In my opinion, the most interesting change that has been made from the canon is Blake and Sun are the new Emerald and Mercury sent to infiltrate Beacon, but with Roman replacing Cinder as their overseer.
I'm glad that you're keeping the White Fang plot and making it a central political conflict right from the start. Sienna seems like she rides the line between antagonist and anti-hero, which is exactly what we hoped to see from her in canon.
@@ZonaiHero-ul5nm Fr, I expected them to meet in the main series since Adam got his trauma from the Schnee but I was left disappointing when they just turned him into the generic toxic boyfriend plot device for bumblebee
The beginning with each of our girls colours appearing with a word makes me think that is what the girls stories and arcs will focus on,yang wanting to ne the maidem and not getting picked,blake choosing where to place her allegiances,weiss and her posiibly figuring our the corrupt nature of her parents business,ruby and how far her hope can go,if this is the case i think thats so cool,especially since those 4 words are integral to the plot of rwby!!!!
I'm always so impressed with these RWBY "fixes" or au's, because they take some of the blandest stuff and turn it on its head in the most fun way imaginable! I'm LOVING the actual White Fang vs Schnee conflict you have set-up, but also seeing how Yang not being an influence on Ruby will affect her going forward
i love thought excersizes like this. like, whats ruby's relationship with qrow now that summer's alive? it must be good if she still uses a syth. but maybe there's an axe mode to mirror summer's weapon? what does tai think of yang living with raven? is cinder still a cleaning servant? is it a "what if tyrian was never arrested", or is it "what if the white fang broke tyrian out instead of salem"? did ren die in nora's childhood? questions, questions, questions. this is so fun!
Ruby and Oscar...such a great scene. Yang and Mercury as teammates stuck together is also such a good relationship. Wrote those halfway into the video...I love the setup!! I'm already waiting for plotlines to bump into one another and how those conflicts get averted, resolved, or made worse.
I just noticed that you gave Raven's Tribe its own name. I've always felt they needed more of an identity than 'gang of useless bum lookalikes' and the name Blackwing is great. Warcraft 2-esque, even. In addition to that, good job on making Willow a factor in the story from the start.
This story is SO ENGAGING! it’s fascinating the routes you took with each character and no joke I audibly gasped when I saw Nora in the bandit clan. NEVER something I would’ve thought of (her design is my favorite btw) I’m genuinely excited to see where the story goes✨
I’m 1000% here for this. It’s so cool seeing someone take established characters and plot elements and radically shifting everything. Like Adam being sent to kill Weiss? Sienna being around and her having interesting conflict with Adam? Raven already has a relic? Oscar is attending Beacon early with Ruby? Love it!
This is going to Be a Grand Adventure! Y'Know, Knowing That Summer was Canonically Dead/worse. It's Unnerving how She Stares Dead at us. Unnerving in a humourous way.
I want more!!!!! This is so neat, especially excited to learn more about Jaune. I always was disappointed why RWBY never touched on religion even though Qrow mentioned it and he wears a cross.
14:19 as a Dishonored fan hearing the words "Month of Storms" reminds me of Dishonored's month calendar and now i can't unthink that now. Cool series Judgemental Critter
I love how the dynamic between Summer and Ruby is "My mom is the coolest woman in the world!" - "Darling, please, go to sleep". While Yang and Raven is more like "You're so annoying" - "It's from family". Nora is still Nora and Mercury is still Mercury, but only the Gods know why they are with Raven. Weiss looks so racist, classist, xenophobic, egocentric and tyrannical... Exactly as you could picture somebody like her, but don't look as if she was a lost cause. In the other hand, is Oscar related to Ozpin or did Ozpin just say "Oh, an orphaw kid, You're mine now"? Adam, Tyrant, Sun and Blake being under the Seanna's authority is a perfect way to put them in the spotlight without taking off Seanna too fast. About the others... Only time, and Citter, know what they will become.
I really liked a lot of design changes here, my personal favorites being Weiss, Blake and Neo. I've read a lot of Fate Swap Fanfictions for this series, but I'm really enjoying the new types of ideas you're putting into this. This also kind of inspires me a little bit to maybe actually start making my AU of RWBY and post it, so thanks for that!
I always love the concept of strong women integral to the facet of the cosmos. So the Maiden concept is definitely something that excites me. I’m looking forward to the next chapter.
SPOILERS FOR THE VIDEO!! AND OVERLY EXCITED COMMENTS! The writing with this and the direction you seem to be taking this au is so FUN and EXCITING and GOOD, im already SO HOOKED!! i love the changes in designs you gave to everyone, but especially our main girls, and the change with the opening fight and the quick summer reveal was so cool. I really love that you put Nora, Mercury and Yang together in the bandit group. Idk if its intentional or not, especially since nora's color is pink and not orange but the way they make copper, silver and gold was so genius to me!! it was such a fun detail that jumped out to my attention the moment nora showed on screen with her cool outift. when you said in the announcement for this, i had taken the I also love the way you set up the currency and measurements of time/calender so naturally in the respective scenes! and that weiss isnt racist!!! Making tyrian part of the white fang is interesting, though i liked that he was a faunus villain that had nothing to do with the white fang, but i cant wait to see how you take his character! speaking of characters i cant wait to see in this au, I know its a long ways away, but i cant wait to see how you take junior in this!! if hes here at all ! id thought maybe not since he kinda exists almost entirely around yang and torchwick as characters and so maybe hes just not in the picture! but melanie and miltia gave me hope... all around OBSESSED w this already, shows so much quality and effort and passion!
