For people on mobile. 00:01:57 The Pasteurized Milk of Bovines 00:03:07 The Oil of the Olives Virgin 00:06:13 The Slices of Baked Flour, Wheat & Watter 00:10:29 The Fishes of Gefilte 00:14:01 The Crackers of Matzos 00:19:20 The Sandwich 00:24:04 The Pickle of Deli 00:25:22 The Sodium Snacks of Onion Flavoring 00:33:21 The Can of Uruguayan Mystery Meat 00:40:00 The Pistachios 00:42:35 The Delicate Pear of The Asiatic Continent 00:46:30 The Sugary Baked Goods of Creme Filling Pin this please so people on mobile can see it.
The framed pictures really sell it - what are they of, what do they mean, why are they there - other than because "humans hang pictures on their walls"
Been watching this once a year at the very least since 2017.. In 2017 I started dating my best friend in the whole world, met her physically after my first long distance trip from Ohio to California via three days on a train. In 2018 I struggled, quit streaming, started a blog, ass end of the year I nearly died or so I thought. In 2019 I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis, it could have been worse but thankfully the universe was on my side. I managed to get a hold of my own problems, started voice acting in August on my birthday (the 9th) and I even conquered my fear of flying so I could visit my girlfriend in England - where she lives. In 2020 I'm a fully fledged voice actor who primarily narrates on TH-cam. I have more control over my condition now (no thanks to my doctors) and I'm also saving up money little by little. Thank you Rift for always being here..
a bit of a sob story, but my girlfriend just broke up with me, ive been suffering with depression and your videos make my life a bit happier and normal each day, thanks for being a great dude and helping me
You control your own emotions and feelings, if you feel better after watching these videos then it's because you decided to. Don't forget that my dude. It's all up to you, you get to decide. Hope you have a good day.
sharpes123 You can't control them but you can detach from them and learn how to prevent negative ones in the future. With the here and now all you can do is be mindful that it's happening and wide the wave. During this time people tend to partake in destructive behaviour, maybe just try riding the wave this time. You'll come back to shore eventually.
videos like this are the reason you're the only ASMR creator I'm subscribed to. Even after you have been making videos for years you never cease to show creativity and humor. keep up the good work.
I really needed this seriously, I got pulled over by a cop because my car's registry was expired, it got towed, was late for work, ended up getting me fired, now I have no car and no job, all this in five in the morning. at least I have this to calm me down
David Alejo you think your day was tough bro? I dropped my last slice of pizza at work today ... now that's rough For real thou, sendin some luck your way homie that's a shitty day .
You have something that I like, you look like a nice guy like one of those guys who go to work and say "good morning" to everybody or that guy who brings cake to the office and share with everyone
Dylan Wiseman so i searched bleach and went to channels and there were PAGES UPON PAGES of people with the names, Bleach, Clorox Bleach, Tide Bleach, etc... So I don't really get your point, although I do understand that to have your name as "bleach" is lame and kinda stupid.
Authoritarian Panda Breaking the 4th wall is when a character directly acknowledges the viewer or anything in the real world. But in this video, ER isn’t really playing one of his characters so there’s no wall to break imo
Aleksi134 did we watch the same video? He ate bread with olive oil, matzo, gefilte fish, a sandwich, funyuns, a pickle, two glasses of milk, four Oreos, fruit, more that I can't remember.
"Only difference between what I said and the actual grammar is h"..... what do you mean by this? Also, frankly*. Oh and by the way, I really don't care, I was just joshing you ;).
Ever made corn beef hash? Shred some Idaho potatoes, throw them in a skillet with some olive oil, throw in some diced up onions and peppers, then throw in the corned beef. Cook for 5-10 minutes and boom. Corned Beef Hash.
I love your 'eating' videos so much, they're probably my fav category - in the past few months especially, watching you eat so calmly helps me keep my own "dieting stress" down. Do you think you could someday make an eating video dedicated to healthy food like fruits and veggies and white meats and such, as a sort of motivator as well? I know many of us might have eating disorders (though in my case it's just me on a diet that gets hard to deal with on the long run), and I think it would relax us and motivate us at the same time Thank you again for all your contributions to my daily night sleep
When it comes to gefilte fish, eat it with something called chrain (it's a somewhat spicy horse radish mixed with beats that has the consistency of a dip) it's delicious when paired together.
