The labor of me. Me, me, me, me,me... oh and me. Me, me, me. Did you notice me? Look at that, it's not about me, I'm great for not making it about me..me,me,me. Look over here, me, me, me, me. Society, me, me, me, me, me. Aren't I great. My labor.
Why are you reporting this video? [ ] It's annoying or not interesting [X] This video depicts me and I don't like it [ ] I think it shouldn't be on TH-cam [ ] It's Spam
Even when you said this ended on a negative note, i do think it ended on a happy one because you recognized this harmful way of thinking and living and are now sharing it with us and trying to better your quality of life, thank you for that
Holy shit in this video you've put words to what i've been struggling with! I am a visual artist, educator and person with side hustles and I feel like I'm always "on" all the freaking time. I just got Anno 1800 and the amount of guilt I've felt playing and the set of rules and requirements I've put on myself to "earn" some game time is ridiculous. Last weekend I was freaking out about taking time away from working to do a necessary home improvement project because having an up-kept home isn't something directly related to earning money. Honestly I feel emotional after watching this video because I feel so "seen" by your words. Thank you for this, it really means a lot to me right now. I'm actually creating a painting right now that deals with this very topic - I'll @ you on twitter when I'm finished :)
Coldcrashpictures just did a very similar video about the danger of fetishizing suffering as some kinda rite of passage for an artist, like a backwards logic that since growth requires pain if you're in pain you certainly must be growing. Mood of the era huh?
I love the cuts in this video, the way you let audio from the next clip come in over the video from the previous clip. It let the emotion from the end of each statement leave more of an impact on me. Nice editing!
Your videos shock me from my sleepy TH-cam trance, then invite me to start feeling/reacting/thinking again. I agree that your type of labor is asymmetrical; and I assume the reward is too. People can derive tons of enjoyment from what you considered to be an unfulfilling project. Passion, time, and effort can't be mixed into a foolproof formula for success (a word I'm not sure how to define, anyways. I'd love for you to explore that topic in a future video). I also appreciate your honesty, and decision to keep your pauses/moments of contemplation in the final cut. It reminds me you don't have it all figured out either.
This and the transition video (which I haven't finished the godamn sub) are some of the most important videos of my life. As they speak SO directly to my experience as an alive human being
rerewatching this, and it continues to be incredible. as another constant thinker and writer, it's so nice to be reminded that my invisible work is just as much labour as my visible work!
With regards rest, there's been some experimental research recently that also shows that sleep specifically concretizes our skills. You get a little better at a thing while you're awake and practicing it, but then you go to sleep, and when you wake up, having not practiced at all, you're better than you were when you stopped practicing.
I started typing and realised I was paraphrasing things that you said and the last thing the world needs is another man repeating what a woman has said but rephrasing a couple of words. So, instead of that bullshit, this is a good and on point video and I really like it. I hope your move is as painless as possible.
Oh wow, great video as always. I’m a medical student, so I’m not making anything that other people are consuming like content creators do, but I definitely understand what you’re talking about with being “terminally online”. I’m glad to hear it’s not just me. I’ve started leaving home just to escape the cycle of “I want to play vidya, no I can’t play vidya, let me do reddit/TH-cam/twitter instead” Love your stuff! (Also you’re the one who got me into the McElroy brothers, so I’m forever grateful to you for that)
Holy hell, this was EVERYTHING I needed to hear right now. Thank you. I've been struggling in that same vortex of guilt and shame - needing to find time to relax to recharge, but needing to produce or effectively use my time, and not being able to produce anything because I'm so tired and empty, but not being able to even effectively relax because I feel each greasy second slipping through my tired fingers - and, whoops, 6 months have gone by and I haven't made a video.Time to sadly write to my Patrons, hat in hand... again. Again, thank you. This isn't something I find myself able to talk about publicly - even with those closest to me - in part because of a lack of words, but mostly due to the fact that it's blood in the water. It's weakness. Admitting I need to stop (even for just a short time) is a form of failure. It's discrediting. It takes almost no effort for those who offer advice to flip from "why don't you just make something" to "why are you even doing this"? And having to constantly justify my desire to make videos to my loved ones over and over again would be straw that breaks this camel's back.
Powerful thoughts and powerful words, there are few in every generations that do think and feel like this and even fewer who able to to into words this eloquently. Thank you.
I'm here from the Matrix sequels video and i'm going to watch all of your content now because you are reading my brain waves and finishing my ideas for me and showing me things I haven't started to imagine yet. Just letting you know, thanks so much and I hope you're having a great fkn day!
Great video, Sarah. Thank you! You described that feeling of guilt over not being productive all the time so well. It is a problem. Made me feel a lot less alone to hear you talk about it. Love your nail polish, btw! 💅
I found your channel a few weeks ago and it's really filling the void of me having No Queer Theory/Postmodern Theory Classes this semester. Your pace is excellent, even for someone with the world's worst ADHD. I love how your content still feels like a discussion even though you're largely presentational. Thank you so much for what you do, and I can't wait to start keeping up with you more regularly!!
I've been thinking about this kind of stuff a lot. I've been trying to be a writer for twenty years or so, and it's only in the past few years that I've felt like I'm not only good at it but getting recognized for it, to the point where I could go pro if I want. If I'd known back when I was a teenager that I wouldn't get anything published for literally decades, would I have spent so many hours at it as I did thinking that every new story idea could be The One that got published? But if I didn't put in all those years, I could never have gotten this good at it. And I've enjoyed it too. I'm honestly never happier than when I'm writing. But I also know that I can only do it when I'm a bit distracted. I have to get involved in something else, and while I'm doing something else, I get that spark of inspiration and I have to go write about it. A writer can never be *just* a writer, or they won't have anything to write about. This video really echoes a lot of that sentiment. It's why, even though I could go pro as a writer if I wanted, I don't want to. Not right now. I'm about to finish a degree so I can work in the public sector, and from that space, I hope to find more to write about. I will still be writing. I may even publish a book or two. Even if that happens, I don't see myself going full-time. If I do, I'll always have something else - gardening, volunteering, spiritual practice, family - that will probably take up more of my actual hours than writing. Because otherwise what the hell am I going to write about? I think I've gotten a good handle on the balance and not feeling guilty for not working. Play is work too. Rest is work too. It's all part of being alive. Good luck with the move! Thanks for this video. I'll be showing it to some people who I think need to see it.
