Ex-Pickup Artist Reacts To Modern Dating Advice - Neil Strauss
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.ย. 2024
- Chris and Neil Strauss discuss the state of modern dating practices. What does Neil Strauss think of the LMS dating trope? What is Neil Struss so most surprised by in the modern dating community? Does Neil Strauss think the next generation is dating wrong?
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Hello you savages. Watch the full episode with Neil here - th-cam.com/video/W35O0TfnuMw/w-d-xo.html Get 5 Free Travel Packs, Free Liquid Vitamin D and more from AG1 at drinkag1.com/wisdom
in the description or pinned comment instead of saying watch the whole unedited video here add a url with a timestamp to the exact point at which the edited clip ends. Ive seen a few of your edited clips and they have interested me, but it is always too laborious to have to find the exact point in the unedited video where the conversation left off.
Hell yea Bring Me the Horizon Pray for Plagues. 🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘
Social media completely changed dating.
How has it changed it ?
@@hidden1865it was so much better before Facebook was invented. Cold approach. Hello face to face , with good results.
it changed women's perceptions of the world and THAT changed mens perceptions of women but on the ground a man will still impress a woman as long as she isn't too broken by the social media.
But social media hasn't changed dating its changed women and that's an important distinction to note.
It changed women and women changed men.
*And* 24/7 internet access via smart phones. It wouldn't have the same impact if the only access was after work, via a PC.
@@hidden1865 the fact you said that, speaks volumes the size of the titanic in how little you know before before facebook existed.
I mean he is right, but getting your foot in the door is a huge deal. Every guy who lookmaxed knows how women changed their attitude. And dont you dare using the old " They must be more confident now and thats why" - thats insulting and just wrong. There are many scientific studies that show how much looks affect attraction. And by my personal experience - the better you look - the less you must work and less you can offer in other aspects of your personality.
both of them always sugercoat the underlying issue in dating. women now have never been secure and powerful that they become the sole gatekeeper in relationship. hence they only go out looking for a pretty men than a guy who have stable life including the ones who are neurotypical. It is the looks that makes women safe, high status, and happy. "game" and whatever the factor is now almost irrelevant.
I personally know I am an attractive person. But I know I will die someday or get old. So what I do is embrace it but not let it be a defining characteristic/trait. Leaving room for growth in other aspects of my life. So it’s a choice to rely on looks instead of behavior/ growth in aspects of life.
@@DanielCrossBoss You said it yourself - you are attractive person - it doesnt matter if you rely on it or not - you reap the benefits. And you will keep doing it until you have it.
@@Shoegazebasedgenre0.looks are only important up to a certain point.
In terms of what builds attraction:
1. Status
2. Money
3. Looks
That’s the correct order.
@@DanielCrossBoss your not getting it. The "attractiveness" you talk about is everything you stated. Pause.. no Diddy. Growing in other areas of your life is an attraction trigger in women. We have to stop looking at attraction being symmetrical between the sexes. What we find attractive is not what they find attractive. It's asymmetric. Physical attraction definitely helps. But it's the other aspects that create arousal and seal the deal. And to retain a wamen, it's another ball game in long term attraction.
I read his book "The Game" like 15 years ago and I am glad to see that his thoughts are still deep and sophisticated.
Did you ever read the sequel "The Truth" he talks about how he regrets writing that book.
Do you mean during the intro where he says it because of a mental breakdown? @@vatop1304
Same, always happy to see Style.
That book is why I’m in double digits and married with two kids. Genuinely changed my life.
Why did he regret it? @@vatop1304
Neil really shows why he is a master pickup artist. Perceptive comments and able to get to what really is under the surface.
But its not heping young men to actually seek a family or connection. if the cultrure is indoctroínating people.
siimilar to fashion industry wherre the models had to have certain slim body and height so they suffered from the anorexia. etc.
@@alenaadamkova7617 Can you elaborate?
@@alenaadamkova7617 You're putting the cart before the horse.
Men need the skills to have numerous hook-ups first. Then, they find a woman of value to connect with on a soul level.
You've got it backwards.
he got nothing, these PUA scammers are just that.. scammers... and faking status even if worked initially would be exposed hence why most these grifters got next to know decent relationships
@@James_36 Again, your focusing on the wrong thing. Focus on improving yourself and making yourself better - measurably and undeniably. A better you will attract a better mate. Once you have improved yourself, the lifestyle will appear. It is hard. I went through it. I was brave approaching women everywhere and I was broke, but I still did well. I do believe in his teachings. Don't rely on props. Focus on yourself. Those skills you develop are inextricable and everlasting
He looks like the kind of guy that would drive a convertible Mazda Miata
It’s a really fun car if you like driving.
