''Like almost every questionable thing in nature, if you ever see something that doesn't make sense, it usually has something to do with getting laid '' Greatest line ever. Should probably be in every book about nature
@@BluetomatoCh Ok so the pointless thing about breasts is that they're permanent; having them out when they're not being used to feed your baby is pointless. That makes sense, but it doesn't mean that breasts are completely and always pointless. And btw, breasts aren't pointless to begin with, since they have nipples.
The last animal actually has a much more interesting backstory than most things on earth. The tuatara might be a reptile but way back after the great dying two groups of reptiles were competing for the new earth as it had just been wiped of 96% of its life, the two groups were the reptiles we have today like crocodiles, lizards, and birds and the other one was the one the tuatara belonged to. Now to the untrained eye the two groups were pretty much indistinguishable but they had a few key features that helped paleontologists define them, I don’t remember them so just bare with me here. In the beginning the tuatara group was actually evolving faster and out competing our reptiles and they had begun taking over the new earth. But eventually the reptiles came out with a new edition that would change the whole course of life forever, Archosaurs. If that name doesn’t sound familiar it’s a term used to describe the very vast majority of the Dinosaurs (I have a horrible memory and can’t remember the exact groups that are archosaurs but I believe things like theropods and ornithischians were at least part of them). The dinosaurs were a complete rework of the reptiles as they could actually do cool things like stand on two feet, and used a complex system of air sacs and different chambers and systems in order to shift their breathing and oxygen intake into maximum overdrive. With these revolutionary tools, the dinosaurs ruled the planet for longer that nearly any other land creature and forced the other reptiles to go into hiding for the foreseeable future. So make sure that next time you see a beautiful recreation of a dinosaur, make sure to thank it for its service and for what it did to make our planet what it is today.
Good news about Jesus Christ! When you first come to him, He completely erases/ forgives your past! You will not be punished for anything bad that you’ve done! Here’s how! (2 Corinthians 5:17)- “If anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation: The old has gone, and the new has come! (Explanation of the Bible verse above): Whenever a person decides to turn their lives to God (and start living by the Bible), they will NOT be punished or penalized for any of their past sins before coming to God. Yes, a clean slate! Or A clean record! This is what Christians mean when they say they’ve been “reborn” or “born again.” (To have their past erased completely and forgiven!)- a chance at redemption to start their lives fresh. (So for example), if a prison inmate decides to confess to his wrong doings, and ask Jesus Christ for forgiveness, Jesus is more than generous enough to forgive him and erase his past completely and give that man a fresh start at life! Yes, A chance at redemption to turn his life around and do the right things this time around. This is what Christians call a “repentance.” “A True Repentance”, (in a biblical sense), is when a person feels guilty, or remorseful or sorry for what they did in their past, so they confess and ask God for forgiveness, and then follow through with turning away from those things which they are sorry for. It’s a complete life turn around. Basically the act of becoming a better person! (Acts 3:19)- “Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away.” (Proverbs 28:13)- “Whoever conceals his sins will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy. Version 4.0
Manatees have to be the most love oriented animal on earth. They're loving parents, loving wild animals, and the only time people have had dangerous encounters with them is when they love you so much, they hug you. They're pretty strong. In Florida, every other free diver has a story about "once, when I was free diving, and this manatee tried to lay me...."
Hood Nature vs Casual Geographic, I feel like hood nature can mean something else other than nature and could be not as marketable as casual geographic
Good news about Jesus Christ! When you first come to him, He completely erases/ forgives your past! You will not be punished for anything bad that you’ve done! Here’s how! (2 Corinthians 5:17)- “If anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation: The old has gone, and the new has come! (Explanation of the Bible verse above): Whenever a person decides to turn their lives to God (and start living by the Bible), they will NOT be punished or penalized for any of their past sins before coming to God. Yes, a clean slate! Or A clean record! This is what Christians mean when they say they’ve been “reborn” or “born again.” (To have their past erased completely and forgiven!)- a chance at redemption to start their lives fresh. (So for example), if a prison inmate decides to confess to his wrong doings, and ask Jesus Christ for forgiveness, Jesus is more than generous enough to forgive him and erase his past completely and give that man a fresh start at life! Yes, A chance at redemption to turn his life around and do the right things this time around. This is what Christians call a “repentance.” “A True Repentance”, (in a biblical sense), is when a person feels guilty, or remorseful or sorry for what they did in their past, so they confess and ask God for forgiveness, and then follow through with turning away from those things which they are sorry for. It’s a complete life turn around. Basically the act of becoming a better person! (Acts 3:19)- “Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away.” (Proverbs 28:13)- “Whoever conceals his sins will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy. Version 4.0
And the Tuatara finds another reason to be one of the coolest lizards on the planet, I remember seeing something about it's third eye years ago but completely forgot. Also the Macaque being so smart really puts hit monkey into perspective lol
3:45 So I knew about the "Mermaids are actually just Manatee's" thing due to their "Similarity". But I DIDN'T know they had like full on hands in their flippers and you just move right on by that fact.
Makes you wonder if his commentary just comes naturally and he's just this hilarious, or he spends literal hours coming up with the most witty sentences to say for a video.
The scariest part of this video isn't even about the elephants. It's the fact that the Snow Monkeys have body language that feels so eerily familiar and human.
@Di it's jut interesting man, i didn't expect that they would be like that. i don't know why you think i'm acting like people like me are scared of technology but your response just feels like you think that you're smarter than me for not finding it scary.