I love how your critter icon TREMBLES with excitement as you release your first episode! I love how adorable the characters you drew are! Such huggable characters! I also liked how you separated Yang and Ruby, but gave them both their own mom. You did well taking on the first few episodes and setting up the different paths for each character. It seems like a more manageable universe but with the freedom of each character to choose their own path. Having each main character in Beacon, for different purposes will be a Petri Dish for independence and for changing fates. This is what's cool about the RWBY Fandom, if they want to rewrite RWBY, they do so and if they plan it out, they plan it well. Nice work!
As someone who's also working on my own rewrite for shows I like I have to say this is really good nice job I like that Weiss doesn't like her father talking bad about the white fang and the faunus
Blake and Sun's design look freaking dope. I like the direction your taking the story, showing the series from the perspective of each character with different roles and backgrounds instead of them all being huntsmen in the same team. Just dont create a bumblebee insident and we're good
Great set-up for our four main girls, as well as giving us hints to the Maidens from how Ruby is a candidate, same as Weiss while Yang was purposely not chosen for it, with no trick that it was Raven this entire time. We also see hints that Weiss isn't racist like her father seems to be(or doesn't like to advertise it) but she's still not a good person as she's more then willing to use her family name and weath to ger what she wants, even if that outright bribery as her mother tried to do with Ironwood. With Raven, I like the choice as along with actually rising her daugher, she probably didn't choose Yang because of special treatement, as she understands that it would put a life-long mark on your bank, but Yang wouldn't know that. Also, her being friends with Nora and Mercury feels like a recipe for chaos and I'm all for it. Also, the White Fang stuff seems like it would be fun to listen about as the story goes on, from how we're actually addressing the whole 'Adam and possible others being branded by the SDC', removing the Blake/Adam romance and how Ruby acknowledges that things aren't perfect, and while she's not a fan of violence, she's mature enough to see it wasn't out of a vacuum.
I like this kind of fanfic that are like... It's a good fanfic, it feels like it will be a great story, but it would absolutely not work as a standalone project. This is really what fanfiction exists for.
I wish you'd write the "rich people being manipulative with bribes" scenes with the same subtlety as the "hinting at future plot beats" scenes. It'd be more sinister that way and it'd feel more like you actually respect my ability to understand what's going on. Like how openly they're throwing money around very much gives "new money" when the Schnee family has such an "old money" vibe. They should be sending Ironwood donations and personal gifts constantly. Maybe the mom drops a line like "I sent a (so and so gift), has it arrived yet? What did you think?" as a bit of small talk before discussing the position being offered to Weiss, for example. A little goes a long way with these types of scenes.
This is good and as much as I would like to theorize/make some predictions I feel as if I do not have enough info to do so yet so I will hold off on that for now.
The changes made to Yang’s section were freaking bonkers (in a good way!) Nora and Mercury are with Yang’s tribe, you’ve already introduced the concept of Maidens, and there’s the implication that the freaking Relic of Knowledge is in Raven’s possession. I’m very excited to see how these changes affect the plot and how Yang joins the main plot later. Also, the changes you made to Blake’s story and Weiss’ story are very intriguing. I’m curious how the conflict between Weiss and Adam goes, because there’s so much potential with those two.
Pretty well done intro. I like how the four main girls are similar enough to canon to be recognizable, wile also being a different, given the changes to this world. I interested by the theme of mother-daughter relationships, well possibly except for Blake. Maybe she's got a surrogate mother figure in Sienna, we'll have to wait and see. Also interesting is the situation with Weiss and how she's getting by through a combo of legit overachieving and mommy greasing the wheels for her. I'm definitely on board, looking forward to see how this story plays out.
I love what you've established here! They're so different yet so similar. This interactions are golden! Their lives are so interestingly twisted. Blake's outfit is my favorite!😍
oh, I think I know the reference to Sun's jacket! It's a reference to when Sun Wukong cut a tiger's fur to use on his clothes (if I'm not mistaken)! I loved this reference!
My rosegarden heart actively squealed at Ruby and Oscar! My god you made them so cute!!! Nora is a freaking cutie and her design is absolutely beautiful! That animal crossing joke still wasn't funny but it did make me crack smile! I absolutely loved it! I can't wait for the next one!!!
Id bet the antagonist were the hardest to write for, there's already so little to go off of but then you have to change them while trying to keep them an antagonist.