@@demitrimoss5515 ya, i understand the cliche of which type of man likes to drive it... but they look like so much fun!
'Not that there's anything wrong with that.'
@@AvocadoAtrocity
Even in the boot.
Oddly enough I saw a vid on that yesterday, lol.
'I fit inside a Miata trunk'
They’re fun but uncomfortably small
I just don't care anymore. I've put time and effort into it for 20 years with no results. I'm only bitter with myself I don't hate people for it I'm just tired and don't care anymore.
It’s ok to fail. Some fail and others succeed. You choose the first which allows us to choose the second.
@@MasterMalrubius Be nice. Some people legitimately struggle and some legitimately, just because of how numbers and life works, may never have the opportunity. We don't know his situation.
Shift your focus towards things you can be good at, play to your strengths in life. VVomen most of the time don't even improve your life.
Did you really put effort or you just read about it and watched videos?
What was the outcome you were looking for ? And what sort of effort have you put into it ?
I would consider myself very successful with women and Chris is definitely right. The more successful you are in dating and being able to pick up women, the more you really see the personality traits that are attractive to them. Most of the time, it doesnt align with being a nice, decent person. I definitely didnt feel like I was being true to myself. It literally felt like playing a strategy game and the more you win, the less you want the reward.
So which traits are attractive to women?
So which traits are attractive to women?
I think you got it wrong. Its the reward that is very miniscule. Thats the problem. Saying as someone who went through it as well.
For those asking about the traits attractive to women is pretty simple: Unshakable confindence in yourself and your ability to get tons of women whenever you want, even if some flake or reject you, it won't matter because deep down you know others will gladly take their place in no time, that's all...
Agreed af yo! the more you get women the less you want them, jts about finding the right one and when you dont? man it sucks
Genetics are a form of wealth in men.
Robust health is a form of wealth for humans.
@@maam-yj8phwhich is highly dependent on genetics.
Same for women. Even more.
@@preciouslarochelle8487 almost every woman will have a child. Not every man will.
I mean, that's true of women, too...
I was a guy who had to learn PU game to have any sucess with women. I saw that big gap between who I really was and what a PU artist was and didn’t feel comfortable with some of tactics and attitudes. Then I started reading female dating strategy, which completely destroyed the pedestal I had put women on. From there it was easy to adopt PU game tactics.
Thank you for this. I read FDS as well and it is mandatory for young men, I'd say!
Why weren't your comfortable with them?
Any recommended books?
@JulianSirian Unfortunately, no. It was a long time ago. You need to know the 2 ladder dating strategy. You need to take women off the pedestal. You need to treat women sexually up front so you don't get friend zoned. PUA has basically turned into red pill. One good trick that I apply to negotiating that works well with women too, is you have to say stuff that makes you cringe a little inside.
Mode One by Alan Roger Currie. The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi. The Manipulated Man by Esther Villar. The Game by Neil Strauss as quoted above. That's a great start.
There are those that prop up their status with the way they show themselves, but don't have the first clue as to be an attractive person. People want a good time.
Styles is Awesome! Sooner or later people will go back to picking up and meeting in person. I don't do stupid online dating. Its the same as submitting your resume to an Employer with ridiculous and unrealistic expectations.
You'll be picking up only older women aged 35+ since most young women have anxiety disorders and panic attacks whenever somebody tries to talk to them publicly...
I know a lot of short guys that pull hot women. If you have a nice face, a nice body and have some money, if you're short you can pull hot women.
So good to see him
The problem with LMS is that any woman it attracted by the L and the M is immediately disqualified.
The reason the LMS paradigm is asinine is because 2/3 of it can’t be detected by the woman until months after you’ve met. Unless you’ve dated for months, she has absolutely no idea how much money you make or how high your status is
His book rules of the game actually changed my life. I was an under confident nerd with 0 self love and the book took me through a series of self improvement steps that really helped me out. I didn't really get into the whole PUA thing as I found the increased confidence in myself was enough to help me get girls and just be happy.
Maximising your looks, money and status can surely improve your life on multiple fronts and there is nothing wrong with working on those issues. But its also important that you work on your mental and spiritual side, because in the end we all just want to be loved, admired and taken care of, and we actually need to love, admire and take care of others.
Neil Strauss is still the OG when it comes to PUA. Throwback to the good times!
Neil was one who put everything into a book. But the courses and building of the community was started by David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating. But everything Neil and David taught back then still holds true today.
