Jordan is the perfect man for Jaclyn. His grace and understanding and overall caring personality is exactly what she needed to help her heal and grow and it’s so beautiful to see.
The respect Jaclyn holds for Jon still is commendable. Her love for him still shines through in how she speaks of him and understands how he was struggling. ❤️ I would love to see Jaclyn in more relaxed settings like this!
@@CinnamonGirl42069i’m pretty sure the marriage was over before jon even went to rehab. He probably thought once he got clean they could get back together but after 10+ years a person can only handle so much. He had a lot of time to get his shit together. I know jaclyn is to blame for a lot of things but their marriage ending shouldn’t be one of them.
You never stop loving someone when you’re in love with them the way she was with Jon. I remember my reality being so shattered when they split up because I seriously idolized them as a couple. That’s when I really learned that internet and reality can be so different from one another.
@@CaraStrong13 the harsh reality is that love is just not enough sometimes. When she spoke about having to set alarms in the middle of the night to make sure he still had a pulse my heart broke for her.
@@sharon21924 it is baffling, but it is true. Love is an action that at times requires sacrifice, determination, and discipline. Having an incredibly high level of affection for someone is different than being willing to put in the work.
I love that Jaclyn and Jordan never bashed Jon. Or spoke ill of the dead. In the world of everything being online, I’m glad to see influencers keeping things private. This episode does a fantastic job of showing a different side of addiction.
As someone who has been with Jaclyn since the days when she was filming in front of her fridge, I am so PROUD OF YOU!! I grew up in Brandon FL and remember hoping I’d run into you in the Brandon mall haha. You have been and always will be my favorite person on the internet, and being able to essentially grow up with you has been so cool. I love watching your evolution Jaclyn. Thank you for sharing your story with us ❤❤
Been here that long too! And I grew up in Brandon too! Then it actually happened to me, I ran into her at my church in Tampa in 2019/2020 right after her lipstick launch and we hugged and talked about it alil bit🥹🥹🥹
Same! Didn’t grow up in Florida but have been with her since those early YT days! To watch her growth from that time-personally and professionally she is finally getting to a spot where she is getting comfortable with being her authentic self. We are all here to learn and grow and I think she is getting what it all truly is about now!
This right here!! I remember those early days of Jaclyn filming in front of her fridge and girrllll you are so inspiring no matter what you are doing! All things makeup started with you Jaclyn and my heart is with you as you pour your heart and soul out on this platform for all of your fans to hear and support you. Lots of love babe!
I lost my way 9 yrs ago with opiates and alcohol. My physiologist told me that alcohol hits alot of the same receptors in our brains as opiates so i forever will abstain from all mind altering substances. When i finally felt myself laugh without drugs or alcohol it was a paramount moment. I cried from the release. In detox i never believed I'd laugh or feel normal again. Through my faith and my family i found myself once again. Thank you for hosting this powerful discussion. Its going to save more lives than you can possibly understand. I wanted to be in my feelings today and instead I turned this back on for the second time. It is so impactful to hear how much I am not alone in finding freedom from addiction. ❤
SO crazy you bring up how it felt to laugh, sober. The first time I realized like wow, im genuinely happy & laughing & just living, ALL without drugs. The way it feels to actually feel again after suppressing your feelings and emotions for so long, is the best thing 🫶🏼
Jordan is SO emotionally aware. This is the first time a man has made me realize something about my relationship. I recently had a missed miscarriage and had a really hard time coping without the support of my boyfriend. I felt angry that he wasn't there for me how I needed him to be. It almost tore us apart. But Jordan bringing up that when people go through difficulties together, it's harder to learn on each other makes me realize that maybe he was coping in different ways and I wasn't there for him either. Relationships can be so hard. Thank you so much for sharing this much and for having this conversation. Jaclyn, I've been a fan since I was 15 and I turn 30 this year. The transformation you've gone through is incredible. The personal growth is something I admire soooo much. From sitting on your floor in doing MAC makeup tutorials to this. WOW
Only you know about your situation so I don't mean to come for you, your relationship or your partner but Jordan also said that it's important to gauge the situation and understand when the other person is hurting more and when you then need to be the stronger one... and I think that since you had the miscarriage, it happened to you and your body which adds a whole other layer of trauma overall, you shouldn't have had to cope without the support of your boyfriend and he should've realized that you were probably hurting more and therefore stepped up. I hope you're able to fully heal and some day be okay with what happened. Sending you much love!
@@geminizingthank you ❤ yes it’s definitely something I had to verbally communicate that I felt like he wasn’t adequately there for me. It was also hard to even communicate that because I was hurting so much that it’s hard to verbalize when I feel that much pain, it was so hard on me it felt like a physical pain. I’m also a very emotional person overall so I have a hard time not taking it out on the people around me. It’s something I’m working on. I think if we went through that again we would be able to lean on each other a lot more. It was our first hardship as a couple
may jon & jordan’s brother rest in eternal paradise where there is no longer illness nor pain. i’ve always been a proud jaclyn supporter, and always will be. thank you for being so vulnerable with us. seeing how sweet, loving and supporting jordan was throughout the episode.. just wow. you’re one deserving woman. ❤️
I came to the comments exactly to write this. I have been watching Jaclyn since she was in her apartment. Jaclyn you are so strong and I am unbelievably proud of you. This was tough to watch because you never think of what people are going through behind the camera. I sobbed watching this. ❤ Much love to you and Jordan ❤
Jordan is so articulated, he truly knows how to read the room and how to share without overpowering the conversation on a egotistical way. I would like to hear more about his experience more on the matter. He is great on sharing without making only about himself. It is not about him but about the message of his brother story. Very respectable.
Loving someone with addiction is something you want the world to understand, and at the same time, you wouldn’t wish the experience on your worst enemy. I am so grateful to you all for shedding light on this subject because it can be the loneliest road to walk. I cried and released some of my own trauma this morning. I applaud you all for your strength to talk about this but also for the level of respect you showed to your loved ones. I related to Jaclyn so heavily when she said she was protective of Jon to this day, and it shows. Pure gratitude for this episode. ❤
as a recovering addict who also grew up around addiction / lost family members who also struggled with it, it’s so encouraging to see a productive conversation coming from a place of compassion and understanding. i loved this episode. cant wait for part 2.
The way Jaclyn is holding on to Jordan as she speaks about her father and how she got married is so comforting. She looks like she’s holding on for life and he’s showing he’s there with just a simple action
I was friends with Jon for a short time, I was almost in his music video but he chose the other girl instead which I’m so happy he did! The part where she said she would set alarms in the middle of the night to check his pulse broke my heart…. Jaclyn is so brave for this… we need to normalize these kind of talks, they are so healing.
Jaclyn has gotten ruthlessly bullied and put through so much shit but she is and always has been such a beautiful person. The respect and grace she gives her ex husband speaks volumes. I’ve been a supporter for over a decade and I’m so so so proud of her!!!
My daughters father passed away from addiction when I was 5 months pregnant. Gosh I blamed myself for SO long. And years later I finally truly understood addiction and then felt even more guilt that I couldn’t help him at the time. I had to distance myself right before he passed. This episode was so real and relatable. All of the things I now know.. I wish I could’ve told myself 7 years ago. Amazing job covering addiction and grief🧡
I’m loving seeing jaclyn so comfortable and healthy. I still miss Jon, he loved her sooooo much, he had a disease but he was an angel. Jordan is such a beautiful soul, I’m glad someone like him is with jaclyn. Wish them the best!!!! Rest in peace Jon and Jordan’s brother
Also to touch on my last comment, I wanted to add a thank you to Taylor and Tay for doing their podcast with grace. You guys have done every interview in such a beautiful way that I honestly can't say anyone else has done it like you guys, so thank you.
One of the greatest things my parents and I learned going to family programs, etc., for a family member in rehab/recovery is “you didn’t cause it, you can’t control it, you can’t cure it.” The 3 Cs of Al-anon are very powerful for those of us with love ones struggling with addiction. Obsessed with this interview and huge props to Jaclyn, as a long-term fan, I am so proud of your courage in speaking out about this. And Jordan for being such a perfect partner for our girl. And the Lautners, you never cease to amaze me at how lovely and safe you are for each other and your guests. ❤
Addiction runs deep in my family's bloodline. Although I didn't experience substance abuse growing up I suffered the fall out of it through intense narcissistic abuse. Which in turn made me walk through my own addictions in my early 20's. I've been sober for over a year now and I have no intention or desire to go back. Addiction diseases to me are also demonic. I've grown a lot in my faith and it's helped me to see the holds it can have on someone so easily. I relate to a lot of things mentioned in this video and found myself holding back tears most of the video. I've watched Jaclyn since her bright red hair in her and Jon's little apartment. I seen her get their dream home in Tampa and everything that followed after up until now. I kept up with Jon's music and also supported Jordan's cooking channel. What a great testimony it is to hear how she's walked through her healing journey. Knowing that it never truly stops. Thank you for being vulnerable. Especially after the internet has torn you to shreds over the years. I'm so thankful for this corner on the internet!
