The first line hits deep. "I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head" I've been listening to this song since I was a teenager and it still resonates as I'm almost 30.
I'm sorry for your loss. My dad also loved this song because he said it reminded him of the relationship we had when I was using. Been clean 10.5 years now.
Lost my pops to ALS in February. Not saying it gets easier but you find ways to cope over time. Good to see you're still fighting. Dad would be proud bud❤️
I’m 8 years sober this year. I can’t hear this song without crying. It reminds me of me and my mother when I was using and all the pain I put her through. I never thought I’d be able to get sober at the time, even when I wanted to. I love my mom so much and she’s been so supportive all throughout my recovery. This song is beautiful and a reminder of where I never want to be again.
I'm sure she loved you the most upon her exit, if she's no longer around. I put my mother through the same but I'm sure on an elevated measure. She not only forgave me, but nor would she leave this Earth without my voice being the last voice she heard upon leaving. That my friend is what unconditional love is all about. Don't be hard on yourself. Your mother's love is what forever is all about. Sending blessings your way. Stay strong.
I was a homeless fentanyl addict for 6 years, and this song was always on my playlist because he said, "I'm sober now for 3 whole months..." and I looked forward to finally saying that. I just celebrated 2 years clean, and my life is amazing now.
What kills me is that almost 13 years later this song still pulls on my heart. To all those still struggling the long battle of depression, you're not alone. The fog will lift.
@@joshriley1955 It might not lift, but maybe you can learn to live with it. Don't search for eternal happiness but a point where you can say ok, I can live with this.
I'm so sorry, it's so hard! My husband of 30 years died on November 1st.... I'm not sure how to function without him 💔 take care of yourself the best you can.....🤗
@@georgiaross6741 I'm so sorry. Iwas with my husband for 30 years too. He passed January 2020. I wish I could tell you it gets easier, but it really doesn't. You do learn to cope though. He was my whole world.
My name is Nat. I'm a 40 year old female who is also a recovering opiate addict. I'm posting here to let anyone who needs to hear this know, there is always hope! I spent all of my 20s and most of my 30s chasing a high. June 10th, 2024 was 6 years and 5 months clean for me! Whatever demons you're battling, please know you're not alone. Each of us has a demon or demons we're fighting every single day. Wherever you are, whoever you are, just know this random woman right here is sending you love, positivity, and hope for better days ahead. My life today is a testament to that!
Nat, that is so awesome ❤ I love this song and I love the part where he says he has been sober for 3 whole months 💙 because I want to be able to say that. I am a meth addict and this drug and demon is trying to take everything I have but starting today I am Goin give it one hell of a try to stop. Like run to be clean as much as I ran to chase that high. I need me a sponsor. I am thankful that I will be on your mind. Your comment meant so much to me. I had always listened to country but when I started getting high my music range changed and that's how I found this song.
@@amandamcgraw2586 Hang in there you matter in this world you can help others please help me to help other people so there families don't go through this it's not easy losing my baby!
Lost my mom to addiction almost 2 years ago. This song hits harder now than ever. I am now becoming an addiction counselor in May after receiving my degree. I hope wherever she is she knows I love her and did this for her. ❤
my condolences to you your mother knows the love you have for her whenever you feel alone talk to her it helps and congrats on the new career we need more like you
Tauney Elysia The line that makes me break down is, “You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take.” No matter how many times I listen to this song, I sob. If you’ve ever struggled with an addiction or love an addict, this song hit you right there in the most tender part of your soul.
I can finally understand why my husband listened to this song the last few months of his life. He didnt suffer from addiction rather a brain tumor. I whole heartedly believe he knew he was going to die soon. And I think in his way of dealing with his own mortality became the realization that I would be left to pick up the pieces for our kids and I and I think he thought if I was mad at him it would make it easier for me to move forward. Its been almost 3 months and it hasn't gotten easier at all. Im drowning. But this song weirdly brings me peace and some understanding of his mindset and clarity on some of our last conversations.
@@samied5527 I can relate. I think people who listen to billy eillish probably have a brain tumor. I think that should be a question asked in medical facilities. Do you find yourself listening to billy eilish and even enjoying the music - if yes = possible a brain tumor case. She could go down in history for being the best way to detect a brain tumor.
If you're reading this and crying as I am, just hold on. Please, just hold on one more day. You are loved. You have so much love and life to give, just give it one more day.
Damn seeing all these comments of people being clean just makes me happy for you all! Keep up the good fight no matter how hard it gets! Love to you all!
YES! Addiction isn't easy on anyone! So proud of ppl who are staying clean and working on themselves!! Keep up the wonderful and yet hard work of staying sober!!
Believe it or not, today is the first time I heard this song. It was among a platlist I was listning to. I've listen to it 4 times so far and it has really hit me. By the grace of God I have been clean for 33 years and the emotions are still there of the fear and pain I put my mom through. My mom has been gone for 22 years now and I miss her everyday. She not only gave me life but helped save it. Although she died from cancer I can never get the thought out of my head that I might of shaved a few years off her life. I am grateful that she saw me clean, get married and I was able to give her a grandson that she could enjoy for a few years. She is always in my heart and I hope to be with her again when its time. To anyone struggling out there, don't give up and fight everyday. It's a wonderful life!
I’m proud of you and I know your mom is proud of you too man, I don’t know you but I love you and I wish you a long happy life with your wife and kids. You got this!
Keep on fighting everyone I battle silent wars with myself every day I never thought I could be good enough to have somebody now I have a step daughter and looking into her eyes makes my want to keep pushing on everyday. There is light at the end of every dark tunnel sometimes we have to fight hard to see it I feel for everyone who has depression
I never knew that was really his Mom crying over him. When I saw that interview it hit the feels hard. I lost my 23 year old son, Joshua, last year to suicide. I would never want any mother or father to know this pain. I’m so glad Justin has made it through the drugs and depression. As someone that deals with suicidal self-hate myself, I know the battle with depression is never totally over. But I’m so glad Justin has gotten to such a good place with all his internal demons. His Foiled, AMIA album plus the song Fear got me through my divorce 6 years ago. I’ve since found the love of my life, but now I’m dealing with the daily heart-swallowing pain of the loss of my son. I live each day for my other children and hubby. That’s all. Peace to you all.
Im so sorry for your loss. My brother also chose to end his life so I keep on keeping on knowing I'm my parents last remaining child and they need me to stay here. Sending love to you and yours.
My husband and I have been in recovery since April 2, 2008. This song helped me through a lot of darkness and guilt, and many of Blue October's other songs helped me in the intervening years. We've seen him in concert with the rest of the band 5 times, and have met Justin several times. We finally got the chance to get VIP tickets to his Open Book Tour, which allowed us a few minutes to speak with him, personally, and tell him how much he'd helped on our own road to recovery. Shaking his hand and thanking him to his face was an amazing experience, and like the truly good person he is, he was gracious and amazingly receptive. He must hear it a dozen times a day, but in that moment, we felt like he heard us and was proud to have played a role in our sobriety. His humility is awesome to witness, and even after all of this time, we remain huge fans, and we're now 14 years sober.
Mel, that's amazing! You and your hubby rock and I love this for you both. I know the struggle myself, and it's no joke. The sheer strength it takes to remain sober comes from so deep . Keep fighting and working it. You're in my thoughts.
This song has had so many meanings to me throughout the years. It never gets old, and I play it on repeat at times. I was pregnant with my son when I heard it for the first time. It was extremely rough to hear, but the two of us are here today together and thriving.
With you! Keep fighting and see the good even when it's hard and it hurts. Do the best that you can. You are here for a reson even if it hasn't shown itself yet.
My momma played this song constantly while i was growing up...she was so loving and did the best she could for me but she battled with addiction....she was found dead in a creek in mississippi and i find myself taking everything to feel nothing because it hurts so bad...please pray for me and my family.
best of luck I hope things get better it hurt to lose people to drugs and it makes you want to do drugs, I get high a lot but at least I'm not doing pills. Just strive for better and try to get help. My brother was the same we were both based and he found drugs to cope with it after it got really bad for him where he almost died I said fuck it a joined him. I've been sober off morphine and opioids for a year now and pills for 4 months. You can do it you just gotta believe!
My mother is an addict, and I have a no contact order, I know some day I'm gonna get the call that shes gone. Its hurts. She wasnt always a bad mom, but she just cant get clean and isnt safe around my kids. I hope you find peace, in whatever way you can, and I hope you know that there is NOTHING you could have done. Its ugly, addiction, and it destroys families, but none of it was ever your fault
This has to be one of the most underrated unappreciated songs ever written. When there is honesty and emotion there is absolutely electric vibes that make a song an unforgettable hit. This song has so much meaning to me, lost friends of overdose, suicide, depression. It's never easy to explain or express those feelings and or thoughts. Please don't forget how important each of you are, and if you need support please talk to someone. I know first hand that, when my step mom committed suicide she was in so much emotional pain and thought it would leave with her. Believe me, it didn't, it amplified and spread to all 5 of us kids, and several grand children. We miss her deeply. I've never talked about anything this this before online. But today I felt like in October 2021 we could all use love and support. I just want to spread positive thoughts and vibes to everyone in the comments. I have a saying, it's Make your own luck. I believe in that. Have a blessed day 🙏❤️
I love this. My quote to guide me through is "Don't ever let your light burn out. There is so much darkness in the world that can blow you away; but the more light that shines, the more good that becomes. Shine bright and be strong. There are others that need that light."
My little brother always said this was our song. Growing up in broken homes full off alcohol and every kind of drug. I went down the dark road to escape the sexual abuse and physical abuse. Being the problem since we were born. I think of him every time I hear this. I got clean and sober in 2014. Broke sobriety in March 2024 after having my daughter stillborn.
This was my dads favorite song, he struggled my whole life with drugs and depression, I'm 30 now. We lost him 5 years ago. Every time I come back to this song I feel him with me.
I'm sorry for your loss I lost my mom in 2015 to alcohol addiction and my baby sister who was 24 to her sh*t being laced because she wanted to leave the man she was with for her husband and get clean in 2018
Sorry to hear that..sorry for your loss.. I struggled with heroin for years. I did ten dollars worth that ended up being fentanyl and almost died and was revived with narcan. As sick as it sound it saved me and I found God. Drugs are the devil on earth.
I hope that you know that while your dad, may he rest in paradise, fought his demons, that he loved you more than you’ll ever know. (God put this on my heart to tell you)
I am 7 years clean and sober this year. This song got me through so many of my dark days. If you're struggling, I BELIEVE IN YOU. I promise life gets so much better 😭
37, bpd. Heard this song in my teens... Still come back to this when I get this low.. Appreciative that something musically understands my pain. Love to all reading this.
I love this song it's so beautiful I love how Justin expresses himself so dark as he is feeling...reminds me of my life and meds betrayal and pain and then my last true love in a shirt time I loved him so fast and he left my side I don't c anyone now in my path it's like I have scales on my eyes...I love how he walks to the cemetery and has his glasses on and head held high... I love you blue October beautiful song so deep so amazing I relate to each scene and all the pain....beatriz
I am the mother. This song is therapy for me, I sing it as loud as I can when things are rough and are getting to me mentally. It helps me know I am not alone. It also gives me hope to see where Justin is now.