@@graydadgear so funny, cus David D settled for all his SKILLS in dating and success with improving his wealth married and got with someone not even attractive LOL. it was a total scam
I bought the book when it came out. I projected a fake mick jagger like persona. It worked for my promiscuous behaviour. For long term relationships it didn't.
8:54 That can on the right has an “eye” logo... interesting...
Perfect video. Excellent. Thank you.
This guy is a lengend, he got me into NLP and changed my life
this guy knows what's up. I had no money or status. I'm talking NONE. Lived with my mother at age 30 level status. I used it to my advantage and made that into a positive, though. My mother couldn't walk without assistance - a walker, etc. She didn't need a full time nurse, but if I didn't live there I would have had to pop in at least once or twice a week. So girls i was dating would see me escorting my mom with her rollator taking 3-4 minutes to walk a city block that takes everyone else 1 minute and I wasn't a poor loser who lived with his mom. I was a saint who treats women like gold and would do anything for them.
To get to the point that they'd meet my mom after we had been dating at least a month or so I did plenty well with women because I exhibited the kinds of high status behavior he mentioned. I didn't give a FCK what people thought of me. I was funny and interesting without being a bullshit artist, namedropper. That's someone trying desperately to claim status and it'll only work on women lame enough to be going after the same superficialities.
The problem is Neil Strauss never acknowledges that he did, in fact, have a lot going for him that the average guy does not, such as wide access to celebrities.
@@andremotivation6561 yes but Neil Strauss made it seem like he was this ordinary loser nerd that was so terrible with women that he had no shot and then learning mystery method did a complete 180. The truth however is Neil had access to so many resources and connections, largely because of his job as a writer for The Rolling Stone. Hell, even before The Game, he wrote autobiographies for Marilyn Manson and Jenna Jameson. If he was just your average nobody from a suburb in Mississippi, I don’t think he would have close to the amount of success that he did. Now you can definitely work up to that level but it’s definitely not nearly as easy as Neil made it seem.
@@citizenofcorona8783 he still got nothing, just about says it all
You could also invite Owen Cook. He is way a better person to talk about this topic.
Fax
Is he still living in the US on an expired VISA? Last I heard, he wouldn’t leave the US because he wouldn’t be able to get back in.
@@brawndothethirstmutilator9848 these are the illegals trump warned us about.
Not trying to offend you or anything, but definitely not. That guy is a scammer with zero game.
2:51.. didn’t Neil literally just confirm that money looks in status matters. It gets you in the door.
.. most guys cant get in the door because they don’t have enough looks (aesthetic, physique)
getting in the door is a big deal . If you have good, looks money status. You are allowed to make more mistakes and learn from them.
Money, muscles, and game
It’s just like sales. You don’t have to be a gigachad to get with the 10s. You’re just gonna have to go through more steps, deal with more gatekeepers, and face higher competition which LMS obviously help with.
Those dimes always require you to level up your game in all areas for them to be available to you...
You got to be authentic. If you’re trying to be someone you’re not, you may fool some people some of the time, but not all people all the time. Most importantly, you know you’re fooling yourself.
If you want something long term then yes, if you want ONS/FWB/Situationships then a mask is needed...
Pickup went through a transition from 'parlor tricks and peacocking' to 'canned responses' to 'nlp' to 'internal beliefs' to 'physiology.'
The interesting anomalous behaviors is where you have to things that shouldn't coexist - the dumpy old guy with no noticeable money picking up enviably attractive and not noticeably dysfunctional women. I think that really formed the basis of some of the progression that was more philosophical than you see with the basic lookmaxxing or looks money status approach. The practical reality is it is a balance of physical and non-physical elements where if you mastered both, virtually all women would be attainable, but mastering 1 of them would give you access to high value women, but not necessarily any high value woman, which circles around to the genesis of all of this stuff which is 'oneitis.' For people new to the game, LMS is an accessible entry point tailored for online dating. Ironically, the guy who can feed himself in a grocery store and the guy who can feed himself in the woods are not intrinsically interchangeable.
4:11 Neil is the first person I’ve heard in eons who has said ‘I THINK that…’ instead of ‘I feel like …’
One of my favourite authors.
I own a copy. Somewhere in my home. The Game. From many years ago. I'd probably find it to be comedy if I read it today.
