@@ArtingFromScratch I'm pretty sure Jessica's sweater is the Henry Woodland Fair Isle Jumper in green from Joanie Clothing (I also really like it and did a little google-sleuthing)
I read the transcript for your thoughts on the Elf on the Shelf (really not feeling like watching the video just yet sorry, headache acting up) and honestly the very idea that "these holidays are stressful let's not stress children out more with a thing that is all do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do while also giving parents extra work" is so thoughtful. I'm from a culture that doesn't do Christmas (from India) but the extremely considerate thought process here is something I'm not used to for any of my own festivals. I have terrible memories of needing to be on my best behaviour for a time of joy when my physical and mental health were acting up. Honestly touches me so much, thank you for thinking that far ahead. I think the dolls themselves are adorable and I'd even like some of them despite not celebrating any Western cultural festival (and due to religious trauma, none of my own either! So no holiday seasons for me) just because they look cute and cuddly.
As a former professional elf myself who has had a LOT of Christmas themed conversations with kids, if your kid is 6 or older, they probably don’t like your Elf on the Shelf. I have heard so many kids talk about how weird and creepy it is. I don’t have any firm data on this but around age 6 is when kids start feeling more of a desire and need for privacy. And the idea of being spied on makes them uncomfortable. Rightly so. I can’t tell you how many times I had the following conversation: “are you an elf like my elf at home (insert elf name)?” “No, there are different kinds of elves.” “Oh. Good. I think my elf at home is kind of creepy.” And then they flit off to story time or letters to Santa. I should always note that whenever the question of “reality” came up, my response was always “well, what do you think?” It allows space for them to think critically and make their own decision. I’m seriously thinking of doing a TikTok series of all of the secrets Christmas professionals won’t tell you. Kids say the most UNHINGED things to people who act as characters they trust, so I’ve had some crazy interactions.
I was like 'WTF???????' I had to replay it just to make sure I actually heard right! But, then, I cannot really say that I am very surprised, either. I am Muslim and I had some man who wanted to 'see what I looked like underneath'. What the hell is with some people??????? Did nobody ever teach them about boundaries?
Same. Sadly it was probably along the same lines as my grandma who lifted up (well tried to, she was stopped) my sister's skirt in public to look for her "tramp stamp" because she'd gotten a lovely tattoo on her arm and grandma just couldn't stand that in the family.
I didnt know about elf on the shelf until those memes circulated and i was pretty shocked. I find the idea of telling your children that theyre under constant surveillance to be weird? It's like the panopticon thing they did to prisoners, i thought the holidays were supposed to be fun
Well, it's also quite obvious in (American) Christmas songs. I hate "Santa Clause is coming to Town" for this exact reason. I could make a horror movie out of this son ("he sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake..."). I am German and even though I am atheist I prefer the religious songs like "Hark, now hear the angels sing".
Elf on the Shelf was only created in 2005 and only really took off in 2007 it seems to coincide with the rise of social media. I think the elves are creepy and feel really inauthentic and only really for the shallow social media content.
@@Siuresyessss. Atheist American here who used to go carolling every year with my Gramma. Some secular Christmas songs are weird and uncomfortable, while some of the traditional/religious songs are lovely and festive for the holiday. I always preferred those myself.
My 5 year old sister said something like this about Santa Claus recently that it's weird that Santa watchs you all the time. Like no joke she actually call Santa a creepy which won't lie l do agree with her the whole watching you day and night thing is weird as hack.
“I’m deaf, so I’m probably not your best judge, but I thought it was amazing, darling!” “I know, that’s why I married you!” Y’all are so funny together!
I hadn’t heard of elf on the shelf until all the memes started a few years back but I find the concept so creepy. I think the first severe anxiety I ever had was as a small child after being told “Santa’s helpers are always watching you.” Like that kept me awake at night! Also I really appreciated Claudia’s response about friendships. I find as an autistic person I’ve repeatedly made and lost a lot of friends over the years and the reminder to just enjoy the friendship for what it was at the time is something I try to hang on to. Losing friends sucks but looking back every person I’ve been close to has left me with fun memories and has been what I needed at that time.
If the puppy nips you you can say "ow" in a high pitched voice so he knows he hurt you. if he's trying to be affectionate he didn't mean to bite but it's good for him to know that he accidentally hurt you so he can learn to stop
many years ago my gran made a life sized santa doll (kinda like a scarecrow, floppy and not detailed) and would put him in the garden doing all sorts of mischief, on each day leading up to Christmas. He wasn't spying on anyone, just doing activities! She did this for years, it was such an awesome creative outlet. She might still do it, I made a Facebook page for her to post them to so all her friends could easily see! its super cute. Also, she started it before elf on the shelf, but I think the idea of an advent calendar type decoration changing isn't a new thing anyway.
I really like that idea. I have always been against Elf on the Shelf for the same sort of reasons Jessica lists in the video, but I know a lot of parents who felt pressured to get an elf because all the other kids in their child’s social network have that tradition. But an elf who does kind things would even fit in with our family mythology! I live with my in-laws and some tasks are things that aren’t anyone’s assigned job but that just get done by the first person to have a minute. So, you notice that someone got up before you and put on the coffee? “Thanks Coffee Fairy!” You notice that someone refilled all the ice cube trays? “Thanks Ice Pixie!”
exactly. i feel like the way it’s used is the part that turns it bad. the surveillance part is what’s messing with kid’s heads & causing actual trauma! a little mischievous elf that does stuff around the common area (say the living room) every day would be one fun thing, but that’s about it
My daughter is 10 and was so excited to see her elf. Her elf does fun things, never mischievous. Brings little gifts for the pets for her to play with them. But her favorite is growing a candy cane. Last year, she traveled away for xmas, and she had forgotten to pick her candy cane, so it "grew" to a 2lb cane. She was so excited. It can be used to have fun. Some kids really want to believe in magic.
When I was a kid I absolutely loved my elf on the shelf, I still have her actually, and I pretended to believe in Santa for longer than I actually did just so my parents would keep placing her around the house. There was never a big insistence on the whole “elf watching you” thing in my house, and she never really got into trouble, she was just in different hiding places every morning and I would go find her. I had a lot of fun finding her and I plan on keeping the tradition with my kids, more as an elf coming to visit you and see how you’re doing than anything, but I definitely wasn’t traumatized or anything by the elf telling Santa about me, though it was framed more as telling Santa about all of my good behavior and seeing what I might want for Christmas, definitely more lighthearted.
The "when I'm six" thing made me smile. When my two young sons were young, we told them they couldn't play with "war toys" until they were 13, couldn't date until they were 16 (in a small rural town where kids were 'going steady as young as 12), didn't need to think about working until they were 17, etc. They are in their mid-30's now and they both agreed that had been really nice to "blame their parents" for these things, because there had been some serious peer pressure to do things that they didn't really feel ready for.
My parents told my sister she could get her ears pierced when she was 8, since this was years away from when she first started asking they hoped she'd forget. But she didn't and they had to let her 😂
Yep, if I ever have kids I'm gonna give them permission to say "Sorry, my parents said I'm not allowed to" if they aren't comfortable doing something but are being pressured to. Obviously with some boundaries though.
@@waffles3629 I did that as a teenager! Or "My mom said we already had something at that time" to avoid parties I didn't felt like attending. And a few time I went to my parents afterward so they won't snitch by accident.