Well color me intrigued with this au, I really like it so far! Seeing Nora and Merc in the bandit camp with Raven and Yang is really interesting to me, as it could have happened. Can't wait to see the next ep :)
All I have to say Critter, is that you putting your heart and mind into this project. I look forward to see, what the other episodes will provide us. Keep up the good work!
I think you struck a good balance between adding your own touches and still keeping volume 1's story in a recognisable form. Can't wait for the next episode
Really fun start! I like how everyone is being characterized so far, as well as all the little details from character interactions. Cant wait to see more!
Well, Willow did give him money but he didn't exactly accept it. I imagine he probably doesn't throw out the money she gives but he probably invests it in the school or for charitable causes rather than the military or himself? I hope so at least.
@@gokbay3057 It would be unnatural I mean I know this is reverse verse (xd) but you know some things stayed the same from the original when it comes to behaviour of charachters
I love how youre already setting up that more than likely adams attempted assasination of Weiss is gonna force her to leave and go to Beacon. I also feel like youre gonna pair Ruby and Blake up since they infamously have zero time together, so making them the closest in this rewrite is a fun reversion! Cant wait for more!
I have a suggestion that I think would be hilarious! Make Oscar's mother a genderbent Hazel! Perhaps in this universe, Gretchen (who has the same muscular build as Hazel) lives to become Oscar's mother but Hazel dies.
Oh my god your Sun design is incredible I was actually getting monkey king vibes from the character based off the monkey king. I want that shirt so bad
So many great designs! Yang, Nora, and Mercury's all reflect their personalities and new histories really well. Yang's looks pretty nice since she probably does lowkey get some special treatment from Raven. Nora looks like she takes fun pink baubles wherever she can get them, while Mercury looks like he joined recently and was only able to add some armor to the clothes he ran away from his dad in. Sun's look also reflects his personality more than his canon one (and isn't there a tiger fur thing in Journey to the West?). Seeing Blake in black and purple is weirdly enlightening--I never thought of removing most of the white and the actual outfit implies that she will be the more mellow and business-like of the White Fang duo. Neo's new outfit looks super cute too. As for the plot, the decision to drop the maidens and relics in right away is paying off, and better defining both the Faunus oppression and the White Fang's violent responses is more compelling than what we got in canon. I'm also super excited about how members of the looks-cool-but-died-pretty-quickly club are making an appearance. Removing Aura actually makes Tock's semblance useful. I also liked how Ruby's immature side came off really strongly with how she dealt with the first henchman.
Dang only episode 1 and I'm already loving this and intrigued by the story. I love that you establish the maidens and relics right away, I'm very curious where you're planning on taking this, also love that there is an actual conflict between the Schnees and white fang since I've always thought there was so much story potential and I'm still baffled the actual show didn't capitalize on it. Between Celtic's series and this, you guys are spoiling us.
This is amazing! I'm already seeing the offshoots, and I'm just excited like I was all those years ago. Makes me wish I had a mic of my own to contribute my own voice for the giggles.
I'm been so ready for this video ever since you talked about it on the RWBY watchalongs. I'm amazed! Already hooked on this series. Can't wait for episode 2!
Very interesting! The good kind of interesting that will keep me wondering what the next episode will bring! I really enjoyed seeing the different lives and personalities you put the characters in! I can’t wait to see what you have in mind for all this characters! also, this is just me being bias over here, please ignore but I like the whole idea in not having Weiss or Ruby in a relationship with anyone. I feel that they’re both amazing that they don’t need relationship with anyone to show that! Overall I’m excited to see what your AU will have!!! ❤❤❤❤
Omg, it's just the first episode and I'm hooked! I can't wait to see what happens and how my characters have changed in this world. I'm eagerly waiting for the next episode.
Hmm, very interesting. A lot of familiar faces but in unfamiliar places. I'm excited to see how all their interactions go as the story progresses. Out of all the changes, the one I fixate on is Tock. Like, isn't she Calavera's age? It is likely to be an image placeholder, but it brings up questions about the AU. Will Critter feature a young Maria as a teacher? Will Tock dive into Aura, supposing that it can keep you young with training? Also, the fact that she protected the Airship with, I'm assuming, her Aura tickles the Headcanon part of my brain. I'm intrigued to see if Critter will dive into Aura Mechanics. Thank you, Critter, for the awesome content. Have a wonderful day everyone! P.s. Summer A-posing to assert dominance! Edit: Just rewatched the introduction to the AU and I am both deaf AND blind. Sorry Critter for my assumptions.