I was at the magic castle with my girlfriend and we run into this guy with a bunch of dudes in a seminar. Neil shows her a magic trick and this other kid tries to shame me into buying her a drink to separate me from her. I tell him to buy her a drink she likes Hennessy XO. He didn’t do it, it’s my favourite cognac and she doesn’t drink 😂
how tha F does he know what its like now
he has been out the game for like 17 years
society has changed so drastically in just the last decade
that we will need centuries maybe even millennia to fully adapt to it
You can tell Chris Williamson got sick of talking about the midget fight outside.
Be confident.
You guys are missing the point. He’s a pickup artist. He goes into real life scenarios and attracts women that don’t know him. If you’ve had good experience with that you’d know that it’s not hard to persuade women to like you if you like yourself regardless of money, looks, status. Who they want the most is whoever that makes them feel the most comfortable
Older guy here. For young people I know it feels like vague and general information, but you have to try to take a bigger look at the rest of your life. Instead of focusing on the hot girl that everyone is throwing money at, focus on the things that really matter in a relationship.
Look for the girl who can be your friend, who will still be at your side when things go bad in life, who will give you a bj without telling you how boring it is after the first few years, who will laugh with you, etc.
Not saying that the hot girl is the wrong match, but you should looking deeper into yourself and your relationship with everyone in life. Friends, family, gf, coworkers, people you meet with making purchases, whatever. That will put you on the right path.
I think just being super confident/funny does absolutely work, but holy shit if you're a good height you should deffo try and get as jacked as possible, because women absolutely respond well to that. I think some of the older pickup guys, especially RSD, really downplayed the looks factor in getting girls. They often said things like looks don't matter, but they really do - still, what PUAs taught was also true....
EDIT: I'D LOVE TO SEE NEIL ON OWEN COOK'S YT CHANNEL ONE DAY.
Like it or not, a basis of Looks, money, status is necessary. You can be as charismatic or good-hearted as you want but nobody wants to marry a homeless guy. Women marry up competence-wise.
The author of the Game where it all started
Chris has a bring me the horizon shirt on? For some reason I didn’t expect that
I read his book and thought everybody in it was a try-hard douche, then decided not to go down that path.
I don't chase women who don't chase me back.
I do rad shit and have a good life.
That's all the game I need.
Kid: Mom, can we have Andrew tate?
Mom: we have Andrew Tate at home
Andrew Tate at home:
Neil Strauss is knee deep in denial.
He sure is
What do you mean?
Are there any pickup artists still around that are successful in the dating market of 2024? If so, who? If not, what useful wisdom can they impart now? Their time was from the early 2000s till about 2015.
lets thank the pick up artist for creating "Stacy"
So I’m remodeling my kitchen. Do you think either of these two guys could help me? Any useful skills? Electrician? Plumber? Drywall? Flooring? Do you think they even have a vehicle were we can go get some building supplies?
I’ve a friend - probably the best looking man I’ve ever come across, comes from a prominent family and has all the money one would want/need; topping all that off with being a very nice person.
Awful with women.
Wanna be good at anything at all?
Stop giving yourself an excuse, go out there and try.
Neil. Legend!
Ppl who think its all LMS have only lived online. Yes it is a measure for women to filter men but thatsbthe only way to filter online.
I think people need to stop worrying about what one whole group (whether it's men or women) thinks and start thinking about the individuals in their lives. You don't have to be with a whole group of people. Just one will do, lol
Did he say lux
The dude wasted his time chasing mediocre chicks.
He should have bought a ticket to Moscow or Prague and been amazed.
I remember reading his book The Game back in 2008. It wasn't really PUA advice, more of a collection of stories (similar to I hope They Serve Beer in Hell). Pretty good read overall.
I have never laughed so much as when I read "I hope they serve beer in hell" I was 18 so maybe my humor had changed but was such a funny book.
Was traveling at the time and kept breaking down in public coffee shops😅
same
Mad respect for connecting these two books.
Also Tucker Max wrote a review of The Game that is worth reading.
All the lms stuff would probably help but ive got 2 friends who have none of that but have no issues with getting women they like. They are both short asf too. Maybe 5"5 each. But they just have no fear when we go out and the women respond positively each time. Whereas my doubtful ass cant get a match yet alone a number.. Seriously, Doubt is the killer and women can sniff it from a mile away..
Being bold is necessary.
Its like almost the only thing that matters
@ethansleeper6952 Necessary but not sufficient.
Boldness will get your foot in the door, but need to bring charm/charisma with you. Looks will provide more or less margin for error.
And boldness needs to be coupled with resilience because every guy will get rejected at some point.
Well yes, doubt is literally the opposite of confidence.
And confidence has always been a known essential.
Confidence & Competence.