@@mushmush4980 The Uncanny Valley effect, or perhaps an irrational fear of them evolving to dominate the world in a couple hundred generations. Intelligence in species that we are unable to domesticate is inherently kinda scary.
He says, “evolution ran out of ideas so his eyes are social distancing.” I can’t believe I hadn’t heard of this TH-camr until today! He’s incredibly witty!
Hey man I just wanted to say I really enjoy ur content and I have learned so much from these videos. As someone who wants to peruse biology, I like your witty sentences and funny descriptions
1:36 when I lived in Thailand I had s soft shell turtle like that one but it was actually a snapping turtle and he lived in our pond we had. He never bit anyone and wasn’t aggressive at all :)
It's because of Crocodile Hunter. I watched soooooo much Steve Irwin on Animal Planet it's not even funny. Like you bet your ass I watched every second of a Croc Files marathon every time.
The gland fluid is also a sign of strong emotions! If you watch a video of a new calf being born, you’ll see the members of the herd with the fluid on their faces. Basically they’re a bunch of excited aunts, sisters and cousins and I find this freaking adorable! 🥰
This man needs his own docu-TV-movie series. Not only is he absolutely hysterical but insanely intelligent oh…did I mention hilarious? Absolutely love this TH-cam channel!!!
This channel is the equivalent to that scene in the matrix when Neo gets a mass plethora of information downloaded into his head within seconds. Except this time the quote is "I know animals"
That and the fact that he essentially did some quick maths on a napkin and severely undercalculated the circumference of the earth makes me think that whole voyage was just an attempt to let him die at sea. Schools have some explaining to do, saying he was smart and everyone else was a flat earther. That's a total lie, a Greek dude named Eratosthenes back in 240 BC actually calculated the earth's circumference using two sticks, the shadows they made in the sun, and a lot of math in his head. He was only off by about 5 yards or so, and I'd say given the circumstances that it's a forgivable mistake considering he used no paper and pen for these calculations. People rolled with that ever since he published a book about it and the methods he used in the Library of Alexandria (to our knowledge, no copies of it survived the ages, sadly), and it was assumed that the Atlantic was just an empty, giant ocean that you'd probably die trying to cross because ships couldn't hold enough food for the voyage. Nobody knew that there was a continent here, Columbus got lucky and was dumb enough to think the native Cubans were Japanese.
Regarding turtles and breathing underwater: Some of them can absorb oxygen from the water, via blood vessels in their anuses. This doesn't provide a lot of oxygen, but it's enough that a brumating (like hibernation but for reptiles) turtle can park itself at the bottom of a pond until things warm up again in spring.
Nice! Not a lot of people know that, keep up the Herpin my friend, the world needs more open minds like yur ready to soak up knowledge like a turtles, well u know. 🤣 And not only water turtles but even box turtles n some tortoises can do this, that's why u should always put a dish of water that goes a third of the way up their shell in any tortoise enclosure. When they absorb the water it's not jus the oxygen they get out of it, it's pretty amazing really. 🖖
4:49 “We now return to Australia’s Got Talent! Let’s give a round of applause to heavenly voices of the finalists!” Koala: (demonic groaning) Fairy Penguin: (horny roaring) Cassowary: (Jurassic park mixed with attempts to clear a congested throat)
*God still laughing God: "Michale come quick" Michael: "what now" God: "A turtle! With no shell 😂" Michael: "Is that another fucking elephant nose? You need to stop doing that" God: "🤣"
5:00 Australian here, and I first discovered what Koalas sounded like when I was sleeping in a tent underneath them. Needless to say, I didn't get a lot of sleep that night.
I know you’re hugely popular and I’m a nobody but I have to say I really like your show I really like your delivery… Good job. I know your momma is proud. My son turns 18 in two months and whatever he chooses I hope he has your same success and charisma
Sharks in reality: " Oh bro sorry I hit you I thought you were food-. :( " Scorpions in reality: " A A A, Bonjour, forgive mwa for stinging you, I am Le shy. " Orcas in reality: *I’m going to increase my kill count.*
"if you ever see something in nature that doesn't make sense, it usually has something to do with getting laid" - this is so funny dude, congrats for the good work and I hope you keep on doing it 👌🧠 Edit: it was just "keep up the good work" after comma
Since elephants are distantly related to mammoths, this means that male mammoths also went into musth. A mummified mammoth head was found with the same opening.
4:20 its happened and there was no good reason. Apparently to appease spirits, but I think they killed it first. Pretty much a bunch of sailors needed a reason to try and justify it.
Male Elephant: I like you. I want you. Now we can do this the easy or we can do this the hard way. The choice is yours. Rhino: Well, I don't think you and I aren't gonna be doing anything. Male Elephant: Okay. I see we doing this the hard way.
@@underworldguardian704 to which boondocks got from real life booty warrior that literally said that exact thing. I don't remember his name wish I did but saw original interview. Now I like ya and I wants ya. We can do this the easy way or the hard way choice is yours. He also went on saying sex was most important thing in jail. More than money, food, all about sex. He considered himself a booty warrior
The way you casually execute the damn jokes and the jokes themselves are just so god damn hilarious. Like for christ sakes "that bug would have glasses that would need a passport" had me dead.
cassowaries sound like an old V8 on idle, but 2 of the pistons are rusting off and the other 6 have not had their oil replaced since the engine was manufactured
Of course it wants to kill me. Elephants never forget to do that. Narwhals are terrified of us, but they still stop Cthulhu eating us. Truly we don't deserve them.