Hay man, just wanted to say thanks for the Jewish representation! I’m so happy to see you partake in our cultures wonderful food. Just letting you know traditionally matzoh is eaten with what is called charoset or horse radish- usually in a spread form. I am glad you put the fish on the matzoh which not many people like to do. Also, u should try matzoh pizza. U take a piece of matzoh, put pizza sauce and your choice of cheese and toppings ( make sure their kosher!😂) and heat it up in either the oven or the microwave for about 1:30
Alright, I've got an AWESOME (In my opinion, obviously) idea for an ASMR video. It's about The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. In this game, there are characters called the Greybeards, who are like mentors in something called The Way of The Voice, which involves a lot of meditation. Uncle E could be a Greybeard, tending the viewer to calm them down and prepare them for the lessons and meditation.
Last night I was asleep, listening to Rift's last vid. My brother snuck into my room. And changed the video. To neon genesis evangelion's intro. AT MAX VOLUME. I HAD HEADPHONES ON.
"Your videos put me to sleep"
An insult to other TH-camrs
A compliment to Asmrists
Garfield!! Nise pic
I love this 😂😂
Same
Don't f with my head like this
FunkleDunk thank you Pizza Steve
That first "fucking" caught me so off guard 😂
Doncaster RUFC U16s omg yes, I actually went back 3 times to make sure he actually said fucking 😂😂😂🤣🤣
expect the unexpected with rift
He is supposed to be a friend and a friend wouldn't get shocked if you said fucking
Me too. Well, just once but surprised me. And Gonzo was hilarious.
Sammmeee dude
you could give this guy a potato and he will still manage to make a solid 40 min asmr video
Or four
darwido He actually made a "How to care for a pet potato" video.
Sgt. Eclair someone missed the memo
Kyuujin Yetto
My point exactly.
He was a talking banana at one point so I think this task would be ez gg for him
26:57 *voice cracks* HMM so how's life been
Aidan Medina 😂😂😂
HMM
Legit that cow sliding into frame at 3 minutes scared the heck out of me. I honestly thought it was some kind of ghost or demon lmao
QueenEtna Omg same!
Same bro!
Same 😂😂😂
I thought it was behind my phone but no.
Your editing is godly
crazyhours3 Why did you already see the ending of a 49 minute video 5 minutes after it's been uploaded?
Damian Skrok No I can just tell the editing is good and the video is gonna be good because of the start
crazyhours3 he's just godly in general
Poscy Oh well thank you very much
crazyhours3 as you say this er will descend from the heavens and give to you a heavenly pair of earbuds.
For people on mobile.
00:01:57 The Pasteurized Milk of Bovines
00:03:07 The Oil of the Olives Virgin
00:06:13 The Slices of Baked Flour, Wheat & Watter
00:10:29 The Fishes of Gefilte
00:14:01 The Crackers of Matzos
00:19:20 The Sandwich
00:24:04 The Pickle of Deli
00:25:22 The Sodium Snacks of Onion Flavoring
00:33:21 The Can of Uruguayan Mystery Meat
00:40:00 The Pistachios
00:42:35 The Delicate Pear of The Asiatic Continent
00:46:30 The Sugary Baked Goods of Creme Filling
Pin this please so people on mobile can see it.
Apathy ._. Why are you so nice?
You literally copy-pasted the fucking description you cancer eating fuck.
LE GRAND MASMAS The timestamps in the description don't work on mobile. Now that it's been pasted in the comments, it works.