As a 22 year old 5’8 guy, I am a 7 out of 10 at best and babyfaced and I can’t grow facial hair to save my life. I do have a jawline and fit not buff. For me working out consistently, dressing well, and working on my goals builds my confidence. Once you have the confidence you can attract the women you want. Today I was outside for a doctors appointment and there a receptionist was clearly attracted to me but my mom was next to me and I didn’t feel comfortable approaching in front of my mom but the woman wrote her name on the card of my next appointment. A woman who wants you will also make effort on her end when necessary. I am planning on talking to her next week. Even to burn time with my mom I went to the target downstairs and women were looking at me. If you are a good dude just improve on your looks to get you through the door. It is easier to be a good dude first and then work on yourself next. Don’t worry man your time will come just live life and the right ones come when you enter that stage of life. You just simply aren’t there yet. Keep your head up! 👍🏻
I do have to say, for me, my confidence starting as a computer nerd, MASSIVELY increased by four factors, half of which are looks related: gaining 30-40lbs of muscle in a decade, getting an actual haircut, playing drums in a halfdecent band and getting a job matching my intellect (feeling useful and economically secure). 90% of my game is a CONSEQUENCE of the massive confidence gains, because now I'm more confident, it's easier for me to take initiative, experiment and take risks, because I'm not as affraid of failure anymore, because I'm already content with where I'm at in life.
Well done!
awesome for ya
Sounds exhausting.
@GlutenSensitivityReader Maybe you need more imagination. Like imagining other things that give life meaning, instead of relying on another person making you whole.
So basically you’re dependent on all of those external things in order for you to be confident.
Take one or more of them away and you’d fall in a heap again.
True confidence comes from within. From believing in yourself no matter whether you have all those types of things or not.
I got a lot of women in my prime and I promise you, social media changed everything. Us trying to give these young men out here dating advice based on what worked for us is like us telling you you should have invested in blackrock when you were 6. You were aged out of any type of normal success. Improvise, adapt and overcome.
Game worked and still works the same way. Nothing changed in that regard
It depends on the social media. For sure the visual social medias, like Instagram and Tinder rely heavily on what Neil in this video said was, "getting your foot in the door." However, for text-based social medias, like X, Reddit, and Discord, the, "foot in the door," is how you write. No matter the media though, once you have your, "foot in the door," I think Neil's stances and advice holds.
Can still meet women in the real world
@@McTrump For sure. I have one. I’m telling you you’re all paying hoeflation.
@@marcm83 met mine irl. I have an amazing gf thanks
Yup, most of game is simply a matter of YOU VS YOU. I've seen taller guys than me psyche themselves out or overthink things or struggle with crippling approach anxiety. I just don't care and go for it. It's a numbers game, like sales. It's all your mental attitude. Of course, being 6'2 (or taller) and handsome won't hurt, but it's all a matter of playing the hand you're dealt in life and optimizing whatever you can given your circumstances, and being able to quickly adjust and read the room and read how she reacts to you (or doesn't react).
Body game + mouthpiece + grooming + personal style = master player with a body count of over 3 digits.
Social media changed everything, the game has changed.
It has, now guys have to level up their social media game, take good pics, etc, because they're no longer just competing in a local market for local women, but even beautiful women women are now being hit on from dudes all over the world including celebs and blue checkmark accounts on IG.
no it didnt, it was always about looks. Its just nature, looks = genetics = attraction
How much time ?
@@johannsebastianbach3411 great reply
Naaahhh, the game is the same as it always was, just with better technology and more info, women were, are and will be picky no matter the time, breaking their multiple barriers is how you get access to their mind, heart and body...
Social media has changed dating. 19 year old dating millionaires. Regular men and healthy women are so buried under the chaos
Women have always been material creatures, a young and very beautiful woman will look to get a rich man to secure her life. Of course, not all women are like that, but there are few.
@@nenkobaylov2470but they never has such easy access to rich guys or athletes
If you aren't going to put in any effort, then just say in your lane. Don't go after a dime if you're a nickel.
No.
They failed to adapted and they stopped learning.
😂😂😂
@@thaneros I would argue - go after the dime even if you are nickel. You never know.
Neil Strauss nails it 100% on every level. It probably doesn't sell like all the other nonsense out there, but his advice is that simple and that true. So refreshing to hear. Key point, people generally look for what underpins the LMS, not necessarily the LMS.
@@AndreAngelantoni Except the animal world doesn't have protection and provisions given away for free - 911/police/military/firefighters/EMS & Welfare State. The only thing that remains is feelings. Focus on feelings.