CG: "Deathstroking a rhino that just wanted directions to the watering hole." (My brain): Elephant wearing an orange and navy blue ninja mask after initiating a Clash Encounter with the rhino and spending all 3 of its Power Bars: "Do you prefer tusk, or trunk?"
"By far their biggest Op is the Philippines Eagle, which claps them on an egregious level" this is such a well constructed and culturally diverse sentence. well narrated my G!
@@hankjwimbleton4010 "I saw, I conquered, I came" Seems kinda obvious ... for the joke. `If you have to explain a joke, it wasn't funny // If you have to explain a joke, there is no joke` - Joker
"Manatees have the most similar vajaja to humans than any other animal." Like he said, I don't want to know how they know that. Edit: I just realized another disturbing idea: It said the manatee has the most human-like-vajaja of *any* animal. Implying they violated *multiple* species to land on this conclusion.
The koalas “growl” could potentially be used for the sounds made by any given creature in a horror film. Slow it down, speed it up, use it as-is...it’ll work.
Tuatara also have two rows of teeth on their upper jaw, they use this in conjunction with their one row on their lower jaw to shear and break chitin and bone. Unfortunately, while this is really cool, it wears out their teeth on their lower jaw quite fast and they do not regrow lost teeth, so most older tuataras are reduced to grinding softer food between their jaws
Cassowaries, soft shell turtles, and crocodiles are the three relics of prehistoric ages. That first one is pretty much a raptor with feathers and a beak
"Ayo dude thats my girl ! " "Sorry bro but I won " "Finee.. I guess ill just kick a baby over and over again till I find the one." "I wish you the best luck man MAN" -elephant handshake-
I’m pretty sure Bearded dragons have the same “third eye” that tuataras have, and if you look at one you can see a white spot on the top of their head, where that eye is
Duude..the worst sound in oz is the sound of possums fighting/fu*king! It’s horrifying 😅 I’m in Hervey Bay QLD and the first time I heard it here, I thought it was a serial killer outside my window 😂
That stalk eyed fly. "It's eyes are social distancing" "It's glasses would need a passport" 🤣😆 I'm dying by this sick, oddly specific burns. Edit: wow guys. Thanks for all the likes
"You're not weird. You're just a narwhal."
This needs to be on a t-shirt.
I'd buy it
Nice profile
*I’m already on it*
I didn’t even know narwhals existed lol
@@user-gi7dn1go4v w h a t
Everyone to Columbus: "I came, I saw, I conquered."
Columbus to everyone: "Actually, I just came."
😂😂😂😂
He came
He saw
He conquered
He balled a manatee lmao
He saw, he conquered, he came.
He saw, he conquered, he came.
She came, I came,
Now what's my name?
''Like almost every questionable thing in nature, if you ever see something that doesn't make sense, it usually has something to do with getting laid ''
Greatest line ever.
Should probably be in every book about nature
This line just about sums up nature
The same is true for human female breasts. They make no rational sense at all.
@@BluetomatoCh How come?
@@birthdayzrock1426 th-cam.com/video/xcrxNBlqrbM/w-d-xo.html
@@BluetomatoCh Ok so the pointless thing about breasts is that they're permanent; having them out when they're not being used to feed your baby is pointless. That makes sense, but it doesn't mean that breasts are completely and always pointless. And btw, breasts aren't pointless to begin with, since they have nipples.
The last animal actually has a much more interesting backstory than most things on earth. The tuatara might be a reptile but way back after the great dying two groups of reptiles were competing for the new earth as it had just been wiped of 96% of its life, the two groups were the reptiles we have today like crocodiles, lizards, and birds and the other one was the one the tuatara belonged to. Now to the untrained eye the two groups were pretty much indistinguishable but they had a few key features that helped paleontologists define them, I don’t remember them so just bare with me here. In the beginning the tuatara group was actually evolving faster and out competing our reptiles and they had begun taking over the new earth. But eventually the reptiles came out with a new edition that would change the whole course of life forever, Archosaurs. If that name doesn’t sound familiar it’s a term used to describe the very vast majority of the Dinosaurs (I have a horrible memory and can’t remember the exact groups that are archosaurs but I believe things like theropods and ornithischians were at least part of them). The dinosaurs were a complete rework of the reptiles as they could actually do cool things like stand on two feet, and used a complex system of air sacs and different chambers and systems in order to shift their breathing and oxygen intake into maximum overdrive. With these revolutionary tools, the dinosaurs ruled the planet for longer that nearly any other land creature and forced the other reptiles to go into hiding for the foreseeable future. So make sure that next time you see a beautiful recreation of a dinosaur, make sure to thank it for its service and for what it did to make our planet what it is today.
This was a blast to read! LOL
Holy words
@@jenniferjagodzinski1647 get a life
TierZoo watcher?
@@soli2859 perhaps…
"basically it turn him into a 13,000 pound teenager" -Casual Geographic
Wise words. Elephants are menaces to society
@@SlothOfTheSea and geese, especially geese, don’t forget the geese
@@hankjwimbleton4010 The sea Oreo would like a word with you.
@@SlimSamari The Flordian Seagull will see you now.
@@clementinelives Sea Oreo yeets Floridian seagull while dolphins wait their turn.
His eyes are social distancing. His glasses would need a passport.
This dude makes my day with his commentary. It's inspiring XD
exactly lol, hes so funny and it actually kinda makes learning about animals fun
That's how passionate degree owner must be
I always leave with one of his lines stuck in my head!
Good news about Jesus Christ! When you first come to him, He completely erases/ forgives your past! You will not be punished for anything bad that you’ve done! Here’s how!