To answer some of your questions! I'm playing fast and loose with ages here, which is why Tock is alive and also young. As for what she did with the airship, remember how Neo changed a Haven airship to look like an Atlas one with her semblance? Tock is also using her semblance to make the airship invincible! :) And you have a wonderful day too! :D
Team - ROBN (like the bird robin) Ruby, Oscar, Blake, Neo It would be fun to see Ruby lead this team. Oscar, being the same age, works well with Ruby and also gives her a chance to show her growth as a character. We have Blake, who is working for the white fang and adds intrigue and then we all love neo, and the idea she is still working with Torchwick is fun! It would be fun to see. Two childish characters working with two silent characters (since blake was very quiet at first and neo cannot speak) This is just my idea tho
So much stuff happened, I actually had to remind myself that this is just one episode because i forgot. That's soo good, i'm excited to see the next episodes
I’m aware some mysterious but no doubt handsome devil pointed this out on Twitter but it’s a cool detail differentiating the characters that were changed vs unchanged. Unchanged characters do not get new designs with the partial exception of summer getting white pupils for in lore reasons
I'm really really interested in how you changed the characters!! I'm sure this will be expanded upon with more episodes but I'm so interested in why Wiess isn't biased against faunus this time around And seeing Oscar and Ruby get to have time to be kids together is so sweet I'm also way into the voice over, I listened to this on my walk home but could still tell who's who Cool shit :>
Thats a great idea having Summer be the weaponry teacher (I assume you mean weapon designing and crafting) as that would explain how Ruby is so good with weapons as well as adding an extra dimension to Beacon education that was really lacking in show.
I’ve come to a horrifying realization assuming Ironwood is trying to pick a candidate for the next winter maiden. What happened to winter? And if Tock is alive then does that mean she killed Maria in this timeline? Or am I reading too much into it.
Weiss being in blue when that's a constant critique genuinely confused me for a sec before I started thinking maybe she'll be in white when the team becomes RWBY Edit: the girls starting off with their moms is MMM, DELISH. Mother-daughter dynamics are always a surefire place for conflict and strong relationship exploration prompts. Omg Jaune praying bc of his Joan of Arc inspo slaps. Holy boy Jaune is a RIOT and I kinda hope he is on the Torchwick team but probably not. Bit of a bummer Yang is so serious right off the bat tho, the only reason she was a fave early on was how fun she was(TT~TT)
With all the fanfictions and rewrites and fan arts, RWBY might as well have a multiverse. We entering the RWBYverse with this one
It's the endgame now
Indeed! Can't wait to read one where Ironwood doesn't die!
The canon of the show is much easier to accept if it's only one of many canons.
That is SO much better than the Arc-verse.
@@astereotypicalgamer1708 version 137, perhaps
In my opinion, the most interesting change that has been made from the canon is Blake and Sun are the new Emerald and Mercury sent to infiltrate Beacon, but with Roman replacing Cinder as their overseer.
Great job
1st theory Team ROSE will consist of Ruby, Oscar, Sun, and Emerald.
That would be awesome
i guess she would bring in oscar early so he can develop, I wonder if she will do rose garden... (wrote this before watching the video)
Yes
Ooh~! Interesting!!!
Literally all my favs
I'm glad that you're keeping the White Fang plot and making it a central political conflict right from the start. Sienna seems like she rides the line between antagonist and anti-hero, which is exactly what we hoped to see from her in canon.
Yeah also it seems like a meeting between Weiss and Adam is on the horizon and I can’t wait for that.
@@ZonaiHero-ul5nm Fr, I expected them to meet in the main series since Adam got his trauma from the Schnee but I was left disappointing when they just turned him into the generic toxic boyfriend plot device for bumblebee
The beginning with each of our girls colours appearing with a word makes me think that is what the girls stories and arcs will focus on,yang wanting to ne the maidem and not getting picked,blake choosing where to place her allegiances,weiss and her posiibly figuring our the corrupt nature of her parents business,ruby and how far her hope can go,if this is the case i think thats so cool,especially since those 4 words are integral to the plot of rwby!!!!
I'm always so impressed with these RWBY "fixes" or au's, because they take some of the blandest stuff and turn it on its head in the most fun way imaginable!
I'm LOVING the actual White Fang vs Schnee conflict you have set-up, but also seeing how Yang not being an influence on Ruby will affect her going forward
Interesting, ppl shit on FRWBY and others all the time for existing
Actually FNKI bans you if you talk about them
is mercury supposed to be a silver eyed warrior?!
That... sounds like a good idea. A rogue Silver-Eyed Warrior. Who said they all use their powers for good?
Oh yeah, he does seem to have the white pupils Critter mentioned in her announcement video.
First ever after high,
now rwby!
Judgmental critter u are truly a gifted and generous storyteller!
Aww! Thank you! :D
i love thought excersizes like this. like, whats ruby's relationship with qrow now that summer's alive? it must be good if she still uses a syth. but maybe there's an axe mode to mirror summer's weapon? what does tai think of yang living with raven? is cinder still a cleaning servant? is it a "what if tyrian was never arrested", or is it "what if the white fang broke tyrian out instead of salem"? did ren die in nora's childhood?
questions, questions, questions. this is so fun!
Ruby and Oscar...such a great scene.
Yang and Mercury as teammates stuck together is also such a good relationship.