LMS is still a heuristic of what a women THINKS will give her feelings. It is not even that she is looking for protection. She has emergency services for free on standby. The Metafactor is feelings. Focus on creating and capturing her feelings and nothing else matters.
@@AndreAngelantoni Not true. If it were then fraud-maxing wouldn't be possible.
@@hijackhypergamyand how do you do that
@@hijackhypergamyhow
Neil's book changed my life....showed me how much going down that path wasn't for me. Was very well done and highly entertaining but came out at the time in my life where I was earning real money and had to either wife up or slut up. I hope my wife is happy with my choice...I am.
Good for you, I waited for my virgin damsel but she never appeared, so being a ruthless player was my only option...
While LMS undoubtedly play a role in initial attraction, overemphasising these factors can lead to shallow relationships and personal dissatisfaction. Fostering self-awareness, authenticity, and an internal locus of control offers a more holistic and fulfilling relationship approach.
If you are deficit in all three, then you are pretty much invisible. Whilst shallow, they are prerequisites. It’s just the way it is and all the data proves it.
The reason the LMS paradigm is asinine is because 2/3 of it can’t be detected by the woman until months after you’ve met. Unless you’ve dated for months, she has absolutely no idea how much money you make or how high your status is
@@Frederick0220 that’s not entirely true. People with money and status nearly always have indicators that are fairly visible. Their body language, the clothes they choose, and the way they interact with people. The problem with wealth and status is that they aren’t attracted to you; they’re attracted to your wealth and status. That’s even true for looks. You could have the worlds best genetics, but if you survive a bad fire, no women will be attracted to you. 99% of attraction is superficial.
@@peripheralparadox4218I agree. Also, women are Getting more and more skilled at picking up clues when it comes to status. There are also more and more fakes. Posers. Flexing fake wealth
@@peripheralparadox4218 and yet they mean nothing in the long haul. His point stands.
Looks, money, status are attributes that maybe successful for short-term "dating," but aren't reliable assets for long-term mating/relationships. Personal attributes like self awareness, integrity, accountability, reciprocity, empathy and humility are more important to maintain a relationship. Without them, you can allure and seduce women, but you can't keep her unless she has low self-esteem and puts up with a man who is self-centered, irresponsible, entitled, arrogant, devaluing, abusive and neglectful just because he's got the LMS and is +6 foot tall.
I was thinking the same thing. I went to the Christian Church to find a woman wearing a long white dress. The Church was good. Didn't find the woman though, had one false alarm. My unicorn
That's right. People value the wrong things so, most likely never going to change.
the cope never ends
@@Shoegazebasedgenre0. To live is to cope, otherwise you'll ropemaxx instantly...
Chris is wearing a BMTH shirt?! Respect...
I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY!!!
Looks from that warped tour era too 🤘🏼
_Gigachad theme song intensifies_
Chris hit the nail on the head there. I am socially awkward. I read The Game, applied it...and was utterly disgusted by how well it worked. Haven't been motivated all that much with dating ever since.
Yeah, for me it shows up as humility being punished and bravado being rewarded, I can put on bravado in a way that appeals to many women, but I find it sort of disgusting and I admire myself and others more when I display humility. But I got laid like crazy when I did the opposite
@@csadams404 Humility isn't being punished, you're just not leading with that aspect of yourself when you're out focused on meeting and attracting women. When you show the trait of humility later on, she will find it attractive as part of the total package.
If that's been your experience, great, but in my experience women fall in love with the mask. When you take it off, they despise you for deceiving them and it can break their heart.
I think you guys are just attracted to the wrong kind of women. If the right amount of humility is a turnoff for someone that is a huge red flag, why would you ever want a longterm relationship with someone like that?
Meh, in my experience looks are absolutely godlike and my behaviour matters next to 0.
Safety is really what it is about for reasonable, not crazy women. It only took me sixteen years of gradually destroying a marriage, and another sixteen of contemplation plus watching tons of others in their relationships to figure that out. About crazy wimins, why any man bothers with them, I don't know.
I like how he turned out, definitely my favorite pua.
Good to see Neil after a long time. I spoke to him a decade ago and interacted with Mystery too! The game changed my life.
Very cool to hear Neil talking about this subject. Would love to hear more perspectives he has, even if it’s changed over time.
becomes rich
gets married
if the grift still makes money keep doing it
bro thinks hes him
trying to see what dialogue option will land him the chick lol
pure foolery smh
Still to this day
Neil. Respect
Just work to better yourself and youll be just fine. Everyday just get a little bit better than yesterday.
Holy smokes, I am SOO interested in what this guy has to say about the dating game.