I accidentally created my own version of elf on the shelf for my family where each of our family members has an elf assigned to them to do enchanted things while we’re out of the house that reflect something about our own personalities. Dad elf once set up a campsite on our fireplace mantle where the kid elves roasted tiny marshmallows over a candle. Mom Elf made cookies one year, and the girls’ elves were making snow angels in the flour sprinkled on the table. When my son was born, I used it as a way to help his stepsisters bond with him. His elf was forever trying to imitate what their elves did, but got it just a little bit wrong… like when sister elves made paper snowflakes and his elf made a valentine card with a few shapes cut out, or when sister-elves made snowmen from marshmallows and his elf made a snowman with green beans arms and baby potato bodies. It’s a lot of extra work, but I love that kind of creativity, and my stepdaughters say it’s their absolute favorite part of Christmas.
Dude I've got chronic pain and PDA Autism. My christmas tree has been up since October 2022. Once I gather up the energy to take it down, that's it gone forever. Who even has time for Elf on the Shelf? I cannot imagine that.
My Christmas tree has to fight get thrown up at high speed on Christmas Eve. I hate the faff. Then it tends to stay up till Easter because I forget it’s there. Adhd and autism. I love trees as well! I’m just too burnt out from life to have Christmas energy.
Yep when I was a kid we only had a really small tree and didn't bother to take it down. Had someone else looking after us for 2 weeks and instead of putting it away she just threw it away in the backyard (fully decorated), we didn't get another tree and none of us cared. Still don't have one.
Elf on the Shelf really took off whenever I was in university. I didn't have kids then (and still don't, but the time where I feel ready for them is rapidly approaching), but the thought of coming up with new scenarios for the elf to be getting into every single night made my ADHD brain immediately become revulsed by the idea. That is one Christmas tradition my spouse and I will never do in our house - on top of the moral and ethical "surveillance state" issues that give us both the ick.
Elf on a shelf is just another version of that poster from that episode of Red Dwarf, but for kids. *"Be a government informant! Betray your family and friends! Fabulous prizes to be won!"*
Read the book _Red Scarf Girl_ sometime. It's about how China during the cultural revolution operated like that and urged children to turn in family members, neighbors or schoolmates who weren't giving up ancient traditions.
Aw, Bertie is adorable!! 😍 18:20 The whole conversation about not showing his face on social media is great, I believe it should be their choice when they get older. Good parents 🥰 Side note on that subject! I could really see a movie being made out of your tangent conversation from it; not having mirrors in the house, never seeing his face and such lol (I know that was just side banter, but to me it was a "that would make a great movie!" thought) Love you! Thank you for the fun answers! I've been subscribed for at least 6 years now, and I've loved how you've both grown so much, got married, had Rupert, and moved to a better house! I live in the states, been in the same place for the past 13 years (I'm on disability so I live vicariously through the internet's LGBTQ community online once I started my transition about 7 years ago and was looking for channels to help me through my tough times). I live in a small town (population under 10,000 in northern Minnesota). So, needless to say, not much going on where I live! The excitement lately has been the lakes are starting to freeze over lol Yay.
I've found the elf on the shelf really hard. I don't like it or the story with it but now my son is in school (year1) he's become more aware of it and is sad one doesn't come to our house. So this year I've got one but it doesn't do anything other than bring then a word a day that makes a nice message for by the time we get to christmas. I also don't want to do lots of things every night so I've just write the message out and cut it up to put one put each day. It is a weird concept in general with the elf.
My son wants one this year too. I've decided Elf is going to pick which book we read that day. We already do an activity centered advent calendar, so I guess Elf is going to be part of it. I like the Christmas message idea. Might borrow it.
We did a very paired back version. Eddy (our elf) arrived on Dec 1st and just moved locations around our house every night until Christmas Eve. Every morning the kids loved looking for him. We did this for 10 years. It really added to the magic of Christmas
I've only really seen/noticed 'Elf On The Shelf' in the last ten years or so, so I think it's pretty new, but I could have just not been paying attention before that. There's an article somewhere with the very charged title, "Elf On The Shelf Prepares Your Child To Live In A Police State", citing the 'constant surveillance and reporting back to an authority figure' presentation of the 'game', and that was the first time I saw the doll really being discussed. (Prior to that, I had seen them in toy stores and bookshops, but the doll style wasn't my aesthetic so I didn't look too closely.) Apparently some kids have had actual meltdowns directly related to the elf, since the kids have to be on their Best Behaviour, at all times, because The Elf Is Watching, instead of being able to relax in their own homes. Fun trivia about the colour green: (with the exception of colour blindness) humans can perceive more shades of green than of any other colour, because it is in the centre of our visual spectrum.
We had Elf on a Shelf when I was growing up decades ago. It was probably just a trend that went away and then returned. Of course, we used it more as a decorative prank rather than a creeper.
Thank you, I needed this video today. I did make it to the end and I'm glad because the "Global warming is real" "It is real" "But nobody asked you!" Was worth it😂
My sister, for her daughters, had no plans on introducing the elf and we as a family agreed. However when her eldest started school they played the movie for the kids and she came home crying, thinking she wasn’t on the good list because she didn’t have an elf that visited. We quickly had to find an elf last minute, they named her Peppermint. I still think it’s wild that they chose to play that holiday movie, probably not caring how it might affect the children or parents that had to go out and buy the elves.
This would have triggered my contrary nature and I would have found a way to convince my spawn that not having an elf doesn't mean anything bad. Might even go all out and make it seem a good thing depending on my mood and how creative I felt in the moment.
I can’t have children, but you can bet that if I’d been able the school would have found a way to put me in detention. I hated school stupidity when I was a pupil myself, and was fortunate that my parents were sensible and told me to just ignore them. But it seems these days everything is so heavily policed you can get away with very little, the school dictates everything. I appreciate it might save some children in very dangerous situations so I’m not knocking that. But when it comes to things like this any suggestion that I should will automatically lead to me refusing to do it. I don’t even decorate until the 24th, so that poor kid would have a very frustrating December trying to balance school nonsense with what is going on at home.
@@dees3179 So I'm not the only who feels that sometimes parents are the ones that need detention........ With that said, are you implying that you'd march up to the school and tear them a new one for making your child think they were bad since they didn't have an elf?
o.O I grew up with a vintage 50s Elf on the Shelf courtesy of my grandma (it's actually sitting on a shelf beside my computer desk as I type), but nobody ever told me anything about him being some sort of Santa spy. That's unhinged.
My mom's family also had one in the 50s, which I currently have, and she was horrified a couple years ago when I told her about the current spy lore that emerged much more recently (2000s-2010s). We've decided as a family that our lovely vintage elf is not associated with the new surveillance elves, just coincidentally happens to look similar.
The best Christmases have been the low effort, rest, be in cosy clothes with a few people that you want to be with and next to nothing of the decorations and none of the stress... and you only get a few presents that you actually wanted. No yelling at me for being overwhelmed and disappointed by all the stuff I didn't want. No guilt tripping for a week after Christmas. Yeah, Christmas and getting presents became traumatic, repeatedly. Do less, get more out of it!
Exactly. Christmas day is for my partner and I, no one else. I'll message my sister and a couple friends, but other than that we just spend the day together as the two of us. We'll bake cookies or something, make hot cocoa and watch a movie. My decorations are a string of snowflake lights clothespinned to the blinds and a couple of those gel window decorations.
I never really leaned into the "report back to Santa" part, just a little jackass elf wreaking havoc for fun LOL I can see those two things causing conflict
In Denmark we don't have a elf on the shelf, but each school class usually has a traveling elf (which is very naughty) and then the elf has a diary where you write about the elf's adventures for the night. So it's not based on the childs behavior, but it's a little game for when you wake up to see what the elf has done. In my childhood, I remember the elf taking over the dogs basket, writing Merry Christmas on the mirror, eating all the chocolate (probably my mother's idea that one to handle the surplus of treats in the holiday season 🤣) I loved this tradition, as it was a real bonding and collective experience esp with other kids in school.
