Crack Addicted Trick interview-Patrick

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ส.ค. 2024
  • Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of Patrick, a crack addicted trick in Los Angeles.
    Here's a link to a follow up interview with Patrick: • Crack Addict interview...
    Here's a link to a GoFundMe campaign to help some of the people seen in SWU interviews: gofund.me/d79e...
    Here’s a link to audio only versions of SWU videos: asmrdb.fanlink...

ความคิดเห็น • 7K

  • @push555push
    @push555push 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6158

    "I want people to love me because I don't love me." Hit hard

    • @Articulated84Beauty
      @Articulated84Beauty 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      Yes. It definitely hit different. ♥️

    • @thematriarchy2075
      @thematriarchy2075 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      I love you 😘

    • @Amanda-bt1ur
      @Amanda-bt1ur 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      exactly! He's definitely different. and he is right CRACK IS AWFUL.

    • @nurseanastasialiberty
      @nurseanastasialiberty 3 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      Yes, that hit me hard too. I used to struggle with self-love growing up and after I lost my fiance last year. Self-love is something we have to learn on our own. Every day I tell myself that "I am lovable" and "deserve love". I still believe in love. Everyone is lovable and I hope Patrick knows that he is lovable.

    • @Gunnar2V
      @Gunnar2V 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Same here. Very sad.

  • @ODBonesCorleone402
    @ODBonesCorleone402 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +258

    I had to come back to his first video after watching the one of him that Mark posted this morning. He is now 2 years sober and the turn around he made is UNBELIEVABLE. Good job, Patrick! Good job.

    • @lisabever2115
      @lisabever2115 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Me too!!!

    • @dominic7178
      @dominic7178 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Proud of him

    • @Love407here
      @Love407here 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I did too his story just shows recovery is possible if you really want to quit
      Patrick looks so healthy and happy in his update interview proud of you Patrick look at you now Rocking Recovery hugs

    • @jeepmanxj
      @jeepmanxj 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      "I wonder how much this videos going to affect my life". As of the most recent video and his story, positively and I hope he keeps with it.

    • @heatherfrost1900
      @heatherfrost1900 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I know! I just saw it today and had to come back. The glow up is amazing. He is a beautiful human and he will do amazing things with that wonderful brain, heart and sincere personality.

  • @anthonyaguilar8175
    @anthonyaguilar8175 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3866

    I know this man personally and he is one of the kindest most sincere people I've had the pleasure to meet in the rooms. I pray he makes it back.

    • @PRMermaid
      @PRMermaid 3 ปีที่แล้ว +89

      Tell him that he can make it out of this. To pinch himself and say "God help me please" it works

    • @philipnava8165
      @philipnava8165 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      That’s where I know him from. Good dude.

    • @Nevs-
      @Nevs- 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      Addiction is the worst disease ..

    • @likearitual
      @likearitual 3 ปีที่แล้ว +302

      @@PRMermaid God is unessecary. Power of will is your God. I'm tired of the God talk in addiction circles, we've moved past that as a society

    • @PRMermaid
      @PRMermaid 3 ปีที่แล้ว +129

      @@Nevs- I Pray to God everyday because he is the Only one that can give me what I'm in need of.

  • @bryanflynn8812
    @bryanflynn8812 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +209

    This is the definition of addiction, he is so self-aware but still can’t shake it. God bless everyone going through this.

    • @bunk95
      @bunk95 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Addiction is fiction. Do you think and act like that is untrue?

    • @bryanflynn8812
      @bryanflynn8812 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      @@Humble-iq5ue lmao I’m guessing you’ve never dealt with substance abuse

    • @bryanflynn8812
      @bryanflynn8812 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      @@bunk95 it’s all a mindset so you are right but the process of getting your mind to change is what people struggle with. That’s addiction.

    • @Humble-iq5ue
      @Humble-iq5ue 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@bryanflynn8812 yeah I've use various drugs throughout the years but never got addicted to anything. So yeah I don't know. It's all mind power to be able to walk away rather than succumb to the fleshly desires.

    • @tmc1415
      @tmc1415 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      @@Humble-iq5uewith certain drugs, by the time you make the decision to “walk away”; you start having withdrawals and are technically “addicted. That’s what dude meant when he said he/you don’t have experience with substance abuse. That’s not me throwing a jab

  • @tiffany935
    @tiffany935 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +65

    As of March 20, 2024, Patrick is SOBER! Way to go, Patrick!!!! 👏👏👏

    • @informationageenterprise2184
      @informationageenterprise2184 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      2 years sober!! Praise God

    • @maryshannagaul4849
      @maryshannagaul4849 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You are amazing Patrick!

    • @carsongibson5145
      @carsongibson5145 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This is my first viewing of Patrick's part 1. I'm glad to see he's kicked it. I always wonder how people are doing now, since I'm watching 3 - 4 yrs behind. So many are heartbreaking. Success is good, awesome job Patrick! 😁

    • @wallsharkconstruction3819
      @wallsharkconstruction3819 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      And married sooo proud

    • @paullemiremusic3101
      @paullemiremusic3101 หลายเดือนก่อน

      When I watched and listened to Patrick I felt a sense of true empathy and compassion for what I consider to be the most genuine and loving soul who came on here to share his pain with all of us. Patrick, I just want to say Thank you for what you did for me in helping get in touch with such deep and loving emotions. Because of you, that happened ❤

  • @Mia-qt4th
    @Mia-qt4th 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2061

    The most likable honest man, I hope he beats this addiction.

    • @larrenzzoamos9753
      @larrenzzoamos9753 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @J NOEL Congrats brotha! Keep going

    • @lori6037
      @lori6037 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @J NOEL Thats awesome, congratulations!

    • @dyingdoesnthurt1967
      @dyingdoesnthurt1967 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You are a lovely guy, I hope you can beat this.
      Thanks for sharing 🙏

    • @fanbatcher
      @fanbatcher 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fake addict.....

    • @phoenixzappa7366
      @phoenixzappa7366 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @J NOEL
      I started smoking it yesterday. It's great! Makes you feel great!

  • @crushyyog3762
    @crushyyog3762 2 ปีที่แล้ว +463

    Being an Ex meth addict.. I identify with the sexual fixation, impotence, and behavior that he speaks about while smoking crack. I engaged in all of it, and it was almost refreshing hearing someone has struggled with the exact same thing. I’m now sober, in college, and getting a degree to become a therapist for those who struggle with addiction.
    We do recover. ❤️

    • @trump24trump
      @trump24trump ปีที่แล้ว +7

      No one cares

    • @domdicenso1656
      @domdicenso1656 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I think all meth users have that sexual fixation. That's simply what meth does. I've never experienced that with crack, just wanting more crack.

    • @PBUH-SAW.
      @PBUH-SAW. ปีที่แล้ว

      Good luck 🙏🏾

    • @sahpire75
      @sahpire75 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      ​@@trump24trump then why ya here? You cared enough to comment

    • @linadang2197
      @linadang2197 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes. Amphetamines causes you to have a Non-Stop p*** and masturbation fixation. It's so disgusting and unnatural. Every once in awhile I will have about a two-week binge on caring about nothing but watching p*** and masturbating when otherwise I'm a semi normal person. So sick of it.

  • @bradr3541
    @bradr3541 2 ปีที่แล้ว +386

    The fact he knows he can’t get a girlfriend and have kids while an addict shows how grounded in reality he still is. The fact he still wants those things is also commendable. I wish he had someone close to give him tough love.