Wrote those halfway into the video...I love the setup!! I'm already waiting for plotlines to bump into one another and how those conflicts get averted, resolved, or made worse.
I just noticed that you gave Raven's Tribe its own name. I've always felt they needed more of an identity than 'gang of useless bum lookalikes' and the name Blackwing is great. Warcraft 2-esque, even. In addition to that, good job on making Willow a factor in the story from the start.
This story is SO ENGAGING! it’s fascinating the routes you took with each character and no joke I audibly gasped when I saw Nora in the bandit clan. NEVER something I would’ve thought of (her design is my favorite btw) I’m genuinely excited to see where the story goes✨
All hail the great A-posing Rose!!
I love that you brought in important plot things (like maidens and the implied relics) in the first episode
I’m 1000% here for this. It’s so cool seeing someone take established characters and plot elements and radically shifting everything. Like Adam being sent to kill Weiss? Sienna being around and her having interesting conflict with Adam? Raven already has a relic? Oscar is attending Beacon early with Ruby? Love it!
Yo this seems really cool. Having Adam and Weiss actually be in the same room- let alone fight is going to be amazing 🤩
This is going to Be a Grand Adventure!
Y'Know, Knowing That Summer was Canonically Dead/worse.
It's Unnerving how She Stares Dead at us.
Unnerving in a humourous way.
I want more!!!!! This is so neat, especially excited to learn more about Jaune. I always was disappointed why RWBY never touched on religion even though Qrow mentioned it and he wears a cross.
I'm in love with blake design
omg ikr!? shes sooooo STYLISH!!!
I really like it but I think she should have put more black (unless she means to change the colors the girls represent because they're opposites)
@bruvance agreed though I also imagine it's intentional. I especially like how yellow is used as an accent color and that she has cat slit-pupils
14:19 as a Dishonored fan hearing the words "Month of Storms" reminds me of Dishonored's month calendar and now i can't unthink that now.
Cool series Judgemental Critter
I just love how RWBY the show has inspired so many creatives to put their own spin on the story.
Great work, JC.
I love how the dynamic between Summer and Ruby is "My mom is the coolest woman in the world!" - "Darling, please, go to sleep".
While Yang and Raven is more like "You're so annoying" - "It's from family".
Nora is still Nora and Mercury is still Mercury, but only the Gods know why they are with Raven.
Weiss looks so racist, classist, xenophobic, egocentric and tyrannical... Exactly as you could picture somebody like her, but don't look as if she was a lost cause.
In the other hand, is Oscar related to Ozpin or did Ozpin just say "Oh, an orphaw kid, You're mine now"?
Adam, Tyrant, Sun and Blake being under the Seanna's authority is a perfect way to put them in the spotlight without taking off Seanna too fast.
About the others... Only time, and Citter, know what they will become.
I really liked a lot of design changes here, my personal favorites being Weiss, Blake and Neo. I've read a lot of Fate Swap Fanfictions for this series, but I'm really enjoying the new types of ideas you're putting into this.
This also kind of inspires me a little bit to maybe actually start making my AU of RWBY and post it, so thanks for that!
I always love the concept of strong women integral to the facet of the cosmos. So the Maiden concept is definitely something that excites me. I’m looking forward to the next chapter.
SPOILERS FOR THE VIDEO!! AND OVERLY EXCITED COMMENTS!
The writing with this and the direction you seem to be taking this au is so FUN and EXCITING and GOOD, im already SO HOOKED!! i love the changes in designs you gave to everyone, but especially our main girls, and the change with the opening fight and the quick summer reveal was so cool. I really love that you put Nora, Mercury and Yang together in the bandit group. Idk if its intentional or not, especially since nora's color is pink and not orange but the way they make copper, silver and gold was so genius to me!! it was such a fun detail that jumped out to my attention the moment nora showed on screen with her cool outift. when you said in the announcement for this, i had taken the I also love the way you set up the currency and measurements of time/calender so naturally in the respective scenes! and that weiss isnt racist!!! Making tyrian part of the white fang is interesting, though i liked that he was a faunus villain that had nothing to do with the white fang, but i cant wait to see how you take his character! speaking of characters i cant wait to see in this au, I know its a long ways away, but i cant wait to see how you take junior in this!! if hes here at all ! id thought maybe not since he kinda exists almost entirely around yang and torchwick as characters and so maybe hes just not in the picture! but melanie and miltia gave me hope... all around OBSESSED w this already, shows so much quality and effort and passion!
I love how your critter icon TREMBLES with excitement as you release your first episode! I love how adorable the characters you drew are! Such huggable characters! I also liked how you separated Yang and Ruby, but gave them both their own mom. You did well taking on the first few episodes and setting up the different paths for each character. It seems like a more manageable universe but with the freedom of each character to choose their own path. Having each main character in Beacon, for different purposes will be a Petri Dish for independence and for changing fates. This is what's cool about the RWBY Fandom, if they want to rewrite RWBY, they do so and if they plan it out, they plan it well. Nice work!
