥️

  • @sadlulangel
    @sadlulangel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +562

    i love this movie but it leaves me with a sad empty feeling. it always just makes me think of how it feels to go into an empty house and be able to see how it was before, where everything was exactly and see all of the memories in your head. idk if that even makes sense lol.

    • @AW-xc1xc
      @AW-xc1xc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      ...couldn't have said it better

    • @namkia205
      @namkia205 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      That's grief mixed with nostalgia and it's such an awful feeling...

  • @elliebjarnestam7651
    @elliebjarnestam7651 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Is hard to truly differentiate what truly goes on in a thirteen year old girls head. It’s different, and unique.
    When I first watched the movie I felt trapped under the lens of a teenage boys hormonal mindset, and never realised actually how important every aspect of the sisters life’s was to understand why they gave in to their own entrapment and total lack for freedom and social development. But when you think about it… I mean how could they not?

  • @michellearreola6402
    @michellearreola6402 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    couldn't describe this movie better.All points were made and explained beautifully.

  • @_candis_candy_6409
    @_candis_candy_6409 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I really loved your video essay! I'm 15 and I too could not sleep thinking about this movie, it really does capture the dreamy elements of girlhood but embodies the way girls are objectified, really makes me think back to my own experiences as a teenager. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the topic!

  • @UnLugubreEquivoco
    @UnLugubreEquivoco 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    You did a great job! I'm 35 and I've read the book and watched the movie as they were out. I'm really glad you could express so cleverly something that I've always thought. I'm proud of you, keep it up!

  • @candice2492
    @candice2492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Thank you for this! You are so well-spoken, please keep it up!

  • @kitchen6214
    @kitchen6214 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I also watched this when I was around 15 or 16 and it resonated with me. It still does. I wish I had the courage to put out an analysis video like this when I was your age! Keep up the great work :)

  • @threelena3879
    @threelena3879 ปีที่แล้ว

    Im so glad you spoke on the soundtrack of the film! Often gets overlooked when its such an important piece that truly ties the whole movie and brings their world to life.

  • @vanessabutera4385
    @vanessabutera4385 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Great job! I miss this movie and this book. You have potential in making video essays. Keep it up!

  • @xxdeepfriedchillidogsxx4910
    @xxdeepfriedchillidogsxx4910 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    this movie never lived up to my expectations until i watched this video and i appreciate the way you analyzed this so perfectly

  • @dntwrryabt1t
    @dntwrryabt1t 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I'm 24, and I love this movie. The first time I saw it I was probably around 16. Over the years I think I've seen it countless times, and at a certain point- felt like I fully "got" it.
    Your analysis brought me a perspective I hadn't considered before, even after so many watches. We as the audience are forced to participate in the objectification and flattening of the Lisbons' lives. It's interesting to think about how a girl/woman can watch this movie and simultaneously understand the experience of being a teenage girl while at the same time be "forced" to participate/witness the unrealistic narrative that the boys/men have created......
    Maybe I'm thinking too hard now. I absolutely loved the essay ♡

  • @camyymck478
    @camyymck478 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    you did such a beautiful job explaining this movie. you are a beautiful and open-minded girl.

  • @TimeBunny
    @TimeBunny 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I’ve still not watched the movie but I really like the way you put your analysis and arguments across. You did really well with this.

  • @bubblegumbxtch9616
    @bubblegumbxtch9616 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    sofia coppola's movies are always so aesthetically pleasing, this movie, "marie antoinette", "lost in translation" and many others look really soft and the color patterns are so pretty

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      i love love love Marie Antoinette. the costumes in that film are *chefs kiss*

    • @bubblegumbxtch9616
      @bubblegumbxtch9616 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Rosiewithlove oh yes, they are so wonderful!

  • @cynthiablaq7559
    @cynthiablaq7559 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I absolutely love your take on this movie. I wonder if you’re into writing or anything like that because your words, the way you presented your thoughts were incredibly beautiful. Watching this really takes me back to when i was like 14-15 watching this movie for the first time and how i just resonated with everything. I got pretty obsessed with these types of movies after that. Something about innocence lost, girlhood and delicate femininity speaks to my soul. I’m 19 now, i’m obsessed with it still. I’d love to see more of your commentary on films or books anything you’re interested in tbh. Much love ♥️♥️♥️

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      thank you so much! I actually love writing! I write poetry specifically. Maybe i'll share some of my work on here :). I think the teenage years are the height of girlhood, but the time girls feel least young and innocent. This movie really portrayed that feeling well. I am looking for more films that work with delicate femininity as you mentioned. do you have any recommendations?