The hero the world needs
Apathy ._. it's sammich not sandwich what kind of dummy says sandwich
"Maybe a couple of crickets" *shows the sport*
I love this dude
MAGTF167 get out more
Gumpert Hugh no u
MAGTF167
now I can't sleep. I wanna stay awake for the jokes
i swear this is the dankest vid he's ever made. i need Kevlar gloves for these edges
MAGTF167 lol same
You are like the cool uncle that my parents disapprove of
I would love for him to be my uncle lmao
Perruu
E is like that one uncle that actually understands modern comedy so is funny as hell
it feels like a meal with a friend who is trying to disguise the fact that he is an alien trying to integrate into human culture
spacefucker I read this at 3:25 lmao
spacefucker 😂
spacefucker your name man it’s just awesome I’m inspired
ur name fits sooo good to this comnent 🤣🤣🤣
The framed pictures really sell it - what are they of, what do they mean, why are they there - other than because "humans hang pictures on their walls"
You know it's a good Uncle E vid when
"I hope you're doing well"
"113 subscribers" Kek.
1k Subs with No Vids Challenge Ye not when he says sneaking up on a motherfuckers kitchen!
That was a good one aswell tho
"do you even know how to pronounce samich?" talk about a throwback
Gary Sirico what video was it?
I swear I c u in loads of different types of videos in the comments section
Lemonite I swear you're the most beautiful I've seen sleeping
:)
@@davidjohnson3433 ,
B .if
In my town we call it "Sandwich" so yeah
If Ephemeral Rift was in Tokyo, would he be called Ephemeral Drift?
Kim Jong Oink no but he would be calling your mom
Hunter 1213 what age are you?
He would be called Ephemeral Lift
Czar Panda eleventeen
Kim Jong Oink Depends, on speed mostly. Is he Ephemeral Swift?
i really liked this video
Same. I keep coming back
I Hope You're Doing Well©®™ too, Paul.
"I Hope You're Doing Well" is a trademark of Ephemeral Rift Co. Inc. LLC.
© Copyright 2012 - 2017 Ephemeral Rift Co. Inc. LLC. All rights reserved.
Dang.......
Friends of People as well as splentastic
Lee pretty much.
Nope Nopeman 🅱️opyright
22:34
Hands me a fork
"Here's a spoon for ya"
Holden Koschik lol
Must've been a Monday
I'm waiting for a "cracking open a cold one with the boys" ASMR
same
GomezUndercover yes
Unfortunately(?) it'd have to be rootbeers, Uncle E went cold turkey... back around the beginning of this year I think it was.
Cassie Moorecock he saud it was about halfway through December
Cassie Moorecock He cracked open a room temperature root beer in the 4th of July vid. :)
Been watching this once a year at the very least since 2017..
In 2017 I started dating my best friend in the whole world, met her physically after my first long distance trip from Ohio to California via three days on a train.
In 2018 I struggled, quit streaming, started a blog, ass end of the year I nearly died or so I thought.
In 2019 I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis, it could have been worse but thankfully the universe was on my side. I managed to get a hold of my own problems, started voice acting in August on my birthday (the 9th) and I even conquered my fear of flying so I could visit my girlfriend in England - where she lives.
In 2020 I'm a fully fledged voice actor who primarily narrates on TH-cam. I have more control over my condition now (no thanks to my doctors) and I'm also saving up money little by little.
Thank you Rift for always being here..
22:34 "here's a spoon for ya"
*hands fork*
Why is his fork a spoon?
Why is his spoon a fork
Fuckin Spork?
a bit of a sob story, but my girlfriend just broke up with me, ive been suffering with depression and your videos make my life a bit happier and normal each day, thanks for being a great dude and helping me
You control your own emotions and feelings, if you feel better after watching these videos then it's because you decided to. Don't forget that my dude. It's all up to you, you get to decide.
Hope you have a good day.
you can't control emotions, all you can do is accept them and let them go. You will heal faster that way.
I disagree with your statement on not being able to control emotions.
sharpes123 You can't control them but you can detach from them and learn how to prevent negative ones in the future. With the here and now all you can do is be mindful that it's happening and wide the wave. During this time people tend to partake in destructive behaviour, maybe just try riding the wave this time. You'll come back to shore eventually.
John4titude That went in the completely wrong directon...
videos like this are the reason you're the only ASMR creator I'm subscribed to. Even after you have been making videos for years you never cease to show creativity and humor. keep up the good work.