I have followed Jaclyn since the very beginning. And I have to say I love the raw relaxed openness she has in this interview. It’s refreshing as well as heart breaking. I love how she still has so much respect and love for Jon. Taylor was right, Jon would be so proud of her right now & this time in her life. I believe he’s now her guardian Angel. Great interview. Cannot wait for part 2.
As a Marriage and Family Therapist in training, I highly encourage couples and family who are battling addiction or grieving a loss to seek couples and/or family counseling. This is going to help family members support one another during the healing process.
lost my brother to addiction 2 years ago. this podcast made me release emotions and feel things I haven't in long time. thank you jordan and jaclyn for sharing.
Favorite version of Jaclyn is this. Love her and Jordan together. I’m a recovering addict of the OxyContin era, which snowballed into heroin addiction, and then meth at another point. Addiction is wild and so far reaching. Loved hearing her talk about her background and her relationship with her dad. Ah I can’t love this more. And Jordan is such a supportive king with his hand on her leg 🥹
This conversation was very powerful. Thank you for asking the right questions. Jaclyn and Jordan, thank you for answering. I've been on Jaclyn's journey for over a decade and this conversation made me connect with her more than I ever could. My father struggles with alcohol addiction, I went through it in my early 20s and am currently in a relationship with someone who had drug addiction. It''s so difficult to deal with the consequences of people's actions towards themselves, but addiction is selfish. I won't lie, I had to pause several times as I was getting triggered, however, this is the most genuine and honest conversation about addiction I've heard in a while. Jaclyn, you are very brave, I am so proud of you. Thank you ❤
My dad's brother was an incredibly talented musician -- he was self taught, and could learn how to play an instrument (well!) in just a few hours. He was insanely smart, he learned everything about computers, and he taught my cousin everything he needed to know to start his own business. Unfortunately, my uncle also dealt with addiction and substance abuse. When he was in his early twenties, the war in Yugoslavia broke out and he was drafted and sent to the front lines. He went MIA a few days before my parents wedding, showed up the day of, played music at their wedding and then never touched his instruments again. He ended up spending the rest of his life holed up in his room either drinking, sleeping, or fixing computers. He then passed away when he was only 46 years old from liver cancer. When you said that the brightest of people with the kindest souls struggle with these things, it reminded me of him. He was always very quiet, didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings, stayed in his own lane, and had such a kind, loving smile. The kids in the neighborhood also loved him and wrote him letters and drew him pictures telling him that he was a good man. Thank you Jaclyn & Jordan for sharing your stories -- I didn't realize how many people really struggle with this until listening to you both speak and reading the comments below. Sending my love out to everyone!
56:01 such a good metaphor! When I was in counseling after my dad died (I was 10- I posted another comment about that) but my Counselor explained it this way to my grandmother and I : “grief is like waves in the ocean. You’re fine, the water is calm, then suddenly you see something, smell something, hear something, taste something, and the memory of that person washes over you and knocks you over like a wave, and you crumble.” It’s a really good way to put it and helped me navigate through the stages of grief. ❤ great talk guys, can’t wait to see part 2!❤
Totally relating to Jordan. Lost my brother two years ago. We weren’t speaking when he went into the hospital and was put on life support. It had been six years since I had seen him. Addiction forced me to make a the painful decision to separate from my best friend, my brother. We had to let him go and now I’m forced to live without ever seeing him find healing. He’s finally at peace but that’s also hard as a big sister to live without him. Still in my grief journey. Thank you for being so open! ❤
This made me cry. My cousin who is an alcoholic for so many years has finally started to turn his life around for his children and I'm proud of him. I had stopped talking to him for a few years because I just couldn't help him or watch him destroy his life. He reached out to me this year and told me he has his 1 year sobriety chip and he had to turn his life around for himself and his family. I pray he contiues to stay sober.
I am so proud of both Jaclyn & Jordan for opening up. I am especially proud of Jaclyn. I’ve been a follower for so long and she’s constantly critiqued and you can tell how nervous she was. It was brave of her to share things she has never said publicly. They both have such good hearts and I feel for them.
I’ve followed Jaclyn for over a decade and watched her go through so much on camera. I’ve always held so much respect for her and felt a recognition with her about myself. I sobbed this whole episode. My parents struggled with addiction, it cost my step dad his life. I wasn’t speaking to him when he passed and I still don’t speak to my mom who struggles with it daily in and out of jail. I watched my sister get clean from hers recently. Everything they said resonated so much and it felt like I wasn’t alone in everything I’ve seen. As an almost 30 year old woman I still feel like that little kid checking my mom’s pulse and trying to keep her warm enough to wake up. It’s earth shattering. I have so much respect for their respect for their loved ones who lost their battles. Whether you are an addict, or you love an addict it feels like drowning.
This was the shortest 58 minutes of my life! I had tears in my eyes for most of the episode because I know the pain and struggles of dealing with a loved one who suffers with addiction.
27:17 I Soo understand the “sparkling people” comments - they are the ones who suffer with addiction and get eaten alive from it. My dad struggled with addiction and was killed when I was 10 years old. (Case was never solved because of the neighborhood he was living in at the time they chalked it up to drug related). He was sooo unbelievably talented with comedy and cooking. The pain will never go away of losing them and watching them struggle. Thank you for being open and vulnerable with us, all four of you. ❤
What a meaningful podcast and conversation. My heart went out to the little girl in Jaclyn that was so hurt by the trauma of addiction. Proud of her for getting herself back in control of her life. That’s one strong woman.
I have been following Jaclyn since I was around 16 and I am turning 26 this year. I have always admired her and I am so glad to see her in this phase of life. My dad has also struggled with addiction his whole life and my husband went through several years of it (with my dad). Unfortunately, I had to draw a huge boundary with my dad. My husband is out of addiction but he didn’t change until HE made the choice. Proud of you, Jaclyn and Jordan for being so open and honest! ❤️
As someone who has been with Jaclyn from day one , then watching her ex husband struggle through addiction, while my husband was always struggling with addiction . I watched her and knew behind closed doors what was going on so she was putting on a face for TH-cam and I was watching her to escape from mine . But pray God my husband is 4 years sober and leading a recovery ministry and made it to the other side. I’m so thankful for her talking about this
I was married to my first husband for 15 years and his addiction was the demise of our relation and honestly his whole life. I also lost my little brother to addiction and to hear people talk about how much they struggle also is amazing
First of all, I did not realize Taylor and Tay had a podcast! I found this because of Jaclyn, but now I am new fan❤🍋 I am so happy Jaclyn and Jordan had a safe space to share their stories. I am so proud of everything Jaclyn has overcome and I am so happy she and Jordan have each other❤❤❤
I came to your channel as a follower of Jaclyn’s, I came just to find another outlet to hear her talk. Not hoping to hear anything crazy or riveting but just because I enjoy her. I’ve been with her since the beginning. Literally since the beginning, she has never opened up the way she has here. You guys are clearly very special, to have made her feel so comfortable. To Jaclyn. I am so freaking proud of you. You have done a complete 180, you are yourself again, but better. I was in literal tears hearing everything you shared. The person you are on that couch was so brave and honest. It was truly beautiful to see. Thank you for touching on your relationship with Jon too, as a long time follower it was nice to be reminded of the love you too had and who he was as a person. Naturally I grew to love him too. It was very reassuring that you still loved him and held the upmost respect for him. You’ve saved me many times, being able to throw on one of your videos knowing it would cheer me up or bring me comfort while eating dinners alone. But today this video helped me in so many other ways. I love you, thank you for being you.
Great words Jordan I lost my sister to suicide and while I was absolutely absolutely devastated I knew it was worse for my parents. The guilt. When your babies are born you know your job is to protect them
My mom passed away unexpectedly last October due to alcohol addiction. This episode hits me in the feels. I really needed to watch this and hear other people stories. Thank you! ❤
We made the right person famous you guys ❤️ for those of us who have followed her since the beginning and saw all the hate and bashing she had to go through, seeing her now so grown up and able to open up about these horrible things that none of us knew were going on in her life is both heartbreaking and relieving at the same time. Thank you Jaclyn for being such a genuine person, your OG fans saw right through you all along. We love you!