I think a lot of people consider your decision to pursue other things as a "half-commitment." I come across that attitude a lot when I say I want to be a choreographer. I mean, I should be at the studio all the time, right? Let me stress that training is absolutely necessary. But I think there are very valuable outside experiences that I can channel into what I make. And others that will improve/change who I am, and may or may not affect my work, but will undoubtedly impact my life as a whole. What I'm trying to say is- I think you've got a good perspective. I hope your love for writing (gardening, volunteering, spiritual practice, and family) lives as long as you do.
I think all artists are going to find that this video resonates with them on a fundamental level. For a long time, I never thought my art was really worth anything if I wasn't selling it. I'd keep trying to find "marketable" ideas for my art so I could start selling it but I always got stuck halfway through with burnout. I could never quite figure out why it didn't work, and I was always comparing myself to other people. Only recently was I able to find something that combined my crafty sensibilities with capitalism, and I found worth when it started working for me. At the same time however, I have this nagging thought in the back of my head that it isn't what I am "supposed" to do with my time. Being reminded that it's still work is incredibly reassuring.
Tristan talked about this on a stream that people often ask him to stream his DnD games but that he wants to keep that as a genuine real life interaction and not turn that into an interaction with his audience and that gave me a lot to think about.
oh my god the whole thing about how people just cannot see pieces of modern art that they dont like without being extremely entitled about the whole is akjsdhaskjdh ive been trying to put this into words for years now i love this video so much
God I swear your videos make me cry so often. (note: sorry for the really long comment) To put in my 2 cents about it, I am a very small creator. I am a teenager, I do art, and sometimes put that art online, and sometimes I talk to people and make friends. Most of the time that's it, that's what I put into the world, and I am working to some extent almost every time in go online to make people hear the things I do. And even if I am a very small creator, I still get a lot of the pressure of the things you said in this video. When I go online or text people or socialise, there's always the part of me that's saying "You could be doing drawing right now. You've got unfinished projects and things to give to people, you should be working." And sometimes, that part of me telling me to do that is helpful, as it gets me to create things, but sometimes I just get stuck in the great loop of indecision about what I should be doing. It feels like there's no way to be satisfied in what you're doing, no matter what you do. I think I have also made the realisation recently that I am always working, always putting things together, always thinking of things to say to people or even just the next tweet I'm going to make. I am also working on myself all the time, keeping my feelings in check, and making sure I don't stuff up. And all those things are tiring, they're really fucking tiring to do all the time (and sometimes being autistic can make it even harder). *sigh* I don't know where this comment/small essay is going, so I'm just going to conclude. I agreed with all your points in this, and some of it hit real fucking close to home about the weight of creating things. Thank you and good job on this video!
I think I needed to hear this. I have been trying to write novels for years, but never can seem to get a plot that sticks and grows. I feel guilty for when I could be writing or working, but I know if I try to force the idea, I know I'll burn it out. Much love for your art, Sarah, enjoy the break!
When teaching academic writing, I always used to point out that when they were doing research for labour and the 8 hour work day, they also did research on intellectual labour as well as physical. It was updated in the 60s, where it is pointed out that more than 3 hours of doing is the maximum you can do, precisely because you always thinking. The other 2 hours of work is that walking away and processing. Yet this research is never engaged with. 80% of my doctoral thesis was thinking, but the best idea I had? During the weeks I took off.
This was such an incredible video that I had to leave a comment in support, and I will probably watch it again to really comprehend its message and internalize it! I hope you get the restful break you need Sarah! In the meantime I’ll be catching up on your podcast, it’s so great! Also to drive home how much I wanted to support this video with my praise, Google required me to make a TH-cam channel to comment, and I’ve been stubbornly holding out for over a year now because I didn’t wanna make a channel (and then feel stupidly obligated to put things there or maintain it in some way). It all ties back in lol. But today I said screw it, because I wanna be supportive of Sarah’s channel and video!
Don't feel obligated... I started checking out the channels of people who comment after I started getting serious about my channel and discovered that like 99% of the channels on here are completely empty. Hell, there are probably more channels created by neo-nazis to troll people's comments than there are active channels posting comments. :P
What a great video. I want to say something clever and deep, but the only words I can form right now are just how good it felt to hear this from someone else. Thank you for this. ♥
I always thought of you, Sarah, as a thinker (think: philosopher, thinker, sage, analyst, scientist) rather than an artist (musician, fiction writer, actor). That is what I experience watching your stuff: deep thought, critical outlook, analyses, ideas.
I find myself usually stuck in that guilt cycle and I end up feeling unproductive and uncreative. everything I consume, content-wise, then goes into the "how can I make money out of this?" box. I can't find a job it seems, so I have that pressure, but I miss the days when I used to draw for myself. I hope I can get my passion back. thank you for making this video. I needed it. two days ago I finally started to watch videos about astronomy and space just for the fun of it and I kinda felt relieved. my field is fashion, so I tend to step away from it to avoid being too influenced and to take some time off, but it's usually just to distract myself. those space videos were not a distraction though and I'm happy I watched them.
I don't do art professionally, but as an academic that mostly does my research on my computer from home, I definitely feel the pressure to constantly do work whenever i have free time, and it's definitely exhausting. Also just a generally really good video, love you Sarah!
hey! thanks for the personal attack! i thought abt this some time ago too and tbh i think a lot of the people who go "oh i could do that" and dont get the asymmetrical value of art probably wouldnt complain if there wasn't money attached to it since a lot of that kind of stuff seen by them ends up being bought for and well, capitalism dont value labour good and they feel shafted for it i guess
THIS VIDEO IS SO INSPIRING THANK YOU !!!!!!! IM GOING TO SEND IT TO MY BEST FRIEND WHO IS DOING A THESIS FILM & THEY'RE FREAKING OUT, BUT THEY'RE DOING SO GOOD AND IT'S SO AMAZING !!!!!! thanks so much the labor you do is not invisible to people who know what to look for
I feel like this is something I will have to return to. One of those good videos that I won't understand all at once, now, but will get more from when I watch it again and again.
It was really important for me to hear this tonight, right this moment. Got home from game night with my sister and have been feeling guilty for not utilizing my ADD meds enough today to get a bunch of my voice acting work done. I planned to do it when I got home, but I'm so exhausted, I watched this video instead, and I'm really, really glad I did. It's a weight from my shoulders. You did a great job, and I hope you're able to just feel okay and have fun, guilt-free, as often as possible!
My 11th grade AP English teacher is the person who first told me to stop stressing out about procrastinating and just enjoy it, and that's good because AP English was probably the hardest point in my life and I needed Skyrim at that time to stay sane.
