Writing a book is really the next frontier for Seagal, because his self-insert character isn't held back by his meager stamina, limp wrists, and bloated gut like it would if he played them on film.
This won't be a popular comment but when Steven was filming Beyond the Law in NYC, he would always come into the Panera I was working at back then when I was in college, even if I was just making bread bowls, he always went out of his way to say good morning and ask how school was going just because I rang him up once.
Seagal's face is like the early ps2 era game graphics, where they figured out how to get the mouth to move but couldn't get the face textures to change expression.
In this particular reading I really enjoyed Felix's "whenever I jack off I think... my grandfather did this." But tactically wide was pretty fucking good.
When I first saw an ad for that reality show where Seagal was a cop or whatever I genuinely thought it was a parody starring WIll Sasso as his ersatz Seagal from MadTV.
It's a common name for Navajos, not really any other tribe. And Segall never specified what tribe he was talking about, but he heavily implied that the novel takes place in Southern Arizona along the border. Navajos live in northern arizona nowhere near the Mexican border. Coincidentally, that is also where all the wolves live in arizona. There are basically zero wolves in the southern part of the state, besides a few that have been reintroduced. The whole book is just a mismatch of stuff that Segall heard in passing over the past few decades. It's obvious that he didn't even do a single cursory google search as far as "research" goes.
John Gode... Goad is much stupider I'm surprised he didn't go with that. Honestly WTF? You're making up a name... you have infinite choices... and you settle with John "Nantan" Gode???
Its hard for me not tp be grateful for the lefts ability just to be conversatiobally funny. Could you imafine being on the right where even the comedy has to obey a certain codified level of structure - no wonder they commit rage vased crimes - even their relaxed time is fascist. When im in charge, the reeducation camps will start with mandatory listening to this episode.
That's what it is for me, too. I get the racism, misogyny and religious extermism, but forming your entire existence around something that just fundamentally lacks all humor is a total mystery to me.
This book is dedicated to the Native American victims of Genocide…and the paramilitary settler Rangers who committed the worst atrocities against them
Duhn-duhn
Womp womp
Litteraly the only group that managed to treat natives worse than the United States Cavalry
@@kuroi_1153 cringe
@@majikss don’t give a fuck
RIP Virgil. We all miss hearing one sardonic comment every 35 minutes. Poor Felix had to increase his vape intake tenfold to fill the void
I almost died of laughter the first time I heard the “some people, and many snakes” line, classic shit
Dedicating a book to both the rangers and Native Americans is just…. Oh, Steven. You’re such a card!
"Steven Seagal isn't fat, just tactically wide"
100K you got your placket!
Writing a book is really the next frontier for Seagal, because his self-insert character isn't held back by his meager stamina, limp wrists, and bloated gut like it would if he played them on film.
This won't be a popular comment but when Steven was filming Beyond the Law in NYC, he would always come into the Panera I was working at back then when I was in college, even if I was just making bread bowls, he always went out of his way to say good morning and ask how school was going just because I rang him up once.
You wouldn't happen to be a hot, trashy woman, would you? Because that would explain that.
Seagal's face is like the early ps2 era game graphics, where they figured out how to get the mouth to move but couldn't get the face textures to change expression.
Tactically wide
The fat short
Oh my God, you win the comments.
Holy fuck Seagal did a land acknowledgment
Cumtown reviewed the movies, Chapo reviewed the book. The circle is complete!
Feel like I need a brandy and a cigar to listen to this properly.
Did everyone else get the feeling John Gode wasn't just a self-insert, but genuinely how Steven sees himself when he looks in the mirror?
The original Gravy SEAL
Meal Team 6
'the highest level of Aikido is sitting down all the time' brilliant
Hes on Meal Team Six
Nice.
i bust on my stomach
Steven Seagal looks like the South Park animators’ rendition of Seb Gorka
I imagine this is what popular fiction is like in the Shadowrun universe
33:25 Matt goes full joker out of nowhere
Every time he said “WHAT IF…?” In Seagals raspy voice and the scary music, I lost it 😂😂
Had to relisten to this after finishing the 3 pt dollop on Steven Seagal. Way funnier than I remembered.
Same.
Man this was like an audio version of MST3K
I love you for saying this❤
This book is dedicated to the Native Americans. Now, onto the foreword by a modern day Andrew Jackson.