(2 Corinthians 5:17)- “If anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation: The old has gone, and the new has come!
(Explanation of the Bible verse above):
Whenever a person decides to turn their lives to God (and start living by the Bible), they will NOT be punished or penalized for any of their past sins before coming to God. Yes, a clean slate! Or A clean record!
This is what Christians mean when they say they’ve been “reborn” or “born again.” (To have their past erased completely and forgiven!)- a chance at redemption to start their lives fresh.
(So for example), if a prison inmate decides to confess to his wrong doings, and ask Jesus Christ for forgiveness, Jesus is more than generous enough to forgive him and erase his past completely and give that man a fresh start at life! Yes, A chance at redemption to turn his life around and do the right things this time around.
This is what Christians call a “repentance.”
“A True Repentance”, (in a biblical sense), is when a person feels guilty, or remorseful or sorry for what they did in their past, so they confess and ask God for forgiveness, and then follow through with turning away from those things which they are sorry for. It’s a complete life turn around. Basically the act of becoming a better person!
(Acts 3:19)- “Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away.”
(Proverbs 28:13)- “Whoever conceals his sins will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.
Version 4.0
@@priestfultonjwingbajr1430 Stfu pls
Casual Geographic: “If you’re anxious, you’re probably a narwhal.”
Me: “Maybe I am a *narwhal.”*
I would correct you on the name and say that it's hood nature but it ain't anymore so...
It youse to be hood nature
@@bettyacquah6602 Yeah but he changed it
@@artivo2270 why did he change it?….just curious 👀
@@dizzy9957 I’m not too sure, maybe he was just looking for a change
Manatees have to be the most love oriented animal on earth. They're loving parents, loving wild animals, and the only time people have had dangerous encounters with them is when they love you so much, they hug you. They're pretty strong. In Florida, every other free diver has a story about "once, when I was free diving, and this manatee tried to lay me...."
In 2 years people will be saying "only ogs remember when causal geographic was called hood nature" and i just think its interesting
Hood Nature sounds cooler if i'm gonna be honest. I wonder why he changed it.
@@damotoneko1500 Probably to be more appealing to a larger audience.
@@mikshinee87 explain
Hood Nature vs Casual Geographic, I feel like hood nature can mean something else other than nature and could be not as marketable as casual geographic
I didn't notice he changed it until you said something.
"He came, he saw, he conquered. Just not in that order." Sweet Theotokos.
i shouldn’t have laughed
People really shouldn’t be using the word “came” in 2021
I was so confused but then I read it again and I was like 🚪🏃♀️💨
666th like
Taíno: Are we a joke to you???
A poor rhino during elephant mating season: "War....war never changes."
But their relationship status does
Rhino: Why are we still here, just to suffer.
@@timeportal2859 Why are we still here? Just to get f%cked?
"In war every hole is a trench"
@@wetube6513 "Life is fucking me and I forgot the safe word"
This guy makes me like animals more than I did
But also makes me wanna stay inside
6:58 moral of this video, the saying “Monkey see Monkey do” is a lot more accurate than I originally thought
Well we are basically apes which are often called monkeys so not too surprising
@@arkvoodleofthesacredcrotch6060 yeah, if you want to be super technical apes are indeed monkeys.
I wouldn't object to doing a monkey
“I just wanted directions to the watering hole”
“I’ll show you a watering hole”
💀
Lmfao
“There’s a snake in my waterhole!”
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
“Right behind you.”
*TF2 THEME*
"His glasses would need a passport" Why do him like that?😂😂😂
lmfao fr
Shoebill stork: "First time getting slandered by this guy?"
Funfact: the eyes of this species have been getting wider and wider because the males with the longer eyes only get to mate
Good news about Jesus Christ! When you first come to him, He completely erases/ forgives your past! You will not be punished for anything bad that you’ve done! Here’s how!
(2 Corinthians 5:17)- “If anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation: The old has gone, and the new has come!
(Explanation of the Bible verse above):
Whenever a person decides to turn their lives to God (and start living by the Bible), they will NOT be punished or penalized for any of their past sins before coming to God. Yes, a clean slate! Or A clean record!
This is what Christians mean when they say they’ve been “reborn” or “born again.” (To have their past erased completely and forgiven!)- a chance at redemption to start their lives fresh.
(So for example), if a prison inmate decides to confess to his wrong doings, and ask Jesus Christ for forgiveness, Jesus is more than generous enough to forgive him and erase his past completely and give that man a fresh start at life! Yes, A chance at redemption to turn his life around and do the right things this time around.
This is what Christians call a “repentance.”
“A True Repentance”, (in a biblical sense), is when a person feels guilty, or remorseful or sorry for what they did in their past, so they confess and ask God for forgiveness, and then follow through with turning away from those things which they are sorry for. It’s a complete life turn around. Basically the act of becoming a better person!
(Acts 3:19)- “Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away.”
(Proverbs 28:13)- “Whoever conceals his sins will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.
Version 4.0
@@priestfultonjwingbajr1430 I think you ended up posting on a different video because we were talking about the eye size of flies here?
And the Tuatara finds another reason to be one of the coolest lizards on the planet, I remember seeing something about it's third eye years ago but completely forgot. Also the Macaque being so smart really puts hit monkey into perspective lol
Rhino: Hey man you know where I can find some water?