I legitimately do not understand modern art, but I know that doesn't mean it is bad. Sometimes I just sit and watch people talk about modern art like "huh." It's interesting being the only non-creative type in a room full of creative types, since I'm a portraiture artist surrounded by people who actually do more than look at things and go "aha! I will recreate that thing exactly!"
This video reminded me of a video by Loading Ready Run, that I can't find, but basically, there's a girl, and she sees the guy going through his stuff, until he pulls out a glowing white orb. She asks what it is, and he happily tells her that it is the last thing in his life that makes him happy, that he hasn't monetized yet. Smash cut to him reviewing it in a TH-cam video. LRR is a channel where people basically just talk about any nerdy thing that could possibly make them happy, so it basically repaints all of their content as kind of an existential nightmare.
You of course didn’t know about the pandemic or anything, but this video very well applies to the way one experiences college during this. My college got rid of the mid-semester breaks, opting for a slightly later start and slightly early end to the semester with, in this spring, two “off days” they would give us randomly. This year has been one, long dragging, draining, haltless dredge through heavy schoolwork. Particularly with (potential) ADHD, I have been stuck lagging behind everything and yet yearning to do the work. Stuck in my bed trying to get my energy back yet sitting, drained, empty yet having done nothing. Now it is the end of the year nearly, and I likely won’t pass a very important class-I barely passed the last one. I can’t be happy for anything, I can’t experiment because of the fucking plague, but I can’t work like I should be either. I’m stuck between these two things, I can’t be any more lazy and restful.
i am so glad i finished college before the pandemic, it sounds like an utter nightmare from start to finish. best of luck, you'll get through it one way or another
Oh my god, you've put into words exactly how I feel about doing the work. Dx I am two weeks away from graduating after working on my Bachelors for 6 years, 28 years old, and I feel like I need to immediately get a good job and start doing freelancing in my free time. Luckily my husband has been really sweet and has told me to take a full month to just play some video games and not worry about getting a job right away. I want to be able to give myself the same permission. Thank you for this video, it helps me feel like I can give myself that permission.
ahhhhhh you're so right and it's such a weird feeling when everything you love and enjoy can become some kind of work. It's so important to enjoy things for their own sake, but it's so compelling to turn everything into creative work somehow!!! sometimes you just gotta lie in the flowers!!!!!!! (the flowers are your youtube videos and I'm lying in 'em rn)
I think it's sometimes even more of a struggle when you're doing whatever creative thing you do alongside a full time real world job. You tell yourself that, because you have less free time, you need to spend more of it doing the thing.
Definitely. I completely burned myself out as a pianist during my maths degrees, though I'd been aware for a long time that there's a risk of getting sucked into the competitiveness of both areas.
When I was first getting into D&D, I tried to make it a stream for the very reasons you mentioned. I didn't feel like I could justify my interest in this new hobby unless I was monetising it somehow. But tbh it hurt my love for it somewhat, and playing online was actually not my jam. So, I made the distinct decision that at least in my current moment, for the foreseeable future, I want my RPG stuff to be only a thing I intentionally do for fun with me and my friends, and not give into the temptation to make my game a podcast or a web series or anything else.
i was distracted by the music, i kept thinking "jeez this is so familiar. i can't put my finger on it" every 30 seconds. then i checked the description and saw june's name and i was like O SHIT!!! i haven't listened to her stuff in years!!! i was freakin obsessed with "hope against hope" and "thank you" ten years ago! wow... gotta go buy those albums again......... so that's my story about how you reminded me how good june's music is, but also i need to watch your entire video again because apparently i have the world's worst one-track mind and i got distracted from the meat of the video.
Oh boy, this video hits home. This is a wonderfully woven reminder, thank you. I find it unsettlingly ironic that I’ve been drawing nearly my entire life, and had a near unquenchable zest for it as a kid, but since my teenage years when art suddenly had to become my career choice, I’ve spent more time worrying about how much I’m not drawing than actual time drawing. I’m in my late 20’s now and I’m physically and mentally unable to draw like I used to. Capitalism is a hell of a drug.
Oh my god, this video hits really close at home. I put a lot of time into my videos and I actually mostly stopped playing games or doing other fun activities because I feel really guilty whenever I'm not writing or editing.
I'm in a bit of a unique situation where I simultaneously got a degree in an artistic field, and another in a more technical field. I've finished the program now, and besides the greater employability and salary from the technical degree, one of the big factors that has pushed me towards a more technical career with a 9-5 schedule has been this idea of finally being able to check out from work. Like, I'll be able to leave a building, and do what I want with the time that I have and not have that nagging feeling that I'm wasting my time. I'm still going to keep up my artistic pursuits, but I feel like I can go at my own pace and focus more on what I like instead of always doing things that I can use to advance myself as an artist. You are spot on about how sometimes you just need to walk away from something to let your mind rest, I've felt that very frequently. Another thing I've noted (and this might be because my art is performative) is that there's a difference in how I feel after an unproductive day of technical vs artistic work. If I'm feeling a little off one day, I can still get something done in my technical work, even if I'm not working as fast. But with artistic work, the quality of the work is more tied to my current state of being. So if I'm just not feeling my best, I won't perform as well as I know that I can, which makes the whole pursuit feel very frustrating and discouraging for that whole day.
oh my gosh i haven't finished the video yet but you've just summed up my entire work ethic and anxieties and im just !!!! makes me wanna die !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So true that nurses are the ones who actually do things. Doctors diagnose, prescribe, and make decisions, but they rely on nurses to physically do most things (other than surgery I suppose).
Your work on this video really paid off (it's an excellent work) I hope it paid off monetarily too! A suggestion for another video essay, limited to its proper role as labor that doesn't consume the rest of your life, of course: your thoughts on "On Writing".