Also, Chriss operates from the false assumption that everyone is faking it. Self-development is not about faking anything. This is what is entirely misunderstood about the red pill - nobody aims at faking anything, they are in for the real deal. What Neil Strauss is missing is the evolution from PUA to self-development and self-improvement.
Neil needs religion. He's an addict.
I wouldn't have recognised Neil Straus' face unless he spoke 😂
4:53 being high value is a multipler. it makes it easier to seduce. makes it easier to trigger the emotions. But if (1) you don't try to seduce or (2) don't k ow how to seduce, then, you'll just end up as the girl's High Value Male friend
Look this guy knows what he is talking about BUT i think he is not aware how much things changed in post Social Media era. It was completely different playing field in 90s- 2000s
it wasnt, PUA was a scam, I met up with some dudes applying it, met someone in the know that has all these guys backgrounds they didnt get nothing.. they got plenty of false phone numbers
@@James_36 think about it, these guys at least approached the girls and did numbers thing. If 1 in 20 girl wanted something more it's a success in their book.
I am a woman, but from what I know about men it is actually: family, feeling of acomplishment, good supportive lifelong frienships.
You have correctly labeled all but the psychopaths.
Not in the club......in that environment looks are king, FACTS
@@Barbarian646 I am a married woman with two kids. I have zero club experience, so I will trust you on this one :D
@tonyshine89 yup. I spent over 10 years working in bars etc as a bouncer
As in those things are the most attractive traits in men as seen by women? And 'feeling of accomplishment' means them being happy with themselves, or accomplished from the perspective of others?
Damm,neil has aged like fuck
F in legend! Both Neil and Mystery changed my life.
No, Neil Strauss, looks money and status is what’s most attractive to vvomen, especially LOOKS with regards to genuine desire.
And Neil Strauss is NOT a pick up artist, vvomen run away from men who look like Neil Strauss.
PUA is 100% BS, vvomen go by LOOKS first, if you don’t pass the LOOKS test with a vvoman it’s GAME over.
Neil Strauss is COPING hard here.
Don’t be a free agent in life, let the B.lackpill guide you.
He looks like Andrew tate if he didnt box 😂
wow... Style.... been hell of a while.... good to see u again.
For younger guys, the best option is actually confidence, sense of humour and popularity. That’s who gets the girls.
Most young guys don’t have any real money or status - they’re too young. The highest status men are middle aged and married. And looks is a relatively nebulous concept - women go for all kinds of aesthetics.
Ideally, you want to be the guy that everyone is happy to see at the party or club, who can make them all laugh and relax.
There is an "Employer/Employee" dynamic thats developed between men and women. A lot of women will slot into dynamic in a silent and covert way. I'll give you an example............I got talking to this girl one time and all was going well and then I decided to carry out a little social experiment. She made some sort of dumb comment or made a bad joke or something like that and I laughed and said to her "Dont worry about it, I'll give you another chance", and I made it clear I was very much joking.
Well what happened next was an eye opener...........She changed completely, became serious and hissed at me "I'll be the one giving the chances around here, ok?"
This was the red flag and I left her to it, having nothing more to do with her. What she showed me in that moment was that she felt like she was in charge, that she was the "Employer" and I was the "Employee" who was required to jump through hoops and chase after her. I had reversed the paradigm and she was furious, offended even. That I would dare place her in the position that she thought men should be, i.e. a position beneath her. And shes not alone, so many women think like this, they've been raised by their mothers and aunts to think like this. So I think men need to be aware of this dynamic and not go along with it because even if you "Get the girl" for the moment, trust me, she will never stop making you jump through hoops and being a dancing monkey. Every man must overcome his own lust, this is what hands women power in the dynamic. Men are hungry for sex and will allow themselves to be manipulated by women because they know men are weak in this way. If you overcome this and get to the point where you are happy without sex(and you absolutely can get there) then watch what happens to that dynamic. Its an underlying shift that takes place and women will sense that they have no power over you. Some will become belligerent and try to passive aggressively attack you, bring you down, most wont be able to figure you out because they're so used to being in the "Employer" seat, it'll confuse them greatly.
Dude I am sure she was just offended because you were insulting what she said. It doesn’t matter if you tried to say it jokingly, it was still an unkind comment. And you saying I’ll give you another chance sounds condescending. She only said it back because you said it first. At most she may have been a bit over sensitive - it depends on the details. Can’t believe you made all that conclusion up because after you insulted her she got upset LOL!
OR she clocked immediately that you were trying to establish dominance and got her back up because she wasn’t interested in you after that. Women aren’t stupid and they talk amongst themselves.