I remember when the elf on a shelf thing was gaining internet traction. I was confused cause it seemed like an actual tradition people knew about. Then I looked it up and found out it was just something fabricated out of a Christmas book someone wrote in like the early 2000s (somewhere around there? ) and was like, nope nope nope. It never sounded like an appealing idea to me either and it really smacks of early influencers stepping into heavy corporation advertising. I find it such a strange thing to stress over.
I'm so surprised by the popularity of elf on the shelf because I had never heard of it growing up - even though the book was published in 2005 which would be the perfect time for my younger brother - but it seems the opposite of every parenting advice I have heard that is backed by modern data. Very weird to me *Edited because I forget coding formats affect some text on TH-cam and I didn't mean to strike through
Elf on the Shelf wasn’t a “Thing” when I was a kid (although it was around) but my mom did something fundamentally similar called “Super Elf” which was basically where if we weren’t behaving she would tell us she was going to call “Super Elf” who would tell Santa not to make us presents, and that we would get coal. Weirdly enough, this did not get us to behave. Instead, it would get my brother and I all worked up crying and begging our mom not to call “Super Elf.” I don’t remember what we were doing wrong, but I do remember the crying. Finding out Santa was my parents was a different sort of betrayal because of the added emotional manipulation that went on there. Anyways, if Life decides that kids are in my path, Santa is just going to be a myth, and not a tool to get them to behave. 😅
How do you envisage the interaction of not labelling kids + disability rights/activism/positivity? I’m autistic and was diagnosed over a decade ago as a young teenager, but it took me *years* to get over a feeling like I shouldn’t be labelling myself, that using the label would just restrict me by shaping my self-perception and that of others. I did not grow up in an environment that said labels are bad, I just got fed the idea that maybe labelling yourself autistic might not be a good thing by doctors involved in the diagnosis pathway. But when I think on it, their reasoning sounds a lot like the Montessori idea (from my limited understanding). That was the thing that screwed me over - because the same thing that gave me relief that there was a reason I was weird, I was not alone, and I was not a bad person for struggling, also made me feel shameful and guilty for putting myself in a box, restricting my self-perception etc. I worry slightly that a refusal to put labels on kids can be enabling to normative societal pressures - eg not labelling a kid as shy becoming a refusal to acknowledge an aspect of legitimate personality, becoming an unspoken pressure to not *be* shy. Or substitute any label there that you want. I can also see your reasoning for avoiding labelling kids, and it’s a tough balance. Any ideas?
I believe the words out of my mouth the first time I saw this thing was: "What in the post-9/11 surveillance state is going on here? For children???!!"
My children are 9, 7 and 3 months. This year is the first year we're doing Elf on a shelf, but we won't be doing the 'I'm watching you' side of things. We will just do innocent but silly things. Like put it in the baby's nappy caddy with a clean nappy on it's head, or make it look like it's playing on a games console. My 9 year old won't care but my 7 year old will find it funny. Just a little bit of Christmas fun and if the kids want to play with it they can, if they get fed up half way through December it doesn't matter. All we're trying to achieve is making the kids laugh.
Apparently the 'naughty' behaviour that the elf doesn't know how to behave and children need to show him how to be 'good'. Personally I'm not a fan of elf on the shelf. I think families have already a lot to think about during the festive season and it's just one more thing ❤
I once put Elf on the shelf in the toaster, and Gran didn't take him out before making toast so the elf got a burnt bum 😂 We didn't have the regular elf though. I made the damn thing and had to re make Eddies backside 😂
I always enjoy Jessica’s conversations with Claudia! ❤ Bertie is adorable and Elf on the Shelf is just entertainment to me (I’ve seen those pictures of Elf on the Shelf getting into trouble or getting into danger). 😊 This doll didn’t exist when I was a kid though.
There's even a parody Jewish version called Mensch on a Bench. There are pages online with ideas for what to do if you're a parent who's forgetful and didn't move the elf. A friend collects photos of naughty Elf on the Shelf poses he has seen online.
I share that sentiment about childhood friends and I agree, it is kind of difficult to describe. Like, it's the first cohort you are a part of, heck it might be the only cohort you find yourself in but there is a horizontal... innocence (?) to those within it. I never put high expectations or pressure on my peers, nor felt any. It was mainly support, sometimes friction, but mainly curiosity all around. We all felt the pressures and expectations from the rest of the world and we were all just figuring it out together you know? It might very well be the first time a person registers a sense of camaraderie, and that's a very powerful feeling. I mean, in times of conflict it causes soldiers to re-enlist rather than rotate back into civilian life. And like all powerful feelings or passions, be prepared for those who will capitalize on that and twist it against you
The whole concept of “are you good” or “are you naughty” is very vague. Especially whenever you watch or read a Christmas story and there is a child who is “naughty”, it’s normal just kids being kids. Like a kid running with scissors (a kid wouldn’t know that’s dangerous, unless they are told that information, but in those stories, that kid is naughty). Also the concept of that naughty kids get coal, is weird when you learn that coal used to be very helpful by warming the house, back before electric heat was common in most homes. Also there are pizza restaurants, where I live that still use coal-burning fires, to make the pizzas. Also I’ve never heard of an actual child who actually got coal for Christmas. The “worst” presents, I’ve heard of, was getting underwear or socks, but sometimes that’s all the parents could afford and they are practically items. I really wish we got rid of the “good kid” vs “naughty kid” stereotype.
The fact that you feel the need to remove a sticker to be mindful of others around you or to feel safe is beyond heartbreaking! I hate that for the longest time it only felt like we were progressing as a society, but the past few years have been a just downright scary regression. I always have said that you should absolutely never tone yourself down in any setting, always be you 110%. Stay safe and stay lovely! 🤍🤍
my family loved ours, it made us food and helped decorate and got up to mischief occasionally, like when they tied santa to the ceiling we had a whole backstory by the end, one elf married my barbie and had 3 kids, his sister also came and then their wacky cousin so by the end there was 6 elves and a barbie visiting 😂 chaos, but i woke up every morning excited
Elf on the Shelf is “secular”, but the book points towards Christianity. The layers involved gives me the ick. And I hate how TH-cam families normalized the elf bringing daily presents.
I did elf on the shelf, mostly though just hiding it and then in the morning you find wherever the elf hid. Lot less stressful for parents and children!
In my friend group, we call ourselves the Golden Girls, after the tv show. We are in our mid 50’s, but have been friends since we were 10. We have a group chat, and try to have dinner with all of us together at least once or twice a year. If something big comes up in our lives or just feeling bad, the others are there on the chat for support.
I love how when you said you didn't participate in Elf On The Shelf growing up it sounded like it was because its an American thing, and not because it was only invented in like 2005 (wow thought it was newer than that tbh).
When my ex and I were still together and my uncle was still alive, hubby served an invaluable function at family gatherings because he and my cranky, crotchety, cantankerous uncle bonded over a few topics such as nature. So if Uncle Max got grouchy, hubby could be dispatched to go talk plants or birds and calm him down.
@ Yes! It’s nice when someone without a history can step in to distract. My wife is genuinely amused by most things my Dad says, me not so much. Don’t get me wrong, I love my Dad, I like my Dad, but in social situations he can be so extra.
As a child I woke up on Christmas Day to a stocking full of cinders because I was, admittedly, a brat that year. I can’t tell you the devastation that comes when you realise that Santa hates you. I did eventually get some gifts on Boxing Day but can’t recommend the cinders route for children.