Believe me, this is not just a problem for Millennials. I started writing movie reviews for my own websites years ago and I still torture myself over what movies I can watch based on whether I can generate opinions and thoughts about them or not. If I end up watching something utterly boring and middle of the road it often makes me quite angry because I just wasted valuable time.
oof, yea, this mindset is something i struggle a lot with in my daily life and creative work, learning, and improvement and it’s really hard to move away from that kind of cycle of regret of not doing, but i know that i want and need to make that change in the way that i look at what i do and what it means about me
Something that could help you with this is to make either physical or digital planning resources like mind maps or notes or skeleton drafts. I think that having a way to visualise the work that is being done makes it harder to rationalise that the work hasn't happened at all
great video, Sarah. gives me a lot to think about. one thing that stood to me is how precise and accurate your description of your procrastination was to mine? and i am, first of all, not doing work anything like yours - i am a college student in stem living off my parents. and i always thought this cycle of dissatisfyingly wasting my time was a product of my depression. i never really conceptualized it as a millenial thing. even with my awareness of myself and of my problems with the system i didn't fully make the connection as to why exactly my mental illness manifests the way it does - sure my parents contributed with how they treated me, but there's a bigger picture here i haven't let myself think too hard about yet.
i've gotten myself in to a place where no matter how much i come away from a problem i can't work out how to progress when i get back and worked up a negative association to trying to start anything 'productive' or leaving something 'not productive' i do still manage to start for more than a day or two
In the book 'Why We Sleep' Mathew Walker suggests that our brains run simulations of the issues we have during the day, without the drain that waking thought has, whilst we sleep. He talks about various scientific tests he has done to try to prove it, it's a very interesting read and might be useful for anyone grappling with the topics brought up in this video in their personal lives, especially if you also feel you have an abnormal sleeping pattern.
In the context of this video sleep is a part of the essential "stepping away" process. Notice that sometimes it's hardest to fall asleep when you still haven't stepped away in the evening.
WE ARE NOT WORTHY This is everything I have been thinking and feeling and you've put it into words PERFECTLY. This is Such Good Shit. And i feel like the ending is outside of "happy" and "unhappy" because it's a call to action, and those i think are happiness-neutral (to a certain extent). (Honestly I will probably embroider it at some point because it is So. True.) (also your shirt is fucking great)
I am in this situation now that I was overworking SO BADLY last few months (I draw commissions) that I never let myself rest until I have my work done so I could have enough money for my bills and food, but the thing is - I was so stressed that I bought so much shit just to feel better, that I had to work even more. And of course, I never did anything for myself, my health is still awful and my body is falling apart, and I hated drawing at the end of that so badly, that I didn’t want to open my laptop for a week when I decided that I have to stop. I need time for myself. I do now everything I wanted to do for the last 3 years of work non stop, i bake a lot, I sculpt, I walk a lot, I train myself, I’m planning to saw and do a lot of makeup soon too. And I realized I don’t need that much money and I can make myself happy just by resting and doing what I feel like doing, even though I don’t have a schedule, so it always feels like I’m working or have to work. It was hard to start doing anything for myself, I still can’t draw what I want, but I did so much stuff that reminded me that I’m a human being after all and I have my own ideas and can have fun and care about myself. I hope it will be possible to make my prices higher soon, so I could do that more (since I’m just spending all my last saved money to do that, I can’t do that all the time) It really helped me and I hope if you are reading this and you are in the same situation - you should try that too. Money will always come back, but your health and time will not, so don’t loose yourself over something that you don’t really need
Also.. I want to create my own comic for a three years already, I have a most of the plot and characters, but it’s so hard to finish it and start writing and drawing. Is there anyone who can encourage me with their journey of creating something for too long? ;w;
Good luck with the move! I would say I'm curious about your take on the Homestuck Epilogues, but having only finished Meat so far and not being entirely sure how anyone I know has already gone through all of both, I don't want to put any pressure on that. Instead I'll just say I hope your day's good, and you experience the minimum of stress during the month off.
Hmmm.... Maybe it *wasn't* a happy note to end the video on, but I liked it. I like a lot of your videos because some of them feel like calls to action. Not necessarily in the same way as this one does("dismantle the harmful ways you think about your own work in order to be a healthier and happier person and help others do the same and also so crapitalism doesn't win") but they do inspire me to think deeply about the topics and related topics, which I think counts. A call to think about these things is still a call to *do something.* What i guess I'm trying to say is that ending a video on a happy note isn't necessary to have the video be good. I feel like a happy note might have felt insincere? But i can't really place my finger on why. But it feels like the same reason why that one Contrapoints video you covered(the name escapes me at the moment) would have felt insincere if it had had ended on a happy note. In any case, I really like this video, because the problems you've faced with burnout and anxiety around Not Working are problems I've also had. It's one thing to know I'm not alone, and another to hear it from someone else with the same problems.
@@mimmikibilly Yeah, I don't schedule myself either, I just have an idea when I wake up in the morning of what I'm going to work on and sometimes roughly how much of it I'd like to finish. And then there are days when all I want to do is work and I can't even get a half-hour in because of external factors. That happens a lot more since we took in some extended family who lost a house recently.
![A Video About Transitioning. [CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3PClMhVAQWg/mqdefault.jpg)
![A Video About Transitioning. [CC]](/img/tr.png)
![What I Learned Writing 50,000 Words of Homestuck Fanfiction [CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/2zfO7vG5pdw/mqdefault.jpg)
An equation for procrastination.
I need to do A.
But I *want* to do B.
So I will compromise and go on twitter.
LMAO 😐😭😭😭
if this ain't me...
The labor of me. Me, me, me, me,me... oh and me. Me, me, me. Did you notice me? Look at that, it's not about me, I'm great for not making it about me..me,me,me. Look over here, me, me, me, me. Society, me, me, me, me, me. Aren't I great. My labor.
Why are you reporting this video?
[ ] It's annoying or not interesting
[X] This video depicts me and I don't like it
[ ] I think it shouldn't be on TH-cam
[ ] It's Spam
Even when you said this ended on a negative note, i do think it ended on a happy one because you recognized this harmful way of thinking and living and are now sharing it with us and trying to better your quality of life, thank you for that
Holy shit in this video you've put words to what i've been struggling with! I am a visual artist, educator and person with side hustles and I feel like I'm always "on" all the freaking time. I just got Anno 1800 and the amount of guilt I've felt playing and the set of rules and requirements I've put on myself to "earn" some game time is ridiculous. Last weekend I was freaking out about taking time away from working to do a necessary home improvement project because having an up-kept home isn't something directly related to earning money. Honestly I feel emotional after watching this video because I feel so "seen" by your words. Thank you for this, it really means a lot to me right now. I'm actually creating a painting right now that deals with this very topic - I'll @ you on twitter when I'm finished :)
Coldcrashpictures just did a very similar video about the danger of fetishizing suffering as some kinda rite of passage for an artist, like a backwards logic that since growth requires pain if you're in pain you certainly must be growing. Mood of the era huh?
I love the cuts in this video, the way you let audio from the next clip come in over the video from the previous clip. It let the emotion from the end of each statement leave more of an impact on me. Nice editing!