Understanding social dynamics and recognizing people trying to exploit them for personal gain isn’t such a
high bar.
@Uncle_MC huh? Where in my comment did I say I was trying to establish dominance? Or where did I say I was trying to use her for personal gain? I think you've jumped to some random conclusions there my friend
dude.. i dont know what kind of analogy you went off on there but weman understand sarsacm much more as a hostile act then man who understand it as humorous.. thats one difference that keeps poping up in social research so please, keep it under your hat.
Great read. And great way to suss out her programming.
I’m GenX, it was relatively easy since women were told being promiscuous was empowering but they still weren’t likely to use regret assault charges on a guy. As a 6 at my very best I still lucked out and got an 8.5 once in awhile just because personality had much more of an effect back then. Now a guy looking like me wouldn’t get a swipe, and forget approaching in public. Guys who aren’t attractive, even if they are rich, simply have a harder time in the U.S.
Strauss is useless
Oh it’s most definitely looks. My best friend looks like Ken. The amount of women I’ve seen throw themselves at him is mind boggling. It happens so much he’s unfazed by it. A ten of a stripper came off the stage and slipped him her number. They didn’t know if he had money nor did they care
Who’s Ken?
@@grrinc Ken-touch deez nutz, bro.
It's not. If you are a simp then looks are not going to help you.
@@Raumance Its not possible to be a simp if you have 10 looks.
@@moviesynopsis001 It absolutely is and it's very common. If you have biceps and and are ripped but you are a simp it's over when you open your mouth. Looks aren't everything to a man.
This is the standard cope. It doesn't work like this. Personality is the more difficult part. Social skills. Success. It's far easier to get swole than to fix those thing. And it's a very common scenario to see.
Neil Strauss is a realist, and clearly believes in taking personal responsibility for the outcomes of one's actions. When used correctly, The Game was simply a collection of useful behavioural tools and strategies aimed at men who were experiencing disappointing outcomes when it came to meeting and dating women, as well as an invitation to question the received wisdom many men had unconsciously incorporated into their own mindsets. Good interview, Chris!
you mean manipulation?
PUA is a grift ... Imagine paying this guys and Mystery 10 K to hang out in Vegas to teach Keno Escalating ?
NGL that shirt is DOPE Chris! Always glad to see a fellow metal enjoyer.
Not saying they're classified strictly as metal, but when I heard he was a massive Sleep Token fan as well, I knew he was 100% a bro. BMTH was my favorite band for the better part of 5-6 years and were ultimately dethroned by Sleep Token in 2021 and I haven't been able to put them down since.
All that goes to say.. Excellence in all realms.
I just can't think of them other than being the gigachad theme song band, they've become a meme band...
This guy is right. High-value men are typically beta simps within money. High-value men are those individuals who exhibit overall strength, intelligence, mega fitness, formal education, wisdom, and calm confidence.
The bottomline is nothing is what it seems. It's true that the more things change the more they stay the same. There's nothing novel or new in dating when it comes to attraction. Charisma, affluence, and physical attraction are all the same factors they were 20, 40, 60, or even 80 years ago.
Social media and now everyone with an online device can listen and watch what they think is a depiction of dating culture in modern Western civilization. But it's just more of Hollywood fantasy and nothing grounded in reality. And of course porn has had its influence too because of its rampant consumption and availability on demand and free.
"Pick-up Artist"? Do you mean he paints murals on pick-up trucks? I don't see this guy as a chick-magnet.
Social media has changed the equation of attention. Also, the perceived value of any woman. What Neil did/wrote has nothing to do with today.
Neil Strauss and Mistery good times 🔥, I read the books
There is a biological and objective reality out there that is both crude and cruel. No need to pretend like it is any better and look for the morals in it or the deeper experience of the self. LMS is true every minute of the day. Nobody ever said it is all you need, but you can run an entire party life period on it. As a DJ, musician, athlete, bouncer, bartender, etc. You can have your own sorry subjective experience in private, while you're having unlimited access to sex and fun.
Never heard of LMS but I think it's more like SLM - status has to be #1. Lot of Rich guys who can't get girls too.
Straus is a goof, Mystery was a goof. Geeks with no game making up stories to make books at a time when good advice wasn’t available.
Its a challenge of signifiers and obtaining the signifieds to these 'status' signifiers. The minor issue is, women are born to deconstruct phallogocentric language because its not a feminine language. But women have observed over time, what man values, money, looks, and status, because these signifiers signal security in calories, pleasure and social standing. But its all an illusion.