I've never seen it, as it doesn't sound like my thing, but a cousin who had once sent our uncle on a rant inadvertently. He was waxing nostalgic for some scarce childhood fun and happened to mention a BB gun he'd had. "You could put somebody's eye out with that!" my cousin cheerfully piped up, quoting the movie (having not seen the movie, I may not have quoted it quite right but you know the line). He didn't know it was just a movie quote and started ranting about how if you're carefully taught how to use it and how not to use it, that would never happen, etc. etc. etc. We all freaked out a bit because this was an uncle who got worked up easily, and it had been going so nicely until her innocent mistake. Thank goodness my ex and I were still together at the time, so I could get him to engage my uncle on one of his few good subjects to turn the tide. But that for me is my inextricably-connected instant flashback when anyone mentions _A Christmas Story_ .
It's ok, I like trees too ❤😂 Currently obsessed with an insta account that shows really, really miniature bonsais; like a couple-centimeters-across-pot size bonsais?? The big ones are great too lol
I'm bad at staying in touch with people, but I open myself for all of my friends throughout my entire life to find me and talk to me anytime they think of me. Every once in a while, they do, or I do, and we catch up. It's quite comforting, honestly. I haven't spoke to one of my absolute best friends in life for almost a year now, but I know someday she's going to contact me and invite me to hang out for breakfast or tea at her house. I still have unlit candles we made together in her studio some years ago. They're precious to me. Of course, I'm shy, but I do sometimes gain the courage to say hi to people in my past. You know you have good friends when that time distance feels like just yesterday and you can talk like no time has passed. Really, truly, friendship with me is easy to jump into, but hard to get out of. I love all my friends to bits. I've also just been lucky as a trans woman to grow up around good people. I like to think I helped foster that environment around me.
My parents never did the "Santa brigs presents to good children" thing and neither did I. I never understood why people think it's a good idea, it sounds like a lot of stress for everyone involved. So of course Elf on the shelf sounds like a horror story to me. I've heard a lot of people telling that they hate the idea of Santa because they where basically blackmailed to obedience. It's so far from my experience of a benevolent entity giving gifts for no reason! So I went with that approach for my kids too. The oldest one knows the true and is very happy to keep the secret for his younger sibling, so I think we're doing great.
25:35 Luckily for me I'm not having to pack the dishwasher, because my sisters-in-law did that last night before they left! My first time ever to have everyone over at the holidays, and it went quite well (apart from my sweet namesake niece accidentally putting the ham in the freezer Wednesday night instead of the refrigerator - thank goodness someone had given my younger sister-in-law two turkeys!).
4:35 I completley understand where you're coming from, however I do think that it can be quite different for trans people. Claudia as much as it sucks that people assume that you're straight, at least people are going to use the right name and pronouns for you
On the elf in the shelf thing, my parents didn’t do that but we did have this tradition called Minion November. My mom and dad had a collection of minion toys, and every morning they would place them around the house. They would be washing dishes, or playing with my mom’s clarinet. It was great and we loved it.
Yay, Montessori families! We don’t label either, absolutely no elf on the shelf. We’re also not doing Santa/Father Christmas and celebrate Winter Solstice instead of Christmas (because of our other beliefs). Anyone else not doing Santa? Kids are 4 and 2, so not sure how it will play out yet.
You know why they lick faces? It's because that is how they pet you. This is how they let you know they love you. Their paws are not hands:) in packs too, it is a sign of respect and calm to let the other know they mean no harm.
My nephews LOVED elf on a shelf. They asked for them for Christmas several years back and my brother went all out to make it fun for them. They're not just surveillance cameras that sit on a shelf. They get up to mischief in the middle of the night and make holiday themed messes or *give gifts to the kids and the nephews love going on a little scavenger hunt in the morning to find where they've moved to. In my opinion the elf on a shelf isn't really any different from the notion that Santa "sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake." I understand people's criticisms of the toy but I think we as adults need to understand that kids don't think about things the way we do, and if done right the elf on the shelf is a fun holiday experience for younger kids, that creates fun memories.
My daughter hates dolls, and for many years elf on the shelf was no different. As she got older she wanted to get a couple of them, so we did. We made it more about working together to create funny/silly scenarios for the elf for an annual christmas photo, rather than about watching kids behaviour. And for the past few years we've ended up using one of the elves as a christmas tree topper.
Wow... never in my life, even as a little kid, have I ever had a stranger (or anyone for that matter) ask if I've been good or bad around Christmas, or any other time. I didn't know that was a thing. Of course my family kept up the whole "kids with good behavior get presents and bad behavior gets nothing", but it was always just my mom n step dad saying it. And of course they stopped by the time I was 7 and knew there was no Santa.
Part 2 will be coming next week for CHANNEL MEMBERS ONLY!
Woo hoo!!
Hello, my friends.
I wish I had the budget for things like that. Thank you for having part one free
Jessica.. where is your sweater...jumper from?
@@ArtingFromScratch I'm pretty sure Jessica's sweater is the Henry Woodland Fair Isle Jumper in green from Joanie Clothing (I also really like it and did a little google-sleuthing)
I read the transcript for your thoughts on the Elf on the Shelf (really not feeling like watching the video just yet sorry, headache acting up) and honestly the very idea that "these holidays are stressful let's not stress children out more with a thing that is all do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do while also giving parents extra work" is so thoughtful. I'm from a culture that doesn't do Christmas (from India) but the extremely considerate thought process here is something I'm not used to for any of my own festivals. I have terrible memories of needing to be on my best behaviour for a time of joy when my physical and mental health were acting up. Honestly touches me so much, thank you for thinking that far ahead. I think the dolls themselves are adorable and I'd even like some of them despite not celebrating any Western cultural festival (and due to religious trauma, none of my own either! So no holiday seasons for me) just because they look cute and cuddly.
Thank you for taking the time to read the transcript and commenting despite your headache 💖 I hope it passes soon.
Thanks for sharing! It's interesting to learn that kids all around the world experience similar issues around holidays
I also sometimes read transcripts instead of watching videos! Especially if it’s something weighty - I retain written information better ❤
As a former professional elf myself who has had a LOT of Christmas themed conversations with kids, if your kid is 6 or older, they probably don’t like your Elf on the Shelf. I have heard so many kids talk about how weird and creepy it is. I don’t have any firm data on this but around age 6 is when kids start feeling more of a desire and need for privacy. And the idea of being spied on makes them uncomfortable. Rightly so. I can’t tell you how many times I had the following conversation: “are you an elf like my elf at home (insert elf name)?” “No, there are different kinds of elves.” “Oh. Good. I think my elf at home is kind of creepy.” And then they flit off to story time or letters to Santa. I should always note that whenever the question of “reality” came up, my response was always “well, what do you think?” It allows space for them to think critically and make their own decision. I’m seriously thinking of doing a TikTok series of all of the secrets Christmas professionals won’t tell you. Kids say the most UNHINGED things to people who act as characters they trust, so I’ve had some crazy interactions.
I'd love to know your stories!
I fully support you making an in-depth series full of insider knowledge about what goes on in the minds of Christmas-addled children 😅
I literally gasped when Claudia mentioned the guy who came up to Jessica and lifted up her petticoat.
What was he thinking??
I was like 'WTF???????' I had to replay it just to make sure I actually heard right! But, then, I cannot really say that I am very surprised, either. I am Muslim and I had some man who wanted to 'see what I looked like underneath'. What the hell is with some people??????? Did nobody ever teach them about boundaries?
Same. Sadly it was probably along the same lines as my grandma who lifted up (well tried to, she was stopped) my sister's skirt in public to look for her "tramp stamp" because she'd gotten a lovely tattoo on her arm and grandma just couldn't stand that in the family.
I didnt know about elf on the shelf until those memes circulated and i was pretty shocked. I find the idea of telling your children that theyre under constant surveillance to be weird? It's like the panopticon thing they did to prisoners, i thought the holidays were supposed to be fun
As soon as I saw “panopticon”, it brought me back to my undergrad days discussing Foucault as if we knew what we were talking about! 😬
Well, it's also quite obvious in (American) Christmas songs. I hate "Santa Clause is coming to Town" for this exact reason. I could make a horror movie out of this son ("he sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake...").