Your videos shock me from my sleepy TH-cam trance, then invite me to start feeling/reacting/thinking again. I agree that your type of labor is asymmetrical; and I assume the reward is too. People can derive tons of enjoyment from what you considered to be an unfulfilling project. Passion, time, and effort can't be mixed into a foolproof formula for success (a word I'm not sure how to define, anyways. I'd love for you to explore that topic in a future video).
I also appreciate your honesty, and decision to keep your pauses/moments of contemplation in the final cut. It reminds me you don't have it all figured out either.
These were comforting words for me when the self doubt is getting heavier. Also, I loved the inclusion of the NonCompete clip!
i think i needed this, thank you
This and the transition video (which I haven't finished the godamn sub) are some of the most important videos of my life. As they speak SO directly to my experience as an alive human being
rerewatching this, and it continues to be incredible. as another constant thinker and writer, it's so nice to be reminded that my invisible work is just as much labour as my visible work!
With regards rest, there's been some experimental research recently that also shows that sleep specifically concretizes our skills. You get a little better at a thing while you're awake and practicing it, but then you go to sleep, and when you wake up, having not practiced at all, you're better than you were when you stopped practicing.
I started typing and realised I was paraphrasing things that you said and the last thing the world needs is another man repeating what a woman has said but rephrasing a couple of words. So, instead of that bullshit, this is a good and on point video and I really like it. I hope your move is as painless as possible.
Thank you. As a musician this video is exactly what I need right now.
You just keep knocking it out of the park with your videos, I actually get genuinely excited when you upload.
Oh wow, great video as always. I’m a medical student, so I’m not making anything that other people are consuming like content creators do, but I definitely understand what you’re talking about with being “terminally online”. I’m glad to hear it’s not just me.
I’ve started leaving home just to escape the cycle of “I want to play vidya, no I can’t play vidya, let me do reddit/TH-cam/twitter instead”
Love your stuff! (Also you’re the one who got me into the McElroy brothers, so I’m forever grateful to you for that)
Holy hell, this was EVERYTHING I needed to hear right now. Thank you. I've been struggling in that same vortex of guilt and shame - needing to find time to relax to recharge, but needing to produce or effectively use my time, and not being able to produce anything because I'm so tired and empty, but not being able to even effectively relax because I feel each greasy second slipping through my tired fingers - and, whoops, 6 months have gone by and I haven't made a video.Time to sadly write to my Patrons, hat in hand... again.
Again, thank you. This isn't something I find myself able to talk about publicly - even with those closest to me - in part because of a lack of words, but mostly due to the fact that it's blood in the water. It's weakness. Admitting I need to stop (even for just a short time) is a form of failure. It's discrediting. It takes almost no effort for those who offer advice to flip from "why don't you just make something" to "why are you even doing this"? And having to constantly justify my desire to make videos to my loved ones over and over again would be straw that breaks this camel's back.
This video makes me as an artist feel seen.
OMG I love may!! Such a pleasant surprise to see her here
Powerful thoughts and powerful words, there are few in every generations that do think and feel like this and even fewer who able to to into words this eloquently. Thank you.
PREACH (also pay artists for their work) (also support creators you like on whatever platform they use to collect money) (also I love you ok bye)
I'm so glad I found this video in the middle of my quarter-life crisis... It helps. Thank you & excellent job. ⭐️
I'm here from the Matrix sequels video and i'm going to watch all of your content now because you are reading my brain waves and finishing my ideas for me and showing me things I haven't started to imagine yet. Just letting you know, thanks so much and I hope you're having a great fkn day!
Great video, Sarah. Thank you! You described that feeling of guilt over not being productive all the time so well. It is a problem. Made me feel a lot less alone to hear you talk about it. Love your nail polish, btw! 💅
I found your channel a few weeks ago and it's really filling the void of me having No Queer Theory/Postmodern Theory Classes this semester. Your pace is excellent, even for someone with the world's worst ADHD. I love how your content still feels like a discussion even though you're largely presentational. Thank you so much for what you do, and I can't wait to start keeping up with you more regularly!!
I've been thinking about this kind of stuff a lot. I've been trying to be a writer for twenty years or so, and it's only in the past few years that I've felt like I'm not only good at it but getting recognized for it, to the point where I could go pro if I want. If I'd known back when I was a teenager that I wouldn't get anything published for literally decades, would I have spent so many hours at it as I did thinking that every new story idea could be The One that got published? But if I didn't put in all those years, I could never have gotten this good at it. And I've enjoyed it too. I'm honestly never happier than when I'm writing. But I also know that I can only do it when I'm a bit distracted. I have to get involved in something else, and while I'm doing something else, I get that spark of inspiration and I have to go write about it. A writer can never be *just* a writer, or they won't have anything to write about.
This video really echoes a lot of that sentiment. It's why, even though I could go pro as a writer if I wanted, I don't want to. Not right now. I'm about to finish a degree so I can work in the public sector, and from that space, I hope to find more to write about. I will still be writing. I may even publish a book or two. Even if that happens, I don't see myself going full-time. If I do, I'll always have something else - gardening, volunteering, spiritual practice, family - that will probably take up more of my actual hours than writing. Because otherwise what the hell am I going to write about? I think I've gotten a good handle on the balance and not feeling guilty for not working. Play is work too. Rest is work too. It's all part of being alive.
Good luck with the move! Thanks for this video. I'll be showing it to some people who I think need to see it.
I think a lot of people consider your decision to pursue other things as a "half-commitment." I come across that attitude a lot when I say I want to be a choreographer. I mean, I should be at the studio all the time, right? Let me stress that training is absolutely necessary. But I think there are very valuable outside experiences that I can channel into what I make. And others that will improve/change who I am, and may or may not affect my work, but will undoubtedly impact my life as a whole. What I'm trying to say is- I think you've got a good perspective. I hope your love for writing (gardening, volunteering, spiritual practice, and family) lives as long as you do.
This video is a testament to your expertise on this topic. Thank you Sarah.
I think all artists are going to find that this video resonates with them on a fundamental level. For a long time, I never thought my art was really worth anything if I wasn't selling it. I'd keep trying to find "marketable" ideas for my art so I could start selling it but I always got stuck halfway through with burnout. I could never quite figure out why it didn't work, and I was always comparing myself to other people. Only recently was I able to find something that combined my crafty sensibilities with capitalism, and I found worth when it started working for me. At the same time however, I have this nagging thought in the back of my head that it isn't what I am "supposed" to do with my time. Being reminded that it's still work is incredibly reassuring.