As someone who's also working on my own rewrite for shows I like I have to say this is really good nice job I like that Weiss doesn't like her father talking bad about the white fang and the faunus
Blake and Sun's design look freaking dope.
I like the direction your taking the story, showing the series from the perspective of each character with different roles and backgrounds instead of them all being huntsmen in the same team.
Just dont create a bumblebee insident and we're good
Very different. Looking forward to seeing where this all goes.
Great set-up for our four main girls, as well as giving us hints to the Maidens from how Ruby is a candidate, same as Weiss while Yang was purposely not chosen for it, with no trick that it was Raven this entire time. We also see hints that Weiss isn't racist like her father seems to be(or doesn't like to advertise it) but she's still not a good person as she's more then willing to use her family name and weath to ger what she wants, even if that outright bribery as her mother tried to do with Ironwood.
With Raven, I like the choice as along with actually rising her daugher, she probably didn't choose Yang because of special treatement, as she understands that it would put a life-long mark on your bank, but Yang wouldn't know that. Also, her being friends with Nora and Mercury feels like a recipe for chaos and I'm all for it.
Also, the White Fang stuff seems like it would be fun to listen about as the story goes on, from how we're actually addressing the whole 'Adam and possible others being branded by the SDC', removing the Blake/Adam romance and how Ruby acknowledges that things aren't perfect, and while she's not a fan of violence, she's mature enough to see it wasn't out of a vacuum.
I like this kind of fanfic that are like... It's a good fanfic, it feels like it will be a great story, but it would absolutely not work as a standalone project. This is really what fanfiction exists for.
I wish you'd write the "rich people being manipulative with bribes" scenes with the same subtlety as the "hinting at future plot beats" scenes. It'd be more sinister that way and it'd feel more like you actually respect my ability to understand what's going on. Like how openly they're throwing money around very much gives "new money" when the Schnee family has such an "old money" vibe. They should be sending Ironwood donations and personal gifts constantly. Maybe the mom drops a line like "I sent a (so and so gift), has it arrived yet? What did you think?" as a bit of small talk before discussing the position being offered to Weiss, for example. A little goes a long way with these types of scenes.
This is good and as much as I would like to theorize/make some predictions I feel as if I do not have enough info to do so yet so I will hold off on that for now.
The changes made to Yang’s section were freaking bonkers (in a good way!)
Nora and Mercury are with Yang’s tribe, you’ve already introduced the concept of Maidens, and there’s the implication that the freaking Relic of Knowledge is in Raven’s possession. I’m very excited to see how these changes affect the plot and how Yang joins the main plot later.
Also, the changes you made to Blake’s story and Weiss’ story are very intriguing. I’m curious how the conflict between Weiss and Adam goes, because there’s so much potential with those two.
I'm with you there. It's criminal that Weiss and Adam never had a substantial interaction in the show.
Pretty well done intro. I like how the four main girls are similar enough to canon to be recognizable, wile also being a different, given the changes to this world. I interested by the theme of mother-daughter relationships, well possibly except for Blake. Maybe she's got a surrogate mother figure in Sienna, we'll have to wait and see. Also interesting is the situation with Weiss and how she's getting by through a combo of legit overachieving and mommy greasing the wheels for her. I'm definitely on board, looking forward to see how this story plays out.
THE TWINS ARE HERE LETS GO
I love their redesigns
9:46 YOOO OSCAR! So good to see you little dude! No idea where we’re headed in this narrative but I’m always glad to have you along for the ride.
I love what you've established here! They're so different yet so similar. This interactions are golden! Their lives are so interestingly twisted.
Blake's outfit is my favorite!😍
oh, I think I know the reference to Sun's jacket! It's a reference to when Sun Wukong cut a tiger's fur to use on his clothes (if I'm not mistaken)! I loved this reference!
Yeah!! You got it! :D
AHHH THIS HAS SUCH GOOD WRITING ALREADY IM SO EXCITED
My rosegarden heart actively squealed at Ruby and Oscar! My god you made them so cute!!! Nora is a freaking cutie and her design is absolutely beautiful! That animal crossing joke still wasn't funny but it did make me crack smile! I absolutely loved it! I can't wait for the next one!!!
Oh there are so many fascinating developments here.
And Neo looks so CUTE!
Id bet the antagonist were the hardest to write for, there's already so little to go off of but then you have to change them while trying to keep them an antagonist.
I am in love with this so far omg I love how you're using the characters we know in new ways I cannot wait for more!!
Well color me intrigued with this au, I really like it so far! Seeing Nora and Merc in the bandit camp with Raven and Yang is really interesting to me, as it could have happened. Can't wait to see the next ep :)
This is awesome! I love Blake and Nora's designs. It's amazing how much plot you crammed into one episode.
God, I love blakes design. But my favourite part is Weiss' voice, its so over the top I love it.
All I have to say Critter, is that you putting your heart and mind into this project. I look forward to see, what the other episodes will provide us. Keep up the good work!