I love this song, it makes me cry every time I hear it. It has all the human elements that hit us straight in the heart. God bless you, and of course Justin
@@janielopez6868 if you don't understand than it ain't for you babes It's the type of song that you either relate with and understand or that cha don't Most of us in the world feel as if the song was written just for and about us Cause certain music/songs you "hear" with your *ears* and than there's such as like this one that you just "feel" with your *soul* and entire being
Bro I heard this song when I was young, before I ever had thoughts of pain or anguish or suicide or suffering. Hearing it again at 30 after drug addiction,divorce, and 3 suicide attempts then finally freeing myself from drugs and trying to piece it back together and it being to late to save my relationship with alot of people including my wife. Just has me sitting in my job like tearing up. I'm sober and healthy today but shit what a life we survived huh...
Sometimes (usually around 3 in the morning- something about 3 am)I can't decide if what I have left was worth the war I waged to "survive". Most of the time I know that survival is ultimately worth any cost but I just lost so much over the years. No, "lost" isn't the right word; "wasted" is the more honest word choice. By choosing years of intense alcoholism and drug use, I wasted so many chances and opportunities in life. Don't get me wrong, I was somehow more functional than many people are.. I raised both of my kids while working 50+ hour weeks, never losing custody of then to social services. I worked as hard as I played. But I was also moody and irritable, often bad tempered and demanding. I chose to live 1200 miles from any immediate family in order to more easily hide my addictions and habits. The cost? I barely know my family anymore and they hardly know me. I didn't really feel the pain of separation or loneliness until my kids were grown and moved out. And they unfortunately learned their idea of "normal" from me; I rarely ever hear from them though I love them more than life itself and would give anything to be invited into their worlds. They're happy enough to hear from me when I'm able to catch them with a few spare minutes to talk; there was never a falling out or hard feelings between us. They just watched me create and maintain a certain distance from my family for so long that it seems normal to them for us to only see one another a few times a year and to talk on the phone when they "think about it." I'm simply not necessary to their existence or happiness. I'm very proud of them both but would give anything to be actually WANTED or NEEDED- to be an important part of their lives. But I'm eternally grateful that they turned out so well. It had to be God's Hand on them because I certainly didn't make great choices. I'm two years clean now and struggle daily to find a reason to remain so. So far I'm winning but don't know if this soul-deep sadness is sustainable in the long run substance free. For now though I keep trudging through the mire, always hoping to one day wake up and find happiness again. I wish joy, strength, and purposeful living to everyone out there; thank you so much for reading all this... Peace ☮️ and Love 💗 Always!!
Man. I feel this comment bro. I’m 35. I was a freshman in high school I think when this song came out and I could only attribute it to breaking up. I’ve heard this a million times but it was just still playing in the airwaves at the time. Well it’s been like 10 yes since I heard it. And lemme just say everything you said…yep. I felt that like 1000%
still can't listen to this 10 years later without crying. It's the most soul-touching song i've ever heard and i've yet to find another that hurts me the same way. I love you, sorry for all the things I didn't do, for you.
This song is so full of feelings, so full of meaning. Even the singer is so touched by it that he hurt his finger playing it during the video making. That was not staged, it actually happened. This song is what I sing silently to many members of my family and acquaintances/partners that I failed to along my life.
Summer Fender Did they include the part where he hurt his finger while recording the video? If yes, would you mind telling me at what time it happens? I watched again but didn't see it. Either way, I agree that you can literally feel the emotions from him coming at you right through the screen. Almost feels like he's staring right at me while singing and that the song was written for me.... It's so weird I know, but I can't think of another song that has had such a crazy affect on me.
+Christina Sanders Check from 3:17 to 3:45. You can see his middle finger all bloody from the cords friction. And we feel the same way about the song, that probably means we have deep, good feelings haha.
I have had such a hard time lately physically, mentally, and emotionally. I am so exhausted. It’s 1:30 am and i’m crying to this song after seeking it out for the first time in forever. Over a decade later and it still hits so hard 🖤 for everyone else out there struggling: you are loved, you matter, and you are stronger than you think you are. We will get through this.
My dad died of an od 24 years ago, I followed in his footsteps years later... I've od, 3 times.. my teenage son found me... the hate that a heroine addict feels towards themselves is crippling... 4 months clean now ... one breath at a time ... congrats to all of you that have found your way to back..
Thank you all... it really does get easier. NEVER did I think I would hear myself say those words... the depression has subsided a Lot.. not saying I don't still have difficult days... I am 7 days away from my 7 month :-) this song here is part of my music therapy... with every breath, every min, every hour and every day.... those of you fighting this fight, stay strong
I remember this song came about just as I entering my early twenties adulthood. A few years later in my late twenties, I started to begin to understand the meaning behind the song. Addiction, unconditional love, recovery. At first, I thought it was about my own struggles my mother supported me through. Now, in my mid-thirties, I realize that it's the other way around. But I imagine this what my mother might think of me now. I've struggled with alcoholism the past year and I'm sure I've put a lot of weight on her shoulders without knowing it. Remembering this song randomly tonight made me realize I have to do better by my mother. Thank you for this song, Blue October. From my young adulthood to becoming a middle-aged man, the lyrics and meaning behind your songs have given me the perspective I've needed throughout all these years.
My cousin hung himself in June 2013, and this song was one of his favorites. He used to get me to play it every time we'd go out riding around. This year makes it ten years since then. Love ya, Matt.
RIP for all of those who did not surive the silent battle of depression and hang in there to those who are fighting it currently, words from a fellow warrior: it gets better ❤
When the weight of yesterday has a grip on you.. Know that your pain and suffering can be a motivator to find the best version of you.. Always know your life matters.. Despite the failure of our past..
my mom lost her battle with mental health July 20th 2023, this song was the first real thing that made me process her passing and gave me my first, real, big cry over it. i had to be strong for my older sisters and for my moms loved ones and so i packed all my feelings away until i made her memorial video to play at her funeral, and this song was one of three i used .... and i broke. i always loved this song growing up, but now ... now i have a whole new love for this song!
This song is the perfect description of the devastating consequences of addiction, especially to loved ones trying to help. I always liked this song because of the message, the journey it takes the listener on and the visceral reation caused by it. Very raw and simply an outstanding piece of artwork.
This song is the reason I’m sober and alive today. Godbbless to this band. Both parents overdosed. I’m all I got and I’m single mom but this song helps me every day.
This was me and my mother’s relationship for so many years....nights she stayed by my side praying I wouldn’t stop breathing. I put her through hell and I’m just glad she never gave up on me. A mother’s love for her child is endless.....
I feel you. A mothers love. I put my family through hell. My wife stuck by me my son wouldn't talk to me for months. Good women in your life is a god send. Stay strong.
I had the privilege to Meet Justin and Jermey last night! Unbelievable experience. This man has kept me alive for 14 years. I struggle with Major Depression. Well last night I was able to tell him this. He looked up at me and said “You have the most beautiful eyes! 😢❤. I shook my savors hand, one of my hero’s. Thanks you to the entire band. Seen you all on Aug 2, 2024 in Clearwater, FL! The sound was amazing!
one of the most painful things for me EVER was deleting old voicemail messages from my mother and deleting her phone number from my phone. always hurt when scrolling through and seeing her name... and wanting to call and talk to her one last time. here i am, almost 50 years old... lost her 12 years ago... and eyes watering and pain in my heart every time i listen to this song, watch this video, and read all your comments. one thing i try to explain to younger people... NEVER take for granted the love of your parents. appreciate everything they are and everything they do. enjoy your time with them and try to never have any regrets. it will eat you up inside later on ...when its too late.
Im also in my 50's and so much regret deleting voice messages my mom would leave. especially the last one of her wishing me a happy birthday and telling me about the day i was born. I never thought she would pass away the next day. I miss her so much and her lovely voice. So many times when she was alive i would take the time we had for granted thinking we had many years to come and not doing or spending quality time with my mom. I miss you mom, im sorry.
now my son is doing the same as i did with my mom. I feel that one day he will also feel how im feeling now. im praying that it doesnt but its seems to be heading in that direction.
Not in recovery myself, but I started dating a girl last July who was in recovery(alcohol). She relapsed in May and did a 30 day rehab. I visited and tried to support her however I could. She got out on Memorial Day. The next day she went on a drinking binge and never came home that night. Her sponsor found her and took her back to rehab. She's doing another 30 day stint and may move back to sober living when she gets out. She told me this past weekend that she still loves me, but she can't be in a relationship right now. It's killing me because all I want to do is be there for her. I have to let her do what she thinks is best for her health. I'm dying inside, tho. Just wanted somebody to hear it. Much love, y'all!❤
All I can say is this song touches my heart and soul. I lost my only child, my son Danny to a drug overdose. I found him 10 hrs too late, Please don't stop fighting, please don't leave your mom, it hurts like hell. You fought the good fight, sweetheart... I will always be your proud mom. #forevermissed #forever23
I know how this feels, I desperately miss my little sister because of this stupid deadly drug too. I'm so darn sorry you feel this too because it's hard.
so sorry my son also put a gun to his hea over his wife stpd lovn him then5mo later my nef nits all crazy i feel ya so sorry its like they hated it here
The older I get the harder this song hits. Like many on this thread I suffered from addiction, heroin addiction specifically. Time and time again my loved ones found me passed out, OD'd, wondering if this would finally be the end. I'm still wracked by the guilt of forcing them to watch the self destruction. The friend I used with, we relapsed, and he didn't make it out alive. I'm sober now, but sometimes I can't help but think he had to pay the price for that. There is no song that really encapsulates the feelings I felt then this one.
Man that part where his finger is bleeding from hitting his strings so hard... that’s raw emotion.. This is more than just a song for him you can tell.
I’m 32 and can’t get over my first gf, I had a hard life and she was the only one I believed truly loved me, confused by my life I let her go. Every time I hear this song it reminds me of the best moment of my life that I ruined… she used to love this band ❤ juju
My mother is going through dementia and most things she remembers in our conversations are negative things that I went through with her growing up. But I know she loves me and is proud of me from the experiences and discussions we had as an adult. This song plays on repeat in my mind when she says something that I did when I was rebellious. Despite the put down I always cherish her and love and respect her even though in my younger days I resented her because I was a son of divorce, and lost my father at a young age.
I have to block out thoughts of you So I don't lose my head They're crawling like a cockroach Leaving babies in my bed Dropping little reels of tape To remind me that I'm alone Playing movies in my head That make a p#rn% feel like home There's a burning in my pride, A nervous bleeding in my brain An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again? And will you never say that you love me Just to put it in my face? And will you never try to reach me? It is I that wanted space Hate me today Hate me tomorrow Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you I'm sober now for 3 whole months It's one accomplishment that you helped me with The one thing that always tore us apart Is the one thing I won't touch again In a sick way I want to thank you For holding my head up late at night While I was busy waging wars on myself, You were trying to stop the fight You never doubted my warped opinions On things like s**c*de or hate You made me compliment myself When it was way too hard to take So I'll drive so f*ck*ng far away That I never cross your mind And do whatever it takes in your heart To leave me behind Hate me today Hate me tomorrow Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you Hate me in ways Yeah, ways hard to swallow Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave Kicking shadows on the street For every mistake that I had made And like a baby boy I never was a man Until I saw your blue eyes crying And I held your face in my hand And then I fell down yelling "Make it go away!" Just make a smile come back And shine just like it used to be And then she whispered "How can you do this to me?" Hate me today Hate me tomorrow Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you Hate me in ways Yeah, ways hard to swallow Hate me so you can finally see What's good for you, for you, for you, for you.