Right?! So many people bash her for no reason and give her so much hate but I feel like anyone who has been there like we have, from the beginning; saw something special in her and knew people just didn’t see her the way we did. It was so beautiful experiencing this episode with her
I’ve watched Jac since the kitchen days and I am bawling at all this talk about Jon. I’ve seen you guys from the beginning and he would be so proud of you Jac.
I can see how Jaclyn still loves Jon. Even the bad memories and the pain. Even though he passed. Sonó beautiful how love transformes and lives beyond live. Also how Jordan loves this woman no jealousy, he understands and accepts. Such an admirable couple and partners
I LOST it when Taylor said how proud Jon would be of Jaclyn.😭..because I totally agree. Jon would be proud and Jaclyn spoke with such grace, compassion and love for both Jon and her father. I was always rooting for Jon to win the battle and have all of his dreams come true, but Jaclyn can be that voice for him. Thank you for sharing this with us. Such a great episode! Gained a new follower today!
We need MORE! Love seeing Jaclyn break down and feel comfortable around you guys. I can see the light in her again!! Jordan- We appreciate you just as much!! Thank you both for being strong and sharing.
The fact I didn’t cry the whole 58 minutes. And soon as Jordan said she back to herself i started balling !! I love Jacklyn she’s been my favorite since I discovered TH-cam when I was like 14. And I’m so happy to see here where she is today. I love her and Jordan together he is the perfect husband for her. And plus now she’s best friends with a werewolf 😂😂😂🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
You have no idea how much I needed this. Currently in a relationship with someone in active addiction. The constant fight to try to find a solution to it other than cutting them off is so real. Thank you for sharing your story
I am currently in a situation where every day I'm in fight or flight. I understand your pain, and want you to know that you are not alone. Praying for you ❤️
I've been watching Jaclyn's videos for years!! She's been one of my favorite TH-camrs for a long time now!! So happy that you guys brought Jaclyn and Jordan on the podcast!!
As someone who has watched Jaclyn from day one… I am so proud that all of this has come out in a safe place. The years of “happiness” online has truly shown its actual colours, and we are here to listen and send love. And wow, Jordan, what an amazing husband and life partner. You both together are so compassionate and it’s admiring to watch. So sorry you both experienced such heartbreaking traumas. Sending you both so much love. ❤
So proud of this woman for sharing this! Been with her since filming in her kitchen. My father is currently battling addiction and it’s been a very hard journey. I’ve been so ashamed of this my whole life. It’s scary.. Thank you for this ❤ - Nicole
Thank you guys so much for having this conversation. My brother passed 9 months ago from opiate overdose after a long battle rollercoaster with addiction. I’m still grieving and have that guilt from having the boundaries and this just made me feel really seen. Talking about this and de stigmatizing addiction and those around and in it is so important.
I’ve followed Jaclyn since the beginning, so many have no idea how FAR she has come. I’m so beyond proud of this woman & proud of how far she has come.
I'm so happy that Jaclyn mentioned Jon's music. Someone close to me struggles with addiction and and his music really helped me through the times when it was tough. The video she mentioned specifically is called "would you save me now" Hes not the one singing but he played the drums for it and is the one in the video with the actress that plays Jaclyn.
The fact jaclyn is so open to addiction, has been eye opening, not only dealing with my own sobriety everyday but having a partner who your constantly saving from addiction and yes seeing the best people with the worst demons. The fact you found you and jordan and you really just wanted to make a difference is beautiful in your life and sharing for our lifes! Always had mad respect for you babe true og jaclyn fan sense the YT days in the white chair with horrible lighting
I was NOT ready for this podcast. Jaclyn, you are such a class act. The way you honor and respect yourself, your ex and your now husband speaks VOLUMES about the person you are. 🥺🫶🏻
This was nice to watch and listen, I recently lost my sister this year on her 44th birthday due to addiction. Such an awesome thing to watch me and my family grew up with Jordan and his brother. Keep on crushing it Jordan it's so nice to see people we grew up with making an amazing life for themselves!
Jaclyn, I am so proud of you. I have followed you for years now. Thank you for being so open, honest, and strong. I am typing this with tears in my eyes. Hugs to you. ❤
Jon's 2nd anniversary of his passing is this week. And watching this just gets to me. I miss watching him post about his music and Frankie. He was such a kind cool person. Both Jordan and Jaclyn never spoke I'll of him while he was alive nor after death because he was already going through more than he could handle. So much love guys!!
It already passed. jon explained before his passing that Jaclyn moved out his stuff while in rehab and moved Jordan in. That he was blindsided by her cheating
First of all, what a blessing to have Tay and Taylor 😀 as best friends. They are truly the kindest people ever. Jaclyn I could not stop crying.. my dad battle with addiction for a long time and lost him. You and Jordan are so strong and I am so proud of you guys!! ❤❤❤
“Don’t worry bc I’m not going to do it but I pray every night to not wake up in the morning” Jaclyn! This is so real and heartbreaking and I can relate so much! So happy you are still here. 🩷 I’m sorry we did that to you!!!
I have been a huge fan and support of Jaclyn since the beginning days, with Jon, their apartments etc. all of it. I still use her makeup everyday before work. Jaclyn would mention in small ways about addiction over the years, but then pull back. I always connected to it bc of my own family. I always wished she would talk more on it because I felt like I had someone who could relate. I cried watching this today because I’ve never related to this episode more. Like Jordyn said “unlimited stories”. I’m so thankful Jaclyn & Jordyn talked on this and I have so much more respect for them and what they’ve gone through. I connect with it all so deeply and today I felt so much less alone. Love you all thank you for having this conversation 🤍
I’ve watched Jaclyn for years and she is truly in her Era. Her sharing something so personal just shows you truly never know what someone is going through behind the scenes, it’s why I always want to show someone kindness because you just don’t know. Thank you for sharing your story Jaclyn ❤
Would You Save Me Now has been on my playlist since it first came out. Addiction is very real, and it's effected too many of us. Thank you for sharing.
This episode had me sobbing. It felt like i was in therapy with you guys. So real and so deep. As a Jaclyn OG FAN i truly respect how open and vulnerable she was on here ❤
I'm only 36 minutes in and although Jaclyn and Jordan's experience with addiction is heartbreaking, it's almost comforting to know that other people understand what it's like to love someone with substance abuse. I'm currently in the beginning stages of creating that hard line or boundary with someone I love because I can't watch the downfall anymore. It can feel so isolating and lonely and I just want to say thank you for sharing your experience and being vulnerable. This is helping so many people realize that they aren't alone.
Jaclyn and Jordan, thank you so make for sharing your stories and for highlighting how substance abuse doesn't just affect the person struggling with addiction. It affects families as a whole, and and causes childhood trauma that has lasting affects on the now-grown children. I also love that you said that substance abuse is not always a choice, being in pain every day is debilitating. Jaclyn, major props to you for choosing to break the generational pattern and go on the journey to achieve sobriety.
Im soo proud of you Jaclyn for coming forward w/this & how far you have come overall🥲🤍 it’s definitely not easy to talk about. My step dad (he raised me) was an alcoholic & he pretty much drank himself to death. He passed when I was 21. Shortly after I started using substances to numb me. I still have have skeletons in my closet when it comes to addiction because I’m sooo ashamed of it. Thank God I choose to get clean & your so right no one can help an addict unless they choose to want to make the change. I have so much respect for you Jaclyn, your truly an inspiration, God bless you🙏🏽🤍
Never watched any of your podcasts, didn't know it existed, until then total. As a 29 year old in college for becoming a drug and alcohol Counselor in psychology. This is a beautiful. We need more vocalization of these issues, bless your hearts for doing this. Everyone who shared personal experiences, the questions are great too. This has both womens and male perspectives, its just beautiful
This was special to watch. I commend them all for being so open, vulnerable and raw with us. Sadly, I think a lot of us grew up around hardship so watching this made me really feel closer, and less alone. I have watched Jaclyn for 10 years now, and wow. Seeing this beautiful, accomplished woman absolutely flourish through so many hardships is truly inspiring.
I've watched happy jolly Jaclyn Hill since she started her You Tube career and that part when she talked about Jon I felt her pain. And didn't expect to cry with her while here I am waiting at my kids pick up line 😅
I’m only 24 minutes in and I can tell you Jaclyn has already made me so proud. Not that that matters but she’s been through so much already in her life. We (her followers) have followed and seen her through a good chunk of this. And now she’s here sharing her truth. That’s going to help soooo many people. Whether that be just seeing someone make it through the other side AND also making it out herself. Babe we are so proud of you for sharing your side.