I am German and even though I am atheist I prefer the religious songs like "Hark, now hear the angels sing".
Elf on the Shelf was only created in 2005 and only really took off in 2007 it seems to coincide with the rise of social media. I think the elves are creepy and feel really inauthentic and only really for the shallow social media content.
Let's not forget the not touching the elf under ANY circumstances thing. I've heard some horror stories about that aspect.
@@Siuresyessss. Atheist American here who used to go carolling every year with my Gramma. Some secular Christmas songs are weird and uncomfortable, while some of the traditional/religious songs are lovely and festive for the holiday. I always preferred those myself.
Let’s be real, the idea of “elf on the shelf” is creepy. Like just some little creature watching everything you do?
Like Google?
My 5 year old sister said something like this about Santa Claus recently that it's weird that Santa watchs you all the time.
Like no joke she actually call Santa a creepy which won't lie l do agree with her the whole watching you day and night thing is weird as hack.
@@emo8071 Smart sister.
@ google as a feature would be kinda funny 🤣🤣🤣
Your phone does that
Elf on the Shelf is CURSED and it's the epitome of Corporate Christmas. I hate it so much!
It's all about indoctrinating kids to accept constant surveillance by unaccountable authorities.
Harrowing.
“I’m deaf, so I’m probably not your best judge, but I thought it was amazing, darling!”
“I know, that’s why I married you!”
Y’all are so funny together!
They are so quick and witty with their banter!
I love their conversations and banter with each other ! ❤
My daughter is 3, she doesn’t have a target year for doing the “grown up” stuff. She loves to say “can I do ____ when I’m older?” Including “Be a cat”
I mean she could become a Broadway star and be in the musical cats. You don't know how determined she might be to be a cat. 😂
@ActualLiteralKyle That is so adorable!
That sounds reasonable. Wanting to be a cat I mean.
@@Miss_Kisa94 lol as long as it’s Broadway and not a 2042 reboot of the movie
Logo more than you can imagine @@Spagettigeist exactly right did a pretty objective analysis, no notes, being a cat is dope.
I hadn’t heard of elf on the shelf until all the memes started a few years back but I find the concept so creepy.
I think the first severe anxiety I ever had was as a small child after being told “Santa’s helpers are always watching you.” Like that kept me awake at night!
Also I really appreciated Claudia’s response about friendships. I find as an autistic person I’ve repeatedly made and lost a lot of friends over the years and the reminder to just enjoy the friendship for what it was at the time is something I try to hang on to. Losing friends sucks but looking back every person I’ve been close to has left me with fun memories and has been what I needed at that time.
If the puppy nips you you can say "ow" in a high pitched voice so he knows he hurt you. if he's trying to be affectionate he didn't mean to bite but it's good for him to know that he accidentally hurt you so he can learn to stop
many years ago my gran made a life sized santa doll (kinda like a scarecrow, floppy and not detailed) and would put him in the garden doing all sorts of mischief, on each day leading up to Christmas. He wasn't spying on anyone, just doing activities!
She did this for years, it was such an awesome creative outlet. She might still do it, I made a Facebook page for her to post them to so all her friends could easily see! its super cute.
Also, she started it before elf on the shelf, but I think the idea of an advent calendar type decoration changing isn't a new thing anyway.
Santa doing Activities in the Garden sounds hilarious! :D
I don't have kids (yet), but I think if I used the Elf, I'd make them do little acts of kindness up until Christmas.
I really like that idea. I have always been against Elf on the Shelf for the same sort of reasons Jessica lists in the video, but I know a lot of parents who felt pressured to get an elf because all the other kids in their child’s social network have that tradition.
But an elf who does kind things would even fit in with our family mythology! I live with my in-laws and some tasks are things that aren’t anyone’s assigned job but that just get done by the first person to have a minute. So, you notice that someone got up before you and put on the coffee? “Thanks Coffee Fairy!” You notice that someone refilled all the ice cube trays? “Thanks Ice Pixie!”
exactly. i feel like the way it’s used is the part that turns it bad. the surveillance part is what’s messing with kid’s heads & causing actual trauma! a little mischievous elf that does stuff around the common area (say the living room) every day would be one fun thing, but that’s about it
My daughter is 10 and was so excited to see her elf. Her elf does fun things, never mischievous. Brings little gifts for the pets for her to play with them. But her favorite is growing a candy cane. Last year, she traveled away for xmas, and she had forgotten to pick her candy cane, so it "grew" to a 2lb cane. She was so excited. It can be used to have fun. Some kids really want to believe in magic.
12:51 Maya Angelou said that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I’ve found that to be profoundly true.
That’s a wonderful quote.
When I was a kid I absolutely loved my elf on the shelf, I still have her actually, and I pretended to believe in Santa for longer than I actually did just so my parents would keep placing her around the house. There was never a big insistence on the whole “elf watching you” thing in my house, and she never really got into trouble, she was just in different hiding places every morning and I would go find her.
I had a lot of fun finding her and I plan on keeping the tradition with my kids, more as an elf coming to visit you and see how you’re doing than anything, but I definitely wasn’t traumatized or anything by the elf telling Santa about me, though it was framed more as telling Santa about all of my good behavior and seeing what I might want for Christmas, definitely more lighthearted.
The "when I'm six" thing made me smile. When my two young sons were young, we told them they couldn't play with "war toys" until they were 13, couldn't date until they were 16 (in a small rural town where kids were 'going steady as young as 12), didn't need to think about working until they were 17, etc. They are in their mid-30's now and they both agreed that had been really nice to "blame their parents" for these things, because there had been some serious peer pressure to do things that they didn't really feel ready for.
My parents told my sister she could get her ears pierced when she was 8, since this was years away from when she first started asking they hoped she'd forget. But she didn't and they had to let her 😂
My parents did something similar where I couldn’t sit in the front seat until I was 13. I abided to that rule like it was the law.
Yep, if I ever have kids I'm gonna give them permission to say "Sorry, my parents said I'm not allowed to" if they aren't comfortable doing something but are being pressured to. Obviously with some boundaries though.
@@waffles3629 I did that as a teenager! Or "My mom said we already had something at that time" to avoid parties I didn't felt like attending. And a few time I went to my parents afterward so they won't snitch by accident.
@@neea8807 I'm glad you had that. More parents should have their kids backs.
I accidentally created my own version of elf on the shelf for my family where each of our family members has an elf assigned to them to do enchanted things while we’re out of the house that reflect something about our own personalities. Dad elf once set up a campsite on our fireplace mantle where the kid elves roasted tiny marshmallows over a candle. Mom Elf made cookies one year, and the girls’ elves were making snow angels in the flour sprinkled on the table. When my son was born, I used it as a way to help his stepsisters bond with him. His elf was forever trying to imitate what their elves did, but got it just a little bit wrong… like when sister elves made paper snowflakes and his elf made a valentine card with a few shapes cut out, or when sister-elves made snowmen from marshmallows and his elf made a snowman with green beans arms and baby potato bodies. It’s a lot of extra work, but I love that kind of creativity, and my stepdaughters say it’s their absolute favorite part of Christmas.
Dude I've got chronic pain and PDA Autism. My christmas tree has been up since October 2022. Once I gather up the energy to take it down, that's it gone forever. Who even has time for Elf on the Shelf? I cannot imagine that.
We hung up Christmas lights from the ceiling like four years ago. They're staying there forever lol
My Christmas tree has to fight get thrown up at high speed on Christmas Eve. I hate the faff. Then it tends to stay up till Easter because I forget it’s there.
Adhd and autism.
I love trees as well! I’m just too burnt out from life to have Christmas energy.