I think you struck a good balance between adding your own touches and still keeping volume 1's story in a recognisable form. Can't wait for the next episode
Really fun start! I like how everyone is being characterized so far, as well as all the little details from character interactions. Cant wait to see more!
A very interesting start, well done juggling all the plot points and making an effort to tie things together from the beginning.
I hope Ironwood isn't corrupt, I really liked the fact that he was incorruptable and was a sing of order
Well, Willow did give him money but he didn't exactly accept it. I imagine he probably doesn't throw out the money she gives but he probably invests it in the school or for charitable causes rather than the military or himself? I hope so at least.
@@gokbay3057 It would be unnatural I mean I know this is reverse verse (xd) but you know some things stayed the same from the original when it comes to behaviour of charachters
Weiss' default Windows laptop aakfjeosodjdnwkwoffjdj lmaoooo
I love how youre already setting up that more than likely adams attempted assasination of Weiss is gonna force her to leave and go to Beacon. I also feel like youre gonna pair Ruby and Blake up since they infamously have zero time together, so making them the closest in this rewrite is a fun reversion! Cant wait for more!
19:11 Neopolitan!!! This Neo looks friendly!!!
I have a suggestion that I think would be hilarious! Make Oscar's mother a genderbent Hazel! Perhaps in this universe, Gretchen (who has the same muscular build as Hazel) lives to become Oscar's mother but Hazel dies.
Oh my god your Sun design is incredible I was actually getting monkey king vibes from the character based off the monkey king. I want that shirt so bad
Ok the purple with Blake's black color scheme was just perfect.
So many great designs! Yang, Nora, and Mercury's all reflect their personalities and new histories really well. Yang's looks pretty nice since she probably does lowkey get some special treatment from Raven. Nora looks like she takes fun pink baubles wherever she can get them, while Mercury looks like he joined recently and was only able to add some armor to the clothes he ran away from his dad in. Sun's look also reflects his personality more than his canon one (and isn't there a tiger fur thing in Journey to the West?). Seeing Blake in black and purple is weirdly enlightening--I never thought of removing most of the white and the actual outfit implies that she will be the more mellow and business-like of the White Fang duo. Neo's new outfit looks super cute too.
As for the plot, the decision to drop the maidens and relics in right away is paying off, and better defining both the Faunus oppression and the White Fang's violent responses is more compelling than what we got in canon. I'm also super excited about how members of the looks-cool-but-died-pretty-quickly club are making an appearance. Removing Aura actually makes Tock's semblance useful. I also liked how Ruby's immature side came off really strongly with how she dealt with the first henchman.
Dang only episode 1 and I'm already loving this and intrigued by the story. I love that you establish the maidens and relics right away, I'm very curious where you're planning on taking this, also love that there is an actual conflict between the Schnees and white fang since I've always thought there was so much story potential and I'm still baffled the actual show didn't capitalize on it. Between Celtic's series and this, you guys are spoiling us.
This is awesome I can’t wait to see more episodes of this AU. But I hope you haven’t forgotten or abandoned your making RWBY better series.
I haven't forgotten! I've got a lot of comments recently asking for it, so I think I'll try and prioritize getting it done sooner! :D
@@thejudgmentalcritter6584 Thanks, good to know.
Really like the new directions and twists added to the story. As well as some of the characters new rooks.
Looking forward to the next one.
This is amazing! I'm already seeing the offshoots, and I'm just excited like I was all those years ago. Makes me wish I had a mic of my own to contribute my own voice for the giggles.
I'm been so ready for this video ever since you talked about it on the RWBY watchalongs. I'm amazed! Already hooked on this series. Can't wait for episode 2!
Very interesting! The good kind of interesting that will keep me wondering what the next episode will bring! I really enjoyed seeing the different lives and personalities you put the characters in! I can’t wait to see what you have in mind for all this characters! also, this is just me being bias over here, please ignore but I like the whole idea in not having Weiss or Ruby in a relationship with anyone. I feel that they’re both amazing that they don’t need relationship with anyone to show that! Overall I’m excited to see what your AU will have!!! ❤❤❤❤
This was great! I can feel the passion in this project and I can't wait for the next one! I'm most excited to see what you do with the white fang
Monty would be so proud of you for this. I miss him so much
Omg, it's just the first episode and I'm hooked! I can't wait to see what happens and how my characters have changed in this world. I'm eagerly waiting for the next episode.
I like where this is going. Keep it up! 👍
Hmm, very interesting.
A lot of familiar faces but in unfamiliar places. I'm excited to see how all their interactions go as the story progresses.
Out of all the changes, the one I fixate on is Tock. Like, isn't she Calavera's age? It is likely to be an image placeholder, but it brings up questions about the AU.
Will Critter feature a young Maria as a teacher?
Will Tock dive into Aura, supposing that it can keep you young with training?
Also, the fact that she protected the Airship with, I'm assuming, her Aura tickles the Headcanon part of my brain. I'm intrigued to see if Critter will dive into Aura Mechanics.