Tristan talked about this on a stream that people often ask him to stream his DnD games but that he wants to keep that as a genuine real life interaction and not turn that into an interaction with his audience and that gave me a lot to think about.
oh my god the whole thing about how people just cannot see pieces of modern art that they dont like without being extremely entitled about the whole is akjsdhaskjdh ive been trying to put this into words for years now i love this video so much
This video hit scary close to home for me, thank you so much for putting this message out there. I really needed to hear it.
God I swear your videos make me cry so often.
(note: sorry for the really long comment)
To put in my 2 cents about it, I am a very small creator. I am a teenager, I do art, and sometimes put that art online, and sometimes I talk to people and make friends.
Most of the time that's it, that's what I put into the world, and I am working to some extent almost every time in go online to make people hear the things I do. And even if I am a very small creator, I still get a lot of the pressure of the things you said in this video.
When I go online or text people or socialise, there's always the part of me that's saying "You could be doing drawing right now. You've got unfinished projects and things to give to people, you should be working." And sometimes, that part of me telling me to do that is helpful, as it gets me to create things, but sometimes I just get stuck in the great loop of indecision about what I should be doing. It feels like there's no way to be satisfied in what you're doing, no matter what you do.
I think I have also made the realisation recently that I am always working, always putting things together, always thinking of things to say to people or even just the next tweet I'm going to make. I am also working on myself all the time, keeping my feelings in check, and making sure I don't stuff up. And all those things are tiring, they're really fucking tiring to do all the time (and sometimes being autistic can make it even harder).
*sigh* I don't know where this comment/small essay is going, so I'm just going to conclude. I agreed with all your points in this, and some of it hit real fucking close to home about the weight of creating things. Thank you and good job on this video!
I think I needed to hear this. I have been trying to write novels for years, but never can seem to get a plot that sticks and grows. I feel guilty for when I could be writing or working, but I know if I try to force the idea, I know I'll burn it out. Much love for your art, Sarah, enjoy the break!
When teaching academic writing, I always used to point out that when they were doing research for labour and the 8 hour work day, they also did research on intellectual labour as well as physical. It was updated in the 60s, where it is pointed out that more than 3 hours of doing is the maximum you can do, precisely because you always thinking. The other 2 hours of work is that walking away and processing. Yet this research is never engaged with. 80% of my doctoral thesis was thinking, but the best idea I had? During the weeks I took off.
I feel so dumb because or I'm 100% doing EVERYTHING or I'm burned out dead on the floor and I can't do a in between and I feel super guilty about it
This was such an incredible video that I had to leave a comment in support, and I will probably watch it again to really comprehend its message and internalize it!
I hope you get the restful break you need Sarah! In the meantime I’ll be catching up on your podcast, it’s so great!
Also to drive home how much I wanted to support this video with my praise, Google required me to make a TH-cam channel to comment, and I’ve been stubbornly holding out for over a year now because I didn’t wanna make a channel (and then feel stupidly obligated to put things there or maintain it in some way). It all ties back in lol. But today I said screw it, because I wanna be supportive of Sarah’s channel and video!
Astra Keelin Her podcasts are excellent, I agree. Also you certainly don’t have to upload anything to TH-cam.
Don't feel obligated... I started checking out the channels of people who comment after I started getting serious about my channel and discovered that like 99% of the channels on here are completely empty. Hell, there are probably more channels created by neo-nazis to troll people's comments than there are active channels posting comments. :P
What a great video. I want to say something clever and deep, but the only words I can form right now are just how good it felt to hear this from someone else.
Thank you for this. ♥
I always thought of you, Sarah, as a thinker (think: philosopher, thinker, sage, analyst, scientist) rather than an artist (musician, fiction writer, actor). That is what I experience watching your stuff: deep thought, critical outlook, analyses, ideas.
I find myself usually stuck in that guilt cycle and I end up feeling unproductive and uncreative. everything I consume, content-wise, then goes into the "how can I make money out of this?" box. I can't find a job it seems, so I have that pressure, but I miss the days when I used to draw for myself. I hope I can get my passion back. thank you for making this video. I needed it.
two days ago I finally started to watch videos about astronomy and space just for the fun of it and I kinda felt relieved. my field is fashion, so I tend to step away from it to avoid being too influenced and to take some time off, but it's usually just to distract myself. those space videos were not a distraction though and I'm happy I watched them.
I don't do art professionally, but as an academic that mostly does my research on my computer from home, I definitely feel the pressure to constantly do work whenever i have free time, and it's definitely exhausting.
Also just a generally really good video, love you Sarah!
hey! thanks for the personal attack!
i thought abt this some time ago too and tbh i think a lot of the people who go "oh i could do that" and dont get the asymmetrical value of art probably wouldnt complain if there wasn't money attached to it since a lot of that kind of stuff seen by them ends up being bought for and well, capitalism dont value labour good and they feel shafted for it i guess
i wish i could show this video to everyone so they could understand, as someone who makes art you really put all of my feelings into words
THIS VIDEO IS SO INSPIRING THANK YOU !!!!!!! IM GOING TO SEND IT TO MY BEST FRIEND WHO IS DOING A THESIS FILM & THEY'RE FREAKING OUT, BUT THEY'RE DOING SO GOOD AND IT'S SO AMAZING !!!!!! thanks so much the labor you do is not invisible to people who know what to look for
I feel like this is something I will have to return to. One of those good videos that I won't understand all at once, now, but will get more from when I watch it again and again.
It was really important for me to hear this tonight, right this moment. Got home from game night with my sister and have been feeling guilty for not utilizing my ADD meds enough today to get a bunch of my voice acting work done. I planned to do it when I got home, but I'm so exhausted, I watched this video instead, and I'm really, really glad I did. It's a weight from my shoulders. You did a great job, and I hope you're able to just feel okay and have fun, guilt-free, as often as possible!
This video came right for the jugular but in the good, very needed way
Thank you
My 11th grade AP English teacher is the person who first told me to stop stressing out about procrastinating and just enjoy it, and that's good because AP English was probably the hardest point in my life and I needed Skyrim at that time to stay sane.
I legitimately do not understand modern art, but I know that doesn't mean it is bad. Sometimes I just sit and watch people talk about modern art like "huh." It's interesting being the only non-creative type in a room full of creative types, since I'm a portraiture artist surrounded by people who actually do more than look at things and go "aha! I will recreate that thing exactly!"
thank you SO MUCH for covering what my life is basically like
This video reminded me of a video by Loading Ready Run, that I can't find, but basically, there's a girl, and she sees the guy going through his stuff, until he pulls out a glowing white orb. She asks what it is, and he happily tells her that it is the last thing in his life that makes him happy, that he hasn't monetized yet.
