Ua Zoo Kom Dim Lub Tsev Laus. 3/23/2024
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 มี.ค. 2024
- Ua Zoo Kom Dim Lub Tsev Laus.
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We should thank the siblings who sacrifice their careers to care for our parents. The desire is to live with our loved ones, but the reality is that nursing home is unavoidable. Unless you make over 6 figures, it's a two person salary world.
Finally, a woman who knows and realizes how much a son loves his mom and gives him the hardest choice to choose between his wife and his own mother…sad but true…!
You are doing the right thing. You doing it for the “Love of God”. He will bless you with good health and longevity…👍🤠!
Compare taking of a child to a disabled adult is unmatched. Parents if you love your children, please don't let them take care of you when you are unable to take care of yourself. Nursing home is the best option for you. Your children will thank you and come to see you more often.
Bless you, sister, for caring for your mom and mother-in-law. It's a tough job, and only those with the biggest heart could do it. Let the haters hate, but your kindness will be bless.
Everyone should know that it’s not easy to care for a senior. Be proud of the one who can, but don’t criticize the one who can’t. Be supportive to both parties. The traditional Hmong seniors want to stay home but they don’t understand it’s very hard on some people. Not everyone can do this kind of job. Some seniors are willing to go to senior or nursing home, the ones they are not willing will make their family feel insulted and shame to the Hmong community.
We all just need to understand that is not easy…..
This is a very sad topic. Thank you for sharing sister.
Your brother should’ve reported his wife’s affair to the insurance company she and her boyfriend work for.
Your mom and mother-in-law will bless you a thousand times for taking care of them. God bless you and your family.
Caring for the elderly is now the dilemma for many families these days. It’s so sad.
Koj ua yog lawm os ua zoo rau tejlaus kom tag lawv txojsia hawjlwm muaj tus mam mus nrhiav yeej tsis lig os mog thov Vajtswv foom koobmoov rau koj txoj kev zoo uas ua rau yus niam yus txiv. Niam thiab txiv ces tam lub ntuj rau yus os
I am glad you are doing the right thing to take of your mom until the day she passed away and the same thing for your mil too. Bless you for what you do and may you have a long healthy life.
May God bless you os sister aw.❤
You do right way
I'm have a big heart, but not everyone is blessed with that kind of wisdom. Just keep doing you without dragging yourself down from what others are doing.
You and your husband are good people. You will be blessed.
You have such a beautiful soul!!
Peb ua neej nyob sawv daws yeej yuav txawj laus es thov peb hlub2 cov laus thiab mog yog luag ua rau yus niam los mob2 yus siab es txhob ua rau luag niam thiab os lawv tsam yog yus ne yus puas tu siab mas txhob siab phem2 rau cov laus npam sai2 laiv ..
Nyob zoo os
👏👏👏 so proud of you sister. You are a true blessing 😀
Bless your heart sister.
I agree ☝️ 💯
Sister, kuv thov qhuas koj. Koj yog ib tug neeg siab loj siab zoo heev. We need lots of good women like you🙏🙏🙏
Tu siab kawg 😢
Sad story sis 😂😂😂😂
Sister ua li koj ua zoo kawg lawm os, cov tub nyab tiam no rau tom ntej ces peb txhob tu siab txhob tos lawv lub tsev nyob lawm os mog, ab tsib tos nyob tsev laus lawm xwb nawv😢😢
At least now there is a nyab that understand how men feels.
😭❤❤❤
Tu siab kaug li os
Yog lawm o zoo siab heev ua zoo ces yus yeej tau zoo xwb o niam laus aw
I totally understand. I quit my job and came to stay with my mom after my dad passed. For 11 years only half of a year before my mom passed away, did I really had to have hands on to help my mom. No regrets in quitting a job for my parents ❤❤
I did the same thing when my mom had her stroke twice. None of my siblings and dad was willing to take care of my mom. Even my brother said to put my mom in a nursing home. Hope one day his kids put him in a nursing home. I give you prop sister, our moms are very lucky to have us.