>> everyone here understands whatever pain you’re going thru No, they don't. You had to be there to get the joke. -Clean & sober twenty years this coming October
This song still kills me to this day. I was just newly sober when it came out and I listened to it all the time. Around that time my marriage had recently ended and my addiction played a role in it falling apart. This song really mirrored my life at the time. I’ve been sober ever since and I thank God everyday for the strength to stay clean.
I remember being in FL as well when this song came out. It sure spoke to me then, but I wasn't sure why. I was very young. I wasn't ready to get sober, but a decade later I realize why this song was so profound at the time. I'd drive "so fucking far away" and play this song on repeat if I had the means.
My best friends brother sent this song to his mom days before he lost his battle to addiction. He expressed how he related to this song because at times he wanted his family to hate him so they wouldn’t worry about him anymore. This song was mentioned at his funeral. Every time I hear this song I see him and his struggle and his family. Please if you’re struggling please don’t give up that fight. Do it for yourself. Do it for the people who will loose their lives mourning your death. You are loved. Life is hard but you just have to keep fighting no matter what. Don’t give up please I’m begging you, it’s not worth it.
My son's name was cody I woke up and found him dead on my bedroom floor from a heroin overdose mixed with fentanyl home from rehab 34 days just one more time Mom I wish I would've broken his knee to keep him from leaving this will haunt me forever just one more time
Oh God I'm trying so fucking hard! If I don't get over my husband's past infidelity from back in April I'll be gone I've had enough with childhood trauma, being the family disappointment, being alone all my life with no one to hear my cries. Forgiveness is one thing but remembering and trying not to compare myself to the other woman is another thing. I fight demons in my head every single day my head is like a prison.
I was suicidal for 5 years. i've been going through depression for 10 years and i was diagnosed with anxiety at 16. I hated myself for so long and just wanted to end everything.. But i got help and my mom and dad were my biggest supporters. Now, I'm 19 years old and still chugging along and living my life the best that i can. I am also 3 years clean from self harming and i can say, I am beyond proud of myself 💜
My son died January 10, 2022, from complications of drug addiction. Not an overdose, but an infection. There are times when I feel so guilty over things, but this song helps me so much. It reminds me of why things were the way they were. It reminds me of how hard I tried to be there for him, and it reminds me that he knew I loved him very much. 💙
I had a friend. He was so great. I was sad one night & he was too. He sent me this song. He passed away. Now this song hits me like concrete. I miss you Reigh.
"You never doubted my warped opinions On things like suicidal hate You made me compliment myself When it was way too hard to take" Ouch. I still can't listen to this without crying. I saw Blue October live many years ago and sobbed like a baby... the lyrics hit home then, and they still do today 💔
"i'm sober now for 3 whole months that one accomplishment that you helped me with... the one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing i won't touch again" 2016 i put the needle in my arm for the last time got on a plane and it was finally over
If you don't drink for a solid year, you can be it over time. Real talk......IF you relapse after the year sober of alcohol, chances are it will make you sick to drink by year 2 you should be "recover ed". Stop drinking for 1 year, try it. Safely though. I don't know your alcohol intake though as of now.
At first when i saw the comments, i thought 'wow there's a lot of darkness'. Then i saw it through a wider lens and realized it was all light. I'm so glad we're all still here ❤
When you read the first couple of lines in a lot of comments it is a bit dark, but you read on and see that there's light, this song is dark in subject matter but it says that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Thanks God for the moms that never let up or let us get too far out in the deep end.......most people think that's annoying blows em up always askin how they are or if they need to talk.....cuz i promise ya once that phone never rings anymore cuz that persons fight in life is done you'll miss every min of the lil annoying things they did the most......society molds people into assuming or associating annoying habits with a insecure or needy person when that couldn't be further from the case......people that call or try to see how you are even when we're being difficult human beings that my friends is that true unconditional love that so many people are so busy tryin to find that they dont notice it right in front of their face until its gone
HideousAngel Everyone has something. We’re all in this together. Be kind. Stay strong. Take a deep breath. Take a moment. Take a nap (who doesn’t love naps) Tomorrow will look better. I promise you this.
And there are so many of those rat faced bastards out there it makes me physically and mentally sick... be strong live as whatever god you keep,and be blessed. Just believe
Drug addicts are not like the rest of us. They're not human. They're humanoid mutants. They infest urban areas and prefer to reside in filthy and decayed or dilapidated conditions. They use public washrooms for consuming drugs instead of shitting or pissing. They should be exterminated and purged from the planet.
@@ethanmaccullouch2776 - not all do those things n remember everyone struggling is someone's mother/father/sister/brother/daughter/son/husband/wife; you HAVE NO IDEA the suffering that drove one over the edge until you've lived it n have NO ROOM TO JUDGE - everyone has a vice, some thrice, the hell of pain n suffering one's subjected to is merely a roll of the dice; WE'RE ALL ONE MISTAKE AWAY FROM A TOTALLY DIFFERENT LIFE❣🙏
This song accurately describes my entire childhood. During my parents' divorce, I distanced myself emotionally from my mother because she was tearing the family apart. I was trying to make it easier for her to abandon us in a selfish way. It worked, and I've been unable to learn to love again. If you are divorcing, NEVER force your kids make the decision to forsake one of their families on your behalf. Both of my parents failed my brother and I. We ended up raising ourselves because of neglect, and we're scarred because of it. My father and mother were both narcissists, so I was raised as a burden to the family. My unit stopped me from taking my own life and God intervened for me. But my point is parents shape the foundation of their children's understanding of themselves. Mine forsook me and it lead me down a dark path, don't do the same.
Hearing his mom's phone message brings me to tears everytime... miss my mom so much! Thank you mom and dad for never placing judgement on me EVER! Thank you for loving me unconditionally!
For a lot of people this song speaks to their addiction, for me its my own habits and choices outside of drugs and alcohol. Everything about this song reminds me of by gone days of choices made that turned into mistakes. This song legit makes me cry these days.
I really wish you the best man and am glad she helped you but addiction is so hard to overcome no matter how much you love someone, it just sometimes isn't enough. So you have to be strong and do this for yourself and get yourself better before jumping into a relationship. Stay friends for now but until you have been sober for at least a year sometimes longer, you shouldn't do it for anyone but you bc if this relationship should go bad then if you were not okay being by yourself sober, you risk a higher chance of relapse. And if it is meant to be with her, she will be there to support you and understand that you have to do this for you and only you can keep you sober. There will be a roller coaster of emotions from anger to sadness to happy to frigging mad at the word and don't know why. And you have to be good for you before you can be good for her. Good luck and I will be pulling for you bud. You stay strong. Go to meetings get a.support system that know what you are dealing with and want to help you and not judge you.
things that aren't important and things you don't fully grasp when you are young , you will realize differently when you are older. you realize everything you took for granted were the things you made important ..and you end up with regrets and realize how differently you should have felt and done thing
Man the tears that fall when this song plays. I try to hate you dad, but I can't it hurts. I don't know where u are or if ur still alive, but I love you and hope ur sober.
Dear younger me, I am so proud of you for not going through with it. We’re still here, we fought and stuck it out. & Thank God we did because we have a beautiful little girl and a wonderful husband and life is beautiful than ever. We’re breaking cycles. We’re ok.
I used to listen to this song all the time with my mom, on the way to school, on the way to the park, Just all the time. In 2015 she died from diabetes and kidney failure when i was 9, and for a while I couldnt bear to hear it. But now I'm 17 and last year I started getting back into it and this song is now the closest I get to feeling like she is back. It hurts sometimes but this song brings back some of the happiness I felt when I was a kid.
Sounds like you are finally processing the loss. I lost my Dad at 18. We didn't have a song, but it took me decades to accept that he was gone. Still makes me sad thinking about it, and it's been 30 years. I believe we'll see our loved ones again. I couldn't go on if I didn't have that belief.
Good job man that’s what you need to do you take music in you turn it around to be good for you it’s terrible when you turn it around the other way and it’s sad when you hear a song you think about somebody the song should celebrate that person and that’s a good song what if you can celebrate somebody’s life with that song you got it brother God bless you and sending you love and light Namaste
Lots of love in here. Dont see that much anymore. To all of you staying sober, I'm proud of you. Love to see someone win!! To all battling depression, missing someone, feeling lost, I hope you can put your mind at ease and dont be scared to put on a good tune and cry it out!! it does wonders!!
Love and thanks. Even after 29 years clean, as well as having depression issues, words like these mean A LOT to me. To the point that after hear this song again the eyes get damp, but this time with happiness at the understanding and care.
Veteran that use to struggle with ptsd this song really hit home. I use to drive a wedge from feeling anything. Christ really helped heal me. Don't give up hope. Jesus loves you and will heal you like he did me.
This is a very dark and raw song. I like the musicianship, Justin's singing, the production. I can't imagine how it feels to those for whom the lyrics apply and have real meaning to their life experiences.
I feel like this song is for all of us mothers out there whose babies are struggling with addiction/depression. It's a struggle that can be lost or won at any single second of any single day. 💔
I am one. Alcohol has been my water for the past 10 years.. daily. I wake up every morning and work my full 40+ but when I get home, the bottle is there. What hurts me is, I make an excuse of not visiting my loved ones just to have a brew. Resolutions are hard. I've failed time and time again. But cut backs are much easier. I've been sober now for 5 days. Gunna definitely have a couple this weekend. Then, back to dry. Moderation counts! And I can spend more time with my Mom❤
I was only a toddler when i last saw my biological father. He died of an overdose when i was five. I always hated myself and felt like i wasn't good enough, not even for my own father to stick around. I wished that maybe one day he would sober up and be a part of my life. but then he died of an overdose before we ever got the happily ever after i longed to have. I hated him my whole childhood for leaving and vowed i would never let myself love him. but now im 13 with depression and i understand how bad it hurts, and how he just wanted that moment of bliss he got from the drugs. he desperately needed a way to let himself smile and laugh and an escape from all the pain. Now that I am much older i cant help but love him and forgive him, and i hope he will be waiting for me at the gates of heaven where our happily ever after can really come true ( i was adopted by a guy who completely fell in love with my mother and gave me all the love in the world. he means so so very much to me. he will always be my dad. but everyone tells me i shouldnt want a relationship with my biological father because I have my dad and i understand where they are coming from. but i want both i know that sounds selfish but i love the man who stepped up to be my dad when I needed one most but at the same time I would have also loved to build a relationship with my biological father someday)
This song makes me think of my mother, God bless her, she married a good but broken man, who then gave her 2 good but broken sons who fell into addiction with their dad. Who needed their mom to keep them alive when their dad died too early from those drugs, who helps those 2 good but broken sons with their own kids, so they don't become broken. Mother's cannot be praised enough
I cry more for my mom than myself....we talk about "my time", she said, "Don't talk to me about it Kelly, they'll have to bury me with you...." now as a mother, God my heart just shatters when I think of my mom and my kid 💔
I was pregnant with my son when I hear this song for the first time, I broke down and cry just thinking the pain is to see your child struggling and going through hell. I hope my son never finds drug, ever, but I will be there for him, regardless of anything. I love this band, every song is so intense and soulful. Just very much what so many go through.
+Larissa M.A.Boyd prepare you child to make correct choices. Don't shelter them and keep them ignorant of what's out there. They need to know what will benefit them and what will make their life difficult.
As a Bipolar schizoaffective type named Justin this song is so hard to listen to for me, it speaks to me in ways no other song ever has, thank you for creating this.
addiction cost me 20 years in the pen. a string of robberies..my daughter was an infant when I fell and a young woman upon my release. been 7 years back in her life..27 years clean !