"There, here's a spoon for ya'" *Hands a fork* 😂
H E R E T H E R E S A S P O O N F O R Y A
Why is my fork a spoon?
for your information, i graduated from kindergarden 2 weeks ago
you are very smart, young zucc succ.
Man, I only graduated from 1st grade :/ man I'll never get up to kindergarten.
wow.. now u know how school is. Stay strong little man
Nice profile icon, onion games is the best!
the memes are strong in this one.
Well played, give this man a fuckin Oscar
I want to like this, but it's at 69 likes and I'm not sure
lets get this bread
Hello there
"It's like dog food for humans." The entire corn beef section just killed me. 😂😂
I really needed this
seriously, I got pulled over by a cop because my car's registry was expired, it got towed, was late for work, ended up getting me fired, now I have no car and no job, all this in five in the morning.
at least I have this to calm me down
David Alejo damn that's rough hope things start coming your way soon bud
David Alejo For what it's worth, I wish you some luck in life.
Dylan Wiseman much appreciated dude, hopefully they do
MinkyUrungus thanks for the good vibes man, hopefully my luck turns around
David Alejo you think your day was tough bro? I dropped my last slice of pizza at work today ... now that's rough
For real thou, sendin some luck your way homie that's a shitty day .
I want to have a beer with this guy.
Exploring With ASMR damn so true.
i dont know hes probably on several lists
Jay Davis-peel stfu
@@jaydavis-peel6421 All the better
Hey Rift. Try some horseradish with the gefilte fish. The red or the white are equally awesome!!! Great vid :)
Does anyone else find that doorway too the left creepy
Richard Davies very
Richard Davies I was staring at it! I thought I saw a shadow!
fuckboy
Now i see it, cannot be unseen
Dude ur suposed to watch the dude eat not the freaken doorway
literally the best amsrtist EVER
I don't know about you, but I'm pretty fucking happy with this upload
"I'm really fucking hungry right now" - Ephemeral Rift 2017
Me. I'm gonna use that as my senior quote XD
Mad One About now.
>XD
I guess you're nowhere near senior, huh buddy?
Between these comments and his edits, I'm dying.
Where did he say it at?
Apathy ._. 16 seconds in the video
You must have a patient wife.
Él Bláñd I wonder y lol.
His wife is not in the hospital ;-;
You make it feel like you are talking to a friend. And the way you do it is not awkward.
When he said "gefilte fish" I automatically thought of the scene in Rush Hour 2 with Chris Tucker lmao!
Random Roamer lmaooo i loved that scene i watched the rush hour movies like 20 times each
I honestly can't fall asleep with ER's videos. Can't stop laughing.
+DromZ don't we all need help
Do you think all asmrist eat like this by accident sometimes?
Pinkcreeper 😂probably
This is why I love this channel.
You have something that I like, you look like a nice guy like one of those guys who go to work and say "good morning" to everybody or that guy who brings cake to the office and share with everyone
Cool... But your sigma male dp is disappointing
Translations:
partake of the fruit
partake of the *Cocaine*
Eat duck pig horse
Duck pig *Cocaine*
samich'
*Cocain'*
rip vegetarians at the beginning
37:25 *gasp* RIFT!
Really?
@@Samstar369 some people also just skip through the video like complete D U M B A S S E S (I'm joking)
The instant replay of the corn beef killed me
I HOPE HE NEVER DIES!
Dude is that a warning?
Love your editing
Uncle ER should do a video with Dr.T 😷
Tingly bleach Yeah, change the bleach thing dude. You're a year late. It was hardly funny when it first started.
Dylan Wiseman so i searched bleach and went to channels and there were PAGES UPON PAGES of people with the names, Bleach, Clorox Bleach, Tide Bleach, etc... So I don't really get your point, although I do understand that to have your name as "bleach" is lame and kinda stupid.
I love how he says here is your fork and never returns it R.I.P Fork 2017-2017
11:27 "No Patrick, The lid, The lid, The lid, The lid"
I genuinely lol'd
T H E L I D P A T R I C K Y O U I D I O T
I know this is like five year old video. But I’m just loving it. I actually love Mazza with butter and jam it’s delicious
13:45 *Casually breaking the 4th wall*
The whole video is directed to the 4th wall...