    • @richieh2006
      @richieh2006 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same. That's what he needs.

    • @sirdopaminesjournal3292
      @sirdopaminesjournal3292 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Not to take anything away from Patrick, but all addicts feel the same way.

    • @juliettezea9507
      @juliettezea9507 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I can’t get a family either

    • @Godmadeanna
      @Godmadeanna ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@sirdopaminesjournal3292 there’s a lot of addicts that are in relationships and have children so not really

    • @Sir_Vex_DestroyerOfSemenDemons
      @Sir_Vex_DestroyerOfSemenDemons ปีที่แล้ว +1

      tough love doesnt work. addicts wont get clean until THEY are ready to get clean

  • @emilioemele
    @emilioemele 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2070

    Man, this is one of the most profound, confusing, intellectual, menacing and beautiful interviews you’ve done.

    • @Djzommer1
      @Djzommer1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      crack

    • @juliequigley637
      @juliequigley637 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Right because he is actually a normal person I’ve been there done that

    • @rsohlich1
      @rsohlich1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Addiction is a mofo.

    • @kapowitsme7646
      @kapowitsme7646 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      You described this interview so well!😀

    • @heckyes137
      @heckyes137 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Its called self awareness. Alot of people should try it out. I hear all the kids are doing it. 😉

  • @Ginny71166
    @Ginny71166 2 ปีที่แล้ว +981

    I _really, really, really_ like this dude.
    He’s the most honest addict I’ve ever heard share his story… and I have ten years and eight months sober, so I’ve heard a _lot_ of stories.

    • @GnosticCushite
      @GnosticCushite 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You look like you got trouble written all over you.

    • @maximeanselot3007
      @maximeanselot3007 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I hope you stay sober. I know it's hard

    • @zadekeys2194
      @zadekeys2194 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      11years Well done !!!

    • @phanx0m924
      @phanx0m924 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      wooohooo

    • @leax6968
      @leax6968 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Congrats 👏 love hearing its even possible. Currently on maintenance myself

  • @lisabever2115
    @lisabever2115 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +74

    Watching this after seeing the follow up of sober Patrick. He is truly a miracle!

    • @joshweaver7998
      @joshweaver7998 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      first time in a while ive even brought to tears. so inspirational

    • @lisabever2115
      @lisabever2115 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@joshweaver7998 I know. Gives you hope for so many who appear to be completely hopeless.

  • @harryismystyle
    @harryismystyle ปีที่แล้ว +26

    “I want other people to love me because I don’t love me”
    Broke my heart. Rooting for you Patrick

  • @Addsiqishrb
    @Addsiqishrb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3347

    You can literally see the normal person in him trapped in this high mind.

    • @kingofthetrill
      @kingofthetrill 3 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      This was me but on coc and liquor 2 years ago. I'm still not sober but I'm alot better now

    • @NomadicNotions866
      @NomadicNotions866 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Yo!!!!! There were 111 likes and I scrolled through and saw this... Great week ahead!!!!

    • @michelofelia7735
      @michelofelia7735 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      So as If hes In a trance in a constant tug of war.

    • @Lord_Pender
      @Lord_Pender 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Dude like literally man...literally...not physically or metaphorically...but literally dude...

    • @michaeltammaro9434
      @michaeltammaro9434 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      You can see the normal person in him on the follow-up video.

  • @wesplumley1593
    @wesplumley1593 3 ปีที่แล้ว +773

    "man I wonder how this video will affect my life ?" Brother I hope this video affects your life in the most positive and uplifting way possible.

    • @crabbygramma5553
      @crabbygramma5553 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      AND, how is this video going to affect other people’s lives?

    • @wesplumley1593
      @wesplumley1593 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@crabbygramma5553 kind of the whole point of the series I feel..... but I was praising the gentleman who candidly and emotionally told his story, hoping he can find health and happiness.

    • @melindachmielewski9166
      @melindachmielewski9166 ปีที่แล้ว

      expecially if ur tell ur friend he passed away from a heart attack

    • @TheWingus
      @TheWingus ปีที่แล้ว +3

      These 5 videos are waaaaay more effective than any DARE program where a cop talks to you about all the bad things that will happen to you if you smoke one joint or drink one beer

    • @informationageenterprise2184
      @informationageenterprise2184 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      This comment aged like FINE WINE. March 20th 2024 a video is posted with Patrick and he is 2 years clean and sober. Praise God!

  • @MuMu-fu7qe
    @MuMu-fu7qe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +200

    Watching him gurn and fidget makes me feel tremendous relief to be clean and sober for 3 years. You seem like a great guy and I hope you overcome your addiction, Patrick.

    • @Alienspecies635
      @Alienspecies635 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hope your still clean and sober !

    • @edmunds1875
      @edmunds1875 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Are you from the U.K? I've only ever heard "gurn" here in U.K

    • @danieljames6975
      @danieljames6975 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      yeah me too i was just like that. its just body language saying "i need another hit"

    • @spitbukket6862
      @spitbukket6862 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@edmunds1875we say gurn in Australia as well

    • @bunk95
      @bunk95 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Addiction is fiction.

  • @1sherba
    @1sherba 2 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    My son had a gifted IQ, was an amazing artist- he could draw a picture that looked like a photograph, but he was an addict. His drug of choice was heroin. He got and stayed clean for 3 years but had a relapse & passed away from an accidental overdose 4 years ago this coming June. Drug abuse devastates the addict and their families. I miss him so. 💔 I hope this man can overcome his addiction.

    • @dmitriy6147
      @dmitriy6147 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So sorry for your loss.

    • @1sherba
      @1sherba ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dmitriy6147 Thank you so much.

    • @tylerm1853
      @tylerm1853 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Very sorry to hear that 1sherba

    • @bunk95
      @bunk95 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Addicts are fictional. Do you think and act like that is untrue?

    • @slicko_
      @slicko_ 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      My prayers go out to you. You are not alone

  • @danageibel
    @danageibel 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1057

    Pat was friends with my big brother in high school. I love you, Pat. You were always nice to me even though my brother hated me and I'm rooting for you. You can stay free , I know you can.

    • @allapexallthetime6990
      @allapexallthetime6990 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      M

    • @YENKOGT
      @YENKOGT 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Fuck your brother.... Why do he hates you?

    • @cleopatradawn7821
      @cleopatradawn7821 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@YENKOGT that’s brutal bro… honestly!

    • @demi0758
      @demi0758 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wtf is wrong with your bro man?

    • @michaeldj5
      @michaeldj5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Did he really go to Harvard?

  • @HansJanus
    @HansJanus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +589

    I was clean from heroin for 8 years. Then last year I made the mistake of getting ‘just one bag’ to take the edge off the severity of stress and issues I was dealing with at the time. Fast forward one year - I have sold all my worldly possessions, I mean everything. I have been left with nothing but one massive habit. Keeling this a secret from my family and everyone I love around me adds to the dire situation I’ve created for myself. I took the first steps and admitted defeat today and phoned the addiction centre, the same centre who got me clean years ago. I have an assessment phone call in a couple of days. I’m looking forward to a ‘normal’ life once again. I can’t remember the last time I went to bed and didn’t cry myself to the very little sleep I currently get. I hope he gets his life in order eventually. I hope I do too. Thank you for these videos x

    • @marthawatkins7184
      @marthawatkins7184 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      So did you go to rehab? How are you doing? Hope you're no longer crying every night!