Ive been sober now for 3 whole months its one accomplishment that you helped me with..The one thing that tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again...these lyrics hit my soul hard. It's how I lost the love of my life. I hate meth from the depths of my heart. I love you Tamra
we all care about you man! Sorry for your loss. If you need some guys to chat with look up den of tools on youtube and join us Saturday nights in live streams.
Never has been drugs for me just depression and suicidal thoughts. Anxiety. I often feel this world isn't for me. I feel I wont be able to be a good father, friend, spouse. Never can turn it off. If anyone is dealing with the same I hope you have more strength than I do.
You have the strength you get up and the power to say to yourself I can do this. The power to believe in yourself. And keep trying your best. Many BLESSINGS to you. @James self
Took me a decade since hearing this song to really understand what was happening to me. My life sucked. A LOT. Parent's kicked me out, ended up flunking out of school and homeless at 18. Probably played this song a couple thousand times to help me get through it all. I'm 25 now and I just got accepted into a university to make my dreams of having a big Adult job come true. For the younger ones still finding this music, it's gonna get better. It's gonna suck a lot, but it will get better. We make mistakes daily, but keep your head up. You got this. Thank you Justin and band for making such great music to help all of us get through these tough times in life.
@jamesonmeckes5796 same,& no one understands it.they think it's oh we want to get high..no, I don't want withdrawal s doctors never told the teen version of me, withdrawals, in fact I never heard that word Decade ago
Ummm, mine did. Sent $50 grand by way of their atty, with a cashiers check & my signature that I would NEVER even attempt to reach the family again... I was in ICU at the time. So, I believed that shit about mothers & family too. It's clearly not a blanket thing. My niece was the lucky one. She was cursed too, we were close but to have tenderness & mercy in ur soul was NOT an asset but curse in our genetics. her addiction was starving herself to death w/ a silver spoon in her mouth at 19, striving for perfection, anything less not acceptable, me? The tea service silver spoons were in my bag & I chose altered states of mind & so it goes...is mother still alive? No clue
Just a quick scroll through comments and I give many kudos to all who have overcome addiction, it's a daily battle, and every single one of you are magnificent for fighting and winning that battle every day. For those still fighting that daily battle, please know (if you don't already) that you're hurting the ones you love just as much as you are yourselves. I have lost the person I cared most about in the world due to their lack of ability to see their addiction as an issue, and it still cuts me to the core every day. I hope anybody who is still in the throes of addiction and reading this can acknowledge their issue and find help with it. Bless.
God bless u Nico and thank you for that post. Instead of bashing you were as positive as you could be while probably crying it's a very heart felt song anyway thank u for not being mean and hateful
Thank you man. I am an addict and finally starting to see the trouble I cause the ones I love. Your comment is very real and very appreciated and one of the few TH-cam comments that has touched me. So, thank you.
C. Creature sometimes it seems it doesn’t matter how much u love ur loved ones that drug can be bigger than all of that shit. I have a 15 yr. old and I’d literally die for her today right this very second I am in recovery but my love for her doesn’t keep the bottom from falling out sometimes like u said it’s an everyday battle today I’m winning tom. Who knows
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The first line hits deep. "I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head"
I've been listening to this song since I was a teenager and it still resonates as I'm almost 30.
Great music never lets those original feelings go away ❤️
well i’m a gen z who plans on carrying this music on..
It hits hard im 45
This hits hard
🥺
This was one of my Dads favourite songs. He passed away on September 10th, 2024. Love you Dad, forever.
I’m sorry man, don’t stop and don’t stop making him proud !!
I'm sorry for your loss. My dad also loved this song because he said it reminded him of the relationship we had when I was using. Been clean 10.5 years now.
So very sorry for your loss . I lost my dad too may 10th 2023 .
Lost my pops to ALS in February. Not saying it gets easier but you find ways to cope over time. Good to see you're still fighting. Dad would be proud bud❤️
My dad was my role model, man among men. I am sorry for your loss but know he left you with his legacy!
I’m 8 years sober this year. I can’t hear this song without crying. It reminds me of me and my mother when I was using and all the pain I put her through. I never thought I’d be able to get sober at the time, even when I wanted to. I love my mom so much and she’s been so supportive all throughout my recovery.
This song is beautiful and a reminder of where I never want to be again.
So good to hear you've got so much time sober, thats awesome man
You got this! Stay strong.
learning is how we grow. not learning keeps us in our own mind making us a prisoner in our own mind. You broke free. Good job!
Ты хороший человек мой друг
I'm sure she loved you the most upon her exit, if she's no longer around. I put my mother through the same but I'm sure on an elevated measure. She not only forgave me, but nor would she leave this Earth without my voice being the last voice she heard upon leaving. That my friend is what unconditional love is all about. Don't be hard on yourself. Your mother's love is what forever is all about. Sending blessings your way. Stay strong.
May this year be the one my son finds sobriety. We miss him.
My cousin finally did after almost 20 years .... prayers for your kiddo to get clean
This is one of the best songs ever!
He can 🎉
I wish this for your son and mine. I love you.
I miss myself
I was a homeless fentanyl addict for 6 years, and this song was always on my playlist because he said, "I'm sober now for 3 whole months..." and I looked forward to finally saying that. I just celebrated 2 years clean, and my life is amazing now.
Congratulations on your sobriety 🎉 keep going , you got this 🙌
@@caseymp25 Thank you very much!
I keep trying💚
@@susanmoriarty7533 As long as you don't give up. I wish you all the best.
You made it, king. 🫶🏻
What kills me is that almost 13 years later this song still pulls on my heart. To all those still struggling the long battle of depression, you're not alone. The fog will lift.
I hope it lifts soon
When😭😭😭💔💔💔
Everyone everyone in this World God knows we all fight hard times and can get tough, but look to Jesus
😕😔😭
@@joshriley1955 It might not lift, but maybe you can learn to live with it. Don't search for eternal happiness but a point where you can say ok, I can live with this.
My husband passed away 3 days ago & this was one of his favorite songs. This will be on repeat for awhile probably.
I love you Mike ❤️
❤❤💔
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Please remember that life is worth living for all of us
I'm so sorry, it's so hard! My husband of 30 years died on November 1st.... I'm not sure how to function without him 💔 take care of yourself the best you can.....🤗
@@georgiaross6741 I'm so sorry. Iwas with my husband for 30 years too. He passed January 2020. I wish I could tell you it gets easier, but it really doesn't. You do learn to cope though. He was my whole world.
Sorry for your loss, Rest in Peace Mike
My name is Nat. I'm a 40 year old female who is also a recovering opiate addict. I'm posting here to let anyone who needs to hear this know, there is always hope! I spent all of my 20s and most of my 30s chasing a high. June 10th, 2024 was 6 years and 5 months clean for me! Whatever demons you're battling, please know you're not alone. Each of us has a demon or demons we're fighting every single day. Wherever you are, whoever you are, just know this random woman right here is sending you love, positivity, and hope for better days ahead. My life today is a testament to that!
Hi Nat. Sorry. I was homeless too. In San Diego.
With love .
Nat, that is so awesome ❤ I love this song and I love the part where he says he has been sober for 3 whole months 💙 because I want to be able to say that. I am a meth addict and this drug and demon is trying to take everything I have but starting today I am Goin give it one hell of a try to stop. Like run to be clean as much as I ran to chase that high. I need me a sponsor. I am thankful that I will be on your mind. Your comment meant so much to me. I had always listened to country but when I started getting high my music range changed and that's how I found this song.
❤ hope is all we have
8/30 I’ll have 2 years clean after 27 years of opiate addiction. It’s almost unbelievable. Blessings to you. We do recover!
This is without a doubt one of the most emotionally powerful, raw songs of all time. It captures guilt, addiction, mental health, and love.
My son committed suicide he was only 23!
@@cindyn8994I'm so sorry! Please hang in there! I battle depression and addiction myself and it is hard to stay in front of it!
@@amandamcgraw2586 Hang in there you matter in this world you can help others please help me to help other people so there families don't go through this it's not easy losing my baby!
My momma didn't stay strong tomorrow she's been gone 17 fucking worst years of my life.
@@amandac3301 sorry
Lost my mom to addiction almost 2 years ago. This song hits harder now than ever. I am now becoming an addiction counselor in May after receiving my degree. I hope wherever she is she knows I love her and did this for her. ❤
❤
She knows 😇
my condolences to you your mother knows the love you have for her whenever you feel alone talk to her it helps and congrats on the new career we need more like you
♥️🙏🏻
👉🏼👍💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼
*"While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight."* Thank you forever for that. 🖤
Anyone with an emotional regulation disorder knows that line on a painfully personal level.
Those words are so powerful, I relate to them very often, to you , stay strong, and another awesome song ...... I hope your happy ...
Tauney Elysia
The line that makes me break down is, “You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take.”
No matter how many times I listen to this song, I sob. If you’ve ever struggled with an addiction or love an addict, this song hit you right there in the most tender part of your soul.
One of the best lines
if you have emotion issues this song is the right one for you
I'm so proud of everyone in the comments. Staying another day ❤ keep fighting we're all in this together, you're not alone
Man, I'm 41, to this day this song makes me cry. Stay strong people. You're loved. ❤
I'm fucked fuck depression 28 and about to lose my mind
Same fella
Same. Mental illness is such a weight to bare, but I'm still here thanks to songs like this
43 and right here with ya.
Me too bro
Dear younger me. We made it. It got better. We did it. We're happy. We're loved
Bless you. I feel this personally
Beautiful
Kill
💜
❤️❤️
I can finally understand why my husband listened to this song the last few months of his life. He didnt suffer from addiction rather a brain tumor. I whole heartedly believe he knew he was going to die soon. And I think in his way of dealing with his own mortality became the realization that I would be left to pick up the pieces for our kids and I and I think he thought if I was mad at him it would make it easier for me to move forward. Its been almost 3 months and it hasn't gotten easier at all. Im drowning. But this song weirdly brings me peace and some understanding of his mindset and clarity on some of our last conversations.
I am a 3x brain cancer patient. I listen to this very often... I’m very sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your loss.. hope you can get some healing from this song.. thoughts are with you and your family.. stay strong.
@@samied5527 I can relate. I think people who listen to billy eillish probably have a brain tumor. I think that should be a question asked in medical facilities. Do you find yourself listening to billy eilish and even enjoying the music - if yes = possible a brain tumor case. She could go down in history for being the best way to detect a brain tumor.
what a profound observation. thank you for sharing this. sorry for your loss
God bless some how you seem to know... not that that makes it better
If you're reading this and crying as I am, just hold on. Please, just hold on one more day. You are loved. You have so much love and life to give, just give it one more day.
❤
We're here bro
❤❤❤
@@ItsKadelyn
Damn seeing all these comments of people being clean just makes me happy for you all! Keep up the good fight no matter how hard it gets! Love to you all!
Miguel Garza ✊🏼 Right On
10 years now
YES! Addiction isn't easy on anyone! So proud of ppl who are staying clean and working on themselves!! Keep up the wonderful and yet hard work of staying sober!!
Sober since 10/27/2017 life is great.. Wish you all the best.
People lie A LOT.