I feel stupid but what’s that
Authoritarian Panda
Breaking the 4th wall is when a character directly acknowledges the viewer or anything in the real world. But in this video, ER isn’t really playing one of his characters so there’s no wall to break imo
38:26 Well, I was laying down with my eyes closed when this played and I assure you it didn't sound like what I thought it was.
This is the most social interaction I've gotten since the quarantine :O
i almost threw up at that gefilte fish zoom in. thanks uncle e
goober nunson right!? wtf is that shit
I love it when he swears
omg the moment I heard him swear at the corn meat had me dead 😂
Imagine him saying *fuck* for 30 minutes
When did he swear?
**S A M M I C H**
sandvich
Aardvarch
pussy
Bruce Wayne Really? All I did was make a joke, and **btw your weakness is literally the word Martha.**
Birdstar and Day robberies
Wow, I have no idea how you ate all of that food! You must have been about ready to explode after that. All in the name of ASMR, thanks ER!
Aleksi134 sammich*
Don't you realize that he was "fuckin hungry"
Aleksi134 did we watch the same video? He ate bread with olive oil, matzo, gefilte fish, a sandwich, funyuns, a pickle, two glasses of milk, four Oreos, fruit, more that I can't remember.
Yet you still can't spell sandwiches correctly, or "sammiches" as the memers would say
"Only difference between what I said and the actual grammar is h"..... what do you mean by this? Also, frankly*. Oh and by the way, I really don't care, I was just joshing you ;).
Ever made corn beef hash? Shred some Idaho potatoes, throw them in a skillet with some olive oil, throw in some diced up onions and peppers, then throw in the corned beef. Cook for 5-10 minutes and boom. Corned Beef Hash.
That sounds amazing 👌👏
TheChaoticSpartan X Don't you have to grind the corned beef first?
Sgt. Eclair Sometimes
Lol I live in Idaho and theres no such thing as Idaho potatoes. Just regular russet potatoes
I love your 'eating' videos so much, they're probably my fav category - in the past few months especially, watching you eat so calmly helps me keep my own "dieting stress" down. Do you think you could someday make an eating video dedicated to healthy food like fruits and veggies and white meats and such, as a sort of motivator as well?
I know many of us might have eating disorders (though in my case it's just me on a diet that gets hard to deal with on the long run), and I think it would relax us and motivate us at the same time
Thank you again for all your contributions to my daily night sleep
0:19 gasp* a swear. It’s honestly refreshing. Makes me feel like I’m with an old bud
Came here feeling drowsy. Left fully awake and reeeaaalllyyy hungry
In Spain we use the olive oil too. But, what is the price in your country? Tipically Mediterranian diet. It's like a "olive juice".
i just wanna remind you of this comment.
This was nice, we should do this again sometime.
Adolf Hitler I saw this and thought that when you commented, ER got a message on his phone that said "literally Hitler commented on your post"
The Lone Cookie HAHAHAHA LOL FUNNY JOKE XD
Zombieking 1236 your puns hurt me
I'm looking for my friend Kyle. I can't find him and it seems nobody has... Seen Kyle.
perhaps we should do this in the dining car of your train.
The man does the only eating asmr I can handle. It's just sharing a meal, not "mouth jam into mic smacksmacksmack"
The master of ASMR,I swear I fall asleep every time I’m ready to go to bed. your videos just make me so sleepy I don’t know how you do it.
Cow at 2:50 fucking scared the shit out of me
Maddie Allen Me too, holy shit. I finished my last prayer before I realized it's a freaking cow.
When it comes to gefilte fish, eat it with something called chrain (it's a somewhat spicy horse radish mixed with beats that has the consistency of a dip) it's delicious when paired together.
do you mix the two together or what?
17:02 the face you make when you eat at your vegan friends house mmmm cardboard cakes yum lol
Hay man, just wanted to say thanks for the Jewish representation! I’m so happy to see you partake in our cultures wonderful food. Just letting you know traditionally matzoh is eaten with what is called charoset or horse radish- usually in a spread form. I am glad you put the fish on the matzoh which not many people like to do. Also, u should try matzoh pizza. U take a piece of matzoh, put pizza sauce and your choice of cheese and toppings ( make sure their kosher!😂) and heat it up in either the oven or the microwave for about 1:30
“cheers to your health，mental，physical， oh and financial” lmao
Yay, Just in time for bed!