Elephant: You’ll do nicely. 😈
Rhino: 😢
💀 poor rhino 🤣🤣🤣
The thumbnail is how I imagine the elephant looks throughout this conversation
@@swiftstrike4044 now that’s horrific
😂🤣🤣
@@swiftstrike4044 yup mammals are monsters
“Why this elephant probably want’s you dead” never once in my have I been so scared by a title
the eyes are gonna haunt me in my sleep
"want's"
And i thought the they're/their/there mistakes were bad enough
@@falcongamer58 first of it was autocorrect, and second of all there/their/they’re mistakes are worse
@@yeetmcyeetalot5979 check before you post comment
@@falcongamer58 why so people don’t criticize my spelling, I don’t really care grammar police
3:45 So I knew about the "Mermaids are actually just Manatee's" thing due to their "Similarity". But I DIDN'T know they had like full on hands in their flippers and you just move right on by that fact.
Dolphins, whales and walruses and seals all have hands in their skeletons
Quite a few animals have 5 fingered appendages
Me neither
@@waluigist woah that’s really cool! Thanks for sharing with the class!
@@waluigist woah that’s really cool! Thanks for sharing with the class!
Im pretty sure every aquatic mammal is like that. Its often used as evidence of evolution.
Rhino : Excuse me can to tell me where the watering hole is
Elephant : Fresh meat
Elephant: I think i see it righttt in front of me, and I have a plug for it
@@FushiguroTojl🤣
Fun Fact: Walruses are actually ridiculously intelligent and they don’t get nearly enough credit for that.
I guess that means they are evil too
So that girl probably knew what she was doing 🤨🤢
@@dripapproved1582 which girl?
@@bat6684 y..you-your m..mom AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA🔊🔊🔊🔊🔊📢📢🗿🗿‼️‼️‼️
@@dripapproved1582 ba dum tss
Twitter: Animals are so much better than humans.
Rhino, getting a flashback: no
Underrated comment XD
Humans are the best animals
Oh nah🤣🤣🤣
@@randomstuffs7648
If polar bears are so good why cant they they make tanks?
@@SharkSprayYTP They are the tank…
Makes you wonder if his commentary just comes naturally and he's just this hilarious, or he spends literal hours coming up with the most witty sentences to say for a video.
Makes me wonder how long are you in TH-cam
Ice i just enslaved water
If he wasn't naturally funny, the algorithm wouldn't have brought you here like every other yt algorithm hot spot
Never stop posting everywhere, the day you stop is going to be a sad one indeed 😔
@Welcome to mcdonalds What is you order? Ahm , can i have a large soda 2 big macs hold the onions and some ice cream thank you
"He came, he saw, he conquered-- just not in that order." had me fucking dying for about five minutes.
The scariest part of this video isn't even about the elephants.
It's the fact that the Snow Monkeys have body language that feels so eerily familiar and human.
@Di it's jut interesting man, i didn't expect that they would be like that.
i don't know why you think i'm acting like people like me are scared of technology but your response just feels like you think that you're smarter than me for not finding it scary.
@@mushmush4980 well they are related to us... I mean most apes and monkeys share our body language to some extent especially social ones
@Di orcas are smart and they are fucking *EVIL*
@@mushmush4980 The Uncanny Valley effect, or perhaps an irrational fear of them evolving to dominate the world in a couple hundred generations. Intelligence in species that we are unable to domesticate is inherently kinda scary.
Monkeys are smart to copy human behavior
He says, “evolution ran out of ideas so his eyes are social distancing.” I can’t believe I hadn’t heard of this TH-camr until today! He’s incredibly witty!
me: hey where have i seen that turtle
him: yeah it's the same op from Gumball
me: SHIT, IT'S THE ABOMINATION
that vs the family guy turtle
Facts
No one:
The turtle: FEFEFEFEFEFEfefefefefefefefefefe
You know it's capable of destroying the multiverse. Even Richard Watterson is afraid of it
@@berriboi6865 i think its HIHIHIHIHIHIHIHI but the h sounds half like a T
Hey man I just wanted to say I really enjoy ur content and I have learned so much from these videos. As someone who wants to peruse biology, I like your witty sentences and funny descriptions
Rhino: WAIT STOP
IM A DUDE-
Elephant: *EVEN BETTER*
If there is a hole, there is a way
@@aran2150 lol
I wonder what a cross between a rhino and an elephant would look like 🤔
@@kittykittybangbang9367 elephino. ELPHINO
@@kittykittybangbang9367 A killing machine
People: Save the elephants! save the dolphins!
Every animal that lives in the same habitat: *No.*
Rhino: *'Nam Flashbacks*
Sharks: *PTSD intensifies*
Otter: *Slowly nodding to the elephant and dolphin*
pufferfish: those motherfuckers played ball and got high using me
Hippos: Nah they're cool.
Sunday school teacher: what did you learn about creation kids?
Kids: everything was created to get laid
Eating, drinking, breathing and getting busy, the 4 rules of living beings
Eat drink breed sleep repeat
There is much more complicated reason but we arent playing our role and make it everyones problem
Unless you guys are ignoring "nature's call" and soiling every pair of pants you've ever owned, taking a crap is on that list too.
You mean everything "evolved" to get laid.
1:36 when I lived in Thailand I had s soft shell turtle like that one but it was actually a snapping turtle and he lived in our pond we had. He never bit anyone and wasn’t aggressive at all :)
It's bloody refreshing to hear an American that is so knowledgeable about our Aussie animals.
It's because of Crocodile Hunter. I watched soooooo much Steve Irwin on Animal Planet it's not even funny. Like you bet your ass I watched every second of a Croc Files marathon every time.