Believe it or not, today is the first time I heard this song. It was among a platlist I was listning to. I've listen to it 4 times so far and it has really hit me. By the grace of God I have been clean for 33 years and the emotions are still there of the fear and pain I put my mom through. My mom has been gone for 22 years now and I miss her everyday. She not only gave me life but helped save it. Although she died from cancer I can never get the thought out of my head that I might of shaved a few years off her life. I am grateful that she saw me clean, get married and I was able to give her a grandson that she could enjoy for a few years. She is always in my heart and I hope to be with her again when its time. To anyone struggling out there, don't give up and fight everyday. It's a wonderful life!
😢
I’m proud of you and I know your mom is proud of you too man, I don’t know you but I love you and I wish you a long happy life with your wife and kids. You got this!
@@kittykat7654thank you so much! Love you too!
Welcome to the fanbase for the most underrated band in history! Happy to have you!
Keep on fighting everyone I battle silent wars with myself every day I never thought I could be good enough to have somebody now I have a step daughter and looking into her eyes makes my want to keep pushing on everyday. There is light at the end of every dark tunnel sometimes we have to fight hard to see it I feel for everyone who has depression
I never knew that was really his Mom crying over him. When I saw that interview it hit the feels hard. I lost my 23 year old son, Joshua, last year to suicide. I would never want any mother or father to know this pain. I’m so glad Justin has made it through the drugs and depression. As someone that deals with suicidal self-hate myself, I know the battle with depression is never totally over. But I’m so glad Justin has gotten to such a good place with all his internal demons. His Foiled, AMIA album plus the song Fear got me through my divorce 6 years ago. I’ve since found the love of my life, but now I’m dealing with the daily heart-swallowing pain of the loss of my son. I live each day for my other children and hubby. That’s all. Peace to you all.
I wish I could take your pain away. Peace to you
Im so sorry for your loss. My brother also chose to end his life so I keep on keeping on knowing I'm my parents last remaining child and they need me to stay here. Sending love to you and yours.
My brother lost his only son to suicide last year. His name was also Joshua and I wish we could have saved him too.
My wife lost her mom two years ago and she doesn't want me to play this song but I have convinced her that her mom is at peace so thanks Justin
Wherever you are, whoever you are, I believe in You, I believe in You.
Co Dy ...back at ya...
Love, respect n blessings. Thanks! 😭🤗💚✊
Im right here
😢😢😢😢😢😢 ❤ so ssoooo sweet ❤😊🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
My husband and I have been in recovery since April 2, 2008. This song helped me through a lot of darkness and guilt, and many of Blue October's other songs helped me in the intervening years. We've seen him in concert with the rest of the band 5 times, and have met Justin several times. We finally got the chance to get VIP tickets to his Open Book Tour, which allowed us a few minutes to speak with him, personally, and tell him how much he'd helped on our own road to recovery. Shaking his hand and thanking him to his face was an amazing experience, and like the truly good person he is, he was gracious and amazingly receptive. He must hear it a dozen times a day, but in that moment, we felt like he heard us and was proud to have played a role in our sobriety. His humility is awesome to witness, and even after all of this time, we remain huge fans, and we're now 14 years sober.
Congrats on both you and your husband's sobriety!
He'll yeah! Way to go! Love to you & your husband. Fight on!
that is really awesome..
Mel, that's amazing! You and your hubby rock and I love this for you both. I know the struggle myself, and it's no joke. The sheer strength it takes to remain sober comes from so deep . Keep fighting and working it. You're in my thoughts.
Noice. I see you. Keep going strong
This song has had so many meanings to me throughout the years. It never gets old, and I play it on repeat at times. I was pregnant with my son when I heard it for the first time. It was extremely rough to hear, but the two of us are here today together and thriving.
Depression and addiction not only hurts the sick and suffering. It took me 20 years to realize that
With you! Keep fighting and see the good even when it's hard and it hurts. Do the best that you can. You are here for a reson even if it hasn't shown itself yet.
This make me happy
My momma played this song constantly while i was growing up...she was so loving and did the best she could for me but she battled with addiction....she was found dead in a creek in mississippi and i find myself taking everything to feel nothing because it hurts so bad...please pray for me and my family.
best of luck I hope things get better it hurt to lose people to drugs and it makes you want to do drugs, I get high a lot but at least I'm not doing pills. Just strive for better and try to get help. My brother was the same we were both based and he found drugs to cope with it after it got really bad for him where he almost died I said fuck it a joined him. I've been sober off morphine and opioids for a year now and pills for 4 months. You can do it you just gotta believe!
@@eijirokirishima1097 dang bro thanks...thats amazing though man im proud of you, keep it up!
Holy fuck bruh, im so sorry for your loss and pain, i cant imagine! Please dont leave this world, it gets better... i promise!
Prayers and love. Please comment on how you are doing. I really do care.
My mother is an addict, and I have a no contact order, I know some day I'm gonna get the call that shes gone. Its hurts. She wasnt always a bad mom, but she just cant get clean and isnt safe around my kids. I hope you find peace, in whatever way you can, and I hope you know that there is NOTHING you could have done. Its ugly, addiction, and it destroys families, but none of it was ever your fault
This has to be one of the most underrated unappreciated songs ever written. When there is honesty and emotion there is absolutely electric vibes that make a song an unforgettable hit. This song has so much meaning to me, lost friends of overdose, suicide, depression. It's never easy to explain or express those feelings and or thoughts. Please don't forget how important each of you are, and if you need support please talk to someone. I know first hand that, when my step mom committed suicide she was in so much emotional pain and thought it would leave with her. Believe me, it didn't, it amplified and spread to all 5 of us kids, and several grand children. We miss her deeply. I've never talked about anything this this before online. But today I felt like in October 2021 we could all use love and support. I just want to spread positive thoughts and vibes to everyone in the comments. I have a saying, it's Make your own luck. I believe in that. Have a blessed day 🙏❤️
I wish you peace.
❤️
Sending positive vibes, light and love right back to you❤️
Thank you and you have a great day and know it’s ok
I love this. My quote to guide me through is "Don't ever let your light burn out. There is so much darkness in the world that can blow you away; but the more light that shines, the more good that becomes. Shine bright and be strong. There are others that need that light."
Day 4 clean from heroin. Taking it 1 second at a time. This song is really helping. God plz give me strength.
2 years clean. It's hard but so worth it. Keep it up my friend!!!
@@chucknorris3rdnut thanks that means a LOT. :) I,hope it gets easier
It does, but the thought will never leave. Just please be strong!! That shit kills too many good people and you do not need to be one of them.😊
I'm on day 4 today !
@@TheDoubla44 that's Awesome !!! How are u feeling ? Almost a week!!!
My little brother always said this was our song. Growing up in broken homes full off alcohol and every kind of drug. I went down the dark road to escape the sexual abuse and physical abuse. Being the problem since we were born. I think of him every time I hear this. I got clean and sober in 2014. Broke sobriety in March 2024 after having my daughter stillborn.
i hope you're doing well. take it one day at a time and dont be afraid to reach out to the ones you love. they're thinking of you.
One day at a time…you are a warrior with every breath you choose to take ❤️🖤❤️🩹
This was my dads favorite song, he struggled my whole life with drugs and depression, I'm 30 now. We lost him 5 years ago. Every time I come back to this song I feel him with me.
I'm sorry for your loss I lost my mom in 2015 to alcohol addiction and my baby sister who was 24 to her sh*t being laced because she wanted to leave the man she was with for her husband and get clean in 2018
Sorry to hear that..sorry for your loss.. I struggled with heroin for years. I did ten dollars worth that ended up being fentanyl and almost died and was revived with narcan. As sick as it sound it saved me and I found God. Drugs are the devil on earth.
Sounds*
Hope you are doing ok
I hope that you know that while your dad, may he rest in paradise, fought his demons, that he loved you more than you’ll ever know.
(God put this on my heart to tell you)
All these years later, and I still cant listen to this song without getting emotional.
honestly. reminds me of when I overdosed and my mom catching me. this song holds so much to me.
Powerful. Just like life. Wishing you the best mate.
Same.... like ugly cry....
Same
Wow I would have never expected these type of comments on my mom's friends video 😁 it's ok you will get through this
I am 7 years clean and sober this year. This song got me through so many of my dark days. If you're struggling, I BELIEVE IN YOU. I promise life gets so much better 😭
I'm proud of you
If no one told you today, I am proud of you
Thank you❣
If it got you threw keep playing and fighting love girl
So glad for you. Keep strong
37, bpd. Heard this song in my teens... Still come back to this when I get this low.. Appreciative that something musically understands my pain. Love to all reading this.
Same friend. When it hurts and someone else can express what you can’t seem to vocalize. 💔
“while I was busy waging wars on myself you were trying to stop the fight”
That lyric is so powerful
Indeed
Yes!
I love this song it's so beautiful I love how Justin expresses himself so dark as he is feeling...reminds me of my life and meds betrayal and pain and then my last true love in a shirt time I loved him so fast and he left my side I don't c anyone now in my path it's like I have scales on my eyes...I love how he walks to the cemetery and has his glasses on and head held high... I love you blue October beautiful song so deep so amazing I relate to each scene and all the pain....beatriz
I need a chance to get my life together and give me a second longer
@@christywillz4347 I've been in that situation and good luck to ya!👍
I am the mother. This song is therapy for me, I sing it as loud as I can when things are rough and are getting to me mentally. It helps me know I am not alone. It also gives me hope to see where Justin is now.
He's in such a beautiful place in his life. He gives all of the credit to gaining his sobriety and he fights like hell to hold on to it ❤️
This song has meant a lot to me. Glad it helps you too 😉
I love this song, it makes me cry every time I hear it. It has all the human elements that hit us straight in the heart. God bless you, and of course Justin
What is this song about though? I'm confused who's the bad person here? The son or mom?
@@janielopez6868 if you don't understand than it ain't for you babes
It's the type of song that you either relate with and understand or that cha don't
Most of us in the world feel as if the song was written just for and about us
Cause certain music/songs you "hear" with your *ears* and than there's such as like this one that you just "feel" with your *soul* and entire being
Bro I heard this song when I was young, before I ever had thoughts of pain or anguish or suicide or suffering. Hearing it again at 30 after drug addiction,divorce, and 3 suicide attempts then finally freeing myself from drugs and trying to piece it back together and it being to late to save my relationship with alot of people including my wife. Just has me sitting in my job like tearing up. I'm sober and healthy today but shit what a life we survived huh...
Listen to fear..his acoustic is way better
You are a survivor and a figther and in case you do not hear it as often as you should, I am proud of you
F.E.A.R = Fuck Everything And Run OR Face Everything And Recover. Even on our absolute worst days, it’s a choice. So you choose… I choose life.
Sometimes (usually around 3 in the morning- something about 3 am)I can't decide if what I have left was worth the war I waged to "survive". Most of the time I know that survival is ultimately worth any cost but I just lost so much over the years. No, "lost" isn't the right word; "wasted" is the more honest word choice. By choosing years of intense alcoholism and drug use, I wasted so many chances and opportunities in life. Don't get me wrong, I was somehow more functional than many people are.. I raised both of my kids while working 50+ hour weeks, never losing custody of then to social services. I worked as hard as I played. But I was also moody and irritable, often bad tempered and demanding. I chose to live 1200 miles from any immediate family in order to more easily hide my addictions and habits. The cost? I barely know my family anymore and they hardly know me. I didn't really feel the pain of separation or loneliness until my kids were grown and moved out. And they unfortunately learned their idea of "normal" from me; I rarely ever hear from them though I love them more than life itself and would give anything to be invited into their worlds. They're happy enough to hear from me when I'm able to catch them with a few spare minutes to talk; there was never a falling out or hard feelings between us. They just watched me create and maintain a certain distance from my family for so long that it seems normal to them for us to only see one another a few times a year and to talk on the phone when they "think about it." I'm simply not necessary to their existence or happiness. I'm very proud of them both but would give anything to be actually WANTED or NEEDED- to be an important part of their lives. But I'm eternally grateful that they turned out so well. It had to be God's Hand on them because I certainly didn't make great choices. I'm two years clean now and struggle daily to find a reason to remain so. So far I'm winning but don't know if this soul-deep sadness is sustainable in the long run substance free. For now though I keep trudging through the mire, always hoping to one day wake up and find happiness again. I wish joy, strength, and purposeful living to everyone out there; thank you so much for reading all this... Peace ☮️ and Love 💗 Always!!