Yep when I was a kid we only had a really small tree and didn't bother to take it down. Had someone else looking after us for 2 weeks and instead of putting it away she just threw it away in the backyard (fully decorated), we didn't get another tree and none of us cared. Still don't have one.
Elf on the Shelf really took off whenever I was in university. I didn't have kids then (and still don't, but the time where I feel ready for them is rapidly approaching), but the thought of coming up with new scenarios for the elf to be getting into every single night made my ADHD brain immediately become revulsed by the idea. That is one Christmas tradition my spouse and I will never do in our house - on top of the moral and ethical "surveillance state" issues that give us both the ick.
Elf on a shelf is just another version of that poster from that episode of Red Dwarf, but for kids.
*"Be a government informant! Betray your family and friends! Fabulous prizes to be won!"*
Read the book _Red Scarf Girl_ sometime. It's about how China during the cultural revolution operated like that and urged children to turn in family members, neighbors or schoolmates who weren't giving up ancient traditions.
As a child I was terrified by the elf on the shelf at my friends' house haha
❤
I too loathe Elf on the Shelf and am SO SO very relieved that my kids grew up before the trend reached the UK. It's just adds to pressure on Mums!
Likewise, but my grandchildren like to look for the gingerbread ornament who "moves" around my tree to talk to the other decorations.
Love Actually is a villain arc for most of the characters, lol
Happy Birthday to Claudia! I hope this coming year is gentle and fun and gives you lots of reasons to smile. 🎂
Aw, Bertie is adorable!! 😍
18:20 The whole conversation about not showing his face on social media is great, I believe it should be their choice when they get older. Good parents 🥰
Side note on that subject! I could really see a movie being made out of your tangent conversation from it; not having mirrors in the house, never seeing his face and such lol (I know that was just side banter, but to me it was a "that would make a great movie!" thought)
Love you! Thank you for the fun answers! I've been subscribed for at least 6 years now, and I've loved how you've both grown so much, got married, had Rupert, and moved to a better house!
I live in the states, been in the same place for the past 13 years (I'm on disability so I live vicariously through the internet's LGBTQ community online once I started my transition about 7 years ago and was looking for channels to help me through my tough times). I live in a small town (population under 10,000 in northern Minnesota). So, needless to say, not much going on where I live! The excitement lately has been the lakes are starting to freeze over lol Yay.
I've found the elf on the shelf really hard. I don't like it or the story with it but now my son is in school (year1) he's become more aware of it and is sad one doesn't come to our house. So this year I've got one but it doesn't do anything other than bring then a word a day that makes a nice message for by the time we get to christmas. I also don't want to do lots of things every night so I've just write the message out and cut it up to put one put each day. It is a weird concept in general with the elf.
I've heard ppl tell their kids it only visits naughty children haha
My son wants one this year too. I've decided Elf is going to pick which book we read that day. We already do an activity centered advent calendar, so I guess Elf is going to be part of it. I like the Christmas message idea. Might borrow it.
Thank you for answering my question! I feel special 🥰 glad you are also not a fan of that nosy Elf 😄
We did a very paired back version. Eddy (our elf) arrived on Dec 1st and just moved locations around our house every night until Christmas Eve. Every morning the kids loved looking for him. We did this for 10 years. It really added to the magic of Christmas
I've only really seen/noticed 'Elf On The Shelf' in the last ten years or so, so I think it's pretty new, but I could have just not been paying attention before that. There's an article somewhere with the very charged title, "Elf On The Shelf Prepares Your Child To Live In A Police State", citing the 'constant surveillance and reporting back to an authority figure' presentation of the 'game', and that was the first time I saw the doll really being discussed. (Prior to that, I had seen them in toy stores and bookshops, but the doll style wasn't my aesthetic so I didn't look too closely.) Apparently some kids have had actual meltdowns directly related to the elf, since the kids have to be on their Best Behaviour, at all times, because The Elf Is Watching, instead of being able to relax in their own homes.
Fun trivia about the colour green: (with the exception of colour blindness) humans can perceive more shades of green than of any other colour, because it is in the centre of our visual spectrum.
Yeah, I saw it adversitsed as a Walgreen as a kid. I agree that it's a newer tradition!
We had Elf on a Shelf when I was growing up decades ago. It was probably just a trend that went away and then returned. Of course, we used it more as a decorative prank rather than a creeper.
Jessica's ADHD kicking in over Love Actually film: 'yeah, move along, move along' lol. I'm AuDHD btw, so totally get you 😊❤
Thank you, I needed this video today. I did make it to the end and I'm glad because the
"Global warming is real"
"It is real"
"But nobody asked you!"
Was worth it😂
My sister, for her daughters, had no plans on introducing the elf and we as a family agreed. However when her eldest started school they played the movie for the kids and she came home crying, thinking she wasn’t on the good list because she didn’t have an elf that visited. We quickly had to find an elf last minute, they named her Peppermint. I still think it’s wild that they chose to play that holiday movie, probably not caring how it might affect the children or parents that had to go out and buy the elves.
Oh no! and then the parents that can't afford it.. the poor kids will think they did something wrong. =( That makes me sad.
This would have triggered my contrary nature and I would have found a way to convince my spawn that not having an elf doesn't mean anything bad. Might even go all out and make it seem a good thing depending on my mood and how creative I felt in the moment.
I can’t have children, but you can bet that if I’d been able the school would have found a way to put me in detention. I hated school stupidity when I was a pupil myself, and was fortunate that my parents were sensible and told me to just ignore them. But it seems these days everything is so heavily policed you can get away with very little, the school dictates everything. I appreciate it might save some children in very dangerous situations so I’m not knocking that. But when it comes to things like this any suggestion that I should will automatically lead to me refusing to do it. I don’t even decorate until the 24th, so that poor kid would have a very frustrating December trying to balance school nonsense with what is going on at home.
@@dees3179
So I'm not the only who feels that sometimes parents are the ones that need detention........
With that said, are you implying that you'd march up to the school and tear them a new one for making your child think they were bad since they didn't have an elf?
o.O I grew up with a vintage 50s Elf on the Shelf courtesy of my grandma (it's actually sitting on a shelf beside my computer desk as I type), but nobody ever told me anything about him being some sort of Santa spy. That's unhinged.
My mom's family also had one in the 50s, which I currently have, and she was horrified a couple years ago when I told her about the current spy lore that emerged much more recently (2000s-2010s). We've decided as a family that our lovely vintage elf is not associated with the new surveillance elves, just coincidentally happens to look similar.
The best Christmases have been the low effort, rest, be in cosy clothes with a few people that you want to be with and next to nothing of the decorations and none of the stress... and you only get a few presents that you actually wanted. No yelling at me for being overwhelmed and disappointed by all the stuff I didn't want. No guilt tripping for a week after Christmas.
Yeah, Christmas and getting presents became traumatic, repeatedly.
Do less, get more out of it!
Love your last line!
Exactly. Christmas day is for my partner and I, no one else. I'll message my sister and a couple friends, but other than that we just spend the day together as the two of us. We'll bake cookies or something, make hot cocoa and watch a movie. My decorations are a string of snowflake lights clothespinned to the blinds and a couple of those gel window decorations.
Dogs are always, always baby. So are cats
true, my cats are over 7 years old and they're still and will always be my teeny tiny sweet little babies
More like toddlers. They're lovable menaces.
Babies sleep a lot more and are less able to get underfoot.
@@charlespentrose7834 Calling them toddlers doesn't have the same ring to it though 😆
@@only.in.silence Facts
I never really leaned into the "report back to Santa" part, just a little jackass elf wreaking havoc for fun LOL I can see those two things causing conflict
You can do pajama day with reading books out loud instead of tv or with a radio play. I loved them when I was a child.