    • @goose33
      @goose33 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Ive been there buddy
      How are you doing now

    • @miracledawn1
      @miracledawn1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I hope you’re doing well! Wishing you peace, love, light and clarity!

    • @yoursurgerysister
      @yoursurgerysister 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Don’t give up. You got this. We are rooting for you.

    • @reesevasquez1434
      @reesevasquez1434 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hey Hans hope you are doing well today, even if it's a bad day know that people are thinking about you and you can always try again tomorrow. As long as you are alive you have a chance to do better and change your life to whatever you want it to be. God loves you no matter what and hes always with you when you feel alone. That space in your head that's emptiness when you think to yourself, that's god just ask him and he will answer.

  • @1v1qsns
    @1v1qsns 2 ปีที่แล้ว +133

    So sad man. He’s such a normal dude he’s just so trapped and he’s smart enough to be aware of it. Just helpless. I hope he finds his way out. Godspeed

    • @pricklycats
      @pricklycats ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Crazy how he went straight to crack that definitely doesn't help. Most people have a somewhat gradual progression from just trying things here and there and then getting more and more into it over time. This man went straight for the most addictive thing possible. I'm kind of surprised he didn't know what crack was with all those anti-crack ads in the 90s.

    • @Alienspecies635
      @Alienspecies635 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is literally like 90% of addicts. It’s not like we don’t know and aren’t aware of what we are doing. A lot of functioning Normal people that just have a terrible addiction whether it’s uppers or downers.

    • @eligreg99
      @eligreg99 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@pricklycatsProbably didn’t really understand what it was but knew of it

  • @stonedmetal666
    @stonedmetal666 2 ปีที่แล้ว +264

    I grew up around addicts, my dad was a pretty big drug dealer. The amount of people i met who were INSANELY smart like Patrick, self aware, and outside of their addiction were completely normal people blows my mind. Its a very strange and sad world to be immersed in. I hope Patrick can overcome his addiction for those who couldn’t.

    • @Samantha-dj7wr
      @Samantha-dj7wr ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I am a recovering addict, I know so many addicts that are so smart & if they got clean they could do so good in life. It’s heartbreaking, when your using nothing else matters.

    • @dustinfowler7868
      @dustinfowler7868 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Pretty much correct,most addicts are very intelligent, including myself! functional tho. Maybe we think too much and are trying to escape it,that's me at least,I have to shut it off sometimes .These interviews are always so emotional.

    • @travisfleenor2418
      @travisfleenor2418 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The number of functioning, even high functioning crack users would blow most people's minds. There are folks who smoke rock that most people would never in a million years think do. I'm sure meth is the same way.

    • @Bigboro
      @Bigboro ปีที่แล้ว

      @@travisfleenor2418my friend Alex smokes Crack and he is a Lawyer.

    • @johnb.shakoor2352
      @johnb.shakoor2352 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      My dad was also a dealer and somehow i managed to be around the trashiest type of drug users lol im not denying that alot of them are normal but ive seen people who actually lost their minds on drugs. Kind of warps my perception of hard drug users but no doubt there are those who just need to get out of a bad habit and can be saved.

  • @amandamia9999
    @amandamia9999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1353

    hes so aware about his disease its crazy. hes literally fighting himself.

    • @denamullen340
      @denamullen340 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      That’s all addicts.
      Well the ones fighting long enough are very aware

    • @omegablack9044
      @omegablack9044 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Do it long enough and there’s no denying it.

    • @Liljuggbean
      @Liljuggbean 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      He’s a sociopath

    • @joncast1
      @joncast1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      Anthony Lara i swear yall watch 1 youtube video n think you a psychiatrist now 😂😂

    • @kyledodge496
      @kyledodge496 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@joncast1 most addicts to have sociopathic tendacies. Saying this as a former heroin addict.

  • @TimeWatch5
    @TimeWatch5 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2022

    I have so much respect for his honestly. He's more honest then my mother.

    • @bobbieoxendine
      @bobbieoxendine 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Mr watch5... how is everything at home?

    • @candicecandy8137
      @candicecandy8137 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Aw🙁...yeah... Noticing things with my dad. People r who they r. Good, bad, neutral. 🤷🏾‍♀️I'm blessed but I get n2 a funk wen it's comes 2 him. THE BAD THING: I have 2 smoke a cigarette b4 I deal with him. Even on phone. But I'm trying 2 stop the tobacco tho. My blood pressure goes up. I don't have chilling mechanisms. Weed IS friend indeed 🤔🤷🏾‍♀️. It helps

    • @pierceoff6747
      @pierceoff6747 3 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      @@candicecandy8137 fuck your writing is hard to understand

    • @robbywallace9402
      @robbywallace9402 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      But his job won't. He just lost EVERYTHING. The state of California is not gonna keep a crackhead engineer on staff. He even said the date of the interview.

    • @fpsdovah2572
      @fpsdovah2572 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      The word you’re looking for is than.

  • @roryslaine7896
    @roryslaine7896 ปีที่แล้ว +71

    I've never done crack, but I'm a massive alcoholic. I've been drinking a litre of rum and 12 beer every single day for like the last 3 years. I can't remember the last time I was properly sober. The way this guy speaks is so spot on. He's incredibly self-aware for being an addict.

    • @jppitre
      @jppitre ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Hey man, I dont know you but I hope you're doing okay. If you haven't gotten a chance, check out Patrick's newest interview with SWU.

    • @mollyringwerm9224
      @mollyringwerm9224 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      wishing you healing and blessings

    • @kellychristensen4059
      @kellychristensen4059 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Praying for you Rory!! I'm in AA and there is hope!!

    • @shawnahathaway4762
      @shawnahathaway4762 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Please, please ...get the help you need. That was my life-long best friend in whole wide world's diet too (except she preferred vodka) at year 4 she suddenly became very ill, was put in a medically induced coma - on life-support. We lost her. She was 45 years old, left 3 beautiful children without their mother. She never dreamed it would actually affect her, especially so quickly - PLEASE get help. You physically can not stop on your own. Please 🥺

    • @cl5193
      @cl5193 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I see comments like yours every once in a great while. I always check the name to see if it's my son. I want it to be him. It never is. I just want to know he's still alive. I cry.

  • @buckfiden156
    @buckfiden156 2 ปีที่แล้ว +439

    He looks like the best undercover cop who ever existed

    • @nedwatrshed
      @nedwatrshed 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Lol

    • @ilovemeevennow9125
      @ilovemeevennow9125 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Damn they say that about me, wish we had cops paycheck 🤣

    • @brianachong5390
      @brianachong5390 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Is it the shirt? It’s the shirt isn’t it? Is it too much? 😂

    • @charliemiller5350
      @charliemiller5350 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      A cop on crack

    • @fabledfantasty7343
      @fabledfantasty7343 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Buck..
      Undercover cops look nothing like this!

  • @nigel4776
    @nigel4776 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2071

    The problem with hard drug addiction is that being sober is almost as miserable as getting high, and those are your only two options

    • @XxNoMinDxX
      @XxNoMinDxX 3 ปีที่แล้ว +124

      You hit it

    • @sewardcurrie
      @sewardcurrie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      well said....and sadly true...