Man. I feel this comment bro. I’m 35. I was a freshman in high school I think when this song came out and I could only attribute it to breaking up. I’ve heard this a million times but it was just still playing in the airwaves at the time. Well it’s been like 10 yes since I heard it. And lemme just say everything you said…yep. I felt that like 1000%
14 years and this song still hits so hard
AGREED.💯‼
Yes . I agree
still can't listen to this 10 years later without crying. It's the most soul-touching song i've ever heard and i've yet to find another that hurts me the same way.
I love you, sorry for all the things I didn't do, for you.
This song is so full of feelings, so full of meaning. Even the singer is so touched by it that he hurt his finger playing it during the video making. That was not staged, it actually happened. This song is what I sing silently to many members of my family and acquaintances/partners that I failed to along my life.
Summer Fender Did they include the part where he hurt his finger while recording the video? If yes, would you mind telling me at what time it happens? I watched again but didn't see it. Either way, I agree that you can literally feel the emotions from him coming at you right through the screen. Almost feels like he's staring right at me while singing and that the song was written for me.... It's so weird I know, but I can't think of another song that has had such a crazy affect on me.
+Christina Sanders Check from 3:17 to 3:45. You can see his middle finger all bloody from the cords friction. And we feel the same way about the song, that probably means we have deep, good feelings haha.
Thanks for your reply I will definetly check it out.
I see it now. I don't know how I missed that especially since I've watched this video probably more than a hundred times. Thank you.
I have had such a hard time lately physically, mentally, and emotionally. I am so exhausted. It’s 1:30 am and i’m crying to this song after seeking it out for the first time in forever. Over a decade later and it still hits so hard 🖤 for everyone else out there struggling: you are loved, you matter, and you are stronger than you think you are. We will get through this.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
❤
@@stevenwheat3621 it is not silly. Your emotions and feelings are valid
You're goddamned right we will. Stay strong. 🖤
I sure hope you're right about that.
My dad died of an od 24 years ago, I followed in his footsteps years later... I've od, 3 times.. my teenage son found me... the hate that a heroine addict feels towards themselves is crippling... 4 months clean now ... one breath at a time ... congrats to all of you that have found your way to back..
Jen Warner keep going
you got this
Jen Warner suboxon things get better there is no easy path it's hard work but the Suboxone makes it much easier
Hell. Yes you can make it
Thank you all... it really does get easier. NEVER did I think I would hear myself say those words... the depression has subsided a Lot.. not saying I don't still have difficult days... I am 7 days away from my 7 month :-) this song here is part of my music therapy... with every breath, every min, every hour and every day.... those of you fighting this fight, stay strong
I remember this song came about just as I entering my early twenties adulthood. A few years later in my late twenties, I started to begin to understand the meaning behind the song. Addiction, unconditional love, recovery. At first, I thought it was about my own struggles my mother supported me through. Now, in my mid-thirties, I realize that it's the other way around. But I imagine this what my mother might think of me now. I've struggled with alcoholism the past year and I'm sure I've put a lot of weight on her shoulders without knowing it. Remembering this song randomly tonight made me realize I have to do better by my mother. Thank you for this song, Blue October. From my young adulthood to becoming a middle-aged man, the lyrics and meaning behind your songs have given me the perspective I've needed throughout all these years.
My cousin hung himself in June 2013, and this song was one of his favorites.
He used to get me to play it every time we'd go out riding around.
This year makes it ten years since then.
Love ya, Matt.
I’m sorry man. Rest In Peace Matt❤🕊️
So sorry my condolences
My condolences 😢 💔 my son committed suicide in 2016 we had no idea how much he was hurting 😢😢 James, we love you ❤
It doesn't ever get much easier but you can help keep their memory alive by helping others!
May you be free from suffering my friend
I tried killing myself several times and it didn’t work. Crazy
Lost my son to an overdose. The only band we saw together was Blue October. This was our life.
❤
You are being held with so much love and healing.
❤️🙏🌹
I'm so sorry for your loss. ❤
I’m sorry for your loss ❤
RIP for all of those who did not surive the silent battle of depression and hang in there to those who are fighting it currently, words from a fellow warrior: it gets better ❤
Thank you
I sure hope and pray so....
When the weight of yesterday has a grip on you.. Know that your pain and suffering can be a motivator to find the best version of you.. Always know your life matters.. Despite the failure of our past..
💜
So so alone😥 Idk how to keep going when I literally have no one.
my mom lost her battle with mental health July 20th 2023, this song was the first real thing that made me process her passing and gave me my first, real, big cry over it. i had to be strong for my older sisters and for my moms loved ones and so i packed all my feelings away until i made her memorial video to play at her funeral, and this song was one of three i used .... and i broke. i always loved this song growing up, but now ... now i have a whole new love for this song!
You made your mom proud. People can judge all they want, but some of us know the battle with mental health. Keep fighting on, you are loved.
Same reason for my love of the song. Same scenario, different circumstances. Sending you love
Mental torture endure that from a quack and his pack
Organ tom petty what so g
It’s crazy that I have no one literally I just come to the comments for support I wanna be loved
This song is the perfect description of the devastating consequences of addiction, especially to loved ones trying to help. I always liked this song because of the message, the journey it takes the listener on and the visceral reation caused by it. Very raw and simply an outstanding piece of artwork.
This song is the reason I’m sober and alive today. Godbbless to this band. Both parents overdosed. I’m all I got and I’m single mom but this song helps me every day.
I'm sorry you had to experience such grief
So sorry for your tragic loss and well done to you.. you must be so strong... I have family but no kids and 3 years clean xx
Bless you for staying sober and alive. You are stronger than you know.
I'm sorry
Not only does God love you but I do
This was me and my mother’s relationship for so many years....nights she stayed by my side praying I wouldn’t stop breathing. I put her through hell and I’m just glad she never gave up on me. A mother’s love for her child is endless.....
I wish I had the words to bring you some more light back in your life.
I feel you. A mothers love. I put my family through hell. My wife stuck by me my son wouldn't talk to me for months. Good women in your life is a god send. Stay strong.
Heather M stay strong a mother’s love is a bond like nothing else! Wishing you the best!!
I can relate with you my friend. Be strong!
Unconditional sweet . A mom will always be there no matter how much pain she carries 💖
I had the privilege to Meet Justin and Jermey last night! Unbelievable experience. This man has kept me alive for 14 years. I struggle with Major Depression. Well last night I was able to tell him this. He looked up at me and said “You have the most beautiful eyes! 😢❤. I shook my savors hand, one of my hero’s. Thanks you to the entire band. Seen you all on Aug 2, 2024 in Clearwater, FL! The sound was amazing!
“Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you” always feels like a punch to the gut, because it was what I thought for so long.
Can relate. I feel this way a lot. Wish I could just leave this world, I don't want to burden others.
Stay up. Both of ya's
Also can relate. Everyone deserves better than me or what I can offer so I let them know.
True....
My wife messed around on me five times before I finally left her it was hard
one of the most painful things for me EVER was deleting old voicemail messages from my mother and deleting her phone number from my phone. always hurt when scrolling through and seeing her name... and wanting to call and talk to her one last time. here i am, almost 50 years old... lost her 12 years ago... and eyes watering and pain in my heart every time i listen to this song, watch this video, and read all your comments. one thing i try to explain to younger people... NEVER take for granted the love of your parents. appreciate everything they are and everything they do. enjoy your time with them and try to never have any regrets. it will eat you up inside later on ...when its too late.
Keep pushing through brother
Say your prayers
Eat your vitamins
And kick some ass
Im also in my 50's and so much regret deleting voice messages my mom would leave. especially the last one of her wishing me a happy birthday and telling me about the day i was born. I never thought she would pass away the next day. I miss her so much and her lovely voice. So many times when she was alive i would take the time we had for granted thinking we had many years to come and not doing or spending quality time with my mom. I miss you mom, im sorry.
now my son is doing the same as i did with my mom. I feel that one day he will also feel how im feeling now. im praying that it doesnt but its seems to be heading in that direction.
so sorry for your losses guys 🙏💖
My heart just broke That's why I saved messages My God God bless you I'm thinking of you what a weird time to read this message
Anyone listening to this in 2024? Sometimes I come back to listen to this song and it still gets me emotional.
Me tooo 😪
We are always here
I'll listen to it the rest of my life
hits me everytime,
Right in the feels
Not in recovery myself, but I started dating a girl last July who was in recovery(alcohol). She relapsed in May and did a 30 day rehab. I visited and tried to support her however I could. She got out on Memorial Day. The next day she went on a drinking binge and never came home that night. Her sponsor found her and took her back to rehab. She's doing another 30 day stint and may move back to sober living when she gets out. She told me this past weekend that she still loves me, but she can't be in a relationship right now. It's killing me because all I want to do is be there for her. I have to let her do what she thinks is best for her health. I'm dying inside, tho. Just wanted somebody to hear it. Much love, y'all!❤
I heard you. Sending love and hope your way
If you care for her…..give her space. She will come back if she get clean . Do not enable her
Support 💙
All I can say is this song touches my heart and soul. I lost my only child, my son Danny to a drug overdose. I found him 10 hrs too late, Please don't stop fighting, please don't leave your mom, it hurts like hell.
You fought the good fight, sweetheart...
I will always be your proud mom.
#forevermissed
#forever23
I am so sorry
I know how this feels, I desperately miss my little sister because of this stupid deadly drug too. I'm so darn sorry you feel this too because it's hard.
I'm so sorry you feel that pain
:(
so sorry my son also put a gun to his hea over his wife stpd lovn him then5mo later my nef nits all crazy i feel ya so sorry its like they hated it here
The older I get the harder this song hits. Like many on this thread I suffered from addiction, heroin addiction specifically. Time and time again my loved ones found me passed out, OD'd, wondering if this would finally be the end. I'm still wracked by the guilt of forcing them to watch the self destruction. The friend I used with, we relapsed, and he didn't make it out alive. I'm sober now, but sometimes I can't help but think he had to pay the price for that. There is no song that really encapsulates the feelings I felt then this one.
Man that part where his finger is bleeding from hitting his strings so hard... that’s raw emotion.. This is more than just a song for him you can tell.
Timestamp?
@@genesis6199 At about 3:39 you can see his middle finger has dried blood on it
i agree i have scar tissue over my index finger from doing this so many times while playing music
You nailed it. My exact thoughts the first time I seen the video.
His facial expressions show it as well.