To add, I think we all can feel the tension in the room. With Jaclyn’s journey, to do this sober, both Jaclyn and Jordan… so commendable. Idk anyone that would be calm to have this convo sober. I hope Jaclyn sees this as another BIG stride in her journey with sobriety.
This is such a powerful video. I am so proud of ALL of you. Jaclyn and Jordan and Tay for speaking out. Especially jaclyn and Jordan. You can hear it in her voice how scared she was and nervous. I have to say I'm so proud of you guys. Speaking up on such a heavy topic takes courage especially saying it all online when people can be jerks. I don't know what it means coming from me, but I'm so proud of you all so much. Everyone hides things because it can be embarrassing but no, speak up cause it can save a life. Thank you all for what you have done and being so real and vulnerable. And shame on people if they comment otherwise. I love you all so much and I will always support you guys 100%.
Love isn’t help, but help is love. It’s so hard to navigate addiction. I started therapy due to my sister being in the throes of addiction. I hope one day she can be free of this in whatever form that looks like for her.
I am genuinely so proud of you Jaclyn and Jordan!! I have been following Jaclyn since video #1 and love love love you. Thank you for sharing!! Taylor and Taylor are also AMAZING!!!
thank you so much for spreading awareness on these kinds of topics. you never know who needs to hear them. to watch someone ruin there lives and for you to do everything, but no impact at the same time is truly painful.
Jaclyn my story with me father is literally the same as yours , instead of an accident he got organ failure from drinking and was in the hospital sober for a year when I was 7 ! came out of it with a opioid addiction from the severe pain. And then overdosed and passed 4 years later . We are strong and I’m so proud you told your story. Have been your number one fan since the beginning ❤❤
My fiance has also fought addition for 10 years so I feel you on that side of things , along with me being sober for 8 years. I commend everything you have been there and having the strength to put it all out there ❤
Started watching Jaclyn from her very first TH-cam videos. We’re the same age, so in some ways it feels like growing up with her. One thing I have never questioned is her love for Jon. Even in the divorce, the OGs knew. Jaclyn, I just sobbed this entire episode. I’m so proud of you and I send you all my love. As someone with addiction in my own family and have lost family members I know this all too well. My heart will always go out to you and I wish I could give you the biggest hug. “The end will justify the pain it took to get us there”
I have been following Jaclyn for the past 13 years and even though we only have access to a fraction of what your true life is, I have never found someone who I can relate to the most in my life. Watching you grow as a human being and now evolving in an entirely different mindset only makes me look up to you even more. May all the wonders in life bless you.
I love how supportive Jordan is of Jaclyn, even when she talks about Jon. Some people are so quick to be like F your ex, he was a piece of crap, don't talk about them. But Jordan has shown he is truly her safe space, judgement free, and I love that for her!
Coming from a therapist, hearing the advice Jaclyn is giving that "this is not about you", is so important. It is not about you and it is so easy to take this situation personal. This mindset will help so many individuals not only in this situation but in many others.
Jaclyn, so much of your father's story resonates with the life my spouse has lived his entire life. On Thanksgiving 1996 he was on his motorcycle, a truck ran a stop sign and ran over him, then he was hit by a car and had it not been for the next car stopping being a nurse and him being a boxer with 9% body fat he would not be here today. He has metal plates from head to toe literally. Now 30+ years later he has struggled with opioid addiction that the doctors gave him swearing all along they will not let him get addicted but they had to manage the pain. He was never supposed to walk much less make it so the doctors didn't care, keep him comfortable. Well he did make it and now after consuming handfulls of opioids for all those years, he is now dying from liver cancer that the tylenol caused after finally beating the addiction the damage was done. But the hell of an addicts life had also robbed him of so many years because where one drug started it led to many many years of all sorts of substance addiction. When a persons liver is dying toxins are released and it causes them to act erratically and not knowing who he is at times. That's so hard because of the fights of fear, the hospital admissions, the forgiveness, you just cant forget. I went back to get my Masters degree in Substance Abuse Counseling and am devoting my life to helping women who are court ordered and at their last stop. Life is so unfair and drugs have claimed the lives of so many that we love and care for. My prayers go out to all of you. Jaclyn thank you for sharing your story. If people judge you for being human then they themselves need not look in a mirror. You are a wonder woman and its no wonder the strength in business that you have fought through for so many years.
Thank you for sharing your story. Sending lots of love and light your way. Thank you for turning something that has affected you so deeply into a way to help others.
I cried through this whole podcast as someone who dated an addict from 21-25 the experiences I have from then will always be with me and be extremely heavy when they get brought up. Jaclyn has been my favorite creator since I was 16 in high school🖤
I’ve followed Jaclyn since the beginning. Having watched her walk through these chapters over the years this is the most raw and inspiring I have ever found her to be. What a tragic story for both, Jaclyn and Jordan, but what a profound couple they are! Jaclyn, if you read this, I’m so proud of you. You have poured your heart out over the years for countless other things but listening to you speak about Jon brought me to tears. You were so graceful and kind and loving with it all. I’m so so so proud of all that you’ve overcome. You are such an inspiration and I truly hope that I get to hug you someday! Jordan, thanks for sharing your story. What a calling God has placed on both of your lives! I pray He continues to expand yalls territory and are able to help change lives with the testimonies y’all both carry. Thanks for bringing Jaclyn back to life and loving our Jac Attack so well! ♥️
After following Jac since she began, it's so hard to see how much she's been through. She tried so hard to help Jon, and he was truly such a good person. We could all see it in her videos with him. Jordan is such a gem. My heart breaks hearing his story too. Im so glad Jac and Jordan have each other now. Addiction doesn't discriminate. I had to walk away from my mother for different reasons but it stands the same. You have to choose yourself and it takes a while to realize that youre not in the wrong or selfish for it. You deserve to move forward and love yourself more. Sending love to anyone who has struggled, who has known someone who has, and I hope we all can heal. ❤
I met Jon a few times and we were supposed to be in a band together at one point. My heart broke when I heard the news of his death. Like Jaclyn, I lost my dad to addiction (very recently) and he was so off the rails that he offered me substances of some sort too (not even sure of what it was because he stole a lot of shit from hospitals). Fortunately, I was 16 and old enough to realize what was going on. This is a tough listen, but it’s great to hear these folks speak openly about really traumatic stuff that I can directly relate to.
As someone who has a father and step mom who have always struggled with addiction i relate to this so much and its so eye opening to see how strong they both are after the outcome they have both dealt with. Thank you for having them on to share their story and help others realize there is a light at the end of the tunnel!
Jordan is the perfect man for Jaclyn. His grace and understanding and overall caring personality is exactly what she needed to help her heal and grow and it’s so beautiful to see.
Agree. I was also thinking this. I love how empathetic he is.
He is so emotionally aware. Truly a gem! I knew nothing about him before this video but now I love him
The respect Jaclyn holds for Jon still is commendable. Her love for him still shines through in how she speaks of him and understands how he was struggling. ❤️
I would love to see Jaclyn in more relaxed settings like this!
@@CinnamonGirl42069I don’t think you as a random viewer of someone’s life have the right to hold this malice against someone you don’t know.
@@CinnamonGirl42069i’m pretty sure the marriage was over before jon even went to rehab. He probably thought once he got clean they could get back together but after 10+ years a person can only handle so much. He had a lot of time to get his shit together. I know jaclyn is to blame for a lot of things but their marriage ending shouldn’t be one of them.
You never stop loving someone when you’re in love with them the way she was with Jon. I remember my reality being so shattered when they split up because I seriously idolized them as a couple. That’s when I really learned that internet and reality can be so different from one another.
@@CaraStrong13 the harsh reality is that love is just not enough sometimes. When she spoke about having to set alarms in the middle of the night to make sure he still had a pulse my heart broke for her.
@@sharon21924 it is baffling, but it is true. Love is an action that at times requires sacrifice, determination, and discipline. Having an incredibly high level of affection for someone is different than being willing to put in the work.
I love that Jaclyn and Jordan never bashed Jon. Or spoke ill of the dead. In the world of everything being online, I’m glad to see influencers keeping things private. This episode does a fantastic job of showing a different side of addiction.
What? Jaclyn definitely bashed Jon.
@@Light-tc8xchow so?
@@shanasaria3463she cheated on him with jordan and kicked him out while he was in rehab.