Thank you, Critter, for the awesome content.
Have a wonderful day everyone!
P.s.
Summer A-posing to assert dominance!
Edit:
Just rewatched the introduction to the AU and I am both deaf AND blind.
Sorry Critter for my assumptions.
To answer some of your questions!
I'm playing fast and loose with ages here, which is why Tock is alive and also young.
As for what she did with the airship, remember how Neo changed a Haven airship to look like an Atlas one with her semblance? Tock is also using her semblance to make the airship invincible! :)
And you have a wonderful day too! :D
@@thejudgmentalcritter6584 Wow!
That's smart step up for her Semblance.
Team - ROBN (like the bird robin)
Ruby, Oscar, Blake, Neo
It would be fun to see Ruby lead this team. Oscar, being the same age, works well with Ruby and also gives her a chance to show her growth as a character. We have Blake, who is working for the white fang and adds intrigue and then we all love neo, and the idea she is still working with Torchwick is fun!
It would be fun to see. Two childish characters working with two silent characters (since blake was very quiet at first and neo cannot speak)
This is just my idea tho
3:31 not related to the video, but this made me realize how good Summer’s design is. At least to me
Loving the new Ruby design!Always wanted to see more pink in her outfit, it looks great!!
I hope this series takes off! You did an amazing job!
So much stuff happened, I actually had to remind myself that this is just one episode because i forgot. That's soo good, i'm excited to see the next episodes
You're in luck, volume 1 is finished! There's a playlist with all the episodes on my channel! :D
Have you kept Ruby and Yang as sisters? Great start so far. Ready to see how the world building takes hold of the new story
Off to a good start. Important people and concepts being introduced early and a sweet cliffhanger near the end.
I’m aware some mysterious but no doubt handsome devil pointed this out on Twitter but it’s a cool detail differentiating the characters that were changed vs unchanged.
Unchanged characters do not get new designs with the partial exception of summer getting white pupils for in lore reasons
Oh hey, Yang finally got some comerades! Thats more than we got in 10+ years alreaddy
Will everyone be getting redesigns or only certain characters? (Love this so much btw, can't wait to see the story unfold!)
Only certain characters for now, but that can change as the story progresses! :)
The sexual tension between ozpin and summer is… alarming
I was aiming for "grandparent" vibes, like Summer see's Oz as a parental figure. I'll work on that! lol
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Yeah Baby! That’s what I’ve been waiting for!
Love this take on the series, always interested in AUs of any universe
I'm really really interested in how you changed the characters!!
I'm sure this will be expanded upon with more episodes but I'm so interested in why Wiess isn't biased against faunus this time around
And seeing Oscar and Ruby get to have time to be kids together is so sweet
I'm also way into the voice over, I listened to this on my walk home but could still tell who's who
Cool shit :>
thats a really cool idea have the storm leave immediately to foreshadow Vernal's maiden powers.
Wiess winning fights? 8:03 this turely is an alternative relatily where fates are swaped
My interest has been peaked
So Interesting with many differences from the original was. Looking forward to see more of this and Thank You.
I genuinely love your design for yang she gives me primal warrior vibes
Thats a great idea having Summer be the weaponry teacher (I assume you mean weapon designing and crafting) as that would explain how Ruby is so good with weapons as well as adding an extra dimension to Beacon education that was really lacking in show.
I’ve come to a horrifying realization assuming Ironwood is trying to pick a candidate for the next winter maiden.
What happened to winter?
And if Tock is alive then does that mean she killed Maria in this timeline?
Or am I reading too much into it.
8:46 Roman doesn't look any different!!! He looks practically the same!!!
Yeah, he's exactly the same. Not everyone is going to have a reversed fate, or their fate wont reverse until later in the story :)
Weiss being in blue when that's a constant critique genuinely confused me for a sec before I started thinking maybe she'll be in white when the team becomes RWBY
Edit: the girls starting off with their moms is MMM, DELISH. Mother-daughter dynamics are always a surefire place for conflict and strong relationship exploration prompts.
Omg Jaune praying bc of his Joan of Arc inspo slaps. Holy boy Jaune is a RIOT and I kinda hope he is on the Torchwick team but probably not. Bit of a bummer Yang is so serious right off the bat tho, the only reason she was a fave early on was how fun she was(TT~TT)
Specifically I wanted Weiss to be in a similar color pallet as her mother! :)
@@thejudgmentalcritter6584 ooh, that makes sense! I can hazard a guess as to why as well, very clever
14:00 my favorite scene! I love Weis in this!
Weis: Mom dad is being racist again!
*sounds of muffled should-be-divorced in the background*
Very cool, also congrats on hitting 60k subscribers ❤
Thank you! :D
This series is incredible
I love that relics and maidens are already introduced in the first episode!
I'm loving this direction so far, can't wait to see more.
Interesting and fun concept cant wait to hear more
Yo this was great can't wait to see more my favourite designs blake but all your designs were great it's a really cute art style