I’m 32 and can’t get over my first gf, I had a hard life and she was the only one I believed truly loved me, confused by my life I let her go. Every time I hear this song it reminds me of the best moment of my life that I ruined… she used to love this band ❤ juju
My mother is going through dementia and most things she remembers in our conversations are negative things that I went through with her growing up. But I know she loves me and is proud of me from the experiences and discussions we had as an adult. This song plays on repeat in my mind when she says something that I did when I was rebellious. Despite the put down I always cherish her and love and respect her even though in my younger days I resented her because I was a son of divorce, and lost my father at a young age.
I have to block out thoughts of you
So I don't lose my head
They're crawling like a cockroach
Leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape
To remind me that I'm alone
Playing movies in my head
That make a p#rn% feel like home
There's a burning in my pride,
A nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you.
Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me
Just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
I'm sober now for 3 whole months
It's one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart
Is the one thing I won't touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you
For holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself,
You were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions
On things like s**c*de or hate
You made me compliment myself
When it was way too hard to take
So I'll drive so f*ck*ng far away
That I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart
To leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things
I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah, ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street
For every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes crying
And I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling
"Make it go away!"
Just make a smile come back
And shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered
"How can you do this to me?"
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things
I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah, ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see
What's good for you, for you, for you, for you.
Thank you
Why censor the art?
@@bobbfett6123 yes. Even suicide?
If you’re listening to this just know everyone here understands whatever pain you’re going thru
thank you man
Thank you.
Thank you. For 17 years i been fighting depression. Im 21 now. I put the blade down 6 times my whole life after 37 breakups through out my life.
thank you.
>> everyone here understands whatever pain you’re going thru
No, they don't. You had to be there to get the joke.
-Clean & sober twenty years this coming October
This song still kills me to this day. I was just newly sober when it came out and I listened to it all the time. Around that time my marriage had recently ended and my addiction played a role in it falling apart. This song really mirrored my life at the time. I’ve been sober ever since and I thank God everyday for the strength to stay clean.
I remember being in FL as well when this song came out. It sure spoke to me then, but I wasn't sure why. I was very young. I wasn't ready to get sober, but a decade later I realize why this song was so profound at the time. I'd drive "so fucking far away" and play this song on repeat if I had the means.
I THANK GOD ALSO FOR YOU.
@@AprilKratzer Thank you 🙏🏼 That’s so incredibly kind of you to say. God Bless you! ❤️
Best wishes to you. Peace ✌
There are still good people out here. You're helping us as much as we are you. You're worth it :) god bless.
If anyone sees this. I quit coke 3 years ago from fear that I'd leave my mother alone on this world. This song hits.
My best friends brother sent this song to his mom days before he lost his battle to addiction. He expressed how he related to this song because at times he wanted his family to hate him so they wouldn’t worry about him anymore. This song was mentioned at his funeral. Every time I hear this song I see him and his struggle and his family. Please if you’re struggling please don’t give up that fight. Do it for yourself. Do it for the people who will loose their lives mourning your death. You are loved. Life is hard but you just have to keep fighting no matter what. Don’t give up please I’m begging you, it’s not worth it.
** RUSH ** ~ seriously Dude, you’re a fucking hero for raising the boys.
My son's name was cody I woke up and found him dead on my bedroom floor from a heroin overdose mixed with fentanyl home from rehab 34 days just one more time Mom I wish I would've broken his knee to keep him from leaving this will haunt me forever just one more time
Unless you're a terrible person, in which case, we're better off without you.
Oh God I'm trying so fucking hard! If I don't get over my husband's past infidelity from back in April I'll be gone I've had enough with childhood trauma, being the family disappointment, being alone all my life with no one to hear my cries. Forgiveness is one thing but remembering and trying not to compare myself to the other woman is another thing. I fight demons in my head every single day my head is like a prison.
@@samrumbo9321 feel ya. Keep ur head up!
I was suicidal for 5 years. i've been going through depression for 10 years and i was diagnosed with anxiety at 16. I hated myself for so long and just wanted to end everything.. But i got help and my mom and dad were my biggest supporters.
Now, I'm 19 years old and still chugging along and living my life the best that i can. I am also 3 years clean from self harming and i can say, I am beyond proud of myself 💜
look into magnesium supplements and vitamin c and vitamin b-3 niacin for anxiety stay strong
@@waynerowlands1298 thank you
You should be proud, you are special,unique,fantastic, you are worth alot and the good life God gives you,you deserved it enjoy it .
I'm proud of you too, Jamie! That's honestly great and I even teared up a bit for you! Congrats!
And so you should be , much respect to you parent , much love to all of you !
My son died January 10, 2022, from complications of drug addiction. Not an overdose, but an infection. There are times when I feel so guilty over things, but this song helps me so much. It reminds me of why things were the way they were. It reminds me of how hard I tried to be there for him, and it reminds me that he knew I loved him very much. 💙
I’m sorry I hope you are doing better now i know losing someone close is hard to get through
I promise he didn't mean to cause you any pain.
@@Jim-ri2if Thank you! ❤️
@@ryanberry9577 I know, and thank you! ❤️
💙💙💙💙💙♥️💙💙💙💙
I had a friend. He was so great. I was sad one night & he was too. He sent me this song. He passed away. Now this song hits me like concrete. I miss you Reigh.
"You never doubted my warped opinions
On things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself
When it was way too hard to take"
Ouch. I still can't listen to this without crying. I saw Blue October live many years ago and sobbed like a baby... the lyrics hit home then, and they still do today 💔
Why?
That's the most impactful two sentences of probably any song when I am in the mindset.
And the line before it.
❤
"i'm sober now for 3 whole months that one accomplishment that you helped me with...
the one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing i won't touch again" 2016 i put the needle in my arm for the last time got on a plane and it was finally over
Fighting alcoholism and depression. This song fits perfectly.
If you don't drink for a solid year, you can be it over time. Real talk......IF you relapse after the year sober of alcohol, chances are it will make you sick to drink by year 2 you should be "recover ed". Stop drinking for 1 year, try it. Safely though. I don't know your alcohol intake though as of now.
You stop drinking, it does help over come depression, you face life "more clearly". I stopped drinking, you can too.
Keep going man! Depression fucking sucks.
I have a puppy named Serj (like surge) and your name made me smile. Thanks dude and keep your head up you're stronger than any weak thought
Good luck!! Im still trying man
At first when i saw the comments, i thought 'wow there's a lot of darkness'. Then i saw it through a wider lens and realized it was all light. I'm so glad we're all still here ❤
-Amen
💙💙💙💙
sending you lots of love and thank you for the comforting comment. I'm glad too ❤
When you read the first couple of lines in a lot of comments it is a bit dark, but you read on and see that there's light, this song is dark in subject matter but it says that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
This song hits home so hard. My mom never left me alone in my darkest times of depression, anxiety and panic attacks.
That's what moms do. Good luck and smooth waters for your journey.
👍🏻
👍 i oh my life to my mum your comment hit home
Moms are such wonderful people
Thanks God for the moms that never let up or let us get too far out in the deep end.......most people think that's annoying blows em up always askin how they are or if they need to talk.....cuz i promise ya once that phone never rings anymore cuz that persons fight in life is done you'll miss every min of the lil annoying things they did the most......society molds people into assuming or associating annoying habits with a insecure or needy person when that couldn't be further from the case......people that call or try to see how you are even when we're being difficult human beings that my friends is that true unconditional love that so many people are so busy tryin to find that they dont notice it right in front of their face until its gone
Y'all struggling with your demons, you got this. I believe in you.
HideousAngel
Everyone has something.
We’re all in this together.
Be kind. Stay strong.
Take a deep breath. Take a moment.
Take a nap (who doesn’t love naps)
Tomorrow will look better.
I promise you this.
No end to it so just leave it alone.
And there are so many of those rat faced bastards out there it makes me physically and mentally sick... be strong live as whatever god you keep,and be blessed. Just believe
Drug addicts are not like the rest of us. They're not human. They're humanoid mutants. They infest urban areas and prefer to reside in filthy and decayed or dilapidated conditions. They use public washrooms for consuming drugs instead of shitting or pissing. They should be exterminated and purged from the planet.
@@ethanmaccullouch2776 - not all do those things n remember everyone struggling is someone's mother/father/sister/brother/daughter/son/husband/wife; you HAVE NO IDEA the suffering that drove one over the edge until you've lived it n have NO ROOM TO JUDGE - everyone has a vice, some thrice, the hell of pain n suffering one's subjected to is merely a roll of the dice; WE'RE ALL ONE MISTAKE AWAY FROM A TOTALLY DIFFERENT LIFE❣🙏
this is one of those songs. that you can actually feel every time you hear it.
Kevin Compton yes!
Dani Moss 💮💘💃
Shane Barrentine 😄
yes it is
Honestly if you can't feel this song. Actually feel it! You are not a human being!
This song accurately describes my entire childhood. During my parents' divorce, I distanced myself emotionally from my mother because she was tearing the family apart. I was trying to make it easier for her to abandon us in a selfish way. It worked, and I've been unable to learn to love again. If you are divorcing, NEVER force your kids make the decision to forsake one of their families on your behalf. Both of my parents failed my brother and I. We ended up raising ourselves because of neglect, and we're scarred because of it. My father and mother were both narcissists, so I was raised as a burden to the family. My unit stopped me from taking my own life and God intervened for me. But my point is parents shape the foundation of their children's understanding of themselves. Mine forsook me and it lead me down a dark path, don't do the same.
Hearing his mom's phone message brings me to tears everytime... miss my mom so much! Thank you mom and dad for never placing judgement on me EVER! Thank you for loving me unconditionally!
I hope for comfort for your aching heart.
I love this guy he singing about some real shit awesomeness
For a lot of people this song speaks to their addiction, for me its my own habits and choices outside of drugs and alcohol. Everything about this song reminds me of by gone days of choices made that turned into mistakes.
This song legit makes me cry these days.
My dad loves this song... He just passed away.... Can't hear it without breaking right the fuck down. . Everyone needs a song like this
I'm sorry man I know it's hard lossing a family member you just have to keep going
I'm so sorry for your loss. Even though he's gone, his love for you is still unending.
Sorry for your loss
Im sorry for your loss. Im here the same reason
I am so so sorry for your loss...
I'm the only family any of you will ever need. Take that and love life for what it's worth
Met my soulmate not long ago, been sober since.. struggling.. wish me luck as she’s already saved my life.
You can do it! The time you have been sober is a big accomplishment even if it doesnt seem so big. Every day is an accomplishment! Do it for her (:
Don't give up on yourself!
I really wish you the best man and am glad she helped you but addiction is so hard to overcome no matter how much you love someone, it just sometimes isn't enough. So you have to be strong and do this for yourself and get yourself better before jumping into a relationship. Stay friends for now but until you have been sober for at least a year sometimes longer, you shouldn't do it for anyone but you bc if this relationship should go bad then if you were not okay being by yourself sober, you risk a higher chance of relapse. And if it is meant to be with her, she will be there to support you and understand that you have to do this for you and only you can keep you sober. There will be a roller coaster of emotions from anger to sadness to happy to frigging mad at the word and don't know why. And you have to be good for you before you can be good for her. Good luck and I will be pulling for you bud. You stay strong. Go to meetings get a.support system that know what you are dealing with and want to help you and not judge you.
Do it for yourself. Everything else will fall into place.
Love reading this!!
when I was younger I understood the song, but now that I'm older it makes even more sense now... it breaks my heart...