As someone who has been with Jaclyn since the days when she was filming in front of her fridge, I am so PROUD OF YOU!! I grew up in Brandon FL and remember hoping I’d run into you in the Brandon mall haha. You have been and always will be my favorite person on the internet, and being able to essentially grow up with you has been so cool. I love watching your evolution Jaclyn. Thank you for sharing your story with us ❤❤
Been here that long too! And I grew up in Brandon too! Then it actually happened to me, I ran into her at my church in Tampa in 2019/2020 right after her lipstick launch and we hugged and talked about it alil bit🥹🥹🥹
Same! Didn’t grow up in Florida but have been with her since those early YT days! To watch her growth from that time-personally and professionally she is finally getting to a spot where she is getting comfortable with being her authentic self. We are all here to learn and grow and I think she is getting what it all truly is about now!
@@mrsjuhasz480 aw love that! What church? I lived in Tampa and always hoped I’d run into her as well!
This right here!! I remember those early days of Jaclyn filming in front of her fridge and girrllll you are so inspiring no matter what you are doing! All things makeup started with you Jaclyn and my heart is with you as you pour your heart and soul out on this platform for all of your fans to hear and support you. Lots of love babe!
Same 🥺
This is the most chill, relaxed and genuine Jaclyn has seemed. You could feel her words.. loved it
I lost my way 9 yrs ago with opiates and alcohol. My physiologist told me that alcohol hits alot of the same receptors in our brains as opiates so i forever will abstain from all mind altering substances. When i finally felt myself laugh without drugs or alcohol it was a paramount moment. I cried from the release. In detox i never believed I'd laugh or feel normal again. Through my faith and my family i found myself once again.
Thank you for hosting this powerful discussion. Its going to save more lives than you can possibly understand. I wanted to be in my feelings today and instead I turned this back on for the second time. It is so impactful to hear how much I am not alone in finding freedom from addiction. ❤
This comment made me cry MORE than the video. I completely agree with you! This was such a powerful conversation on so many levels.
Powerful story! Thank you for sharing :)
i screenshot your comment so i can come back to it when i feel down
SO crazy you bring up how it felt to laugh, sober. The first time I realized like wow, im genuinely happy & laughing & just living, ALL without drugs. The way it feels to actually feel again after suppressing your feelings and emotions for so long, is the best thing 🫶🏼
Anyone else notice Jaclyn fidgeting with her fingers when the talk of addiction came up 🥺 she’s so strong being able to talk about it.
She actually always does that when shes talking. I think it’s her anxiety in general.
Sucker and Stupid... 1:09
Jordan is SO emotionally aware. This is the first time a man has made me realize something about my relationship. I recently had a missed miscarriage and had a really hard time coping without the support of my boyfriend. I felt angry that he wasn't there for me how I needed him to be. It almost tore us apart. But Jordan bringing up that when people go through difficulties together, it's harder to learn on each other makes me realize that maybe he was coping in different ways and I wasn't there for him either. Relationships can be so hard. Thank you so much for sharing this much and for having this conversation. Jaclyn, I've been a fan since I was 15 and I turn 30 this year. The transformation you've gone through is incredible. The personal growth is something I admire soooo much. From sitting on your floor in doing MAC makeup tutorials to this. WOW
Only you know about your situation so I don't mean to come for you, your relationship or your partner but Jordan also said that it's important to gauge the situation and understand when the other person is hurting more and when you then need to be the stronger one... and I think that since you had the miscarriage, it happened to you and your body which adds a whole other layer of trauma overall, you shouldn't have had to cope without the support of your boyfriend and he should've realized that you were probably hurting more and therefore stepped up. I hope you're able to fully heal and some day be okay with what happened. Sending you much love!
@@geminizingthank you ❤ yes it’s definitely something I had to verbally communicate that I felt like he wasn’t adequately there for me. It was also hard to even communicate that because I was hurting so much that it’s hard to verbalize when I feel that much pain, it was so hard on me it felt like a physical pain. I’m also a very emotional person overall so I have a hard time not taking it out on the people around me. It’s something I’m working on. I think if we went through that again we would be able to lean on each other a lot more. It was our first hardship as a couple
may jon & jordan’s brother rest in eternal paradise where there is no longer illness nor pain. i’ve always been a proud jaclyn supporter, and always will be. thank you for being so vulnerable with us. seeing how sweet, loving and supporting jordan was throughout the episode.. just wow. you’re one deserving woman. ❤️
I came to the comments exactly to write this. I have been watching Jaclyn since she was in her apartment. Jaclyn you are so strong and I am unbelievably proud of you. This was tough to watch because you never think of what people are going through behind the camera. I sobbed watching this. ❤ Much love to you and Jordan ❤
Jordan is so articulated, he truly knows how to read the room and how to share without overpowering the conversation on a egotistical way. I would like to hear more about his experience more on the matter. He is great on sharing without making only about himself. It is not about him but about the message of his brother story. Very respectable.
Jordan at the end of the episode “she’s back to herself” I teared with you!! AND SHE IS BACK! 👏🏻 🤩
Literally crying right now because of that. Oh he’s an angel.
@@kaitlynphoenix66 agreed!!🙌🏻
Loving someone with addiction is something you want the world to understand, and at the same time, you wouldn’t wish the experience on your worst enemy. I am so grateful to you all for shedding light on this subject because it can be the loneliest road to walk. I cried and released some of my own trauma this morning. I applaud you all for your strength to talk about this but also for the level of respect you showed to your loved ones. I related to Jaclyn so heavily when she said she was protective of Jon to this day, and it shows. Pure gratitude for this episode. ❤
I feel the exact same way!
sending so much love and praying for continued healing for you ❤
as a recovering addict who also grew up around addiction / lost family members who also struggled with it, it’s so encouraging to see a productive conversation coming from a place of compassion and understanding. i loved this episode. cant wait for part 2.
Major props to you for starting the recovery journey. I wish you all the best 🌹🌷
I'm so impressed by you! Sending my best wishes
sending so much love! ❤ God bless you!
The way Jaclyn is holding on to Jordan as she speaks about her father and how she got married is so comforting. She looks like she’s holding on for life and he’s showing he’s there with just a simple action
I was friends with Jon for a short time, I was almost in his music video but he chose the other girl instead which I’m so happy he did! The part where she said she would set alarms in the middle of the night to check his pulse broke my heart…. Jaclyn is so brave for this… we need to normalize these kind of talks, they are so healing.
Jaclyn has gotten ruthlessly bullied and put through so much shit but she is and always has been such a beautiful person. The respect and grace she gives her ex husband speaks volumes. I’ve been a supporter for over a decade and I’m so so so proud of her!!!
Just started it herself by lying
@@TheHollyolivarriawhy are you even here if you don’t like Jaclyn? Weird…
Unfortunately you’ll get bullied on line when you continually lie, steal others brand names etc she did it to herself
My daughters father passed away from addiction when I was 5 months pregnant. Gosh I blamed myself for SO long. And years later I finally truly understood addiction and then felt even more guilt that I couldn’t help him at the time. I had to distance myself right before he passed. This episode was so real and relatable. All of the things I now know.. I wish I could’ve told myself 7 years ago. Amazing job covering addiction and grief🧡
I’m loving seeing jaclyn so comfortable and healthy. I still miss Jon, he loved her sooooo much, he had a disease but he was an angel.
Jordan is such a beautiful soul, I’m glad someone like him is with jaclyn. Wish them the best!!!! Rest in peace Jon and Jordan’s brother
Also to touch on my last comment, I wanted to add a thank you to Taylor and Tay for doing their podcast with grace. You guys have done every interview in such a beautiful way that I honestly can't say anyone else has done it like you guys, so thank you.
One of the greatest things my parents and I learned going to family programs, etc., for a family member in rehab/recovery is “you didn’t cause it, you can’t control it, you can’t cure it.” The 3 Cs of Al-anon are very powerful for those of us with love ones struggling with addiction. Obsessed with this interview and huge props to Jaclyn, as a long-term fan, I am so proud of your courage in speaking out about this. And Jordan for being such a perfect partner for our girl. And the Lautners, you never cease to amaze me at how lovely and safe you are for each other and your guests. ❤
Addiction runs deep in my family's bloodline. Although I didn't experience substance abuse growing up I suffered the fall out of it through intense narcissistic abuse. Which in turn made me walk through my own addictions in my early 20's. I've been sober for over a year now and I have no intention or desire to go back. Addiction diseases to me are also demonic. I've grown a lot in my faith and it's helped me to see the holds it can have on someone so easily. I relate to a lot of things mentioned in this video and found myself holding back tears most of the video. I've watched Jaclyn since her bright red hair in her and Jon's little apartment. I seen her get their dream home in Tampa and everything that followed after up until now. I kept up with Jon's music and also supported Jordan's cooking channel. What a great testimony it is to hear how she's walked through her healing journey. Knowing that it never truly stops. Thank you for being vulnerable. Especially after the internet has torn you to shreds over the years. I'm so thankful for this corner on the internet!