    • @martin1226
      @martin1226 3 ปีที่แล้ว +98

      Nailed it. It's so fucking boring, but being a junkie is just gross. What to dooooooo

    • @nhlombardi6946
      @nhlombardi6946 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Being high is almost as miserable as being sober

    • @johnferretti3274
      @johnferretti3274 3 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      Give it time brother u will start building back your pleasures in your brain, go to the gym and keep being sober and u will start enjoying life. But the first couple months of sobriety sucks and life sucks but b patient it’s worth the fight.

  • @respecthumility1417
    @respecthumility1417 3 ปีที่แล้ว +273

    Old saying. “You can’t be too dumb to get clean but you can be too smart”. Meaning you outthink yourself. I pray he gets it. Extremely articulate.

    • @michaelmuldowney3131
      @michaelmuldowney3131 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      It takes a certain amount of intelligence to convince yourself that next hit is what you need. Even when you know it’s not.

    • @savagecomments9195
      @savagecomments9195 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I hope you see this but I thank you for this comment. I believe that this saying is what led me to come clean of myself. Wow. I’m prolly gonna write that down in my important notebook and read it every morning first thing. Thank you sincerely, -adrian

  • @justincase8160
    @justincase8160 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I’ve learned more from this than all his other interviews. When you see how a person behaves on drugs, it teaches you so much more than a sober person could.

  • @johnj4446
    @johnj4446 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    You can tell this man is being so brutally honest and I love it. There are so many interviews filled with lies but this one is different. I can tell he is a smart dude. Wishing him the best

  • @smax4895
    @smax4895 3 ปีที่แล้ว +758

    It’s so scary to know that even with this much self-awareness and reflection that addiction still wins in most cases.

    • @shellabella8625
      @shellabella8625 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      💯💯💯

    • @666blindrider
      @666blindrider 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Yep. Most people that are addicted to any drug don't make it. When I was in rehab ( I even asked for 2 more months) they told me straight out out of 10 addicts only 2 will make it through this vicious cycle. That really woke me up. 9 years clean off meth, 4 years clean off alcohol. But I still smoke weed to calm me down cause of my major depression and social anxiety since I can remember. Good luck to all the great people that have addiction problems. Take it one day at a time. Exercising lowers my anxiety depression tremendously.

    • @Noise_floorxx
      @Noise_floorxx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yep

    • @brandizunno8943
      @brandizunno8943 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@666blindrider, Congrats! My sister in law, has been an addicted for the last 10+ years. She’s been in and out of many rehabs, but unfortunately she’s still using. Congrats! God Bless 🙏🙏!!!

    • @alyssag.5758
      @alyssag.5758 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      You need alot more than self awareness to overcome crack. Knowing you have a problem is just the first step.

  • @AdamFraserTv
    @AdamFraserTv 3 ปีที่แล้ว +299

    The best part about this interview in my opinion , is that it shows that ANYONE is susceptible to addiction and the devastating affects it has on the mind no matter your background , education etc .

    • @tianitra
      @tianitra 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yes !! Even a Harvard Grad !

    • @nursetherese7894
      @nursetherese7894 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Im an RN that got addicted to opiates at age 38. I hit my bottom and went to treatment (knowing I’d soon be uninsured) the night before I went to treatment I was on the hoestroll trying to make some money. Here I am, multiple degrees, an experienced nurse with an impeccable record, specializing in neonatal intensive care, training other RNs and ending up a junkie. Spoiler alert- I’ve been clean since November 2018 thanks to treatment and SMART recovery for follow up care. Bottom line is, this can happen to anyone

    • @damienholland8103
      @damienholland8103 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Agreed. Many Americans just put them in this neat little box, a category, a stereotype, to feel superior and separate from them.
      I think Mark was right about why he needed to create this channel. Because many people just don't "get it" until they watch these interviews.
      Legalization and regulation of drugs and greater efforts at rehabilitation over incarceration would help reduce the issue which, even politically there is bipartisan agreement on this, is out of control.

    • @AdamFraserTv
      @AdamFraserTv 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Nurse Therese I wish there was a ❤️ button . I don’t know you but I’m proud of you ! You are the type of person we can only hope to have in the medical field or at the very least , in a position to related too , understand and guide other who suffer from addiction . Genuinely happy to hear your story .

    • @sr6061
      @sr6061 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nursetherese7894 what made you put that substance in your body. Why did you make that choice knowing medically what it would do to You?

  • @michaelferreri1256
    @michaelferreri1256 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I can't stop watching this guy and I don't have an explanation for it. Seriously, this is the third time watching all his interviews. Crazy intelligent and honest. No other stories quite like his. I hope he can straighten himself. But I know how impossibly brutal it can be. Thank you for opening up like this Patrick. You're helping people out.

  • @glitzydebs
    @glitzydebs 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    What an absolutely gorgeous man. I had to watch this after seeing his update. The world is a better place for you Patrick

  • @liesarenowtruth3880
    @liesarenowtruth3880 3 ปีที่แล้ว +324

    You're not disgusting, Patrick. You're a human being deserving of dignity, kindness and real love. You have to convince yourself of that.

    • @cochiloco2803
      @cochiloco2803 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      What a kind remark

    • @dangerous8333
      @dangerous8333 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      He didn't say he was disgusting.
      He said it was disgusting to have an impulse for prostitutes that also smoke crack.
      That is disgusting. Don't be an enabler. I like this guy but don't take away stigmas that should be there. Even he thinks it's disgusting. That's why he's saying it.

    • @liesarenowtruth3880
      @liesarenowtruth3880 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@dangerous8333 I recall him saying that he thinks that he is disgusting.
      Please get a life.

    • @boycottjews
      @boycottjews 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Just like being alive 18 years means you should vote.

    • @tomasdelatoba7572
      @tomasdelatoba7572 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dangerous8333 it's hard to hear when he says it but he might have said "I'm so disgusting man" or "It's so disgusting man" but it sounds more like the former than the latter.

  • @agameofdronez
    @agameofdronez 3 ปีที่แล้ว +317

    That’s the curse of being self-aware and intelligent while fighting addiction. You watch yourself gradually become more and more consumed by your DOC. You know what you’re doing is destructive, and when you sober up you’re left to try and restore the damage you’ve caused. You lose control of your own free will. You become an observer in your very own life.

  • @jacobjonas6819
    @jacobjonas6819 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    I just rewatched this interview after about a year and it is just as powerful as the first time. One of the most impactful aspects is hearing Patrick’s dry swallows throughout the interview. I’ve been in the position and been around a lot of people doing cocaine and I know that sound all too well. I legitimately teared up again listening to him read out his sponsor’s text message. Fantastic job to both Mark and Patrick.

    • @jpark28
      @jpark28 ปีที่แล้ว

      I was thinking that too, and then the next few days your mouth and throat and sinuses are all jacked up and it hurts to eat

  • @mclovin_tnt5617
    @mclovin_tnt5617 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    By far the #1 interview on this channel. I’ve watched the Patrick series 10+ times and I would love to see an update on how he’s doing!

    • @domdicenso1656
      @domdicenso1656 ปีที่แล้ว

      Update: He is smoking crack in a sketchy skid row motel room getting set up to be robbed by a street walking hooker.

    • @Mel_o1234
      @Mel_o1234 ปีที่แล้ว

      They just did an update!

    • @brendalynjones4576
      @brendalynjones4576 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Mel O. wow, really, after I finish this video imma look up the new one&watch it.