Dakota Warriorcatsluvr can you explain it then? I don't get it
things that aren't important and things you don't fully grasp when you are young , you will realize differently when you are older. you realize everything you took for granted were the things you made important ..and you end up with regrets and realize how differently you should have felt and done thing
Same here
Te recuerda algo Sapacuate n Utherverse slds , excelente grupo
Man the tears that fall when this song plays. I try to hate you dad, but I can't it hurts. I don't know where u are or if ur still alive, but I love you and hope ur sober.
same feelings and situation 😔
hes ok where ever he is just believe
@Leigh Allmon people are not destined to repeat their parents mistakes
If you’re somewhere out there passed out on the floor, Joey I’m not angry anymore - Concrete Blonde
I'm sorry babygirl
Dear younger me, I am so proud of you for not going through with it. We’re still here, we fought and stuck it out. & Thank God we did because we have a beautiful little girl and a wonderful husband and life is beautiful than ever. We’re breaking cycles. We’re ok.
I used to listen to this song all the time with my mom, on the way to school, on the way to the park, Just all the time. In 2015 she died from diabetes and kidney failure when i was 9, and for a while I couldnt bear to hear it. But now I'm 17 and last year I started getting back into it and this song is now the closest I get to feeling like she is back. It hurts sometimes but this song brings back some of the happiness I felt when I was a kid.
Sounds like you are finally processing the loss. I lost my Dad at 18. We didn't have a song, but it took me decades to accept that he was gone. Still makes me sad thinking about it, and it's been 30 years. I believe we'll see our loved ones again. I couldn't go on if I didn't have that belief.
Good job man that’s what you need to do you take music in you turn it around to be good for you it’s terrible when you turn it around the other way and it’s sad when you hear a song you think about somebody the song should celebrate that person and that’s a good song what if you can celebrate somebody’s life with that song you got it brother God bless you and sending you love and light Namaste
❤
oh my god love, so many here to hug you.
I was 8 when my grandmother died I know how you feel
Lots of love in here. Dont see that much anymore. To all of you staying sober, I'm proud of you. Love to see someone win!! To all battling depression, missing someone, feeling lost, I hope you can put your mind at ease and dont be scared to put on a good tune and cry it out!! it does wonders!!
Love and thanks. Even after 29 years clean, as well as having depression issues, words like these mean A LOT to me. To the point that after hear this song again the eyes get damp, but this time with happiness at the understanding and care.
19 years. I wish my mom would have made it, she died in 96 from liver failure
Veteran that use to struggle with ptsd this song really hit home. I use to drive a wedge from feeling anything. Christ really helped heal me. Don't give up hope. Jesus loves you and will heal you like he did me.
You’re not alone. S/F.
Thank you 🙏❤🙏
Both of my parents are veterans and suffered greatly from PTSD. Seeing another veteran heal from their wounds is heartwarming and I am happy for you.
This is a very dark and raw song. I like the musicianship, Justin's singing, the production. I can't imagine how it feels to those for whom the lyrics apply and have real meaning to their life experiences.
I miss this kind of honesty in music. It is extremely refreshing to listen to this again.
Steve Mark I have not. I have a hard time listening to new music without prejudice, so my music log is that big lol
i hate you
James Gatz Listen to Disturbs cover of The Sound of Silence on Conan
I feel like this song is for all of us mothers out there whose babies are struggling with addiction/depression. It's a struggle that can be lost or won at any single second of any single day. 💔
I am one.
Alcohol has been my water for the past 10 years.. daily.
I wake up every morning and work my full 40+ but when I get home, the bottle is there.
What hurts me is, I make an excuse of not visiting my loved ones just to have a brew.
Resolutions are hard. I've failed time and time again. But cut backs are much easier.
I've been sober now for 5 days.
Gunna definitely have a couple this weekend. Then, back to dry. Moderation counts! And I can spend more time with my Mom❤
This song stung me for over a decade too.. They're not around forever.
I was only a toddler when i last saw my biological father. He died of an overdose when i was five. I always hated myself and felt like i wasn't good enough, not even for my own father to stick around. I wished that maybe one day he would sober up and be a part of my life. but then he died of an overdose before we ever got the happily ever after i longed to have. I hated him my whole childhood for leaving and vowed i would never let myself love him. but now im 13 with depression and i understand how bad it hurts, and how he just wanted that moment of bliss he got from the drugs. he desperately needed a way to let himself smile and laugh and an escape from all the pain. Now that I am much older i cant help but love him and forgive him, and i hope he will be waiting for me at the gates of heaven where our happily ever after can really come true
( i was adopted by a guy who completely fell in love with my mother and gave me all the love in the world. he means so so very much to me. he will always be my dad. but everyone tells me i shouldnt want a relationship with my biological father because I have my dad and i understand where they are coming from. but i want both i know that sounds selfish but i love the man who stepped up to be my dad when I needed one most but at the same time I would have also loved to build a relationship with my biological father someday)
This song makes me think of my mother, God bless her, she married a good but broken man, who then gave her 2 good but broken sons who fell into addiction with their dad. Who needed their mom to keep them alive when their dad died too early from those drugs, who helps those 2 good but broken sons with their own kids, so they don't become broken. Mother's cannot be praised enough
I cry more for my mom than myself....we talk about "my time", she said, "Don't talk to me about it Kelly, they'll have to bury me with you...." now as a mother, God my heart just shatters when I think of my mom and my kid 💔
I was pregnant with my son when I hear this song for the first time, I broke down and cry just thinking the pain is to see your child struggling and going through hell. I hope my son never finds drug, ever, but I will be there for him, regardless of anything. I love this band, every song is so intense and soulful. Just very much what so many go through.
God bless you and your son.
Drugs are bad
+Larissa M.A.Boyd prepare you child to make correct choices. Don't shelter them and keep them ignorant of what's out there. They need to know what will benefit them and what will make their life difficult.
+Denis Henrique dos Santos what drugs fella?
you intake drugs all day!!!
Marhault ElsDragoon Whaaaaaa? I only smell turtle necks
As a Bipolar schizoaffective type named Justin this song is so hard to listen to for me, it speaks to me in ways no other song ever has, thank you for creating this.
addiction cost me 20 years in the pen. a string of robberies..my daughter was an infant when I fell and a young woman upon my release. been 7 years back in her life..27 years clean !
Who are you people wtf
Proud of you!!!!
Keep going you got this
wow im alost 4 ytrs thanx for your story mn
Good. I hope my monster dies soon.
1,331 days sober and it never feels easier. My daughter is my biggest inspiration to stay clean.
My son is mine....just keep moving forward.
You are so wonderful! keep it up!
Day #1
Good to read that ur sober. Read ur reply that u posted
thc is my inspiration.
Ive been sober now for 3 whole months its one accomplishment that you helped me with..The one thing that tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again...these lyrics hit my soul hard. It's how I lost the love of my life. I hate meth from the depths of my heart. I love you Tamra
we all care about you man! Sorry for your loss. If you need some guys to chat with look up den of tools on youtube and join us Saturday nights in live streams.
This song should be played in every rehab and mental facility across the United States
15 years later and this song still hitting me in the feels.
The emotion in his face and voice when he says “hate me” is enough to make me break down every time I hear it .
Damn right. All these years later and it still makes my weekly playlist.
I always cry hearing this song, I never used drogs, even cigarette, nothing at all...but I feel his pain and I can't handle, it's so sad 😓
This is all me you need not care. I danced time to pay the pie per. No matter what the price!!
Best song ever!!
Never has been drugs for me just depression and suicidal thoughts. Anxiety. I often feel this world isn't for me. I feel I wont be able to be a good father, friend, spouse. Never can turn it off. If anyone is dealing with the same I hope you have more strength than I do.
I often say I wasn't meant for this world ❤️ I understand completely. I deal with so much anxiety and depression. You aren't alone ❤️
You are stronger then you think you are. Don’t know if you’re religious but hope God guides you.
We are in this world
but not of this world
Christ said
Fear not for I have Overcome
the world
So be it
I feel your exact feelings
You have the strength you get up and the power to say to yourself I can do this. The power to believe in yourself. And keep trying your best. Many BLESSINGS to you. @James self
Took me a decade since hearing this song to really understand what was happening to me. My life sucked. A LOT. Parent's kicked me out, ended up flunking out of school and homeless at 18. Probably played this song a couple thousand times to help me get through it all. I'm 25 now and I just got accepted into a university to make my dreams of having a big Adult job come true. For the younger ones still finding this music, it's gonna get better. It's gonna suck a lot, but it will get better. We make mistakes daily, but keep your head up. You got this. Thank you Justin and band for making such great music to help all of us get through these tough times in life.
Keep kicking ass man you made it this far keep going.
Songs have so much meaning when your over 30, and you know exactly what to feel. We been through and we're here for each other!
music got me through my teens, it made life tolerable.
Yes Lord
I’ve battled anxiety and depression for years. This song always hits home.
Same here man, I lived with depression and anxiety for 9 years.
Just remember
No matter how bad it feels,you're a beautiful person and a blessing to someone
@@JohnDillen77 same
@jamesonmeckes5796 same,& no one understands it.they think it's oh we want to get high..no, I don't want withdrawal s doctors never told the teen version of me, withdrawals, in fact I never heard that word Decade ago
I'm still dealing with depression and anxiety and I'm 43
Happy Mother's Day. This is such a beautiful song showing how Moms never give up on us.
my mom died when i was 18 lol
yeah my mother deals with a ptsd son from the war. and someone who has their child kept from them, and meth is a motherfucker
Some moms do. Some moms make their children their enemy. Some moms never phone. Some moms are not nice at all.
Ummm, mine did. Sent $50 grand by way of their atty, with a cashiers check & my signature that I would NEVER even attempt to reach the family again... I was in ICU at the time. So, I believed that shit about mothers & family too. It's clearly not a blanket thing. My niece was the lucky one. She was cursed too, we were close but to have tenderness & mercy in ur soul was NOT an asset but curse in our genetics. her addiction was starving herself to death w/ a silver spoon in her mouth at 19, striving for perfection, anything less not acceptable, me? The tea service silver spoons were in my bag & I chose altered states of mind & so it goes...is mother still alive? No clue
My brother just died so I came here. Rip lil brother love you always. Gone but never to be forgotten.
Sorry for your loss I’m here over the loss of my husband. Take care of yourself
I’m sorry for your loss.
Look up Sully urna... song "until then". Sorry for your loss.
I lost my brother, sister and dad 😢 it's hard 😭
Just a quick scroll through comments and I give many kudos to all who have overcome addiction, it's a daily battle, and every single one of you are magnificent for fighting and winning that battle every day. For those still fighting that daily battle, please know (if you don't already) that you're hurting the ones you love just as much as you are yourselves. I have lost the person I cared most about in the world due to their lack of ability to see their addiction as an issue, and it still cuts me to the core every day. I hope anybody who is still in the throes of addiction and reading this can acknowledge their issue and find help with it. Bless.
Neko Sama that is so thoughtful!
God bless u Nico and thank you for that post. Instead of bashing you were as positive as you could be while probably crying it's a very heart felt song anyway thank u for not being mean and hateful
Neko Sama I hope u never understand...
Thank you man. I am an addict and finally starting to see the trouble I cause the ones I love. Your comment is very real and very appreciated and one of the few TH-cam comments that has touched me. So, thank you.
C. Creature sometimes it seems it doesn’t matter how much u love ur loved ones that drug can be bigger than all of that shit. I have a 15 yr. old and I’d literally die for her today right this very second I am in recovery but my love for her doesn’t keep the bottom from falling out sometimes like u said it’s an everyday battle today I’m winning tom. Who knows