In Denmark we don't have a elf on the shelf, but each school class usually has a traveling elf (which is very naughty) and then the elf has a diary where you write about the elf's adventures for the night.
So it's not based on the childs behavior, but it's a little game for when you wake up to see what the elf has done.
In my childhood, I remember the elf taking over the dogs basket, writing Merry Christmas on the mirror, eating all the chocolate (probably my mother's idea that one to handle the surplus of treats in the holiday season 🤣)
I loved this tradition, as it was a real bonding and collective experience esp with other kids in school.
I remember when the elf on a shelf thing was gaining internet traction. I was confused cause it seemed like an actual tradition people knew about. Then I looked it up and found out it was just something fabricated out of a Christmas book someone wrote in like the early 2000s (somewhere around there? ) and was like, nope nope nope. It never sounded like an appealing idea to me either and it really smacks of early influencers stepping into heavy corporation advertising. I find it such a strange thing to stress over.
I'm so surprised by the popularity of elf on the shelf because I had never heard of it growing up - even though the book was published in 2005 which would be the perfect time for my younger brother - but it seems the opposite of every parenting advice I have heard that is backed by modern data. Very weird to me
*Edited because I forget coding formats affect some text on TH-cam and I didn't mean to strike through
Your videos are like little pops of sunshine on a gloomy day! (And yes, I did watch to the end, Claudia's singing was pitch-perfect!)
Our Elves are Kindness elves. They do sillier things whenever they see kindness.
Elf on the Shelf wasn’t a “Thing” when I was a kid (although it was around) but my mom did something fundamentally similar called “Super Elf” which was basically where if we weren’t behaving she would tell us she was going to call “Super Elf” who would tell Santa not to make us presents, and that we would get coal. Weirdly enough, this did not get us to behave. Instead, it would get my brother and I all worked up crying and begging our mom not to call “Super Elf.” I don’t remember what we were doing wrong, but I do remember the crying. Finding out Santa was my parents was a different sort of betrayal because of the added emotional manipulation that went on there.
Anyways, if Life decides that kids are in my path, Santa is just going to be a myth, and not a tool to get them to behave. 😅
I also get louder and more over the top when I'm nervous. I get really talkative and friendly and over sharing-y. I think it may be an ADHD thing??
Such wisdom in advising safety first and the right to personal privacy.
Floof!! 😍😍😍 Bertie is clearly past the legal level of cute ❤
How do you envisage the interaction of not labelling kids + disability rights/activism/positivity?
I’m autistic and was diagnosed over a decade ago as a young teenager, but it took me *years* to get over a feeling like I shouldn’t be labelling myself, that using the label would just restrict me by shaping my self-perception and that of others. I did not grow up in an environment that said labels are bad, I just got fed the idea that maybe labelling yourself autistic might not be a good thing by doctors involved in the diagnosis pathway. But when I think on it, their reasoning sounds a lot like the Montessori idea (from my limited understanding). That was the thing that screwed me over - because the same thing that gave me relief that there was a reason I was weird, I was not alone, and I was not a bad person for struggling, also made me feel shameful and guilty for putting myself in a box, restricting my self-perception etc. I worry slightly that a refusal to put labels on kids can be enabling to normative societal pressures - eg not labelling a kid as shy becoming a refusal to acknowledge an aspect of legitimate personality, becoming an unspoken pressure to not *be* shy. Or substitute any label there that you want.
I can also see your reasoning for avoiding labelling kids, and it’s a tough balance. Any ideas?
You two are so lovely together! Absolutely heartwarming!
I believe the words out of my mouth the first time I saw this thing was: "What in the post-9/11 surveillance state is going on here? For children???!!"
My children are 9, 7 and 3 months. This year is the first year we're doing Elf on a shelf, but we won't be doing the 'I'm watching you' side of things. We will just do innocent but silly things. Like put it in the baby's nappy caddy with a clean nappy on it's head, or make it look like it's playing on a games console. My 9 year old won't care but my 7 year old will find it funny.
Just a little bit of Christmas fun and if the kids want to play with it they can, if they get fed up half way through December it doesn't matter. All we're trying to achieve is making the kids laugh.
The elf on a shelf is so creepy
Apparently the 'naughty' behaviour that the elf doesn't know how to behave and children need to show him how to be 'good'.
Personally I'm not a fan of elf on the shelf. I think families have already a lot to think about during the festive season and it's just one more thing ❤
Bertie is a natural performer, I vote to give him more time on the screen!
i love this!! as a lesbian myself its nice to see people just being people :D
Elf on a Shelf sounds like George Orwell's Santa!
Childhood friends are often more like siblings. You may have very different personalities, but you grew up in a similar environment.
I once put Elf on the shelf in the toaster, and Gran didn't take him out before making toast so the elf got a burnt bum 😂
We didn't have the regular elf though. I made the damn thing and had to re make Eddies backside 😂
Oh no! 😂
A child who grows up never seeing their face sounds like a sick plot for a psychological thriller though
I've never been this early for ANYTHING in my life lol
Yes! I believe in multiple soul mates. We all charge throughout time and we have friends and meet new people... It just makes sense.
….. I literally made blueberry muffins and stacked the dishwasher during this video 😂😂😂
I always enjoy Jessica’s conversations with Claudia! ❤ Bertie is adorable and Elf on the Shelf is just entertainment to me (I’ve seen those pictures of Elf on the Shelf getting into trouble or getting into danger). 😊 This doll didn’t exist when I was a kid though.
I thought elf on a shelf was just a cute saying or decoration… i didn’t know there was a whole game attached to it
There's even a parody Jewish version called Mensch on a Bench. There are pages online with ideas for what to do if you're a parent who's forgetful and didn't move the elf. A friend collects photos of naughty Elf on the Shelf poses he has seen online.
I share that sentiment about childhood friends and I agree, it is kind of difficult to describe. Like, it's the first cohort you are a part of, heck it might be the only cohort you find yourself in but there is a horizontal... innocence (?) to those within it. I never put high expectations or pressure on my peers, nor felt any. It was mainly support, sometimes friction, but mainly curiosity all around. We all felt the pressures and expectations from the rest of the world and we were all just figuring it out together you know?
It might very well be the first time a person registers a sense of camaraderie, and that's a very powerful feeling. I mean, in times of conflict it causes soldiers to re-enlist rather than rotate back into civilian life.
And like all powerful feelings or passions, be prepared for those who will capitalize on that and twist it against you
The whole concept of “are you good” or “are you naughty” is very vague. Especially whenever you watch or read a Christmas story and there is a child who is “naughty”, it’s normal just kids being kids. Like a kid running with scissors (a kid wouldn’t know that’s dangerous, unless they are told that information, but in those stories, that kid is naughty). Also the concept of that naughty kids get coal, is weird when you learn that coal used to be very helpful by warming the house, back before electric heat was common in most homes. Also there are pizza restaurants, where I live that still use coal-burning fires, to make the pizzas. Also I’ve never heard of an actual child who actually got coal for Christmas. The “worst” presents, I’ve heard of, was getting underwear or socks, but sometimes that’s all the parents could afford and they are practically items.
I really wish we got rid of the “good kid” vs “naughty kid” stereotype.
unintentional jumpscare warning ⚠️ ,, very loud noise 5:44
Bertie is so cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute!