Koom koj thiab nawb
Yog koj cov nus coj tau lub siab dav li koj mas ntshe koj yuav tau 1 tsev neeg zoo heev.
Your mother was probably better cared for by the nursing home than any of her children. There’s staffs 24/7 to care for her.
We have to normalize that going into nursing homes is ok. Everyone has bills and everyone has obligations. I know myself I would never burden my children if one day I am unable to care for myself. We live in a different age and my will states this. Take care of yourself, prepare for yourself and normalize that preparing for yourself is OK!
I agreed with you but these are our older parents who still have the mindset that their kids are obligated to take care of them when they are old. But I’m sure after our parents’ generation, we are OK to live in the nursing home.
@lisvaj yeah, let’s wait until it’s your time. You talk all big, but wait until no one brings you Hmong food and you crave for it, your bed, and your home. 🤪
@@missysmart8620 agree with you
@@microbiologist50I feel sorry for your kids if that’s your expectation. You must live in a narrow minded town with no Hmong nursing homes. I mentioned we have to in our day and age, not the OG’s! Did you even listen to this story, she got a place for her mom, her mom didn’t live with her.
@@lisvaj7375 yes, I live in a state where there’s no Hmong people and not everyone is blessed like you so you can’t expect all parents to have the same mindset as you. Keep that in mind. I didn’t even want to stay at the hospital for one day after giving birth or be sick and have to stay at the hospital, just imagine living at the nursing home. Have you even visit nursing homes? It’s very sad life. It doesn’t matter if it’s a Hmong or non Hmong nursing home; nursing home is a nursing home.
Yes, our children have their own lives and have bills to pay, but so do we as parents. There are parents who give up their careers to take care of their children so why can’t the children do the same? Back in the days, children or PCA do not get paid for caring for their parents, but now they do so there’s no excuses.
Proud of you for what you are able to do for your mother and mil! We can't expect it from everyone. Even the brothers were not able. But I don't understand why it is always the nyabs fault. Because they don't wipe/change the in-laws. The sons should be able to do it as well since love is being claimed.
You, as a daughter, should and be able to take ur mom and dad in too don't always think it is only the brothers.
What are we all doing?? It’s almost midnight here on the West Coast! 😂
There's a snow storm here in MN so we are staying put inside 😅
Ua zoo ces tau zoo xwb os mog mi sister koj ua tau zoo heev li os
Cog nyab phem yuav tau phem remember nawb!
When it's our turn to go to senior care we have to accept it and follow through. We must invest in retirement and put our kids to success. Don't say oh it's going to be your turn. When it's our turn we have to be smart about it.
Don’t put all your hopes that your kids will take care of you like how you took care of your mil and mom. This generation is different from your generation. You also cannot compare a baby or toddler to an adult. An adult is harder and bigger to take care of. We have to have an open mind when it comes to nursing home.
Yog tshaj li os ,niaj nub no kuv nim ntshai2 tsam kuv tau mus nyob tsev laus li thiab os!
Hmoob o hmoob aw cas
tsis pauv lis o ..nej mas tseem nyob rau tiam Suav tuas ntaj xwb o hmoob .
Tu siab tshaj os. Ntshe ib hnub twg ces peb txhua tus niam yuav tau mus tsev laus os mog. Mus los kav liam es ua ib siab.😢☹️
Safety
Cov nws thiab cov nyab xav txeeb ntsej muag ces zoo li os.
Why do our Hmong sisters keep thinking it’s the brother’s and sil’s responsibility to take care of the harness only?? Your parents took care of u the same as they took care of your brothers. U are too entitled and have the same responsibility to take care of your parents. I’m glad you were able to take care of your mom.
And yet when her mother passed, the brothers felt entitled to all their mother's money. Why??? Because this is currently still the Hmong way.
Pros to you!
You have a really big heart, I give you prop for that. I'm 51 yrs old, and I'm sure I can't do what you do regardless if it's my parents or my husband's parents. Therefore, I'm prepping myself for nursing home when i get there myself.