The gland fluid is also a sign of strong emotions! If you watch a video of a new calf being born, you’ll see the members of the herd with the fluid on their faces. Basically they’re a bunch of excited aunts, sisters and cousins and I find this freaking adorable! 🥰
I don't think the rhino agrees with you
@@thaliacrafts407 No, they wouldn’t…because I’m talking about elephants…?
That sounds really freaky
@@bat6684 Sorry 😅. Zoology is a bit of a hobby of mine.
@@alicecheshire4806 It's.... a joke.....
This man needs his own docu-TV-movie series. Not only is he absolutely hysterical but insanely intelligent oh…did I mention hilarious? Absolutely love this TH-cam channel!!!
agreed
Tv ruins everything, let him stay on yt
Who watched TV anymore?
A Manatee looks just like those micro Water Bears that you can see with a microscope.
@@AlanTClark Tardigrades?
This guy can never miss, always bringing in the comedy, keep it up bro
This channel is the equivalent to that scene in the matrix when Neo gets a mass plethora of information downloaded into his head within seconds. Except this time the quote is "I know animals"
"Maybe your not weird, your just a narwhal." I feel so much better.....
@@madhumithamkushra9107 Glad I am not the only one!
There's down bad, and then there's Christopher Columbus.
Poor manatees...
Rule 34 😂😂😂
He was so thirsty he didn't realize he was fucking a animal, he might have fucked a male if you want to think about that.
@@tylersurma4093 he was banging a wild beast without knowing the gender? That's even worse than normal zoophile
@@brawmankerlexterminateurde860 Christopher Columbus is just built different I guess.
That and the fact that he essentially did some quick maths on a napkin and severely undercalculated the circumference of the earth makes me think that whole voyage was just an attempt to let him die at sea.
Schools have some explaining to do, saying he was smart and everyone else was a flat earther. That's a total lie, a Greek dude named Eratosthenes back in 240 BC actually calculated the earth's circumference using two sticks, the shadows they made in the sun, and a lot of math in his head. He was only off by about 5 yards or so, and I'd say given the circumstances that it's a forgivable mistake considering he used no paper and pen for these calculations. People rolled with that ever since he published a book about it and the methods he used in the Library of Alexandria (to our knowledge, no copies of it survived the ages, sadly), and it was assumed that the Atlantic was just an empty, giant ocean that you'd probably die trying to cross because ships couldn't hold enough food for the voyage. Nobody knew that there was a continent here, Columbus got lucky and was dumb enough to think the native Cubans were Japanese.
5:36 bro sounds like the AUUUGH meme 💀
"Columbus may not have discovered America but he discovered Rule 34" You absolute MENACE
He came, he saw, he conquered
@@Oskar0424 you mean cumquered?
I swear I was dying on this part 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@Oskar0424 He came, he came, he came.
Regarding turtles and breathing underwater: Some of them can absorb oxygen from the water, via blood vessels in their anuses. This doesn't provide a lot of oxygen, but it's enough that a brumating (like hibernation but for reptiles) turtle can park itself at the bottom of a pond until things warm up again in spring.
Nice, reverse farts
@@intimpulliber7376 😂🤣😂🤣
So, it's a technicality that proves the fact?
Nice! Not a lot of people know that, keep up the Herpin my friend, the world needs more open minds like yur ready to soak up knowledge like a turtles, well u know. 🤣 And not only water turtles but even box turtles n some tortoises can do this, that's why u should always put a dish of water that goes a third of the way up their shell in any tortoise enclosure. When they absorb the water it's not jus the oxygen they get out of it, it's pretty amazing really. 🖖
@@intimpulliber7376 lmfaooo
One more animal I'd add to the list of demonic-sounding animals: ocelots. Especially the chainsaw-lawnmower hybrid sounds they make in heat.
mountain lion screams are panic inducing.
Tazmainian Devils
Shoebill Stork's jackhammer sound
Canadian Geese during mating season is also pretty intense. And horrifying. Seriously.
@@jessicasfluidart Oh I'm familiar. My geese landlords give folks night-terrors.
Hearing that manatee fact is like hearing the Vaporeon copypasta for the first time.
I refuse to Google that and I curse you for the picture it put in my head.
4:49
“We now return to Australia’s Got Talent! Let’s give a round of applause to heavenly voices of the finalists!”
Koala: (demonic groaning)
Fairy Penguin: (horny roaring)
Cassowary: (Jurassic park mixed with attempts to clear a congested throat)
Kangaroo: 5 year old me imitating a dinosaur
*God laughing uncontrollably
Michael: "what did you do?"
God: "Look Michael an elephant goat! I'm a genius!"
Michael: 😐🤦🏼♂️
God is a comedic genius lol
*God still laughing
God: "Michale come quick"
Michael: "what now"
God: "A turtle! With no shell 😂"
Michael: "Is that another fucking elephant nose? You need to stop doing that"
God: "🤣"
Why did I read the god's words in Rick's voice
"Gabe- Gabriel, get in here"
"what now?"
"p-pffft Duck Beaver. A Duck Beaver, Gabriel!!"
"YHWH y-"
"It's venomous too."
"Y-
"Barbs on it's legs"
"YHWH stop it. You're scaring me."
@@overlookers lmao
5:00 Australian here, and I first discovered what Koalas sounded like when I was sleeping in a tent underneath them.
Needless to say, I didn't get a lot of sleep that night.