Smash cut to him reviewing it in a TH-cam video.
LRR is a channel where people basically just talk about any nerdy thing that could possibly make them happy, so it basically repaints all of their content as kind of an existential nightmare.
You of course didn’t know about the pandemic or anything, but this video very well applies to the way one experiences college during this. My college got rid of the mid-semester breaks, opting for a slightly later start and slightly early end to the semester with, in this spring, two “off days” they would give us randomly.
This year has been one, long dragging, draining, haltless dredge through heavy schoolwork. Particularly with (potential) ADHD, I have been stuck lagging behind everything and yet yearning to do the work. Stuck in my bed trying to get my energy back yet sitting, drained, empty yet having done nothing. Now it is the end of the year nearly, and I likely won’t pass a very important class-I barely passed the last one. I can’t be happy for anything, I can’t experiment because of the fucking plague, but I can’t work like I should be either. I’m stuck between these two things, I can’t be any more lazy and restful.
i am so glad i finished college before the pandemic, it sounds like an utter nightmare from start to finish. best of luck, you'll get through it one way or another
Oh my god, you've put into words exactly how I feel about doing the work. Dx I am two weeks away from graduating after working on my Bachelors for 6 years, 28 years old, and I feel like I need to immediately get a good job and start doing freelancing in my free time. Luckily my husband has been really sweet and has told me to take a full month to just play some video games and not worry about getting a job right away. I want to be able to give myself the same permission. Thank you for this video, it helps me feel like I can give myself that permission.
Wow! I totally feel like that! Thank you so much for this video!!!
This video really spoke to me. Thank you for putting in the time making it. I hope you enjoyed making it.
Just wanted to say thank you for putting into words how i feel about commodifying all of my time ;o; also your voice is very relaxing. thank you ❤️
ahhhhhh you're so right and it's such a weird feeling when everything you love and enjoy can become some kind of work. It's so important to enjoy things for their own sake, but it's so compelling to turn everything into creative work somehow!!! sometimes you just gotta lie in the flowers!!!!!!! (the flowers are your youtube videos and I'm lying in 'em rn)
Thank you, for telling me it's ok to take the time to grieve.
I think it's sometimes even more of a struggle when you're doing whatever creative thing you do alongside a full time real world job. You tell yourself that, because you have less free time, you need to spend more of it doing the thing.
Definitely. I completely burned myself out as a pianist during my maths degrees, though I'd been aware for a long time that there's a risk of getting sucked into the competitiveness of both areas.
this video meant a lot to me, i’m in art school right now training to be an illustrator and it’s a lot of the stuff i’ve been going through
When I was first getting into D&D, I tried to make it a stream for the very reasons you mentioned. I didn't feel like I could justify my interest in this new hobby unless I was monetising it somehow. But tbh it hurt my love for it somewhat, and playing online was actually not my jam. So, I made the distinct decision that at least in my current moment, for the foreseeable future, I want my RPG stuff to be only a thing I intentionally do for fun with me and my friends, and not give into the temptation to make my game a podcast or a web series or anything else.
i was distracted by the music, i kept thinking "jeez this is so familiar. i can't put my finger on it" every 30 seconds. then i checked the description and saw june's name and i was like O SHIT!!! i haven't listened to her stuff in years!!! i was freakin obsessed with "hope against hope" and "thank you" ten years ago! wow... gotta go buy those albums again.........
so that's my story about how you reminded me how good june's music is, but also i need to watch your entire video again because apparently i have the world's worst one-track mind and i got distracted from the meat of the video.
i can't say i didn't know this already on some level, but damn i really needed to hear it right now. thank you
Oh boy, this video hits home. This is a wonderfully woven reminder, thank you.
I find it unsettlingly ironic that I’ve been drawing nearly my entire life, and had a near unquenchable zest for it as a kid, but since my teenage years when art suddenly had to become my career choice, I’ve spent more time worrying about how much I’m not drawing than actual time drawing. I’m in my late 20’s now and I’m physically and mentally unable to draw like I used to.
Capitalism is a hell of a drug.
Oh my god, this video hits really close at home. I put a lot of time into my videos and I actually mostly stopped playing games or doing other fun activities because I feel really guilty whenever I'm not writing or editing.
Oh wow! This was such a good video. Thank you!
I'm in a bit of a unique situation where I simultaneously got a degree in an artistic field, and another in a more technical field. I've finished the program now, and besides the greater employability and salary from the technical degree, one of the big factors that has pushed me towards a more technical career with a 9-5 schedule has been this idea of finally being able to check out from work. Like, I'll be able to leave a building, and do what I want with the time that I have and not have that nagging feeling that I'm wasting my time.
I'm still going to keep up my artistic pursuits, but I feel like I can go at my own pace and focus more on what I like instead of always doing things that I can use to advance myself as an artist.
You are spot on about how sometimes you just need to walk away from something to let your mind rest, I've felt that very frequently.
Another thing I've noted (and this might be because my art is performative) is that there's a difference in how I feel after an unproductive day of technical vs artistic work. If I'm feeling a little off one day, I can still get something done in my technical work, even if I'm not working as fast. But with artistic work, the quality of the work is more tied to my current state of being. So if I'm just not feeling my best, I won't perform as well as I know that I can, which makes the whole pursuit feel very frustrating and discouraging for that whole day.
Good luck with the move! I’m still not totally recovered from moving almost 3 years ago. Take your time, we will be here!
I have never encountered another person who listens to Murder by Death. this is a very exciting development.
one of my favorite bands!
oh my gosh i haven't finished the video yet but you've just summed up my entire work ethic and anxieties and im just !!!!
makes me wanna die !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So true that nurses are the ones who actually do things. Doctors diagnose, prescribe, and make decisions, but they rely on nurses to physically do most things (other than surgery I suppose).
i come from a family of nurses, so i'm biased in this regard
❤️ this video really struck a chord w me, thank u for making it
Awesome video! I really enjoyed the editing in this one!
Your work on this video really paid off (it's an excellent work) I hope it paid off monetarily too! A suggestion for another video essay, limited to its proper role as labor that doesn't consume the rest of your life, of course: your thoughts on "On Writing".
At 5:32, holy shit I feel so freaking called out right now... This has been 99% of my last 3 years, oops
This is an amazing video, Sarah!!
