Sex and Intimacy: Part 2 of 2
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ก.ย. 2024
- Do you want sex or do you want intimacy? Or both?
Sometimes our attempts to connect with guys gets thwarted by the confusion between these desires. This can lead to frustration and over time, loneliness.
In part 2 of this 2-part episode, we’re going deeper into intimacy by talking about
✦ How to develop more intimate connections
✦ Why gay men avoid intimacy
✦ How to overcome the fear of intimacy
If you want to increase your capacity for intimacy, this episode is for you. Don’t forget to check out part 1 here:
• Sex and Intimacy: Part...
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Welcome to Gay Men Going Deeper, a TH-cam series where your hosts, Matt Landsiedel and Michael DiIorio talk about all things personal development, mental health and sexuality.
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This is a conscious community for gay men to connect with each other on the journey of healing from shame and becoming more authentic and aligned to their truth. We aim to offer inspiration, support, connection, healing, and a safe space to show up just as you are. Our vision for the members is to learn to feel more comfortable showing up vulnerably so deeper intimacy can be established in our community. We dream of a gay community where everyone can feel more connected to one another in more ways than just superficial and we can feel less lonely and have deeper connections to one another.
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This is a topic men don't want to discuss gay or straight.Thanks for letting us know and how to handle it. Very informative and interesting subject of matter.
Something that I really like about these episodes is how you both are able to put in words how so many of us feel but had no idea that we were feeling that. So many times, while listening to you, I go “Yes! That’s exactly me! How did I not see that before?!”. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
🙏❤️
i can’t even express how grateful i am to have found you both, and this incredible channel. the little 10 year old gay kid that is still very much alive within this 25 year old body, can finally take a deep breathe knowing that he’s not alone. thank you ❤️
Your words truly touch our hearts. We're honored to be a source of support and comfort for you, and we're so glad that you feel a sense of belonging here. Remember, you're never alone, and we're here for you every step of the way. Keep being true to yourself, and thank you for being a part of our community.🏳🌈💞
Matt, you and Michael are an amazing help to listen to, you are both so real, so glad I have found your podcasts. Thank you guys. namaste🙏
Thank you so much for your kind words and support! We’re really glad that our conversations resonate with you. It means the world to us that you’ve found value in what we share. We’ll keep showing up with honesty and realness, and we’re grateful to have you on this journey with us. Namaste!😍
The older I get, the more I realize that I do not know. It's easy to hide from yourself even from inside your own skin. Thank you for sharing yourselves with us. Now I got work to do!
You guys are telling my story before I became more conscious and aware of my authenticity!
In the beginning, I plunged right into the gay scene, not knowing how to navigate myself taking my cues from what was happening around me and thinking that was how to conduct myself all the while feeling a void of discontent, disconnection, unfulfillment, and sexual trauma. Eventually, I learned who I was and that it was OK to not conform in order to "fit in" as long as I was authentic because "fitting in" accomplished nothing other than the experience of what I didn't want and who I really wasn't.
So interesting, as Matt said his first thing he sets for his students/clients is to set their intention, I had written the very same words and deleted the feed back before hearing all the podcast because I thought it may not be appropriate?
How strange is that, well Matt I live by that mantra, I have a long long way to go to 'master' it because I totally agree with you, it is so so powerful. One of my mistakes is not to be specific 'enough' in other words 'detailed' intention?
I am amazed at the results of setting these intentions and how the 'Universe' engineers the scene for it to play out and whether: one; I recognise it, two: I cooperate with it?
I love you guys, thank you...peace namaste🙏
Wow, thank you for sharing this! It’s amazing how aligned your thoughts were with the conversation. Setting specific intentions is truly powerful, and it’s incredible to hear how it’s working for you. It’s a journey for all of us, and we’re honored to be a part of yours. Peace and namaste to you as well!❤🙌
I am forcing myself to sit down and listen to these podcasts all the way through now: not because I don't/didn't find them interesting, but because it's opening up my old wounds that I've never wanted to fully experience. It's tough to hear my story echoed multiple times, especially on a topic like this. I see myself through both of your eyes (Matt and Michael) with many AHA moments. The fact that both of you are so warm and caring, and the fact that you can disucss these topics so openly and candidly, shows YOUR GROWTH AND HEALING as well. Normalizing these topics and issues is so important, especially now when there seems to be so many mixed and confusing/contradictory messages thrown at us in the gay community when it comes to sex and intimacy. You're like a compass that's always pointing north for the sake of your members and viewers. Thank you for being open and vulnerable so people like me can do the same and pass the message along
This is a beautiful comment to leave for us. Thanks Ross 🤗
I totally identify re old wounds
Your videos and your conversations have really helped me out!! It’s help me understand myself, my friend, and the people around me so much better. I’ve always had a hard time finding relationships and love. It’s been something I’ve been working on for a very long time and I still have a lot of work to do. Thank you.
We're so happy to hear that!