Its 5:43am in Singapore now.
Lol it's currently 11:50 pm in Germany, so this is perfect for bedtime.
Der Mikadomampfer same here in France. fun to see all the community going To sleep ^^
Bien, alors bonne nuit mon pote. J espère que tout va bien.
Lol here in Italy are 11:58pm
Andrea Baschieri
Sì, io dormo adesso. Buona notte fratello!
Just imagine he is talking to a 8 year old boy and everything gets a lot creepier
Pingu no, a 5 year old girl. Well, shit @-@
Turkey All the sudden... Out that doorway "I'm Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC"
Cant unthink it anymore.
Pingu lol
I think he has a kid around that age, why would that be creepy.
2:50 God, that gave me a scare haha
Lol me too
I dont know but your ASMR videos are the only videos that actually can relax me. Thanks for making these videos :)
Ur editing ..... deserves a Grammy to go along with ur food
Ephemeral Rift what happens to the food when u give it to the camera
Ross Quinn The camera consumes the food prolonging the cameras battery life.
MrJugsy To the Ainsley Harriott of the Rift
Preston Garvey no shhit
MrJugsy Little did Rift know, he was feeding SCP-106.
Preston Garvey I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU
Rift is a m e m e m a c h i n e
WindyMollusk T h e r i f t i s a d e a d l y l a z e r
6:14 “Lets get this bread”
It's 3 AM and this guy's comments on corned beef are the funniest thing to me right now.
What even is my life.
This editing...
Rift, you just became my top ASMRtist
He's like an awkward dad that comes home drunk😂😂 love it
Worlds funniest asmrist
ER: “See any movies lately? Been to any concerts?”
Me in 2020: uh...
This video is 6 years old and I still fall asleep instantly when I watch it
When this was uploaded I was here just for the corned beef. The #1 selling mystery meat.
2:22 "No thanks, pal. I'm severely lactose intolerant. I could literally die. Just pass me a water."
i once left a glass of milk on my window sill and when i came back the next day a spider had drowned in my milk.
thats how i want yo die
Bailey Long you should have drank it
Bailey Long just wanted to let you know you've achieved 69 likes
Two words: Balsamic vinegar.
Omg the sound of the breadddd
New to all this but this dude is the most cool person I have ever seen on youtube
Alright, I've got an AWESOME (In my opinion, obviously) idea for an ASMR video. It's about The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. In this game, there are characters called the Greybeards, who are like mentors in something called The Way of The Voice, which involves a lot of meditation. Uncle E could be a Greybeard, tending the viewer to calm them down and prepare them for the lessons and meditation.
Damian Skrok yes
Damian Skrok or even better, He could be a Greybeard teaching us ( the dragonborn ) how to whisper a new shout.
Damian Skrok that was terrible...
Yep..I'm into that idea thumbs up friend
Damian Skrok
dude, overexplaining
1 day before my birthdate guess you could say its an early ephemeral gift
this dude is a legend XD
I truly need more of this
PLEASE
I'm really happy that 80 thousand people stopped in to watch you eat :3 Love you ER
This is art
bownsir your art
Last night I was asleep, listening to Rift's last vid. My brother snuck into my room.
And changed the video.
To neon genesis evangelion's intro.
AT MAX VOLUME.
I HAD HEADPHONES ON.
Egg Benedict RIP
Rb Sj some brothers are complete bellends so you never know
Egg Benedict but did you die
Egg Benedict Condolences.
yoooo holy shit he's dead
*A Meal with a Friend (ASMR)*
Me:
*Friend (ASMR)*
Me, tears in my eyes: Truly beautiful.
Rift at his computer
*Looks between 2 buttons*
"Referencing your own channel's memes"
or
"Editing - maximum overdrive"
*Sweats nervously*
havent watched this channel in like a year or two and im glad this shit's still top quality