The fact that you feel the need to remove a sticker to be mindful of others around you or to feel safe is beyond heartbreaking! I hate that for the longest time it only felt like we were progressing as a society, but the past few years have been a just downright scary regression. I always have said that you should absolutely never tone yourself down in any setting, always be you 110%. Stay safe and stay lovely! 🤍🤍
CLAUDIA PLEASE I NEED TO KNOW WHERE YOU GOT THAT STICKER 🤩🤩🤩
Jessica says hello and I always say Hello back. ❤️❤️❤️
Every time Jessica leans away from the dog it just screams 'Ew please don't lick me" energy and I vibe with that SO hard
Biophillia - “the theory we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to nature”, I believe in it!
my family loved ours, it made us food and helped decorate and got up to mischief occasionally, like when they tied santa to the ceiling we had a whole backstory by the end, one elf married my barbie and had 3 kids, his sister also came and then their wacky cousin so by the end there was 6 elves and a barbie visiting 😂 chaos, but i woke up every morning excited
That's cute!
Elf on the Shelf is “secular”, but the book points towards Christianity. The layers involved gives me the ick. And I hate how TH-cam families normalized the elf bringing daily presents.
I did elf on the shelf, mostly though just hiding it and then in the morning you find wherever the elf hid. Lot less stressful for parents and children!
In my friend group, we call ourselves the Golden Girls, after the tv show. We are in our mid 50’s, but have been friends since we were 10. We have a group chat, and try to have dinner with all of us together at least once or twice a year. If something big comes up in our lives or just feeling bad, the others are there on the chat for support.
I love how when you said you didn't participate in Elf On The Shelf growing up it sounded like it was because its an American thing, and not because it was only invented in like 2005 (wow thought it was newer than that tbh).
That's still almost 20 years ago tho
@@gloomyscribblesyeah but that's less than our lifetimes where Christmas is like humanity-long lol
Our elf is a good kind elf. Who does kind deeds. She don't report back to santa. But encourages good behaviour..
Omg I loved The Snowman as a little kid!! I feel like I should rewatch it now as an adult.
Just the bit about elf on the shelf was enough for me! I'm with you all the way on that one Jessica
24:37 My wife also keeps my Dad’s attention so I don’t get aggravated with him. (It is very much appreciated.)
When my ex and I were still together and my uncle was still alive, hubby served an invaluable function at family gatherings because he and my cranky, crotchety, cantankerous uncle bonded over a few topics such as nature. So if Uncle Max got grouchy, hubby could be dispatched to go talk plants or birds and calm him down.
@ Yes! It’s nice when someone without a history can step in to distract. My wife is genuinely amused by most things my Dad says, me not so much. Don’t get me wrong, I love my Dad, I like my Dad, but in social situations he can be so extra.
As a child I woke up on Christmas Day to a stocking full of cinders because I was, admittedly, a brat that year. I can’t tell you the devastation that comes when you realise that Santa hates you. I did eventually get some gifts on Boxing Day but can’t recommend the cinders route for children.
22:20 I really hope that when I grow up me and my wife will have this much fun with eachother
Best Christmas movie is "A Christmas Story" it reminds me of my Dad, he loved it. Love💜!
I've never seen it, as it doesn't sound like my thing, but a cousin who had once sent our uncle on a rant inadvertently. He was waxing nostalgic for some scarce childhood fun and happened to mention a BB gun he'd had. "You could put somebody's eye out with that!" my cousin cheerfully piped up, quoting the movie (having not seen the movie, I may not have quoted it quite right but you know the line). He didn't know it was just a movie quote and started ranting about how if you're carefully taught how to use it and how not to use it, that would never happen, etc. etc. etc. We all freaked out a bit because this was an uncle who got worked up easily, and it had been going so nicely until her innocent mistake. Thank goodness my ex and I were still together at the time, so I could get him to engage my uncle on one of his few good subjects to turn the tide. But that for me is my inextricably-connected instant flashback when anyone mentions _A Christmas Story_ .
I clicked on this video because I'm a parent who hates elf on the shelf.
It's ok, I like trees too ❤😂 Currently obsessed with an insta account that shows really, really miniature bonsais; like a couple-centimeters-across-pot size bonsais?? The big ones are great too lol
I'm bad at staying in touch with people, but I open myself for all of my friends throughout my entire life to find me and talk to me anytime they think of me. Every once in a while, they do, or I do, and we catch up. It's quite comforting, honestly. I haven't spoke to one of my absolute best friends in life for almost a year now, but I know someday she's going to contact me and invite me to hang out for breakfast or tea at her house. I still have unlit candles we made together in her studio some years ago. They're precious to me. Of course, I'm shy, but I do sometimes gain the courage to say hi to people in my past. You know you have good friends when that time distance feels like just yesterday and you can talk like no time has passed.
Really, truly, friendship with me is easy to jump into, but hard to get out of. I love all my friends to bits. I've also just been lucky as a trans woman to grow up around good people. I like to think I helped foster that environment around me.
My parents never did the "Santa brigs presents to good children" thing and neither did I. I never understood why people think it's a good idea, it sounds like a lot of stress for everyone involved. So of course Elf on the shelf sounds like a horror story to me.
I've heard a lot of people telling that they hate the idea of Santa because they where basically blackmailed to obedience. It's so far from my experience of a benevolent entity giving gifts for no reason! So I went with that approach for my kids too. The oldest one knows the true and is very happy to keep the secret for his younger sibling, so I think we're doing great.
25:35 Luckily for me I'm not having to pack the dishwasher, because my sisters-in-law did that last night before they left! My first time ever to have everyone over at the holidays, and it went quite well (apart from my sweet namesake niece accidentally putting the ham in the freezer Wednesday night instead of the refrigerator - thank goodness someone had given my younger sister-in-law two turkeys!).
4:35 I completley understand where you're coming from, however I do think that it can be quite different for trans people. Claudia as much as it sucks that people assume that you're straight, at least people are going to use the right name and pronouns for you
❤
On the elf in the shelf thing, my parents didn’t do that but we did have this tradition called Minion November. My mom and dad had a collection of minion toys, and every morning they would place them around the house. They would be washing dishes, or playing with my mom’s clarinet. It was great and we loved it.
I HAVE been subscribed for years! 😂 but I’m also interested in the topic!!❤💚❤️
Same!
Yay, Montessori families! We don’t label either, absolutely no elf on the shelf. We’re also not doing Santa/Father Christmas and celebrate Winter Solstice instead of Christmas (because of our other beliefs).
Anyone else not doing Santa? Kids are 4 and 2, so not sure how it will play out yet.
Elf on the Shelf didn't exist before 2005. Some new traditions are not very good.. this is one of them.
You know why they lick faces? It's because that is how they pet you. This is how they let you know they love you. Their paws are not hands:) in packs too, it is a sign of respect and calm to let the other know they mean no harm.
My nephews LOVED elf on a shelf. They asked for them for Christmas several years back and my brother went all out to make it fun for them. They're not just surveillance cameras that sit on a shelf. They get up to mischief in the middle of the night and make holiday themed messes or *give gifts to the kids and the nephews love going on a little scavenger hunt in the morning to find where they've moved to. In my opinion the elf on a shelf isn't really any different from the notion that Santa "sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake."
I understand people's criticisms of the toy but I think we as adults need to understand that kids don't think about things the way we do, and if done right the elf on the shelf is a fun holiday experience for younger kids, that creates fun memories.
I love the day after Thanksgiving so I can go FULL CHRISTMAS
My daughter hates dolls, and for many years elf on the shelf was no different. As she got older she wanted to get a couple of them, so we did. We made it more about working together to create funny/silly scenarios for the elf for an annual christmas photo, rather than about watching kids behaviour. And for the past few years we've ended up using one of the elves as a christmas tree topper.
that's sweet
Wow... never in my life, even as a little kid, have I ever had a stranger (or anyone for that matter) ask if I've been good or bad around Christmas, or any other time. I didn't know that was a thing. Of course my family kept up the whole "kids with good behavior get presents and bad behavior gets nothing", but it was always just my mom n step dad saying it. And of course they stopped by the time I was 7 and knew there was no Santa.
Such sweet observations, lovely family