Matt, you espouse so many gems of wisdom on this issue! Same for you, Michael! I wonder if one showed his vulnerability to another who he was interested in if it would generate the other person to show his vulnerability? And bring down the walls of "independence." Thank you both for your candor! Michael, the notion of numbing that you mention is very interesting and insightful. I have experienced sexual anxiety in my past relationships, about which I've wondered if it hasn't turned off some other men. The notion of sensuality is also very important to me. Excellent episode!
I think so 100%. This is the power of vulnerability. When we open up it gives permission to others to open up as well. The question is are you willing to open up first?
Matt
I enjoy listening to your podcast on Spotify during my commute to or from work. I love the interesting & well thought out topics you guys cover. Would love to hear you guys discussed your interaction with other members of the LGBT community, whether it’s romantic, hookup, or platonic connections with bisexuals, transgender folks, or lesbians. Maybe how everyone can support each other in the community.
Thanks for tuning in and sharing a topic suggestion 🙏❤️
Thanks for your helpful show ❤
You're welcome! It warms our hearts to hear from our listeners and it means a lot that you love our episodes. We’d love to grow the podcast so we can reach more guys like you who would benefit from this. It would be super helpful if you gave the show a 5-star rating and review on whatever platform you’re listening to us on. PS: If it’s on Apple, here’s the link: podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/gay-men-going-deeper/id1535102476
Fantastic discussion on trust and hyper independence. Thanks. Speaks to me and my limitations. I wonder if trust and introversion have any correlation?
Perhaps the correlation is trauma and introversion due to not feeling safe around people. This can definitely impair trust. So yes I think there is a correction.
Matt
Thank you to you both for part 1&2 on this topic. Perfect timing for me. 💞 Your courage to be as vulnerable and authentic as you both have been, is inspiring and walking your talk. Do either of you know of dating app for demisexuals? If there is no such availabilities. Perhaps we could make that happen?
Not that we know of specifically for demisexuals. Although I've heard Okcupid does have the option to identify as demisexual on their platform.
I think this conversation taught me alot and I am very thankful for that
Including part 1
Love the show--I've been following it for about a year and a half now. I usually listen on the podcast app and I decided to finally join the Facebook group. My request was automatically declined and I'm confused as to why. Maybe you all can shed some light.
We have some really tight criteria to get into the group to protect against spam. Please ensure you have a profile picture. If your profile is less than a year old it will also be declined but you can email our admin team at info@gaymensbrotherhood.com to let them know uou are a real person and they will flag your name and be sure to approve it when you resubmit it. Hope to see you on the inside and out apologies you got declined but it’s not an easy job protecting the integrity of an online community
I just want to say that some pay for sex with zero expectation of intimacy, but only for physical contact.
Big fan over here!!!! Your podcast feels like I'm having beers with my buddies in a patio. You guys are funny because you have all the theory down pat...yet you still show vulnerability and admit that you haven't found the one. I cheer on you and I hope you do the healing required to find an amazing dude if that's what you wish. Cheers PS - Also, thank you for doing the lord's work...because of this episode, I practically forgave all the dudes that have ever ghosted me, were afraid of intimacy, or only wanted sex. It's all good!!! Thanks guys.
Great job! Forgiveness ultimately benefits you because you'll feel lighter and ready to move on
So true 🎉
Thank you for agreeing with us! Welcome to the channel!🤗
‘trust’ yourself, n watch this episode.
Good lord u guys talk non stop ! I had to jump off this 😬
No wonder i connect with you Matt, you're an empath like me! Unfortunately im a super empath ugh!
This was actually a great conversation. As someone who has years o both of you, your assessment on this topic always stood true for me and I've always followed this format. Time has changed and this generation is very disconnected with reality and can't seem to understand the basics. Funny how I feel like thongs have to be re-learned as opposed to being instinctive! Loved this!❤
I'm likewise an empath, but how does one get super? Def there's a dark side to that
Super empaths feel emotions from all living things. Animals, plants, humans, and the elements of nature. Energy is everywhere, and a super empath feels everything, unfortunately! Nature is the key element to a super empath's recovery. They can't just turn it off like most normal empaths and seek help from others. The elements are its comfort zone!
🚧 Most recently I have😊 discovered a staggering number of people engaging in taking secret video recordings of their sexual encounters. What happens with these recordings I can only imagine. What makes it more unsettling is the lengths some go to in capturing the sexual encounters they are having. Secret hidden cameras are sophisticated and easy to get and are very inexpensive. This is not just a traumatizing experience for the unknowing and non-consenting participants, it is also illegal and violates your rights. I also believe that many if not most of these incidents go unreported to the authorities and the violators get away with their actions and continue to secretly record more sexual encounters with other unsuspecting people. Personally, I have discovered this to be true and the amount of people doing it is disturbing. This has made me think and second think about meeting and engaging with others sexually as it seems this activity is becoming a pandemic. How does one combat this? How do we get the community to stop this horrible trend? How do we help those who have been badly hurt and traumatized by this? And how do we get the message across to everyone that this behaviour is not acceptable?
FAIL ❤First Attempt in Learning :) :) :) ❤