Koj ua yog lawm nawb tus me muam es thov qhuas koj os xav kom txhua tus nyab hmoob txawj xav li koj xwb lauj
ชอบๆๆ
Kav liam os tus niam laus aw, sawv daws yeej taug ib txoj kev, lawv ua li ntawv lawv yuav tau li ntawv os mog.
Cov nyab thiab cov nus tsis paub xav es thiaj hais lis xwb os. Tiag2 mam ntshev lawv tseem yuav ua koj tsaug os tus vivncau aw.
Namzeemxeethao
Cov nyiag nus thiab cov nyiag nyab tsis txawj xav ces thiaj xav li ko rau koj tus ua muam xwb. Nkim zog koj niam yug.
Koj niam tej nyiaj ces kuv ces kuv yeej tsis muab 1cent rau li ho
I'm so proud of u to get your mom out of the nursing home. Now even the daughter have the right to care for our parents. I see alot the now the daughter in law dont care about the husband parent anymore but they loved there own parents. That's not right without the husband parent there husband don't exist they need to realize that.
Hais rau peb cov niam thiab txiv tsis txhob ntshai lub tsev laus mawb mog hais rau nej peb cov menyuam ua hlub peb thiab so peb quav peb zi ce yog cov nyob tom tsev laus xwb nawb mog es tsis txhob ntshai thaum peb pab tsis tau peb tus kheej lawm ce kav tsij mus myob tsev laus es tej menyuam thiaj tsis ntxub txhub yu nawb mog
Kv yeej xav li kj cov nyab thiab nus. Yg g muaj kj niam mas lav loos kj yeej g yuav kj niam pog los tu ib zaug li nawb.
Tau tus es txawj xav ces txawj hlub tej laus tau tus tsis txawj xav ces lawv hlub lawv cov xwb os. It goes both ways if you want your husband to love your side then you need to love your husband's side because your husband want you to love his side too. Put yourself in his shoes n put yourself in the elders shoes. Ask yourself how would you feel if you get treated like that. You will be just as hurt as they will be too.
10leej me nyuam hlub tsi Tau niam thiab txiv .niam thiab txiv 2 leeg xb hlub Tau 10 leej me nyuam
Yog kawg ua zoo tau zoo
I work 3rd shift.
Lawv lam tsis nyiam yus niam yus txiv xwb yog lawv niam lawv txiv mas lawv yeej tsis pom qia neeg thiab tsw quav li os nyias ua rau nyias ev xwb .
😢😢😢
Tej nyab tej nus lawv twb yug tau menyuam thiab lawv yeej yuav ntsib tej laus txoj kev txomnyem li lawv ua rau yus niam yus txiv tib yam nkaus
Yom cas tej laus mas nim laus zus lawm os, cov tub nyab uas lawv cia cia siab rau mas nim niaj hnub hawv lub tsev laus rau xwb. Xav los mas tu siab kawg thiab hlub lawv kawg los yus ua tsis tau zaj twg.
Lawv aw! Tsis txhob tos2 tej tub tej nyab tu yus thaum yus laus es tsus taus lawm lawv thiaj tsis dhuav yus os. Ua ib siab mus nyob tsev laus es tsuav lawv kam xa zaub xa mov yam uas yus nyiam noj tuaj rau tus xwb mog. Yog yuav vam tub nyab so yus quav xwb ces lawv kawh dhuav yus os. Tuam no tub nyab tsis khoom tus yus lawm es thov kom co. Laus to taub cov nkauj cov muam los tos taub thiab nawb.
The audacity to ask for inheritance money. We made sure our parents didn't get to go to a nursing home and I expect the same for my children, if they want an inheritance. Good for you sister for stepping up to take care of your mom. May all the good karma come your way.
Koj coj koj niam tim tsev laus los xwb . Thaum koj cov nus lawv coj koj niam mus tim tsev laus ces koj niam cov nyiaj yeej tas hnub ntawd lawm es koj niam tseem muaj nyiaj li cas rau lawv nas vwm pob.