  • @TiffanyMaryJean
    @TiffanyMaryJean 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1105

    *He’s quite likable and a tad charming while he’s been up for 5 days. I can’t imagine his personality sober and slept for 8hrs. Get sober my friend!!*

    • @SoilentGr33n
      @SoilentGr33n 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      I thought exactly the same thing. The dude is smart, funny, decent looking, and holy shit what?? Been up for 5 days WOW.

    • @TiffanyMaryJean
      @TiffanyMaryJean 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      @@SoilentGr33n the 3 videos he did within a month or so were insane. In a month he went from a relapsed addict who’s a Harvard grad with a city position making 6 figures who has a car and apartment in la. To a addict with a sex addiction, who’s spent most of his time on skid row looking for crack and hookers, missed work probably lost his job, spent all his money, sold his car for crack, was beat up and robbed, his dad won’t pay for his condo or give him money...just within a month! It’s very hard for me to understand since I’ve never been addicted to anything. I think In general it’s hard to understand how one can go so far down from where they once were. He’s went to 10-15 rehabs and still can’t hold his own money and can’t stay sober longer than 6 months. He has all the support in the works from family to friends but still his addiction is winning. I’m sorry but there’s a point where it seems like he just doesn’t want to stay sober. At what point does his family and friends walk away? This has been going on for 20 years. It’s gotta be exhausting for the ppl who love him.

    • @bobshenix
      @bobshenix 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Not exactly charming... he's forthright and has moments of lucidity but he's pretty neurotic IMO

    • @thomasgallegos2832
      @thomasgallegos2832 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@TiffanyMaryJean My brother has the same problem . He tries to stay off it. We have to take accountability although he is still a victim and that's why its so illegal .

    • @nunyabizwacks6711
      @nunyabizwacks6711 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@bobshenix agreed. far from "charming"

  • @byronwright801
    @byronwright801 3 ปีที่แล้ว +774

    He is so disgusted with himself but can't stop, addiction is a monster!

    • @monicabroussard840
      @monicabroussard840 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes !

    • @notimetowaste1254
      @notimetowaste1254 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yep, I could tell by his smile....🥴

    • @byronwright801
      @byronwright801 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Smiling faces........sometimes they lie😉

    • @elcid8889
      @elcid8889 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@notimetowaste1254 And I could tell for his desire of dominance over other victims (female addicts). Great guy, he's a okay! 😉

    • @-_oOtianaOo_-
      @-_oOtianaOo_- 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@byronwright801 I I agree 💯, because it could be a coping mechanism. I laugh when I am nervous/anxious and people may take it as I am flirting or whatever they may think, and really it is because I have anxiety and it is one of my coping mechanism.

  • @indiegamespotlite
    @indiegamespotlite 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    This is the only one of these I've ever watched all the way through. Somehow the pure genuineity of this guy is powerful and emotional enough to overpower the deep sadness and pain of the story he tells, and it makes me feel for him so much....what an amazing guy. Really hope he's getting better now

    • @777Revolutionary
      @777Revolutionary 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      It’s also one of the shortest lol

  • @carolinefarquhar8029
    @carolinefarquhar8029 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for giving us the opportunity to listen to this guy. I have learnt so much. Don't think I'll ever forget him. Please God he gets through this.

  • @gudgengrebe
    @gudgengrebe 3 ปีที่แล้ว +234

    This guy IS loveable ... he’s truthful, insightful and decent and totally honest .. what’s not to love about him?

    • @tianitra
      @tianitra 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      He is !!

    • @carleycowski
      @carleycowski 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      So true !

    • @mariebernier3076
      @mariebernier3076 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Yes. So true of a lot of people who don't love themselves.

    • @tianitra
      @tianitra 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      He can't see himself even with all his abilities and needs help with self esteem

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Something associated with November keeps him prisoner.

  • @joem6043
    @joem6043 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1080

    This guy just wanted to get all this out. He clearly feels very guilty about everything.

    • @nataliesteinhauer402
      @nataliesteinhauer402 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      crack is like a truth serum!

    • @user-jy2sj4ed4i
      @user-jy2sj4ed4i 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @Alan not sure addiction ever suddenly disappears

    • @kieran7011
      @kieran7011 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@user-jy2sj4ed4i it definitely doesn't

    • @kieran7011
      @kieran7011 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @Alan addiction never just suddenly goes away

    • @jeremywall7206
      @jeremywall7206 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Nobody is proud of it. Its a ball a chain that you are always ashamed of. But, he knows the why, and he is honest but he hasnt said the why yet. In his mind he knows the hang up, he wont reveal it, we never do, we learn to live with it without ever speaking it out load.

  • @billytubbs1635
    @billytubbs1635 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I absolutely love this guys honesty and I hope he’s doing well in life. That “don’t tell them out there” you can tell he was so ashamed…

  • @karlyncostello6902
    @karlyncostello6902 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I haven’t done crack for 15 years ,it was so hard to get off of.I am depressed and it has been crossing my mind more and more to drink or do crack just to feel a little better .Watching this was a godsend. That euphoria for a second is followed by days of regret and anxiety and nausea. God bless him

    • @spyder_33
      @spyder_33 ปีที่แล้ว

      I had an obsession for stimulants in general, but I've found crack way too quick of a high and went to snorting meth.
      Fortunately I've left that life behind but as we all (should) know, once an addict always an addict.

    • @almo33YO
      @almo33YO ปีที่แล้ว

      SSRIs work wonders

  • @Kat-ip5ex
    @Kat-ip5ex 3 ปีที่แล้ว +231

    This is heart breaking. My mother was a crackhead and literally threw her life away. Threw her kids away and died alone in a hotel room. This is what crack will do to you...it will make you throw away everything that really matters in your life. I pray this man is able to escape the cycle of addiction.

    • @Kat-ip5ex
      @Kat-ip5ex 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@2.0mhllala thank you. Everybody goes through some hardship, what matters is how you deal with it.

    • @fuckYouTubeBringBackDislikes
      @fuckYouTubeBringBackDislikes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @2dawgz i honestly don't think that crack cocaine can kill you alone.

    • @mrcontroversy222
      @mrcontroversy222 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@fuckTH-camBringBackDislikes it’s called a cocaine overdose......

    • @tinaashley7802
      @tinaashley7802 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@fuckTH-camBringBackDislikes your in denial then,any drug can kill

    • @tinaashley7802
      @tinaashley7802 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So sorry you lost your mum and had to go through this,thats heartbreaking,i hope you've got through it all and have made a good life for yourself,bless you 💝

  • @DrT2213
    @DrT2213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +544

    This is so unfortunate because he’s actually a nice looking man with intelligence to match. He also seems very sincere and kind hearted. Hoping for a full recovery for him so he can grasp the things in life he deserves.

    • @carolynnalvarez7032
      @carolynnalvarez7032 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Absolutely he's very sincere and cute. Hoping the best for him 🙏

    • @AIvey
      @AIvey 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Only thing I find out is that ones they hit the pipe...it's seem they can't get of this runaway train.