Steven "Labrador Flattener" Seagal, with a nickname like this, you know he's a dangerous man
Pmsl
30% of this book's word count was the phrase "what if"
What if I was a member of sparkly kittens and destroyed the shadow wolves?
4:55 just bookmarking the best insult in history
In this particular reading I really enjoyed Felix's "whenever I jack off I think... my grandfather did this."
But tactically wide was pretty fucking good.
Johnny Be Goode, but Henry Be Gaye.
When I first saw an ad for that reality show where Seagal was a cop or whatever I genuinely thought it was a parody starring WIll Sasso as his ersatz Seagal from MadTV.
SIX YEARS AGO
begay is a common surname in indigenous naming schemes.
So I went and listened to Cat Person after this. Felix is dead on.
Steve Sea Gull, Operator, Ninji, Navy Seal Team Six Founder, Protector of the Third Realm, Billy Jack fanboy, and King of the Silver Screen. 🥋
More suggestions for Segal’s titles: Celebrated Pants-Shitter! Undefeated Dog Murderer! Poonani Master!
It's a shame they will probably never make this book into a movie.
real shit
I heard Virgil's voice and then immediately thought: HOW OLD IS THIS... and then checked the date from the corner of the video
If only Virgil had checked how old something was...
@@nickadt LMAO
@@nickadt if only the internet checked receipts.
@@nickadt you know, all of this is bull crap, right?
We heard this...we need part two !
some people...and many snakes
Too much to hope for a “Pearson Fode is….John Goade,” universe. 😭😭😭😭
Sadly, you're probably right.
the aladdin gag is especially funny knowing that the Proud Boys named their little gang after a song from the aladdin broadway musical
A warrior with of the waistline a septupled chin shogun if you will.
I can't be the only one listening to this thinking that the snake connection thing was inspired by Harry Potter? 😂
Damn, did Felix really reference *Bear Stearns Bravo*? That's a deep pull, even for him. Surprised to learn he's into ARGs. (It's at about 41:20)
8:14 Matt screaming "This is LaRouche!!!"
I will pay for the Patreon again if they return to this book.
What if reality was real
For the algorithm
So good, intelligent , fuck bro rogan
Begay is a common native name in Arizona
It's a common name for Navajos, not really any other tribe. And Segall never specified what tribe he was talking about, but he heavily implied that the novel takes place in Southern Arizona along the border. Navajos live in northern arizona nowhere near the Mexican border.
Coincidentally, that is also where all the wolves live in arizona. There are basically zero wolves in the southern part of the state, besides a few that have been reintroduced.
The whole book is just a mismatch of stuff that Segall heard in passing over the past few decades. It's obvious that he didn't even do a single cursory google search as far as "research" goes.
after hearing this i tell everybody within earshot that i now go by "dog flattener".
47min of pure Segal insight
a true scholar warrior
100k!!!
MORE
So how do.you write a book in crayon? Is the whole book in all caps Comic Sans?
The music lol
😂😂😂😂 Best Chapo yet
V*rgil
who is Vargil?
please steven i'm scared for real dude
John Gode... Goad is much stupider I'm surprised he didn't go with that.
Honestly WTF? You're making up a name... you have infinite choices... and you settle with John "Nantan" Gode???
Is this Bernie Sanders? 😂😂
Its hard for me not tp be grateful for the lefts ability just to be conversatiobally funny. Could you imafine being on the right where even the comedy has to obey a certain codified level of structure - no wonder they commit rage vased crimes - even their relaxed time is fascist. When im in charge, the reeducation camps will start with mandatory listening to this episode.
That's what it is for me, too.
I get the racism, misogyny and religious extermism, but forming your entire existence around something that just fundamentally lacks all humor is a total mystery to me.
Have either of you guys ever even met a conservative?
@@Smokey298 yeah. the vast majority were unfunny.
😀
join your local kiwi nanners club
These guys sound like a bunch of danger folks!
35:45
where is virgil texas
I think he's on part 2 of their book review. This is an old episode, but why are you asking?
@@Cussy69_420 i'm specifically referring to how he's completely disappeared from the face of the earth lmao
@@YuriSakazaki yeah he done did some stuff
7:25 aren’t prefaces usually written by the author of the book?
pretty rare in a novel, no?
I think they're riffing on the fact he keeps saying it's fiction then keeps presenting it as non-fiction.
Did they finish the book on Patreon?
Trump number 1