I know you’re hugely popular and I’m a nobody but I have to say I really like your show I really like your delivery… Good job. I know your momma is proud. My son turns 18 in two months and whatever he chooses I hope he has your same success and charisma
The first image looks like the elephant is happy that he can add another body to the counter
It really does
Rip to the person that got But* ra**d That film Him
You mean subtract someone from the census
Elephant: I came looking for booty
Sharks in reality: " Oh bro sorry I hit you I thought you were food-. :( "
Scorpions in reality: " A A A, Bonjour, forgive mwa for stinging you, I am Le shy. "
Orcas in reality:
*I’m going to increase my kill count.*
Rhinos and Anteaters in reality: I cant see shit,but you're probably a threat!Here I go!
Hippos in reality: _EVERYDAY I WAKE UP AND I HOPE YOURE DEAD_
I like how we just agree to scorpions being french XD
@@Rxph_Bxrt I don't think it is even in europe lol
@@Rxph_Bxrt they are French
@@Rxph_Bxrt they’re more French than the McDonald’s fries I ate for lunch
“It’s eyes are social distancing, his glasses would need a passport”
IM DECEASED LMFSOEKBEJAHWJSJAJDHEJS
😐
😐
Damn you did the funny thing when you smash the keyboard, got the whole squad laughing 😐
😐
🤣
"If you see something in nature that doesn't make sense,it's probably to get laid"
-Casual Geographic 2020
"if you ever see something in nature that doesn't make sense, it usually has something to do with getting laid"
- this is so funny dude, congrats for the good work and I hope you keep on doing it 👌🧠
Edit: it was just "keep up the good work" after comma
Actually applys to us humans
@@xyx2188 hahahahahahaha yessss totes
christopher columbus: that’s a mermaid
everybody: nawl bro that’s a sea whale
christopher columbus: gots to see it thru my boy
😳
And saw It through he did ... through and THROUGH
what the fuck?
Honestly, with all the other fucked up shit I know about him, I wouldn't even be surprised. Dude was kinda just a lucky psychotic jackass.
Since elephants are distantly related to mammoths, this means that male mammoths also went into musth. A mummified mammoth head was found with the same opening.
And the ice age also had larger, hairier rhinos to go along with the larger, hairier elephants. Rhinos have it rough
Mammoths 🦣 are larger then modern elephants 🐘
By that logic and realization, it’s a wonder how Manny from Ice Age didn’t choo choo trained Diego and Sid.
@@gangstagamegangstagame4467 It depends on the type of mammoth
4:20 its happened and there was no good reason. Apparently to appease spirits, but I think they killed it first. Pretty much a bunch of sailors needed a reason to try and justify it.
Of course it’s at 4:20
Male Elephant: I like you. I want you. Now we can do this the easy or we can do this the hard way. The choice is yours.
Rhino: Well, I don't think you and I aren't gonna be doing anything.
Male Elephant: Okay. I see we doing this the hard way.
Warrior!
@@eddiegarcia8422 let that be known
Perfect boondocks reference!
🤣
Man, if you're gonna quote the booty warrior at least get it right.
@@underworldguardian704 to which boondocks got from real life booty warrior that literally said that exact thing. I don't remember his name wish I did but saw original interview.
Now I like ya and I wants ya. We can do this the easy way or the hard way choice is yours.
He also went on saying sex was most important thing in jail. More than money, food, all about sex. He considered himself a booty warrior
"Every time you ask the question "why" nature adds or removes a nipple from a domestic house cat."
Zefrank?
@@kziila0244 Nailed it
I love this dudes videos. He is making being smart cool again. He's both funny and informative. We need more people like him doing stuff like this.
The Christopher Columbus part had me literally laughing out loud!!
The way you casually execute the damn jokes and the jokes themselves are just so god damn hilarious. Like for christ sakes "that bug would have glasses that would need a passport" had me dead.
It's by Graystillplays
Soft shell turtle looks like he wants to know if you have games on yo phone
4:11 Ya called me bro?
cassowaries sound like an old V8 on idle, but 2 of the pistons are rusting off and the other 6 have not had their oil replaced since the engine was manufactured
That is creative...
Oddly specific
“awwwww my newborn is so cute…”
their newborn: 2:59
LMAO
Panicked laughter
Newborn mammal: let me embrace death and not by cooking
I love how most animals will straight rob you blind and then take it as reason for a death threat when you take your shit back
*Rule Britannia plays*
8:55 this picture of the Saiga in particular is actually adorable to the point that i want to hug it.
Of course it wants to kill me. Elephants never forget to do that.
Narwhals are terrified of us, but they still stop Cthulhu eating us. Truly we don't deserve them.
GOOD LORD SOMEONE ELSE THATK KNOWS THAT SONG! HAZA!
The fact that the rhino can carry the elephants weight is what’s most surprising
It can‘t. They die because their spine breaks because of the elephant‘s weight
@@1zebbe3 Jesus fucking Christ
@@1zebbe3 so they get raped to death?
@@1zebbe3 Haha oh no that's messed up
@@Zack-fu4lo yes
CG: "Deathstroking a rhino that just wanted directions to the watering hole."
(My brain):
Elephant wearing an orange and navy blue ninja mask after initiating a Clash Encounter with the rhino and spending all 3 of its Power Bars: "Do you prefer tusk, or trunk?"
Thigh
Lol
Not going to lie that’s exactly what I imagined a cassowary sounded like
Bearded dragons have that same "third eye"
Divergent evolution is freaking sweet
Don't iguanas have it too?
@@-Ghostess no
Oh yes
Trust me, If an elephant wanted me dead, I'd be dead.