    • @DreadHeadCorey
      @DreadHeadCorey 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      She said he’s cute yeeeaahh he’s a good guy for sure seems like it

    • @stonejackballer9519
      @stonejackballer9519 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @The Real Confession - You know, it’s rather sad and honestly a problem that you and some of the other commenters are completely ignorant to the impact of what you are saying and how it may impact/effect viewers/readers of this content. Saying things like you did, verbatim - “So unfortunate” because he’s a “nice looking man with intelligence to match” and how he “seems very sincere and kind hearted” - although maybe true or nice, can really hurt someone else who may be dealing with similar issues but possibly doesn’t have those character traits! I mean is what you said to imply that if you’re not a “nice looking” person or “intelligent” that, those individuals aren’t just as deserving of help and the care/love people like you seem to have for someone who falls into a certain category. I really don’t feel as though I need to go into details but EVERYONE needs help and needs OUR support and LOVE. NOT JUST THE CUTE ONES OR THE INTELLIGENT ONES. And make no mistakes, just because someone looks a certain way…MEANS NOTHING! Ever heard of a wolf in sheeps clothing, I mean come on. Show LOVE to EVERYONE! EVERYONE NEEDS IT! ,..and LIFE IS SHORT! Sorry if I came across rude at all in this post but after watching this and reading these posts I was just appalled because it is just all to often where people get treated a certain way because of the way they look or sound or what credentials they hold. ALL WE HAVE IS TODAY, GIVE YOUR LOVE TO EVERYONE. If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading and also maybe you’ll start living your life through a bit of a different lens. …and not just you @The Real Confession and @Carolynn Alvarez - LOVE to ALL OF YOU. - Happy Tiger Year!

    • @stonejackballer9519
      @stonejackballer9519 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@AIvey 'o

  • @Nicklpud
    @Nicklpud 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Such a nice man, open and honest about his demons. Really hope he pulls through this

  • @randyGelectromusicwrldwide
    @randyGelectromusicwrldwide ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This guy is one of the best I've ever heard..... incredibly honest. Wow. God Bless this man please in all of his affairs.

  • @_.Sparky._
    @_.Sparky._ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +252

    Wow one of the best interviews. The man has a depth of understanding about this situation and is able to articulate his sense of utter despair with such honesty.

  • @shelby5t1
    @shelby5t1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +207

    I want him to win over crack. Such an honest and loveable soul.

    • @elcid8889
      @elcid8889 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      LMAO 🤣😆😂🤣

  • @martymcfywilliams5725
    @martymcfywilliams5725 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    he’s still so normal like. i’m not sure if it’s because he’s a functioning addict with lots of his life still or just hasn’t hit a total rock bottom but i hope he gets better. i love his personality and real/genuine composure, i can imagine him off drugs and he seems like he could have a great life with a wife and kids. all the best to him❤

  • @shannontilton6720
    @shannontilton6720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +147

    He literally is one of the most honest interviewees you have ever had he is giving you gut-level honesty all his toxicness is pouring out of him good video

    • @matthewazuh2180
      @matthewazuh2180 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      toxicity

    • @birdmandrugstories
      @birdmandrugstories 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@matthewazuh2180 Check out birdman drug stories on TH-cam too🦅

    • @bradley617
      @bradley617 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Except saying Harvard extension school is “Harvard”. It’s a certificate program not entrance requirements. And spending 15k a month bullshit... he would be homeless and couldn’t afford that on 6 figures. Not buying it at all

  • @THIIIIRSTY
    @THIIIIRSTY 3 ปีที่แล้ว +431

    The world has no idea how many of us "functioning addicts" blend almost effortlessly into the groups of people you see every day. I hope we all find out way out before we find our way underground. Best of luck to you, Patrick.

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I pray you soon find your way out. Don't give up on yourself.❤

    • @yogalyfe
      @yogalyfe 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Agreed.

    • @kyleculpepper798
      @kyleculpepper798 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yep

    • @shellabella8625
      @shellabella8625 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Sure that’s not denial? Be careful w that one.

    • @tessaanne1205
      @tessaanne1205 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes! I went thru that awful cycle where I would binge then try and walk back into life like everything was fine. Its the worst!!! Awful. I have years sober but the calling still hits. And I found something sober I love so when the calling hits, I shut everything down pass off my life responsibilities and do that thing. Which is binge TV and sleep

  • @Limitlessgal
    @Limitlessgal ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This interview genuinely helped me understand myself in a lot of ways. Those addictive urges and desires are a part of my lack of knowing how to fill that void or needing love

  • @luke8838
    @luke8838 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This was one of the best and most honest interviews I've ever seen on this channel or anywhere else. Hope you find your way Patrick you seem like the kind of guy who deserves it.

  • @unklezed2242
    @unklezed2242 3 ปีที่แล้ว +356

    I'll be 20 years sober on August 15 and I was worst of the worst. Good luck!

    • @emmap.7314
      @emmap.7314 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Congratulations on your sobriety! Here’s to 20 more years of sobriety for you! ❤️

    • @lisaholden7950
      @lisaholden7950 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Congrats!!! That is awesome!! ♥️

    • @littlehooch94
      @littlehooch94 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Congrats!!! I’m proud of you!

    • @angelamarymahoney
      @angelamarymahoney 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

    • @kadeejahunfiltered2254
      @kadeejahunfiltered2254 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Congratulations 🎊

  • @viralbuthow000
    @viralbuthow000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +229

    This man's brutal honesty makes me feel even more sorry for him.

    • @suezannemarie292
      @suezannemarie292 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      He's crying out for help

    • @jolandawalker7008
      @jolandawalker7008 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same. Makes him so likeable

    • @ericocanseyjr1406
      @ericocanseyjr1406 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@suezannemarie292 try keeping a secret charged up on coke . It’s near impossible.

  • @jesseondrumsjd
    @jesseondrumsjd 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    This is crazy! I know him. Went to treatment with him at teen challenge Brockton and played worship music with him. He is the smartest dude. This is his 4 days no sleep. When he’s firing all cylinders he’s on another level. He went to Harvard while he was working for the treatment center we went to and we would play at church he’s 3x a week. Normal people can’t handle that load and he never seemed stressed out.
    I hope he stays clean and we can hang out again

    • @jumpupanddown4God
      @jumpupanddown4God 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Jesse! I love you bro

    • @jesseondrumsjd
      @jesseondrumsjd 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jumpupanddown4God miss you man. Hope you’re doing well. Brad will update me from time to time. We still hangout and go on vacations together.

    • @lovealways729
      @lovealways729 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I agree, I think, he might also find it quite suffocating to be in this society with his intelligence both emotional and other... I used to feel the same! I am sober only a month :(. From what I hear, he is more into power, he is more into the rush and feeling of power.... that is quite addictive...

  • @jasonq111
    @jasonq111 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    His brutal honesty and articulation are amazing. He articulates his addiction so well. I hope he beats it bc he seems like a really sweet, intelligent guy.

  • @brittanyleblanc910
    @brittanyleblanc910 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    I’ve said it before on these videos and I’ll say it again, honesty is beautiful even when the truth is ugly. Patrick I see you. You’re still young, please read the comments here, re-visit with Mark, you can beat this. Sending you love and strength. I see you!

  • @jolenesmoove
    @jolenesmoove 3 ปีที่แล้ว +269

    I really appreciate people like him who are willing to go out to the wild frontiers of the human experience and report back to the rest of us. Hopefully this video will help others. Hopefully he finds some peace.

    • @BobbyGeneric145
      @BobbyGeneric145 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Gonzo journalism.

    • @hypnotoad885
      @hypnotoad885 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Just had to drop in 8 months later and say how much I love the quote "the wild frontiers of the human experience", what an awesome way to put that.