It is not easy. You would really have to quit your job to help the seniors. But the inflation is high. How can we live and take care of the elders?
I have been working at nursing home . I can't believe what I have seen there. I quited because I can't afford to see theirs suffer. Some of the nurses so impatient. The day I quit my manager said one day you would be in here. The response to that I would have died before then.
No worries, girl. Kuv ces hais tias tsis muaj nus lawm no tabsis yog tias muaj los yuav zoo ib yam nkaus koj thiab. Yus lub siab phem tsis npaum li lawv es thov kom lub ntuj muaj qhov muag ho txhob cia yus rau leej twg tau tu yus xwb tiag. Kuv li ces qhov kuv ntshaw ces yog tsis txhob muaj mob es cia kuv ua taus rau kuv noj txog kuv lub sijhawm rov qab ces cia li sawv tsees mus xwb.
Will see when your step sister old enough
Just imagine living in a place where you do not understand the language, cannot eat their food, and the care is bare minimum because lack of staff. Our younger generation may be okay with being put in a nursing home, but our parents are not.
Ib zaug es kj muab li 4- 5 puas xwb yog yus niam yus txiv lawv hlub yus ua luaj es yuav muab li ob phav peb Phab cob muab tsawg ua luaj li es tseem ghia thiab viv ncaus aws.
Koj ua tau zoo ces zoo xwb tus twg ua tsis tau li koj los txhob cem tias lawv phem xwb
Koj thiab koj Tus txiv neej ua yog thiab muaj kev hlub 2 tug laus ncaj ncees txawj lawv yuav hais li cas los lawv hais lawv koj Tus txiv neb yog ua qhov zoo xwb
It’s not the Nyab’s fault at all. The nyabs are not obligated to care for the in laws. The nyabs are a part of the family due to marriage. The in laws did not give brith to the nyabs, so they do not need to take care of the in laws. If they are your parents, then you better take care of them. It’s non of the nyabs responsibility.
Peb ua neej nyob nej cov nyab thiab cov nws hais lus li no nej hais sab nej dhau rau nej tus muam yog muab rau tsev laus es tsev laus nej niam cov nyiaj laus noj tag es cas nej ho tsis hais mekas es nej tus tu no nej ho tsib leej twg tu leej twg yuav tsum yuav cov nyiaj ntawd thiaj ncaj ncees nej cov nws ua tsis yog lawm
Sister, your story is truly sad but when you chose caring both of your moms yourself and then wish bad things to the other in your family members is wrong. If you are not happy then why do it? You have nothing to gain here.
I can take care kids but not elderly im sorry but when we old we stinks even i dont even like my old smell.
Muaj ib leejniam nws tham tias nws tus nyab sau nws cov khaubncaws kom nws mus nyob tsev laus es nws tsis kam mus nws quaj2 ces nws tus me tub xeebntxwv muaj 4 xyoo nria2 nws hais rau nws pog tias, kuv pog. Kuv hlub koj.Koj txhob quaj2 kav tsij mus nyob tawm mus txhob nrog niag pojdab ntawv nyob lwm hnub kuv loj kuv yuav nyab kuv mam qhia kuv tus nyab ua phem li nws ua rau koj ib hnub thaum nws laus2 li koj no ces nws nria2 nws thiaj ua ib siab mus nyob tsev laus lawm
Girl who cares about what ur sister in law says, I think she is jealous of you because you are going to get all the blessings.
Your brothers and nyab are so ungrateful to talked to you like that. They should have thank you. And honestly I believe the monthly money your mom received should have been yours since you sacrificed your job to take cared of your mom. You did something not many children can do for their old aged parents.