Damn
How does a giant lizard die to an elephant
@@anguirus9260 ... are you sure you want to know?
@@anguirus9260 ANGUIRUS?!
"By far their biggest Op is the Philippines Eagle, which claps them on an egregious level" this is such a well constructed and culturally diverse sentence. well narrated my G!
take my upvote
Elephant: So you choose death. Me: "Laughing as i shoulder my .700 nitro express"
I genuinely, 100%, entirely thought that the turtle’s face was something giving birth
Casual Geographic “Rule 34 he came he saw he conquered”
Christopher Columbus “ uhhhh “
Veni, vidi, vici ... just not in that order.
@@AvangionQ what is the order?
@@hankjwimbleton4010 "I saw, I conquered, I came"
Seems kinda obvious ... for the joke.
`If you have to explain a joke, it wasn't funny // If you have to explain a joke, there is no joke` - Joker
I didn't even realize that he changed his name until I saw your comment.
"Manatees have the most similar vajaja to humans than any other animal."
Like he said, I don't want to know how they know that.
Edit: I just realized another disturbing idea: It said the manatee has the most human-like-vajaja of *any* animal. Implying they violated *multiple* species to land on this conclusion.
Depends on what type of chick you're into, I suppose.
@@burbanpoison2494 r/cursedcomments
Lol where do you think they got the idea for mermaids 🧜♀️?
sailors were very lonely in ye olde times, and those that didn't bang each other looked for Other Methods to relieve themselves
@@kaelang12 Sir, how many manatees have you violated? Just asking?
3:32 As soon as you said that the video cut to an ad.
It's just a matter of time before this guy gets his own show. His content is very original and hilarious.
Cassowary: **Sounds, And looks, like a dinosaur.**
Casual Geographic: Hell naw, to da naw naw naw.
The koalas “growl” could potentially be used for the sounds made by any given creature in a horror film. Slow it down, speed it up, use it as-is...it’ll work.
“ that weird cousin that only shows up to every fourth family reunion “ bro called me out in 900 languages
Tuatara also have two rows of teeth on their upper jaw, they use this in conjunction with their one row on their lower jaw to shear and break chitin and bone. Unfortunately, while this is really cool, it wears out their teeth on their lower jaw quite fast and they do not regrow lost teeth, so most older tuataras are reduced to grinding softer food between their jaws
Cassowaries, soft shell turtles, and crocodiles are the three relics of prehistoric ages. That first one is pretty much a raptor with feathers and a beak
Raptors had feathers themselves
there were some raptors with beaks too
Raptors were way smaller
@@crystalgeek78 depends on the raptor, megaraptors, utahraptors and dakotaraptors were pretty big
@@crystalgeek78 that depends on what kind of raptor you're talking about.
"The pet that will live long enough to attend your funeral"
At that point this lizard will be your grandkids birthday present.
Had a friend in my teens that inherited his grandfather's 80 year old turtle. It happens.
8:05 dude looks like scrat from ice age
This man is the reason why animals have my interest now as they did when I was younger.
NZ is not the nerfed little brother of australia, we are the younger sibling that turned out slightly better off.
True , were on easy and their on for the worthy
that's just what a kiwi would say.
@@CrazyGuyoftheWest i am a kiwi 😂😂
@@thatonegeonerd5803 You act as though I didn't figure that out by "We". I can pretend to be surprised if you want.
@@CrazyGuyoftheWest oh my god no, if that came off as rude in any way shape or form i apologise. I kinda just type and dont think about it
the 'outback bush bear's sound was just. "SCREEEEECH- *boat engine > burp* "
5:10
Tell me about it. I was scared at first imagining that sound in the dead of night, but then I laughed at the burp.
The casuary sounds like putting buckles in a garbage disposal
Imagine this guy getting a Netflix show
I'd watch that.
He would be a hit.
I like watching him for free on here
I'd like to see a video of him just roasting animals. He wouldn't even need facts.
that'd be funny af
Lol son a beast
There's one where he call animals anything but theire namw
Half of these videos are him roasting certain animals
fun fact: narwhals horns are actually one of their front teeth.
That soft shell turtle is the UGLIEST thing I have ever seen in my entire life.
This is literally the only channel that teaches about animals that I can actually learn from
Animal kingdom is cool
You should check out Ze Frank.
This channel and zefrank are basically The Daily Show and Last Week Tonight for nature.
"Ayo dude thats my girl ! "
"Sorry bro but I won "
"Finee.. I guess ill just kick a baby over and over again till I find the one."
"I wish you the best luck man MAN"
-elephant handshake-
"That's my girl!"
"Sorry dude but I won."
"But she was the last one left." (Sees a rhino.)
"Don't. Please. Just don't."
@@runningcommentary2125 the rhino who just wanted to pass by
I’m pretty sure Bearded dragons have the same “third eye” that tuataras have, and if you look at one you can see a white spot on the top of their head, where that eye is
Yup mine has one
A lot of lizards have a third eye.
Duude..the worst sound in oz is the sound of possums fighting/fu*king! It’s horrifying 😅 I’m in Hervey Bay QLD and the first time I heard it here, I thought it was a serial killer outside my window 😂
That stalk eyed fly.
"It's eyes are social distancing"
"It's glasses would need a passport"
🤣😆 I'm dying by this sick, oddly specific burns.
Edit: wow guys. Thanks for all the likes
💀💀💀
i don't get the passport joke
@@whyarewestillherejusttosuf5964 Like, they're so far apart that they're in different countries.
Hammerhead fly got me.
999 likes