Love the L cuts in this video, they are fantastic
Also your burnout making the transition video basically matches the exact experience I had making my first KH video
oops
Believe me, this is not just a problem for Millennials. I started writing movie reviews for my own websites years ago and I still torture myself over what movies I can watch based on whether I can generate opinions and thoughts about them or not. If I end up watching something utterly boring and middle of the road it often makes me quite angry because I just wasted valuable time.
oof, yea, this mindset is something i struggle a lot with in my daily life and creative work, learning, and improvement
and it’s really hard to move away from that kind of cycle of regret of not doing, but i know that i want and need to make that change in the way that i look at what i do and what it means about me
Sarah I love your work and you give me hope
Something that could help you with this is to make either physical or digital planning resources like mind maps or notes or skeleton drafts. I think that having a way to visualise the work that is being done makes it harder to rationalise that the work hasn't happened at all
I've been thinking about this, I very much appreciate it
great video, Sarah. gives me a lot to think about. one thing that stood to me is how precise and accurate your description of your procrastination was to mine? and i am, first of all, not doing work anything like yours - i am a college student in stem living off my parents. and i always thought this cycle of dissatisfyingly wasting my time was a product of my depression. i never really conceptualized it as a millenial thing. even with my awareness of myself and of my problems with the system i didn't fully make the connection as to why exactly my mental illness manifests the way it does - sure my parents contributed with how they treated me, but there's a bigger picture here i haven't let myself think too hard about yet.
i've gotten myself in to a place where no matter how much i come away from a problem i can't work out how to progress when i get back and worked up a negative association to trying to start anything 'productive' or leaving something 'not productive' i do still manage to start for more than a day or two
I like how the audio cuts before the video, it makes it seem like a documentary
Thank you so much for this.
In the book 'Why We Sleep' Mathew Walker suggests that our brains run simulations of the issues we have during the day, without the drain that waking thought has, whilst we sleep. He talks about various scientific tests he has done to try to prove it, it's a very interesting read and might be useful for anyone grappling with the topics brought up in this video in their personal lives, especially if you also feel you have an abnormal sleeping pattern.
In the context of this video sleep is a part of the essential "stepping away" process. Notice that sometimes it's hardest to fall asleep when you still haven't stepped away in the evening.
I really needed this, Ty Sarah
(Watching your GF on TH-cam while waiting for a plane to go see her is weeeeeeeird)
the labour of art is waiting for your girlfriend to crawl out of the screen to give you a hug
WE ARE NOT WORTHY
This is everything I have been thinking and feeling and you've put it into words PERFECTLY. This is Such Good Shit. And i feel like the ending is outside of "happy" and "unhappy" because it's a call to action, and those i think are happiness-neutral (to a certain extent). (Honestly I will probably embroider it at some point because it is So. True.)
(also your shirt is fucking great)
thank u sarah
I do this and also all I end up acheiving is mess! Mess in my head and in my workroom. No work, just the mess.
when she laughed in 9:09 i died you’re so cute sarahhhhh
Sarah, please take time if you need it. I don’t want you to burn out.
another amazing video!!! also i love your editing style 💗
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS!
I can relate a lot to what you said. Incredible video and opinion!
Thank you Sarah! this is so inspiring and uplifting. i'm gonna go play a video game and waste some time in your honor
I am in this situation now that I was overworking SO BADLY last few months (I draw commissions) that I never let myself rest until I have my work done so I could have enough money for my bills and food, but the thing is - I was so stressed that I bought so much shit just to feel better, that I had to work even more. And of course, I never did anything for myself, my health is still awful and my body is falling apart, and I hated drawing at the end of that so badly, that I didn’t want to open my laptop for a week when I decided that I have to stop. I need time for myself. I do now everything I wanted to do for the last 3 years of work non stop, i bake a lot, I sculpt, I walk a lot, I train myself, I’m planning to saw and do a lot of makeup soon too. And I realized I don’t need that much money and I can make myself happy just by resting and doing what I feel like doing, even though I don’t have a schedule, so it always feels like I’m working or have to work. It was hard to start doing anything for myself, I still can’t draw what I want, but I did so much stuff that reminded me that I’m a human being after all and I have my own ideas and can have fun and care about myself. I hope it will be possible to make my prices higher soon, so I could do that more (since I’m just spending all my last saved money to do that, I can’t do that all the time)
It really helped me and I hope if you are reading this and you are in the same situation - you should try that too. Money will always come back, but your health and time will not, so don’t loose yourself over something that you don’t really need
Also.. I want to create my own comic for a three years already, I have a most of the plot and characters, but it’s so hard to finish it and start writing and drawing. Is there anyone who can encourage me with their journey of creating something for too long? ;w;
Good luck with the move! I would say I'm curious about your take on the Homestuck Epilogues, but having only finished Meat so far and not being entirely sure how anyone I know has already gone through all of both, I don't want to put any pressure on that. Instead I'll just say I hope your day's good, and you experience the minimum of stress during the month off.
Hmmm.... Maybe it *wasn't* a happy note to end the video on, but I liked it. I like a lot of your videos because some of them feel like calls to action. Not necessarily in the same way as this one does("dismantle the harmful ways you think about your own work in order to be a healthier and happier person and help others do the same and also so crapitalism doesn't win") but they do inspire me to think deeply about the topics and related topics, which I think counts. A call to think about these things is still a call to *do something.*
What i guess I'm trying to say is that ending a video on a happy note isn't necessary to have the video be good. I feel like a happy note might have felt insincere? But i can't really place my finger on why. But it feels like the same reason why that one Contrapoints video you covered(the name escapes me at the moment) would have felt insincere if it had had ended on a happy note.
In any case, I really like this video, because the problems you've faced with burnout and anxiety around Not Working are problems I've also had. It's one thing to know I'm not alone, and another to hear it from someone else with the same problems.
Great piece. Thanks, Sarah! :D
I often feel that guilt about not getting the amount I wanted done on a given day... despite knowing it's a counter-productive idea.
I wanted to give myself a schedule, but I knew it would be detrimental gor me. I get what you say.
@@mimmikibilly Yeah, I don't schedule myself either, I just have an idea when I wake up in the morning of what I'm going to work on and sometimes roughly how much of it I'd like to finish. And then there are days when all I want to do is work and I can't even get a half-hour in because of external factors. That happens a lot more since we took in some extended family who lost a house recently.
@@WoohooliganComedy exactly. I hope that everything will be ok then for your relatives and you as well :)
@@mimmikibilly Thanks, Fruit! :D
@@WoohooliganComedy you're welcome :)