Ntsheeg li kj hais os
As a wife, you SHOULD NOT make your husband choose between you and his parent/s!!! Especially if you fcked up and is embarrassed about it!! Luag cem yus rau qhov zoo xwb na!!! Cov niag tsov tom ua tsis taug txiv ces, pojniam kawg tsuj tuag nti li ntawv xwb tiag!!! Pojniam muaj coob muaj ntau! Tug twg tsis zoo, nrauj pov tseg kiag yeej muaj lwm tus na! You have NO RIGHT to blame others, especially the elders, for YOUR shortcomings!!! Nej niag nug ruam Taub haus loj tiag tiag! Tsis yuav nej niam los yuav mag nrauj, yuav nej niam los yuav mag nrauj! Xum yuav niam muab niag pog meb cab laim pov tseg zoo dua!!! 😂😂😂
I think this is FALSE advertisement! Back in Laos, there’s NO nursing homes. But modern days there is….so you cannot compare back then to now. We have to understand that whatever works for your situation at the time, then it is! Kudos if you could take off work to help elders but maybe some ppl can’t bcuz they cannot survive with one income. If you take care of your elders but someday your kids don’t take care of you, will you guilt them? That’s not a healthy situation to put guilt on others. BEST solution to this situation is….everybody better be prepare for nursing home bcuz that’s the NEW NORM!! And don’t guilt others to stress with you, it’s not healthy for everyone. Welcome to the new generation!!
What goes around will come around!! Karma will get them in their old age, sister!!! They will end up in a nursing home like how they wanted your mom to end up in!!!
Sister you do a very good job with your ma good will bless you and your husband YOUR NYAB AND BROTHER ARE WRONG if your brother and nyab worry about they face look BADthem they should do good for them self to cover they own face
hahaha kharma for being so cocky about ur parents n ur family hahahaha
Koj txhob hais lus seev ntev2 mas koj seev ntev dhau lawm hais li niam neej vam mab vaj thiab nancy yang los yog niam vam choj jenny vang xwb
Best story ❤❤❤❤
I don’t like the entitlement. Most (or in this case of the story) only takes $200-300 and leave the rest for the parent when the cost would be more out of their own pocket. Where is the support from the other siblings? Siblings should be grateful she took the burden from them!
Lady, you are educated and a Teacher. I don't understand why you tell this story. You don't even have the specific purpose, no climate, no conflict. Everything is silo broad and general of typical Hmong families loves and struggles. It's also so typical of self praised. You sound so loving for your mother but at the end you couldn't even bring her to your home. You bought another house just to shelter your mother and mother in law, you designed this second house to be financed by both mothers. You also claim to care both of them 24 hours yet how did you do that when you are working full-time as teacher. You didn't want both mothers to smell your own home. Placing your mother in assisted living facilities where there are paid staffs 24 hours a day and Placing your mother in a separate home is the same. You sound and lecture everyone to place parents in the home, yet you yourself can't even do that. I would believe you and your love better if you actually had your mother in your own home, not another home. You are a teacher and should know better than in our times most of us will prefer to live in assisted living facilities as most Americans. Hmong people now also own and operate assisted living facilities, so it's not so bad. In a sense, your second home bought to house your mother and mother in law is considered a small assisted living facilities. You benefit financially for caring both mothers in the second home.
I can see your point of view! It appears to me what she did benefits both party here. The thing to take away is the happiness of the elders. I hope they were happy while being cared by her.
@@px2824 Hmong parents seem to be happy to have the sense that they are being cared by their children. However, children are busy and not trained to care for them. If you can find a good assisted living facility, that can be much better and you can still do the daily visit and bring Hmong food
I love my parents. I am middle child, my mom passed a way holding my hands. As always I missed my parents 😂. I hope you do same things. God bless 🙌
Ab sim neej no cas mloog tej neej neeg no mas txoj kev Laus cas yuav tu 2 siab ua Luaj Li os niam ntsuab teev aw zoo Li Lub hnub es qaij zuj zus mus rau sab npoo ntuj Lm tiag mloog ces tu 2 siab niam xav tias uv tiag 2 Los kua muag yuav poob tiag 2 uv g taus Li os xav ces hlub tej me tub nyab puas rau tej me xeeb ntxwv kg Li os !
cov niag nyab thiab nus ces cuag li tsi txawj laus li os
Npam ib leeg xwb. The cheating daughter in law.
Lady..don't let those pathetic siblings bother you..truly selfish