    • @stevee.7419
      @stevee.7419 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@BobbyGeneric145 This is definitely Gonzo journalism.

  • @antoniopalmero4063
    @antoniopalmero4063 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I feel so sad for Patrick, it’s something I went through in my 30s but managed to get out at age 40 following my fathers premature death . Patrick is clearly a great guy and I wish him the best for the future .

  • @LouieTzepher
    @LouieTzepher 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    His honesty, is almost child-like, hence why we are all rooting from him to beat this, just the honesty alone is admirable and we wish him well.

  • @Eileo50
    @Eileo50 3 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    He’s addicted to making himself not feel like himself it’s not only the crack the crack is just a symptom he will always indulge in things until he does work on himself. Admired his honesty if your honest your in with a chance of recovery I wish him well x

  • @brielleanyez7113
    @brielleanyez7113 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    I just want to give this man a hug and tell him everything is going to be alright. My husband died 11 years ago of a drug overdose. These are not bad people, they are sick, hurt, and in torment.

    • @TheJimburke
      @TheJimburke 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      you would probably be lying to him. i don't think hes going to be alright

    • @alicekranyk4173
      @alicekranyk4173 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@TheJimburke Watch his most recent video

  • @samwrought5650
    @samwrought5650 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I can relate when he said I want other people to love me because I don’t love me. Thanks Patrick, it’s gonna be a hard road ahead stay strong. Coming from an addict myself.

  • @michaelax3025
    @michaelax3025 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    He’s honestly is unbelievable,what a amazing man

  • @LexLifeRaj
    @LexLifeRaj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    These videos are lessons in disguise, totally underrated, and should honestly be watched by many more people.

    • @nathanrobbins8976
      @nathanrobbins8976 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yo i Watch this .. often to stay sober no lie ..

  • @dimemega00
    @dimemega00 3 ปีที่แล้ว +616

    Mark: That will kill you
    Patrick: That would be a relief
    man.... heavy

    • @ReginaTrans_
      @ReginaTrans_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I wish I could take care of him 😖😖

    • @melissawycough34
      @melissawycough34 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Heart sinking...

    • @phoenixzappa7366
      @phoenixzappa7366 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Lots of people feel like that. I do.
      When you get older life sucks man. The system will crush you.

    • @bmarcus2367
      @bmarcus2367 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Deep asf

    • @prairiedawn7753
      @prairiedawn7753 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Death doesn’t always seem so sad when you are so emotionally exhausted

  • @ellectron_
    @ellectron_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Patrick, I hope that one day you find peace with yourself. Your communication style, your candor, your strong sense of morality, your clarity are all highly impactful. You are the kind of person who can really connect to others, and I feel like you’ve probably left more of a mark on the world than you realize. There is so much potential to do a lot of good for people just like you, just by continuing to be so honest. I hope to see your story become one of continued success

  • @briandennehy6380
    @briandennehy6380 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Think this interview more than any other I've seen really shows the power of addiction. He can see with clarity each and every time that when he takes that hit everything will royally go to shit. But still the pull of the addiction is stronger. How can people say addiction isn't a disease when you see an interview like this

  • @banterbabe
    @banterbabe 3 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    This is one of the best interviews I’ve watched on this channel he was totally transparent as well as funny he’s a good guy deep down but just lacks self confidence and self belief bless him !!

  • @FitGalAbi
    @FitGalAbi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +432

    this guy is EXACTLY like how my ex was with cocaine. the speech and body language mannerisms, the tendencies, the fantasies. the only difference is that Patrick has the awareness to understand and articulate reasons why he does what he does. this helped me sort of understand my ex and empathize for the first time.

    • @masonsobel366
      @masonsobel366 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Move on he’s with a new hoe

    • @nicolejuarez5670
      @nicolejuarez5670 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@masonsobel366 God dayumn that escalated quickly. 🤣 🤣

    • @masonsobel366
      @masonsobel366 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@nicolejuarez5670 fr idk what came over me tbh

    • @pinky882
      @pinky882 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Patrick's description of his crack experiences, especially the sexual parts are extremely accurate to my cocaine experiences. I abused coke heavily for a few years and that's exactly how I felt every time. I also lost a job on a three day coke bender after I had been off coke for almost 10 years, then one night at the bar someone gave me a bump and a free couple of grams... that was that.

    • @mamabear1211
      @mamabear1211 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@alanw4935 yes technically but you can’t compare the 2…
      Cocaine is more social, crack is more of a “shut the blinds and lock the doors” kinda high

  • @Corninthesky
    @Corninthesky 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Damn. The main mental health problem I’ve dealt with throughout my short life so far has been self-hate. I’m doing a lot better than I was a few years ago, but stories like this definitely connect with me. Unchecked, thoughts of little self-worth can destroy someone. I hope this guy gets what he needs

  • @Alienspecies635
    @Alienspecies635 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The fact he’s on day 4 and he’s still able to function and talk is impressive. This guy sober must be as sharp as they come
    Put it this way this guy the guy has a government job and is honest to them about smoking crack and still has his job. That shows how valuable he is. The fact he’s so honest to everyone too shows he’s a truthful honest guy he’s just crazy addicted.
    His mannerisms remind me of that feeling of taking too many milligrams of adderal and staying up for a few days without being able to eat

  • @sunglassesron9464
    @sunglassesron9464 2 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    This guy has displayed more honesty in 32mins than I have seen in a long time! I wish him well with his addiction and life!

  • @KynaThisKynaThat
    @KynaThisKynaThat 3 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    He seems like a good guy, I hope he overcomes his addiction.

  • @envision_embody_become
    @envision_embody_become ปีที่แล้ว +4

    “The disease of addiction means you have to you, like, it’s going to happen. It’s not if. It’s when. That’s the disease. That’s real addiction.”
    So. Fucking. Real.

  • @ludalove4033
    @ludalove4033 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Mark has said Patrick got married several months ago❤❤❤ and is sober !!!

  • @herelieskittythomas3726
    @herelieskittythomas3726 3 ปีที่แล้ว +397

    TELLING ON MYSELF WAS THE ONLY THING THAT GOT ME SOBER. Yes, I'm yelling.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @Patrick Bateman I understand brolami. Ima tell you the answer, and it's the truth. Idk if you believe in God, but he's real and he knows everything about you. Ask Jesus to help you and he will. I've been stuck in the same cycle and I keep making the same mistake OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER. 15 times now with the adderall this last year. And I'm finally about to get out of it.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @Patrick Bateman Jesus will sit their with you and go through the pain with you, he's been doing it with me. Literally just be like "Jesus/God, show me you're real, and tell him you need help, and he will I promise you.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @Patrick Bateman It might take a while and be a long process, but little by little you'll be able to grow out of it. Look for narcotics anonymous or alcohol anonymous.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Patrick Bateman This is coming from a long time agnostic/atheist also btw, until only a couple years ago.

    • @Emorydawn830
      @Emorydawn830 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      ME TOO!!

  • @annsgal2025
    @annsgal2025 2 ปีที่แล้ว +116

    This interview is worthy of being converted into a documentary about crack addition. I learnt so much about this tragic disease and how it leaves the addict helpless. This deserves to be elevated to the level of educational material .