I have followed Jaclyn since the very beginning. And I have to say I love the raw relaxed openness she has in this interview. It’s refreshing as well as heart breaking. I love how she still has so much respect and love for Jon. Taylor was right, Jon would be so proud of her right now & this time in her life. I believe he’s now her guardian Angel. Great interview. Cannot wait for part 2.
As a Marriage and Family Therapist in training, I highly encourage couples and family who are battling addiction or grieving a loss to seek couples and/or family counseling. This is going to help family members support one another during the healing process.
lost my brother to addiction 2 years ago. this podcast made me release emotions and feel things I haven't in long time. thank you jordan and jaclyn for sharing.
Favorite version of Jaclyn is this. Love her and Jordan together. I’m a recovering addict of the OxyContin era, which snowballed into heroin addiction, and then meth at another point. Addiction is wild and so far reaching. Loved hearing her talk about her background and her relationship with her dad. Ah I can’t love this more. And Jordan is such a supportive king with his hand on her leg 🥹
This conversation was very powerful. Thank you for asking the right questions. Jaclyn and Jordan, thank you for answering. I've been on Jaclyn's journey for over a decade and this conversation made me connect with her more than I ever could. My father struggles with alcohol addiction, I went through it in my early 20s and am currently in a relationship with someone who had drug addiction. It''s so difficult to deal with the consequences of people's actions towards themselves, but addiction is selfish. I won't lie, I had to pause several times as I was getting triggered, however, this is the most genuine and honest conversation about addiction I've heard in a while. Jaclyn, you are very brave, I am so proud of you. Thank you ❤
My dad's brother was an incredibly talented musician -- he was self taught, and could learn how to play an instrument (well!) in just a few hours. He was insanely smart, he learned everything about computers, and he taught my cousin everything he needed to know to start his own business. Unfortunately, my uncle also dealt with addiction and substance abuse. When he was in his early twenties, the war in Yugoslavia broke out and he was drafted and sent to the front lines. He went MIA a few days before my parents wedding, showed up the day of, played music at their wedding and then never touched his instruments again. He ended up spending the rest of his life holed up in his room either drinking, sleeping, or fixing computers. He then passed away when he was only 46 years old from liver cancer.
When you said that the brightest of people with the kindest souls struggle with these things, it reminded me of him. He was always very quiet, didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings, stayed in his own lane, and had such a kind, loving smile. The kids in the neighborhood also loved him and wrote him letters and drew him pictures telling him that he was a good man.
Thank you Jaclyn & Jordan for sharing your stories -- I didn't realize how many people really struggle with this until listening to you both speak and reading the comments below. Sending my love out to everyone!
56:01 such a good metaphor! When I was in counseling after my dad died (I was 10- I posted another comment about that) but my Counselor explained it this way to my grandmother and I : “grief is like waves in the ocean. You’re fine, the water is calm, then suddenly you see something, smell something, hear something, taste something, and the memory of that person washes over you and knocks you over like a wave, and you crumble.” It’s a really good way to put it and helped me navigate through the stages of grief. ❤ great talk guys, can’t wait to see part 2!❤
Totally relating to Jordan. Lost my brother two years ago. We weren’t speaking when he went into the hospital and was put on life support. It had been six years since I had seen him. Addiction forced me to make a the painful decision to separate from my best friend, my brother. We had to let him go and now I’m forced to live without ever seeing him find healing. He’s finally at peace but that’s also hard as a big sister to live without him.
Still in my grief journey.
Thank you for being so open! ❤
This made me cry. My cousin who is an alcoholic for so many years has finally started to turn his life around for his children and I'm proud of him. I had stopped talking to him for a few years because I just couldn't help him or watch him destroy his life. He reached out to me this year and told me he has his 1 year sobriety chip and he had to turn his life around for himself and his family. I pray he contiues to stay sober.
I am so proud of both Jaclyn & Jordan for opening up. I am especially proud of Jaclyn. I’ve been a follower for so long and she’s constantly critiqued and you can tell how nervous she was. It was brave of her to share things she has never said publicly. They both have such good hearts and I feel for them.
I’ve followed Jaclyn for over a decade and watched her go through so much on camera. I’ve always held so much respect for her and felt a recognition with her about myself. I sobbed this whole episode. My parents struggled with addiction, it cost my step dad his life. I wasn’t speaking to him when he passed and I still don’t speak to my mom who struggles with it daily in and out of jail. I watched my sister get clean from hers recently. Everything they said resonated so much and it felt like I wasn’t alone in everything I’ve seen. As an almost 30 year old woman I still feel like that little kid checking my mom’s pulse and trying to keep her warm enough to wake up. It’s earth shattering. I have so much respect for their respect for their loved ones who lost their battles. Whether you are an addict, or you love an addict it feels like drowning.
This was the shortest 58 minutes of my life! I had tears in my eyes for most of the episode because I know the pain and struggles of dealing with a loved one who suffers with addiction.
27:17 I Soo understand the “sparkling people” comments - they are the ones who suffer with addiction and get eaten alive from it. My dad struggled with addiction and was killed when I was 10 years old. (Case was never solved because of the neighborhood he was living in at the time they chalked it up to drug related). He was sooo unbelievably talented with comedy and cooking. The pain will never go away of losing them and watching them struggle. Thank you for being open and vulnerable with us, all four of you. ❤
What a meaningful podcast and conversation. My heart went out to the little girl in Jaclyn that was so hurt by the trauma of addiction.
Proud of her for getting herself back in control of her life. That’s one strong woman.
I have been following Jaclyn since I was around 16 and I am turning 26 this year. I have always admired her and I am so glad to see her in this phase of life. My dad has also struggled with addiction his whole life and my husband went through several years of it (with my dad). Unfortunately, I had to draw a huge boundary with my dad. My husband is out of addiction but he didn’t change until HE made the choice. Proud of you, Jaclyn and Jordan for being so open and honest! ❤️
As someone who has been with Jaclyn from day one , then watching her ex husband struggle through addiction, while my husband was always struggling with addiction . I watched her and knew behind closed doors what was going on so she was putting on a face for TH-cam and I was watching her to escape from mine . But pray God my husband is 4 years sober and leading a recovery ministry and made it to the other side. I’m so thankful for her talking about this
Big hugs and pure happiness for you and your husband. God is sooooo good!!!!
I was married to my first husband for 15 years and his addiction was the demise of our relation and honestly his whole life. I also lost my little brother to addiction and to hear people talk about how much they struggle also is amazing
From 5 years old I fought tooth and nail to keep my mom clean. Barely ever having my own life. I lost her at 24. Stories like these are so important 💖
First of all, I did not realize Taylor and Tay had a podcast! I found this because of Jaclyn, but now I am new fan❤🍋 I am so happy Jaclyn and Jordan had a safe space to share their stories. I am so proud of everything Jaclyn has overcome and I am so happy she and Jordan have each other❤❤❤
Me too! X
I came to your channel as a follower of Jaclyn’s, I came just to find another outlet to hear her talk. Not hoping to hear anything crazy or riveting but just because I enjoy her. I’ve been with her since the beginning. Literally since the beginning, she has never opened up the way she has here. You guys are clearly very special, to have made her feel so comfortable.
To Jaclyn. I am so freaking proud of you. You have done a complete 180, you are yourself again, but better. I was in literal tears hearing everything you shared.
The person you are on that couch was so brave and honest. It was truly beautiful to see. Thank you for touching on your relationship with Jon too, as a long time follower it was nice to be reminded of the love you too had and who he was as a person. Naturally I grew to love him too. It was very reassuring that you still loved him and held the upmost respect for him.
You’ve saved me many times, being able to throw on one of your videos knowing it would cheer me up or bring me comfort while eating dinners alone. But today this video helped me in so many other ways. I love you, thank you for being you.