    • @cynthiablaq7559
      @cynthiablaq7559 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Rosiewithlove Thank you for replying 💕 i’d be delighted to see some of your work. And i completely agree on what you said about girlhood. I can’t really explain it but if one song were to describe my teenage years, it would be teen idle by marina. About movies on delicate femininity, I recommend sucker punch (2011), amelie (2001), hick (2011), valerie and her week of wonders (1970), dont deliver us from evil (1971), the love witch (2016). These are some of my favorites with the theme of delicate femininity, most of it is rated pg13. My favorite is sucker punch, i recommend you watch the full and uncut version. Most of these movies has sexual content in it so please keep that in mind before you watch it, i wouldn’t want you to feel uncomfortable (and mentions of r*pe too in some). Not so much about delicate femininity but more of adolescence and teenage struggles are ghost world (2001), leon the professional (1994), girl interrupted (1999) and thirteen (2003). I love these movies so much and just had to give them a mention, i thought maybe you’d enjoy them too. I hope you like these movies and maybe talk about them in your future videos. I hope to hear more from you soon💕💕 keep up the great content 💜💜

  • @gelalim88
    @gelalim88 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I watched the film just a few minutes ago. I've always wanted to see for years it but the title is what makes me hesitant. I watched it and thought what was that. But listening to your explanation, it's become clear to me how right and ahead of her time the writer is. Thank you. You're very intelligent.

  • @zacharyroman8364
    @zacharyroman8364 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    i’m 15 and i just watched this tonight. i thank u so much for this explanation, i wanted to hear a girl explain it and i think you did it very well. this movie has helped open my eyes more and more to the type of shit women go through.

    • @Rosiewithlove
      @Rosiewithlove  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      love to see it !! Its great to see boys taking initiative in empathizing with the girl experience.

  • @katygurlx8330
    @katygurlx8330 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love this video essay SO much. totally made me appreciate the movie more than I did before. its the kind of movie you can rewatch over and over again and find a new angle to view it from every time

  • @olitasdelmar
    @olitasdelmar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    The book is quite different, it's more dark and real. It hits you hard.

    • @sophie32123
      @sophie32123 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      yep🙌🙌🙌it made me feel so empty

  • @JH-kw8zy
    @JH-kw8zy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is so true. I remember being twelve and getting this Lisa frank projector that you could put slides of her art on your wall or ceiling. This made me remember projecting one of those pretty cartoon girls on our lumpy popcorn ceiling. I see that image all the time and I'm 25. We'll always be a texture "ruining" the world's image of us.

    • @leschatsmusicale
      @leschatsmusicale ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wow. That's such a profound observation about life and yet so practical and obvious that it would be easily overlooked. Seeing a Lisa Frank cartoon image of femininity projected on a popcorn ceiling. Someone could probably make an entire movie or write an entire novel around that. The world projects all these images on to us and where do these unrealistic images even come from? It is physically impossible to even reflect those images faithfully much less attempt to live up to what they represent.

  • @4uKokoro
    @4uKokoro 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I have tp say as a 27 year old woman myself.. this hit right on the nose... very well executed young miss! Being a girl, being a woman or just being female in general is so so difficult and often times toxic. The way we act and dress and eat etc. is constantly under scrutiny... we are nothing more than livestock in the male gaze... I am not saying all men are as awful... I am fortunate enough that my boyfriend and brothers and sometimes dad is better than most... they're not perfect... but they're better... most girls are trapped in the eyes of sexual desire and scrutiny and unfortunately a lot of them can't break free. We want to be treated as individuals with thoughts and feelings, where they can understand that we too have our own desires and dreams. We just want that freedom... Freedom to be understood, respected and heard... I read this book around the same age as you... probably a bit younger... but what made this so profound was that the Lisbon sister's solution to the ultimate expression of freedom was literally to die... here's a quote from the Witcher I think would for well for this essay from the character Tissaia De Vries: "Sometimes a flower is just a flower, and the best thing it can do for us is to die"
    I also recommend you look into Nina Simone's poem Black Bird on Spotify... It basically tells the story of the hardships being a black girl... it is very profound and it actually made me cry... but it is up to you.

  • @jillian4372
    @jillian4372 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    watched this movie for the first time when I was 13. I'm 15 now and I still think about it all the time. I love seeing it become more poplar and i love your take on it.

  • @jennab.6723
    @jennab.6723 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Great work, great film. Loved hearing your thoughts. More video essays on films! I recommend the sci-fi Under the Skin.

  • @crazednarwhal
    @crazednarwhal 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I would recommend the book to anyone who hasn't read it! I think the boys are bit more self-aware and so there's more commentary on the Peeping-Tomisms and the girls existing to them as a fantasy through the male gaze.
    Additionally, the book really takes time to cover the deterioration of the house during the girls lock down. Which personally is favorite part of the story, it's such an accurate portrayal of how mental health seeps into a home and dissolves it bit by bit.