    • @annamorgan5909
      @annamorgan5909 ปีที่แล้ว

      Most definitely should be educational material 💯💯

    • @amberridley4222
      @amberridley4222 ปีที่แล้ว

      I Agree with you

    • @dustyjking
      @dustyjking ปีที่แล้ว

      Very well said.

    • @aleksiwilson2295
      @aleksiwilson2295 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      it would make a good doco but this is guy is not your average crack addict, at least not where I live

  • @waakdfms2576
    @waakdfms2576 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I'm overcome by Patrick's sheer honesty and ability for self reflection....really something to witness. I watched the latest video showing his recovered self....what a miracle. Thank you, Mark and Patrick, for posting these videos for the world to see. I expect it to make a bigger difference than you will ever know. Much love to you both and to all of the SWU community.

  • @6969DonRolando
    @6969DonRolando 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    i am so impressed by the honesty of all those amazing people in your interviews. thank you for this insight. it opens my heart! i can feel them.

  • @msaunsha
    @msaunsha 3 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    This is a very honest, and highly intelligent guy who would be able to soar in life, if he only could learn his worth and kick this horrible addiction. Sending prayers up for you, Patrick. I’m rooting for you, and I’m sure many others viewing this are as well. Thank you for being so transparent with us. I hope it helps get you on a journey to recovery. Don’t give up. 💗

  • @lams1013
    @lams1013 3 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    Attractive in so many ways, but so lost...doesn’t see his potential. Love and light to you! ❤️

    • @higirlhigh
      @higirlhigh 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      lams1013 I was thinking the same :(

    • @elmairkdfienfbfmdk
      @elmairkdfienfbfmdk 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah he so beautiful 4 me

    • @bobshenix
      @bobshenix 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He's too busy being disgusted with himself to see his potential!!

  • @elle_aye112
    @elle_aye112 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Hey man, I hope you get better. Your self awareness is off the charts. Rooting for you.

  • @jodieeast5413
    @jodieeast5413 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    So real, honest, intelligent.... just a man with a terrible addiction. Hoping you will beat this Patrick. One of the best addiction interviews I have seen.

  • @randomshortz17
    @randomshortz17 2 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    My man is jonesing hard. If youve never been on a crack binge, you dont know how hard it really is for him to sit there and have a deep conversation with one thing on his mind. I couldnt have done it

    • @ekaekemini3693
      @ekaekemini3693 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Extremely hard

    • @johnhelton3826
      @johnhelton3826 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      why is he moving that way? is it nervous system damage?

    • @acow9966
      @acow9966 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@johnhelton3826 he's tweaking out dummy

    • @mdhcccc
      @mdhcccc 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@johnhelton3826no lmao

  • @brettbanta2100
    @brettbanta2100 3 ปีที่แล้ว +574

    Man, I want this guy's job, where you can miss 6 weeks of work on a crack binge, and come back to work like nothing happened. What a gig

    • @jets8991
      @jets8991 3 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      Especially a city job!!! Wtf!!!

    • @likearitual
      @likearitual 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Mind blowing

    • @MayorMcheese12
      @MayorMcheese12 3 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      It's probably good educational background

    • @midnighttokertruthseeker2178
      @midnighttokertruthseeker2178 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      I've had a job like that where i would get all fuxked up on pills and evertything above for about a month an some straight then just show back up

    • @danevertt3210
      @danevertt3210 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@midnighttokertruthseeker2178 doing what???

  • @Kelly-518
    @Kelly-518 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    He is by far my favorite! High or not. The way he talks, the honesty and how he processes everything...it's so relatable. He holds my interest where I could listen to Patrick for hours.

  • @keirrennie7678
    @keirrennie7678 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Man when he said he knows exactly what’s gonna happen really hit home for me, absolutely horrible being in that position

  • @waynemontpetit8181
    @waynemontpetit8181 3 ปีที่แล้ว +376

    Anyone that doesn't believe in the disease model of addiction needs to watch this.
    NO ONE would do this over and over again if it were just bad choices.

    • @anthonyberardi8904
      @anthonyberardi8904 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @Maximus Meridius you’re the most ignorant person in the world if you believe that.

    • @anthonyberardi8904
      @anthonyberardi8904 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Maximus Meridius I guess you’ve never been dopesick before throwing up and shitting your pants.

    • @drewjason1992
      @drewjason1992 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @maximus meridius way to speak the truth, to many people are fooled into thinking this is a disease.

    • @drewjason1992
      @drewjason1992 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@anthonyberardi8904 This comment proves you do not understand what you're talking about, being dope sick from having used has nothing to do with addiction being seen as a disease or illness. Im telling you young one read the book addiction is a choice then come back and talk.

    • @anthonyberardi8904
      @anthonyberardi8904 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@drewjason1992 well it doesn’t matter to me what you think about the subject. I know who I am. Been doing subs everyday for the last 8 or 9 years and I’m only gonna live once so I want to feel good and be happy as much as possible. Life’s too short to be miserable lol

  • @dr.richblackman
    @dr.richblackman 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    WITHOUT A DOUBT THE MOST facinating character yet AND IVE SEEN THEM ALL, WE NEED AN UPDATE. BE WELL PATRICK YOU GOT THIS BUDDY YOU GOT THIS

    • @Tiny86
      @Tiny86 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I really hope he makes it ❤️

  • @sydnaps1995
    @sydnaps1995 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I hope we get another interview from him. I appreciate his honesty so much.

  • @FOBW
    @FOBW ปีที่แล้ว +56

    UPDATE on Patrick: NO, he's not dead. He's clean and sober ( almost 7 months). He likes to golf, a lot. He's living a decent life.

    • @Alienspecies635
      @Alienspecies635 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      How do you know? A friend of mine got clean off heroin and started golfing all the time lol

    • @redtobertshateshandles
      @redtobertshateshandles ปีที่แล้ว

      He plays golf. He's dead.

    • @FOBW
      @FOBW ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@redtobertshateshandles Unless he died in the last 24 hours, he's still alive. I saw him yesterday when he celebrated one year of continuous sobriety.

    • @southphillylilly
      @southphillylilly ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@FOBW how is he now ?? August 2023

    • @elizabethroberts8588
      @elizabethroberts8588 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      He is now 2 years sober!! There’s a new Soft White Underbelly interview with him. He looks and sounds great! ❤️

  • @brianacunningham11
    @brianacunningham11 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    He's an extremely intelligent, kind, honest, attractive guy. This is so heartbreaking.

    • @rsohlich1
      @rsohlich1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hard drugs are brutal. Sad too.

  • @NotRKelly.
    @NotRKelly. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Such an honest, gifted, and attractive human being

  • @plaztikexplosives5953
    @plaztikexplosives5953 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Such a tortured soul. Some of the most intelligent, incredibly gifted minds I've had the honor to know have also been so internally torn to ribbons and self destructive. As an addict with a mere 2.5 years free I pray he can claw his way back. At some point he's going to want to get clean and stay that way more than anything else in the world.

  • @cameemz
    @cameemz 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    So proud to hear you're clean, Patrick. You're awesome thanks so much for doing these interviews, you're helping a lot of people by sharing your story.

  • @lotusgoddess94
    @lotusgoddess94 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Patrick reminds me of my husband. He’s an engineer too and cracked from stress and has been trying to figure stuff out. Patrick there is a woman out there who will LOVE you and meet your needs but you have to get better first! You have so much potential and are clearly intelligent. Work a program and get back into life!