Great words Jordan I lost my sister to suicide and while I was absolutely absolutely devastated I knew it was worse for my parents. The guilt. When your babies are born you know your job is to protect them
My mom passed away unexpectedly last October due to alcohol addiction. This episode hits me in the feels. I really needed to watch this and hear other people stories. Thank you! ❤
We made the right person famous you guys ❤️ for those of us who have followed her since the beginning and saw all the hate and bashing she had to go through, seeing her now so grown up and able to open up about these horrible things that none of us knew were going on in her life is both heartbreaking and relieving at the same time. Thank you Jaclyn for being such a genuine person, your OG fans saw right through you all along. We love you!
Right?! So many people bash her for no reason and give her so much hate but I feel like anyone who has been there like we have, from the beginning; saw something special in her and knew people just didn’t see her the way we did. It was so beautiful experiencing this episode with her
😂😂😂 what?
@@stephanierobertson4971”bash her for no reason” um no. You might wanna look into the lives she’s destroyed but ok
Yes amen to that
I’ve watched Jac since the kitchen days and I am bawling at all this talk about Jon. I’ve seen you guys from the beginning and he would be so proud of you Jac.
I can see how Jaclyn still loves Jon. Even the bad memories and the pain. Even though he passed. Sonó beautiful how love transformes and lives beyond live.
Also how Jordan loves this woman no jealousy, he understands and accepts.
Such an admirable couple and partners
I LOST it when Taylor said how proud Jon would be of Jaclyn.😭..because I totally agree. Jon would be proud and Jaclyn spoke with such grace, compassion and love for both Jon and her father. I was always rooting for Jon to win the battle and have all of his dreams come true, but Jaclyn can be that voice for him. Thank you for sharing this with us. Such a great episode! Gained a new follower today!
First time listening.. love this. Addict in recovery 6-23-15. Daughter of an addict and a mother now. Proud of you Jacklyn and Jordan. ❤
We need MORE! Love seeing Jaclyn break down and feel comfortable around you guys. I can see the light in her again!! Jordan- We appreciate you just as much!! Thank you both for being strong and sharing.
The fact I didn’t cry the whole 58 minutes. And soon as Jordan said she back to herself i started balling !! I love Jacklyn she’s been my favorite since I discovered TH-cam when I was like 14. And I’m so happy to see here where she is today. I love her and Jordan together he is the perfect husband for her. And plus now she’s best friends with a werewolf 😂😂😂🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
I always thought Jon was an untapped talent . He was so talented may he rest in peace 🖤
Watching Jaclyn be vulnerable like this is so beautiful. This is so relatable. Addiction has surrounded me my whole life as well 🥺
You have no idea how much I needed this. Currently in a relationship with someone in active addiction. The constant fight to try to find a solution to it other than cutting them off is so real. Thank you for sharing your story
I am currently in a situation where every day I'm in fight or flight. I understand your pain, and want you to know that you are not alone. Praying for you ❤️
@@nicolecarifi-livingston2711 I wish I had a solution for us. Sending you love as well ❤️
Sending you love, light, and strength. It cannot be an easy battle. ❤
I was a part of the opiate epidemic I broke both my legs and the Dr got me hooked. 22 years later 10 years clean we do recover
I've been watching Jaclyn's videos for years!! She's been one of my favorite TH-camrs for a long time now!! So happy that you guys brought Jaclyn and Jordan on the podcast!!
As someone who has watched Jaclyn from day one… I am so proud that all of this has come out in a safe place. The years of “happiness” online has truly shown its actual colours, and we are here to listen and send love.
And wow, Jordan, what an amazing husband and life partner. You both together are so compassionate and it’s admiring to watch.
So sorry you both experienced such heartbreaking traumas. Sending you both so much love. ❤
So proud of this woman for sharing this! Been with her since filming in her kitchen. My father is currently battling addiction and it’s been a very hard journey. I’ve been so ashamed of this my whole life. It’s scary.. Thank you for this ❤ - Nicole
Thank you guys so much for having this conversation. My brother passed 9 months ago from opiate overdose after a long battle rollercoaster with addiction. I’m still grieving and have that guilt from having the boundaries and this just made me feel really seen. Talking about this and de stigmatizing addiction and those around and in it is so important.
I’ve followed Jaclyn since the beginning, so many have no idea how FAR she has come. I’m so beyond proud of this woman & proud of how far she has come.
I'm so happy that Jaclyn mentioned Jon's music.
Someone close to me struggles with addiction and and his music really helped me through the times when it was tough.
The video she mentioned specifically is called "would you save me now"
Hes not the one singing but he played the drums for it and is the one in the video with the actress that plays Jaclyn.
His song and music video flat line was so good. I always listened to it ❤
I have a new level of Respect for Jaclyn . She is such an inspiring person and hustler . ❤️
The fact jaclyn is so open to addiction, has been eye opening, not only dealing with my own sobriety everyday but having a partner who your constantly saving from addiction and yes seeing the best people with the worst demons. The fact you found you and jordan and you really just wanted to make a difference is beautiful in your life and sharing for our lifes! Always had mad respect for you babe true og jaclyn fan sense the YT days in the white chair with horrible lighting
The Lautners.......makin me cry. Such lovely people!
I was NOT ready for this podcast. Jaclyn, you are such a class act. The way you honor and respect yourself, your ex and your now husband speaks VOLUMES about the person you are. 🥺🫶🏻
Thank you guys for having this conversation. There’s always two sides to addiction, the addicts, and the people who love them.
This was nice to watch and listen, I recently lost my sister this year on her 44th birthday due to addiction. Such an awesome thing to watch me and my family grew up with Jordan and his brother. Keep on crushing it Jordan it's so nice to see people we grew up with making an amazing life for themselves!
Jaclyn, I am so proud of you. I have followed you for years now. Thank you for being so open, honest, and strong. I am typing this with tears in my eyes. Hugs to you. ❤
Jon's 2nd anniversary of his passing is this week. And watching this just gets to me. I miss watching him post about his music and Frankie. He was such a kind cool person. Both Jordan and Jaclyn never spoke I'll of him while he was alive nor after death because he was already going through more than he could handle. So much love guys!!
It already passed. jon explained before his passing that Jaclyn moved out his stuff while in rehab and moved Jordan in. That he was blindsided by her cheating
@@Paintthesewingsyou don’t know if that’s the truth… they weren’t even doing good wayyyy before that and broke up before that
First of all, what a blessing to have Tay and Taylor 😀 as best friends. They are truly the kindest people ever. Jaclyn I could not stop crying.. my dad battle with addiction for a long time and lost him. You and Jordan are so strong and I am so proud of you guys!! ❤❤❤
“Don’t worry bc I’m not going to do it but I pray every night to not wake up in the morning” Jaclyn! This is so real and heartbreaking and I can relate so much! So happy you are still here. 🩷 I’m sorry we did that to you!!!
I have been a huge fan and support of Jaclyn since the beginning days, with Jon, their apartments etc. all of it. I still use her makeup everyday before work. Jaclyn would mention in small ways about addiction over the years, but then pull back. I always connected to it bc of my own family. I always wished she would talk more on it because I felt like I had someone who could relate. I cried watching this today because I’ve never related to this episode more. Like Jordyn said “unlimited stories”. I’m so thankful Jaclyn & Jordyn talked on this and I have so much more respect for them and what they’ve gone through. I connect with it all so deeply and today I felt so much less alone. Love you all thank you for having this conversation 🤍
I’ve watched Jaclyn for years and she is truly in her Era. Her sharing something so personal just shows you truly never know what someone is going through behind the scenes, it’s why I always want to show someone kindness because you just don’t know. Thank you for sharing your story Jaclyn ❤
i’ve been watching jaclyn since her florida condo days with jon. what a journey we have been through with you. rest in peace jon ❤ love you jaclyn
Would You Save Me Now has been on my playlist since it first came out. Addiction is very real, and it's effected too many of us. Thank you for sharing.
This episode had me sobbing. It felt like i was in therapy with you guys. So real and so deep. As a Jaclyn OG FAN i truly respect how open and vulnerable she was on here ❤
I'm only 36 minutes in and although Jaclyn and Jordan's experience with addiction is heartbreaking, it's almost comforting to know that other people understand what it's like to love someone with substance abuse. I'm currently in the beginning stages of creating that hard line or boundary with someone I love because I can't watch the downfall anymore. It can feel so isolating and lonely and I just want to say thank you for sharing your experience and being vulnerable. This is helping so many people realize that they aren't alone.
Jaclyn and Jordan, thank you so make for sharing your stories and for highlighting how substance abuse doesn't just affect the person struggling with addiction. It affects families as a whole, and and causes childhood trauma that has lasting affects on the now-grown children. I also love that you said that substance abuse is not always a choice, being in pain every day is debilitating. Jaclyn, major props to you for choosing to break the generational pattern and go on the journey to achieve sobriety.
Im soo proud of you Jaclyn for coming forward w/this & how far you have come overall🥲🤍 it’s definitely not easy to talk about. My step dad (he raised me) was an alcoholic & he pretty much drank himself to death. He passed when I was 21. Shortly after I started using substances to numb me. I still have have skeletons in my closet when it comes to addiction because I’m sooo ashamed of it. Thank God I choose to get clean & your so right no one can help an addict unless they choose to want to make the change. I have so much respect for you Jaclyn, your truly an inspiration, God bless you🙏🏽🤍
Never watched any of your podcasts, didn't know it existed, until then total. As a 29 year old in college for becoming a drug and alcohol Counselor in psychology. This is a beautiful. We need more vocalization of these issues, bless your hearts for doing this. Everyone who shared personal experiences, the questions are great too. This has both womens and male perspectives, its just beautiful
I could have kept listening for another couple hours. Thank you for sharing, you are all so strong.
This was special to watch. I commend them all for being so open, vulnerable and raw with us. Sadly, I think a lot of us grew up around hardship so watching this made me really feel closer, and less alone. I have watched Jaclyn for 10 years now, and wow. Seeing this beautiful, accomplished woman absolutely flourish through so many hardships is truly inspiring.
I've watched happy jolly Jaclyn Hill since she started her You Tube career and that part when she talked about Jon I felt her pain. And didn't expect to cry with her while here I am waiting at my kids pick up line 😅
I’m only 24 minutes in and I can tell you Jaclyn has already made me so proud. Not that that matters but she’s been through so much already in her life. We (her followers) have followed and seen her through a good chunk of this. And now she’s here sharing her truth. That’s going to help soooo many people. Whether that be just seeing someone make it through the other side AND also making it out herself. Babe we are so proud of you for sharing your side.
To add, I think we all can feel the tension in the room. With Jaclyn’s journey, to do this sober, both Jaclyn and Jordan… so commendable. Idk anyone that would be calm to have this convo sober. I hope Jaclyn sees this as another BIG stride in her journey with sobriety.
This is such a powerful video. I am so proud of ALL of you. Jaclyn and Jordan and Tay for speaking out. Especially jaclyn and Jordan. You can hear it in her voice how scared she was and nervous. I have to say I'm so proud of you guys. Speaking up on such a heavy topic takes courage especially saying it all online when people can be jerks. I don't know what it means coming from me, but I'm so proud of you all so much. Everyone hides things because it can be embarrassing but no, speak up cause it can save a life. Thank you all for what you have done and being so real and vulnerable. And shame on people if they comment otherwise. I love you all so much and I will always support you guys 100%.
Love isn’t help, but help is love. It’s so hard to navigate addiction. I started therapy due to my sister being in the throes of addiction. I hope one day she can be free of this in whatever form that looks like for her.
I am genuinely so proud of you Jaclyn and Jordan!! I have been following Jaclyn since video #1 and love love love you. Thank you for sharing!!
Taylor and Taylor are also AMAZING!!!
thank you so much for spreading awareness on these kinds of topics. you never know who needs to hear them. to watch someone ruin there lives and for you to do everything, but no impact at the same time is truly painful.
Jaclyn my story with me father is literally the same as yours , instead of an accident he got organ failure from drinking and was in the hospital sober for a year when I was 7 ! came out of it with a opioid addiction from the severe pain. And then overdosed and passed 4 years later . We are strong and I’m so proud you told your story. Have been your number one fan since the beginning ❤❤
My fiance has also fought addition for 10 years so I feel you on that side of things , along with me being sober for 8 years. I commend everything you have been there and having the strength to put it all out there ❤
Started watching Jaclyn from her very first TH-cam videos. We’re the same age, so in some ways it feels like growing up with her. One thing I have never questioned is her love for Jon. Even in the divorce, the OGs knew. Jaclyn, I just sobbed this entire episode. I’m so proud of you and I send you all my love. As someone with addiction in my own family and have lost family members I know this all too well. My heart will always go out to you and I wish I could give you the biggest hug.
“The end will justify the pain it took to get us there”
I have been following Jaclyn for the past 13 years and even though we only have access to a fraction of what your true life is, I have never found someone who I can relate to the most in my life.
Watching you grow as a human being and now evolving in an entirely different mindset only makes me look up to you even more.
May all the wonders in life bless you.
I love how supportive Jordan is of Jaclyn, even when she talks about Jon. Some people are so quick to be like F your ex, he was a piece of crap, don't talk about them. But Jordan has shown he is truly her safe space, judgement free, and I love that for her!
Well .....maybe cuz Jon was Jordan's best friend.
Thank you for having this hard conversation and may the Lord use it to save others!!
Coming from a therapist, hearing the advice Jaclyn is giving that "this is not about you", is so important. It is not about you and it is so easy to take this situation personal. This mindset will help so many individuals not only in this situation but in many others.
Jaclyn, so much of your father's story resonates with the life my spouse has lived his entire life. On Thanksgiving 1996 he was on his motorcycle, a truck ran a stop sign and ran over him, then he was hit by a car and had it not been for the next car stopping being a nurse and him being a boxer with 9% body fat he would not be here today. He has metal plates from head to toe literally. Now 30+ years later he has struggled with opioid addiction that the doctors gave him swearing all along they will not let him get addicted but they had to manage the pain. He was never supposed to walk much less make it so the doctors didn't care, keep him comfortable. Well he did make it and now after consuming handfulls of opioids for all those years, he is now dying from liver cancer that the tylenol caused after finally beating the addiction the damage was done. But the hell of an addicts life had also robbed him of so many years because where one drug started it led to many many years of all sorts of substance addiction. When a persons liver is dying toxins are released and it causes them to act erratically and not knowing who he is at times. That's so hard because of the fights of fear, the hospital admissions, the forgiveness, you just cant forget. I went back to get my Masters degree in Substance Abuse Counseling and am devoting my life to helping women who are court ordered and at their last stop. Life is so unfair and drugs have claimed the lives of so many that we love and care for. My prayers go out to all of you. Jaclyn thank you for sharing your story. If people judge you for being human then they themselves need not look in a mirror. You are a wonder woman and its no wonder the strength in business that you have fought through for so many years.
Thank you for sharing your story. Sending lots of love and light your way. Thank you for turning something that has affected you so deeply into a way to help others.
jaclyn please make a podcast girl!!! you would kill it
I cried through this whole podcast as someone who dated an addict from 21-25 the experiences I have from then will always be with me and be extremely heavy when they get brought up. Jaclyn has been my favorite creator since I was 16 in high school🖤
I’ve followed Jaclyn since the beginning. Having watched her walk through these chapters over the years this is the most raw and inspiring I have ever found her to be. What a tragic story for both, Jaclyn and Jordan, but what a profound couple they are!
Jaclyn, if you read this, I’m so proud of you. You have poured your heart out over the years for countless other things but listening to you speak about Jon brought me to tears. You were so graceful and kind and loving with it all. I’m so so so proud of all that you’ve overcome. You are such an inspiration and I truly hope that I get to hug you someday!
Jordan, thanks for sharing your story. What a calling God has placed on both of your lives! I pray He continues to expand yalls territory and are able to help change lives with the testimonies y’all both carry. Thanks for bringing Jaclyn back to life and loving our Jac Attack so well!
♥️
After following Jac since she began, it's so hard to see how much she's been through. She tried so hard to help Jon, and he was truly such a good person. We could all see it in her videos with him. Jordan is such a gem. My heart breaks hearing his story too. Im so glad Jac and Jordan have each other now. Addiction doesn't discriminate. I had to walk away from my mother for different reasons but it stands the same. You have to choose yourself and it takes a while to realize that youre not in the wrong or selfish for it. You deserve to move forward and love yourself more. Sending love to anyone who has struggled, who has known someone who has, and I hope we all can heal. ❤
I met Jon a few times and we were supposed to be in a band together at one point. My heart broke when I heard the news of his death. Like Jaclyn, I lost my dad to addiction (very recently) and he was so off the rails that he offered me substances of some sort too (not even sure of what it was because he stole a lot of shit from hospitals). Fortunately, I was 16 and old enough to realize what was going on.
This is a tough listen, but it’s great to hear these folks speak openly about really traumatic stuff that I can directly relate to.
As someone who has a father and step mom who have always struggled with addiction i relate to this so much and its so eye opening to see how strong they both are after the outcome they have both dealt with. Thank you for having them on to share their story and help others realize there is a light at the end of the tunnel!